0:07

You're listening

0:07

to the Stress Nanny podcast and

0:10

I'm your host, Lindsay Miller.

0:10

I'm here to help you keep an eye

0:12

on your family stress levels. In

0:12

our fast paced lives, the

0:16

ability to manage stress has

0:16

never been more important for

0:19

kids or adults. When it comes to

0:19

stress, we have two choices we

0:23

can decrease stress or increase

0:23

our resilience to it. Here on

0:26

the number eight ranked stress

0:26

podcast, I interview experts and

0:30

share insights to help you do

0:30

both. When you tune in each

0:33

week, you'll bring your stress

0:33

levels down and your resilience

0:36

up so that stress doesn't get in

0:36

the way of you living your best

0:38

life. I'm so glad you're here.

0:38

Hey, there this is Lindsay,

0:46

thanks so much for tuning into

0:46

this episode. I'm excited to

0:49

share it with you. I had the

0:49

chance to talk with Lynne

0:52

Bowman, and she's going to talk

0:52

to us about all things food with

0:56

kids. I know sometimes this can

0:56

be such a sticky topic because

1:00

different kids have different

1:00

preferences. There's so many

1:03

messages we get about food and

1:03

she kind of breaks that down for

1:06

us and her goal is to simplify

1:06

it while also creating a lot of

1:11

opportunities for us to connect

1:11

with our kids in meaningful ways

1:15

around food. So I hope you

1:15

enjoy. Welcome to this Stress

1:19

Nanny podcast. I'm your host

1:19

Lindsay Miller and I'm so glad

1:23

you're here for my conversation

1:23

today with Lynn Bowman. Lynne is

1:26

the author of the Amazon

1:26

bestseller Brownies for

1:29

Breakfast and she has been

1:29

featured at women's expos

1:31

throughout the country. Teaming

1:31

up with actress Deirdre Hall to

1:34

write and publish Dierdre Hall's

1:34

Kitchen Close Up and Deirdre

1:38

Hall's "How does she do it?"

1:38

She's won national awards as a

1:41

creative director for Silicon

1:41

Valley companies, was creative

1:44

director at E and J. Gallo

1:44

Winery, advertising manager at

1:48

Red King laboratories and

1:48

freelanced for agencies in San

1:51

Jose, Los Angeles and New York.

1:51

She's also worked as an actor,

1:55

actress, makeup artist,

1:55

screenwriter, Illustrator, legal

1:58

journalist and television

1:58

weather person. Lynne has three

2:02

grown children, two absolutely

2:02

perfect grandchildren, and is

2:05

president of the Pescadero

2:05

Community Foundation. She and

2:08

her husband have a small farm on

2:08

the coast of Northern

2:11

California. Lynne, thank you so

2:11

much for joining me today.

2:15

Lindsay, this is

2:15

just great, great fun for me, I

2:18

love what you're doing. And I

2:18

relish the opportunity to talk

2:21

to your listeners. So let's do

2:21

this.

2:25

Yeah, I'm

2:25

excited to there are so many

2:27

topics we've kind of already

2:27

talked about diving into. But I

2:30

want to start out with the

2:30

stress that we kind of face

2:33

around feeding our families, I

2:33

mean, feeding ourselves and

2:36

feeding our families. It's a big

2:36

job. And I think sometimes we

2:40

don't maybe recognize all of the

2:40

pieces to it. And like why it's

2:43

such a complicated task.

2:46

It really isn't as

2:46

complicated, I think is we've

2:49

made it Lindsay but you know, I

2:49

think a lot of us are on such

2:54

cognitive overload now, because

2:54

we, okay, we have the gift of

3:00

this amazing information that we

3:00

can get every day is just

3:04

roaring across the transom to

3:04

our debt. We've just got

3:07

hundreds of emails and all this

3:07

information about food and

3:13

health. And you know, dieting

3:13

and weight loss and this and

3:16

that thing, and then kids until

3:16

it just makes you nuts, trying

3:21

to sort out what matters and

3:21

what doesn't matter. You know,

3:25

what do I need to feed my kids?

3:25

What don't I need to feed my

3:29

kids. And, and so I love talking

3:29

about this, because I do believe

3:35

it can be simple for me. I mean,

3:35

hugely simplify. And without

3:41

losing any of the quality of

3:41

what you're doing as a parent.

3:45

And which is why I wrote this

3:45

book Brownies for Breakfast.

3:48

Because it's not, it shouldn't

3:48

be complicated. You know, I

3:54

don't count calories, I don't

3:54

measure anything. I'm a messy

3:58

cook in the kitchen. I mess up

3:58

right, and then I fix it. Like

4:04

all of us. I don't spend even

4:04

though my kids are now grown and

4:09

I'm in the grandparents stage. I

4:09

don't spend all day in the

4:12

kitchen, I don't want to

4:12

sometimes I will sometimes I'll

4:16

really cook. But the rest of the

4:16

time, what we all want to do is

4:21

pull something out of the

4:21

freezer, heat it up, throw

4:23

something in it, and serve it

4:23

and have it be really, really

4:27

good. And know that it's good

4:27

food for ourselves and for our

4:33

family. So I've definitely got

4:33

some tips and tricks about how

4:38

to do that. And you read my bio,

4:38

which is kind of crazy because

4:43

back in the day, you know, we we

4:43

didn't have a plan. We women

4:49

especially we just came out of

4:49

school or you know, quit or

4:52

whatever, and just started doing

4:52

stuff and getting jobs. So

4:58

that's the way I approach life

4:58

and is just, okay, yeah, let's

5:02

do this, whatever it is. And so

5:02

I do not have a degree in

5:07

nutrition. And I don't have an

5:07

MD. And I don't have a reality

5:13

TV show or any other sort of

5:13

what credential for doing this.

