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1:04

The Squareball Podcast.

1:08

Hello and welcome to the show. It's brought to you in

1:11

association with... Levi's

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Solicitors. Yep, they will offer you a 10% discount

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on your legal fees at levisolicitors.co.uk forward slash

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the square ball. That sounds like a great offer

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to me. Do you know what's even better?

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Um, a Phil

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do it. I was reading something.

1:32

Go back to the Phil Hay Monday Club, 15% off.

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What are the big three?

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Wells Probit Conveyancing. Well done, Michael.

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Big three, doesn't matter what division you're in either. Still the big three. They

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are, very much so. Yeah, 15% off on those if

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you want to get the code for that.

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Head over to the Phil Hay Monday Club, which is

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in your YouTube feed and on your

1:48

audio feed as well. Propaganda,

1:51

where we find out what's been said, what's

1:53

been put out in the football world across

1:56

the last seven days.

1:58

Much sadness. Do we need to give a...

1:59

content warning for this one. This is where we're going to fully

2:02

lead into the misery and the anger and the bitterness

2:04

today. I

2:05

mean, these were all because we've tried to avoid it. Yeah,

2:08

these were all received ahead of the new castle

2:10

Lester game, which is obviously put an extra

2:12

nail in hasn't it? Yeah. Because it was, I

2:15

guess you just relying on one result then,

2:17

but now we need two results, three results to

2:19

go for us. Newcastle was so annoying in that

2:22

match. I didn't watch it. Score. Did

2:24

it? How many times did they, the woodwork? Was it about five times?

2:26

It just like by the,

2:29

it started off being quite entertaining

2:31

because you think, Oh, they're going to batter Lester here. And

2:33

then by the, as it was getting the end, it was just

2:36

like you pathetic bunch of idiots.

2:38

They don't deserve to be in the champions league full

2:40

stop, but they certainly don't. After that, there

2:43

should be like a ruling that says that

2:45

game just denies

2:47

you entry to the champions league. You've got to prove it again

2:49

next week instead. Yeah, there should. Yeah.

2:51

It should be, um, it should

2:53

not be confirmed until who does he play

2:55

next week? Someone else, right? They've

2:57

got to beat that team. Otherwise it can't be allowed

2:59

in. Oh, that's fair. Yeah. Cause

3:02

they only needed a point that they had to qualify. So this started

3:05

accepting the point when it got towards the backend of the,

3:07

uh, and I said, now we have to put up with

3:09

all, it's all like Dean Smith football genius

3:11

because he let Lester have, well,

3:14

apparently he lets Lester out. This is like when,

3:16

um, was it, uh, Steve

3:18

Cooper, Steve Cooper, um, you know,

3:21

exactly what I'm talking about. The Swansea game where he reckoned

3:23

he played for a one, one draw with

3:25

a own goal in the 94th minute.

3:27

I deliberately let them have all those chances early on that

3:29

they chose to miss because I knew they would. That's how

3:31

kind of how it's gone last night of, um,

3:33

you know, Newcastle hit the bar and the post

3:36

so many times. And then when it got

3:38

to 90 minutes at nil, nil,

3:40

Lester had five minutes in stoppage time

3:42

of trying to win. And it was all Dean

3:44

Smith's really frightened Newcastle here. No, if

3:46

they'd scored a goal in the first half, like

3:49

none of that would have been

3:50

relevant. I mean, I'm

3:52

not, I wasn't even annoyed at that result last night

3:54

because it just went, Oh, well, that

3:56

makes no odds. We, we, we, since so many

3:58

bots.

3:59

in my mind. I know it's mathematically

4:02

impossible, but I feel like we might contrive to do it on the

4:04

last set. I got points deduction or something just

4:06

in some way. Yeah. It dawned on me last

4:08

night that I was like tidying the kitchen just before

4:10

I went to bed and putting stuff in the dishwasher.

4:12

And I thought,

4:13

not even bother. I've been stressed all year about staying

4:15

in the premier league and now we're falling out of it.

4:18

Almost certainly. I was kind of, Oh, well, and

4:21

also you look at the table and

4:22

we're on 31 points. The most we're going to get to is 34

4:25

with a pathetic goal difference. You

4:27

can't look at anything this season and feel hard

4:29

done so can you can just look at our last

4:32

nine games or something as all that we failed to win in. And you

4:34

just go, there

4:35

you go. Of course, of course, but,

4:38

but still want to stay up. What's

4:42

the, what's your dickhead website? So

4:44

I even go, is it like 3%? We know it's, we

4:47

know it's a stupidly small chance, but it's

4:49

really simple though.

4:51

All that's got to happen is ever

4:53

and, and Lester lose and we win.

4:55

Yeah. And when you look over

4:58

the course of a season, ever and have lost loads

5:00

of games, Lester have lost loads of games.

5:03

We've lost loads of games, but they they've

5:05

recently won games. We have not won games recently.

5:08

So we're overdue one. We are overdue one.

5:10

And it's sort of, it happened last season. We

5:12

needed to win and we needed results to go

5:15

away and we hadn't won.

5:17

Maybe I think I remember saying this when

5:19

I was talking about, we could stay up without winning

5:21

another game. It would have been ages at that

5:23

point. We've tried the not winning another game,

5:25

but we did that last year as well. We got, we went ages

5:28

without, getting any sort of result. We've got

5:30

a couple of draws here and there.

5:31

And then, you know, it's very understandable.

5:34

The idea of just saying, well, it's over. There's no

5:36

point even

5:37

bothering with Sunday, but the last

5:39

day of the Premier league,

5:41

the, the relegation battle,

5:43

every time that comes, it's always, it's

5:46

never as simple as it just goes.

5:48

Everybody stays in the same place and it's just, you

5:51

know, the games kick off and they go exactly to

5:53

form. Now, I remember

5:54

Everton versus, was

5:56

it Wimbledon? Where there was all that hand-saving stuff. 1995.

5:59

going back to. That's one, the classic one that people

6:02

go back to. Just a mere 28 years ago. But

6:04

even last year with

6:07

Burnley having players sent off and Brentford

6:10

going down to nine and nobody even

6:12

knew like Jesse Marsh was trying to tell

6:14

our players, they've only got nine

6:16

and all our players look around going, what do you mean? Nobody

6:19

knew that Sergei Kallis had been sent off. He's doing

6:21

German again. That's the other man. Well,

6:24

so the map, there is the last day is always

6:26

a day where there is madness is available

6:29

and for all the permutations, I know it's very,

6:32

very, very, very slim. But when

6:34

you just drill down to what has to happen,

6:37

leads win two other teams lose.

6:39

Lest I can even draw the luxury

6:41

of a draw, we can stay up. This is a 95%

6:43

chance of us going down. So

6:46

say five 38.com, which is what Michael was referring

6:48

to before, which means that in 19

6:51

scenarios out of 20, we don't survive. So

6:53

it is a slim chance. We're probably going

6:56

down. I think fair to say. Yeah.

6:58

Keep looking to my left. I've got the big screen

7:00

where you're recording the podcast into audition.

7:03

And there's a bit that says zero

7:05

problems detected. And

7:06

I get my eye keeps being drawn to that.

7:09

And that's a lie. We have

7:11

lots of problems. I don't think we can solve

7:14

them. Got more problems than the, than Jay

7:16

Z.

7:18

Anyway.

7:18

So Michael, what have we got on this week's propaganda?

7:21

Do we do the mega mix? And it definitely is a mega

7:23

mix of misery. Isn't it this week? Yeah. There's, there's

7:26

not a lot of hope. I think maybe there might be

7:28

one person who's got a bit of the Moscow

7:30

as anything can happen about them. But generally speaking,

7:33

no,

7:33

it's bad fucking

7:36

shot. Honestly, Lance, what

7:38

the fuck was that? Went

7:41

in front, better side game

7:43

was there to be one, let them back into

7:45

it. No fight, no passion,

7:48

no hope. Well lads, it's

7:51

nearly done. Another shit

7:54

show of the season. We've not

7:56

much to write home about. And

7:59

to be honest, They can all go

8:01

on the push all the days and fuck

8:04

off for me. I knew it was going to be bad

8:06

when one of my parishioners told me at the end of church,

8:09

hey, you might not want to look at the

8:11

lead scorer right now.

