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Kindness Versus Niceness

Kindness Versus Niceness

Released Wednesday, 27th December 2023
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Kindness Versus Niceness

Kindness Versus Niceness

Kindness Versus Niceness

Kindness Versus Niceness

Wednesday, 27th December 2023
Good episode? Give it some love!
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Episode Transcript

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0:00

This podcast is part of the Deluxe Edition

0:02

Network . To find other great shows

0:05

on the network , head over to deluxeeditionnetworkcom

0:08

. That's deluxeeditionnetworkcom

0:11

. Kindness

0:14

, we see it all around us . We

0:16

see it when someone pays for someone else's coffee

0:19

or holds the door open for another person

0:21

. We see it in the smallest

0:23

of gestures , like a smile or

0:25

a kind word . But it's different

0:27

when we turn on the news or social media

0:29

. Oftentimes what we

0:32

hear about what outlets are pushing

0:34

is the opposite of kind . Welcome

0:37

to the Kindness Matters podcast . Our

0:39

goal is to give you a place to relax

0:41

, to revel in stories of people

0:43

who have received or given kindness

0:45

, a place to inspire and

0:48

motivate each and every one of us to

0:50

practice kindness every day . Hello

0:53

and welcome to the Kindness Matters

0:55

podcast . I am your host , mike

0:58

Rathbun , and this podcast is

1:01

a part of the Deluxe Edition Network

1:03

. With over 28 different shows

1:05

in the den , you're going to find something

1:07

you like . For example , if

1:10

you're a fan of movies and alcohol

1:12

and kindness , check

1:15

out this month's podcast of the month , bev's

1:18

Video , kingdom , barrel-aged

1:20

Flicks and yours truly , the

1:22

Kindness Matters podcast . You

1:24

won't be sorry . That's

1:27

deluxeeditionnetworkcom Backslash

1:30

podcast of the month On

1:33

to today's episode . So

1:35

a few episodes back . I

1:38

was talking to my friend , lisa Mott-Wally , and

1:41

she said something during that show

1:43

that in hindsight

1:45

I should have called her on . I

1:48

should have made a comment on it , but I didn't

1:51

. And it's kind of been rattling around

1:53

in my brain ever since . She

1:55

said , and I'm paraphrasing here

1:57

being nice is not

1:59

the same thing as being kind

2:02

. And that statement

2:04

has kind of stuck with me because

2:06

I think a lot of

2:08

people tend to use the

2:11

two words interchangeably

2:13

. Right ? Isn't that

2:15

person nice ? Isn't that person kind ? It's

2:17

the same thing , isn't it ? But

2:20

apparently it's not . So

2:23

what's the difference between being

2:25

kind and being nice ? Aren't

2:28

they just two peas in the same overly

2:31

polite pod ? Well

2:33

, let's break it down . Kindness

2:36

is like a warm hug from

2:39

a grandma who smells like freshly

2:41

baked cookies . It's

2:43

genuine , heartfelt and

2:46

oftentimes selfless . You

2:48

know the kind of thing that makes you feel all

2:50

fuzzy inside . Imagine

2:53

you're stuck in traffic , you're late for

2:55

a meeting and someone lets you merge and

2:57

they give you a smile in a wave . That's

3:01

kindness . They didn't have

3:03

to do that . They gained nothing

3:05

from their actions , but they

3:07

did it anyway . Bless their

3:09

considerate little hearts . Niceness

3:15

, on the other hand , is like a

3:17

store-bought cupcake with

3:19

too much frosting . It looks sweet

3:21

, but underneath it's

3:24

just fluff . It's polite

3:26

, sure , but sometimes

3:29

it's about as deep as a kiddie pool . Picture

3:32

this You're at a party

3:34

and your neighbor , karen , compliments

3:37

your haircut . Now you've heard through

3:39

the grapevine that Karen actually doesn't

3:41

like your haircut . You

3:43

know that she secretly

3:45

thinks you look like a deranged poodle

3:48

. That's niceness

3:50

. Bless her passive-aggressive

3:52

heart . Okay

4:03

, so let's play a game . We'll

4:06

call it kind or nice , and

4:08

I'll give you scenarios and

4:10

you decide which one it is . First

4:13

scenario you're at work and

4:16

you accidentally spill coffee on your

4:18

shirt . Ugh , who hasn't been there ? Right

4:20

? Your boss smirks

4:22

and says well , that's

4:24

one way to accessorize . Or

4:28

a coworker hands you a

4:30

tissue and says no worries

4:32

, happens to the best of us . Okay

4:35

, which one of those reactions

4:37

was kind and which one was

4:39

nice ? Time's

4:51

up , okay , did you get it right ? The

4:54

coworker was being kind

4:56

, the boss was

4:58

being nice . Okay

5:01

, so we're going to be right back with our discussion after

5:03

this quick message from Casey

5:05

and Ray , the hosts of

5:07

the Deluxe Edition show . Take

5:10

it away , guys . Hey

5:14

, this is Casey Shearer and this is

5:16

Ray . Do you like

5:18

pop culture ? We're pretty sure

5:20