5:20

But I'm a grandma. And I think a

5:20

thing that is difficult for all

5:26

of us families now is that so

5:26

many of us are separated from

5:32

family, and separated even from

5:32

friends who would support us,

5:38

throughout history, ancient

5:38

history, women have always had a

5:45

community of other women to

5:45

support them. And kids play in

5:52

the mud in the middle of the

5:52

village or the town square, with

5:55

dogs and cats, and, you know,

5:55

chickens, and the moms were busy

6:00

doing stuff, but they were

6:00

together. And so they were

6:05

watching kids together, they

6:05

were cooking together, and

6:08

learning from each other. And

6:08

then there were the old ladies

6:11

like myself, The babushkas, you

6:11

know, who, who had been there

6:17

and done it and fought the

6:17

battles. And who could say to

6:19

the younger women, you pick that

6:19

herb, and you give it to the

6:23

kid, you know, and so, and we,

6:23

what we have now, are

6:27

professionals, advisors, you're

6:27

a professional, I don't mean to

6:32

make light of that. But I get

6:32

the sense that before you're

6:35

professional, you're a mom, and

6:35

you're an interested woman who

6:40

wants to help other women. And

6:40

I, I feel like that's a bit of a

6:46

missing link today that that we

6:46

need to, whenever possible, kind

6:51

of get back to relying on

6:51

friendship and community and

6:55

communion. But that relates to

6:55

food too Lindsay is we've

7:00

separated food from community.

7:00

So every mom and are dad, but

7:08

I'm talking to moms today, is

7:08

left to sort it out herself, and

7:13

figure out dinner herself and

7:13

figure out shopping herself. And

7:19

she's also I betcha working a

7:19

job of some kind, or two, or

7:23

three. And she is driving for

7:23

hours, sometimes every day. And

7:32

she is this is the part that

7:32

gets really iffy for me, taking

7:36

kids to choir, to sports, to

7:36

language lessons, all this

7:41

stuff. So, my advice my granny

7:41

advice to you wonderful ladies,

7:47

number one, and this relates to

7:47

food, I'll get around to it. But

7:50

number one, what can you throw

7:50

out of the wagon? Because you're

7:54

gonna need to throw something

7:54

out of the wagon? You're doing

7:57

too much. You know that? Right?

7:57

Well, yes, I want I want to back

8:04

you up on the that, you are

8:04

doing too much. So you know,

8:10

make a choice or two. And

8:10

sometimes those choices are

8:12

going to be hard. What I said to

8:12

I had three kids, single mom and

8:17

I was their sole source of

8:17

support. And I had a homicidal

8:20

ex who made our life a living

8:20

hell. But one of the things that

8:25

I did that I look back and go

8:25

that was that was a smart thing

8:29

to do. Sat the kids down one

8:29

night said, Look, how much do

8:33

you really love soccer. And they

8:33

kind of looked at each other and

8:37

looked at me and went, well, we

8:37

don't really love soccer. I

8:41

said, Okay, let's not do that

8:41

anymore. Because it was three

8:44

uniforms, three snack mom

8:44

responsibilities, three

8:48

different sets of games that had

8:48

to be played in different places

8:53

in different brands. So I said,

8:53

each of you can choose two

8:56

activities, one kind of brainy

8:56

activity, and one kind of body

9:01

activity choose and I'll support

9:01

you. So they all went okay. All

9:07

right. And they went off. And

9:07

then I don't know a week or two

9:10

later, my son who at the time

9:10

was maybe I want to say 13 or 14

9:18

came back and said, Okay, I've

9:18

got it. I know what I want to

9:20

do. What? Fencing What? What?

9:20

Yeah, I want to fence. Okay. Do

9:32

some research, find out where

9:32

and get back to me. Oh, I

9:35

already did. Okay. So it turns

9:35

out there was a salt. A school,

9:42

okay. A couple miles from us in

9:42

downtown San Jose, which is

9:46

where we lived at the time. And

9:46

so we went over there to look

9:50

and all three kids ended up

9:50

going yeah, this is for us. We

9:55

signed up. They loved it. It was

9:55

a great it was it was on this

9:59

same place at the same time. And

9:59

my youngest ended up as 15th in

10:05

the country. I mean, she just

10:05

really took to it. And fencing

10:09

is an interesting sport that

10:09

really is very equitable for men

10:12

and women. So all three kids,

10:12

and I tell that story, to let

10:19

you all know that you don't have

10:19

to do it, like everybody else.

10:26

Really don't. And so that

10:26

relieves us of all kinds of

10:30

stress right there. And plus, I

10:30

got to sit indoors, not in the

10:37

rain. It's comfy, which I love.

10:37

No more muddy Saturday mornings

10:47

at six, you know?

10:50

Windy, rainy, we've done a few tournaments this winter, and it's been cold.

10:51

So I hear you indoors,

10:56

taking those

10:56

uniforms back, and you're funny.

