0:01

Welcome to This Is Important,

0:04

a production of iHeart Radio, the

0:06

show where we talk about what's obviously

0:08

both critically crucially important

0:12

today on This Is.

0:13

Important, standing

0:15

up side of the bed t shirt on no

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pants, fully engorged, shouting.

0:21

For some reason, when I'm hungover, I

0:23

always feel the need to seed.

0:26

I jerked off into TJ Maxwe's let's

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go. Hey,

0:38

he hey, we pay.

0:42

Let's go.

0:44

Do you feel that?

0:46

Oh shit?

0:50

All right, that's fifteen seconds?

0:52

Is that?

0:53

Oh?

0:54

Yeah?

0:54

Dude? Yeah, posa

0:57

dude that gets white people going in,

1:00

like Midwestern suburban

1:04

whites. Whoo the

1:06

whites? He are fired up?

1:08

Did they play that at sports stadiums

1:11

and stuff?

1:12

That feels like a sports anthem?

1:13

Have you? But have you? It feels like it. That's I'm saying, but

1:15

have you? Do we hear this?

1:17

I haven't heard it?

1:19

Why don't we? That's crazy?

1:20

If you told me that the guy from Disturbed

1:23

actually did like lock children in

1:25

his basement or something. I don't know, but

1:28

there has to be a reason we don't hear that at

1:31

stadiums.

1:32

Go ahead, Adam, I'm the lead singer.

1:34

Definitely they passed away. I

1:36

think the lead singer is dead.

1:38

Oh really what was he a good guy? Or did he lock

1:40

kids in the basement? I mean he's a lead singer

1:43

of a band called Disturbed.

1:44

Go ahead at him. Yeah, I feel like it was disturbed

1:47

in a way.

1:47

I feel like, you know, there's a lot of things

1:49

there.

1:50

What if he was really well adjusted, well, then.

1:52

I feel like you we would be hearing that at

1:54

every stadium.

1:55

Disturb was talking about like the

1:58

planet, not himself.

2:00

The lead singer of Disturbed is still live,

2:02

says Todd.

2:02

Wait then who died?

2:04

Oh I know who died? Lincoln Park?

2:06

Oh there it is, no, I know

2:08

Lincoln Park. And also it was called like

2:11

drowning pool, right there was.

2:13

There was a band and that ship

2:15

was pretty fire too. I got to look that up. I'll play

2:17

the fort fifteen seconds of

2:19

it, all.

2:20

Right, Adam, how you doing?

2:21

I'm checking out. He doesn't

2:24

seem that disturbed. He seems just like a guy that

2:26

has in a band, which which is a

2:28

little disappointing because if you name your

2:30

band disturbed, you gotta do some disturbing

2:33

shit.

2:33

For sure.

2:34

You want him to walk the walk.

2:35

Yeah, yeah, you gotta walk the walk.

2:37

But I'm also like, well, why don't we hear

2:39

that song at every stadium. Then I

2:42

want when when my LA Clippers,

2:45

when Kawhi Leonard, oh my god, dunks

2:47

dunks on a fool for it to go. Yeah,

2:51

oh my god.

2:52

These are so good. You know, we don't

2:54

really deep dive sports. And also

2:57

this is two weeks out, so who knows. They

2:59

might not be for plays right now.

3:01

Anybody who cares anything about basketball,

3:04

this might be the Clippers year.

3:07

That's what they're all saying. And guess what,

3:09

I don't like it. I don't.

3:11

I don't like with that because you you

3:13

are a you are a cursed franchise.

3:15

We do know that we are.

3:17

We we certainly aren't.

3:19

But this feels beyond the curse.

3:21

You know, if it feels good. But if

3:23

the first game of the playoffs, uh,

3:26

the entire team's knees explode,

3:30

that would make perfect sense.

3:32

They're like jump ball. What just happened

3:34

there?

3:35

They all all to.

3:36

The ground, their knees exploded.

3:38

There's some seaport.

3:40

Yeah, that would that would make a lot of sense.

3:42

What's the furthest they've gone?

3:44

In the Western Western Conference

3:46

Finals? Was the furthest they've gone they've

3:48

gone? That was just a couple of years ago, which.

3:50

To people who don't watch sports, that's

3:53

right before the finals, which

3:55

is where you win it all.

3:56

Whould they play Phoenix? Phoenix,

3:59

Phoenix?

3:59

I think it who Phoenix?

4:02

Yeah? I love it. Well, good

4:04

luck with that or will you? Will you go to some playoff

4:06

games if that happens?

4:08

Yeah, I mean we're the baby

4:11

by this podcast. The baby is I think thirteen

4:13

years old.

4:14

So dude, yeah, my kid

4:17

is gonna be out.

4:18

Yeah. So I'm celebrated. Man, thirteenth,

4:21

thirteenth birthday?

4:22

What's to man?

4:24

Just jerking off a lot? Yeah?

4:26

Yeah, okay, keep catching him. He

4:30

can't. He can't stop it.

4:32

He's hey, your boy is disturbed.

4:34

He is just now that's disturbed.

4:37

My god. I keep walking.

4:38

Into he's fucking beating off

4:40

into a tube sock. Yeah.

4:42

Every every time I every time I see him

4:44

jerking off into a Kleenex

4:46

or a tube sock, I go, what

4:52

are you doing?

4:55

I go, oh, man, that is

4:57

wild.

4:58

Dude, You're gonna have a boy boys or way

5:01

way crazy. That's gonna be fun

5:03

for you.

5:04

I don't know what are you basing that on? Black? Yeah?

5:06

What are you in the.

5:06

Fact that I have girls and they're very well behaved,

5:08

but boys are psychos.

5:11

I'm basing on myself. I jerked off everywhere.

5:14

It was amazing. Yeah, that's not psycho, that's

5:16

just passing the time.

5:17

Yeah it's yeah, it's just jerking off. And

5:19

by the way, I feel like I wouldn't even be my

5:22

dad. Every time I was in the bathroom

5:25

taking a shit, it's

5:27

like it's important. Absolutely

5:29

every time I was in there going to the bathroom,

5:32

he would go, uh, quit jerking

5:34

it. You're gonna go blind through

5:37

the bathroom door. And what's funny

5:39

is probably eighty five percent of

5:41

the time he.

5:42

Was right, right, it's the only way you could climbax.

5:45

I'm not jerking off, Like stop, I'm

5:47

not, But also I am.

5:49

I do. Like how like you go into the

5:51

bathroom just to take a shit and he's

5:53

like, don't jerk off in there.

5:54

You're like, I'm not.

5:55

And then you're like, I'm thinking a bad

5:58

idea. Not a bad idea.

6:00

Were you sitting down to ship and jerking

6:02

off in sitting position? Because that's fucking

6:05

disturbed.

6:07

Yeah, what do you mean I jerk off in

6:09

sitting positions? Wait, I

6:12

still do.

6:14

Blake can only do it bending over

6:16

looking backwards into him.

6:18

You what

6:21

what do you what do you mean, Blake?

6:23

I don't I honestly, we

6:25

got a stand there. I probably

6:28

could count on my hands.

6:31

Wait, what is the same.

6:33

I could probably count the number of times on my

6:35

hands how many times I've I've jerked off like

6:37

in sitting position, like sitting

6:40

straight up?

6:41

What are you talking about?

6:42

So this is we're finding What I love about

6:44

the podcast is we just find out these

6:46

little bit crazy

6:49

If you ever, if you ever want to find

6:51

out the most intimate details

6:53

of your best friends lives,

6:56

uh, I start a podcast and do about one

6:58

hundred and ninety episodes.

