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Longest in the Game (ft Carrot Top)

Longest in the Game (ft Carrot Top)

Released Thursday, 1st February 2024
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Longest in the Game (ft Carrot Top)

Longest in the Game (ft Carrot Top)

Longest in the Game (ft Carrot Top)

Longest in the Game (ft Carrot Top)

Thursday, 1st February 2024
Good episode? Give it some love!
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Episode Transcript

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0:01

You probably know the atlas Butler

0:04

phone number. 1-800-FURN-US. But

0:08

maybe you don't know. You can

0:10

also call... 1-800-FURN-US. for

0:13

the highest quality plumbing services.

0:15

Clog drain? 1-800-FURN-US.

0:17

Leaky pipe.

0:20

1-800-FURN-US. Yes, the Atlas

0:22

Butler phone number says furnace. Yes, the Atlas Butler phone

0:24

number he says Kinda weird for plumbing. But hey,

0:26

life is weird sometimes. furnace. Kind of weird for plumbing. but hey my life

0:28

is weird sometimes. Ladies

0:30

Ever seen a platypus? is

0:34

a very exciting day. We've

0:37

talked about him on the show a handful of

0:39

times. I would consider him part of

0:41

the lore of the show. Ladies and

0:43

gentlemen, make some noise at home in your car or

0:45

wherever. But we don't only care at top. Oh, hello

0:48

everybody. I like that you

0:50

mentioned me before. Was it all good? It

0:52

was. After you worried you, right? Yeah, no, no,

0:54

no. I've been talking about it all the time. It was. But

0:57

I will say, some

1:00

people's entry point to you was your

1:02

wardrobe malfunction on TikTok. Do you remember

1:04

this? Oh, God. Oh,

1:06

God. Was it like my wiener?

1:08

Yes. Yeah, it was

1:10

like bouncing around. Yeah, yeah. Yeah, well, that's a

1:12

good introduction. Yeah, yeah. That introduction. Now they know

1:15

you're working. Yeah, I can add work. I mean,

1:17

right. It's kind of hard to tune away now. Yeah. Capture

1:20

them at that moment. They have to buy

1:22

a ticket. Yeah, and I'm an idiot. I don't even know. I'm

1:25

going to dance around my house and my friend's side.

1:27

Did you see what you posted? I'm like, what? Your

1:30

dick is like... And I went back and looked.

1:33

I'm like, oh, man, it is. Wow. Oh,

1:36

I respect you for just looking at that and then carrying on.

1:38

Yeah, I just... Yeah, I know it. Yeah. Well,

1:43

hell yeah, man. Thank God I have a big one. Yeah. Yeah.

1:48

Thank God. Is it right? Then they'd be like, oh, you see

1:50

them? Yeah. It's like this

1:52

little... Yeah. Yeah. So,

1:55

yeah. So, how many times do you watch it a

1:57

day? I mean... form

2:12

a a

2:57

a a a

3:02

a a

3:06

a a

3:11

a a a

3:17

a a

3:24

a a

3:28

a a

3:36

a a

3:44

a a

3:53

a a a

3:59

a 20

4:02

something, 20 20s. Yeah.

4:04

So I didn't know what I was doing. I had

4:06

no clue. I haven't told them that.

4:08

Yeah. I didn't. You know, ready, set and I'm

4:11

like, you know, I don't know what I'm doing.

4:13

And they're like, yeah, you're good. And action.

4:15

I don't know what I'm doing. And

4:18

they just say this, you know, well, it turned out

4:20

okay, because we, you know, the more we got into

4:22

the more you took, you know, I could I do

4:24

stand up. So stand up is way different than movies

4:27

and every aspect of it. And, you know,

4:29

Larry Miller was a brilliant comic that was on the

4:31

one of the cast members. And he, he took me

4:33

aside one day, we were watching the dailies and he

4:35

says, you want to see, can I give you

4:37

a little tip? And I said, please give

4:39

me anything. And he brought me in and

4:42

he said, you see how you're when you're doing this? Let

4:44

me show you this scene we did today. So he did

4:46

something with his, his eyebrow,

4:48

just he just by moving his eyebrow, got

4:51

the got the laugh, it was the punch line,

4:54

watching that little one move as opposed to me,

4:56

you know, jumping around and trying to but but

4:58

then again, it was always props. And so I

5:00

was part of it, I had to be kind

5:02

of bigger than life, jilly, because I'm jumping around

5:05

with big props and surfboards and all this stuff.

5:07

But the actual scenes where you

5:09

had to be serious, he learned, I learned a

5:11

lot, like this scene with Jack Warden. I mean,

5:13

it was a cool kind of a cool scene.

5:16

Yeah. Yeah, I mean, for all the, you

5:18

know, whatever shit people used to give you, you

5:20

did a lot of crazy. Yeah.

5:23

I mean, it's awesome. Actually,

5:25

the the scene where the

5:28

woman flushes the toilet. Yes.

5:30

So it's funny, because my

5:32

cousins, they show like they showed me this movie, I

5:34

think I was maybe like six or seven, we were

5:36

all about the same age. And they like they love

5:39

the movie. They're like, you gotta watch Chairman of the

5:41

Board. So we watched Chairman of the Board. And that

5:44

scene, for some reason, was like

5:46

stamped in my mind. And I'm

5:49

not exaggerating for the rest of my life. I've

5:51

always had this thought that while

5:53

I'm taking a shower, someone's gonna storm the

5:55

bathroom and flush the toilet and turn the

5:57

water cold. So In a weird way. That's

6:00

the impact. Know you're a fan. Got

6:02

my life you live from in fear

6:04

in the soured it will soon movie

6:06

making a meme there you know I

6:08

go back and look x get some

6:10

a run in a Civil Props a

6:12

team of the then of is it

6:14

was suicide yeah now. So.

6:16

You've been in the game a long

6:18

time. Yeah, yeah as it over thirty

6:21

years at this point. Oh yeah, yeah

6:23

yeah. I'm I'm Thirty Nine Thirty nine.

6:25

Oh my God. And vote on Forty.

6:28

That's M Adamant for your next year.

6:30

The Forty years. Yeah, Forty Years He

6:32

remembered. I'm. On the veteran

6:34

now yeah of bench an old guy which

6:36

is cool it yeah i like as the

6:38

reality is it is i guess me think

6:41

about when you meet when you're not his

6:43

school of be young kid that once to

6:45

ask. The. Will guide slam that they

6:47

will get that a young people in

6:49

a real kids wanna say what's your

6:52

take on this isn't this fun Their

6:54

be son visit diverse roles yeah I

6:56

still do a child yeah but as

6:58

we're on whether don't do memory like

7:01

just for the people as thing that

7:03

aren't familiar like with your entire career

7:05

do member like one of your first

7:07

performances ever like a jovial that absolutely

7:10

This is of the rent skill or

7:12

in the in the cause I'm. A

7:15

librarian had so room office sinuses and

7:17

that they serve beer at night. And

7:20

know there's a stage us to do what

7:22

he calls I go there and do have

7:24

been a comedy innocence great indian added as

7:26

and on our do a buddy of mine

7:29

doing so I went up there has to

7:31

start telling job yes I mean like George

7:33

Carlin jokes and a Richard Pryor jokes and

7:35

you know jokes and had been set for

7:37

not my stuff cs and it was just

7:39

said to come from wind up doing it

7:41

and and be laughing that i i sorry

7:43

like this and than a couple more times

7:46

came by the said. They

7:48

would ask me actually, hey, duel in

7:50

Wednesday's you animate dead like comedy night

7:52

so I said sure. So every Wednesday

7:54

I would have convinced thirty becoming more

7:56

popular than the kids would come and

7:58

drink beers and. In an a

8:01

little show and they would start

8:03

slowly progress in to them my

8:05

own material years as after doing.

8:08

Others jokes and so I

8:10

started thinking of birth awaited.

