0:01

Thanks for listening tonight. If

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you'd like to listen out free and

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get access to exclusive bonus episodes, check

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out our Sleepy Bookshelf Premium feed in

0:11

the show notes. Good

0:15

evening, and welcome

0:18

to the Sleepy Bookshelf, where

0:21

we put down our worries from the day

0:24

and pick up a good book. I'm

0:28

Elizabeth, your host. Thank

0:31

you so much for being here this

0:33

evening, because

0:36

tonight we are

0:38

continuing with Violette. But

0:41

before we do, let's

0:43

take a moment to

0:46

prepare for a restful sleep.

0:51

Wherever you are, notice

0:54

how nice it feels to

0:57

close your eyes after a long day.

1:03

Begin to breathe steadily

1:06

and evenly in

1:09

through your nose and

1:13

out through your mouth. With

1:18

each breath, you

1:21

are calming your body and

1:23

mind. You

1:26

are melting away the stresses of

1:28

the day and

1:31

slowing down, ready

1:34

for sleep. Focus

1:39

on where you are right

1:41

now, and

1:44

release any thoughts that might creep

1:46

up about today or

1:49

tomorrow. Always

1:52

come back to

1:54

your even breath. And

1:58

when you're ready, Drift

2:00

your focus to the sound of my

2:02

voice as I recap

2:04

our last episode. Madame

2:11

Back asks Lucy to go

2:13

into town to collect some

2:15

fabrics and also take

2:17

a basket of exotic fruits from

2:20

the damn wall ravens, specifically

2:23

to be placed in

2:25

that lady's own hands. An

2:29

old priest was just leaving

2:32

the address as Lucy

2:34

arrived and helped to

2:36

convince the lady at the door to

2:39

allow Lucy to see Madame War

2:41

Ravens. Lucy

2:44

waited in the barely

2:46

furnished salon and

2:49

an old woman eventually came to

2:51

her, very short with

2:54

a hunched back, but

2:56

finally dressed in a

2:59

brocade gown and dripping

3:01

with jewelry. She

3:04

rudely received Madame Back's

3:06

gift and left abruptly.

3:11

The priest invited Lucy to

3:14

sit in a smaller salon

3:16

to wait out the storm

3:18

outside and told

3:20

her a story about a

3:22

young nun whose portrait

3:24

hung on the wall. Justine

3:28

Marie was the granddaughter

3:30

of Madame War Ravens

3:33

and was in love with a

3:35

young man whose father died leaving

3:37

him in debt. Justine's

3:41

family wouldn't allow the marriage on

3:43

account of this and

3:46

so she took her vows instead but

3:49

died young at the

3:51

convent. Her

3:54

father, a jeweller, fell

3:57

into some bad business and

3:59

also died, leaving the

4:02

family destitute. Out

4:05

of love for Justine Marie,

4:08

the young man rescued

4:10

her mother and

4:12

grandmother and provided

4:14

accommodations and food more

4:17

than a loving son would do. Madame

4:22

Warravens had never repaid

4:25

the kindness and

4:27

was the only member of the family

4:29

still living. The

4:32

young man in question was

4:35

Monsieur Paul Emmanuel and

4:38

the old priest, Per

4:40

Cylus, who had helped

4:42

Lucy on the night of

4:44

her confession. And that is

4:47

where we pick up tonight, with

4:50

Madame Beck urging

4:52

Lucy to forget the whole

4:54

affair. So,

4:57

just lie back and

5:00

relax as I

5:02

turn to the next pages of

5:05

the web. Chapter

5:19

35 Fraternity Oubliele

5:27

Proffeso, forget

5:29

the professors, so

5:32

said Madame Beck. Madame

5:37

Beck was a wise woman, but

5:40

she should not have uttered those

5:42

words. To do

5:44

so was a mistake. At

5:48

night she should have left me

5:50

calm, not excited,

5:54

indifferent, not

5:57

interested, isolated.

6:00

in my own estimation and

6:02

that of others, not

6:05

connected even in

6:08

idea with this second

6:10

person whom I was to forget.

6:15

Forget him. They

6:18

took a sage plan to make

6:20

me forget him, the wise

6:22

one, his head. They

6:25

showed me how good he was. They

6:28

made of my dear little man a

6:31

stainless little hero. Then

6:35

they had prated about his manner

6:37

of loving. What

6:40

means had I before this

6:42

day of being certain

6:44

whether he could love at all or

6:46

not? I

6:50

had known him jealous, suspicious.