8:13

Oh dear.

8:15

In the words of my much beloved

8:17

late father,

8:19

well, shit. It

8:21

really is quite something to go

8:23

from being the best coached,

8:26

most coached team under the BLS

8:28

to be uncoached. Like

8:32

Marsh basically uncoached us for

8:35

fucking months. Christ

8:38

almighty. The players have lost. They don't know

8:40

what's coming next. They don't know where to be on the pitch. They don't know how

8:42

to pass each other. Oh God. Fucking relegation.

8:44

I had a funny thought on my nightly

8:47

dog walk.

8:52

You know, people are saying, oh

8:55

well, if we get them out of the gate, at least we're going

8:57

to win a load of games next season, we'll hang

8:59

on to most of our players. We can play some of the youth

9:01

team, really get them good experience in the championship.

9:05

What if it's not that simple? Is it

9:08

too early to be thinking about this kind of stuff?

9:10

If we just never have a plan about to have

9:13

the ball, we can never win a game

9:15

in the championship have I gone too

9:17

much like Michael, kind of do a escalation

9:19

here. We looked every single

9:21

bit at a relegated side. We

9:24

looked like bottom three fodder today. They

9:26

completely dominated. We score the goal,

9:28

great early goal. And like every other game, you know,

9:31

that just means absolutely nothing. We

9:33

spend the next 15 minutes

9:36

being limp and allowing them to

9:38

control the game. Of course, they get the equaliser.

9:41

You know what? Champs next year. I'm

9:43

coming over from Australia, coming over in November,

9:46

getting my leads to do. I'm a fucking idiot. I

9:48

love this club. I've

9:50

been thinking for several weeks that we're going to be relegated.

9:52

I did think that for a lot of last season as well. But

9:55

you know, maybe this is just the way that I have to protect

9:57

myself from disappointment. just

10:00

that, you know, we're still alive,

10:02

essentially, because individual moments can

10:05

change a season when there's so few points

10:07

on the board, right? Like if, if Bamford

10:09

puts in that goal against Leicester,

10:12

like the for one yard, then

10:14

we stay, you know, we stay up maybe. And

10:16

I suppose it's also like that at the

10:18

other end, like, you know, if, if

10:21

Kiko Kaseya doesn't run into the back of Liam Cooper,

10:24

maybe we win that semi final, we're promoted a season

10:26

earlier.

10:28

You know, in both cases, Leeds makes you tear

10:30

your hair out. But I would much rather

10:32

be in the case where we're at least

10:34

playing well some of the time, because tuning into

10:36

games, I don't want to watch is just getting tiresome.

10:39

Absolutely. I

10:41

think that's the thing. The stat about we've won 11

10:43

games since Beelzer left,

10:44

you really feel it, don't you? Yeah. Every

10:47

week you just think, didn't win many

10:49

before he went either. No, it's basically

10:51

been two full seasons of losing games, isn't it? Stop

10:54

being much fun, is it? Right pastings in

10:57

there as well. And the Premier League barring that

10:59

first season, even then people are misremembering how

11:01

much fun it was. It wasn't that much fun until we

11:03

got probably to about February,

11:05

March time when you thought we might do this. And even then

11:07

it took a long time for people to fully believe that we

11:09

were going to stay up. I think it's when we beat Fulham, wasn't it?

11:12

That we got

11:13

to 32 points and there was a 10 point

11:15

gap or something to the bottom three and everyone was like, okay, but

11:17

what if they're stringed together three wins? I think this,

11:19

I think this will probably be all right now. Also,

11:21

we weren't there.

11:22

Yeah, that goes under the radar a little

11:25

bit. I think that there was always the, the

11:27

quote attributed to Victor Orta that

11:29

if we'd got relegated in the season when we weren't

11:31

allowed in, he was going to throw himself

11:33

in the river.

11:34

And then given that the way that the team

11:36

has actually played since we were allowed back in,

11:38

it's gone down at that point. No point, no

11:40

point keeping us in the division so that we could all come back

11:43

and see that the river still there, Victor, by the way,

11:45

it does say stay in it. It just said

11:48

he'd probably do like a people

11:50

keep doing it. Your races don't in jumping

11:53

splash about and then get out again safely.

11:55

Yeah, fair enough. Shake all the water off

11:57

like a dog on the riverbank.

12:01

I

12:01

do wonder if my ambivalence is just

12:04

down to what the Premier League is

12:06

and has become in our absence.

12:07

It's because it's not a very lovable thing. It's very corporate.

12:10

It's very sterile. Things like the Premier League

12:12

anthem. I hate VAR. I hate it. It's

12:14

been great watching lots of great footballers come to Ellen Road.

12:16

Unfortunately, it's not been great watching them take

12:18

us apart most of the time. So

12:20

I can do without that. I mean, I can watch them on

12:22

my telly if I want to. That's the thing. I don't

12:24

have to go to Ellen Road to watch them. I'm a bit miserable. We

12:27

can go back to what I used to say

12:29

before we got promoted, which was that my dream

12:31

scenario would be winning the championship

12:33

every year and then staying in the championship to defend

12:35

it. It'd be the best team in the championship. And don't

12:37

worry about

12:38

getting involved in the Premier League because

12:41

trying to break into the top half,

12:44

you know, it's a little bit distorted

12:46

this year because

12:47

Brighton and Brentford have both done it,

12:50

but they've both done it after particularly

12:52

in Brighton's case. It's taken years. We

12:54

were torn about them, never being able to win more than nine

12:57

games a season. And then it turns out

12:59

that while they were doing that, they were actually building a really

13:01

strong club in the background, but it takes

13:03

years and half a billion pounds and

13:06

a lot of money. And then Brentford, similar

13:08

thing they did most of their

13:09

growing in the championship.

13:12

So that they arrived in decent condition

13:15

in the Premier League, but it's still because

13:17

they've gone up and it's been two seasons, fish

13:19

bash. It looks like overnight success,

13:22

but those things do take a long,

13:25

long time, which

13:26

is maybe part of the problem at Leeds because

13:29

after

13:30

once we got to this idea of the 49ers

13:32

taking over by a certain date, all

13:35

the timeframe shift, you no

13:37

longer on

13:38

a long-term project of like we're planning

13:40

for 10 years

13:41

in the Premier League doing this.

13:43

It's we're planning until somebody else

13:45

comes in and starts another plan. So

13:47

long-term ability to break into

13:49

what's going on at the top of the table was

13:52

kind of became, we made that more

13:54

difficult for ourselves. And now look, I

13:56

like what you wrote on the blog about that. I did like it

13:58

because yeah, we forgot to 10.

13:59

to the here and now because we were planning for a future that

14:02

now won't arrive as many people thought.

14:04

But it's funny, isn't it? Like looking at like Brentford

14:06

and leaving Brighton, maybe to an extent, you

14:08

wonder where will they be in five years time? Will

14:11

they be able to sustain top six, seven?

14:13

Well, it's tough, isn't it? Look at, look at who's going down this

14:15

year, like Lester and Southampton were for years, well

14:17

run clubs, the Lester model. Southampton have

14:19

tried, they were obviously in the same transfer

14:22

market as us

14:23

for a couple of years, trying to buy the same players, people who

14:25

could get from, who were doing well

14:27

in France or whatever. And you buy them for 12 million

14:30

and you

14:30

do well and you sell them on and it

14:32

works till it doesn't. Yeah. Southampton have done

14:34

exactly what we were trying to do this year more

14:37

than they have done in previous seasons. I think they've had the

14:39

balance

14:40

better in previous years, because obviously they've

14:43

been mid table, but we're Ralph

14:45

Hasen, her all pure red ball

14:47

running through his veins.

14:48

And then the idea of that being the

14:51

right

14:51

style of football

14:53

to develop young footballers.