7:00

Yeah, yeah, you start to scrape the

7:02

bottom of the bar.

7:03

Then you really start to find out.

7:05

You find out that I started stand up while

7:08

wiping, and that was I mean, my god, we

7:10

got a we got a lot of mileage out.

7:12

Of that was early.

7:13

That was got a whole lot of mileage

7:15

out of that.

7:16

That's one of the pillars of this podcast.

7:18

But this, but this, it actually

7:20

disturbs me.

7:21

You seem.

7:26

I gotta get disturbed,

7:29

be ready, because.

7:32

Never sitting down? What Yeah,

7:35

by the way, the saying is I can count on one hand,

7:37

but like.

7:38

Yeah, hand

7:40

on my hand. I got on my.

7:42

Hand and you can only

7:45

count with one hand.

7:45

If I never jo

7:48

in.

7:48

The sitting position is seated position.

7:50

What did you do before like laptops

7:53

and you were in front of a desktop computer

7:55

at like your parents' house.

7:56

Yeah, yep, correct.

7:58

Oh, so there were years I was sitting there?

8:00

Am I bad?

8:01

No?

8:02

H corrects?

8:04

No, I just you were standing,

8:07

was standing so you could like dart

8:09

out the.

8:09

I could see Blake being one of those weirdos who didn't

8:12

look at porn and would just like smell,

8:15

like he stole a girl's a girl's sweater

8:17

and he would just smell the sweater

8:20

and then just jerk off while standing

8:22

up looking in the mirror while he's wearing the sweater.

8:24

Something like that. What I could see you doing

8:27

something like that.

8:28

Very detailed, very detailed at him.

8:30

Hey, Blake, let's just say I

8:32

think you're a little disturbed.

8:37

No, no, no, no, But maybe

8:39

I do have an active memory. Maybe I don't

8:41

need like a visual companion because

8:44

in my mind I can summon things.

8:46

Okay, so I don't need to be seated at

8:48

that family computer to have a visual.

8:51

Well, sure you don't. You don't have to.

8:53

I'm not saying you have to. Of course, of

8:55

course, the like the spontaneity

8:58

hits us all at various times.

9:00

Sure, I jerked off into TJ. Maxwell's

9:02

Yeah, that's when it hit him.

9:04

Wait, that sounds like you're live.

9:08

That's a little disturbing, but like, okay,

9:11

so are you willing to accept that

9:13

you've blocked out probably years of sitting

9:15

down upright at a desktop computer.

9:19

Yeah, I guess I was more thinking in my adult

9:21

life, like I don't do it any longer

9:23

in a seated position, like if it's gonna

9:26

happen, I can't remember the last

9:28

time I j O.

9:29

What about all those drives up to the Bay.

9:31

That's a handful of least right there.

9:34

You're not jerking off in driving?

9:37

No, did you throw the Tony Braxton

9:39

on whoa hitting.

9:41

The grape vine? Uh? While cranking

9:43

down? No, well, grabbing your grape vine?

9:46

I think maybe?

9:47

Yes, the point point gosh,

9:49

you guys put me to work today, Yes,

9:52

your y grat I

9:55

don't think that.

9:56

No.

9:56

Maybe one time I've done it on the drive from LA

9:59

to the Bay. I don't really get.

10:00

Maybe Kyle was the guy that used to do it a lot.

10:02

Kyle too, I mean, my god, I

10:05

think he's just looking for in my

10:07

adult life. I don't think I ever

10:09

find myself joeing in this

10:11

seated position.

10:13

It just doesn't.

10:14

There's not really a lot of times when that

10:17

happened.

10:17

So, Blake, you're at a desk right

10:19

now.

10:19

Yes, should I go and I am Joe?

10:22

Yes, but I won't go to completion.

10:24

Pro There's never a time you have

10:26

a toddler in your hand.

10:27

This is why I don't like talking about my kids. Hey,

10:31

Blake, we got to prepare him for fatherhood.

10:33

Come on, be honest.

10:34

You're in your you

10:36

have like an ADU right, So it's

10:39

like as a mother in law.

10:41

Suites that you're in completely detached.

10:43

I completely detached. I could do whatever

10:45

I want A do you for a little JOI.

10:48

So you're kind of tucked away. It's up high

10:51

where you're at. I've been. It's like a lost so

10:53

no one's breaking in tucked

10:55

sure's there's not a time where you

10:57

just after the pod or whenever you haven't met

11:00

you're like, you know what I want to I'm gonna give

11:02

myself a sweet tree before

11:04

going and playing.

11:06

With my child and

11:08

seeing what's for dinner.

11:09

Yeah, before you start

11:11

to smell the hamburger

11:13

helper and uh and moseyon

11:16

back inside the house stovetops for dinner.

11:18

No, honestly, honestly, that

11:21

moment has not come for me.

11:23

Hey, yes, points Uh.

11:25

Well, dude, so that kind of leads me to

11:27

believe that maybe you don't jerk off,

11:30

uh that often at all?

11:33

What is I

11:35

guess what is often?

11:36

For?

11:37

If you guys want to share with what

11:40

what is often? What do you mean, like, how often

11:42

are you guys jerking off?

11:43

I think daily is a lot.

11:44

I think daily is a lot.

11:45

I think three times a week.

11:48

Daily's a lot for a for someone

11:50

in a relationship.

11:51

Daily's a lot for people that are our age,

11:53

that are in a long term, committed relationship.

11:56

I think daily would be. It's just so that's

11:58

a lot of doing, right.

11:59

I think three times a week you're putting in work.

12:02

Yeah, okay, you know you're you're putting up

12:04

numbers.

12:04

You're I'd say a couple times

12:06

a week. I'd say at least once, always,

12:09

once, most twice.

12:11

Oh yeah, there's no way I'm not There's

12:13

no way I'm not doing it.

12:14

If the clock is about to strike midnight on a

12:16

Sunday, I get it in. I excuse

12:18

myself from wherever I am, and I get it in.

12:20

I say, I'm going to the adu.

12:24

I spread to the nearest adua.

12:28

Yeah, well, I wonder that's really

12:31

interesting because as your

12:33

life goes on, supposedly

12:35

your masturbation times

12:38

are supposed to decrease.

12:39

I think that's what we were told, and I don't know

12:41

if it's true.

12:42

Yeah, you jerk off the most at

12:44

the very beginning in retirement.

12:46

It's going to be crazy. Yeah. Then

12:48

it ramps back up towards the end for sure.

12:51

Uh, because you're just killing time.

12:53

Yeah, waiting to die.

12:54

Yeah.

12:54

So what are your numbers like here, Blake, because

12:56

I feel like my numbers are it's that.

12:58

Three times a week, two times a week.

13:00

But then if I'm hungover, I'll jerk

13:02

off five times that day.

13:04

Dude, Adam, it's really weird you mentioned

13:07

that. For some reason, when I'm hungover,

13:10

I always feel the need to seed.

13:12

Yeah, you got to get the poison out points.

13:14

Yeah, what is that? What is that?

13:16

Science? Hit the button? You guys

13:19

are putting me to work.

13:20

I mentioned this to Chloe because she's

13:22

like, what is your deal? Why are you so

13:24

horny? When you're hungover.

13:26

It's can I come in?

13:27

No? Yes, Adam.

13:29

I love that you're saying, why are you so horny when

13:31

you're hungover?

13:32

Yeah? What is that?

13:33

Because obviously she's not.