6:55

I had seen about

6:57

him certain tendernesses, fitfulnesses,

7:00

the softness

7:03

which came like a warm air

7:06

and a roof which passed

7:08

like early dew, dried

7:11

in the heat of his

7:13

irritabilities. This

7:16

was all I had seen. And

7:20

there, Persilis

7:23

and Modest Maria Beck, that

7:26

these two wrought in concert I

7:28

could not doubt, opened

7:31

up the edictum of his heart,

7:35

showed me one grand

7:37

love. The

7:40

child of this southern nature's

7:42

youth, born so

7:45

strong and perfect

7:48

that it had laughed at death

7:50

himself, despised

7:52

his mean treatment of

7:54

matter, clung

7:57

to immortal spirit. and

8:00

in victory and faith, had

8:03

watched beside a tomb twenty

8:05

years. This

8:09

had been done not idly.

8:13

This was not a mere hollow indulgence

8:15

of sentiment. He

8:18

had proven his fidelity by

8:21

the consecration of his best

8:23

energies to an unselfish purpose,

8:26

and attested it by

8:29

limitless personal sacrifices.

8:32

For those once dear to her

8:35

he prized, he

8:37

had laid down vengeance and

8:40

taken up a cross. Now,

8:45

as for Justine Marie, I knew

8:49

what she was as well as if I had

8:51

seen her. I

8:54

knew she was well enough. There

8:57

were girls like her in Madam Beck

8:59

School, Phlegmatics,

9:02

pale, slow, inert,

9:06

but kind-natured, neutral

9:09

of evil, undistinguished

9:12

for good. If

9:16

she wore angels' wings, I

9:19

knew whose poet fancy conferred them.

9:23

If her forehead shone luminous

9:26

with the reflex of a halo,

9:30

I knew in the fire

9:32

of whose irids that circlet

9:34

of holy flame had

9:36

generation. Was

9:41

I, then, to be frightened

9:43

by Justine Marie? Was

9:47

the picture of a pale,

9:49

dead nun to rise an

9:52

eternal barrier? And

9:56

what of the charities which absorbed

9:58

his Worldly goods? Who

10:01

says his heart. Swoon.

10:04

To virginity. Madam.

10:10

Silas. You should

10:12

not have suggested these questions.

10:15

They were it once, the deepest

10:18

puzzle. The strongest

10:20

obstruction. And the

10:22

keenest stimulus I had. Ever

10:25

felt. So.

10:28

We can nights and days.

10:30

I fell asleep. By

10:33

Dream. And I will

10:36

come on these. Two

10:38

questions. In

10:41

the home, well step. Is

10:43

no answer to them

10:45

except. Where one.little

10:47

man stood. More.

10:53

Lax it under the had piece

10:55

of a and it on a

10:57

drag. Them within

10:59

the guy ever sorry palliative.

11:03

Much be in and.

11:05

Know little noticed. Too

11:10

that to to the real damage

11:12

a. I did want to

11:14

see him again. Felt

11:18

is is knowing what I

11:20

now knew his countenance. Would

11:23

offer page more li

11:25

head more interesting. Than ever.

11:29

I felt a longing. To

11:32

trace in it that imprinted

11:34

that Senate is devoted miss.

11:37

The sign says that. Hearts nightly

11:40

half St. Louis chivalry

11:42

which the priests narrative

11:45

imputed to his nature.

11:50

Kids become my Christian

11:52

hero. Under

11:54

that character I wanted to see him.

11:58

know will this opportunity slow to

12:01

favour. My

12:03

new impressions underwent her test

12:06

the next day. Yes,

12:09

I was granted an interview with my

12:11

Christian hero. An

12:14

interview not very heroic, all

12:17

sentimental, or biblical,

12:21

but lively enough in its way. About

12:26

three o'clock of the afternoon,

12:29

the peace of the first

12:31

class, safely established

12:33

as it seemed under

12:35

the serene sway of Madame Beck,

12:39

who, in appropriate

12:42

persona, was

12:44

giving one of her orderly

12:46

and useful lessons. This

12:49

peace, I say, suffered a

12:52

sudden fracture by

12:54

the wild imbus of

12:56

a palietto. Nobody

13:02

at the moment was quieter

13:04

than myself, eased

13:08

of responsibility by Madame Beck's

13:10

cousins, soothed

13:13

by her uniformed homes,

13:16

pleased and edified with

13:19

her clear exposition of

13:21

the subject in hand, for

13:23

she taught well. I

13:26

said, bent over

13:28

my depths, drawing,

13:31

that is, copying an

13:34

elaborate line engraving, tediously

13:37

working up my copy

13:39

to the finish of the

13:42

original, for that was my

13:44

practical notion of art. And

13:47

strange to say, it took

13:49

extreme pleasure in the labour,

13:51

and could even produce curiously

13:54

finical Chinese facsimiles

13:58

of steel or metal. things

14:02

about as valuable as so

14:04

many great achievements in

14:07

worsted work, but

14:09

I thought pretty well of them in those

14:11

days. What

14:15

was the matter? My

14:17

drawing, my pencils,

14:20

my precious copy gathered

14:23

into one crushed-up handful,

14:26

perished from before my sight.