8:13

To. Come up my own jokes.

8:15

In my first proper was a a

8:17

a neighborhood crime much sign for guess

8:20

and them made stolen it. It

8:22

was on my dorm xy I just rip them off

8:24

my dorm I walked in, i said sorry I'm late,

8:26

knows the neighborhood and held up signs and I said

8:29

how good is or grandma she's in I'm watching the

8:31

sign or. And

8:33

have a laugh. Namesake was clever and funny

8:35

and new. He has kind of rice, told

8:37

the size of his ally, elements of a

8:39

to find year and was smart you know

8:41

is explicitly who go Get or Kremlin sense

8:43

of. And then I started again. I need

8:45

to have more were signs may be like

8:48

think it's so went through the city boca

8:50

and I literally said that's a funny sign.

8:52

Tubes was on a train or is it know

8:54

the train horn. Between these hours and my deaths,

8:56

the hours you need to train Horn geek Hint:

8:58

see the trees here. It is like hold that

9:00

one down. And then I did.

9:03

There is a main. The main road they went

9:05

through Boca Raton was Com Butts Road. yeah so

9:07

I said the ah to get that when he

9:09

does Israel. The ass holes left the as slow

9:11

it was just started become a little I'm. A

9:14

sign bet you know and I had always

9:16

like fifteen different signs that slow children at

9:18

play. If you look at the signed is

9:20

this day them a stick figure with no

9:22

feet as one of the slow the internet

9:24

me see this as a so it was

9:26

also people seen in oh no I go

9:28

that's funny I see the Sunday dinner and

9:30

put this into the ah yes so it's

9:32

gonna come up with the things that were

9:34

M. M people that

9:36

influenced me comedy were like people that wrote

9:39

like George Carlin began to come up with

9:41

that were or gallagher like act and as

9:43

a gag where he we'd see. But.

9:45

Was also clever like you can make itself know like not

9:48

like just holding it does coffee cup he would have to

9:50

be something that would be. In yeah

9:52

that would have do something. I was

9:54

it. You know I'm A, I'm

9:56

sure. That was a pretty

9:58

crazy moment to. be

10:01

acknowledged by Carlin because didn't

10:03

you know like if you're

10:05

saying in college you say his material is

10:07

like right you know right just to give

10:10

it a shot and then you

10:12

eventually you know his name

10:14

comes out of his face I mean

10:16

that must have been insane for you I show it my show overnight

10:18

I do I think about been influenced in my

10:21

life and it was a tradition my friends but

10:23

I was sitting on a couch just like this

10:25

yeah and we watch the HBO special every time

10:27

it aired and so my

10:29

buddies when I'll sit down and we hit play

10:31

and we watch the George Carlin special and then

10:33

sure enough we're just watching it and he says

10:35

you know who packed your bags he says you

10:37

didn't pack your bags he says no carrot top

10:39

pack my bags and I'm

10:42

sitting on my friends like what

10:44

the right the only moment the

10:46

boner you know so like

10:48

sorry fellas I had no idea that big boner back huge

10:52

back that's right everyone's knows about

10:54

now so I can't lie what

10:56

it was everywhere yeah so

10:59

that was it's still my still watch it my watch

11:01

it nightly I still it's still exciting because I think

11:03

George Carlin you know saying your name yeah you first

11:05

get in the business you know you you're

11:07

watching them and thinking about people like that that are

11:10

mentors and you get the he says your name

11:12

it's yeah that's a cool moment because and everyone you

11:14

know would lie if they said they didn't get excited

11:17

their mentor mentioned their name so hey guys

11:19

we want to take a quick break to

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Searing Florida, your work and signs

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or Kono with material San at

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the time. What are you studying?

12:21

Marketing Marketing yet a degree in marketing

12:23

and then when into comedy which is

12:25

the normal thing Radio? yeah but damn

12:27

near as and is my marketing degree

12:29

noom and never. Pursued

12:32

the comedy thing and then I

12:34

got out of exec couldn't Good

12:36

gig you know, gonna gigs together

12:38

so sorry shucking oysters and doing

12:40

mean I'm. Guessing

12:42

peoples' weights, fair and and businesses

12:44

gigs and then one day. Which

12:47

I find to be really kind of

12:49

cool. Story was a second oysters and

12:51

this this couple came in his to

12:53

compulsively and I was do minute my

12:55

normal me know. I would has

12:57

a jukebox on his own. On him as

12:59

jukebox the plays music, plays music. his assistant

13:02

and I'm. I would dance

13:04

around the bar you know, like Mick Jagger

13:06

seem Tigers dummies was on its while second

13:08

oysters and is kind of making people laugh

13:10

and. Discover.

13:13

Just like. Stamina God you looks

13:15

like this. this comedian you must have a

13:17

twin like of hims A I see of

13:19

God forbid I have a twin and I

13:21

said no it is a guy. Swear to

13:23

God you have a twin and he's He

13:25

lives and he does Zebra You go by

13:28

Carrot Top and. And. That the

13:30

as I get carrot Top are some

13:32

guys like Awesome! We disarm in Tampa.

13:35

And I'm thinking oh well really they go

13:37

the main. he looked like mom is weird.

13:40

like the mannerisms and everything. As a yeah,

13:42

never been a look him up. And

13:44

then. now and try to

13:46

pursue to and have those people med kind of

13:48

come in said that i probably would never be

13:50

while so they came in and they they made

13:52

seen me and said there was great so yeah

13:54

some their says went back and started to get

13:57

some gigs together in the night then of course

13:59

i didn't stop him back for yeah

14:01

till now now am I did

14:03

is Wikipedia lying to me or like your

14:05

parents were NASA my father was your dad

14:07

worked for NASA my father worked in NASA

14:09

yeah that's all when you hear Houston we

14:12

have a problem you hear Larry right after

14:14

that yeah yeah yeah I worked at NASA

14:16

and I trained astronauts you know

14:20

I didn't even think anything of it when your kid

14:23

you didn't think your dad's a nerd means he's gonna go to

14:25

work of course and I mean he said you want to go

14:27

to you know a launch I'm like no I don't want to

14:29

go to a launch I'm gonna watch Brady Bunch so

14:33

you drag me down to the Space Center and you

14:35

know watch launches all the time and one

14:38

in particular was I think it was four

14:40

thirteen and my dad says we're

14:42

going to launch I was like man so I go

14:45

down there I'm you're gonna meet Bob Crippen and

14:47

John Young I mean these are the these are going up in

14:49

the space shuttle is a big deal and

14:51

so I said you don't care and

14:53

there's it was they had two tents and they had

14:56

a tent for like like

14:58

hot dogs and cokes and sodas and whatnot they

15:00

had a beer tent so

15:02

my dad says what do you want what do you

15:04

want I said I don't know just a coke and

15:06

a hot dog and my dad says looked at the

15:08

line a beer line was so long

15:10

and the coke line was three

15:13

times his line so my dad

15:15

says you're drinking a fucking beer I am

15:17

he's like yeah I'm like all right don't

15:22

tell your mom but I'm not waiting that fucking coke

15:25

beer you're gonna get a beer here drink it it's

15:27

fine so I remember he gave

15:29

me the beer and I remember watching the launch

15:31

and I think I think I saw three launches

15:33

yeah yeah that was so loopy and

15:36

I did I kept you know are you okay I'm saying I

15:38

don't like this stuff it's not very good and I get home

15:40

and I my mom's like how was the launch I'm like I

15:42

think it was great I got drunk my dad what did you

15:44

think it drug you know now you know I threw

15:47

my dad on the bus you're not supposed to tell your mom you had

15:49

beer so yeah so that's my first

15:51

beer didn't at a launch at NASA I

15:54

do that's one of one yeah yeah pretty incredible

15:56

it was a it was a cool you know

15:58

growing up with my dad working I

16:01

think that's why maybe probably got some of

16:03

my creative side

16:06

of me from my father

16:08

being an engineer and being

16:10

creative. He made things at

16:12

NASA that were instrumental

16:15

too that still work

16:17

today, the clamps that hold the 747

16:19

onto the shuttle so

16:21

they could transport it from California. He made

16:24

the little clamp to hold it that released

16:26

it too. I remember him stressing over that

16:28

one day at work at home. I said,

16:30

what are you making? I got a goddamn

16:33

clamp or it's going to

16:35

be heavy enough to hold the shuttle

16:37

and it's got the shuttle off the

16:39

747. I'm like, I'm just making

16:42

spaghetti if you want to come help me. I'm

16:44

making some doodles. That's

16:47

awesome. So you grow up with

16:49

a space engineer. Yeah. And then

16:51

my mom was the fun one. She had a tennis

16:53

shop and so I played tennis and she

16:56

had more free spirit and

16:59

so it's fun. So

17:01

then fast forward again to

17:03

the oyster shucking couple. So

17:06

they give you the spark. You get back in.