13:35

She's like, if we, you know, we drink

13:37

together, we you know. She's like,

13:40

I don't why why are you touching me? Why are

13:42

you grinding up on me? And I'm like, well, now I have to jerk

13:44

off five times. If you don't, don't have to texted

13:46

me five times? Then I have to drink off five

13:48

times.

13:49

You know where I'm going to be. And I know I like that you.

13:51

I like that you say it in a normal tone when

13:53

in reality, I know you scream it. That

13:56

seems I know that it's that

13:59

Sandy. I'm standing standing

14:02

up side of the bed, t shirt on, no

14:04

pants, fully and gorged, shouting,

14:08

now I'm gonna jerk off five times.

14:10

I guess I had to jerk off five times.

14:13

I think maybe what

14:15

I have calculated in my mind

14:17

is that like I feel, I feel so bad

14:19

that I want to feel I want to feel good.

14:21

That's right, that's exactly yeah.

14:24

Yeah.

14:25

But also I'm hoping that

14:27

somehow the hangover comes out through

14:30

my penis and it's gone for the rest of the

14:32

time.

14:32

That's also what I'm Yeah, I think that's what everybody's

14:34

saying.

14:35

Interesting.

14:36

But but but hang on, so you don't

14:38

sit down? Where do you jerk off the

14:41

roof?

14:41

He's a true work aholic.

14:44

Yeah, dude, I go to Van Eys and I

14:47

go to the workhol house, I go to Hamlin

14:49

and I really I really put in work. No,

14:51

I feel like if I'm ever doing it, it's either laying

14:54

down or standing up, but never just seated

14:57

standing.

14:58

Okay, well this is a shower since you're okay.

15:02

Yeah, no, no, no, he hesitated,

15:05

Uh standing up? Yeah?

15:08

Are we in socks? This is dangerous.

15:10

First of all, the shower. The shower

15:12

sucks. The shower sucks. You're

15:15

not into it, No, of

15:17

course, ka sucks. Uh

15:20

we're And and the way you hesitated

15:22

when he said this is obviously a

15:25

shower situation, you were like, Uh,

15:27

that leads me to like you're just in a closet

15:29

somewhere in your home standing.

15:32

Yeah. This is You're carrying so much shame

15:34

and you don't have to.

15:35

You don't have to let it out on the pot, let

15:37

it out.

15:39

I don't I feel like these are the times

15:41

that I wish Kyle was here, because

15:43

he would say some ship where he actually

15:45

does something way up, more fucked up, and

15:47

I could allow you guys to go bury

15:50

him. But right now I feel like you guys are kind

15:52

of piling on me.

15:53

I'm not piling I'm actually trying to get

15:55

to the bottom of this because you're the one.

15:57

Who and I'm not sure I want

15:59

it to get to the bottom of I don't

16:01

know if I actually want to talk about this.

16:03

Oh yeah, that's fine, that's fine.

16:05

We can just you know what, I will say, Kyle

16:08

for sure has beat off outside

16:10

more than all of us combined. That's

16:12

what I think he's like, not

16:15

in a good way.

16:16

He'll go take a jerk off walk.

16:18

Yeah, yeah, yes, he will take his

16:20

shoes and socks off, bury

16:22

them in his garden, and then beat

16:24

off on his cucumbers for sure.

16:26

No, and then and then use his uh

16:29

dick shovel to dig them back up. And

16:32

that's how exactly.

16:33

That's how he plants his seat. He fucks the ground.

16:35

Yeah, he goes, uh, I'm I'm hunting

16:37

for some earthworms, honey, and

16:40

then he puts his worm

16:42

in the earth man.

16:43

I've seen so many worm I'm gonna start

16:45

doing that a lot.

16:46

By the way, you're

16:51

catchphrase, you're suddenly

16:53

just Wendy Williams.

16:59

When Williams is probably the best show of

17:01

all time. She is an entertainer,

17:05

she's the best.

17:06

Let me use my new cast raise.

17:09

I don't find her very fascinating.

17:11

She's so cool. I don't disagree she's

17:13

fascinating.

17:14

Well, I want the world to know that

17:16

Blake is choosing not to talk about

17:19

Yeah, we'll move how

17:21

he stands up and jerks

17:23

off, and it's not the shower, And that's a secret

17:26

that he's that he's willing

17:28

to let be a secret instead of just.

17:31

Are you on like a indoor

17:33

board? Is this like are you building

17:35

skill sets?

17:36

No?

17:37

You know it's a secret. It's his secret.

17:39

So now we know that Blake has a secret

17:41

out there.

17:42

I just want to say that if you're doing this in stocking

17:44

feet, if you have socks on, it's slippery,

17:47

it's dangerous. And if that's

17:49

how you die,

17:50

that one's

17:52

for me.

17:52

And when I start my Patreon it

17:54

will be revealed and I will

17:57

I will take the TII citizens

17:59

that I really want to know and take them

18:01

over to my Patreon and it

18:03

will be you have.

18:04

To say t I nation citizens.

18:06

Otherwise I don't know if it works at all. I

18:09

think it works for every citizens. Blah blah blah

18:11

nation. We'll work on it, all

18:13

right. What do you guys got to bring to the table.

18:16

Where I mean, I'm a pretty open book. I mentioned

18:19

that I jerk off. I gave times,

18:21

I gave locations. I you

18:24

know, I was pretty open. You you're the one with these

18:26

deep dark secrets about how

18:28

you jerk off.

18:30

It's a revelation though.

18:31

It really is the fact that you've that you only

18:34

stand and you never sit.

18:35

The fact that Adam stands to

18:37

ship and you stand to jack off. I'm like,

18:40

what do I stand to do? If that's the

18:42

three point stancer?

18:44

Yeah, you don't stand for anything.

18:46

That's true, damn it. I don't stand for anything

18:49

spineless.

18:49

Stand for the damn flag. I'll tell

18:51

you what I stand for, the damn flag. That's

18:54

for damn sure?

18:54

Is that what it is? Is there an American flag in the room?

18:58

Yeah? Absolutely, you take half.

19:00

I take my hat off, I put it over my heart.

19:02

I stand and I start to freaking. Now

19:05

that's disturbed.

19:08

Let's see that Purple Mountain majesty.

19:11

Absolutely, baby, what

19:15

else?

19:26

I mean, it'll be a few weeks old now, but we're we're

19:28

trying to stockpile some episodes up

19:30

because I'm gonna have a baby and then I'm gonna be out of

19:32

commission for a few weeks, and then

19:34

Kyle who no longer is part of the podcast.

19:37

It can't just be two guys. It's gotta be at

19:39

least three. You know, I'm gonna do you

19:41

know, so in

19:45

a few weeks. We're are going to come out a few weeks

19:47

late. But Blake is going to

19:49

the super Bowl, which I'm fine, stoked.

19:52

I can't wait to hear all about it.

19:54

But the baby, Yeah, hopefully

19:57

this is me two weeks into my celebration.

19:59

But I I'm very excited to.

20:01

Go me two weeks good way to put

20:03

it.

20:03

Yeah, it's it's the

20:05

first super Bowl. This is what's crazy.

20:07

It's in Las Vegas. Yeah,

20:10

I know, that's a weird place to have

20:12

a damn super Bowl. It's gonna be right.

20:14

Sounds fucking awesome.

20:15

It does sound awesome.

20:16

Yeah, I mean it is going to be very what you're talking

20:18

about. But it's just like it's almost

20:20

too awesome. That's what I'm worried about,

20:23

is like, what the freaking hell it is?

