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1:22

Welcome to the science

1:24

of success. Introducing your

1:26

how much borderline. Doctor.

1:31

Ridge walk into the science of success!

1:33

Matt thank you for have me big

1:35

fan of the podcast. Am excited to

1:37

be here and challenge and give value

1:39

to your entrepreneurs possible. It's really good

1:42

to have you on here. And

1:44

I'm excited because I think the topic that

1:46

you talk about it so simple, but it's

1:48

really powerful to right. And it's something that

1:50

a lot of people probably. Don't.

1:52

Pay attention to or don't really think about

1:54

especially in a business context. And to me

1:56

it's a really we were talking in a

1:58

in a pre show about. this idea of

2:00

like finding every single edge, right? Even if

2:03

it's a quarter point, almost that classic sort

2:05

of example of the aggregation of marginal gains,

2:08

every single small advantage can stack up over time.

2:10

And I think this is an advantage that a

2:12

lot of people don't understand and don't think about,

2:14

which we'll share with this big secret advantages here

2:16

in a second. But for folks who aren't familiar

2:18

with you, Dr. Rich, tell us a little bit

2:20

about your story and kind of how you came

2:22

upon this revolutionary strategy. Yeah, thank

2:25

you very much for the intro. So, so

2:27

I'm a facial plastic surgeon. And when I

2:29

got out of medical school, I had my

2:31

passion, we were in the emergency room treating

2:33

these trauma victims that were just unrecognizable. And

2:36

when we would take care of them, and our job

2:38

was to put them back together, they all told

2:40

us the same thing. They were so

2:43

grateful that they could look normal,

2:45

that they could look like themselves again. And

2:47

it just touched me, I was hooked, I

2:49

wanted to be a part of this artistry

2:51

of analyzing the face, treating the face and

2:53

helping people when they really needed it the

2:55

most. So I became a facial plastic surgeon.

2:58

And as I built my business, I discovered you

3:00

may hear many physicians get out there and start

3:02

their business and they don't know how to run

3:05

business. So I had to figure it out for

3:07

myself. So we got busy. I love seeing my

3:09

patients confidence. We had a lot of word of

3:11

mouth referrals, we started doing some marketing. But I

3:14

ran into my business manager one day, and

3:16

we were shifts passing the night I saw him in

3:18

the hallway, I thought one of his family members had

3:20

died. And I pulled him in the room, I said,

3:22

What's going on? Are we okay? He says, Well, I

3:24

think we're gonna have to file for bankruptcy. What

3:26

are you talking about? Like we're busy. I

3:29

felt overworked, I needed a vacation. And

3:31

we were making a lot of money, but we

3:33

were spending even more. And I was not accountable

3:36

to the business part of it. So I'm like,

3:38

so I had to figure this out. I had

3:40

to own up to it. So I started getting

3:42

business mentors, studying business, things like you know, what

3:44

you're doing, science and success. And I started figuring

3:46

out the business, but to team morale was awful.

3:50

And I had to figure that out. I'm like, what

3:52

can I do? And then I had this revelation,

3:55

I said, Okay, wait a minute, I like to

3:57

smile. I like to be funny. I'm gonna start

3:59

smiling. anymore around the office and get people to smile

4:01

more and if we smile more, everybody's morale will boost up.

4:03

It's going to be great." And it was just so excited

4:05

to share this with my team. I brought them into the

4:08

room. I told them all of this and

4:10

I was pumped up about this and I

4:12

discovered that when you tell people that

4:14

they need to smile more, they won't do it.

4:16

In fact, they resent being told to

4:19

smile. They're like, don't tell me to fake smile.

4:21

It's bogus. It's baloney. It's

4:23

fake. So I had to get

4:25

them... How could I get them to smile? You can only bring

4:27

so much chocolate to the office, right? And

4:29

we would put the mirrors up so people smile and dial and

4:31

they use them a little bit. They

4:33

would see their flat face and then they would just get on the

4:35

phone and be nicer. But they pushed the mirrors to the side. There

4:38

was only one way that I could

4:41

get them to smile. I had

4:44

to show up and I had to smile. And I

4:46

was stressed and I was frustrated and I

4:48

felt so burned out but I would still show

4:50

up and I'm like, okay, guys, here we go.

4:52

Whoa, look at this schedule. It's a busy day.

4:54

Thank you guys so much. I know there's a

4:56

lot of work there. And these patients, they love

4:59

having our treatments and you guys love taking care

5:01

of our office. It's going to be a big

5:03

party today. And even though they may have been

5:05

laughing at me, I didn't care. They

5:08

were still smiling. And they

5:10

started to appreciate that I was making

5:12

the effort and everybody wants to have

5:14

a nice work environment. And I persisted

5:16

and slowly, you know, attitude started picking

5:18

up when I would show up and be happy.

5:21

They appreciate it and it worked when I showed

5:23

up to do it. Now, I had some staff

5:26

members that no matter how much we coached them

5:28

and they still wouldn't smile. One

5:30

in particular and it was someone I really loved. I

5:32

helped them get through nursing school and they would say,

5:34

well, I fake it in front of the patients but

5:37

you can never really fake it, right? If

5:39

you fake it, you know, you can always tell.

5:42

So I pulled this person aside. I said, listen,

5:44

I'm not going to fire you but you

5:46

just can't work here anymore because

5:48

you never smile. You're not happy

5:50

here. If you can't be happy here, you got to go find

5:52

some place. You can be happy. And

5:55

they did leave and it was, you know,

5:57

difficult because turnover and you got to retrain

5:59

someone. but this weight was

6:01

lifted off my chest. It was

6:04

just like, wow, you didn't

6:06

realize it could actually be this good. And

6:08

so when I went through this in my

6:10

business and then when morale and attitude goes

6:12

up, business started perking up and we're honored

6:14

to be leaders in our industry. We train

6:17

doctors nationally on how we do our business

6:19

practices. So I said, I got to quantify

6:21

this. How do I bottle this up and

6:23

give this to other doctors and other entrepreneurs?

6:25

So that's where I created my

6:28

smile score. You can actually quantify and measure.