17:09

Was it like you're obviously

17:11

performing? I'm assuming you're touring. Was it

17:13

like a TV spot that really kind

17:16

of blew everything up or did it

17:18

kind of… Well, I

17:20

mean I had a weird… I have an interesting kind

17:23

of study story with my career because a

17:25

lot of people get like a show and

17:27

they become that way. I

17:32

always did it… They call it grassroots in a sense

17:34

where there's a lot of bands that

17:37

do this. They're touring bands and they're

17:39

grassroots marketing and they just hit

17:41

the country worldwide and they didn't particularly

17:43

do a TV show or even have

17:46

a hit on the radio. But

17:48

they're popular so I was kind of in

17:50

the sense part that, part not. I was

17:52

hitting so many college campuses and doing all

17:54

these colleges, I'd do like two a day.

17:56

Two a day? Yeah, two

17:58

a day. One in the morning. at their cafeteria

18:00

and then one at their evening at their night

18:02

at their like arena. Wow.

18:05

And then the next morning go to the next college and I'm like Notre Dame

18:07

and UCLA and Ohio State and you

18:09

name every college I probably hit

18:11

twice. So I had this kind of cult

18:16

following in a sense with the college

18:19

peep kids and I mean we'd go to a town at

18:21

their college and it would be like jam. And

18:24

then I would get a call and say hey you want

18:26

to do Regis and Kathie Lee or

18:29

the Sonicshia. So I would go on Regis and Kathie Lee

18:31

which is like 90 year old ladies.

18:34

I would do my show and then they loved it

18:36

and then the people at college would be like well

18:38

we saw him at our college and then I'd do

18:40

the Sonicshia and that'd be more like middle America. So

18:43

I was kind of hitting and then I had a show

18:45

on the Cartoon Network. So I was kind of hitting every

18:47

demographic almost at the same time where people

18:49

were like oh I saw him on my college show.

18:51

Oh I saw him on the Sonicshia. I saw him

18:53

on an AT&T commercial. So

18:56

it became just kind

18:58

of everywhere. One

19:02

particular show I think really made

19:04

me go. It

19:07

was all of the combination of all those shows. Yeah. It

19:10

was just that momentum that you were doing.

19:12

Right. It wasn't a particular sitcom

19:14

or show. I mean doing the tight shows and

19:16

all those other shows were very helpful

19:18

because they were late night shows and back then they

19:21

had a lot of the greatings. I

19:24

would argue that's essentially what people

19:26

are doing the same thing now. It's just like

19:28

the internet exposes you to a lot of young

19:31

people. Sure. Absolutely.

19:33

It's funny because I was just

19:36

watching some interviews you had

19:38

done and I pulled

19:40

up two comments that I

19:42

thought were funny and some

19:44

were cool. But this

19:47

one, this guy came to my college canvas

19:49

back in 1994 and was the funniest comic

19:51

I've ever seen. He blew everyone away. When I

19:53

would go through the comments, this

19:55

was that Rogan clip. 4,000

20:00

comments there and a lot of them are

20:03

recounting like you Coming

20:05

to their college. No cool. Yeah, and I thought

20:07

it was pretty like amazing how many people remembered

20:09

you and they had very like detailed Stories like

20:11

oh, I was here and oh, yeah. Yeah, and

20:14

there's usually just they're all plastered drunk I don't

20:16

know if they remember that yeah, yeah, I remember

20:18

anything This

20:21

one I thought was kind of interesting. I'm

20:23

on my fifth caretop video And

20:26

I'm starting to really like this guy. So it took five videos

20:31

All right, yeah He

20:34

really got the shit of it his whole

20:36

career and he's still in there there's ever

20:38

going to be an advocate for Bull

20:40

for bullies for victims of bullying. It

20:42

will be carrot top. Yeah, okay.

20:45

This is the part I thought was super interesting if

20:48

he was ever put into war he'd be the guy

20:50

you want in your platoon He

20:52

would have many skills to think of ways to

20:54

fool the enemy and he'd be so loyal to

20:56

those who had his back All

20:59

right. I thought those are roundabout way of

21:02

just trying to pay you a compliment. Yeah, I guess yeah I

21:04

guess they're thinking that I would have some some

21:06

maneuvers some way with some proper something to protect

21:08

us and go at the enemy

21:11

Yeah, yeah, hopefully that would happen I

21:14

would be Love

21:16

me. Yeah, I would probably protect you if you

21:18

like me the first time around. Yeah, it took

21:20

five times Yeah, yeah, you're

21:23

not in my platoon. Yeah, I guess five battles

21:25

then it would take yeah Yeah, yeah for you

21:27

to be on his you

21:29

know his favorite list But yeah, man, you

21:32

know, I thought it was interesting how you kind of called out

21:34

in your career You know when people would give you flack or

21:36

whatever, you know You

21:38

would finish doing a big show and then

21:40

you'd see someone giving you shit and you'd

21:42

like wrestling with that juxtaposition I think I

21:45

would say a lot of people I

21:48

think in entertainment now Like

21:51

I don't know it may maybe feel differently But when

21:53

I hear you speak about these things, I almost feel

21:55

that you were charting a lot of

21:57

waters that I think people experience now Or

22:00

when someone gets kind of well known on the

22:02

internet, not for a huge dong but maybe

22:04

for something else, you know, they

22:08

get this weird like imposter syndrome. And I'll talk

22:10

to people and they'll be like, oh, I put

22:12

something out. A lot of people like it but

22:15

I see people making fun of it or I see people, you know,

22:18

in disagreement with it. I

22:21

guess like as a young guy

22:23

going through that, did

22:25

you – what were those moments like

22:27

where you kind of had to block that out and keep doing your

22:29

thing? Yeah, that's exactly kind of what

22:31

I did. I would

22:33

just – I would like go back

22:36

as something as silly as to consider

22:38

the source, you know. Yeah, yeah, I

22:40

remember saying that. But I would

22:42

just think, wait a minute, I was talking

22:44

to George Carlin yesterday and he was

22:46

telling me how funny I am and then

22:49

I got this Yahoo and some

22:51

internet site saying that I'm

22:54

a piece of junk and worthless and

22:56

a hack and whatever and

22:58

not funny and just whatever.

23:00

And I'd say, oh,

23:03

you had to wait and find to block that out

23:05

and just go think of the George Carlin and that's

23:08

kind of what you did, you know. Thank God I

23:10

had so many positive people over

23:14

the negatives because you know what, that's usually another thing

23:16

too. I mean, I've got a lot

23:18

of love. I mean, that's why I've been doing this so long.