14:56

And then they got this mad intake of kids

14:58

basically. And that team

15:00

feels a little bit like ours in the way that

15:02

Sam Allardyce was struggling with the squad against

15:04

West Ham, where he

15:06

is clear with Allardyce. He's put the most experienced

15:08

team he can on the pitch in every single

15:10

game. Rob Les is there. Harrison

15:13

plays no matter what Rodrigo starts

15:16

for sure starts when he's fit. It's all

15:18

who's basically who is oldest and

15:20

fit.

15:21

And then when he turns around and then

15:23

maybe it's coincidence, maybe it's not, but once players

15:25

like Somerville and Yanto and

15:27

Greenwood start the

15:30

emphasis on the pitch moves, the younger

15:32

end

15:32

were not as good because they just aren't as experienced

15:35

at the Premier league. And they've never been in a, they've

15:37

never been put in the situation of trying to battle

15:39

against relegation before. And Southampton have done exactly

15:41

the same where they've got the old one, Shay Adams, James

15:44

Willprouse,

15:45

Kyle Walker Peters, other people with triple

15:47

paragraph names, and then just a bunch of, you

15:50

know, 20

15:50

year olds and Lavia

15:52

looks like a fantastic player, but he

15:54

would be better for what they were going through

15:56

in five years rather than now.

15:59

And so neither is and really had a plan to get

16:01

through where we are now so that

16:03

the young players at the board can be any

16:06

use because now they just get

16:08

sold to somebody else. And part of the

16:10

reliance on that method is that the teams

16:12

that come up

16:13

at least a couple of them bounce straight back down and

16:16

they've not done that this year. So it's kind of ruined it. Yeah.

16:18

But yeah, I mean, you're looking at those teams and just going back to the point on like Brighton

16:21

and Brentford Brighton are probably like you said, cause they've

16:23

been here longer or

16:24

ensured against it a bit more, but

16:27

you wonder what happens to Brentford post Thomas

16:29

Frank. They're one coaching appointment away from

16:31

maybe

16:32

tipping the other way a little bit. Same could be said for

16:34

Brighton if they continue to sell people, but the model doesn't

16:37

quite sustain itself or they hit

16:39

one bad year or the next coaching appointment

16:41

doesn't quite work in the same way. But then

16:43

you could say the same of

16:45

Fulham palace, even

16:47

wolves, we're going down the entire division in that bottom

16:49

half right down to including ever a new

16:51

adjust outside the bottom three at the minute.

16:53

None of them are particularly the one bad year

16:55

away from being in a lot of trouble. Aren't these horrible? You

16:58

were saying earlier in the season, weren't you that to get relegated,

17:01

you normally have to do something

17:02

worse than just being bad.

17:04

And we've successfully done that. Yeah. We really caught

17:06

up because at the time I was

17:08

saying, it did just seem like we just had a bad team.

17:11

That was pretty much the limit

17:13

of it. But then

17:14

the way it has unraveled quite

17:16

quickly and just how bad that team

17:18

was has really become

17:20

much clearer. Yeah. But of course the season.

17:22

Well, on that, let's hear from Luke Haley in post-match.

17:25

Yeah, very disappointed. We started the

17:27

game well, we got one go up and then

17:29

we can see the goal again and then

17:32

we come out half time and we feel OK and then the

17:34

second half is just not good enough. We just, you

17:36

know, like we just can't seem to go again, you know, then

17:39

we put so much into the first half

17:41

and in the second half we just have nothing. Yeah,

17:44

so it's very disappointing. Yeah. You said that you

17:46

start the game so well with such intensity.

17:49

Can you put your finger on where

17:51

that has slipped?

17:53

Yeah, I didn't know like I think in you goes past

17:55

and I think teams have feared us

17:57

when it comes to a running point of view and I

17:59

think. and stuff and like

18:02

just don't feel like it's there. Then

18:04

like this season, then

18:07

we start so well, we started bright, we score a

18:09

goal, then they score

18:11

a goal. Then just didn't

18:14

like that can happen at this level, but then we come out for a second

18:16

half and then like, we just can't go again. So

18:19

yeah, it's just, yeah, just

18:22

very disappointing.

18:24

Can't seem to go again, have nothing. In

18:26

years past teams have feared our running and fitness, things

18:28

from that point of view, but that's just not there. Do

18:31

we go back to last summer

18:32

and the lack of prep

18:34

work? Well, we had

18:37

to bring in someone who would do less physical

18:39

fitness work, didn't we? And then may

18:41

have swung too far the other way. Well, that's,

18:43

I mean, that's the thing. And it's not just last summer

18:46

because this season, we had pre-season,

18:49

we had the queen season, we had the

18:51

world cup, where they all went to Spain and did some training.

18:53

So three chances to

18:55

get everybody fit. Staff as well, Moscow, you've mentioned

18:57

staff before. Yeah, but it's

19:00

sort of, it's weird.

19:02

It was mentioned, this was mentioned on the Guardian

19:05

Football Weekly and podcasts. I was listening

19:07

to that this morning. They put it down to still, well,

19:09

Beelzer burned them out as if that's still

19:12

the problem and he ruins the fitness of footballers.

19:14

He didn't burn Western McKinney and Mark Rocker out, did he? No,

19:17

exactly. And I think the

19:19

problem is it comes

19:21

a step after that and it's where everything comes

19:23

down to. It's the choice of Jesse Marsh to

19:25

replace Marcelo Beelzer. And

19:27

it's not even, this isn't really criticism

19:30

of Marsh himself.

19:32

I think we flagged this when he turned up.

19:34

There's all the interviews from his former players,

19:36

where they talk about what Jesse Marsh

19:38

does when he goes into a team and what

19:40

his unique selling point is.

19:42

There's a lot of people out there who will say, talk about how his

19:44

pre-seasons are the hardest that players have

19:46

ever had. He works them like no

19:49

other coach. He really gets the fitness

19:51

levels up there. They're drained in pre-season,

19:54

like basically what Beelzer did.

19:56

And he was the choice to

19:58

reduce.

19:59

the training levels to something

20:02

more manageable. And that's not something

20:04

he's ever done before. And because his,

20:07

one of his main tools

20:08

is he goes into a club

20:10

and he increases the training levels to make everybody

20:12

fitter.

20:13

One of his major tools to improve a team is taken

20:15

away because you couldn't really make the else's team

20:18

any fitter. There's no, you can't increase Jack

20:20

Harrison's fitness beyond where it was.

20:23

But then also you're asking him to then reduce the

20:25

stress levels or the over-training levels and it's not

20:27

something that it's not something he does.

20:30

So you've just put completely the wrong person

20:32

in

20:33

to solve whatever the problem was,

20:35

if, if fitness was a problem, if over-training

20:37

was a problem, Jesse Marsh was not the solution

20:40

because all he would do at his previous teams

20:42

is train

20:43

people harder. And then he's the one saying

20:45

they've been over-trained. I've got to reduce the training.

20:48

How are you going to do that? Well, it's not something he's ever done before.

20:50

And it was all different. It was a different type of training as well. I think

20:52

that's when you start to get into the nuance of it, it

20:54

was all about explosive runs to

20:56

press a ball. So three of you doing the all in thing,

20:59

you know, where you're swamping people to make

21:01

recoveries, ball recoveries, as opposed

21:03

to let's say stamina work, you know,

21:05

cause we know famously that the outside, the running track putting up

21:07

the Thorpe arch. And that's obviously going

21:10

to build up long-term stamina. And I'm sure it's absolutely no

21:12

fun, but it's the basis of any good season. Isn't it is long-term

21:15

stamina as you know, as we will testify. I'm sure.

21:18

That's what when Marsh came in

21:19

at other clubs, he's had coaching staff.