6:30

I used all of my 4,000 face

6:32

lifting procedures, 20,000 syringe of

6:34

facial fillers injections and I've looked at tens

6:37

of thousands of faces and facial analysis

6:39

and it cues you in to emotional

6:43

signals, emotional intelligence and are you making

6:45

people happy? In our business, every business

6:47

is you got to make someone happy.

6:50

How do you know if you make someone happy? If

6:52

your product brings a smile to your customer's face, you're

6:55

heading in the right direction. So I put together

6:57

this little, let me bring this over here and

6:59

I'll give you the graphic so you can show

7:02

this here. But this is our, we put together

7:04

the smile score. Now here's where this is really

7:06

powerful, right? So everybody has a smile score. Some

7:09

people, they smile no matter what happens to them. Well,

7:12

I guess I got a flat tire. Some

7:14

people, no matter what happens to

7:16

them, they never smile. So

7:18

I use physicians, right? In

7:20

medicine, depending on which area

7:23

of medicine you're in, doctors are often low

7:25

or middle smilers. Now I'll talk to people and they say,

7:27

well, you know, my doctor's a high

7:29

smiler but there's a lot that are middle or low.

7:32

So what's your experience been, Matt, with physicians you've

7:34

interacted with? I'm curious, have you found them to

7:36

be high, middle or low smilers? What's your experience?

7:39

Most are like middle to low would be my

7:42

other than you. I don't think of most physicians

7:44

that are active at being like bubbly and smiling

7:46

all the time, right? I do have a couple

7:49

for sure but most of them I think are more serious

7:51

and like kind of reserved. Right

7:54

and that's a traditional thing, that's an old-fashioned

7:56

thing and there's certainly a place for seriousness

7:59

in medicine. But 99.5% of medicine is not, it's outpatient. It's

8:04

not like you're dying, it's not a

8:06

femur fracture. So here's an interesting question.

8:09

Where do patients like to see their

8:11

doctor for the best customer service or

8:14

the best patient experience? Do they like

8:16

serious, middle of the road or high?

8:18

Now patients don't want the silly doctor.

8:21

Hey, Matt, why are you doing? Like that's not

8:23

what it's about. But if I come into the

8:25

room and say, Matt, so good to see you.

8:27

Hey, we got your lab test. We're gonna take

8:29

great care of you. If you believe your doctor

8:31

likes you, you feel they're gonna do a

8:33

better job. The number one

8:36

determinant of patient compliance is, do

8:38

you like your doctor? And

8:40

guess which doctors are more likable, right?

8:43

The ones who smile more. The ones who

8:45

smile more. Guess which doctors get higher survey

8:47

scores? The ones who smile

8:49

more. Now by the way, doctors, we're healers.

8:52

Entrepreneurs are healers, right?

8:55

Do you heal people's business wounds? If

8:58

you have an apartment building, are you healing people's,

9:00

they need a space. They need a place to

9:02

live. You're healing that wound. You can consider anyone

9:04

to be a healer. If you're a janitor, whatever

9:07

your service is in business, when you are serving,

9:09

people feel you're gonna do a better job if they

9:11

think you like them. And by

9:13

the way, the more you smile around

9:16

your patient, you actually do like them

9:18

more. It's diagnostic and therapeutic. Now there's

9:20

tons of research to back this up.

9:22

There are studies to show that when

9:24

we smile more, our pain tolerance is

9:27

higher. We can tolerate pain. Now in

9:29

the workplace, entrepreneurs in business, we have

9:31

many painful situations. Would that be helpful

9:33

if you or your team could tolerate

9:35

more pain? Would that be helpful? Sure.

9:38

Always. There's data to

9:40

show when you're a higher smiler, you

9:43

will stay married longer. Would that

9:45

be helpful if you're in a long-term relationship to

9:48

stay married? Right, some people say no,

9:50

not for me, right? When we get into a

9:52

long-term relationship, we wanna stay, whether

9:54

it's a marriage, a personal relationship, or a

9:56

long-term business relationship. Good businesses are in it

9:59

for the long-term. your business relationships

10:01

will last longer when you create more smiles and

10:03

when you're bringing more smiles to the table and

10:06

this is gonna blow you away. There's

10:08

data to show we live

10:11

longer when we smile more. They

10:14

did a study on baseball players so they

10:16

had their baseball cards this is in the 50s

10:18

and they would have you know the

10:20

players would be there with their bat and you know serious and

10:22

like a little smile you know and

10:24

then to some of the guys are there you

10:27

know the big smile like hey like this they

10:29

broke them out in those three categories low smile

10:31

no smile medium and big

10:33

smile the people who smiled the biggest

10:36

they lived an average of seven years

10:38

longer. That's wild. There's

10:42

data out there and it's intuitive right

10:44

when you feel better people

10:46

treat you better more things go your way

10:48

it's just that constant stress of never smiling

10:51

it gives you heart disease right so these

10:53

are intuitive but a lot of people don't

10:55

get it. So let me ask you a

10:57

question have you ever met any business people

10:59

that take themselves a little too seriously? Certainly

11:01

yeah. To

11:06

their detriment does it hurt them

11:08

if they're too serious? I think generally yeah

11:10

I mean I mean similar to medicine probably I

11:12

think there's contexts where you want to be serious.

11:15

Yes. But I think there's a lot of contexts where

11:17

folks being more

11:19

serious probably hampers them in their pursuit of

11:21

whatever they're trying to achieve. Absolutely.

11:23

So let's take as an example in medicine there are

11:26

times when you need to be serious in business there's

11:28

times you need to be serious right. So let me

11:30

give you the medicine example where you should be serious

11:32

if you got to give someone a cancer diagnosis which

11:34

you know fortunately my practice we have a lot of

11:36

happy medicine but I have patients come to me all

11:39

the time telling me they've got terminal they say doctor

11:41

I've got a year to live and I just want

11:43

to do a treatment make myself feel good. I'm like

11:45

crying in the office when I see a patient like

11:47

that first of all I'm like oh my god I'm

11:49

so sorry that happened and then I put my brain

11:52

on and say okay how can I help you

11:54

what supports you need do you need this doctor

11:56

do you need this physical therapy which specialist do

11:58

you need because it's difficult to navigate medicine. So

12:00

then I'm not all smiles at that moment.