11:01

So, that worked for us, and then

11:01

the kids, one daughter took

11:06

piano and, you know, and another

11:06

one took cello for a while, but,

11:10

but getting us off the soccer

11:10

field was major. And I just,

11:17

we're asking too much of

11:17

ourselves, no question about it

11:23

with too little return? And, you

11:23

know, it's the question, we're

11:28

all asking about our kids is

11:28

well, what are they? What are

11:30

they learning? You know, what's,

11:30

what does this team thing mean

11:33

for them? And how important is

11:33

it and all the questions about

11:36

coaches and coaching and parents

11:36

on the field and so on.

11:40

Sometimes you can just opt out.

11:40

And it's okay. It's really okay.

11:47

Because when you're 18, or 20,

11:47

or 23, or 25, or 40, what still

11:54

matters? Did it matter that you

11:54

played lousy soccer on a lousy

12:00

team on a lousy Saturday

12:00

morning, making your mother

12:03

crazy? What I felt my kids

12:03

learned fencing. Actually, they

12:13

retain I think some of those

12:13

values it was it was

12:15

fascinating. And, folks, it

12:15

turned out to be a thing that

12:21

could get you a scholarship into

12:21

a good school, a good college,

12:24

because there weren't a lot of

12:24

kids doing that. So I would just

12:30

ask you to really take a good

12:30

close look at what you're

12:33

whether it's cheer or whatever,

12:33

if you if you love it, and your

12:38

kid loves it. And that's the

12:38

most important thing, good.

12:44

Otherwise, out of the wagon, you

12:44

know, you don't have to do it.

12:49

Because all that takes away from

12:49

what you're doing in your

12:54

kitchen. And what you're doing

12:54

in your kitchen is not just

12:58

eating another thing that I want

12:58

to share with you, because of

13:03

being the age that I am, I just

13:03

turned 77 Yay. Is that my kids

13:10

are now saying to me, they're

13:10

all in their late 40s. And

13:14

they're saying things to me,

13:14

like, you know, Ma, what really

13:17

mattered. What I'm so grateful

13:17

for that you did, blah, blah,

13:22

blah, it may surprise you. And

13:22

it surprised me that what my

13:28

kids have said is they feel like

13:28

dinner for us at our table was

13:33

like a grad course in marketing.

13:33

Because my friends were there

13:38

often at the table because that

13:38

had to be my social life. I

13:41

couldn't go out and eat, you

13:41

know, I had to invite people in

13:45

which I don't regret at all that

13:45

was fine. And my kids learn how

13:49

to have that kind of social

13:49

life. They learned how to eat at

13:53

a table with grownups, how to

13:53

have a conversation, about how

13:58

to use utensils. We have raised

13:58

two generations of kids eating

14:03

out of a box or a bag with no

14:03

utensils. So think about that.

14:12

And is that what you want? You

14:12

know, is that okay? It wasn't

14:16

for me. And plus I couldn't

14:16

afford it. I was always broke.

14:21

So cooking fast and cheap. But

14:21

healthy was what we did. And but

14:32

but don't forget the social

14:32

aspect of it because sitting at

14:37

that table with you, with other

14:37

family members with friends,

14:43

ends up being maybe the most

14:43

important education your kids

14:46

get. And when they when it comes

14:46

time for them to interview with

14:52

schools to go and look at

14:52

colleges and to start out their

14:55

life apart from you. Are you

14:55

sending them a way with the

15:01

kitchen skills and dining

15:01

skills, and housekeeping skills

15:07

that matter more, I will argue,

15:07

than the academic skills.

15:12

So this is

15:12

interesting. Well, and it brings

15:19

up I mean, my, my honestly, my

15:19

knee jerk reaction is but wait,

15:23

because I think there's so much

15:23

value in. Like the, the

15:30

realization that like,

15:30

especially for women, I think

15:33

that's what's hitting me is like

15:33

for like to share the load and I

15:37

hear you saying you were a

15:37

single mom doing it. So it had

15:39

to be just you, like, in my

15:39

reality what what that looks

15:43

like more and more is like, I'm

15:43

not the only one responsible for

15:47

those things, right? Like, it's

15:47

the conversations on sharing,

15:50

like, yes, family dinner, I feel

15:50

like it's so important in our

15:53

house. And I value the

15:53

opportunity to sit down and

15:57

connect and eat and, you know,

15:57

teach manners and those kinds of

16:00

things. And also, I found so

16:00

much, like, I don't know if

16:06

liberation is the word, but just

16:06

like being able to team up with

16:09

those tasks, instead of feeling

16:09

like the weight of it felt, you

16:13

know, like, it's only my job to

16:13

make sure these things happen,

16:17

being able to be like, Hey,

16:17

we're, we're like married

16:20

partner team here, you're gonna

16:20

do this piece of it, I'm going

16:24

to do this piece of it. And

16:24

we're going to share the load,

16:26

so that there's space for me to

16:26

be doing other things that I

16:29

want to do or that aren't, you

16:29

know, like we can, we can create

16:32

like a dynamic that has a little

16:32

bit more fluidity than just like

16:37

me feeling shouldered with, you

16:37

know, all of the

16:40

responsibilities.

16:41

Absolutely. And

16:41

that's a whole other what I want

16:47

to focus on particularly is all

16:47

the parents who are being

16:52

servants and not teachers.