20:25

I know what you're saying. It's like the it's like

20:27

the city's almost kind of like

20:30

if you end up somehow not going to the super

20:32

Bowl for a whole other reason, you

20:34

might be fine, Like there's other shit going

20:36

down.

20:37

Yeah, I feel like it's the only city

20:39

that can actually handle the

20:41

super Bowl, like actually handle it because

20:44

there's so much going on there and

20:46

there's so much indoor space. You

20:49

can actually once the once the game

20:52

is over, all of those people can go to

20:54

thirty different casinos and

20:56

it won't feel that overwhelming.

20:58

Yeah, when like no other city has

21:01

that. And like I went

21:03

to the super Bowl a few years ago Tampa

21:06

Bay first the Chiefs and it was

21:08

in Tampa Bay and there's like

21:10

one stretch where people party in

21:12

Tampa Bay and it

21:15

was fucking bedlam, dude, it

21:17

was. It was scary. There was

21:19

multiple murders on that street that

21:22

night.

21:22

That's just Tampa, baby.

21:25

It was like people got killed. There was like

21:27

shootouts and ship it was wild.

21:29

But I think Tampa is like, yeah, Tampa's

21:31

a wild place.

21:33

Well sure, but I'm just saying like there was

21:35

like one main street, which is a lot of

21:37

cities had that where it's like you

21:39

know, in Austin it's like sixth Street.

21:41

It's like a lot of places just have the one

21:43

main drag and that's where everybody goes.

21:45

But Vegas, I mean, the main drag

21:47

is the Strip, but there's like forty casinos

21:50

that people can get lost in. I think. I think it's

21:52

a great point.

21:52

We went when it was in New York that seemed to be fine,

21:54

and when I went when it was in La I

21:57

mean, of course that's super duper

21:59

local for a lot of people. The thing I'm

22:01

noticing is that it seems like it's become and

22:04

maybe it's always been this and I just haven't picked

22:06

up on it, but in this era

22:08

we're in of like Grant for the Gram,

22:11

it seems like it's like, are you going to the Super Bowl?

22:14

As if like it's it's more

22:16

than just the game. If

22:19

you don't give a fuck about Super Bowl, there's

22:21

at least thirty parties to go to afterwards.

22:23

Yeah, That's the thing that I've noticed that's weirder

22:26

in any other way, is like I

22:28

think the Super Bowl started on

22:31

Monday for Las Vegas, Like, there's

22:33

been parties every day this week

22:35

and it's only leading up to Sunday

22:37

and then Sunday will will Sunday

22:40

will be the grand

22:43

celebration and depression.

22:47

Yeah, but I feel like people might even be

22:49

fucking out of commission. I bet you that five

22:52

percent of the people who are supposed to go to the Super

22:54

Bowl for one reason or another aren't even gonna

22:56

fucking go.

22:57

Could you imagine if you fucking got

22:59

the like six thousand dollars ticket

23:01

and you're just arrested.

23:03

Yeah, they're just handcuffed to a bed in

23:05

the at the Bunny Ranch and.

23:06

They're like, miss dude,

23:09

I promise you. There's just a lot of shit

23:11

going on leading up to it. You might be too hungover

23:13

or whatever, like hot at the table or like whatever,

23:16

you're just not even gonna go. Just not going.

23:18

You're like, ah, wait, oh, ship the games

23:21

on, like.

23:22

Like the party is gonna be going, and you're gonna be like, remember,

23:24

we're gonna break this up and go to the fucking game.

23:26

I don't know who knows five percent. Yeah.

23:28

Yeah, Well that being said, Blake, I'm very

23:31

bummed, Uh that I'm not

23:33

gonna be you know, I'm obviously I'm

23:36

yeah. Our agent gave us,

23:38

We gave us tickets. That's how Blake got hooked

23:40

up. And I know that they offer He

23:42

offered tickets to Durs and myself, And

23:45

I'm bummed that I couldn't be there because I know that

23:47

the game is gonna be great. I think it's

23:49

gonna be a really good game. And then beyond that, the

23:52

parties and how much fun we would have after

23:54

the game would be and before the

23:56

game and the daily would be a black

23:58

game. It would be so much fun.

24:00

Just sneak out what usher

24:03

usher and usher at the halftime Usher

24:05

super halftime dude, Wow, how

24:08

I just know how hungover you're gonna be.

24:10

You're gonna jerk off, like twelve times standing

24:12

out in that hotel. We're gonna

24:14

jerk might.

24:15

Do it sitting down. I might doing sitting

24:18

down.

24:19

You're gonna be standing up in that hotel

24:21

room, just cranking down.

24:24

I do kind of want you to try sitting down,

24:26

just to like realize, like, does

24:28

it feel better. It's still it's an option.

24:31

I don't know if it's better for you, but it's an option,

24:33

and I want you to know that it's an option.

24:34

Well, I will say it's better than

24:36

standing up like a fucking

24:39

loun What do.

24:39

You mean standing up? We found

24:42

out Adam had a bad bag because he was

24:44

sitting beating off so much that

24:46

his back and they're like, well do you stand

24:48

up or sit down?

24:49

Hey? That's that's that's the real stiff

24:52

person.

24:52

Hey, hey, wait,

24:55

hell on, we got that.

24:58

I feel like I feel like standing up.

25:00

It's like a It's almost like guys

25:02

can stand up to pee, like we

25:04

can do it, like I don't know if girls

25:07

stand up, and I don't

25:09

know if girls stand up in j oh. I feel like

25:11

it's an honor to be a male

25:13

and stand up.

25:15

J No, well to very

25:17

cool. Well no, I

25:20

couldn't have said it better myself.

25:21

It's not an honor.

25:24

No, No, How often do you think

25:26

females jo standing up

25:29

daily?

25:30

If I know women daily, if.

25:32

I know chicks the way I I know

25:34

that, I do never.

25:39

Okay, So I'm

25:41

embracing it.

25:42

So you're you're you stand up

25:45

to jerk off solely because.

25:47

Because women can't okay,

25:49

all right, it seems like you're rubbing it in their faces.

25:52

I stand up to Jay and

25:54

that's one thing I don't want you to do is

25:57

rub your j O in their faces.

25:59

Yeah. Well too

26:02

late, too late, boys,

26:07

too late. So Blazer, do

26:09

you know where these seats are? Are you in a box?

26:12

Are you down out there?

26:14

You're in a box? I know my poys up in a box.

26:16

Yeah, supposedly, I'm in the box of

26:19

maybe the Jacksonville Jaguar owner.

26:21

Like every owner gets a box. And I think I'm I

26:23

think I'm linking up with the Jags, dude,

26:26

which I dig because you

26:28

guys know I Jag stand uniforms

26:30

are off that jack stand

26:33

and their uniforms are pretty sick.

26:35

So it's a Bay Area to Jacksonville

26:38

connection in the box?

26:40

So are you? I

26:43

mean, are you? Do you? Are you gonna have to like beef

26:45

up on your Jacksonville Jaguar knowledge

26:47

because you're gonna be the owner. So you feel like maybe

26:49

you should have like, yes.

26:50

Who was their quarterback?

26:52

Trevor Lawrence?

26:53

Oh yeah, I think Trevor Lawrence has the

26:55

largest face I've ever seen in my life.

26:58

It's yep, it's

27:00

so big, not in a bad way.

27:01

It's not a bad looking face. I'm just like it. That's

27:04

a lot. He has a lot of face,

27:06

it's long, it's why.

27:07

Yeah, it looks like the girl who's

27:09

the witch in on the Nightmare

27:12

before Christmas.

27:13

But that is not what I'm saying. I'm

27:15

just saying no.