12:02

I'm like, let's get this, let's get

12:04

a plan. Once we have a plan, then

12:06

we say, okay, we got this plan, how's that feel? Is that

12:08

good for you? Then when we're

12:10

done with that, then you say, okay, well, it's

12:13

my honor to be your doctor. I

12:16

look forward to seeing you soon. I give him a hug, I

12:18

hug my knees. I give him a hug and that's where the

12:20

smile comes in. Because we care

12:22

about them, you wanna show that to them. And healing

12:25

is a feeling. And

12:27

when you do that in medicine, if

12:29

you don't smile, the patient's just gonna walk

12:31

out flat, feel emotionally dead,

12:34

that's not the right way to do it.

12:36

Now take that to business. If

12:38

you have a high-stakes serious business thing going on,

12:41

you're either gonna have an adversarial relationship or

12:43

you're gonna have a relationship

12:45

that you have mutual respect and you care

12:47

about that person. Now most people today, certainly you

12:50

can run and gun and be adversarial in

12:52

business. And if that's what you wanna do, that's

12:54

great. But if you want long-term business, it's nice

12:56

to have people that you love and do

12:58

long-term business with. So even when you have serious

13:00

conversations, you wanna bring in, say, you know,

13:02

look, Matt, I know this was a tough

13:04

deal and we're gonna make this concession

13:07

here and you do that. I really appreciate

13:09

that and I look forward to doing business

13:11

with you long-term. Because business is about relationships.

13:14

It's about people. So are

13:16

you too serious, right? How do you know, right? We

13:19

set the tone for me. I

13:22

don't wanna let anybody take my

13:24

smile away, right? That's me, that's my personal

13:26

happiness. And when I interact

13:28

with my team members, it lifts

13:30

them up. And every entrepreneur, you gotta

13:32

work with the team. You gotta be a leader,

13:34

you gotta lift them up. So if

13:36

you are aware of the smile score and you

13:38

use it, this is your advantage. If you're ignorant

13:41

of the smile score, you're gonna burn out your

13:43

staff, you're gonna burn out yourself. So

13:45

that's the foundation of what we do.

13:48

And I have some people who

13:50

are the skeptics out there who are like, I'm not so sure.

13:53

They tend to be the lower smilers. Is

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survey and select our show in the drop down

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menu that follows. But

15:23

there's an intuitiveness to this. And

15:25

if you're a skeptic in the smile score, just ask people

15:28

to rate you what level smile score do they think

15:30

you are and what level should you be to be

15:32

most effective. Well, I don't need

15:34

that. That's meaningless. I get my

15:37

job done. Well, okay, that's fine. Listen,

15:39

it doesn't work for everybody. There's

15:41

always some people it's just not going to

15:43

work for. That's fine. But

15:45

people are heading in this direction. And if I can

15:48

take a step further, our world

15:50

needs healing. I mean, when you

15:52

read the news and all that we live such a

15:54

privileged life, we can start

15:56

to healing by healing ourselves. So

15:59

this is just. just for me to keep my

16:01

own sanity, right? I love life. I love being

16:03

alive. I love taking on my business and treating

16:06

my patients and helping my team members grow. This

16:09

guides me every day. I

16:11

want to unpack more of the smile score and some

16:13

of the science behind smiling. I mean,

16:16

you've already demonstrated it's a pretty powerful thing that

16:18

a lot of people probably take for granted or

16:20

don't pay attention to, which I think is really

16:22

interesting. But before we even get

16:24

there, you mentioned a few things earlier that

16:27

I'd like to understand better or explore related

16:29

to smiling, but also I think would just

16:31

be interesting to kind of get your perspective

16:33

on. So one would be you talked

16:35

about, especially early on in your

16:38

journey about smiling and bringing smiles to the

16:40

office, that you had to put a smile

16:42

on your face, even if you were feeling

16:44

super stressed, super burned out. Walk

16:46

me through how you think about doing

16:48

that, because I certainly feel that

16:51

way a lot of days where

16:53

it's very stressful, lots of challenges,

16:56

and it's hard sometimes to pick yourself

16:58

up and slap on a smile. How do you

17:00

think about that internal struggle?

17:03

How do you motivate yourself or maybe motivation

17:05

is the wrong word for it, but how

17:07

do you think about staying positive, keeping a

17:09

smile on both metaphorically, but also

17:12

actually when you are very

17:14

stressed and burned out? Yeah,

17:16

that's a great question. And

17:19

I spend a lot of time working to

17:21

fortify myself and build positive energy. So

17:23

the foundation of me being able to

17:25

smile when I do not want to

17:28

is I don't give a damn

17:30

what people think about me. And I welcome

17:32

you and the listeners to say that. By the way,

17:34

if you don't give a damn, pardon

17:37

the curse words, but don't give a damn

17:39

what people think about you. I mean, we

17:41

care to a degree because we want to be ethical

17:43

and do well by others, and I always

17:45

follow the rules and don't break the laws. But

17:47

I don't care if people think that I'm dumb or arrogant.

17:50

I don't care what people think about me. They

17:52

can see me for who I am. So when I

17:54

say, now I'm going to demonstrate that physically, right? If

17:56

I really don't care what people think about me? I

18:01

can do whatever I want and it's silly.

18:03

Now you can use your body and

18:06

it changes you up. So this morning

18:08

I got into my pool is 61

18:10

degrees. So let's say I'm having

18:12

a day like I don't feel like smiling. When I

18:14

get into that pool, I can't think

18:17

about anything else. I'm like oh, I'm

18:19

swimming around and it like shocks my system. Okay.

18:22

We all have the self talk. Whatever we're

18:24

thinking about talking about whether you find out what

18:26

makes you smile. That's what you

18:28

do. Whether it's singing, dancing, listening to your

18:30

great music, you know, whatever you like to

18:33

do. Moving your body is very powerful.

18:35

Now we have a lot of cultural restrictions. If

18:37

you move your body too much, if you're out

18:39

in public and you start doing like

18:41

this, people are like whoa, whoa, what's going on?

