Hello everyone and welcome back to The Mindset Evolution Show. Your #1 source for Professional and Personal Mindset Development.

We all go through difficult times in our lives. Whether it's personal or professional life problems happen. However, you can choose to wallow in your self pity or you can go forward. Because no matter how bad it might seem to you, it's never as bad as it seems and you WILL come through stronger and more resilient. 

I want to share with you some personal struggles I have been going through recently. What keeps me forging ahead? My Mindset.

It was the beginning of April 2021. I was traveling to Arizona to spend a long weekend with my extended family. Many of my aunts, uncles and cousins have migrated to Arizona over the years from Illinois, and I was looking forward to catching up and playing some golf. 

As my wife drove me to The Denver International Airport we said little to each other as I was lost in thought. When we arrived at the terminal, we both embraced, kissed, and said we loved each other.  As I walked away, I watched my wife wave and I waved back as I stepped into the terminal.

I didn’t realize that moment was going to be the last time we would embrace and tell each other we loved each other. If I would have known this, I would have held her longer and gotten back in her car.

When I landed in Phoenix my older sister and cousin were there to pick me up. As we drove towards Fountain Hills (Near Scottsdale), I caught them up with family news from my end and I let them know that my wife was doing fine, and she sent her love. 

I had a great time in Arizona. I caught up with extended family, played golf and hung out at the pool. It was just what I needed. 

The day before I was going to head back to Denver, my wife texted me and I asked if I could spend a couple more days in Arizona because she was enjoying the time alone and she needed time to think about things going forward, including our marriage. She also indicated the possibility of some marriage counseling going forward.

I was stunned.

I didn’t know where this was coming from. Sure, we had problems. What marriage doesn’t? My wife had to think about our marriage? We can get through anything and have, I thought to myself, but I didn’t believe we needed any counseling. Then it hit me. My wife wanted marriage counseling at the beginning of 2021. It was a very tough holiday season (2020) to say the least and our families had been through a lot. I refused marriage counseling because I was always the guy who pushed things way down, a skill I learned in the military and from a long career in law enforcement. And I never liked talking about family problems, marital problems, and MY problems out in the open with other people.

Talk about unhealthy.

Plus, there weren’t any signs our marriage was in serious trouble.

Uh huh…Sure there was. I just chose to ignore them most of the time.  A lot of people are conditioned to ignore the personal, professional problems or both. It is the proverbial 800lb Gorilla in the room. We all hope it goes away on its own. Here is some advice – It never does. If anything, it gets bigger.

My wife and I talked a couple of times while I was still in Arizona, and I told her I would be open to marriage counseling. I learned some time ago that marriage is its own identity, and it can be likened to a small child. If you don’t nurture, teach, and feed the child, it won’t grow up to be happy and successful. 

It was time for counseling.

Listen to the episode for more =)