27:15

But it's not bad. It's not but not in a bad way.

27:17

I love that character, real sexy witch.

27:20

Cool.

27:20

Yeah, it's cool, and he looks

27:22

great and he has great hair and he's

27:24

the man.

27:25

Other than that, kind of like the mast from Saw

27:27

in a good way, in a really

27:29

good way, a way

27:33

in a really good way.

27:35

Yeah, it looks like, well, I wonder if he's going

27:37

to be I wonder if you are a football player.

27:40

Are you you go? I'm not

27:43

well.

27:44

I mean, do you go to the super Bowl or

27:46

or do you go? I don't give

27:48

a fuck. I'm not there, so

27:50

I actively don't care.

27:52

You just saw

27:55

football players in New York. We went. I remember seeing

27:57

Gronk and Gronk didn't play right.

27:59

Yeah, but Gronk there to make money. He was

28:01

like doing endorsement deals. Shit.

28:03

But I think they go to party.

28:04

Maybe this goes back to being in Las Vegas.

28:07

You go, it's Las Vegas. Everyone

28:09

goes, everyone goes. It's like

28:11

NBA All Star Weekend, it's green light.

28:13

We go even though we're ballers, we go, right,

28:16

we go, man, let's

28:19

go.

28:19

I think All Star Weekend is

28:22

actually in Vegas this year

28:24

for NBA. I believe

28:26

let's go.

28:27

Vegas is really uh really

28:30

starting to stake acclaim, reclaim,

28:34

reclaim its identity.

28:35

Wait, Vegas is really

28:37

starting to now steak acclaim.

28:40

I'm saying, it's saying like we are the hub,

28:42

like we are.

28:43

The fun it's Las Vegas. I feel like

28:45

it's been the hub.

28:46

It's been the hub, like the

28:48

convention Hub.

28:50

Hear me out. They got a football team,

28:52

they're getting a baseball team, they have a hockey, they're

28:54

gonna they're going to get an NBA

28:56

team. They're saying like, come here, now

28:59

that gamble is legal. They're like, just

29:01

yeah, let's fucking kick it here.

29:04

Yeah it is. It is the best. I like,

29:06

I haven't been in so damn long.

29:09

I went for a Green Day concert

29:12

not too long ago, but then before that, it

29:14

was like five plus years that I that.

29:16

I yeah, I'll be honest,

29:18

I don't. I don't love Vegas.

29:20

Like I'm not a Vegas guy. I think it's healthy

29:23

to not say like give yourself

29:25

over to Vegas, because if you do, it

29:27

can be dangerous.

29:28

Sure, but I'm saying it's perfect

29:30

for what it is. It's the best I think

29:33

for what because none of us are like real

29:35

club guys. And I think that's why we

29:37

didn't like Vegas when we were younger. But now we're older,

29:39

dude, So now we could go to like be a

29:41

little older and like go to

29:43

a dope dinner, get drunk, do

29:46

some gambling, maybe go

29:48

to like one of those like

29:50

like really cool lounges that aren't.

29:53

Like

29:56

one of those what is

29:58

it call where like that, like I don't

30:01

know, like they're clothes off they dance.

30:03

There's people that are like not

30:05

wearing all the clothes they should.

30:07

It's like a bar.

30:09

And then why and then that's that's where you

30:11

don't sit down every Yeah.

30:13

Blake, Blake's standing up in the corner

30:16

like doing whatever he's doing.

30:18

Is always standing Yeah,

30:20

yeah, I guess that's I I noticed that

30:22

about you when whenever we've been

30:24

doing in a strip club together, you're always

30:26

standing up. Yeah.

30:28

Huh, my hands in my pocket. Just with your

30:30

friend, I want to give him a lap dance. Can't

30:33

no lap no lap to dance. Sorry, move

30:35

on.

30:35

Why's he got to both his hands in his pocket?

30:38

No, he doesn't sit down. You can jump

30:40

on his back, He'll piggyback.

30:41

You move on, Serenity.

30:43

Get on those like cool lounges that

30:45

aren't a club. It's more of like you

30:47

have like a dope dinner and then it's like a cool,

30:50

uh upscale bar. I

30:52

suppose yeah, yeah, you know.

30:54

Yeah, I think Vegas is also like diversified.

30:56

They know that they want to have something for everybody.

30:59

Yeah, you could really get in the mixed,

31:01

dude, to do whatever you want to do.

31:03

That's what I meant to say. You can get in the mixed.

31:05

You can get in the mix.

31:06

No, I think there's a little something for everybody

31:08

in Vegas, even football. Yeah.

31:11

I just know that you can also get

31:13

into a lot of weird shit in

31:15

Vegas. What happens there stays there.

31:17

You can get into weird shipping. Yeah, I guess you can.

31:20

Yeah, I guess so fucking sure.

31:23

And by weird I mean lose a lot

31:25

of money. I'm just not like, I don't like

31:27

to gamble.

31:29

Is that what you meant by weird? I don't

31:31

think you know how the joke form works.

31:32

You don't like to gamble, not even not even

31:35

like a little bit like

31:37

like what we did when we were in gamp

31:40

in Philly and we're at the parks, Parks.

31:42

Calino, Ben's

31:45

Salem.

31:45

We're in beautiful Ben Salem.

31:47

Uh.

31:48

You don't even like to gamble, which is a few hundred

31:50

bucks play some blackjack? Is

31:52

that kind of thing?

31:53

Not really?

31:54

I like it. I also like to throw some craps

31:56

around, throw some dice.

31:58

But you go in thinking you're gonna win. I go

32:00

in knowing I'm gonna lose, and then we

32:02

all end up losing.

32:04

I go in knowing I'm gonna lose, and I'm just

32:06

like, how long can I fucking string this along?

32:08

Me too?

32:09

But what's so fun about going in like, yo, I'm

32:11

about to lose fucking all the

32:13

money I just took out of this ato because the

32:15

drinks are free.

32:16

Yeah, the drinks are free, and you're doing your shouting

32:18

and.

32:18

No, they're not free. They cost as much

32:20

money as you just took out of it. They're actually

32:23

more expensive than normal just because you get

32:25

to playing.

32:25

That's that's not how reality

32:27

works. They're not more expensive than normal.

32:29

You are the target audience for a casino

32:32

because you're like, oh, I'm getting free beers, but

32:34

really you're dropping fucking five six,

32:37

seven hundred dollars out of blackjack table.

32:39

But also I couldn't be winning or I'm

32:41

losing. So like if I'm winning, great, but I'm

32:44

also losing and paying to be playing.

32:46

Yeah, like the entertainment. I pay for the entertainment

32:48

of playing, and then the drinks are

32:51

free.

32:51

I understand the contents.

32:55

It's like, hey, you know, it's like how you know, weird things

32:57

having in Vegas.

32:58

I understand playing blackjack

33:01

isn't that fun. I'd rather play fucking

33:03

Mario Brothers. That's a little more stimulating

33:06

than playing blackjacks.

33:07

If they

33:09

do, I would love to go to a

33:11

casino where I can play Mario for a

33:13

thousand bucks.

33:14

And I bet I would.

33:15

I bet I would. You can play the mlooth Brothers.

33:18

I don't think that they have Mario,

33:20

but they actually do have video

33:22

games that you can gamble on in

33:24

Vegas. Where is it they have

33:27

like the video game lounges. They're

33:29

they're all over I think all the main casinos.

33:31

I know he is listening.