16:52

Because, yes, if you have a

16:57

spouse, yeah, deal with it, and

16:57

partner up. But it's equally

17:03

important, maybe more so that

17:03

your kids understand that they

17:07

are part of the team, then you

17:07

have responsibilities in the

17:11

kitchen, that you don't get up

17:11

after a meal and leave never,

17:16

that you don't arrive at a meal

17:16

and just go where is it ever.

17:21

And I see that happening so

17:21

much. Because the the excuses,

17:26

the kids are so busy, they got

17:26

homework, and they have this and

17:29

they have, I'm sorry, I don't

17:29

think anybody should be too busy

17:36

to help out and your most basic

17:36

thing, which is feeding each

17:41

other, eating together. That's,

17:41

I mean, it doesn't get any more

17:46

basic than that does it? And you

17:46

know, from the time your kid is

17:51

on their feet, I want to see

17:51

kids carrying stuff to the

17:56

dishwasher, and knowing how to

17:56

put them in the dishwasher, or

18:00

in the sink and dropped dish,

18:00

what's going to happen all that

18:04

it's okay. But you have to learn

18:04

these things. And the sooner you

18:10

learn them, the sooner they

18:10

become habits with kids, the

18:14

happier your family is, I mean,

18:14

literally, that's what makes a

18:19

happy family. When parents

18:19

aren't sharing sharing the load,

18:23

or when kids aren't sharing a

18:23

load, somebody's doing too much.

18:27

And I'll bet it's you.

18:30

That is probably

18:30

true. Yeah, well, and I

18:33

appreciate the way you brought

18:33

it up in terms of a conversation

18:35

because I think sometimes that

18:35

that like underlying burden of

18:40

stress that can come by doing

18:40

all the things and managing all

18:43

the things and feeling responsible for all the things is one that doesn't necessarily

18:44

get articulated. I know in our

18:48

house, it'll get to like a

18:48

breaking point where I'll be

18:50

like, okay, something's gotta

18:50

give. And then I have the

18:53

conversation instead of you

18:53

know, there have been seasons

18:55

where we've been regularly like

18:55

talking about the workload and

18:58

who's doing what, and how are we

18:58

teaming up. But I find when

19:01

we're not having those regular

19:01

communications, it'll like, all

19:05

kind of overflow and then be

19:05

like, you know, the moment where

19:08

you sit your kids down on the

19:08

couch, you're like, Okay, this

19:10

isn't working. Like what can we

19:10

toss what what can go out of the

19:14

wagon, and like you said, so I

19:14

think that that direct

19:17

communication can be so helpful.

19:17

Because if we do it before we

19:21

get super overwhelmed and

19:21

emotional about it, it can be

19:25

just a really logical, right,

19:25

like basic conversation like,

19:29

Hey, this is what's going on.

19:29

Here are the resources we have

19:31

in terms of time, money and

19:31

energy. Here are the obligations

19:34

that we're currently sitting

19:34

with. They're not a good fit

19:36

right now. How can we

19:36

recalibrate so that we can

19:39

create a scenario that works for

19:39

us?

19:42

And that sentence

19:42

or two right there epitomizes is

19:48

the way I thought about bringing

19:48

my children up, I was in

19:52

business and that and my dad was

19:52

a businessman and that was his

19:56

conversation at the table. So my

19:56

language my love language,

19:59

right? was was just what you're

19:59

talking about. It's like, okay,

20:03

what are our resources? How do

20:03

we use them wisely? How are we

20:07

using our time. And think of

20:07

that, as the best education your

20:13

kids will get, both for how to

20:13

manage their lives, and how to

20:18

function in the real world.

20:18

Because that's how we do

20:21

business folks. That's how we

20:21

build society. That's how we

20:26

build a home, you those skills,

20:26

those negotiation, and planning

20:31

skills are huge. And we can keep

20:31

bringing it back to food. You

20:38

know, it's, it's very natural

20:38

was always quite natural to me

20:41

to plan. Because I had to, I

20:41

mean, I wasn't going to survive

20:45

if I didn't. But when it comes

20:45

to food, of course, you have to

20:49

plan, if you are running out

20:49

every night or two and grabbing

20:54

ingredients for something or

20:54

trying to think of what you

20:56

would have, you'd be wasting an

20:56

enormous amount of time and

21:01

energy, and making you all

21:01

crazy, you will make yourself

21:05

crazy and your kids crazy. So

21:05

unfortunately, what a lot of us

21:09

wind up doing is just giving up

21:09

the whole idea of cooking at

21:13

home and you know, having a

21:13

kitchen table conversation. And

21:18

it's takeout is drive through

21:18

all the time. So I want you and

21:23

your kids cooking, so essential

21:23

that your kids learn how to feel

21:29

competent in the kitchen, that's

21:29

absolutely essential. And it's

21:33

essential that you let them fail

21:33

in the kitchen. Because so many

21:40

things are taught that way. It's

21:40

okay to fail. Huge. Parents

21:45

today, if I had to do a sort of

21:45

blanket criticism of what I see

21:50

going on, it's that parents feel

21:50

that they can't allow their kids

21:55

to fail to flop, either in

21:55

school or in sports or in life.

22:02

And that's how we learn. That's

22:02

how you get tough. That's how

22:06

you get smart is falling on your

22:06

butt. And I'm an expert. Right?