14:30

I myself appeared to be shaken

14:33

or emptied out of my chair, as

14:36

a solitary and withered nutmeg

14:39

might be emptied out of

14:41

a spice box by

14:43

an excited cook. At

14:47

chair and my desk, seized

14:50

by the wild pallet of,

14:53

one under each sleeve were

14:56

born afar. In

14:59

a second I followed the furniture.

15:02

In two minutes, they

15:05

and I were fixed in the

15:07

centre of the grand cell, a

15:10

vast adjoining room, seldom

15:13

used, save for dancing

15:16

and choral singing lessons, fixed

15:20

with an emphasis which seems

15:22

to prohibit the remotest hope

15:25

of our ever being permitted to

15:28

stir thence again. Having

15:33

partially collected my scared

15:35

wits, I found

15:37

myself in the presence of two men,

15:41

gentlemen I suppose I should say.

15:45

One dark, the

15:47

other light. One

15:50

having a stiff, half

15:52

military air and wearing

15:54

a braided sartou. The

15:57

other partaking in garb and

16:00

and bearing, more of

16:02

the careless aspect of the student

16:05

or artist class, both

16:08

flourishing in full magnificence

16:11

of mustaches, whiskers,

16:14

and imperial. Monsieur

16:19

Emmanuel stood a little

16:21

apart from these. His

16:24

countenance and eyes expressed

16:26

a strong color. He

16:29

held forth his hand with his

16:32

tribune gesture. Mademoiselle

16:36

said he, your business

16:38

is to prove to these gentlemen

16:41

that I am no liar. You

16:44

will answer, to the best of your

16:46

ability, such questions as

16:48

they shall put. You

16:50

will also write on such theme

16:53

as they shall select. In

16:55

their eyes, it appears, I hold

16:58

the position of an

17:00

unprincipled imposter. I

17:03

write essays, and

17:05

with deliberate forgery, sign

17:08

them to my people's names, and

17:11

boast of them as their work. You

17:14

will disprove this charge. Grand

17:20

ciel. Here

17:22

was the show trial, so

17:24

long of hated. Come

17:26

on me like a thunderclap. These

17:31

two fine, braided,

17:34

moustachioed, sneering

17:37

personages were

17:39

none other than the dandy professors of

17:41

the college, Messiers

17:43

Boissek and Rochamont,

17:47

a pair of cold-blooded fops

17:50

and pedants, skeptics

17:52

and scoffers. It

17:57

Seemed that Monsieur Paul had been

17:59

rashly gazbittingly. Something I had

18:01

written. Something he had never

18:03

once. Praise or even mentioned

18:05

in my hearing and

18:07

which I deemed forgotten.

18:12

The essay was not remarkable

18:14

toward. To me

18:17

seemed remarkable compared with the

18:19

average productions. A Foreign school

18:21

girls. In an English

18:23

establishment would have passed scarce

18:26

know test. This

18:28

is my second novel. Someones

18:30

has thought proper question. It's

18:32

genuine nets. Didn't sinewy

18:35

to cheat. I

18:37

was now to ban my testimony to.

18:39

The truth. And to be put.

18:41

To the To As bar

18:43

examination. A.

18:46

Memorable See in in seized.

18:51

They began with sex.

18:54

A dead blank. A

18:57

went on to French history. I

19:00

hardly knew mail Jose from

19:02

pheromones. They.

19:05

Tried mean various oddities.

19:08

And still only gotta shake

19:10

ahead. And an

19:12

unchanging. I. Do not know.

19:17

After and expressive pull

19:19

his they proceeded to

19:21

matters of general information

19:23

poaching. One or two subject

19:25

switch time he pretty well and

19:27

on which I had often reflected.

19:32

Monsieur I man you. Wow!

19:34

Who had hitherto steward looking

19:37

gone down to the Winter

19:39

Solstice? Brightened up

19:41

some month. He

19:43

thought I should now shame myself, at

19:45

least in a food. He.

19:48

Learned his era, balance

19:52

to the question sad

19:54

stops fast my mind

19:56

selling like a rising

19:58

wow Ideas

20:00

were there, but not

20:03

words. I

20:05

either could not or would not

20:07

speak. I'm not sure

20:09

which, partly. I think

20:11

my nerves had got wrong and

20:13

partly my humour was crossed. I

20:17

heard one of my examiners, heave

20:20

the braided Sertu whisper to

20:22

his co-professor, so she

20:25

is an idiot. Yes,

20:29

I thought, an idiot she

20:31

is, and always will

20:33

be for such as you. But

20:37

I suffered, suffered

20:39

cruelly. I

20:42

saw the damps gather on Monsieur

20:44

Paul's brow and his

20:47

eyes spoke a passionate yet

20:49

sad reproach. He

20:52

would not believe in my total

20:54

lack of popular cleverness. He

20:57

thought I could be prompted if I would.