33:32

Well, I don't if it's like modern warfare. I don't

33:34

know if I can hang, but if they have like contra, I

33:37

think I could. I think I could make some money

33:39

like sign me Up or bubble Bobble or

33:42

balloon fight. I'm really good at those

33:44

times.

33:44

Well, I don't know, maybe if they

33:45

have balloon

33:48

fight, your radar at them. I

33:50

don't think they have contra or balloon fight,

33:53

but yeah, I'm.

33:54

Sure not sure about balloon fight.

33:57

I don't know.

34:06

What I want to do in Vegas is I want

34:08

to go. I've never gone and just sat there

34:10

and like they're in March and chircked off.

34:13

And I've never gone and just

34:16

watched like March Madness

34:18

and gone like during March Madness.

34:21

And just watching games at one of those giant bars. Yeah.

34:23

Yeah, one of those sports books and you just go

34:26

with your buddies and put money onto all the games.

34:28

So it's like, you know, it's extra exciting, and then

34:30

just sit there and get drunk and sit there all day

34:33

long.

34:33

Isn't Isn't it? Isn't there a place called

34:35

sports book? I think my homie is a bartender

34:38

there, the guy I went to high school with.

34:39

Oh, every casino has this sports book

34:41

that's what it's called.

34:44

I think there's a place called sports

34:46

Book where like it's a rooftop outdoor

34:48

bar with a giant fucking TV.

34:50

My don't mind if I do.

34:52

If that's the one, like with the pool, I feel like

34:54

they like, yeah, they it's like off.

34:55

The strip, it's a little down the road. Anyway,

34:58

put my feelers out, check it out. I'll

35:00

put you in touch.

35:01

Well, I'm excited for you, Blake.

35:02

I hope as we're speaking, my

35:05

team won. I hope they have contrast.

35:06

I personally hope your team doesn't

35:09

win, doesn't win.

35:10

But yeah, why is that?

35:11

Well, my family were Midwestern and they

35:14

all are huge Kansas City fans. So

35:16

you know, you.

35:17

Guys already won a bunch, man, just give me

35:19

this one.

35:20

So is the forty nine ers. Dude, they've

35:22

also won a fucking time.

35:23

It was so long ago I was just a baby.

35:25

Weren't they just there and lost it?

35:27

Yeah?

35:27

Yeah, they've lost very recently several

35:30

times. Dude, Come on, so that's what they do. Let

35:32

us get over to the hump.

35:33

Yeah yeah, yeah, I'm with you. I understand,

35:36

And that's why I'm like, if the Chiefs lose,

35:38

sick my boy Blake is having a fucking awesome

35:41

time in Vegas a lot, So I'm not

35:43

that mad at it. But

35:45

but I think it's cool that they have such

35:47

a dynasty as the Kent City

35:49

Chiefs. So I think it's pretty rare.

35:51

It's special, it's it's to be respected.

35:54

Yeah, I do like watching christ and McCaffrey

35:56

play.

35:57

Yes, in those pants?

35:59

Is that you're saying that dude, as the kids say,

36:01

he got a cheat code? Absolutely,

36:04

you're saying in those pants or what?

36:05

I don't even know what that means.

36:08

You like, just watch him play in the pant

36:10

those pants, you like football pants, those type

36:12

football pants or what?

36:14

What? What do you mean?

36:14

Do you like football pants? I like watching him

36:17

play football.

36:19

Okay, okay, in those

36:21

pants.

36:23

Yeah he's

36:25

wearing like okay,

36:27

he is wearing pants, right, Okay,

36:30

So I'm sorry. I thought I wasn't sure what you're saying. Yeah,

36:33

but I do he would like seeing him

36:35

play in those I

36:37

know.

36:38

I know my boy durs When he says

36:40

things like that, I feel he's

36:42

a little a little disturbed.

36:45

You're right, because

36:49

when I see Christian McCaffrey come on screen

36:51

in those pants, it's like.

36:52

Wait, I

36:57

that was not That was not an

36:59

ali.

37:00

That was a long way to go.

37:02

But I will have my finger ready.

37:04

I feel like when you watch him, you know, here's my

37:06

thing. When I watch him play, he's

37:09

so fucking fast. His legs are willing

37:11

so quickly, and he's cutting left and right. That

37:13

you go, yeah, that makes sense. But when

37:15

I watched Travis Kelcey, I

37:19

don't understand how he's always in the right

37:21

place at the right time. He doesn't seem

37:23

like especially quick or

37:25

like that he makes these crazy cuts. He just

37:27

seems like he gets to where the ball's gonna

37:30

go and he brings it down. I mean, it's

37:32

some outrageously what

37:34

is the wild catches in the last

37:37

game. But I'm always like.

37:41

Well, he's a tight end. Tight ends, that's they're

37:43

not wide receivers. They don't have

37:45

like the quickness. They're just big, like freaking

37:47

hulks.

37:48

And he's just a giant.

37:49

But what was like Terrell Owens, he

37:51

was a wide receiver and he has any fucking

37:54

fast as fuck and cutting people and.

37:56

Yeah, dude, wide receivers are insane.

37:58

That's like Jerry right, and so wait,

38:01

sorry, what's Travis kelce d d

38:03

so when they aren't catching the ball,

38:06

they're like blocking, so they have to be

38:08

like really big dudes. But when

38:10

they do catch the ball, and if they're athletic,

38:13

then all of a sudden, it's like a tank

38:15

running down the field.

38:17

And it was my boy, Tony Gonzalez

38:20

that kind of changed the modern day

38:22

tight end.

38:23

Correct, there we go, that's Kansas

38:25

City, right.

38:26

Yeah, it was a Kansas City chief, Tony

38:28

Gonzalez, who I did that Amazon

38:30

commercial with super nice guy, great

38:33

skin and he still looks like he

38:35

could play football. The guys like still

38:37

just jagged, like did not let himself go

38:41

so and

38:43

I was right next to him standing the entire

38:46

time. But

38:48

yeah, so he kind of changed what

38:50

the modern day tight end is is

38:52

like a little more athletic than what they used

38:55

to be, much like the Grondkinader.

38:57

And then now we got Travis Kelcey.

38:59

Oh yeah, big gronk. Yeah, big

39:01

guys.

39:02

Gronk at least with like fake he'd

39:04

like make cuts.

39:05

They're just make you seem like he's a little more athletic.

39:08

I think, so he seemed like he was. I

39:10

mean, he's so big that like

39:13

he's so big you don't realize how fast he is.

39:15

Yeah, you just want to see him standing there in his pants.

39:18

I'd rather see him sitting down, Honestly,

39:21

I'd love to see what down.

39:24

I feel like he could do a lot sitting down,

39:26

just like just like my homies.

39:29

So what why why can't you? I've

39:31

got family coming in town and Chloe's giving birth

39:33

next week. That's why I'm not going to the super Bowl,

39:36

durs. You just have like family stuff.

39:37

Emma's going skiing. I'm with the kids all weekend. There

39:40

we go. Do you think bad point?

39:42

Do you think you get tad points by taking

39:46

you take them to Vegas?

39:47

Yeah?

39:48

You you know, you stay at

39:50

a kid friendly hotel, the Circus

39:52

Circus.

39:53

Yeah, I feel like he could be fun.

39:56

You pay the waiter to watch them in the pool,

39:58

give them a bucket of quarters. Yeah yeah,

40:01

you give them a bucket of quarters and say hit

40:03

hit the arcade.

40:05

Which, by the way, this is what my parents used to do.

40:07

Like, yeah, wait, the first casino

40:09

you ever went to was it with your parents?

40:12

Right? Yes? And it was the uh, what's

40:14

the like Aladdin's Castle one, the

40:16

one that is like in Vegas.