23:21

I have the show and we're still jamming out the

23:23

show so if no one was coming to

23:25

the shows anymore and it was not – then I

23:27

would start thinking, oh, maybe they're right. But

23:30

it's still jamming and you're still doing it and so

23:32

you just – I've always kind of just kept to

23:35

my own thing. I always thought even way, way back

23:37

when I was young, I would say,

23:39

I'm not going to worry about other

23:41

comics, you know, what they're doing because I

23:43

have to do my act anyhow. So everything

23:45

I did in my

23:47

act was something I thought of and

23:49

I never even stopped once to think what the

23:51

other guy was doing. I barely ever watched other

23:53

comics because I was preparing to do mine. And

23:56

if I did see a comic that was funny, I would say, God, in

23:59

fact, that was funny. And I

24:01

had many, many friends. There were thousands of

24:03

friends that are comics that we were like best

24:05

of friends and we all dig

24:07

each other's act and everyone's different styles

24:09

and that's what makes it funny. I

24:11

mean sitting in a room with a

24:13

lunch table with all comics is priceless.

24:17

I mean everyone's got their own little shtick and

24:19

their mood and their thing and everyone

24:21

makes you laugh. But that's

24:23

how you go through it. You take all the love and you don't

24:25

work. You filter out the other. You've got

24:27

to filter out the hate. Because

24:29

there's always going to be that. If

24:32

everyone loved Caratop it wouldn't be any fun. You've

24:34

got to have a little bit of... But

24:37

there's more love than there's hate. Yeah I was going to say. If

24:39

I have a joke where a joke doesn't do well and it's kind

24:42

of meant to be just

24:44

so I can do the Carson-ish

24:46

kind of thing. Just so the

24:48

joke bombs I can do this kind of look and

24:50

I do this thing. Everybody always says the

24:52

funniest part of the show is when a joke doesn't

24:54

work and you do this thing. I said yeah because I

24:56

only do it like twice. The whole

24:58

show is that. It's

25:00

not funny. The show has to be funny and you

25:03

have that one moment or two where you've got to

25:05

dig on yourself for a not joke. You know a

25:07

joke not working. But for the most part the most

25:09

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26:14

Yeah, I was going to say I think at a point it's probably

26:16

not, I

26:20

wouldn't say easy, but it's reasonable that

26:22

if you're continuously getting a lot of

26:24

love, you can... ...you

26:27

can convince yourself, I can trust this and

26:30

I don't have to listen to this other stuff. And

26:32

I mean if people keep showing up to see you,

26:35

how right can the people be who are always

26:37

trying to take the chunk out of you? They

26:40

almost need you there. Yeah, I

26:42

just think it's, I mean the length of

26:45

your career is like, it's fucking awesome man,

26:47

it's just super impressive. The length of my

26:49

penis too. Yeah, let's not forget. Don't

26:51

go back to that again, but I'm sorry, I had to. I

26:55

have it on loop, so it's hard for me to get it out of my mind. We all do. Yeah.

27:01

Yeah, dude. It

27:04

seems like you still love it though. My penis? Yeah.

27:08

I love, I love, absolutely, I love this job more

27:10

than anything in the world and I find it to

27:13

be, because everyone says to me like, dude, when are

27:15

you going to retire and when are you going to

27:17

get... Like you still have fun

27:20

and I don't know how, yeah, I have more fun

27:22

now than I, and I don't know

27:24

the exact, one that I maybe just wonder you

27:26

realize you, you, you just

27:28

kind of got into a rhythm and you kind of know what you're

27:30

doing so you feel a little better. Yeah. Because

27:33

I did tell George Carlin that one time. I asked

27:35

him as an idiot, I didn't know what

27:37

he, I just said, what's it like to

27:39

be you where you got it all, like you got it.

27:41

Yeah. And he said,

27:44

what are you talking about? And I said, you know,

27:46

you're like, you're George Carlin, you don't go up there and

27:48

like, you're like, you, you, you kill it every night because

27:50

you're, you're, you're a polished pro. It must be nice to

27:52

have that feeling when you go up there that you're just

27:54

going to nail it again. And he said, I ain't like,

27:56

shit, I don't know, I'm still learning every day, I don't,

27:58

I even know what you're talking about. talking about. So pardon

28:01

me, I think he meant, you know, he's

28:03

just a perfectionist but I think it probably is nice to

28:05

have a, I mean I do go up

28:07

there now with a pretty good, I know of my

28:09

flow and my outline of where I'm gonna go and

28:12

what's gonna, you kind of, I mean

28:14

you don't bomb anymore, you can't,

28:17

it's kind of bound proof. So

28:19

you know how to do the show, you know, how

28:22

to take every crowd in beginning to end. You might have

28:24

one that just, you know, last week we had one that

28:26

the crowd wouldn't so hot but we've made fun of the

28:28

fact that the crowd wasn't so hot. Then

28:31

the crowd was great, like you just had to

28:33

work them around. You got to take a two

28:35

to a ten. Yeah. You just don't take a

28:37

ten to a two. Yes. That's what

28:39

you don't want to do. Yeah. They were so good and

28:41

then I fucked it up. Yeah. I was gonna do it

28:43

again. I'm like very familiar

28:46

taking a two to a ten. Yeah, you

28:48

can do it. Yeah. Yeah. So how many

28:52

days a week do you perform now?

28:55

Six. Yeah. My manager has a car payment

28:57

so I have to work. Yeah, we got to make sure. Yeah,

28:59

Ferraris man, they don't pay themselves.

29:03

I'm not a Ferrari guy. No, no. I'm

29:06

a pickup truck guy. Yeah, I mean I'm a

29:08

trucker hat and this is me dressed up by

29:10

the way. Yeah. You make your clothes. I like

29:12

to look homeless so people don't ask me for

29:14

money. That

29:16

guy's broke. He's a good strategist. Yeah. They never

29:18

asked me. That guy doesn't have a fucking dime.

29:20

No. Yeah. No strangers and no family. They want

29:23

to come after you. Yeah. You dress broke, no

29:25

one ask you for anything. Yeah. But

29:27

you make your clothes. Is that right? I do. I mean

29:29

I'm almost everything I kind of if I don't

29:31

make full of it, I will add two or

29:33

yeah or do something like I've added the patch

29:36

on the front or I'll add this or add

29:38

something some paint and do something to it. Yeah.

