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You are listening to the Life

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Coach School Podcast with Brooke Castillo,

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episode number Welcome

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to the Life Coach School Podcast,

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where it's all about real clients,

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real problems, and real

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coaching. And now your

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host, Master Coach Instructor, Brooke

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Castillo. Hey,

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beautiful friends. How

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are you? Are we

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coming out of the cold? Are we coming into

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spring? New season? New

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life? I have

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been coaching so much

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so far this year, all

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the time. Been doing

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lots of group coaching, lots

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of student coaching, really

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diving into some very deep work

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with a lot of people. And

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I just want to say that I think so many

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people are going through it right

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now, going through such

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hard times and

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as a world we're going through

1:01

very hard times with

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wars that are

1:06

creating atrocities that we then

1:08

have to get up and function during

1:10

a day, with diagnosis that

1:12

we're having to hear and

1:15

then take care of our kids, with

1:18

relationships ending and

1:21

with fraud and

1:23

with so much pain going

1:26

on. It seems

1:28

like in so many instances

1:30

that things are hopeless. And

1:33

then I also coach so many

1:35

people on success

1:38

and joy and new life

1:40

and new babies and new opportunities

1:43

and new creations.

1:47

And as a coach, it just

1:49

is like the full spectrum of

1:51

humanity that I experience on a

1:53

day to day, even within an hour call.

1:56

I can be coaching someone on the

1:58

deepest, darkest pain they're experiencing. experiencing and

2:00

then someone on their huge

2:03

joy of accomplishment or joy

2:05

of creation. And

2:07

it just makes me think about what

2:10

it is to be human. What it is

2:12

to just wake up and show

2:14

up in this life is

2:16

sometimes just a miracle that we can do

2:19

it. And sometimes

2:21

life presents us with opportunities

2:23

to literally experience miracles

2:26

and blow our own minds. As

2:29

a human, I kind of find it to

2:31

be jarring to go back

2:33

and forth with such extremes. I

2:36

tend to live a very intense

2:38

life. I have a very intense

2:40

personality. And so I feel like

2:42

sometimes I experience things on a

2:46

roller coaster ride. And

2:48

all of this to say that

2:50

I would answer the question, how

2:52

do I get through it? How

2:54

do I keep myself sane? How

2:57

do I continue to live

2:59

in a world that is such

3:01

that ours is in a way

3:03

that is balanced and allows

3:05

me to have some peace? And

3:08

I would say the one thing that

3:10

helps me more than anything

3:13

really is walking. I

3:16

have had a walking practice for

3:18

literally as long as I can remember. Being

3:21

able to get outside and go on

3:23

a walk every single day has literally

3:25

saved my life. I

3:27

will say that I think it's

3:29

very closely related to reading and

3:32

coaching because those are two things

3:34

that I do on my walks.

3:37

And so it's hard to separate them

3:39

out. It's hard to say which is

3:41

more important than walking, the reading, which

3:43

is listening to audiobooks and podcasts or

3:45

the coaching that I do. But

3:48

the three of them together are I think

3:51

a magical ingredient, a

3:53

magical recipe for more

3:57

peace and love and understanding in your own

3:59

life. And so if you don't

4:01

have a walking practice, I

4:03

highly recommend that you consider

4:06

starting one. I'm actually

4:09

thinking about late spring doing

4:11

a walking challenge.

4:14

One of my friends, Shileen Johnson, just

4:16

did a walking challenge with her community

4:19

and it was extraordinary watching all of

4:21

the success that people had and all

4:23

the fun that they had on that.