18:43

Like there's a lot of rules and

18:45

we punish people socially. We give them the look. They're

18:47

like whoa, like it's bad. You're not

18:49

harming anyone. But what I'm doing is I'm trying

18:52

to talk to my brain. My

18:54

self talk is going, my, the only reason I don't

18:56

feel like smiling is because my self talk. If I'm

18:58

present in the moment, oh wow,

19:00

look at this beautiful, I got this building over

19:02

my head. I get to talk here with Matt

19:04

Bodner and we're technology brings us so

19:06

close. Oh my gosh. Just being present makes

19:09

you smile. The smile score is a tool to

19:11

make you more present. So what

19:13

do I do to make myself smile? I get

19:16

physical. I work out as much as I can.

19:18

I spend time with my family. I spend time

19:20

with my dog. And I, and you have to

19:22

be careful who you spend time with.

19:25

We've all had people in our lives are like, boy,

19:27

a lot of negative energy. I got to set some

19:29

boundaries and create some distance. So the

19:31

more you start doing this, it's like keeping a

19:33

clean house. Like I got teenagers at my house

19:35

and boy, if I get to get them to

19:37

clean up their stuff, it makes me so happy.

19:39

Right? But eventually the teenagers, they get

19:42

their own place and then they say they keep

19:44

it clean. We have to

19:46

keep our emotional house clean. So it's normal.

19:48

You wake up and whatever the self talk's

19:50

going on, you're not feeling like

19:52

smiling. And then I'm like,

19:56

Okay, here we go. And Then I Bring myself back

19:58

to my why. Okay. I'm so grateful

20:00

for my medical education. I'm so grateful for myself.

20:03

I'm so grateful for my family. I'm so grateful

20:05

for my team. I love my patients, I love

20:07

the results that we get. I love that where

20:09

the safest way people can do local anesthesia list.

20:12

Most doctors retire after five hundred a thousand faces

20:14

of don't over four thousand or the virtue people

20:16

in the world that have done what I've done

20:18

so now and I'm put those reasons or mice.

20:21

And people around me, they

20:23

are counting on me. They

20:26

have no idea what tragedy is going on

20:28

in my patients' lives, in my team members

20:31

life's and when I show up and I

20:33

say it's. Have gone or for the

20:35

the thieves as. A You know a yesterday they

20:37

allow is a good day. Oh My. God. I can't

20:39

believe. You guys were to

20:41

new wind like the elliptical for yesterday was we

20:43

gotta get a medal stand and will put it

20:45

was a beautiful performance. So when I show up

20:47

like that non boosted my smells point I'm trying

20:49

to boost my team smells for. It

20:52

just feels good. It's the right thing to

20:54

do. I do

20:56

this for completely selfish reasons.

20:59

I. Like to steal good.

21:03

Auto Mechanics, feelings or and I've had

21:06

my i'm a perfectionist I'm not satisfied

21:08

by anything but I just say okay

21:10

it's just let it go or it's

21:12

huge jokes and you gotta get there

21:15

are counting on its and. You.

21:17

Know. It. Feels good. It's intuitive,

21:19

it just makes sense to date as their

21:21

feels good people treat me better. I.

21:24

Get the best customer service wherever I

21:26

go. whenever. An

21:28

autonomous as people they they treat me

21:30

good. Now you know what happens when

21:32

someone. Treaty. With that customer service.

21:35

Your. Item usually them great customer service. I

21:37

give them better customer service to never. Had

21:39

a thank you so much. I appreciate

21:41

that any is. A lot to me take you

21:43

up and a lovely done with my wife. Thank.

21:46

You so much appreciate that. And

21:48

it it touches them and you.

21:50

you see you know you go to restaurant sometimes

21:52

you see like from to that person looks so

21:54

depressed like they do not want to be there

21:56

and my heart is breaking i'm new to try

21:58

and reach them so You get

22:01

addicted to this. Like

22:03

everybody's addicted to something. I'm addicted to smiling. I

22:05

don't know how my wife and kids put up

22:07

with me. They're like, dad, enough with all the

22:10

smile talk. But they're great smilers,

22:13

right? And my dogs are better

22:15

smilers than I am. Like they really got

22:17

it down. They're like, oh. You

22:19

know? So that's how I engage

22:21

my smile. I've been practicing this for

22:23

a long time. It's a skill like

22:25

anything else. Business is a

22:28

skill, learning English language, medicine, plastic

22:30

surgery. Smiling is a communication.

22:32

It is an emotional language. And the more

22:34

you do it, the better you get at

22:36

it. But there are many people in your

22:39

life who are emotionally illiterate. And

22:41

even in that good energy, they can't read

22:43

it. They just signed their name

22:45

X. They're like, they want to. So

22:47

you just gotta teach them the basics. They just

22:49

gotta learn their ABCs. So that's a

22:51

little bit about how I get my energy up. As

22:54

an Orthodox says it may be. It

22:56

works for me. And I have a

22:58

lot of my plastic surgery colleagues all across

23:00

the country. One of the first things

23:02

I do when I talk to them, because our business is

23:04

double or triple the business of what most plastic surgeons do.

23:08

The very first thing I talk to them about,

23:10

what holds every entrepreneur back? Themselves.

23:13

If they're trying to build their practice and they're

23:15

like low smile score, and they're frustrated and they're

23:18

getting short with their staff, forget

23:20

it. Let's give it the rocket

23:22

fuel and love that staff and love your team and

23:24

build them up and grow them. So

23:27

that's a little bit about how I like to get

23:29

my smile score. It's a workout. I'm a

23:31

smile marathoner. And we're running every day. We

23:33

run the race. I

23:36

love it. Yeah, I think a lot

23:38

of those strategies, right? It's almost classic

23:40

sort of Tony Robbins, priming routine, change

23:42

your physicality. Then I think it makes

23:44

little sense. I also really like the

23:47

point you made around breaking through or

23:49

not being so caught up in

23:52

the social structures that can often inhibit

23:54

us from doing things. I'm a huge

23:57

fan of the concept of rejection therapy.

24:00

or social skydiving or all of these concepts. And

24:02

we've interviewed a lot of different people who talk

24:04

about these things on the show. But

24:06

to me, these concepts of getting out there and

24:08

getting yourself really uncomfortable, like a couple months ago,

24:10

I was traveling with a, with a business partner

24:13

of mine and we're working on it. We were

24:15

doing a site visit for a company we're looking

24:17

to acquire and we were in

24:19

the Delta Sky Lounge and

24:21

we had like a two hour layover and we were sitting

24:23

there. In the middle of it, we just sat

24:25

down on the floor of the Delta Sky Lounge and started doing pushups.