21:02

At last, to relieve him, the

21:05

professors and myself, I

21:08

fammered out. I

21:11

hadn't been there. You had

21:13

better let me go. You

21:15

would get no good of me, does

21:17

he say? I'm

21:20

an idiot. I

21:24

wish I could have spoken with calm and

21:26

dignity, or I wish my

21:28

sense had sufficed to make me hold

21:30

my tong. That

21:33

traitor tong tripped, faltered.

21:38

Beholding the judges cast on the

21:40

sur manual, a

21:42

hard look of triumph, and

21:45

hearing the distressed tremor of my

21:47

own voice, I

21:49

burst in a fit of

21:51

choking tears. The

21:55

immersion was far more of

21:57

anger than grief, but I'd been a

21:59

man in so many ways. strong, they could have

22:01

challenged that pair on the spot.

22:04

But it was emotion, and I would

22:07

rather have been scourged than betray

22:09

it. The

22:14

Incapables. Could

22:17

they not see at once the

22:19

crude hand of a novice in

22:21

that composition they had called a

22:23

forgery? The subject was classical.

22:28

When Monsieur Paul dictated the trait

22:30

on which the essay was to

22:33

turn, I heard it

22:35

for the first time. The

22:37

matter was new to me. I

22:40

had no material for its treatment. But

22:44

I got books, read

22:46

up the facts, laboriously

22:49

constructed a skeleton out of

22:51

the dry bones of the reel, and

22:54

then clothed them, and

22:56

tried to breed them into

22:58

life. And in this last aim I

23:00

had pleasure. With

23:04

me it was a difficult and

23:06

anxious time till my facts were

23:09

found, selected, and

23:11

properly jointed. Nor

23:14

could I rest from research and

23:16

effort till I was

23:18

satisfied of correct anatomy. The

23:21

strength of my inward repugnance

23:23

to the idea of raw

23:26

or falsity sometimes

23:28

enabled me to shun

23:30

egregious blunders. But

23:33

the knowledge was not there in my

23:35

head, ready and

23:37

mellow. It

23:40

had not been sown in spring, grown

23:43

in summer, harvested

23:45

in autumn, and garnered

23:47

through winter. Whatever

23:50

I wanted I must go out and

23:53

gather fresh, glean

23:55

of wild herbs my lap for,

23:58

and shred them green. In a

24:00

pot. Matthew

24:04

Spicer can wash you know

24:07

didn't know to perceive as.

24:10

They mistook. My work for the work

24:12

of a bright scada. They

24:16

would not let me go. I

24:19

must sit down and right before them.

24:23

As I dipped my pen in

24:26

the in with the shaking hands

24:28

and surveys the white paper that

24:30

eyes past lying dead. And

24:32

days are slamming. One

24:35

of my churches began mint singly

24:38

to apologize for the pain he

24:40

caused. Reacting

24:43

zones cost of sauce We do not

24:45

want to watch you. Said.

24:48

He. Scored.

24:51

Gave me now as. Ionian

24:53

said. Dictate.

24:56

Miss you. Have

24:59

some more named his team. Team.

25:02

Injustice. Schumann

25:06

Justice. Because

25:08

I should make of it. Cold.

25:12

Abstraction on suggested

25:14

to. Me of One Inspiring

25:17

idea. And.

25:19

There stood issue. Emanuel.

25:22

Sad a soul and stern

25:24

as show up. And

25:27

that triumphed his accuse his.

25:31

These two I looked. I

25:34

was gathering my courage to tell

25:36

them that I would neither bright

25:39

know, speak another word for their

25:41

satisfaction. The esteem

25:43

did not seat. Know

25:45

that presents inspire me. and

25:48

isn't notwithstanding the weather's really

25:51

the shadow of doubt don't

25:53

miss your money while sauna

25:55

out raged that truth as

25:58

which they hadn't known hearts

26:00

themselves, the champions.