22:18

And, and I'm proud of those

22:18

kinds of, spectacular in some

22:23

cases, failures. But that makes

22:23

you that gives you confidence,

22:28

right? Once you've gotten up

22:28

once or twice and dusted

22:32

yourself off. When your kids see

22:32

you fail and come back from it

22:37

like okay, that was interesting.

22:37

They learn so much. And and so

22:42

all of this you can relate to

22:42

cooking and food and your

22:48

kitchen culture. But from a

22:48

practical point of view, in my

22:53

book, I have some some

22:53

strategies, some recipes. One is

22:58

called genius soup. And I'm

22:58

bringing that up because if

23:01

you're not doing this, I want

23:01

you to do this. It's the soup

23:05

that you make once a week or

23:05

once every couple of weeks. And

23:09

you use up all the kind of sad

23:09

looking greens and stuff that

23:13

you bought very well intention.

23:13

They're in the bottom of the

23:16

crisper and they're gone. Oh

23:16

yeah, pale but I think I'm done.

23:20

So this is a really basic so

23:20

that so many grandmas all over

23:25

the world makes some version of

23:25

it. And what I have in the book

23:29

is you make, you you saute

23:29

onion, and celery and in the

23:38

bottom of and carrots in the

23:38

bottom of a big pot and you

23:43

know, nothing fancy little olive

23:43

oil. And then you dump in a

23:48

bunch of stock if you have it.

23:48

Water, if you don't have stock

23:53

as it will make sort of its own

23:53

stock. And then you clean out

23:56

the fridge and you put in

23:56

spinach and kale and cabbage and

24:02

collard greens, anything that

24:02

that you would call leafy,

24:08

anything, put it in there and

24:08

cook it all afternoon, or put it

24:13

in your Insta pot or put it in

24:13

your crock pot. And it doesn't

24:17

matter. You can't mess it up,

24:17

trust me. And so you're making

24:22

this big pot and tomatoes by the

24:22

way, fresh or boxed tomatoes and

24:28

and then you'll season it up and

24:28

I tell you how. But then the

24:32

next night, you can make a Greek

24:32

soup, and the next night you

24:36

make a pasta and the next night

24:36

you make tortilla soup, a

24:39

Mexican kind of thing. And that

24:39

soup, which is super nutritious,

24:44

takes you through the week, just

24:44

fine. And then you freeze a

24:49

bunch of it and then the next

24:49

week you can pull it out of the

24:51

freezer and make other stuff. So

24:51

it's strategies like that that

24:56

many of you are already using.

24:56

But if you stopped, if you've

25:01

given up as many of us do, and

25:01

just sheer fatigue, go back, try

25:06

it. It's such a great strategy

25:06

to keep your food homemade. And

25:12

nothing is better than a good

25:12

hot soup, by the way, which

25:17

Americans don't eat enough of.

25:17

And soup is cheap. It's super

25:22

nutritious. People love it. But

25:22

American kids are not brought up

25:26

on soup. They're brought up on

25:26

chicken bits up

25:33

You feel strongly about the fast food, I can tell

25:39

And I do have a

25:39

real issue, I'd say with big

25:43

food. Because the more you know

25:43

about it, the more you're

25:47

horrified that anyone could be

25:47

part of that and sleep at night.

25:52

No, I'm serious.

25:55

So I have

25:55

watched the one where they let

25:57

the hamburger sit on the you

25:57

know, counter or whatever, for

26:00

however many days before it

26:00

didn't go bad. I mean, I hear

26:03

you. I also I think my we tend

26:03

toward like salad takeout at my

26:08

house. So we'll go to like the

26:08

there's like a little soup and

26:12

salad place down the street.

26:12

That's our favorite. So when

26:14

you're saying fast food is evil,

26:14

and I'm thinking of like the

26:17

salad that we brought home. And

26:17

like, I mean, I wouldn't call it

26:19

evil. It was convenient, maybe

26:19

more expensive than if I'd made

26:22

it at my house. But I mean, you

26:22

know, I think there's a range of

26:26

choices when it comes to fast

26:26

food that you know, the

26:29

convenience sometimes is

26:29

something that I opt for. So

26:31

that's all.

26:33

You have better

26:33

choices than I did believe me.

26:36

There's a lot of it going on out

26:36

there. I have have two young

26:40

friends who started making

26:40

donuts, from the recipes that I

26:44

put out that are the donuts are

26:44

sugar free, gluten free, high

26:49

protein, because they're made

26:49

with nut butter and really great

26:52

ingredients, you bacon, you

26:52

don't fry them, the recipe is in

26:54

the book. These two ladies in

26:54

two different parts of

26:57

California have made very

26:57

lucrative businesses out of

27:03

making these doughnuts for

27:03

people so that guilt free, you

27:08

take them home, you could treat

27:08

your family, your kids with

27:12

these things made out of good,

27:12

fresh ingredients locally

27:15

artisanal, baked goods, yeah,

27:15

that's different. What I'm

27:20

talking about is the

27:20

craveability industry, that

27:24

designs food that you can't stop

27:24

eating, and it's all salt, and

27:30

bad fats and processed sugar.