29:40

Kind of make it mine. Yeah. That thing

29:43

is cool man. So you're doing six nights a

29:45

week and I'm sure this you

29:47

know I'm partially digging into this because again

29:49

I want everyone

29:51

listening to this to kind of get the full scope

29:53

of you and you've

29:56

been doing that how many years now roughly? Sure

30:00

in Vegas and yeah about 30 something

30:02

years. Okay, okay, so 30 some and

30:06

Just done them still performing out there. No, I

30:08

think he comes in and out in and out He

30:10

does it but got it. He's not there full-time. I

30:12

don't believe Miss somebody

30:14

shows that you know, that's nothing that's changed with

30:16

Vegas You know when I first started doing that's

30:19

what I wanted to ask you is how is

30:21

like I guess because I would imagine in the

30:23

crowds you would see a change or like yeah

30:25

You know what I guess what was

30:27

it like when you first started and what do they feel

30:29

like now? It's it's it's

30:32

completely different. I'll tell you I mean them

30:34

still There's still awesome

30:36

audiences, but yeah The

30:38

times have changed and the things in the number of shows

30:40

and playing it sounds weird though Like

30:42

when I started it was before MGM Grand was built. So

30:44

there was like There's

30:46

no New York New York with a Bellagio. There's

30:48

no wind. There's no encore. Yeah, so there was you

30:51

know, Caesar's Bally's a

30:53

few other ones and that was it so there on

30:56

any given night. There's probably a

30:58

dozen shows doesn't showrooms and

31:01

now there's 100

31:03

showrooms. Yeah, maybe yeah, so

31:06

all everything in that aspect has changed

31:08

you just the growth and the and the number of Shows

31:12

that are there and the kind of shows are there, you

31:14

know when I was there too when I first started They're

31:16

like Vegas and like then that's where you go to like,

31:19

you know retire, right? No, I

31:22

said no, that's Branson bitch And

31:28

here Branson's were you but Not

31:32

off by Vegas, you know So

31:34

I said Vegas is not that are you talking about

31:37

this? Yeah, Vegas is like, you know, Wayne Newton and

31:39

I kept thinking I know but I still thought it

31:41

was a cool aspect to it And then all of

31:43

a sudden I mean within the last ten years It

31:47

was like Elton John. Well Celine was probably the first one

31:49

that made a big Celine Dion came and That

31:52

was huge. Yeah, I mean and we had a joke

31:54

when she's working. She's Celine Dion and she's not she

31:57

Celine D off Yeah, but um, she

31:59

had She had this big

32:01

thing and then they got Elton

32:03

John and they got Rod Stewart and they got

32:06

the Rolling Stones and the Eagles and

32:08

Kiss and then all of a sudden Everyone

32:11

wants to play Vegas. Yeah, and so, you

32:14

know, you go there. I'll be back there

32:16

today You go be flying and then you

32:18

got everyone from Usher to you

32:20

know, carry Katy Perry to I mean everybody Yeah,

32:22

so it went from you know, no one wanted

32:24

to play Vegas to being in kind of a

32:26

no, I need I need to play Vegas Did

32:29

you did you have feelings about that like because you were one

32:31

of the same for I stayed through thick and thin Yeah, yeah,

32:33

well, I always had a feeling like from the beginning. I thought

32:35

I was a great gig. I mean You're

32:38

in Vegas and you're not just a aspect

32:40

of idea of not traveling Was

32:43

also nice as well, you know, you'd stay in your

32:45

instead of getting on a bus in a hotel you

32:47

stay in your own room Yeah, do

32:49

a show and you go home. Yeah, that's very

32:52

rare in the show business Some

32:54

oh You know, how many bus

32:57

tours do you think you've done in your career? Oh my god,

32:59

we Thousands

33:01

I mean that's all I did. I turned

33:03

down the Vegas gig in the

33:05

beginning because I was a bus guy Yeah, and

33:08

they kept asking me if I did the residency and I said

33:10

no and the guy finally came back and

33:12

said, you know It was the rethink this year. I said no

33:14

I don't want it And

33:17

then my guy says I think we should do it. I'm

33:19

like, well, I'll give it like a year I'll give a

33:21

year and then I'll try it. Yeah, I hated it. Yeah

33:24

Like despised it and like

33:26

I'm definitely not signing up again So it was the

33:28

years over and then all sudden I found a little

33:30

click and it was like

33:32

kind of getting good and

33:35

then I said, yeah, let's sign

33:37

again and Now

33:39

it's like of course I did we just signed again

33:41

for six years. So now it's you know, it's it

33:43

now it's a please Let me sign again. Yeah, I

33:45

think you know, I don't want to go back on

33:47

the road. Yeah. Well, yeah I

33:49

definitely cannot hold a candle to the amount of bus towards you

33:51

have done but They were fun and but

33:54

you know So you putting your life in danger to every night.

33:56

When you get you know, you don't even think about it You

33:58

know, you're on a tour bus. That on.

34:00

The. Mountain? Yes No. And you're letting some

34:03

guy you barely know drive you around and

34:05

will hurt me. Did we a bus drivers?

34:07

Don't? I don't have a neon rest. The

34:09

guys are all sleep is unknown when it's

34:11

you. I. Just as

34:13

shows always overlying lounge only the different

34:16

lines with while the drywall as bad

34:18

as everyday basis that every night and

34:20

with James over Yeah woman at my

34:23

little crown the rocks Yeah yes. But.

34:26

Not not any rule as we get too

34:28

crazy as those are you know those gonna

34:30

have a drink but that's but that that

34:32

yen on the unless someone put some the

34:34

in my during this am. I

34:36

disturb scam a drink and I said the

34:38

medicine like country music in does whatever and

34:41

drive down the road. Yeah and now I'm

34:43

talking to the driver. He says you know.

34:46

As he drove everybody right So he said

34:48

you know nice drug Johnny Cash I said

34:50

oh my God had to give my Johnny

34:53

cast it Fucking Fss Rock! I'm driving driving

34:55

Carrot Top image of Zoc and Johnny Unitas

34:57

best Am sorry about this. I'm sorry that

34:59

your career ending and he said no this

35:01

is Gray did you the best You like

35:04

some advice but I was Draven Johnny We

35:06

do rails off the fucking stairwell and ups

35:08

and am literally like listening to me say

35:10

this were driving I'm Mike How many years

35:13

ago that is a oh God years as

35:15

it won't be. You know any more like

35:17

you know these that no no no like

35:19

you don't do lines any more of this

35:22

hug from the Oh Yes magazine That is

35:24

So I I good some eyeglasses delivered zigzag

35:26

from minute intervals. Ssssss Exeter that you're not.

35:28

It was a drug as as Gaia Fff

35:30

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36:42

their of. Their. An interesting

36:44

read: Yes, Aiken and everyone of that.

36:47

I had their they know they can

36:49

they can see that movie. Awesome powers

36:51

when he does the the same with

36:53

La. Heart yearns around that away. My.

36:56

Bus driver any of my bus drivers kids can

36:58

do that in a tour bus is one can.

37:00

We were locked in he said hold on Zagat.

37:03

And he he did that. That. Same that

37:05

he did not and hours in a bar

37:07

and I'm grover like to cite yeah and

37:09

why somebody to do that either I will

37:12

act up associate s and began it's a

37:14

does the line up the studio and get

37:16

as I get the of the employees i

37:18

don't look that way I see a now

37:20

give me a second like the other. Here

37:23

they always have really crazy story like that

37:25

Leon yeah well as drivers use like I

37:28

guess he drove Pantera around for almost their

37:30

entire career house there I'm so yeah so

37:32

then you take the run in there is

37:34

a very good as their of their band

37:36

know yeah I mean they're like party been

37:39

yes he only paul of he of us

37:41

that he he didn't get too into the

37:43

details was yeah he definitely alluded to they

37:45

have any kinda my show lot of times

37:47

he was big fan. I was going to

37:49

say when now that are like so you're

37:52

in vegas you sign. Up. Now. suddenly

37:54

everyone wants to be there i have

37:56

to imagine you've met some very like

37:58

impress supposed crazy here It's funny to

38:00

you fun for me like I people say you know

38:03

been in show business whatever you call it I think

38:05

I'm in show business. You're definitely a show. I would

38:07

say I'm in some I'm close to it If I'm

38:09

not in it, you're definitely in it You

38:12

get to meet people. That's probably the coolest thing. You

38:15

know you're backstage, and you're talking

38:17

to sting, and you're you know yeah

38:19

You're you're having a need just the

38:21

Queen yeah You know that was

38:23

probably the one of the pinch me moments with

38:25

it was would you ever? Like

38:29

do you have any rules like if someone like that is

38:31

in the crowd do you want to know or do you

38:33

just let it? That's funny you ask I used to I

38:35

used to not want to know okay And

38:37

and then I now and I want to

38:39

know because I don't get as nervous and worked up

38:41

about it as I used to Right so I would

38:43

say I like we had You

38:45

know when the sting came and shite claims

38:47

in the thing I said they

38:49

told me you know I said Thank you because I wanted

38:51

a one I wanted to kind of

38:53

miss what because I might have

38:55

a bit Yeah, so usually if

38:58

someone comes they're in the show regardless and

39:00

until they know it And

39:02

they usually are happy with it But you know

39:04

I twames in I and I did this bit before she

39:07

I'd ever met her and there's a

39:09

it's a whole It's all these songs. She sings

39:11

and I said every song is like a cheerleader

39:13

and you play there's like five six songs you

39:15

play it Don't don't don't don't don't don't let's

39:17

go girls and then the next song is it's

39:19

all all right Let's go, so it's

39:22

so funny in the show So I said I'm sitting in

39:24

my crew's like you know what he ended up the shine.