4:25

So I'm thinking about doing one with

4:27

you all later in the spring. And

4:30

what it would consist of is just

4:32

a practice of consistent walking for probably

4:34

30 days. And

4:36

for me, it's not just the walking,

4:38

it's the practice of the walk and

4:40

what we do on the walk and

4:42

how we do the walk. I

4:46

recently, as many of you know who are

4:48

watching behind the scenes in Scholars, know that

4:50

I had moved to Miami. I had sold

4:52

my place in Scottsville and I had moved

4:54

to a penthouse that I had bought years

4:56

before that had just been completed in

4:59

Miami. And it's really interesting

5:01

when I bought the place in

5:03

Miami, I was in a very different phase

5:05

of my life. Very different

5:07

energy, very different desires to, you

5:10

know, single, I wanted to go

5:12

out, wanted to have fun, wanted

5:14

to live in a penthouse, wanted to live in a city. And

5:17

by the time it was done, I was in a

5:19

very different place in my life. But

5:22

because the condo had appreciated so much, I

5:24

thought, hey, I'll move in to the condo

5:28

and live there for a year to adjust

5:30

for the capital gains profit that I would

5:32

make on it and also because it would

5:34

be a fun experience to live in Miami

5:36

for a year and to do all the

5:39

Miami things. So I know

5:41

that this is redundant for those of you who

5:43

are following along with this in Scholars. When

5:46

I got there, there was a chain

5:49

of events, let's say, that

5:51

were very comical that happened moving into

5:53

the place, getting the furniture that was

5:55

supposed to come with the place and

5:57

dealing with all of the mishaps and

5:59

craziness that can happen when you move

6:01

into a brand new place. And

6:04

one of the things that I

6:06

found the most challenging about being

6:08

in Miami, and I still do,

6:10

is that there really isn't a

6:12

place for me to walk where

6:14

I can go out my front

6:16

door and have a peaceful walk. I

6:19

live right on a very busy

6:21

road and so

6:23

if I go outside to go on a

6:25

walk, there's going to be tons of people,

6:27

tons of traffic. And I can walk down

6:29

that very busy street to a neighborhood where

6:32

I can walk and get some peace. And

6:34

there's also a place where I could get in a car

6:36

and drive to a park that's nearby and I can walk

6:38

in the park. I had thought

6:41

that I would be able to walk on the beach

6:43

and walking on the beach is actually

6:45

so good for your legs, for your

6:47

body, for your health. It's amazing. It's

6:50

beautiful on the beach. But what

6:52

was so interesting about it is I couldn't

6:55

coach myself or listen to books in

6:57

the same way because walking on the

6:59

beach requires much more concentration. And

7:02

so I wasn't getting the same mental

7:04

benefit that I would normally get from

7:06

my walk on just cement. I don't

7:08

walk really fast. I'm not very focused

7:10

on making sure I get a workout

7:13

or anything like that. I'm just walking

7:15

at kind of a meditative pace. And

7:17

so I found being on the beach and it was very

7:19

windy on the beach when I first moved there that there

7:21

was lots of distraction, you have to really pay attention. It

7:24

wasn't working for me. And

7:27

it was amazing to notice

7:29

how much that affected me

7:32

and affected my mental state to be

7:34

able to function at the highest level.

7:37

It's been very rare that I've ever

7:39

moved somewhere that I haven't really been

7:41

able to find peace without

7:43

having to coach myself a lot. And

7:47

Miami was one of those places. And so

7:49

I told my boyfriend, I was like, okay, this, I

7:51

don't think I can do this. I don't think I

7:53

want to do this. I don't need to live here.

7:56

I want to move somewhere. And initially

7:58

before this house had. completed

8:00

before they gave us 30 days notice that we were

8:02

going to close on the condo. We were looking at

8:05

places in San Diego. I think I talked to you

8:07

all about that. So I'm in

8:09

San Diego right now. We found a house

8:11

here. We made an offer on it. We're

8:13

right in the process of going into escrow

8:15

on a house here. And I will tell you,

8:18

we've been here for about a week now. And

8:20

the hiking, first of all, it's just

8:22

about spring in California. So the weather

8:24

is perfect. The hills are

8:26

green as green can be. It is

8:30

stunningly gorgeous here. And

8:32

the hiking is off the chain. I

8:35

just went for a two and a half hour

8:37

hike. And it doesn't even have to be a

8:39

hike. It can just be a walk. But there's

8:41

trails everywhere here. They're not very crowded. Beautiful views,

8:43

lots and lots and lots of peace. And

8:46

the amount of

8:48

motivation, the amount of

8:51

well being, the amount of fitness

8:53

I get just from being in

8:55

a place where I can walk

8:58

for a long period of time on

9:00

a trail without having to go in circles

9:03

and have peace is phenomenal.