27:30

And, you know, yeah,

27:35

Yeah, no, and I

27:35

hear you and I love Well, I love

27:38

what you're saying too, about

27:38

just the like the level of

27:41

intention that you bring to the

27:41

kitchen, you know, in, in all

27:46

the ways that you can bring

27:46

intention to the kitchen,

27:48

whether you know, it's in the

27:48

planning, it's in the, like,

27:51

utilizing ingredients that you

27:51

have in order to make something,

27:54

it's in the teaching, it's in

27:54

the communication, the

27:56

discussion, I mean, so in terms

27:56

of like the richness of

28:00

experience that you can get in

28:00

the kitchen. I mean, I hear you

28:05

that, like there's nothing else

28:05

that kind of can, can match that

28:09

or provide quite as many

28:09

opportunities to engage with the

28:12

kinds of conversations and the

28:12

kind of learning that, you know,

28:15

that goes on when we feed

28:15

ourselves intentionally.

28:18

When you read

28:18

anything, you know, any novels

28:24

or history, what is it that

28:24

people are nostalgic about? What

28:29

is it from their childhoods that

28:29

they remember? With love and

28:35

passion? And, you know, is it?

28:35

What is it? Is it watching TV?

28:40

Well, I guess sometimes it is,

28:40

but in my experience what most

28:43

people wax poetic about is

28:43

sitting in the kitchen with

28:46

their grandma, or their or their

28:46

dad and smelling the smells that

28:53

you can only smell in your

28:53

kitchen. I certainly have those

28:59

memories of my Aunt Frosty

28:59

particularly making stuff for

29:04

me. And another thing that I

29:04

want to talk about a little bit

29:09

and it seems you know, you think

29:09

well, we've all got to much to

29:12

do so don't give me anything

29:12

else to do. But kids will eat

29:16

what kids grow. And kids will

29:16

eat what kids cook. If you're

29:24

not growing anything with your

29:24

kids, I would really encourage

29:28

you to try and sometimes it's

29:28

just a bucket. You know, it's

29:33

sometimes just pots on your sink

29:33

of parsley and basil and

29:37

something that smells good and

29:37

you can just snip up and put

29:39

your food. Kids are so proud

29:39

when they have grown something

29:44

and what you learn by planting a

29:44

seed and watching it grow or die

29:53

Let's be honest.

29:54

Let's be honest.

29:54

You know that, that's the most

30:01

important thing we teach our

30:01

kids is how to make life. Right?

30:06

Yeah. Yeah, no.

30:06

And I think well, and I think

30:09

the, again, the simplicity,

30:09

like, you know, they're the

30:12

upside down tomato pots where

30:12

you just you like hang it off a

30:15

little hook on your back porch

30:15

and it's, you know, growing the

30:18

tomato upside down, or it's,

30:18

there's so many different ways,

30:22

you know, it's the strawberry

30:22

pot, where it's just got those

30:24

little tiny outlets where you

30:24

put the individual plants in

30:27

there, and it's just one pot,

30:27

but you can get the strawberries

30:30

off of it just to get started or

30:30

just engaged with the process of

30:34

growing, there's Yes, so much

30:34

value value there.

30:38

And we gave them

30:38

names. The plant and, and I'm

30:45

still doing it, I mean, here I

30:45

am with pear trees that have

30:49

names and and I had to talk my

30:49

husband into helping me get the

30:54

fiddly fig out of the living

30:54

room yesterday and drain her out

30:57

because she was drowning, she

30:57

had too much water. And Mrs.

31:00

Figgy is her name. And she's

31:00

beautiful. But the relationship

31:05

that you teach your children to

31:05

have with all living things,

31:11

pets, animals, people, friends,

31:11

and plants and birds, I will

31:17

argue that that may be the very

31:17

best education they get from

31:22

you. It, you know that we we

31:22

pile so much on the education

31:30

system. And they're doing the

31:30

best they can but you know, kids

31:37

really do most of their learning

31:37

at home. Like it or not. And

31:42

they're in and that's negative

31:42

and positive. Right. And another

31:47

thing that that I have said over

31:47

and over again to parents. And I

31:52

think we need to remind

31:52

ourselves continually is it's

31:55

not what you say, it's what you

31:55

do. You your parenting is being

32:02

done by example. So look at

32:02

yourself, continually. Am I

32:10

being am I doing what I want my

32:10

children to learn? So am I

32:17

driving myself crazy? Giving

32:17

away too much not having

32:22

boundaries? Is that how I'm

32:22

conducting my grownup life?

32:26

Because that's what I'm teaching

32:26

my kids. That is exactly what

32:31

they're learning. So, I would

32:31

argue that if you are laughing,

32:37

and dancing, and singing, and

32:37

cooking, and having friends then

32:43

that's what you're teaching your

32:43

kids. And I want you to be

32:49

conscious of what you're

32:49

teaching your kids. You know,

32:55

it's not what's in that book. I

32:55

mean, books I love. We all love

32:57

it. It's what they see you being

32:57

Yeah.

33:09

Yeah. And that

33:09

reflection is sometimes

33:11

humbling, sometimes inspiring

33:11

when you see like little parts

33:14

of you that are amazing walking

33:14

around, and you're like, oh, my

33:17

gosh, something about this is

33:17

working. And then other times

33:20

you're like, oh, no, that was

33:20

from Me, too.