40:18

In Vegas? You went to Vegas? That was your

40:20

first Uh, casino experience.

40:23

Yeah, I think so. Like I was like fourteen

40:25

or thirteen, however old that's damn

40:28

and uh we stayed at what's

40:30

the one that that like the dragon comes out

40:32

and breeze fire Excaloxcalibur.

40:34

We stayed there by the way.

40:36

Yeah, fucking place rocks.

40:38

It doesn't, dude, it doesn't.

40:40

It's reeks hilarious.

40:41

It reeks a mold.

40:42

It's pretty bad.

40:43

Yeah, is it still there? I love

40:45

that it's so bad. That's what I love about.

40:47

Yeah, it's so bad.

40:48

They're going to tear it down soon, right.

40:50

They have to if it's not already gone.

40:51

And then and then they like were like,

40:54

hey, we'll take you to Circus Circus. That'll

40:56

be fun. And then we go to Circus Circus

40:58

and then they I mean, they're not like degenerate

41:01

gamblers, but they're in Vegas, so they're gonna want to like

41:03

gamble a little bit. And then they just gave us

41:05

quarters and we just sat at the shitty

41:07

arcade at Circus Circus and played play

41:10

video games.

41:11

Time Crisis, Like, did your parents take you to Vegas?

41:14

This is not on my childhood.

41:16

No, I didn't go to Vegas.

41:18

My parents were cheap, and they got like a

41:20

it was like a discounted tickets and hotel

41:23

room stay because you can. They do

41:25

give great discounts. That'd

41:27

being said, it's don't

41:29

take your children to Vegas unless especially

41:31

if your kid is like thirteen fourteen. I was so horny.

41:34

Yeah, I do like the idea of my me

41:36

like sending my kids to like the

41:38

slot machine and then just they're at tal

41:41

just fucking it's holding it down

41:44

in a cabana. Yeah, they probably

41:46

could, dude, They're so jacked, they'd probably

41:48

do well.

41:49

They're ripped, they're shredded, shredded.

41:51

The first time I ever went to Vegas was I

41:54

think it was my eighteenth birthday and

41:57

my dad and my stepmom they took me

41:59

to see the Blue Man Group and that shit

42:01

was off the fucking hook.

42:03

Dude, we went to Vegas once

42:06

with you and your dad? Was that your

42:08

twenty first birthday?

42:09

That was my twenty first and the wheels

42:11

really came off. That shit was fun

42:14

too, and then.

42:14

We I remember, for whatever reasons

42:17

I look back, it must have been kind of

42:19

cold because I was like wearing a

42:21

cardigan, and I, by the way, hate

42:23

cardigans.

42:24

Yeah.

42:25

Never wore them, and for whatever reason.

42:27

It was the it was the era.

42:28

This this Vega, this Vegas trip.

42:31

I'm wearing a goddamn cardigan.

42:33

I think I think we were all like

42:35

tried to dress as cool as we could.

42:38

And you so somehow found

42:40

a cardigan somewhere and you're like, I think

42:43

this is what's trending right now.

42:45

Yeah. I think we tried to like age

42:47

up like ourselves, to be like

42:49

not just like because we looked like children

42:51

when we were twenty Oh my god. Well not Kyle kind

42:53

of always looked like a thirty eight year old

42:55

divorced dad. But yeah,

42:58

but we looked like kids. And

43:00

uh, and I think that was my way

43:02

of looking a little older is a.

43:08

It's like, yo, mister Rogers.

43:10

If you told me Blake was wearing a

43:12

fedora during this time, I would believe.

43:14

That I wasn't.

43:15

But I was definitely wearing like a black T shirt

43:18

that had like fake jewelry like

43:21

on it.

43:21

Out like the necklace print

43:24

or whatever.

43:24

Yes, yes, I'll post it.

43:26

That's cool.

43:27

I have a lot of photos. It's my twenty

43:29

first birthday, so I have those photos.

43:31

But I went there before that. I went for my eighteenth

43:33

birthday. I saw Blue Man Group and I think

43:35

I saw David Copperfield too, which

43:37

was fucking off the chains.

43:41

See that's what I'm saying. By the way, I want

43:43

to do what and what movie

43:45

was it that? Was it super bad? Not

43:47

super bad? Was it knocked up?

43:50

This is?

43:51

This is where they go and was it.

43:52

This supporting and they go and do uh maybe it is knocked

43:54

out.

43:54

Yeah, they go and do mushrooms and

43:56

then see circus so late. I'm like

43:59

that to me sounds like an absolute

44:01

wonderful day in Vegas.

44:04

You can you watch the super Bowl

44:06

with this new sphere thing? I gotta go to the sphere?

44:08

Can you watch the Super Bowl? Are they gonna er?

44:10

That would be brilliant. Of course I don't think

44:13

that is what is happening, but that would be absolutely

44:15

brilliant. But also I don't know, what

44:17

would it be like watching a football game

44:19

in a like dome form Awesome?

44:22

Well, dude, it would be. It'd be like you're at

44:24

the game.

44:24

It would be great.

44:25

It would be fucking phenomenal.

44:27

Yeah, I feel like you might want to throw

44:29

up too.

44:29

Though they would sort it out.

44:30

Well, you're not watching it like it's you're

44:32

not like hovering above. It'll be like the

44:35

game is happening here and then this.

44:37

So it'd be all around you.

44:38

When you watch football, it's straight ahead.

44:41

It would be three sixty.

44:42

I guess what. I would trust the people

44:45

who develop the way

44:47

you watch things to do it right. Not

44:49

year one, not year one, What

44:51

do you mean they've been people have been going that set. It's

44:53

off the fucking chain.

44:55

It does look cool, but they're not ready to pipe in

44:57

the super Bowl. Maybe year five they'll

44:59

be ready.

45:00

Listen to me, all they have to do is just broadcast

45:02

it as a big ass TV and had the recipe

45:05

black. It can be the sky, it can be whatever.

45:07

Well, then why would you want to be

45:09

in there? That place seems like it sucks. You're

45:12

trapped in up fucking because.

45:13

You're with twenty thousand people watching a game,

45:15

drinking and kicking it.

45:17

It doesn't sound bad.

45:18

That's literally every casino like sports

45:21

room like, but it's so much bigger,

45:23

dude, it's not.

45:24

It's not. It's it's the it's the

45:26

because it's the sphere and

45:28

you're with the five thousand other

45:31

people. However, many people fit in this goddamn.

45:32

Sphere look, just because you're actually going in the game. Fuck

45:36

you you can come too. Come on, bring the

45:38

boys, let's go, dude, Yeah.

45:40

Bring the play go.

45:42

I wanted to take them to a monster truck rally. But it's

45:44

next weekend.

45:45

God damn, what the hell, let's

45:47

go.

45:48

I think it was this past weekend.

45:49

Uh.

45:50

Down here in Anaheim, it was the past and it's

45:52

the next That's what got my I was like, oh, it's probably

45:54

a couple of weekends, and uh I

45:56

was wrong. What

45:59

else? What else? What else?

46:01

What else to talk about? That's

46:04

Blake Blake to tell us

46:06

his mystery.

46:07

Uh, no, way that.

46:09

Actually I have something I'd like to bring up. Did

46:12

you know that they are discontinuing

46:14

just continuing fruit

46:17

stripe gum?

46:20

You guys? Any

46:23

apologies?

46:27

Dude?

46:27

Didn't he take that?

46:28

Doesn't? I think we can even skip it. Uh

46:31

let's see, I'll see around Blake, have

46:33

a good.