26:04

I meant to utter all this, I say, and

26:07

suddenly, a light

26:10

started on memory. Those

26:14

two faces, looking

26:17

out of the forest of long

26:19

hair, mustache and

26:21

whisker. Those

26:24

two cold, yet

26:26

bold, trustless,

26:28

yet presumptuous visitors,

26:32

were the same faces, the

26:34

very same that, projected

26:37

in full gaslight from behind

26:39

the pillars of a portico,

26:42

had half frightened me to

26:44

death on the night

26:46

of my desolate arrival in Valette. These

26:51

I felt morally certain,

26:54

were the very heroes who had

26:56

driven a friendless foreigner beyond

26:59

her reckoning and her strength, chased

27:02

her, breathless, over

27:05

a whole quarter of the town. Pious

27:10

Mentors, thought I, pure

27:13

guides for youth. If

27:16

human justice were what she ought to

27:19

be, you too would scarce hold your

27:21

present post or enjoy your

27:23

present credit. An

27:26

idea once seized, I

27:29

fell to work. Human

27:33

justice rushed before

27:35

me in novel guise, a

27:37

red, random bell-damn

27:40

with arms akimbo. I

27:43

saw her in her house, the

27:46

den of confusion. Servants

27:49

called to her for orders or help which

27:51

she did not give. Beggars

27:55

stood at her door waiting

27:57

and starving, Unnoticed.

28:01

Warm his children think

28:03

and quarrelsome cruel that

28:05

around half feet. And

28:08

yelled in her ears appeals

28:10

for notice. Sympathy.

28:13

Sure redress. The.

28:17

Honest woman cared for known as these

28:19

things. She

28:21

had a wound see to her own by

28:23

the fire. She

28:26

had our own solace in a

28:28

show, but. Pipe. In

28:31

bottle as Mrs. So

28:33

soothing Sarah. She

28:36

smoked. And she sit.

28:38

And she enjoyed. Her paradise.

28:42

And whenever a cry of the

28:44

suffering so. Who's about to

28:46

pierce terriers? To kill me. My

28:50

jolly dame seized. The

28:52

Poco the house branch. They

28:56

ascend to whistle week. Wrong

28:59

in sickly. Chef

29:01

actually settled him. As

29:05

he was strong. Life and

29:07

He violent. She

29:09

only managed and plunged her

29:12

hand deep. Pouch I'm still

29:14

on the liberals shower of

29:16

sugar plums. Such

29:21

was the sketches Human

29:23

Justice scratched pretty. On

29:26

paper. Placed at service

29:28

system suis pas sack and the

29:30

whole shimmer. The

29:33

sewer man new, well rather take my

29:35

shoulder. Waiting,

29:38

no comment. A cat seats to

29:41

the tree and and we the

29:43

true. But

29:46

the school that day the show

29:48

and die again. Matt. Course

29:52

the meeting didn't know what

29:54

first run smooth but there's

29:56

a crow to pluck with

29:58

him that forced examine. could

30:01

not be immediately digested.

30:03

The crabbed dialogue terminated in

30:05

my being called, Un petite

30:09

mercuise et sonceux, a little

30:12

mocking and heartless, and

30:16

in Monsieur's temporary departure. Not

30:21

wishing him to go quite away,

30:23

only desiring that he should feel

30:25

that such a transport as he

30:28

had that day given way to

30:31

could not be indulged with perfect

30:33

impunity, I was

30:35

not sorry to see him soon

30:38

after gardening in the

30:40

Belsol. He

30:43

approached the glass door. I drew

30:47

near also. He spoke

30:49

of some flowers growing round it. By

30:54

and by, Monsieur laid down his spade.

30:58

By and by, he recommenced

31:00

conversation, passed

31:03

to other subjects, and

31:06

at last touched a point

31:08

of interest. Conscious

31:12

that his proceeding of that

31:14

day was specially open to a

31:17

charge of extravagance, Monsieur

31:20

Paul half apologized. He

31:23

half regretted, too, the fitfulness

31:26

of his moods at all

31:28

times, that

31:30

he hinted that some allowance ought to be

31:32

made for him. But,

31:36

said he, I cannot be

31:38

expected at your hands, Miss Lucie.

31:42

You know neither me, nor

31:44

my position, nor my

31:46

history. It's

31:49

history. I took

31:51

up the word at once. I

31:54

pursued the idea. No,

31:57

Monsieur, I rejoined.

32:00

Of course, as you say, I

32:02

know neither your history nor

32:04

your position nor your

32:07

sacrifices nor

32:10

any of your sorrows or

32:12

trials, or affections or

32:15

fidelities. Oh

32:17

no, I know nothing

32:19

about you. You

32:22

offer me altogether a stranger." There,

32:27

he murmured, arching his

32:30

brows in surprise. You

32:34

know, Monsieur, I only see you

32:36

in class. Sten,

32:39

dogmatic, hasty,

32:41

imperious. I

32:46

only hear of you in town as

32:48

active and willful, quick

32:50

to originate, hasty

32:52

to lead, and as you, but

32:54

slow to persuade and hard to

32:56

bend. A

33:00

man like you, without

33:02

ties, can have no

33:04

attachments, without

33:07

dependents, no duties.