21:22

He arrived at Leeds with like, well, we we've

21:24

got

21:25

Cameron Toshack. That's what I mean about staff. I

21:27

said to myself, can step up. Like if he

21:30

normally relied upon

21:31

those people to do a lot of the work for him,

21:33

which is not unusual, I don't think in coaching

21:35

a lot of, a lot of managers over the years, a lot

21:38

of managers over the years have essentially had some broad

21:41

ideas, but then they delegate stuff

21:43

to coaching staff and they have to do it. And if the coaching

21:46

staff

21:46

aren't used to doing it in the way you wanted it to be done

21:48

or simply not there, or

21:50

simply not there, they just weren't there with it for

21:52

a long time. So, yeah, even this

21:54

summer, I mean, this needs picking everything

21:56

the season really, but like the late appointments

21:58

of

21:59

his team.

21:59

for this season. I know there was the emergency

22:02

stuff last year, but then you have someone to get it right. And even

22:04

even then you're waiting around for fucking

22:06

Chris Armist to eventually become available.

22:08

And then he turns up and it's too bloody late and

22:11

probably a shit appointment anyway. So, so

22:13

it's asking Marsh to do stuff that isn't really

22:15

suited to him and then giving him no hope to do it. So

22:18

great start. And then it's where a lot of this sort

22:20

of goes

22:21

above him is what we're talking about. And

22:23

it's the seems it more

22:25

and more sharply feels like a sense

22:27

that if they just got rid of Beelsa, then everything

22:30

else will be fine. And that's

22:32

not been the case. It's all you. If there were problems

22:34

with what Beelsa were doing, they needed better

22:37

solutions than just him not being there.

22:39

And then the other aspects of this as well as I think the squad

22:41

and that's something that, you know,

22:43

be able to go over the flat for wanting a small

22:45

squad. I feel like I didn't, I should have

22:47

done the numbers on this, but I didn't, I feel like the squad

22:49

is even smaller

22:51

and certainly in terms of play, like when you

22:53

look at an allodice has gone straight

22:55

to this and said, I haven't got enough players to do

22:57

anything. And you think one

22:59

of the other criticism, I feel like I'm defending

23:01

Beelsa against a lot of this for some reason, but it all kind

23:03

of comes back to how we've moved on from

23:05

it and how we've solved the perceived problems

23:08

of that time.

23:09

Did also not say that he wanted an 18 man squad. Like

23:12

he said, he wanted a small squad. Didn't he? Like it's one of the things I'll

23:14

keep. He did an interview to that effect. Yeah, he did.

23:16

And he, so it made it seem like it was less, um,

23:19

his idea and more a club, more, less Beelsa's

23:21

idea and more a club policy, but it certainly

23:23

something that

23:24

Beelsa agreed with and Guardiola agrees with

23:26

it. He doesn't, they don't like having people hang around,

23:28

not doing much, but

23:29

the players who were hanging around last season, there was some

23:31

criticism.

23:32

Charlie Creswell, Jamie Shackleton, Tyler

23:35

Roberts, Joffrey Gellhardt,

23:37

all young players, all in different

23:39

positions, all available. And then this year is like, no, we'll

23:41

send them out on loan to get experience. And now

23:43

this year, well, we, we need them

23:45

really don't, we, we could really do with a Charlie Creswell

23:48

at this point, or we could do with Joffrey

23:50

being available off the bench because we haven't got striker on the bench

23:52

last season. We had Joe Gellhardt. We

23:54

had Tyler Roberts. Whether they're good enough for the Premier

23:56

League or not is currently relevant because what we

23:58

have now.

23:59

doesn't think he's good enough for the Premier League. It turns around

24:02

because it's 35 million pounds worth of Georgina or

24:04

rutter. And he probably loved to swap in with Tyler

24:06

Roberts because at least Tyler Roberts has played some football matches

24:09

at this level before, but they're all off

24:11

in other places doing other things. And even when we're talking

24:13

about the

24:14

rebuilding with the,

24:16

with the youth, the planning for the future, darko

24:18

JB and Matt, yo Joseph rough playing tournament football

24:20

in internationally, they're

24:21

not available to us either. So

24:24

that then brings us back to the,

24:26

as you move up through the squad, why

24:29

is Diego your end say in Rome,

24:31

why is matches click in Washington

24:33

DC

24:34

when we don't have any midfielders and

24:36

we've got Rasmus Christiansen playing center back

24:39

and Luke hailing at right back is absolutely

24:41

knackered.

24:42

Like it would be like whatever you think about Diego

24:44

your end says qualities as a footballer. And he actually

24:47

did all right with Rome in between

24:49

hamstring injuries.

24:50

So he probably would be injured if he's still here. It

24:53

would be nice to have the option

24:55

of a Spanish international center

24:57

back instead of a right

25:00

back when we need center

25:02

halves to play and still no backup left back. And

25:05

then which is the thing we've been asking for for well,

25:07

ever since we saw junior fair play still not capable

25:09

first choice left back. And

25:11

when we're talking about solving

25:13

fitness overall,

25:15

amford and Rodriguez

25:17

constant injury records makes you think,

25:20

you know, was Russ of the right signing

25:22

was Sony Perkins, the right player.

25:24

Like we need that player in between

25:26

to

25:27

just

25:28

stop assuming that one

25:30

or the other of Bamford will be available

25:32

and have a third option, which

25:34

is something I think I've argued the

25:36

opposite of in the past,

25:37

you know, this is the hypocrisy, hypocrisy of

25:40

hindsight, but

25:42

it's obviously become a glaring gap that there is

25:44

nothing in between

25:45

Bamford and Rodrigo. It says, but as you said

25:47

before, these things haven't been a problem until

25:50

they become a problem. You use that phrase earlier and that's what it is,

25:52

isn't it? Loads of people said, well, I don't think we've

25:54

quite got enough up there. And then we get the program notes saying

25:56

we've got two international number nines and one of the best

25:58

hot English striking.

25:59

prospects. And then actually two of them have been

26:02

injured on and off all season again. And then,

26:04

um, so we're the ones out on load. So when I've said

26:06

before, like, you know, we don't need

26:08

to, it's kind of the warm bodies thing. Do we need

26:11

to sign Shay Adams for example, who's taking

26:13

Southampton? Yes. Anyway,

26:15

well, it wasn't necessarily a yes until

26:17

you're letting Joe Gerlhardt go on load to Sunderland.

26:19

And then it's suddenly like, well,

26:21

that you're putting even more on Rutter

26:23

coming in, but then he would be useful

26:26

for us. Now

26:27

click would be useful for us now. And the only

26:29

reason click isn't here is because we hammered Brendan

26:31

Aronson to the point where he's looked at

26:33

shadow of the player who

26:34

arrived in summer. And then your rent

26:37

say isn't here

26:38

and neither is Charlie Cresswell. One

26:41

of them would be useful now.

26:42

So we had some seen some reasonable center

26:45

back. Needed number nine Moscow. We've got one on loan across.

26:48

Well yeah, even Dan James will be useful

26:50

at this point.

26:51

And then Stuart Dallas being injured all

26:53

year and Adam Forshaw's fitness never

26:56

being recovered. There's

26:57

how Western McKinney exists but

27:00

that wasn't even till January. Who was

27:02

Stuart Dallas's replacement? Was it rocker?

27:05

He was no, it was Calvin's replacement. Yes

27:07

he was. So was it Tyler Adams? Adams is

27:09

Adam Forshaw's replacement, isn't he?

27:12

So there's seems to be no idea

27:14

that, you know, Stuart Dallas, who could play

27:16

left back, could play midfield, playing

27:19

the wing, you know, very important player

27:21

leadership role, high quality, real

27:24

key person. I don't know if anybody

27:26

noticed that he literally snapped his thigh

27:28

and is not going to be able to play, but

27:31

it

27:31

just doesn't seem to have been like a big, oh, we've got Darko

27:34

JB. Like that's probably, that's probably

27:36

the move. When you look through the

27:39

squad planning of like, well, Stuart Dallas will,

27:41

will be fit at some point and then JB will come

27:43

along the pathway at this point and they'll be finding JB

27:46

might be great in the future. But again, where is he now?

27:48

He's off playing tournament football. So he can't even, he

27:51

can't do anything to help us at the moment.