46:33

Time, Blake. I mean,

46:35

yeah, that that gum sucks and it probably

46:38

shouldn't.

46:38

No, no, no, no, it is

46:41

what it is in terms of flavor. But I feel

46:44

like it means something to me.

46:46

I feel like it means something. Oh,

46:50

I think they're saying it's over and they're

46:52

just going to bring it back with flavor.

46:54

So people like Blake or like it means

46:56

something to me that gum due does.

47:00

Like remember when like they were like we're closing, Nate.

47:02

Now it's like, isn't that ship back open? And

47:04

everyone is writing like these diatribes on Instagram

47:07

about like the first meeting I ever took about

47:09

being a writer?

47:10

Was it? Well, say

47:13

classic American Los

47:15

Angeles diner, right, Nate, now,

47:17

yes, yes, yes, this is a

47:20

gum.

47:20

And I would say the fruit striped gum

47:23

is a quintessential gum for children

47:25

across.

47:26

The fruit stripe gum no juicy

47:28

fruit. I think it's worldwide.

47:31

You take juicy fruit over over fruit

47:33

striped gum.

47:34

Fruit stripe was the one with like little zebras

47:36

on it, and ship the zebra.

47:37

Was cool, yes, and tattoos

47:39

and tattoos like temporary tattoos.

47:42

It doesn't mean anything to

47:44

me.

47:44

And it was bigger, you got way

47:46

more pieces.

47:48

I honestly want to say that last thing I

47:50

ever bought with my own money was

47:52

a fruit stripe gum.

47:56

If you were to tell me that their discontinuous.

47:59

Is a fruit stripe gun gone.

48:04

If you were to tell me that they're discontinuing

48:06

like now and later.

48:07

I'm disturbed.

48:08

Then I would be they would do something to me,

48:10

but fruit striped gone now and later.

48:12

Yeah, but they wouldn't discontinue now and later.

48:14

No, now and laters aren't aren't that good?

48:16

I would?

48:17

I agree? I actually hate now laters.

48:19

Yeah, they're too hard.

48:20

I can't. I'm like this, I'm like, this is going

48:22

to be living in my teeth. I can't get

48:24

this out because.

48:25

You save it for later.

48:27

Sure, sure, okay, fair enough.

48:29

You have some now and then some

48:31

of it gets stuck in your teeth, and that's the later.

48:34

When they're too hard. They're

48:36

kind of sharp too. When they're hard, Yeah, stiff

48:39

man, And can we chop? Can we chop

48:41

that sound bite? Because I need that for the board?

48:44

Had hard?

48:47

Yeah, I just like, I

48:49

don't know, you need another four inches? Remember

48:51

when you would suck the jolly the

48:53

flat long jolly brancher, you could

48:55

suck into a shape, dude. And

48:57

can I get that for the board?

48:59

Everything that would slob

49:01

into a shank as it can?

49:03

Can I get that for the board? The

49:05

jolly rand, the big flat jolly

49:07

rancher, you could you could just suck it

49:09

in a way, dude, dude that

49:12

you could turn into a sharp ass shank or.

49:14

Like a candy cane when you would just deep

49:17

throat it and then slob on it

49:19

until sure it would get into a shank

49:22

or like.

49:23

Like a like a

49:25

like a raw cabasa, and you would

49:27

just kind of nibble on the tip a little bit

49:30

and just sort of like tease tease the tip

49:32

of it.

49:32

Now we were talking candy, dude, you know

49:34

you got you get all sexual with it?

49:37

Are you trying? I don't know. I feel like you're trying to do a joke

49:39

or something. We're talking about candy.

49:40

It's not all about bits here. Okay,

49:44

you brought up the gum?

49:45

Can you tell us the tale of Rumpel? Still skin

49:47

right quick? You wish?

49:49

No, no, we gotta do durseys uh

49:53

kid's story Corners huns

49:55

Christian unders stories.

49:57

Yeah, what do you got, dude? You got something?

49:59

Man?

50:00

Humpty dumpty? What do we got? Bro? Hit

50:02

us with it? Did he write The Little Mermaid?

50:04

It's possible.

50:05

I think I think you might have ye class

50:07

damn class.

50:08

I would love to hear that ship Hans Christian Anderson

50:11

is that right, it's Christian Anderson.

50:12

He's got some bangers, dude.

50:14

That guy knew was up.

50:15

I got a five hundred page book of Hans

50:17

Christian Andersen stories.

50:18

I remember when you bought that.

50:20

Yeah, huh, I don't like it. I

50:22

bought in college, but I love you.

50:25

No, Adam bought it for you.

50:27

No, I remember you at least having

50:29

that when we were like young, and you were like,

50:31

I have this five hundred page book, and I was.

50:33

Like, carries it around all the time.

50:35

He's fucking weirdo, dude.

50:36

I was like, how many pages.

50:38

Keeps like windows propped open? It's

50:41

stick enough to keep a window open, little breeze.

50:42

And yeah, it's your doorstop.

50:44

Yeah, this dude would pull up the Second City

50:46

with the fucking Hans Christian Anderson book,

50:48

Like have you heard the Tale of I'm what's

50:52

crazy?

50:52

Is I read? I only read

50:54

it standing up.

50:55

All of his references are the

50:58

Goldie Locks and rumpel Stilts.

51:00

Mm hmma, I

51:04

don't know.

51:05

Guy.

51:05

He does have hell a banger though that You're like,

51:07

oh, that's you think it was all the same guy.

51:09

All of Jersey's improv beats where

51:11

I'm gonna huff and puff and

51:13

blow over this door. We're

51:16

like, uh, well we're in a doctor's office,

51:18

but all.

51:18

Right, crossbows and mustaches is actually

51:21

uh hons and Fritz the fucking.

51:24

The first The first season

51:26

of Workaholics was too cold,

51:29

the second season was too hot, the third

51:31

was just right, and then four

51:33

or five six that.

51:35

Is due reading the

51:37

list of things. Oh, the Emperor's new

51:39

clothes. We all know that bad.

51:40

Oh, that one's actually really cool. That's where he

51:42

just has public nudity.

51:44

Yeah, he's all button naked.

51:45

And that's when you just turn on CNN and they're all

51:47

like, it's just the Emperor's new clothes.

51:50

All right, that's Drake.

51:53

Oh topical hold.

51:55

Of any take

51:57

backs, apologies and the epic slam

52:00

boys.

52:00

Oh man, I just

52:02

want to take back anything I said that made Blake

52:04

feel uncomfortable about usually

52:07

jacking off standing up. I think it's cool

52:09

for you, it's not necessarily what I

52:11

prefer.

52:12

Yeah, yeah, I also was going to bring that.

52:14

And it's not like I've never done it. I've definitely done

52:16

it. But on

52:19

one hand, how many times.

52:21

We've all done it. It's weird

52:24

how Blake was so kind of standoffish

52:26

and defensive about how much

52:29

he's done it or like where he does it.

52:33

Usually we're all very open and honest

52:35

and it's cool, and I'm sure I'm

52:38

the ugly definitely give flowers because we don't

52:40

do that, but I think it is. I

52:42

would like to pay my respects to Blake

52:44

for keeping some things for himself and

52:47

have his secrets, okay.

52:48

And just to kind of the princess and the peak.

52:51

Yeah, and just to kind.

52:52

Of build off what you guys are talking about, like fruit

52:55

Stripe, gun Man, I'm gonna miss you man, all

52:59

right.

53:00

Yeah, we can end it there, all right, And that's another

53:02

episode