24:28

There's, it was packed. There's

24:30

hundreds of the Detroit Delta Sky Lounge.

24:35

Anyway, I have a photo, everybody's like turning

24:38

like what's wrong with this guy? Right. But

24:40

the whole reason we did it was just

24:42

to make ourselves uncomfortable and sort of punch

24:44

through, pierce the veil of the illusion that

24:46

we have to follow all of these social

24:49

rules. And as you said, it's a muscle

24:51

or the more you build that tolerance of

24:53

getting uncomfortable, punching through, it gets

24:55

easier and easier. And you also realize

24:58

nothing bad happens and it really only good

25:00

things happen because you build skill sets like

25:02

smiling and being able to change your state

25:05

and those kinds of things. And

25:07

you actually learn, you're like, I

25:10

didn't realize it could be this good. I

25:12

didn't realize people would treat me this nicely. Right.

25:15

I mean, what an honor it is

25:17

to be on this podcast with you.

25:19

When I put this energy out there,

25:21

you're like, Hey, Rich, why don't you do

25:23

it? Let's do a podcast. I'm like, well, thank

25:25

you. That's so nice. But you would have

25:27

never offered this to me if you didn't like

25:29

my energy. Totally true. Totally

25:32

true. And what a gift that was a gift

25:34

that I received because I put out as much

25:36

positive energy as I can and you receive

25:38

it back. This is just one of the many examples.

25:41

I promise you there's so much more. And

25:43

then I tell people, I think you're ready for the

25:45

smile challenge. What is the smile

25:47

challenge? The smile challenge. You

25:49

talk about rejection therapy, right? Smiling

25:52

is a great rejection therapy. The

25:54

smile challenges identify situations in your

25:56

life where you don't bring

25:58

your best smile or people. you don't have the

26:00

best smiles. And then you invite yourself

26:03

to smile more or to help

26:05

other people to smile. What would that look like ethically,

26:08

kindly, gracefully? So for me, one of my smile

26:10

challenges, my wife, she's the woman of my dreams.

26:12

We've been married for 22 years. When

26:15

I'm driving and she's telling me

26:17

how to drive or where to drive, she's the sweetest

26:19

person. We're at each other's

26:22

throats. It's nuts. I don't

26:24

know why we're going crazy with each other. So

26:26

that's the smile challenge. I'm like, we are definitely

26:28

not smiling. So now I'm driving, she's telling

26:30

me what to do. This is my smile challenge. I

26:32

say, honey, I'm making that left

26:34

turn. You ask me to, did

26:36

I do a good job? I

26:38

love it when you tell me how to drive and

26:41

where to drive. It just, it touches my heart, honey.

26:43

And we have fun with it. Just be fussy fun.

26:45

At the end of the day, look,

26:47

we get tired. At the end of the day, we're

26:49

tired. Grouchy, I may say something, be short with someone.

26:51

I'm like, at the end of the day, I'm with

26:53

my wife and we're like, I'm Grouchy, oh, she's fussy.

26:55

I'm like, who's fussy? Are you Grouchy? You're

26:58

so cute when you're fussy. It's a

27:01

smile challenge. It changes things up. It's

27:03

never too late to do

27:05

the right thing. And so yeah, so

27:07

there you have it. So

27:10

what would you say, I'm sure you encounter

27:12

folks who have a more skeptical view, probably

27:14

low smile score for what it's worth, but

27:16

who would say something like, this is just

27:19

the equivalent of slapping a smile and saying,

27:21

I'm happy, I'm happy, I'm happy, I'm happy.

27:23

But deep down until your head explodes, you

27:25

just keep them happy. How

27:29

do you refute that or how do you think about this

27:32

not being that? Yeah, so first

27:35

of all, by example, but I have a lot of

27:37

people, they're doubters. And I would do these talks where

27:39

I get up on stage and I have people do

27:41

exercises. So one of the exercises we do is people

27:43

face off with each other and

27:46

you get a partner, like each face your partner.

27:48

One partner hand up, the other partner hand down.

27:50

Whoever's hand up, they're the smiler. The

27:52

other person hands down, do not smile,

27:54

they're the poker face. And we say

27:56

on three, smiler, your job is to make them smile.

27:59

Ready? One, two, three, go. Come on, I'm

28:01

like, come on, let's go. And then they all start going like this

28:03

and like this and then the stiff faces here, the poker face.

28:06

And they get them. They're like,

28:09

they can't now occasionally you get some people, they

28:11

will not smile through the whole exercise. And

28:13

you know what happens when the exercise is over? Poker

28:16

face, they go, you couldn't get me to

28:18

smile. So

28:21

it just, it shows it when you're in

28:23

a room full of people that does that

28:25

exercise, you cannot refute. The proof is there.

28:28

And after a while you're like, okay, do

28:31

people see me as a jerk or not smiling

28:33

that much? It's like, you just want to be

28:35

human. Everybody wants to ease up and

28:37

laugh. And we hold on

28:39

to our expectations because we don't want

28:42

to lower our standards. But

28:44

when we realize, hey, you can release your expectations of you

28:46

got to be serious or I've got to have dignity or

28:48

you got to have treatment with respect, you

28:50

can release those expectations and you can still maintain

28:52

a high standard through a different way,

28:55

through positivity. It can very much

28:57

sound like SpongeBob SquarePants, right? Who is a great role

28:59

model, by the way. SpongeBob is

29:01

amazing. But we can, we don't

29:03

have to take ourselves too seriously. Life is

29:05

an experiment. So go test it for yourself

29:07

and see which one you like better. Right?

29:10

Do you feel that pit gnawing in your stomach?

29:12

Do you feel like you're getting chest pain? Okay.

29:15

Some people they need smile CPR. Like

29:18

some people I'm doing like running a smile code. I'm

29:20

doing compressions. I'm like, come on, we shock them with

29:22

the things instead of shocking them and then they just

29:24

shock their faces. Whatever

29:26

it takes, right? So yeah,

29:28

there's doubters and skeptics out there. Not everyone

29:30

is ready for this message. Right?