you do . Then come on

5:22

over and check us out at deluxeeditionshow

5:25

. You will

5:27

not be sorry , or

5:30

maybe you will be , I don't know . Trust

5:35

me you won't be Okay

5:37

. So here's another scenario for

5:39

you . Picture this You're

5:42

at the grocery store and

5:44

you notice that the cashier is having a rough

5:47

day . You kind of force

5:49

a grin and say , hey

5:51

, have a great day . Well

5:54

, mentally calculating how many items

5:56

you can get through the express line

5:58

. Or you

6:01

smile gently and ask how they're doing and

6:03

genuinely listen which

6:06

is kind and which is nice . Times

6:19

up , that forced

6:21

grin gave it away . That

6:24

version of you is being nice . But

6:27

the version that took the time to

6:29

ask how the cashier was doing and

6:31

genuinely listen to their response

6:34

was the kind version of

6:36

you . The

6:38

difference between being kind and being

6:41

nice oftentimes is

6:43

intent . If you do

6:45

something for someone with the expectation

6:48

of some sort of reward , whether

6:51

it's monetary or recognition

6:53

of some sort , you're being nice

6:56

, not kind . Imagine

6:59

you see a friend struggling with a heavy box

7:01

. Nice , you might

7:04

say , hey , you need a hand . But

7:06

kind , you dives in like

7:09

a superhero Biceps

7:11

bulging box slung over your shoulder

7:13

before your friend can even blink

7:15

. See the difference . One

7:18

is a pat on the back , the

7:20

other is a full-blown massage

7:23

. But

7:25

here's the rub Sometimes

7:28

the line between being nice and

7:31

kind gets blurrier

7:34

than a politician's campaign promises

7:36

. Take office parties

7:38

, for example . Nice , you

7:40

is the life of the party , cracking

7:43

jokes and making everyone feel included

7:46

. But kind you , yeah

7:49

, kind you is the one that's

7:51

checking on the shy intern in the corner

7:53

, making sure the vegan co-worker

7:55

doesn't starve and secretly

7:58

refilling the punch bowl with sparkling

8:00

water , because , well , let's

8:02

be real , nobody needs that

8:04

much eggnog . And that's

8:06

the kicker , isn't it ? Kindness

8:09

isn't always sunshine and rainbows

8:11

. It can be messy

8:13

, inconvenient and

8:15

even downright awkward . But

8:18

it's also where the real

8:20

magic happens , because

8:22

when you're not just playing the social game , you're

8:25

actually connecting with another

8:28

human being on a deeper level

8:30

. You're saying I

8:32

see you , I hear you and

8:35

I care about what matters

8:37

to you , and that my

8:40

friends is worth more

8:42

than any social media post praising

8:44

you or monetary reward

8:46

. Although

8:50

we tend to say well , aren't kind

8:53

people nice ? And nice people kind

8:55

? That's not always

8:57

the case . Sometimes

9:00

a person is nice but not

9:02

at all kind . And sometimes

9:04

a person is kind but

9:07

doesn't come off as very nice . Why

9:10

is that ? Well , it's

9:13

because nice is a social mask

9:15

. People use it to interact

9:17

with the world . Kindness

9:20

, on the other hand , is an act

9:22

of choice to pour positivity

9:24

into someone else who needs it

9:26

. That someone may be people

9:29

, but you could also look at it like

9:31

animals , a cause or

9:34

supporting charity . Kindness

9:37

strives to selflessly improve

9:39

the world , and we should also

9:41

mention that selflessly

9:44

is a commonly misinterpreted

9:46

word . To be selfless

9:48

is not to

9:50

be a martyr . Instead

9:53

, it's to act in a way

9:55

that considers others before

9:57

oneself , and that

9:59

can be something as simple as donating

10:01

money to charity , even if you're a bit

10:03

strapped for cash . It

10:06

could be helping a senior citizen load their groceries

10:08

into a car . A selfless

10:11

act may be picking up a stray kitten that

10:13

you spot on the side of the road , not

10:16

coincidentally . All of these things

10:18

are acts of selfless kindness

10:21

. They all put the needs of

10:23

others before your personal

10:25

needs , but plenty of

10:27

nice people wouldn't go out of their way for others

10:29

. They just act nice

10:31

and polite because

10:33

that's what society expects of

10:35

them . That

10:38

will just about wrap up this week's episode

10:40

. Friends , thank you for

10:43

your kindness . Listening to

10:45

this episode , I hope

10:47

you found something you can take away and

10:49

use in your life . We'll

10:52

be back next week with another episode , but

10:54

until then , be

10:57

that person who roots for others , who

10:59

tells a stranger they look amazing

11:02

and encourages others to

11:05

believe in themselves and

11:07

their dreams . You've been listening

11:09

to the Kindness Matters podcast and

11:11

I am your host , mike Ratbunt

11:14

. Have a fantastic

11:16

week .

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