33:24

And well, as I sit

33:24

back, and it's so interesting to

33:29

have kids who are middle aged,

33:29

who are now saying, you know, my

33:33

when you did this, and when you

33:33

did that, and I go really the

33:37

things they remember, it's so

33:37

interesting, the things that

33:40

really impressed them. Because I

33:40

was just trying to survive. I

33:45

mean, you know, yeah, I mean,

33:45

and it was the 80s Lindsay So, I

33:52

would get up and I was in this

33:52

peculiar professional situation,

33:57

I was usually the only woman in

33:57

the room. And, and it was the

34:01

80s. And so I would get up at

34:01

five in the morning and put on a

34:05

full set of lashes, and the

34:05

whole you know, and, and the

34:09

outfit with the shoulder pads,

34:09

and the hat and the whole thing,

34:13

and then I would get the kids up

34:13

and do the whole breakfast and

34:18

everything and everybody and so

34:18

and then I would drop them at

34:22

daycare. And then I would slide

34:22

into the office but I had to be

34:26

there early. There was no way

34:26

that I was going to be late

34:30

because I was already I had so

34:30

many points against me because

34:32

I'd female parent right? So I

34:32

had to be one of the first ones

34:37

there. And I had to look all

34:37

perky as get out and never have

34:41

a bad attitude. And the men

34:41

would come in going, Oh man, I

34:46

had a rough morning, you know?

34:46

And I'd be thinking Mm hmm.

34:53

Yeah. Who picked out your

34:53

outfit? What is? Anyway, when

35:00

when your kids then reflect back

35:00

on the things that they thought

35:04

were hilarious or heroic or

35:04

stupid, or whatever that you did

35:08

as a parent, that's really

35:08

interesting aren't always what

35:13

you think. And so, as I said, my

35:13

two in my house, the surprise

35:18

for me was when my kids all came

35:18

back and said, You taught us how

35:22

to do business. You taught us

35:22

how to answer the phone. My

35:25

office, I started my own company

35:25

and 87. And so my office was in

35:29

the living room. And there'd be

35:29

an I wanted the kid, I wanted to

35:35

be there, when the kids were

35:35

home from school, when they were

35:38

teens, even more important than

35:38

when they were little. And so

35:42

there'd be fighting and barking

35:42

and just all kinds of chaos

35:46

going on. And the phone would

35:46

ring and go silent. And one of

35:51

them would grab the phone and

35:51

go, Bowman Creative Services.

35:56

Right. And at the time, that was

35:56

just, that was survival. And so

36:02

so I taught them whatever skills

36:02

I could, because I couldn't

36:05

afford to hire people. You know,

36:05

that was my life. But that also,

36:10

they, they learned as teens, how

36:10

to conduct a business, how to do

36:16

a resume, you know, all these

36:16

things that you kind of take for

36:21

granted as an adult. But those

36:21

kids have to learn those skills

36:25

somewhere, somehow. And school

36:25

is not always the place. And

36:32

then there's also the confidence

36:32

that comes with kids who have

36:36

learned those kinds of skills at

36:36

home, and seeing their parents

36:41

have those kinds of skills, and

36:41

seeing that those skills, get

36:45

you somewhere or accomplish

36:45

something. So they they really

36:51

take it in, like, I want to do

36:51

that. I want to be that. And you

36:58

know, my kids have different

36:58

very different lives than than I

37:02

did professionally. But still,

37:02

those basic tools are, I think,

37:09

super important. And let's bring

37:09

it back to the kitchen. If you

37:13

are a neurosurgeon, and none of

37:13

your team want to eat with you

37:18

because you don't know how to

37:18

eat properly. Or you're not good

37:23

at listening and having a

37:23

conversation. Are you a great

37:28

neurosurgeon. I just I want us

37:28

to remember those those things

37:36

that your grandma teaches you.

37:38

The other yeah, I mean, this skills that make you a whole person, right? No,

37:40

and I think yeah, there's been

37:46

so many great things that you've

37:46

pointed out and I've loved the

37:48

snippets that you've shared from

37:48

your book. As we close up I

37:50

would love for you to share like

37:50

another one or two like the

37:53

genius soup you know, just being

37:53

able to be efficient and be you

37:57

know, intentional and then the

37:57

doughnuts like okay, let's just

38:01

do a healthy alternative to

38:01

this. What would be a couple

38:04

other things from the book you'd

38:04

want to share as we go.

38:08

Well, one thing I

38:08

hope people will do is learn how

38:12

to eat more greens. And because

38:12

our culture doesn't really

38:18

promote that particularly and

38:18

and this connects to having the

38:22

pot of greens on the sink, I

38:22

always have scissors handy and

38:28

almost everything that I end up

38:28

cooking or serving gets parsley,

38:34

or oregano or basil or something

38:34

snipped up under it or over it.

38:41

Including, here's a cheat you're

38:41

gonna love this. If you have a

38:45

great taqueria in your

38:45

neighborhood anywhere and I do

38:49

and we're on the coast so they

38:49

have a cheat for me that I love

38:53

is a great shrimp burrito. And I

38:53

I asked them to do it with no

38:59

rice and they always remember

38:59

that they know you know what,

39:02

what we ordered when we come in.