29:33

Let's be honest. I want to give it to

29:35

everybody, but not everybody is really open to receiving

29:37

it. Most people are. Most

29:40

people are. And some people will say, you

29:43

know what, I get it, but I've got bigger fish to fry.

29:46

Sooner or later, you just get so

29:48

burned out, then you just got

29:50

to try something. And when you start

29:52

to see, Hey, this works and people

29:55

are good. People are

29:57

loving, especially when you give them

29:59

good. energy. And

30:01

what's really cool, so this is like so special

30:03

right, so what I do right, I try and

30:06

live here in the high like eight, nine, and

30:08

even up to the ten. But here's

30:10

what's really cool, when you're here,

30:12

when you're here you can only receive

30:14

positive energy, like you'll get a little positive

30:16

energy but you're not really giving out

30:18

positive energy. When you're here you're

30:21

doing a little bit of pitching but you're catching and you're

30:23

saying, oh hey Matt good to see you, you know, a

30:26

little something friendly back and forth. Here you're

30:28

giving out so much positive energy, you're making other

30:30

people smile and laugh. When my kids were young

30:32

and that we've taken to the theme parks and

30:34

stuff and I would throw them up in the

30:36

air and not having in the stroller, we were

30:38

racing around, people would just look at us like

30:40

playing around and just start laughing at us. Like

30:42

we were just having fun, we didn't follow the

30:44

rules, we were just having a good time. We're

30:46

out here, so it's just so powerful and I

30:48

learned I would just make friends out

30:50

of total strangers. When I live here, like I

30:53

meet someone and they would look at me and laugh,

30:55

like he's like, they say, I remember what my kids

30:57

were that age, oh they're so darling and

31:00

how can I, I don't ever want to go back to

31:02

here. Like I can't, I won't, so

31:05

you know you have to try it on for

31:07

yourself. Here's another example you can do, like if

31:09

you've got your phone, everybody get your phone out,

31:11

just take a picture of yourself, take a selfie,

31:14

big smiling selfie, really big smiling selfie, so

31:16

take yourself and get your phone out and

31:19

get that big selfie going, a big smile,

31:21

then do another

31:23

selfie, but this time do it neutral, no

31:26

smile. Here we go, I'm serious, serious

31:29

business, the DMV photo and

31:31

then you just swap them back and forth and

31:33

you say, okay well who do I want as

31:35

my doctor, who do I trust more, who

31:38

likes me more, I don't

31:40

want people looking at me when I'm just flat, everybody

31:43

looks better. I say this in my office all the

31:45

time, people come to me, they want to look younger

31:47

and I can help people look 10, 20 years younger,

31:49

looks natural, the best facelift, looks like you never had

31:51

a facelift, the best fillers look like you never had

31:54

fillers, but I tell all my patients, if

31:56

you really want to look your best, the

31:58

smile, none of my treatment, look who's

32:00

gonna smile. We like the shape

32:03

of our face when we smile. So artistically

32:05

and scientifically, I already know what I'm striving

32:07

for. There's no guessing there. And if you

32:09

want to look even younger than what we

32:11

can achieve with cosmetic treatments, then you

32:13

just have to act immature. Right? So

32:16

and then so I know I got a brag on

32:18

my patients. I'm just so proud of my patients. So

32:20

this, you know, Maddie, she's in her mid 70s, right?

32:23

Here she is. Wow. Loss of volume.

32:25

She did lift laser filler. And let me see

32:27

if I can advance this here. And

32:29

look how much better she looks when she's

32:31

smiling, right? She looks totally natural. She's in her

32:33

70s. Like she loves us. She is so

32:36

thrilled. But we do facelift laser

32:38

treatments. I can send these over if

32:40

it shows better on video, but this

32:42

is lift laser filler. Yeah. So

32:44

cosmetic treatments that are done right. Everybody thinks

32:47

a botched when you think of plastic surgery.

32:49

But this is what I do. This is

32:51

where I use my facial analysis, treat

32:53

my patients and look how good we look when we smile.

32:55

And she looks good when she's not smiling. But

32:57

she looks better when she is smiling.

33:00

And then here's here's my smile buddies. There's me,

33:02

right? I did some fillers on my eyes. I

33:04

made my jawline shorter. I'm actually 85 years

33:07

old. I've just done a lot of treatments. Okay,

33:09

so you look great. So thank you. I wear

33:11

it. Well, yeah. And then and these are my

33:13

small buddies. So this is our team. Like we

33:16

got the best team. Let me tell

33:18

you something. Like every day in our office, it's

33:20

a joy and you know, our team, they have

33:22

their challenges, they bring their troubles to work. But

33:25

they treat me like I'm at the risk Carlton every

33:27

day, they treat our patients so well. And

33:29

our whole team, our team is

33:31

addicted to smiling and good positive

33:33

energy. We attract those patients like

33:36

we have the best patients. They

33:38

love us. And there's always some exceptions, some

33:40

patients, they need a little more love than

33:43

others. But you know, so

33:45

I'm addicted. And since I've gone working

33:47

with doctors all across the country, and

33:49

we do national conventions and teaching many

33:51

different industries, I've taught with attorneys, teachers,

33:54

executives, physicians, you name it, I don't

33:56

care how serious they are, they've

33:58

got an opportunity. Top of that

34:00

mask. Worth. It so everything you touch on

34:03

this a few times but the concept of positive

34:05

energy when you put out positive energy it made

34:07

most cases comes back to and even if it

34:09

doesn't. Personally, My

34:11

experience and and research validates this. Even in

34:13

when some gives you negative energy, responding with

34:15

positive energy still result in a better outcome

34:17

than responding with night of Energy at least

34:19

in my experience in my opinion And sounds

34:22

like you have a similar experience probably even

34:24

more so because you're so positive and have

34:26

such a high smile Score. But it's so

34:28

amazing to me that you know the old

34:30

saying you can get more flies with honey.

34:33

Than. Vinegar. I. Mostly

34:35

operate out of that, even in a

34:37

business. Contacts even in difficult are tough

34:40

business situations, I'm very rarely rude or

34:42

yelling at people. or I just I

34:44

think in almost every case, You.