27:54

And it's clear, like

27:55

I would die. So when he was saying at the weekend, it's like, Oh,

27:57

you know, I worked out the problems quite quickly. I'm not going to talk

27:59

about. them now. But then every other question

28:02

that he answered was, I don't have anybody on the bench.

28:04

The squad isn't strong enough. I don't

28:07

have a cent forward. It's obvious

28:09

that he's looking at the way the squad has been built

28:11

and it's just, um,

28:13

disbelieving. And you know, we don't really need

28:15

to keep the some tall as allodices start

28:17

is worrying me because he's sort of like, well, you know, if

28:19

they do want me to keep, keep, uh, hang around

28:21

to sort this out. No, you're right. So

28:25

we don't, we don't need Sam allodice

28:28

specifically to spot this. I'm sure Grazia,

28:31

I think he was just a bit too, but actually no Grazia

28:34

was doing as well. Cause we said when Adam Fosho

28:36

came back for, he was like, well, yeah, we don't have any center

28:38

midfielders. So I'm obviously, I'm glad he's fit again.

28:41

Anybody with any sense has come in and

28:43

gone, well, this squad is completely

28:45

imbalanced. So you just need to buy

28:47

some players in all the places where you don't have any players.

28:51

So it's not going to be, you know, there's a lot of

28:53

worry going into the similar. We don't have a director of

28:55

football. We don't have a manager. We need to buy those players. It's

28:57

pretty simple. It takes us back to what Michael said,

28:59

sign all the left backs and sign all the central midfielders.

29:02

Anyway, it was being exasperated. So we're a West

29:04

Ham confused by all as well.

29:06

You know, I think those players, like you said, they're

29:09

a team that are fighting for their lives. They didn't look like

29:11

it today. You know, if I was there for, I

29:13

think that's a different, I was a bit surprised cause I've watched

29:15

them the last couple of games. So they got a, they lost two,

29:17

one at city. They, they put in a good fight. And then last

29:19

week at home to Newcastle, they probably got

29:22

stuck in and I thought I was, I was a bit worried

29:24

coming his day because there's no pressure

29:26

on us. Now we're safe with the way results

29:28

went yesterday. You know, we could have a

29:30

lot of players don't want to get injured. They don't want

29:32

to miss out. All eyes on Prague now that for that, for

29:34

this football club. I know there's one more game left in the

29:36

premier league, but I was a bit

29:39

surprised of our bad leads were. Yeah.

29:41

No, no, I see it. You, you

29:42

know, you sit there saying they were fighting for their lives. They didn't

29:44

look like it all today. They just looked like

29:46

a puppy rolling over and every belly tickle.

29:48

They showed a bit of spirit for the first

29:50

five, 10 minutes. They got their goal and

29:53

the worst thing that happened to them today was going one day. If

29:56

you're scrapping the survive, you put

29:58

better shifts in what I did today.

31:59

He's trying to get the lead boots off

32:02

them and put the light boots back on again. But

32:04

for some reason, when

32:07

we get to, and you could kind of see in the celebrations

32:09

for the first goal,

32:10

Rodrigo running straight to Robbie Keane, and

32:12

it all felt like, well, Robbie Keane has been telling him, you

32:15

know, just take more chances, hit stuff

32:17

on the volley. There's going to be a throw incoming.

32:19

Just whack it in the net. Be confident, believe

32:21

in yourself. And then he has that and

32:24

he runs, but then as soon as we concede,

32:27

it seems like the lead boots come back on. And

32:29

so be also, when he talks about it, he used to say about how

32:32

you couldn't believe that the players put so much effort

32:34

in when they were getting beaten all the

32:36

time. And he used to love the group of players that we had. He

32:38

said they should be running much

32:40

less than they are, but I

32:42

can't fault their effort. They're a great bunch of lads.

32:46

And Jesse Marsh put it in his own

32:48

particular

32:49

weird terms, but he had a bit of a point as well. Whereas like

32:51

he said, I mean, it's such a

32:54

stupid thing to say, but he did have a point of

32:56

like, if we had got relegated last season,

32:59

then he might've done better with

33:01

them in the championship where there's,

33:03

they could have won more games and while they were

33:05

winning games, they could have learned more about how

33:07

we wanted them to play. That's the part where it starts

33:09

to get stupid. Like what is there to learn about fucking banging

33:12

it at the penalty spot? But his idea was

33:14

it's very difficult for him to get his ideas across

33:16

to players who were losing all the time because

33:18

they can't build up that confidence in them. And

33:21

they have no faith in the system because we keep losing.

33:23

I can't believe it. You just

33:25

need to believe more. You know,

33:27

he did have a point though. I will give him the point that if

33:29

we had been in the championship where, you know,

33:32

whatever system you're playing, if

33:34

I'm sure he just liked the fact that it's 46 games,

33:37

you can, you

33:38

can win a few more of them. Even if you win percentages,

33:40

if we go down, I'll get to keep Raffine, right? Which

33:43

was basically the plan last season. But

33:46

yeah, so the psychology of it all as well,

33:48

I think combined with the

33:50

fatigue, two years,

33:53

we're all pissed off with two years of watching

33:55

them lose. Players like

33:58

Ailing, Harrison,

34:00

who I think are good professionals

34:02

also will be pissed off with two years

34:04

of playing,

34:05

losing football because they can't be happy with the

34:08

way that they've performed, particularly when

34:10

injuries come into it. Someone

34:12

like Harrison, who I think puts a lot of, you

34:14

know, he seems like the perfect professional.

34:17

And if injuries are preventing him from

34:20

playing

34:20

as much and contributing

34:22

as much as he believes he can for string,

34:25

same as foreshore can't get through an hour. How much

34:27

that feel you can't play more than an hour of football

34:30

in a situation where it's really necessary and

34:32

Bamford two years of just every

34:34

time he tries to, you know, score

34:36

a goal against Brentford immediately in G hamstring

34:39

celebrating try to come back last season. You plan

34:41

to fast your snaps, try to play now

34:44

your hamstring goes again.

34:46

It must just grind you down. And

34:48

then you have, you know, everybody

34:50

looking young going, Oh, why don't they run as much as they did

34:52

when B.L.C was it like, fuck it out. I've

34:55

had plantar fasciitis recently and it bloody

34:57

hurts. And now Rodriguez, it really hurts.

34:59

And I can't, I'm surprised he was still running around on it because

35:02

I can't go up and down my stairs sometimes with this bloody

35:04

kills. Got the lift button, don't you? Yeah.

35:07

It sounds it's weird because the

35:10

amount of money they get paid reduces

35:12

the amount of sympathy that is available

35:14

for footballers. But you do, when you

35:16

think about the context of playing with

35:18

an injury, I

35:20

don't like getting a paper cut.

35:21

I'm not going to go fucking running

35:24

around with a, give up your paper round

35:26

then give up your paper round and that can all stop. Anyway,

35:28

listen, Alex wants to blame the players.

35:30

Well, as we've all accepted that there's been a lot

35:32

of faults at the top of the season and undoubtedly

35:35

the house, I think that does come a time

35:37

when you need to point a finger at the players

35:39

on 86 minute, when your manager's shouting try

35:42

when you two one down and you

35:44

don't really look like you're trying. I think

35:47

some questions need to be asked. Honestly,

35:51

over entitled,

35:52

not really asked. And

35:55

a big part of the reason that we are going to enjoy next

35:57

season playing fucking nottersfield again. Yeah,

36:00

this morning I drove in past the past Ellen

36:03

road because the way we're coming

36:04

and there's all the pictures of them on the northeast corner and

36:06

I must admit I did go past and go

36:08

loser loser loser loser loser fuck off.

36:11

Any sympathy sympathy does

36:13

he road when you watch that third goal?

36:15

Yeah, just clueless flapping

36:18

about everyone rolling around on the floor. Poor

36:20

Brandon. Do we do

36:22

we manage to work out what happened to him? He just get, I

36:24

think he gets knocked over by Somerville, which

36:26

is,

36:27

um,

36:30

and just, yeah, I guess goes flying. There's a screen.

36:33

I've got a screen grab on my phone of him.