9:07

And I've been telling Elijah, I'm just

9:09

like, this is everything for

9:11

me. And he really makes fun of me.

9:13

He was making fun of me the other

9:15

day because we were driving. I'm not a

9:18

very good driver. I think I've told you

9:20

all this that I'm just not a good

9:22

driver. I drive very slowly. I have this

9:24

very fancy Taycan Porsche. And

9:26

I drive it like a grandma. And my kids

9:28

die when I drive and I, you know,

9:30

it's I'm just not really good. And

9:33

Elijah was imitating me driving because I'm always

9:35

looking for a trail. I'm always like, Oh,

9:37

is that a trail? Oh, is that a trailhead?

9:39

Oh, my gosh, look, we could go hiking there. He's

9:41

like, you're always distracted by the trails when we're

9:43

trying to, you know, drive on a road. So

9:46

I'm always driving slow. I'm always looking to the

9:48

side. So he usually drives so I

9:50

can look for trails. And

9:52

there's nothing I love more than to like

9:55

find a new trail and to go explore it

9:57

and see like, where does this go? And is

9:59

there a view? and is there

10:01

water and are there people walking dogs?

10:03

It's like the best for me. And

10:06

so I want to make

10:08

sure that all of you know

10:10

how important a walking practice can

10:12

be and how much value it

10:14

can add to your life, like

10:16

truly. So the

10:18

deal for me is I'd like to wake up

10:20

in the morning, I like to have coffee and

10:22

then I like to put on my shoes and

10:25

go for a walk. Since this year

10:27

I've been working out and lifting weights a

10:29

lot, I usually have to debate whether I

10:31

lift weights before the hike or after. So

10:33

when I was in Florida, I would usually

10:35

go on a walk first because it would

10:37

warm up and get pretty hot towards the

10:39

mid morning and then I would go on

10:41

into my workout and also the gym is

10:43

less busy. But here I've been wanting to

10:45

go on much longer walks and so it

10:47

gives me when I do my workout before

10:50

I go on the long walk, then it

10:52

gives me freedom to just kind of like

10:54

relax and think. There's two ways that

10:56

I like to do a walk. One

10:58

of them is total silence

11:01

and if I have a lot of ideas going

11:03

on in my head, if I have

11:05

a lot of challenging problems I'm trying

11:07

to deal with, if I

11:09

have plans I'm trying to make, I just

11:12

go in silence and

11:14

I let my brain just dance around

11:16

and I let it kind of buzz

11:18

and like think and try to solve

11:21

problems and think through things. And

11:23

for the first maybe, I don't know, half

11:26

hour of the walk, I could be

11:28

taking notes on what's going on in

11:30

my brain or sending slack

11:32

messages to my team about things that need

11:34

to get done or things that I need

11:36

someone to follow through on or things to

11:38

remind me about, all those things. So it's

11:41

kind of like the first half hour is

11:43

really just unloading a thought download kind of

11:45

thing. And then I settle in and

11:47

I just let my brain just

11:50

rest on ideas

11:52

and dreams and desires

11:54

and peace. As

11:57

I have gotten older, if something happened

11:59

to me, when I turned 50

12:01

and a lot of women tell me

12:03

this that when they're in their late

12:05

40s early 50s something

12:08

shifts inside of them and

12:11

it really is that turning off

12:13

the noise of the outside world and

12:16

not caring as much

12:19

what people will think if I do something

12:21

or if I don't do something, what my

12:23

friends will think or what my parents will

12:25

think or what my kids will think or

12:27

whatever. It's much more of a deepening into

12:29

like true desire of what

12:31

you truly want and for

12:34

me, I've also had a huge shift and of

12:36

course I've talked about this on the podcast in

12:39

how my ambition feels and

12:42

the sense of completion that I have around

12:44

some things and then the sense of desire

12:46

and ambition I have about others has

12:49

really been interesting. So in

12:51

many ways, I feel like I'm kind

12:53

of getting to know this new version

12:55

of myself and so being able to

12:58

walk in silence and

13:00

eavesdrop on myself thinking

13:02

has been very enlightening.

