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876 - Decoding your bad habits

876 - Decoding your bad habits

Released Tuesday, 30th May 2023
Good episode? Give it some love!
876 - Decoding your bad habits

876 - Decoding your bad habits

876 - Decoding your bad habits

876 - Decoding your bad habits

Tuesday, 30th May 2023
Good episode? Give it some love!
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Episode Transcript

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0:00

in this episode i wanna talk about

0:02

how to decode your bad

0:05

habits that is how to

0:07

understand what's actually

0:09

going on with the behaviors

0:12

that you're trying to change and why it's

0:14

so difficult to make it happen

0:16

get excited because this is

0:18

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1:19

a kroger we know the minute a tomato

1:21

is picked off the vine the fresh timer starts

1:24

the sooner we get our produce to you know fractured

1:26

his that's why we've completely overhauled

1:28

are process to shorten the time from

1:30

harvest to home for our tomatoes

1:33

strawberries and salads because we

1:35

know how much you love fresh produce we

1:37

give you more time to enjoy your tasty

1:39

fruits and veggies at home so whether you're shopping

1:41

in store picking up or prefer delivery

1:44

were committed to bringing you the freshest produce

1:46

possible kroger fresh for every

1:49

welcome

1:49

to another episode of

1:51

tiny leaps been changes

1:54

were usher simple strategies you can use

1:56

to improve your life my

1:59

name is greg clooney

1:59

And today I want to talk about something

2:02

called the behavior chain. This is something

2:04

that I learned from an app that I'm currently using

2:07

to help me with fixing some of my bad

2:09

habits, especially those around eating. And

2:12

as I was going through it, I realized this

2:15

could have a lot of value to bring to

2:17

the rest of the community, the rest

2:19

of the people listening to this podcast who

2:21

also have their own changes they're

2:24

trying to drive in their life. So

2:26

I want to talk through how this works

2:28

and try to explain

2:29

how we can use it to create

2:32

the type of change that we're looking for. Now, a

2:34

couple of quick caveats. First of all, I

2:37

am traveling. So if you're watching the video, you'll

2:39

notice I'm not in my normal studio space. I

2:41

am in a bedroom. So forgive me for that.

2:44

If anything feels messy or anything like that.

2:46

And the second part as a piece of traveling

2:49

is that I don't have my normal microphone.

2:51

So I have set up a decent system and hopefully

2:54

it sounds good enough to

2:57

help this message get through. But

2:59

forgive

2:59

me for not being at the normal sort

3:02

of quality that you've come to expect from

3:04

the show. So with all of that said, the

3:06

behavior chain is this idea.

3:08

It's sort of this sequential series

3:10

of actions and

3:12

things that occur around

3:15

a behavior occurring. And

3:17

the four pieces of it are the trigger, the

3:19

thought, the action and the

3:22

consequence. And in this episode, we're going

3:24

to dive into each of those. But

3:26

there's a couple of really important things

3:28

to understand when it comes to the behavior

3:30

chain. The first is that each of the pieces

3:33

are sequential. So they happen

3:35

one after the other in that

3:37

order, and it doesn't really change.

3:40

Now, what that means for people like you and me is

3:42

that if we could in theory

3:45

understand each piece

3:47

of this around the specific actions

3:49

and behaviors that we are trying to change,

3:52

we could change areas

3:54

further up the chain in order to have

3:57

effects further down. So,

3:59

for example. if you wanted to. So

4:02

let's get into some examples. One

4:04

of my personal habits that

4:06

I'm trying to shift is that I do a lot

4:08

of late night snacking. So I tend

4:10

to stay up late to work. I'm a night owl. I'm

4:13

working till one, two, three AM.

4:16

And right around like midnight, one

4:18

AM ish, after a full day, I'm usually

4:21

running low on energy. And so I

4:23

reach for a snack to sort of

4:25

replenish that. And that by itself

4:27

isn't necessarily a bad thing, but

4:30

I have this stated goal of losing

4:33

X amount of pounds. And so this

4:35

type of action moves me away

4:38

from that goal. And therefore it's something I want

4:40

to change. Now, when I take

4:43

this behavior and I break it down into

4:46

this sort of like four

4:48

pieces of the behavior chain model,

4:51

I look at the trigger. So it's that feeling

4:53

of being tired, being

4:56

run down, and also

4:58

some environmental factors like it being later

5:00

in the day and so on and so forth. Now the thought

5:03

is typically unconscious. It's more like

5:06

I'm running out of energy. I need to refuel.

5:08

The action is reaching for that

5:10

bag of chips or making the PB and J

5:13

or getting the crackers or whatever it might

5:15

be.

5:16

And then the consequence

5:17

is whatever comes after that.

5:20

So it's putting on

5:22

a few more pounds if this happens regularly

5:24

or being sort

5:26

of feeling bloated and not as comfortable

5:29

as I'd like the next morning or whatever it

5:31

might be. Now, if I take that and

5:33

I map that behavior to this sort

5:35

of behavior chain, in theory, because

5:38

they're sequential, I should be able to change

5:40

the trigger

5:41

or the thought

5:43

and therefore create change to

5:45

the action and the consequence.