39:26

I think she's there I'm like fucking doing it. Don't you

39:28

mean what are you gonna do? Yeah? That's why we do

39:31

this yeah, so she's sitting right there, and I do

39:33

it all she just and the first line out is

39:35

a shine I 25 I'd hit that again and so

39:39

I hit this like kind of weird laugh from the crowd and then

39:42

And then her husband's kind of like after show that

39:44

she comes back, and she's like you hit that again

39:47

And I said yeah Hit

39:50

it again. I did yeah, and friends like you

39:52

can hit it again. I said yeah, so she

39:55

we became With that big

39:57

friends because I you know because I made fun of

39:59

the show and she just, I didn't call

40:01

her out either. I didn't tell her anybody she

40:03

was there. I just did the bit, not told

40:05

her, because she said, you could have said it.

40:07

I said, no one to let you enjoy your

40:09

night. But then it comes, we had Tony Orlando

40:12

last night. And he does

40:14

the tie yellow ribbon around the old. So,

40:16

you know, the whole, when I go into the audience to

40:18

do a little crowd work, I go through and I'm like,

40:20

what the fuck, Tony Orlando's here. And I play the song

40:23

and we have a little piece of yellow ribbon and I

40:25

fuck with the, I

40:27

fuck with the crowd.

40:30

So it becomes part of the whole show. So

40:32

you embrace it now. Queen was probably the coolest though,

40:34

because Queen came back there and they were

40:36

just like, you know, fuck, it's Queen,

40:38

right? Yeah. I was a little nervous, I

40:40

was not gonna lie, I was a little nervous. And

40:43

I have some Queen in my shows, a lot of Queen

40:45

songs, there's even a clip of one phrase, he says, fuck

40:47

you, to the crowd. I do this whole

40:50

show and then afterwards, you know, they come back and

40:52

I'm like, oh my God, Queen's in my dressing room.

40:55

And the

40:57

drummer Roger says, Scott, that was just, God

41:00

damn, that was funny, right? I

41:02

said, oh, thanks, Jesus, no, no, no, no, how do you

41:04

fucking do that? He says, great. And

41:06

Brian May stand there and he's like, they both just

41:08

are like in awe, right? And it was very sweet

41:10

of them though, they were just like, they wouldn't stop

41:13

talking. And Brian is really, he knew

41:15

like every little, he said, and that thing, the part that

41:17

you did with the thing, the video came in, how did

41:19

that, how did you do that? And I'm

41:21

like, wow. And they go to leave and

41:23

he says, I

41:26

hate to do this to you, but is it okay if

41:28

I come back tomorrow? Wow. And I

41:30

said to my show, I said, you

41:33

don't have to come back to my show anymore. He was

41:35

going to, my son is flying in tonight and if it's

41:37

okay, I wanna bring him back, I

41:39

wanna bring him tomorrow. And I thought, absolutely,

41:42

but I mean, you know, are you sure you

41:44

wanna do that? Yeah. And he

41:47

said to my assistant on the

41:49

way out, he says, We'll

41:51

get y'all hooked up. And I Overheard him say, I guess

41:53

I gotta come back and make sure this wasn't for, this

41:55

was for real. Wow. He Didn't believe it. I mean, the

41:58

show was so good and so tight. He's like. See

42:00

this again. wow then he could then he told

42:02

me the next day's as yeah I actually wanted

42:04

to see exec and i didn't believe it was

42:07

a really this yeah I'm used to good so

42:09

like okay then he came back since spoken bloody

42:11

mais year. But. He added

42:13

a good no one little you know I had

42:15

of one little one like trump thing one thing like

42:17

in does he knew exactly they go The trump thing

42:20

was new some. Just.

42:22

To that you didn't and will this affect. Society

42:26

also be like is Hillary did. to do

42:28

to do to trump is gotta lean up.

42:31

Like that right is be

42:33

mad sis. My is madness.

42:35

This and most things scout.

42:38

Know you hate me right? Yeah and it is

42:40

Does decide to say a thing as I guess

42:43

they don't have carved. No one had car bidding.

42:45

I made carpeting a good and make them. did

42:47

it ever carpet. There is never chairs. Before I

42:49

was president was only person would tables. Dylan had

42:52

tables. remember they did news today but there's no

42:54

glasses. And you like know

42:56

their newest but no no one said no and set.

43:00

Up Up Up Up Up Up Up Up Up.

43:02

I did it off as. You're

43:05

not the first. What? you hadn't first,

43:07

why. And I am the greatest. Ever is

43:09

he seen care? Top deck is better than

43:11

as d Always talk like this because I

43:13

feel I know it seems like a mean

43:15

came over here for yeah like I have

43:17

a cat a big to serve again picture

43:19

of your luggage or started out that way

43:21

to as erase it assorted grown as is

43:24

leavers dissenters longer like is it was a

43:26

zoom as a guy didn't know he he

43:28

he honed in on his performance is the

43:30

answer Will people were young age gonna make

43:32

caricature of himself he'll probably I think probably

43:34

will as the i don't go back to

43:36

look at my clubs and me do I

43:38

probably. Have

43:40

evolved that well. We won't go

43:42

back. A good change. The magazines

43:45

idealism that fingernails on a chalk

43:47

more listening to myself and know

43:49

not everybody And in I'm on

43:51

Arsenio Hall's show Him. As

43:54

a tablet. nothing on it in. As.

43:56

He gets. You know, I think the coolest

43:58

thing that. I guess

44:00

that I hear just in the forty minutes.

44:03

who is taught So far as. It

44:05

doesn't seem like. At. Any.

44:08

Level. Of career like. Anyone

44:10

ever feels like. I'm.

44:13

Or. Yeah I'm on set as insert a

44:15

like you always still have a party or

44:17

brain it's like is as good. And

44:19

do people like this? I think that's

44:21

probably the kiss of death for every

44:24

every every artist I think Cs and.

44:26

Because. You never know what's the next. The Lg

44:28

can't live off the next. The for the last

44:30

thing you did is that it's like the shows.

44:32

it's like you know this the other night we

44:35

had a week on the road show so ago

44:37

and it was the means is erode. shows are

44:39

using. Really route rowdy

44:41

and loud. and Sundays view like a

44:43

rock star. Yeah, and Vegas shows can

44:45

be but you can also be, you

44:47

know, They. Could is

44:50

be a show for the lot of tourists

44:52

a right there's been some amazing says bed

44:54

that amazingness am shows wouldn't as a real

44:56

but the other night we had our own

44:58

two three and a road that we just

45:00

we can massive second Raymond said of was

45:03

us and we need roadshow yeah they make

45:05

him oven for the ambitious with Did Rojo

45:07

I said i need can't predict down why

45:09

does happens it is The crowd was just.

45:12

Over a year electric and that which makes you'd

45:14

dance or more years we're like is is a

45:17

dance that you get up there with. When you're

45:19

good, near good it is. It's like. It's

45:22

golden. Yeah, every comic know that any in

45:24

any profession. Actually you sound you get an

45:26

erroneous on girls. Yeah damn. I'm selling Ten

45:28

Guards League that has had a rhythm. Yeah

45:31

so it was runs in jail and comedy

45:33

book. but it's But when you get those

45:35

moments and then insert southeast of the gun

45:37

at him, I'm I'm really. I. I think

45:40

I finally got some really good. I feel

45:42

like that dance his word escapes people when

45:44

they watch Stand Up. And. I.

45:47

Feel that. Tells. You all

45:49

the others feel on or Rcp will

45:51

say online like alec stand up around

45:53

on Canada thing stance kind of this

45:55

and I think. People. Especially

45:58

young people. Now they cause see standup. The.