36:35

That's

36:35

the place. The West Ham play is running away and

36:37

he's just,

36:38

his legs are in the air. He's literally upside

36:41

down. That boy needs a year in the championship to toughen

36:43

him up. But the hell is going to get it. Hilarious

36:45

thing about that. Well, not hilarious. And this is where

36:47

you do, you know, have to ask questions about what

36:50

the players are up to.

36:51

And what they're doing was trying to waste time and

36:53

it was easier to score. Yeah. That

36:57

is not a good advert.

36:59

And yeah, should we hold it in the corner? Probably

37:02

no point. Just run around everyone and put it

37:04

in. Even if they went it back,

37:06

we can do really.

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38:16

Let's move on then from Legion United because,

38:18

um, it's too much. It's too, it is too

38:20

much. No, it's, it's spring.

38:22

The sun is shining. We have our health, you

38:24

know, we might stay. You've got a nod. You've got plans.

38:27

How far she has, I've got my health apart from that. Once

38:29

that's, once they are amputated, the ankle,

38:31

that'll be gone. I've had to buy insoles. There were 40 pounds.

38:34

But they're 40 pounds. You've been praising those insoles.

38:36

They didn't have 40 quid. They've worked though.

38:38

If they're actually fixing it. I know how

38:40

to feel about that. Bloody hell though. Yeah, but it's worth it.

38:42

And if you feed for your health, you can't put a price on good

38:44

health. I suppose so.

38:46

If it was your back, which

38:48

you whinge about fucking incessantly, you'd

38:51

buy a 40 pound thing that you stick on your back. Wouldn't you?

38:54

Um, backpack. In fact, I

38:56

buy it for you just to shut you up. All right. You

38:58

can do. You'll appreciate

39:00

this. And it maybe says, uh, something about

39:03

the just disparity in wages. But I

39:05

saw a video of, I think it's arsenals,

39:07

Casey McCabe, giving the pair of boots

39:09

to a young fan and she's about

39:11

to hand them over. Then she's like, Oh, hold on a minute. And then it kind of comes,

39:14

she's come back. She's like, I had to take the insoles out

39:16

and I bet it's cause the 40 quid. Yeah, there'll be some more.

39:18

Oh, there'll be, there'll be custom orthotics at football. There'll

39:20

be a,

39:21

there'll be a pop. There might be a boot sponsorship

39:23

there, but I don't know if there's enough wages in arsenal women

39:26

for, uh, for to be paying out for

39:28

insoles. He can't give the insoles away to every passing

39:30

child. Thogdon want to give him back. What do you see that

39:32

clip this week? No, Thogdon.

39:35

So it bumps into a kid. I presume it was

39:37

outside busy, a Bolton fan, isn't he? What is the

39:39

Thogdon? Thogdon is that, that child blogger.

39:42

Oh, just to put this dad on YouTube. Yeah.

39:44

And he, and he was over in,

39:46

uh, it was over in Qatar. Wasn't he saying what

39:49

a great bunch of ads they all were. I think somebody,

39:51

uh,

39:51

got older. They said, say some nice things about Qatar

39:54

because we're paying for you to beer or whatever the dynamic

39:56

was. I don't know. But anyway, you got a lot of cops,

39:58

a lot of flak for that.

39:59

Anyway, so he was doing, he's one of his more

40:02

recent things. And I think at the end of the

40:04

game and the season or whatever, some kid has got

40:06

the keeper's glove,

40:07

which, you know, nice little souvenir thogged and walks

40:10

up to him afterwards, after the end of the game and basically

40:12

says, can I have that? And this kid's like, you can see it in the kids

40:14

pleading almost like, no, this is mine.

40:16

And he ends up giving it to him. I think he's got a camera in his face

40:19

and plugged and

40:20

takes the glove. And there's been a right backlash

40:22

rate. He just basically like Nick to glove off a kid, whose

40:24

glove, the keeper, the

40:27

ball, the ball, the Escaline.

40:29

Yeah, exactly. Isn't the ball and goalkeeper, his

40:31

brother? I've got a feeling he

40:33

is. I've got a feeling he's on low. His brother plays with

40:36

man city and he's on loan there. I'm sure I've seen this

40:38

in a video. Even

40:40

most of his brothers glove, just

40:42

ask you, I can have one of your gloves, his bedroom, Nick

40:46

something right backlash on it. Yeah.

40:48

Anyway, it's worth, worth looking up to get the actual

40:50

full story.

40:51

I was going to say, let's move on to other clubs. Cause leads to making this miserable.

40:54

And I know man city

40:56

was described as the death star wins another

40:58

title this week, which I liked a great deal. Cause that's basically

41:00

what it is. They

41:01

won the title. Big deal. Whatever. Enjoy

41:04

it. It's worthless. Yeah. Pointless.

41:06

What is it? 115 infractions

41:09

of financial fair play. Well done. Glad to

41:11

be out of the premier league. Never wanted to be here in the first

41:13

place. Did we? Anyway, city extra

41:15

always bring us a smile is what I was going to

41:17

say with that bloody long run up. So this is from

41:19

his live stream that he did after winning the league.

41:21

And he was, which one, which

41:24

one city extra? There's two of them are

41:26

the older one. Okay. Big bro. Big

41:28

bro. He's doing, he's doing, I think he's

41:30

trying to do music. We

41:31

have to say, we need to figure out what to do with propaganda

41:33

next season as well. We should just say, please

41:35

can we keep tabs on this lot? Oh

41:37

yeah, definitely. Because I'll miss him if we don't,

41:40

we'll be in the Northern league. If there's any justice, he's

41:42

about to do a musical thing. And he's, but this is just him

41:44

getting, getting hyped, getting hyped in the way he does.

41:47

Cause Manchester city people are premier league champions,

41:50

man. Once again, unbelievable

41:53

scenes.

41:54

Can you believe it boys? Unbelievable

42:03

let me go for the speech. I'm

42:05

gonna go for a speech boys Get

42:07

it Yes

42:10

people Is

42:17

he gonna rock Well

42:21

get on with it Fire

42:25

in the chat piece by the chat by the

42:27

chat Fire

42:29

in the chat people by the chat let's go They

42:34

find the chat How's

42:36

it was it? Well, no fire in

42:38

the chat. There was fire in the chat. What's he started

42:40

asking for it? Do you know that reminded me of you know

42:42

in the BBC news when they're counting down to the hour Well,

42:45

it's the BBC news Which

42:48

I don't think he realizes I

42:49

Think he just thinks it's a really

42:51

good tune, but it's BBC

42:53

news So sort of deep house

42:56

underground number.

42:57

Yeah, it's found from he went I will

42:59

say this went on for about five minutes

43:02

So good job Hugh Edwards doesn't do that does he?

43:05

You're waiting for the headlines like fire in the chat.

43:07

I want to know what's happened to the economy fire

43:10

in the chat

43:11

Come on. I'm getting ready for it is dead today

43:13

fire in the chats. I mean it's just

43:16

Can I just eat etc?

43:17

Right? So what's this then? This is what he goes

43:19

on to? right

43:27

We've not had it all our own way people Another

43:32

loss at Spurs Alan

43:38

makes us worse All

43:44

errors must come to an

43:46

end Kevin

43:53

De Bruyne is finished

44:00

Jack Grealish,

44:04

he's not good enough for this club. We

44:11

admire us, it's too

44:13

old. I'll

44:17

tell you one thing people, I'll

44:20

tell you one thing, this

44:23

club, this club has spirit.

44:28

Oh, it's going to get dropped there,

44:30

isn't it? It's

44:33

okay, we'll continue.

44:38

I thought it was going to

44:40

get dropped. What

44:46

they do have is access to the unlimited wealth of a

44:48

Middle East gas rich nation. It goes

44:50

on for,

44:51

I just stopped it there because he was expecting

44:54

a drop and it's quite funny that it goes wrong, but

44:56

it goes on for like another five minutes of him

44:58

just describing the least jeopardy

45:01

in the season. He was like, there

45:02

was that time when we were, we didn't

45:05

score in the opening 20 minutes against Southampton.