34:47

Accomplish less or even sabotage yourself when

34:49

you have a really negative approach to

34:51

folks. But to me to the seems

34:54

like a really. A Com and

34:56

seem across a lot of things I've seen. It

34:58

seems like it's reinforced by your experience and also

35:00

the science around smiling. Absolutely a so

35:02

rarely router yelling, but in some cases it's

35:05

called for. Various

35:08

math but every now and then I

35:10

don't know I will reserve the right

35:12

you're human I very rarely. Let's

35:15

be honest where human right and I get

35:17

frustrated, upset and I if I go there

35:19

as quickly as I can I apologize. I'm

35:22

I'm so sorry and what might negative energy

35:24

to? Come on you, you're wonderful glorious person.

35:26

But I'm just frustrated about this and I

35:28

want to handle this so you know to

35:30

speak to your point about positive energy getting

35:32

the best that of people. Let me use

35:34

the chat Gp T reference one of the

35:36

things that I love that Changi P T

35:38

it is taught me how to make better

35:40

queries Rights if you want a good response

35:42

from Kept to Be T need to give

35:44

a good query. every time you talk

35:46

to someone if you're in the line ordering

35:48

suit you're giving a query and you're going

35:50

to get a result back where you have

35:52

a business decision or patients se you giving

35:54

them a query they're going to give you

35:56

some response back now with the smile score

35:58

if you add in your query emotional positivity.

36:01

I feel good. So when I'm doing this

36:03

like my joy hormones are going off like

36:05

this and when I am

36:07

feeling endorphins and my neurotransmitters

36:10

are firing off positively, we

36:12

feel that in other people. So

36:14

every query you give to another person, don't

36:17

eliminate that from your query. You should put that in

36:19

your query because when you put that into your query,

36:21

you're going to get some of that positive endorphin back

36:24

from them. You get that response. So if you

36:26

look at every human, we're all an individual large

36:28

language model, right? Is that fair to say? It's

36:31

a reasonable presumption. So give

36:34

a good query. That's an analytical computer way,

36:36

a coding way. That energy is a part

36:38

of your query because I can say, Matt,

36:40

what do you think the fastest way is

36:42

to grow my business, you know, given this

36:44

much capital and this type of team, what

36:46

would you say? And then

36:49

if I ask and I say, Matt, what's

36:51

the best way to grow my business if

36:53

I got this capital and I've got this

36:55

dream, I've got this vision that I really

36:57

want to do something so special, like what

36:59

would you recommend? You're going to

37:01

give me a different response back. Now, it

37:03

also works to your detriment. If I go to someone

37:06

and I say, I want this, I

37:08

need that, what's the answer? And

37:10

if I'm unemotional and I'm flat and it's like,

37:12

whoa, it's like I'm Mr. New Yorker. I love

37:14

New Yorkers, but you know, so you're not going

37:16

to get a good response back.

37:19

So it may, it may make sense. However,

37:22

people do plenty of things that don't make sense.

37:25

Right? I love the Keith Cunningham quote. He says,

37:27

you want to be successful in business. You

37:29

don't need all these smart ideas. Just don't

37:31

do dumb things. Don't do the dumb things.

37:34

Sounds easy, actually very difficult to

37:36

do. When you're building relationships, it's

37:38

dumb to have a low smile score. It's

37:40

dumb to make people think that you don't

37:42

really like them or that you're not interested

37:44

in them or fascinated by them or inspired

37:46

by them or that you want to grow

37:48

with them. That's dumb. When you have

37:50

an opportunity to connect with someone who's important, you

37:53

were shown like, oh my God, I care about

37:55

this. I'm so excited. This is an honor for

37:57

me. Let me list. There's

38:00

no place I'd rather be. It's

38:02

dumb to do anything else. So that's

38:04

just the way I look at it. I

38:08

can talk until your ears fall off about this, but

38:10

it's had so many positive impacts in my life and

38:12

the people around me. And in

38:14

fact, we put together, before I forget, we put it in

38:16

our Wall Street Journal best seller,

38:19

the Smile Prescription. You can download the Kindle

38:21

on Amazon, and whether I'm

38:23

doing training, speaking engagement. So we talk

38:25

more about the research in here and

38:28

examples on boosting SmileScore. Or if someone needs to boost

38:30

their SmileScore up, this is the tool, this

38:32

is the go-to. So I have

38:34

one or two other questions before we wrap

38:36

up. But thinking about, you

38:38

touched on, you know, you've built this team,

38:41

your organization, everybody's amazing,

38:43

everybody's smiling. How did

38:45

you fight through the resistance to get

38:47

people bought in? And was

38:49

it more about finding the people who

38:51

already smiled, quote unquote? Or was it

38:53

more about teaching folks to smile? I

38:56

think it's like being a professional athlete. You

38:58

find the best athletes, you got to train them. What

39:00

happens to the athletes? They get injuries. You

39:03

need trainers. You're going to find the best people, stuff's going

39:05

to go on in their life. They're going to get, you

39:07

know, their kids are going to have trouble. They're going to

39:09

have financial troubles. They're going to get a divorce, something. So

39:11

you find the best people, you keep nurturing, and every day

39:14

you go in, you're watering the crops. Every

39:16

day you go in. So I, before I come into the

39:18

office, I got to be paying attention to myself. If

39:21

I'm not sleeping well, if I'm not

39:23

taking care of myself and I show up and

39:25

grouchy in the office, it has repercussions. It

39:28

has shock waves. Team gets burned out. I

39:30

don't have to yell at my team. If I give them

39:32

the look the wrong way, they feel yelled at. I

39:35

don't want to do that to them, right? And

39:37

as us A plus achievers and entrepreneurs, we're type A

39:40

personalities, we've got to have everything our way in. I'm

39:42

a surgeon, right? I want everything I want the way

39:44

I want it right now, and I'm ready to go,

39:46

you know? But you got to be

39:48

kind to these people. So yes,

39:51

you got to recruit them as best you

39:53

can. Yes, you got to nurture them. Now,

39:55

on top of that, you need good business

39:57

processes. You have to keep revisiting your business

39:59

processes. Because sometimes you have a

40:01

business process that it just doesn't work anymore.