39:02

So a shrimp burrito if you can

39:06

get really good tortillas,

39:06

spinach or something great, but

39:11

shrimp burrito, no rice, cut it

39:11

in half. Don't eat the whole

39:15

thing. It's two meals worth. Cut

39:15

it in half. Put it on a bed of

39:22

slice cabbage or arugula. And if

39:22

you have radishes, great chop

39:28

them up, they're so beautiful,

39:28

purple cabbage, radishes and

39:32

then this half a burrito and

39:32

then sprinkle some cheese or

39:36

cheese-like substance. You know

39:36

if you've got vegan cheese,

39:39

that's great sprinkles on top,

39:39

put more green salsa, my

39:43

favorite on top of it. So that's

39:43

vegetables, all vegetables. And

39:49

then you get and it's absolutely

39:49

delicious and that's two meals

39:54

instead of one meal. So just

39:54

keep trying to think of ways you

39:59

don't have to be eating solid

39:59

bowls of of salad all the time.

40:06

Just add greens always have

40:06

cabbage and arugula, and a

40:11

couple of other things that are

40:11

green, or purple, and chop them

40:15

up and throw them under an over

40:15

anything you're doing. And they

40:19

make it look better. It looks

40:19

more appetizing. It's got a

40:23

great texture that crunches.

40:23

Good. So that doesn't add

40:28

cooking steps really well. It's

40:28

a step I guess. But it's so

40:33

easy, right. And if you're not,

40:33

you're not taking away you're

40:39

adding, actually, to your

40:39

pleasure and to the taste, and

40:44

the texture of your food. And

40:44

that's what I'm all about. I

40:48

don't want to be deprived of

40:48

anything good. I want all

40:51

wonderful. And, and I think

40:51

you're teaching your kids to

40:56

appreciate the beauty of food,

40:56

you know that you don't just

41:00

narf it down, right? Look what

41:00

you just made. It's purple and

41:04

red and orange is got stuff on

41:04

top and you know, put a flower

41:09

on it and enjoy the whole ritual

41:09

of eating. Even if it starts

41:14

with a takeout burrito. I love

41:14

it.

41:21

I love it. Tell

41:21

us, thank you again for this

41:24

conversation. It's been so fun

41:24

to chat, tell us more where

41:27

people can find you find your

41:27

work at the book.

41:31

If you go on

41:31

LynneBowman.com that tells you

41:34

everything. Because I do on on

41:34

Instagram and I have a YouTube

41:38

channel. It's it's not

41:38

beautifully curated. I just slap

41:41

stuff up there. But you're

41:41

welcome to come on and look at

41:45

it because there's lots of

41:45

parenting advice there for you

41:48

particularly. So and that's just

41:48

the Lynn Bowman, YouTube

41:52

channel. So Lynnebowman.com gets

41:52

you all rest. Just remember my

41:58

name is L-Y-N-N-E B-O-W-M-A-N.

41:58

The book is available on Amazon.

42:07

And it's in paperback and

42:07

hardback. And you can download

42:10

it and just see how you like it.

42:10

Because that's not doesn't cost

42:14

you much. And I know you'll love

42:14

it. And then you'll need the

42:17

hardback, it makes a great gift.

42:17

The subtitle is a cookbook for

42:22

diabetics and the people who

42:22

love them. Don't be scared by

42:27

that. What that means is there's

42:27

no sugar in the book, The it's

42:31

all healthy stuff, that if

42:31

you've got kidney problems, if

42:36

you've got heart disease, if

42:36

you've got kids that are having

42:39

a weight issue, any of those

42:39

things, this book gives you what

42:43

you need in really simple terms.

42:43

So the title of it is brownies

42:48

for breakfast, and it's on

42:48

Amazon, you can also ask for it

42:54

at your independent bookseller.

42:54

They'll order it for you. And

43:00

there you go. I hope you will

43:00

check it out. I have very good

43:03

reviews, I'm happy to say. But

43:03

that helps you if you go on

43:06

Amazon, you can read what other

43:06

people have experienced in the

43:10

book. And that that will tell

43:10

you if it's something that

43:12

you're interested in. And I hope

43:12

you are.

43:15

Yeah, yeah.

43:15

Thank you so much.

43:18

Thank you.

43:20

Well, what did

43:20

you think? I really appreciated

43:23

the down to Earth way she

43:23

approaches family meals and just

43:28

food with kids. I liked the

43:28

simplicity of it. And I really

43:32

love the ideas she shared on

43:32

ways to connect around the

43:36

dinner table. And it's gonna

43:36

look different for each of us

43:39

depending on our circumstances.

43:39

But if we bring that mindset of

43:43

being intentional to those

43:43

meals, there's so much that we

43:46

can be gaining from those

43:46

interactions with our kiddos.

43:49

I'd love to hear what your

43:49

favorite part of the show was.

43:52

See you next time. Thanks for

43:52

tuning in. You've just finished

43:56

an episode of The Stress Nanny

43:56

podcast. So hopefully you feel a

43:59

little more empowered when it

43:59

comes to dealing with stress.

44:02

Feel free to take a deep breath

44:02

and let it out slowly as you go

44:06

back to your day. I'm so glad

44:06

you're here. If you're a

44:10

longtime listener, thank you so

44:10

much for your support. It really

44:13

means the world to me. If you're

44:13

new, I'd love to have you follow

44:16

the podcast and join me each

44:16

week. And no matter how long

44:19

you've been listening, please

44:19

share this episode with someone

44:22

who is stressed out. If you

44:22

enjoyed the show, would you

44:25

please do me a favor and go to

44:25

ratethispodcast.com/thestressnanny

44:30

and leave a review. The link is

44:30

in the show notes. I'm so

44:33

grateful for all my listeners.

44:33

Thank you again for being here.

44:36

Until next time.