45:08

They on effect. Thankfully we had another seven brilliant

45:10

central midfielders. So it didn't matter too much.

45:15

Did you see that Calvin nearly scores? By the

45:18

way, against Chelsea. Yeah. Not

45:20

watching any of it. I think he hit the post. Yeah.

45:23

Not watched a bit of it. The first thing I was seeing was the players

45:25

and this is just a tribute to the fine Yorkshire upbringing.

45:28

Do you want me to put some sort of a slow

45:30

house beat underneath this that coincides

45:33

with the seconds? The players were

45:36

turning up for

45:37

the postseason party. And

45:39

put the first bit of that first step on just so you can do it. And

45:42

the, some of them are having a mini bus as

45:45

a group. And obviously because

45:47

he was raised by fine Yorkshire

45:50

people, Erling Harland is upfront

45:52

with the bus driver. And you can see through the window

45:54

that the first thing he does is shake hands with the bus

45:56

driver and thank him for bringing them to the

45:58

nightclub.

45:59

he gets out and he's just like, what a,

46:02

Alfie's raised a good. And I know he plays

46:04

for them and he's nothing to do with those, but, um, uh,

46:07

it takes a village, doesn't it? So I like

46:09

to think that the involvement that,

46:11

you know, uncle David Hopkins,

46:14

I don't know if Dave weather all his

46:16

godfather to him or something like that, but

46:18

you know, he's

46:19

been there. He's been raised well. And

46:21

it's just those little details that always seem

46:23

to stand out with how they're not. So I'm running

46:26

around to swearing on every TV interview we could

46:28

find. Cause he doesn't care.

46:29

No, he doesn't have to know. He can

46:32

afford not to. Let's move on to one of our favorites.

46:34

Stevie's back then. Stevie nickel, former Liverpool defender.

46:37

I think he's, he thanks bus drivers.

46:39

No, they're just doing the job. But he doesn't shake

46:41

the hand. It'll be a, it'll be a nod and a

46:43

cheers. Yeah. Which I think is enough. Yeah. He'll

46:45

know. I think, I feel like if, if everyone

46:47

shook the bus driver's hand, it'd slow the services down.

46:50

Cause everyone's getting off. He was

46:52

like a busy city center stop

46:54

where, you know, one of those ones where everyone gets off and you've got

46:56

to, you've got to go down the line to be clear. It was a hired

46:58

mini bus. He wasn't, he didn't get off the

47:01

bus to stop port or something. Double decker. Do

47:03

you, as a rule, do you think the bus driver as you get off? Yeah,

47:05

you've got to think the bus driver horrible. Not

47:07

to you think so. Yeah. Yeah.

47:09

I do as well. You got to, oh, the bus drivers, they

47:11

are pretty grumpy often. Yeah. It's all

47:13

right. Yeah. Part of the deal. Well, it

47:16

helps as well because when

47:17

you are thanking the bus driver,

47:19

you don't necessarily want some like

47:22

big cheerful conversation to resort

47:24

of it. You just want to, yeah. The

47:26

nod wink. That's it. Yeah. That's weird.

47:29

Stop being suggestive to the bus driver

47:31

on your way out. The other one on my

47:33

room. Sexy. I like him. They called

47:35

him love on the way in. He winked on the way out.

47:38

That is one thing, by the way, if you, if you are, if

47:40

you're abroad or far

47:42

outside Yorkshire, that, that bus drivers will

47:44

call your love as a grown man. Yeah. All right.

47:46

Love. That's why Harlan gets on with them.

47:49

Yeah. Cause he knows he's been raised in the north.

47:51

So he,

47:52

he's no fear of bus drivers. Before

47:54

we get on to Steve, let's finish it. And as we've talked about

47:56

people occasionally being a bit of a grumpy, not bad.

47:59

She'll hear from, she'll hear from

47:59

film effort. Yeah, okay. He was he

48:02

was cross about a journalist and it completely

48:04

falls apart from we

48:08

we we one fight we can

48:12

I finish speaking? Are you

48:14

interrupt? Can

48:16

I finish speaking? Okay, cuz I don't interrupt your

48:18

question. Okay, so don't interrupt mine show

48:20

some respect. So

48:24

sorry for the language. The in

48:28

in sorry, what

48:30

was the question? I asked you the question there, please. Frank off. Yeah,

48:35

I forgot the question. So by all means do now interrupt

48:38

me because I've made a complete take to this. Phil

48:40

Neville. I don't even know who's managing anywhere.

48:43

Yeah, well, it's Miami. Yes. So guess you

48:45

know who the president of into my enemy? Will Smith.

48:48

No, no. Come on. Who was

48:50

in place? He was given Phil Neville.

48:52

Don't think Michael knows

48:54

fair enough. Yeah. Yeah. So and also then so

48:56

who was going to I was going to guess the rich fellow from Salford.

48:58

So who is in the team? Paul

49:01

Skoles, John O'Shea. No, you

49:04

need to come closer. Gary Walsh. No,

49:06

closer, closer, closer. I don't

49:08

know his son. Okay.

49:11

I think he must be in the B

49:14

team. Yeah, highly.

49:16

And Beckham's son was there as well. But obviously

49:18

he's been loaned to Brentford

49:20

B this season.

49:23

But yeah, Brentford B call them BB double E. No,

49:26

but they should. They really should. But

49:28

yeah, the Herons as into Miami unknown.

49:31

Um, yeah, Phil

49:33

Neville, one of his other spiky moments

49:36

is trying to, um, insist

49:38

that there's no nepotism involved with,

49:40

um, having brought his son from Manchester

49:43

United youth team to

49:46

Valencia's to, uh, um, was it Valencia where

49:49

Gary was manager? Yeah. Yeah. As

49:51

well. Very badly from there to, uh, into Miami.

49:53

It's just all the queen is like, no, he's not getting any, uh,

49:56

special treatment. And he brought them, he brought

49:58

him on in a.

49:59

a substitute in a, in like a friendly

50:02

against, I think he might've been his Barcelona or somebody like

50:04

that. Like the biggest games that gave him no chance. Yes,

50:06

it was. It was the preseason, wasn't it? Yeah. He was like,

50:08

no, no, that wasn't favorite. In fact, I'm fairly sure that might've

50:10

been when Raffinha scored his first goal for Barcelona. That

50:13

rings a bell. Yeah. Oh, he did. He definitely scored anyway.

50:15

Stevie, come on, give us Stevie. Thank

50:17

you to everyone who's tagged me in this. Cause loads of people

50:19

put him in the direction of this one. Steve, Nicole,

50:21

former Liverpool defender now works for ESPN has become a

50:23

bit of a cult figure on this show because of his

50:25

dour and often strange behavior

50:27

as well. He likes to eat. We know from his

50:30

player profiles in the past,

50:32

bags and bags of crisps, potato chips. And

50:35

we're about to learn here. It loves drinking too. Yeah. Moscow

50:37

discovered this story. First of all, a tale of him

50:39

setting Gary Ebelot's

50:41

wife's hair on fire. I can't remember where

50:43

you discovered this in the first place. They filmed it quite well. Pepsi

50:45

advert or something. No, not that

50:47

way. Anthea Turner was there got blown up by a motorbike.

50:50

That's another famous clip. But so

50:52

this, this is the first time I've heard Stevie

50:54

talking about it in his own words, in his own

50:56

words. So here he is. He's setting the stage. I've seen, oh

51:00

dear. Well, that was a long, this is a long

51:02

day. This is the semi final of

51:04

the FA cup. Liverpool were

51:06

playing crystal palace, um, at

51:09

Villa park. Uh, and I was injured.

51:12

So I was going down on the bus with,

51:14

with all the staff and all the wives and all

51:16

that

51:17

in the morning of the game. And

51:19

so we started drinking on the bus on

51:21

the way there at like 10 o'clock in the morning.