46:00

Weird. Way worse. As like. Being. A

46:02

little clips of crowd work and they are. Why do

46:04

people like this and I feel like people they don't

46:07

know and people tell me that by the whale time

46:09

am a comic, the measure hates them with them. Yeah,

46:12

I. Always find that funny but them and I

46:14

my oh geez hims of you don't like

46:16

the I do i hate what you do

46:18

and I go like what need me personally

46:20

or just noticed com and in general is

46:22

mike of the day or deathly know come

46:24

to my show here here here but you

46:26

have evolved on like a can or the

46:28

or you know that be does brilliancy of

46:30

a know incomes it means as they will

46:32

like me but what they'll say is. I.

46:35

Never. Liked. You. But.

46:37

Now I love you like thousand. Seriously

46:40

they they do I guess not as many times

46:42

now these but I a lot of your life

46:44

you the just they just didn't know they did

46:46

doubted that they just use a carrot top B

46:49

C meets the image the name in law they

46:51

go know yes and then they come the show

46:53

or they meet you know like oh my god

46:55

this is really this is like know I know

46:57

nothing that I thought it would be like wasn't

47:00

what he does a good the they go nothing

47:02

like this year that the shell is. Move.

47:04

A different than what anything. Bravo that

47:06

you have a course. it's it's. Macys

47:09

sit the shown Vegas, his family. Seventy

47:12

percent stand up. Yes, And

47:14

most people think that it's one hundred

47:16

percent or up. Yes! So it started

47:19

out in the beginning it was all

47:21

props and a little bit of sand

47:23

them but now it's I tell stories

47:25

from my half hour ride on Pick

47:27

Up. One thing clear the whole story

47:29

but my father work at Nasa he

47:31

goes on for about thirty minutes. Yes,

47:33

Devolution of Comedy Remote and George Carlin

47:35

In and Gallagher Emily's People That is

47:37

a backshall story That and people even

47:39

let us know your as the early

47:41

last night in the Came Back say

47:43

said I love all the Dead storytelling.

47:45

yeah and it is kind of evolved into

47:47

that because i've been doing this for so

47:49

long i finally got i got comfortable finally

47:51

does telling a story yes i was also

47:53

nervous as tell a story gives you one

47:56

that the last every second course so now

47:58

it's fun to do like and eight-minute

48:00

story and then get a big laugh, but you

48:02

got to wait eight minutes for it. Yeah. So

48:05

you're like, fucking better get, I better, I better not

48:07

mess this up because they're waiting for this big thing.

48:09

Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.

48:12

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Terms apply. In the beginning when people

49:48

kind of hit you with this like, ah, I

49:50

thought you were this, but it was amazing. Did

49:53

you appreciate that honesty or would it mess

49:56

with you a little bit? Well, it always messed with me.

49:59

I told Albert Brooks one time and

50:01

and his genius he

50:04

was on the Tonight Show and he

50:07

came out and he said he did something with some like

50:10

something on the desk it was like a little trick

50:13

or did something and Carson laughed and

50:16

he says thank God that's not your whole act because

50:19

something happened at the guard and

50:22

now what Brooks says to Johnny Carson he

50:24

says God just imagine imagine booking Caratop and

50:28

American Airlines loses his luggage he

50:30

hasn't he doesn't have shit right

50:33

so I'm watching this on and

50:35

I remember exactly where I was I was on a tour we

50:37

just did doing this big like arena yeah

50:39

at a college and he just killed and we were

50:42

watching it on TV on the bus and I

50:44

was like what the fuck and I was so mad

50:46

I was

50:49

so mad because what he

50:51

said was true yeah so

50:54

I'm like if the

50:56

Rolling Stones luggage was lost they wouldn't have a

50:58

fucking act yeah of course so it made

51:00

no sense that he's ripping on me even

51:02

Caratop lost his luggage he was fucked well

51:04

so if the Rolling Stones or Nirvana or

51:07

anyone else yeah anybody if the

51:10

airlines loses your shit you're probably fucked too but

51:12

he just singled me out so like

51:15

that that was bullshit so then

51:17

I get to meet him at Gary

51:19

Shandling's funeral and all places there he is

51:21

and I walked up to him I said

51:24

I got a beef with you and you know Al Brooks is

51:26

like oh my god I got to get a video of this

51:28

Caratop has a beef with me I can't

51:31

wait to hear and I said no it's just you you

51:33

I said I tell him the story he goes oh my

51:35

god I am the I am the worst

51:37

person in the plan I did do that I did say that and

51:40

you are correct and I said I know I'm correct that's

51:42

what I'm telling you like everyone could you know if you

51:44

lost your luggage you wouldn't have anything and he says I'm

51:46

sorry can I can we hug it out and he hate

51:48

me he says I'm saying you know

51:50

we're best friends yeah he says how well did

51:53

you know Gary I said

51:55

you know well enough that I got invited he

51:57

says yeah He

52:00

didn't like people very much and I said no he didn't. He

52:02

says, is it kind of shocking that so many people here,

52:04

he would hate this. I said he's

52:07

funny again but

52:09

I just had to set that straight with him. I'm

52:11

like yeah, you know, of course, why

52:13

pick on me? You took

52:16

the words out of my mouth because I was going to ask if you

52:18

ever had like an awkward run in

52:21

hashing it out with someone. Oh, I had a couple. You

52:23

know, that one was, yeah, that one

52:25

it was just, there's been a comment too that

52:30

people said that don't know the

52:32

truth of it. Like

52:35

when our buddy,

52:37

a very, very funny comedian

52:39

passed away, does

52:43

the clip of me and chairman of the board, he was on Conan.

52:46

Norm McDonald, thank you. And Norm

52:49

and I were great friends. And I know when I say great

52:51

friends, I said we were friends. We weren't great. I

52:53

said we weren't best of friends but we were great

52:55

friends. Like if I ever see him or saw him,

52:57

we always say, Gary, and Tom, and you say hi

53:00

but we didn't hang out. We did have

53:02

coffee once in a while actually. He

53:06

said, he said on Conan O'Brien one night and

53:08

it's such a famous clip because he sets him

53:10

up for it and he's picking on the poor

53:12

Courtney Thorne Smith who's on the movie. And it

53:15

was a good movie, chairman of the board. He's

53:19

like, God, he's going on and on about

53:21

it. So you quit friends

53:23

or what is it, Melrose Place? You

53:25

quit Melrose Place to go into movies

53:28

with Carrot Top? She goes, no, it was one

53:30

movie. And he's the nicest guy in the world

53:33

and he's actually a great actor. He's like, no,

53:35

but go back to this. So why would you

53:37

go do a movie with Carrot Top? She

53:42

kept trying to defend me. She's like, it was great fun.

53:44

It was a great movie. And he's a sweet guy. And

53:49

then he's just like, I just don't get it. And he wouldn't

53:51

let it go. And then Norma Donaldson,

53:53

he says, what was the name of the movie again?

53:56

And she says chairman of the board. And he

53:58

goes, oh, like B-O-R-E-D? Yeah. Conan

54:00

is losing his mind laughing and again. I'm

54:02

thinking bitch. We did that on the set. Yeah,

54:04

that's like We did when we were making

54:07

the movie we called it chairman of the board. Yeah

54:09

Yeah, but he thought that was the most today ever

54:11

I go people say oh my god Were you in

54:13

norm enemies cuz he really ripped

54:15

on you? I'm like no we weren't one more

54:17

comics and who's fucking joke Yeah, and it was

54:19

funny. We thought it was funny enough that we

54:21

wrote it, too Yeah So I've

54:24

only had a couple riffs with and it's

54:26

usually things that like like that one reason

54:28

people heard of heard Not the

54:31

source. Yeah, I had another comic one time that I

54:33

opened firm at a College

54:37

and they wanted me to do 20

54:40

minutes and this is at the time my career

54:42

where I had about eight minutes.