40:04

And that's where we call our smile audit

40:06

comes through. We had a chance to do

40:08

that with one of your business associates and it was

40:10

very eye-opening. Every

40:12

business, no matter what system you come up

40:14

with, it's not about design. Elon Musk said

40:16

design is overrated and implementation and

40:18

manufacturing is underrated. You got to iterate over and

40:21

over and over again. So you bring in the

40:23

team, you got your systems. Every

40:25

day you're iterating, how's it good? You make it even better

40:27

and better. And if you have a process that's not that

40:29

great, if you iterate it over and

40:31

over and over again, the design doesn't have to

40:33

be great, but your execution is so good. Right?

40:36

So there's no substitute for that.

40:38

But the smile score allows you

40:40

to look at it from a

40:42

different perspective. Change

40:44

your perspective, change your whole world.

40:48

Everyone needs the smile score. And then once you get

40:50

addicted to it, I mean, we're all in this together.

40:52

We're here to help others. So hire

40:54

for that success, keep iterating every day, keep smiling.

40:56

And then I tell people when I give my

40:58

talks and I ask at the end, I say,

41:00

look, I'm going to ask for

41:02

a donation to support the

41:04

cause. I want to know who is

41:07

going to donate 500 smiles

41:09

for the cause. Right? Can it show

41:11

up and people start cheering. They're like, I'll donate. Who's going

41:13

to donate a thousand? Who's going to donate 10,000 smiles? Yeah,

41:17

the energy is going. I say, how many

41:19

smiles should you give? Ask

41:21

yourself how successful do you want to be? How

41:23

happy do you want to be? And how

41:26

much value do you want to create for others? When

41:28

you know the answer to that, you'll know

41:31

how much you should smile. I

41:33

love that. And you may have just answered

41:35

this question to some extent. But for somebody

41:37

who wants to start smiling, who wants to

41:39

implement this, who wants to

41:41

take concrete action to put some

41:44

of these concepts into place in their life today,

41:46

what would be one action item or piece of

41:48

homework you would give them to start with as

41:50

soon as they finish listening to this? Look in

41:53

the mirror. Go make somebody smile. Just

41:55

make anybody smile. However you do it, do

41:57

a little dance or do something silly. Make

41:59

yourself smile. smile. The

42:02

funniest, you want to do something funny, even

42:04

if it's not funny, then it's really funny

42:07

because when things aren't funny, like that's not funny

42:09

at all. That's hilarious when people are doing stuff

42:11

that's not funny. Oh my god, that's terrible. We

42:13

laugh at that. So humor, you'll find

42:16

it. Just go to your humor and don't give

42:18

a damn what people think about you

42:20

and then you know you can look

42:22

us up. We're here for you. Look me up if

42:24

you need help. I've had people call me all the

42:26

time. I was just talking with, just this

42:28

weekend, I was talking with a physician who's

42:31

in an executive position. We went

42:33

through a whole process that we go through

42:35

and in addition to my smile audit, I

42:37

do a process when whatever process you have

42:39

and it gets challenged and frustrated and

42:42

it needs reworking. I call it my messy thought

42:44

syndrome process. I use this with my patients because

42:46

patients come in and they're all over the place

42:48

and I rein them in to help them come

42:50

up with a good plan. Messy thought syndrome, we

42:52

put things in writing, we break it down into

42:55

the basics. If you're dealing with messy

42:57

thought syndrome, that's going to bring your smile score down.

42:59

Your confused, you're overwhelmed, you don't know what to do.

43:01

When you have clarity, it sounds so

43:03

simple but people live with

43:05

so much messiness and ambiguity and

43:07

lack of clarity. So that's

43:10

the other important ingredient. Get some clarity. Let's

43:12

deal with your messy thought syndrome. If you need any

43:14

help, give us a call. We're here for you. I

43:16

like it and so Dr. Rich, where can people find

43:18

you and your work online? Yeah, we're

43:21

at imagelift.com. We're in Tampa

43:25

in the villages. We help people look younger

43:27

and if you're looking, you can look

43:29

us up. We're here for you. Look me up if you

43:31

need help. I've had people call me all the time.

43:33

I was just talking with, just this

43:36

weekend, I was talking with a physician who's

43:38

in an executive position. We went

43:40

through a whole process that we go through

43:42

and in addition to my smile audit, I

43:44

do a process when whatever process you have

43:47

and it gets challenged and frustrated and

43:49

it needs reworking. I call it

43:51

my messy thought syndrome process. I use this with my

43:54

patients because patients come in and they're all over the

43:56

place and I rein them in to help them come

43:58

up with a good plan. thought

44:00

syndrome, we put things in writing, we break it

44:02

down into the basics. If you're dealing with messy

44:04

thought syndrome, that's going to bring your smile score

44:06

down. You're confused, you're overwhelmed, you don't know what

44:08

to do. When you have clarity, sounds so simple,

44:11

but people live with so much messiness

44:13

and ambiguity and lack of clarity.

44:16

So that's the other important ingredient, get some

44:18

clarity. Let's deal with your messy thoughts syndrome.

44:21

You need any help? Give us a call. We're here for

44:23

you. Dr. Justin Marchegiani I like it. And so, Dr. Rich,

44:25

where can people find you and your work online? Dr.

44:27

Rich Yeah, we're at imagelift.com. imagelift.com. We're in

44:29

Tampa in the villages. We help people look

44:31

younger. And if you're looking for executive support,

44:34

give us a call through the main office

44:36

number and let them know. Ask for me

44:38

and we'll get you in touch and get

44:40

you what you need. We do

44:43

have a warning, however, that we cannot be

44:45

held responsible for any behavior people engage in

44:47

when they're smiling more and their business is

44:49

more successful and they're making more money. I

44:52

just want to warn people upfront just to

44:54

be prepared. Dr. Justin Marchegiani Awesome. Well,

44:56

Dr. Rich, thank you so much for coming

44:58

on the show for sharing this wisdom and for putting

45:00

a smile on my face during this conversation. Dr.

45:02

Rich It's my privilege. My honor. We'll be in touch,

45:05

Matt. Thank you so much. We're here to help

45:07

this world be a better place, one

45:09

smile at a time. Dr. Justin Marchegiani

45:11

Thank you so much for listening to the

45:13

science of success. We created the

45:15

show to help you, our listeners, master

45:17

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45:20

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45:22

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45:24

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45:26

email is matt

45:28

at successpodcast.com. That's

45:30

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45:34

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45:36

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