33:11

All we with whom you come

33:14

in contact are machines which

33:16

you thrust here and there, inconsiderate

33:20

of their feelings. You

33:23

seek your recreations in public

33:27

by the light of the evening chandelier.

33:31

This school and yonder college are your

33:33

workshops where you fabricate

33:36

the wear called pupils. I

33:40

don't so much as know where you live. It

33:43

is natural to take it for granted that you

33:45

have no home and need

33:47

none. I

33:51

am judged, said he. Your

33:55

opinion of me is just what I thought

33:57

it was. For

33:59

you? I am neither a

34:01

man nor a Christian. You

34:04

see me void of affection

34:06

and religion, unattached

34:09

by friend or family, unpiloted

34:12

by principle or faith. It

34:17

is well, Mademoiselle, such

34:19

is our reward in this life. You

34:23

were a philosopher, Monsieur, a

34:26

cynic philosopher, and

34:29

I looked at his palatore of

34:31

which he straight away brushed a

34:33

dim sleeve with his hand, despising

34:37

the foibles of humanity above

34:40

its luxuries, independent

34:42

of its comforts. Evo,

34:46

Mademoiselle, you are

34:48

clean and cozy and horribly insensitive

34:50

to boot, but in

34:52

short, Monsieur, now I think that you

34:56

must live somewhere. Do

34:59

tell me where and what

35:01

establishment of servants do you keep? With

35:06

a fearful projection of the

35:08

underlap, implying an impetus of scorn,

35:10

the most decided, he

35:12

broke out. Y

35:17

viedre en trois. I live in a hole. A

35:20

in a better den, miss,

35:22

a cavern, where you would not put

35:24

your dainty nose. Once with

35:26

base shame of speaking the old

35:29

truth, I talked about my study in

35:32

that college. Now

35:34

know that this study is my all-abold.

35:38

My chamber is there

35:40

in my drawing room. As

35:45

for my establishment of servants,

35:47

mimicking my voice. Re-number

35:52

ten dies voilà. His

35:56

grimness. spread

36:01

close under my eyes his ten

36:03

fingers. I

36:07

like my boots, pursuity

36:10

savagely. I brush

36:13

my palidot. No,

36:15

monsieur, it's too

36:17

plain. You never do

36:19

that, with my

36:21

parenthesis. I

36:24

make my bed and my housework. I

36:28

seek my dinner in a restaurant. My

36:31

supper takes care of itself. A

36:34

past base, laborious

36:37

and loveless, nights,

36:40

long and lonely. I

36:43

am ferocious and bearded

36:45

and monkish, and

36:48

nothing now living in this world loves me,

36:51

except some old arts worn

36:54

like my own, and

36:56

some few beings impoverished,

37:00

suffering, poor in

37:02

birth and in spirit, whom

37:04

the kingdoms of this world own

37:06

not. A

37:09

too-oomer will and testament not

37:12

to be disputed as bequeathed

37:15

the kingdom of heaven. I

37:17

am, monsieur, but I

37:20

know. What

37:22

do you know? Many

37:24

things I very early believe yet, not

37:27

me, Lucy. I know that

37:29

you have a pleasant old house,

37:32

in a pleasant old square of the Basque.

37:36

Why don't you go and live there? Eh,

37:41

muttered he again. I liked

37:44

it much, monsieur, with

37:47

the steps ascending to

37:49

the door, the

37:51

grey flags in front, the

37:54

nodding trees behind, real

37:57

trees or shrubs. Trees

38:01

dark, high and

38:03

of old growth, and

38:06

the boudoir a retoir. You

38:09

should make that room your study. She's

38:12

so quiet and solemn." He

38:17

eyed me closely. He

38:20

half smiled, half

38:22

colored. Well,

38:26

did you pick up all that? We

38:29

told you. He asked.

38:33

Nobody told me. Did

38:37

I dream it, Monsieur, do you think? Can

38:41

I enter into your visions? Can

38:45

I guess a woman's waking thoughts,

38:48

much less a sleeping fantasy? If

38:52

I dreamt it, I

38:54

saw in my dream human beings

38:57

as well as a house. I

39:01

saw a priest, old,

39:05

bent and grey, and

39:08

a domestic, old

39:11

too, and picturesque.

39:16

And a lady, splendid but

39:18

strange. Her

39:20

head would scarce reach to my elbow. Her

39:24

magnificence might ransom a duke.