13:04

I leave with a

13:06

curiosity about myself

13:10

and about my life and about what's

13:12

going on. If you can imagine, it's

13:14

kind of like going on a walk with a friend and

13:17

just letting them kind of chat into

13:19

the silence, right? Not filling the silence,

13:21

not interrupting them but just letting them

13:23

kind of talk and to

13:25

see what comes up and see as you

13:28

meander where it goes. There

13:30

are I would say out of

13:33

the seven day week, there are probably

13:36

two days of that week where I have

13:38

a silent walk and I have just

13:40

peace where I just listen to myself

13:43

and I always come back totally refreshed

13:45

physically but I also come back with

13:47

a deeper sense of myself, a deeper

13:49

intimacy with myself and kind of a

13:51

cleansed brain. I highly recommend

13:53

you try this. In the beginning, it might be

13:56

difficult for some of you to really

13:58

be able to tune in to... your

14:01

own brain and to do the download and

14:03

to find that quiet water underneath but I

14:05

highly recommend that you give it a try.

14:08

You try to find the silence

14:10

and the messaging and the

14:13

wisdom that you have underneath

14:15

the noise. I

14:17

highly recommend that you turn

14:19

off all notifications on your phone

14:21

unless you know maybe your kids

14:23

but all you know notifications about

14:25

any kind of work any kind of social

14:27

media anything that will drag you

14:30

away from yourself and

14:32

although you may want to have your phone with

14:34

you this silence is what brings it up.

14:36

I also recommend

14:38

that you don't listen to music.

14:41

Music gives your brain something to focus

14:43

on it gives your brain something to

14:45

do other than finding its own depth

14:49

and so this silence is really the answer and I

14:51

like to go on an hour and a half to

14:53

two-hour walk you don't have to go on that

14:56

longer block but I do find the longer

14:58

the walk the more I find out about

15:00

myself. So that's the silent walk.

15:02

The second kind of walk that I do and

15:04

I would I probably do this one two to three

15:07

times a week is the

15:09

girlfriend coaching chat walk and

15:11

I usually do this with

15:13

my best girlfriend Chris Placke

15:16

and I normally do not like talking

15:18

on the phone. I'm not one of

15:21

those people that people call

15:23

I'm not someone that calls

15:25

you but if I'm going on

15:27

a walk I'll call my friend

15:29

April or I'll call my friend Chris and we

15:31

will we can chat and we can talk

15:33

about life and we can talk about coaching

15:35

and we can help each other through some

15:37

stuff and we can share ideas and

15:40

we do it for as long as feels

15:42

right and many times we're often

15:44

like oh we should record these calls they're

15:47

so good and sometimes we're laughing hysterically and

15:49

sometimes we're dealing with family things and it's

15:51

kind of my chance to

15:53

be really intimate with another woman in

15:55

a deep friendship

15:58

and have very deep conversations. and

16:01

a conversation on a walk I do

16:03

feel like brings up a different kind

16:05

of conversation than one that doesn't. We

16:08

also do this when we're together. Chris is

16:10

coming into town for a week to spend

16:12

a week with me and we're going to

16:15

work and play and hike. And

16:17

I love going on a walk

16:19

with another human, another friend, another

16:21

person. It's a great way to

16:23

get to know each other on

16:25

a deeper level and so I

16:27

highly recommend doing that. I've mentioned

16:29

my friend Shalene like we've been going

16:31

on walks together. It's so cool to

16:33

go on a walk especially when a

16:36

lot of the times you might get together. It would be

16:38

with your partners like going out to dinner

16:40

in social gatherings to just have, you know,

16:42

the two girls on a walk for me

16:45

is a very nourishing thing. It's a very

16:47

nourishing experience. So I do that on the

16:49

phone with Chris mostly but I highly recommend

16:51

that you grab a friend and go on

16:53

a walk especially one that you want to get

16:55

to know better. You want to stay connected to.

16:58

You want to love harder so to speak.