51:25

So obviously they

51:27

played the game. We got beat

51:29

more drink on the way back in the boss

51:31

and Kenny had organised to

51:34

go to a Chinese restaurant, the

51:36

Mandarin and Liverpool,

51:38

we, all the players and all the wives after the

51:40

game could obviously, we thought we were going to win

51:42

and all the rest of it. So by the time

51:45

I got there, I could hardly

51:47

stand up. I was like absolutely

51:49

annihilated. And I actually walked

51:51

out because as you can imagine, I

51:53

have to lose this cup semi final semi final

51:56

FA cup.

51:57

I mean, everybody's, everybody's

51:59

devastated. stated. But because I was

52:01

so drunk, it kind of,

52:04

it kind of loosened up the mood a little bit. So

52:07

this is BBC sounds by the way, you can find it on BBC sounds

52:09

sacked in the morning podcast. So was

52:11

he, was he

52:12

talking about drinking on the bus on the way to the

52:14

game? Yeah. Like not the day before. No.

52:17

So it sounds like he's, this is the day of the game

52:19

and cause he's not playing, he's just thought fucking great.

52:21

I can get, I can get ass on. I

52:24

was thinking we keep talking about, and we've mentioned this

52:26

before, how do we get Brendan Harrison strength

52:28

up? He needs a day like this because

52:30

he's only 22. Isn't he? And he only, he was

52:32

saying like his first taste of beer was the celebrations

52:35

in Salzburg when they're the wunder league

52:37

last year. He's like, Oh, cause you know, he's

52:40

too young legally to drink in America. He

52:42

needs a day like that.

52:43

Just

52:44

getting absolutely smashed on a coach.

52:47

Chewy off Brendan. If you're listening, we

52:49

don't know what we don't know where we'll take

52:51

you somewhere. Just a real heavy

52:54

day of pints in the sunshine

52:57

that will leave him struggling

52:59

with the hangover for days. Obviously they'll join

53:01

up as a boy and leave as a man. Not encouraging

53:03

anybody

53:04

binge drinking. Don't do it unless, um,

53:07

I would, unless you really enjoy it. I would stop at

53:09

a sensible four cans of the square

53:11

balls, uh, beer from North brewing

53:14

as long as you are over 18 and drink responsibly.

53:17

But Brendan, you are over 18 and you, you are

53:21

responsible in every aspect. Just

53:24

yeah. Cut loose. An artist called

53:26

Mr. Bingo. And one of the things he sold on his

53:28

website

53:29

as well as obviously actual artwork he had done was,

53:32

um, get shit faced on a train and you

53:34

bought the right to, he said he would buy you a

53:37

return train ticket to somewhere and

53:39

you were in drinks for the train. And

53:41

that was an experience you could have.

53:43

Yeah, I think it was one of those regular days

53:45

where you could buy a trip in a balloon. Yeah. Get

53:47

shit faced on a train was the thing you

53:49

could do. 20

53:50

people bought it. I've just found it.

53:52

So they go. It's a good trip for him

53:54

anyway. So he's made Steve

53:56

that he thinks he's light in the mood. By being

53:58

here. Absolutely. Because

54:02

we don't love seeing it when a mate who's been on

54:04

the ale all day, when you've not exactly the confidence

54:06

of a very drunk man, I'm doing

54:08

a lovely job. You've lost to what would

54:10

have been, I think second division, Crystal Palace in

54:12

an FA Cup semi final. So

54:14

we picked up the story in the Chinese restaurant. Well,

54:17

said having me having my meal and

54:20

firing away and I'm acting stupid

54:22

as usual and Gary

54:25

Hamlet's wife was sat next to

54:27

me. Now back in the day

54:29

with the big lines man, you know, all the girls

54:31

had the big lines manes here, but

54:34

she had like four gallon

54:36

of lacquer on her. And

54:39

so it was like, it was like

54:41

a big bush on the top of her head.

54:44

And of course, I'm sitting smoking

54:47

and I'm sitting there looking at it. And

54:49

for some reason I'm thinking, I

54:52

want to always happen if I let I

54:57

mean, she's kind of a normal thing.

55:00

It seemed like a good idea at the

55:04

time. I got me later

55:07

and I'm sitting there like that. And I'm like,

55:10

I'll just try and reflect

55:12

it. What did you think was

55:14

going to happen?

55:28

As you do when you have a couple of

55:30

people, do you know what I mean? I'm standing

55:33

banging around the head and then Gary

55:35

Hamlet's like, what are you doing? And he's grabbing his jacket

55:37

and putting his jacket on her head.

55:40

Please

55:44

tell me she's on. Please tell me

55:46

she's okay.

55:49

She's okay now. I think it's going back.

55:52

I might have

55:56

taken a couple of years, but it's quite good. He

55:59

thinks it's all a jolly. J, let me read this

56:01

to you. Pyromania is a type of impulse control

56:03

disorder that is characterized by being unable to

56:05

resist starting fires.

56:07

People with pyromania know that setting fires is

56:09

harmful, but setting fires is the only way

56:11

they can relieve their built up tension, anxiety

56:13

or arousal. JG

56:14

I mean, to set fires to a person

56:16

is... ALICE It's a bit

56:19

out there, isn't it? JG It's psychotic, isn't it? ALICE I think

56:21

so, Michael. JG You know, it's like, you know what you're doing, you're

56:23

drunk. You just think, I'll

56:26

just try and scar someone for life. ALICE

56:31

That's how he made it out as well. You know what it's like

56:33

when you've had a few drinks. Your first impulse is

56:35

to set fire to someone. JG The

56:36

other thing I took from that is there's

56:39

another aspect of Brendan Aronson's improvement,

56:41

smoking. So if we've got

56:43

him... ALICE Beer and tabs. JG No filters. JG If

56:45

we've got him on a... ALICE Take the filters out? ALICE Yeah,

56:48

no. He's not having filters. JG No. If

56:50

we've got him drinking on a train or on a bus,

56:52

obviously, not

56:54

on the train or on the bus, but yeah,

56:56

in the beer garden, wherever it goes to, back

56:58

of 20 in each pub. ALICE

56:59

From my stalking of his girlfriend on Instagram.

57:02

JG That's a very emotive word, Michael. ALICE

57:04

I did discover him looking terrified in a

57:06

cafe the other day. JG Yeah, you seem to

57:08

keep putting him in these... They keep doing these wholesome,

57:11

nice things going to a cafe.

57:14

No, any pub? ALICE

57:15

My other promise to you, Brendan, I

57:17

won't try and take a single picture of you. Because

57:20

it looks like at the moment, if he has any sort of day out, there has to

57:22

be at least a dozen pictures of the same thing

57:24

happening. Which I would just find soul

57:26

destroying.

57:29

JG

57:33

Maybe around closing time, there does need to

57:35

be like one photograph taken of him.

57:38

So the next day he can be shown it

57:40

and go, see how much better you

57:42

look, see how happy you were, see

57:44

how good and strong

57:46

you felt. Like, this

57:48

is you just after you'd fought that policeman, which

57:51

you would never normally have done, would you? So

57:54

you see the benefits.

57:59

be then is it? Yes put this together

58:02

I'm not sure I think he might have been getting shitfaced

58:04

on a train ahead of sending this.

58:37

And Brendan that's how we want to hear you at the end of the night.

58:39

Let's fix up Brendan. Yeah. Well

58:44

there you go. That wraps up propaganda. We've got some propaganda

58:46

extra coming. Got a little quiz.

58:49

Oh nice. Beautiful. Beautiful. Right. I'm

58:51

looking forward to that Michael. What's that about?

58:53

It's called Lassa lest on Midwest.

58:56

It's a geography based quiz about whether

58:59

stuff's nearer to Uruguay

59:00

or Jesse Marshall's hometown.

59:03

No, that sounds good. It does sound good. You're right. I'm

59:06

looking forward to that. Don't you'll

59:08

have to play it properly. Dan, come on. What's in

59:10

my favor? It's pure guesswork. So it'd be perfect for you. Oh

59:13

great. Because I know you know nothing about football. Absolutely

59:15

no football knowledge. Right. Thanks for joining us on

59:17

this one. We'll see you soon. The square

59:19

ball podcast.

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