54:44

Yeah So I said and I'm

54:46

not kidding. I said I got I got about eight and

54:48

eight minutes I said about seven's good, but I can stretch

54:50

it to eight But you know don't know you're gonna be

54:52

honest with you and they said okay They were fine with

54:54

it because they didn't need to have that much time Right,

54:57

I said do even if you just do five I said five I

54:59

can do I can nail five so

55:01

I Get up there and

55:03

I'm I'm I do two Proper

55:06

maybe three do my crime watch thing. I opened

55:09

but the crime watched and that I was killed

55:12

And then I go grab this car It was like a car

55:15

that was in the shape of a ramp So

55:17

if you had a head on collision you jump it, right?

55:20

And and and I and everyone killed and I

55:23

put it in there This is thirty years ago.

55:25

I put it down and then I might I

55:27

look over the guys going like, you know wrap it up And

55:31

I'm thinking I'm like like wrap it

55:33

up like clothes because I only had done less than

55:35

a minute Yeah, and he's like no

55:37

no like rap so I I you fuck so I

55:39

I go to my closer Which

55:42

was this paper cups and string

55:44

phone? Yeah, and

55:46

it was a you know, hello, what's going

55:48

on? You fit, you know the cups and string phone. I

55:50

said I made it I made a new one for today's

55:52

kids that had a call waiting in it So I say

55:54

hold on have another call. Hello, and another cup would come

55:56

out and then I'd have three

55:59

cups and coffee calling and I had

56:01

a clear cut for caller ID and I can see you

56:03

but that was my big closure

56:05

and it killed and

56:07

so that's when George Carlin country and

56:09

said that's funny shit right there so

56:12

I do I do I do that

56:14

and then the comedian comes out and

56:16

he whispers leave your shit because

56:19

I was gonna move it because I didn't want him to stand it

56:21

was you know he's leave your shit

56:23

so I'm alright so I go into

56:25

the arena and I watched the whole the whole

56:27

set and he wasn't doing well and he

56:29

was just he was in a bad mood and he

56:32

kept he kept kind of looking

56:34

down at my props and

56:37

kind of kind of wanting to move them and scoot him

56:39

and fuck with him he's kind of just doing with his

56:41

foot like fuck and finally he picks

56:43

up this car and that had the ramp on

56:45

it and

56:47

he holds it up like no one's

56:49

laughing just holds it up and looks at the audience

56:52

like yeah this I came

56:56

all the way down like for this and I

56:58

he he one

57:00

makes that fun of it which is where could the killed

57:03

yeah and then he's like threw it down he didn't like

57:05

lay it down he can't do it down and the crowd

57:07

was like whoo they really

57:09

love me yeah young I was probably 19

57:11

yeah and I just done

57:13

three jokes and then he

57:15

went to paper cups and string and that was really

57:18

killer and he kind of went I

57:21

don't get it babe or ever and then the next

57:23

thing I know they

57:26

start to boo him like like oh

57:28

and he was like yeah because he's kicking my

57:30

props in the crowd like no

57:33

no no no the topper he

57:35

gonna be the topper is fine the topper

57:38

so I I come off and

57:40

I'm like well I was the pro so I came off

57:42

to say hi he wouldn't say hi he left and

57:45

about ten years goodbye of him ripping on me

57:47

in every show every show and

57:49

finally I'm here in LA and and and

57:52

I was staying at this hotel in the

57:54

elevator doors open and off

57:56

walk and I is this guy no

57:58

and I said Oh my god,

58:01

hey. And he was like, hey

58:03

Topper. And I said, no, we have to have a

58:05

talk. And he's like,

58:07

we do? No, this will be good. I said, no,

58:09

really. If you have just five minutes of your time,

58:11

I need to talk to you. And he's like, you

58:14

got about five. Okay, Topper, what is it? I said,

58:16

I want to set the record straight. What

58:18

happened? He says, I'll tell you before you tell me.

58:21

We were at University of Georgia. I said, nope. We

58:23

were at Wake Forest. So

58:25

you're already wrong. It was Wake Forest University. He

58:27

says, all right. Now what happened?

58:29

You went up and did 30 minutes. I said, there

58:31

you go. I did not. I did three props because

58:33

I didn't even have 30 minutes. I did three props.

58:36

I was supposed to do 20, 18 or something like

58:38

that, but I did three. And

58:41

he says, nope, you went long

58:43

and the guy that booked, he was so

58:45

mad. I said, no, that's not what happened. I

58:48

wasn't capable of going long. And

58:50

I wouldn't do that to you. I'm scared to death

58:52

to have the gig. I wouldn't have gone over my

58:54

time. I was scared even I could get to the

58:56

time. And then

58:59

you started kicking everything. He says, I

59:02

didn't kick it. He remembered, I didn't kick it,

59:04

babe. I said, whatever you did, you

59:06

made it bad for everybody. So

59:09

you owe me an apology. And

59:12

he said, I think

59:14

he said, let me think on it, babe. Okay.

59:18

And I sort of got it. And then I left

59:20

and I was like, really? Okay. And

59:23

it was David Spade one day and David

59:25

Spade knows this person real well. And he

59:27

comes walking in the corner and he says,

59:29

hey, I said, how do you know David?

59:32

I said, well, David and I

59:34

are friends. I said, David and I, you and I

59:36

should be friends too. And I said, David, he's not

59:38

my friend because he thinks that I went too long

59:40

at a, he got the college wrong and

59:42

the amount of time wrong that I did. And

59:45

he thinks like that. And David says, like, Carrot

59:48

Top doesn't have five minutes. How could you think

59:50

he would have, and he didn't know me. He

59:52

just said, Carrot Top doesn't have five minutes. And

59:54

I said, right. Not even now

59:56

do I have five minutes. So finally

59:58

it was like a trampoline. I think he said

1:00:01

all right truce and then I end up going

1:00:03

to a basketball game NBA basketball

1:00:05

all-star game in Vegas and they

1:00:08

put me in these seats and and I

1:00:10

had the like the best seats in them

1:00:13

in the arena I'm

1:00:15

a little ESPN people were behind me. I kept oh

1:00:17

god is like it's like It's

1:00:19

like ESPN guys. I go sorry

1:00:21

I got and then who comes

1:00:24

in sits right behind me my

1:00:26

friend and I said I I

1:00:29

Said this sucks, huh? And he said

1:00:32

he said it's okay, babe I said, you know I gotta

1:00:35

be I gotta I gotta know is it is it

1:00:37

that I'm sitting in front of you make you more

1:00:39

angry or my hair you can't see behind around it

1:00:41

and He

1:00:43

said no, it's that my son is your

1:00:45

biggest fan. Would you mind taking a picture with

1:00:47

him? And I said your son

1:00:50

is and he goes yeah, I said oh my god

1:00:53

Now that gotta be the worst part right? Let's just

1:00:55

take the picture I

1:00:57

gotta make your blood boy that your son loves me.

1:01:00

He says my son loves Carrot Tom So

1:01:02

I said, okay now I think my arm around him. I said,

1:01:04

you know, your dad hated me for years And

1:01:08

he think if this son is you know, funny, he's my

1:01:10

dad hates everybody That

1:01:13

hates me too. Don't you know get over it? But

1:01:16

we finally made up well, yeah, but it

1:01:18

was one of those things misunderstandings, you know

1:01:20

carrot I agree Psyche

1:01:22

is not here. This is the end of the

1:01:24

main episode if you want the

1:01:26

full bonus full extended episode You can get

1:01:29

that now team G studios TV Yeah,

1:01:32

no ads What

1:01:35

else can I tell you and you'll get 90 minutes

1:01:37

of me and me and big CT

1:01:39

big caretop big Thank you to caretop

1:01:41

big up carrot top big up team

1:01:43

G studios TV Thanks

1:01:46

for listening. We'll see you soon I've

1:01:51

never told oh, that's great. That's all I

1:01:53

mean ever Because

1:01:58

running always just He

1:02:00

says, he's got me fucking fired. It's just

1:02:02

a carrot. It's a single carrot. To

1:02:05

watch this extended cut and more,

1:02:07

sign up at tmgstudios.tv.

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