17:01

My mom and I like to go on walks. She loves

17:03

to hike too and so we love to go on walks

17:05

together and catch up and talk. It's very fun. The

17:08

other type of walk that I like

17:10

to do and this I would say are

17:13

the fills in the gaps of the other

17:15

days is listening to

17:17

audio books and podcasts. I

17:20

like to listen to

17:22

educational inspiring thought provoking

17:24

material. I will listen

17:27

to business books,

17:29

marketing books. I will

17:31

listen to self help books. I

17:33

will listen to financial books. I'm

17:37

recently very interested

17:40

in real estate, real estate investing and

17:42

real estate books and when my brain gets excited

17:44

about something it just wants more and more and

17:46

more. It just gets for gracious about it and

17:48

so I've been listening to a lot of that

17:50

and I will tell you when I go on

17:52

these walks and I'm listening to these books,

17:55

I usually have to stop and take notes

17:57

and I just take notes in my audio

17:59

notes. app or

18:01

I type it into a regular app or

18:03

into the regular note app or I send

18:06

myself an email if that's something that I

18:08

really want to pay attention to right away.

18:10

I don't know if you all

18:12

know this but there's also a way to send

18:14

yourself a message in Slack. So

18:16

if it's a business item that I

18:19

need to like take care of, I send

18:21

myself a message in Slack to remind myself.

18:23

If it's like an idea that I have for you know

18:25

a sales page or an idea that I have for a

18:27

podcast or an idea I have for one of my classes,

18:30

I'll put it in there. So as

18:32

you can see, these are like two

18:34

hours where I'm spending out

18:37

in nature getting amazing

18:39

fresh air, getting a scenery

18:42

like especially when you're traveling, you get

18:44

to see like parts of

18:46

the countryside, parts of the city,

18:48

parts of the spaces that you're in

18:51

that you otherwise wouldn't see.

18:54

And occasionally like I was on a walk yesterday,

18:56

occasionally you'll see a little animal, I'm not really

18:58

sure what it is. Looks kind

19:00

of scary. Like is it

19:02

a mountain lion? Is it a bobcat?