39:29

She wore a gown, bright

39:31

as la piece la zulie, a

39:36

shawl worth a thousand francs. She

39:40

was decked with ornaments so

39:42

brilliant I never saw any with

39:45

such a beautiful sparkle. But

39:49

her figure looked as if it had been broken in

39:51

two, and bent double. She

39:56

seemed also to have outlived the

39:58

common years of humanity. and

40:01

have attained those which are only

40:03

labour and sorrow. She

40:07

was become morose, almost

40:11

malevolent. Yet

40:14

somebody, it appears, cared

40:17

for her in her infirmities. She

40:22

forgave her trespasses, hoping

40:25

to have his trespasses

40:27

forgiven. They

40:31

lived together, these three people, the

40:34

mistress, chaplain, the

40:37

servant, all

40:39

rolled, all feeble,

40:43

all sheltered under one

40:46

kind wing. He

40:51

covered with his hand the upper part of

40:53

his face, but

40:55

did not conceal his mouth where

40:58

I saw hovering an expression

41:00

I liked. I

41:04

see you have entered into my secret, said

41:08

he. How

41:10

was he done? So

41:13

I told him how, the commission

41:15

on which I had been sent,

41:18

the storm which had detained me,

41:22

the abruptness of the lady, the kindness

41:25

of the priest. As

41:29

I sat waiting for the rain to cease, Per

41:32

Cylus whiled away the time with a

41:35

story. I

41:37

said, the story. What

41:41

story? Per Cylus

41:43

is no romances? Shall

41:47

I tell Mr. The Tale? Yes,

41:52

begin at the beginning. Let

41:55

me some of Miss Lucy's French, a

41:58

bastard or a worst. don't

42:00

much care which. Let

42:03

us have a good wagner

42:05

of barbarisms and a bounteous

42:07

dose of an

42:09

insular accent. Monsieur

42:13

is not going to be gratified by

42:15

a tale of ambitious proportions, the

42:17

spectacle of the narrator sticking

42:20

fast in the midst. But

42:23

I will tell him the title. The

42:28

priest's pupil. Barf,

42:31

said he, the swarthy

42:33

slush again dying his dark

42:36

cheek. The

42:38

good old father could not have chosen

42:40

a worse subject. This

42:42

is weak point. Barf, but

42:45

what of the priest's pupil? Many

42:49

things. You

42:52

may as well define what things I

42:54

mean to know. There

42:57

was the pupil's youth, the

43:00

pupil's manhood, his

43:03

avarice, his ingratitude,

43:06

his implacability, his inconsistency.

43:12

Such bad people, Monsieur. So

43:16

thankless, cold-hearted,

43:18

unshivalrous, unforgiving,

43:21

the priest said

43:23

he taking a cigar. Eppui,

43:29

I pursued. He

43:32

underwent calamities which one did

43:34

not pity. Bored

43:37

them in a spirit one did not admire.

43:41

Endured wrongs for which one felt

43:43

no sympathy. Finally,

43:47

took the unchristian revenge of

43:49

heaping coals of fire on

43:51

his adversary's head. You

43:56

have not told me on, said

43:58

he. really all

44:00

I think, have

44:02

indicated the heads of Per

44:04

Cylus's chapters. You

44:08

have forgotten one, that

44:10

which touched on the people's lack of

44:12

affection, on his head,

44:15

cold, monkish heart.

44:19

True. I

44:21

remember now. Per

44:23

Cylus did say that his vocation was

44:25

almost that of a priest,

44:29

that his life was considered consecrated.

44:34

By what bonds or duties? By

44:38

the ties of the past and

44:41

the charities of the present. You

44:45

have the Zuol situation?

44:50

I have now told Mr. Orel that was told me. Some

44:56

meditative minutes passed. Now

45:02

Mademoiselle Lucie, look

45:04

at me. And

45:07

with that truth which I

45:09

believe you never knowing leave

45:11

related, answer

45:13

me one question. Raise

45:16

your hands. Rest

45:18

them on mine. Have

45:20

no hesitation. Fear

45:23

not to trust me. I

45:26

am a man to be trusted. I

45:29

raised my eyes. Knowing

45:34

me. So rarely know.

