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Hey everyone, hope you've had a nice

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Christmas. There's just a

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few days left of 2023

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now, time for many of us to

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reflect on the New Year's resolutions

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we considered 52 weeks

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ago and wonder if we need to make the same

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ones again. New

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Year's resolutions can be a great metaphorical

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motivational line in the sand for

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some people, but do remember

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it is a metaphorical line.

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There was no starting block and there isn't

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a real deadline to it. Now,

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if knowing that the end of the year is here gives

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you some motivational push to make 2024

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more successful in some regard than 2023

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and help you, then obviously that's

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brilliant. But if the size of

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the thing you wanted to achieve when

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you set the resolution in January still

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paralyzes you now, because it's too

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overwhelming, but that's not

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so brilliant. And it would be a good idea

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to maybe change the goalposts for

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2024 and

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find a better perspective on it. Because

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maybe the books you said you were going

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to read, the friends you were

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going to reconnect with, or the

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health or lifestyle changes you said at

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the start of the year were going to happen

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by the end. Maybe

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they don't have to be completed all in

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a year, after all. Maybe you

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just said that because

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it's some socially constructed nonsense.

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Well, if it was you that

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set the goalposts, then

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it's up to you to be able to move the goalposts.

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The thing about these self imposed

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things, though, is that being in control

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also means that we're ultimately responsible

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for whether we achieve them or not, and that's something

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that needs looking at. That's where

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there might be a perspective shift needed.

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An acceptance that goals

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need to change, but

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that our intentions were good in the first place.

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That we're not a useless piece of crap for

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moving the goalposts. We're just being realistic,

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given that it's pretty much January again,

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and last year's resolutions fell away. So

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whatever we did last year that led to

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us not achieving our goal was

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wrong. Maybe we

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set that bar too high, so bring

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it down a bit, or a lot.

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What can so often happen is that the frustration

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of having not achieved something yet stops

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us from getting motivated to get started

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on it. And if that's the case for you,

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no matter what your goals were, changing

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job, learning something new,

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rekindling something old, whatever it is,

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if you want to get started now,

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you need to let go of the shame of having

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not achieved it in the first place, so as

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to feel some excitement for it again.

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Because there was excitement

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about it when you first set that goal.

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So you're capable of feeling it. Well,

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see if you can get that feeling back.

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Go back in your mind to the

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reasons why you set that

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goal. Right at the start of it you thought

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about some sort of difference

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that achieving it would make to your life.

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Something pleasurable, something valuable,

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something that would make it worthwhile. Well,

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think about the difference

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in your life, because that is

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your motivation. Whatever gains

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in your life that that goal would create,

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that's your motivation and it still

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can be a year later. So think

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about it. What would that end

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goal bring you? Even if it's

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just a relief that it brings you,

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think about that and

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then think about the steps

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you need to take. Not just the end

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goal, but that first step

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to making that end goal happen. So

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if you want to change your job, which doesn't

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happen by itself, does it? There are steps

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in place. But you need the

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motivation to take that first step.

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Or rather, it's the first step that

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then creates The motivation,

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the movement, the feeling of being motivated

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doesn't come without desire though,

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a need. And that doesn't

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come without something positive in the end

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result. So think about that,

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and even if step one of a dozen

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steps takes a month, well

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so be it. Let it take a whole year if it has

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to, or two, or ten. The

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end goal can stay the same. And

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your focusing on the next step

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can change every month or

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two if it has to. If you do

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that, then the motivation doesn't dip

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and your self esteem can rise. Right

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then, I need to record January's episode

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now, ready for Monday. And it'll follow on from

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this quite nicely because it's going to be about

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self sabotage. Have a great weekend,

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everybody, and I will speak to you soon.

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Love ya, bye!