19:04

Not sure, gonna walk the other way. I

19:07

often get lost on my hikes and

19:09

thank God for GPS that like helps

19:11

me find my car again because

19:14

I get lost. But those are some of the

19:16

best walks that I've ever been on. And when

19:18

you have time to go on a

19:20

walk, like if I have a day off and

19:22

I can just go and I don't have to

19:25

put a time limit on my walk, when I

19:27

get back, I am truly like depleted physically. I'm

19:29

usually starving for food. I'm like, I can't wait

19:31

to eat. I want some more water

19:33

and I want to lay down. And for me, that's

19:35

like the best feeling ever. It's

19:37

like to use yourself up. Walking

19:40

is one of the best

19:42

ways to maintain your

19:44

weight, to maintain your health,

19:47

to maintain your sanity. And

19:50

I have shared my walking

19:52

practice with many of you and many of

19:54

you have told me that you started walking

19:56

because I had talked about it because I

19:59

talked about how great it was. was. And

20:01

I couldn't believe it when I heard

20:03

like Shaleen was talking about when she did her

20:05

walking challenge that someone had lost. I think it

20:07

was just in one month had lost 25

20:10

pounds from just going outside and walking every

20:12

day. And this was someone that was trying

20:14

to diet and go on crazy fast and

20:16

you know, to work out in the gym

20:18

like a crazy person and really they just

20:20

needed to be able to walk and

20:22

to go outside and walk in a way where you're

20:25

just taking care of yourself feels very different. So sometimes

20:27

they'll go on a walk with someone and they want

20:29

to walk really fast because they want to get into

20:31

some certain zone or they want to get their heart

20:33

rate up or whatever. I don't ever

20:35

try and do any of that. I just

20:37

go out and make sure I'm enjoying it

20:39

and I go for distance over speed. I'm

20:42

definitely the tortoise when it comes to

20:44

walking and I'm very fit so

20:46

I can walk up very steep hills with

20:48

no problem. I don't like really lose my

20:51

breath. So you know, I maintain a good

20:53

cadence and I get I would say a

20:55

good workout but not because I'm pushing so

20:57

hard during the walk. It's because I'm walking

21:00

for a long time. And

21:02

when you have these opportunities for

21:04

yourself and you go

21:07

out and you have you know, these silent

21:09

walks or this time with your girlfriends or

21:11

for me when I'm listening to an audiobook,

21:14

it really feels like I'm having a relationship

21:16

with the person or the

21:18

podcast like I feel like I

21:20

know many of you have said this to you like you

21:22

go on walks with me all the time and you feel

21:24

like you know, we're friends and we're going on walks and

21:26

that's totally how I feel too and I go on a

21:28

walk and sometimes every once in a while listen to

21:31

my own podcast especially because I have so

21:33

many older ones that I need to like

21:35

review for things and it's really a trip

21:37

to go on a walk and listen to

21:39

yourself on a podcast yourself years ago on

21:41

a podcast to kind of you know, think

21:43

about that relationship with yourself is really cool

21:46

but I will notice if

21:49

I don't have a walk on

21:51

a day or if I miss

21:53

a couple of days in a row, I

21:55

do notice how that affects how

21:58

I am with myself. how

22:00

I am with other people and how I show up in

22:02

the world. Going on a

22:04

walk and getting away from your

22:07

computer, getting away from social media,

22:09

getting away from the constant requests

22:11

and questions and to-do lists is

22:14

a gift you can give yourself. And

22:17

so, if you haven't started doing

22:19

it, I recommend you try. Go out

22:21

and try a silent walk. Go

22:24

out and try an audiobook walk.

22:26

Go out and try a friendship

22:28

talk walk. Maybe

22:30

go out and try a podcast walk.

22:32

Maybe even from now on, once a

22:34

week, whenever you listen to my podcast,

22:36

it's on a walk. I used to

22:38

do this with like People magazine. I

22:40

used to love People magazine. I'd

22:43

only let myself read it when I was on

22:45

one of those exercise bikes. And so, I'd sit

22:47

on the exercise bike for an hour and read

22:49

through my People magazine that I used to love

22:51

so much. But it's one of those things where

22:53

it's like you can look forward to a

22:55

walk and a podcast. Whenever I have a

22:57

really good audiobook I can't wait to listen

22:59

to, it's like I can't wait

23:01

to get on that walk. I can't wait to

23:03

listen to that book. That's what's going on for

23:06

me right now. I have this amazing financial

23:08

book that I'm listening to as I prepare

23:10

for some financial classes that I'm teaching inside

23:12

of scholars. And it's so good

23:15

and it has such unique approaches to

23:17

wealth and finance that I

23:19

cannot wait to get out and get an

23:21

hour worth of a walk listening to that. As

23:24

a side note, I also listen to audiobooks when

23:26

I'm working out, when I'm lifting. I like

23:28

to just have my brain be able to

23:31

focus on something cerebral while I'm trying to

23:33

lift those huge weights. You know that I

23:35

don't enjoy a workout but I always enjoy

23:37

an audiobook. So, if I have a good

23:39

audiobook or podcast on, I can enjoy that

23:42

part until the workout is over. So, that's

23:44

just a pro tip for those of you

23:46

who don't like to lift weights. By the

23:48

way, I have not missed a day of

23:50

lifting weights. I lift weights five days a

23:52

week. I have not missed a day since

23:55

I started at the beginning of

23:57

this year and I feel

23:59

amazing. I feel strong. I think I told

24:01

you the other day I got lost

24:03

on a hike and I had to

24:05

hike up this huge hill to get

24:07

to safety basically and my

24:09

legs were so strong because I've been

24:11

lifting so heavy and so much. So

24:14

combining a little weight training with a

24:16

little bit of walking when

24:19

you're over 50 I think is the answer. So

24:22

start a walking practice my

24:24

friends. Please enjoy and

24:26

I will talk to you next week. Take

24:29

care. Bye bye. Hey

24:31

if you've ever wanted to work

24:33

with me as your coach now

24:36

is the time to do it.

24:39

You can join me

24:41

and get coached in

24:44

scholars by going to

24:46

the lifecoachschool.com/join. This

24:49

is going to be the

24:51

best year ever. It's

24:54

your turn to change your life.