45:37

All my untickidance. All

45:41

my responsibilities. Having

45:44

long known my faults. Can

45:48

you and I still be friends? If

45:52

Monsieur wants a friend in me, I

45:55

shall be glad to have a friend

45:57

in him. But

46:00

a close friend, I mean. Intimate

46:03

and real. Kindred

46:05

in all but blood. Will

46:09

Miss Lucy be the sister

46:11

of a very poor, fatterd,

46:14

bell-doned, encumbered man? Could

46:19

not answer him in words, yet

46:22

I suppose I did answer him. She

46:26

took my hand which found comfort in

46:28

the shelter of his. His

46:31

friendship was not a doubtful,

46:34

wavering benefit. Cold,

46:38

distant hope. A

46:41

sentiment so brittle as not to bear

46:43

the weight of a finger. It

46:47

once felt, or thought

46:49

I felt, its support. Like

46:52

a act of some rock. When

46:56

I dog of friendship, I mean true

46:59

friendship. He

47:01

repeated emphatically. And

47:04

I could hardly believe that words so

47:06

earnest had blessed my ear. I

47:10

could hardly credit the reality of

47:12

that kind, anxious

47:14

look he gave. If

47:19

he really wished for my confidence

47:21

and regard, and really

47:23

would give me his, why it

47:26

seemed to me that life could offer

47:28

nothing more or better. In

47:32

that case, I was become strong

47:35

and rich. In

47:38

a moment, I was made

47:40

substantially happy. To

47:44

ascertain the fact, to fix

47:46

and seal it, I asked. Is

47:50

Miss Year quite serious? Does

47:53

he really think he needs me, and

47:55

can take an interest in me as

47:58

a sister? For

48:00

surely, surely, said

48:03

he, a lonely

48:05

man like me who has no sister, must

48:09

be but too glad to find

48:11

in some woman's heart a sister's

48:13

pure affection. And

48:17

there I rely on Monsieur's

48:19

regard. There I speak to him when

48:21

I am so inclined. My

48:24

little sister must make our own

48:26

experiment, said he. I will

48:29

give no promises. She

48:32

must ease and try her wayward brother

48:34

until she has drilled him into what

48:37

she wishes. After

48:39

all, he is no inductile

48:41

material in some hands. While

48:46

he spoke, the tone

48:48

of his voice, the light of

48:50

his now affectionate eye, gave

48:53

me such a pleasure as certainly

48:55

I have never felt. I

48:59

envied no girl her lover, no

49:02

bride her bridegroom, no wife

49:06

her husband. I

49:08

was content with this, my

49:11

voluntary, self-offering friend.

49:15

If he would but prove reliable, and

49:18

he looked reliable, what

49:21

beyond his friendship could I ever cover?

49:26

But if all melted like a dream

49:28

as once

49:31

before had

49:33

happened. "'Dessedonk?

49:35

What is it?' said he,

49:38

as this thought threw its weight on my

49:41

heart, its shadow

49:43

on my countenance. I

49:47

told him, and after a

49:50

moment's pause and a thoughtful smile,

49:53

he showed me how an equal fear, lest

49:56

I should weary of him, man

49:59

of moods." so difficult

50:01

and fitful, but haunted

50:03

his mind for more than one day

50:05

or one month. On

50:09

hearing this, a quiet

50:12

courage cheered me. I

50:15

ventured a word of reassurance. That

50:20

word was not only tolerated,

50:22

its repetition was courted. He

50:26

grew quite happy, strangely

50:28

happy, in making him

50:31

secure, content, tranquil.

50:38

Yesterday I could not have believed

50:40

that Earth held or

50:42

life afforded moments like

50:44

the few I was now passing. At

50:49

countless times, it had

50:51

been my lot to watch

50:53

apprehended sorrow close darkly

50:55

in, but

50:58

to see unhoped-for happiness

51:00

take form, find

51:03

place, and grow more

51:05

real as the seconds sped was

51:08

indeed a new experience. Lucy,

51:14

sad Monsieur Paul, speaking

51:16

low and still holding my

51:18

hands. Did

51:21

you see a picture in the boudoir of the

51:23

old house? It

51:25

did, a picture painted on a

51:27

panel, the portrait of

51:29

a nun. Yes,

51:33

you heard our history. Yes.

51:37

You remember what we saw that night

51:39

in the B I

51:57

shall never forget it. nor

52:01

will you fancy, pursued

52:03

he, at a saint

52:06

in heaven perturbed herself with

52:08

rivalries of earth. Protestants

52:11

are really superstitious. These

52:14

morbid fancies will not beset you." I

52:18

know not what to think of this matter, but

52:22

I believe it a perfectly natural

52:24

solution of this seeming mystery will

52:27

one day be arrived at. Doubtless,

52:31

doubtless. Besides

52:33

no good living woman, much less

52:35

a pure, happy spirit, would

52:39

trouble armadine like ours. N'il

52:41

d'afre. I could answer. Fifine,

52:48

Beck, Burstyn, Rosie

52:51

and abrupt, calling out that I

52:53

was wanted. Her

52:55

mother was going into town to call

52:58

on some English family who had

53:00

applied for a prospectus.

53:02

My services were needed as interpreter. The

53:07

interruption was not unseasonable. Sufficient

53:11

for the day is always

53:13

the evil. For

53:15

this hour, its good

53:17

sufficed. Yet

53:20

I should like to have asked

53:22

Monsieur Paul whether the morbid fancies

53:25

against which he warned

53:27

me wrought In his

53:29

own brain. You

56:30

You You

57:30

You you

58:30

you you

59:30

you you