5:48

That's the basic idea. That's why this

5:50

is a powerful thing to understand. Now,

5:52

if you stick around in the episode, we are going to talk

5:54

about why this isn't that simple because

5:57

it's not, obviously there's a lot

5:59

of factors, both. internal and external that

6:01

make this much, much harder to deal

6:03

with than just, here's the formula,

6:05

go do it. But that is the theory

6:08

that I think it's worth approaching the rest

6:10

of this episode from. So let's

6:12

jump into each of those components. So the first

6:15

piece is the trigger. Now a trigger

6:17

can be an internal trigger or an external

6:20

trigger. It is essentially anything that

6:22

occurs that leads to

6:24

the rest of the chain. So that could be

6:26

a feeling. It could be the feeling of being angry

6:29

or hungry or tired or sad

6:31

or happy or whatever it might be. Or

6:33

it could be an external event, something

6:35

like driving past McDonald's or

6:38

walking past your favorite coffee shop

6:42

or hearing a certain song

6:44

or whatever it might be. There are these external

6:46

events and things that you're responding to

6:49

as well as internal feelings and things that

6:51

you're responding to. And those make up the

6:53

trigger. And there's a few different types of triggers

6:56

that sort of fall into this. There are social

6:58

triggers, environmental

6:59

triggers,

7:01

emotional triggers, financial triggers. There's

7:04

triggers sort of built into the life

7:06

that we have created for ourselves

7:08

because ultimately those triggers drive behavior.

7:11

And behavior is good or bad or

7:14

neutral. It's not really the

7:16

right place to pass judgment on it, but

7:18

there is a trigger attached typically

7:21

to every action or behavior you're

7:23

engaging in. And again, those triggers could

7:25

be internal or external. So

7:28

it's worth understanding where these come

7:30

from and what makes them so incredibly

7:33

challenging to deal with

7:36

and to control. But that's the high

7:38

level understanding of your triggers. They can

7:40

be internal, external. They can

7:42

be feelings or events. And

7:45

there are a number of them baked

7:47

into just our everyday lives, even things

7:49

that we don't recognize. Now let's

7:51

talk about the thought. The

7:54

thought typically happens unconsciously

7:56

or consciously. It's the essentially

7:59

the best way to think about it. is it's the immediate

8:01

response to the trigger. So something

8:03

happens or you feel a certain way and

8:06

your immediate response, that's

8:08

what the thought is. Now it might not happen

8:10

in the same way that you currently sort of have

8:12

an idea of what a thought looks like.

8:15

You're not necessarily sitting down and like thinking

8:17

through every step of what you're gonna do next or

8:20

crafting your plan of action or anything like that.

8:22

Sometimes that's the case, but

8:25

usually it's a very quick thing.

8:27

It's that immediate response that occurs

8:30

right after the event, right after the trigger

8:32

happens. And there's a lot of things that go

8:34

into making up what that thought will

8:37

be. So this is why it's difficult

8:39

to sort of predict what it

8:41

is and what it's gonna be and how you can

8:44

sort of change it. But

8:46

there's a lot of things that go into this. There are belief

8:49

systems that you grew up in. There are contextual

8:52

issues that you might be navigating. There are

8:54

environmental factors, social factors.

8:56

There's financial factors. There's the

8:59

particular level of stress that you're under in

9:01

that moment. There's whether or not you're hungry

9:03

in that moment, whether or not you're

9:05

anxious in that moment or in a good mood,

9:08

who you are around when it happens. There

9:10

are so many factors that go into how

9:13

you are going to respond to

9:15

a trigger. This is why I've never been a huge fan

9:17

of like, oh, you can't control what happens to you. You

9:20

can only control how you respond.

9:23

That's cute and it's a great quote,

9:25

but it's not that simple. Like it's

9:27

not as easy as just, oh, control

9:30

your response because we don't really know what

9:32

goes into creating our responses.

9:35

Our responses happen as

9:37

a weird amalgamation,

9:39

Frankenstein's monster of

9:41

all of the things that have led up to this moment

9:44

from the day we were born to this

9:46

event occurring. And it can be really tricky

9:48

to untangle that web and start

9:50

to see a clear connection between I

9:53

responded in this way because of

9:55

this thing. Now that doesn't mean we

9:57

shouldn't try to control those responses.

9:59

But I just want to point out it's not

10:02

as simple as, hey, just control

10:04

your reactions. Like, that's not

10:06

really great advice. Quentin

10:09

here runs a sustainable clothing brand.

10:11

Hi there. He's excited that his shipping

10:14

company FedEx has set a goal of having

10:16

carbon neutral operations by 2040. Impressive.

10:19

When an influencer tweeted about his recycled

10:22

bamboo t-shirts, Quentin unexpectedly

10:25

became quite popular. I'll

10:27

take it. He uses FedEx to reach

10:29

new customers

10:29

around the globe. While making

10:32

Earth a priority. FedEx.

10:35

Where now meets next.

10:37

At Kroger, we know the minute a tomato

10:40

is picked off the vine, the fresh timer starts.

10:42

The sooner we get our produce to you, the fresher it is.

10:45

That's why we've completely overhauled our process

10:47

to shorten the time from harvest to

10:49

home. For our tomatoes, strawberries,

10:52

and salads. Because we know how much you

10:54

love fresh produce, we give you more time

10:56

to enjoy your tasty fruits and veggies at

10:58

home. So whether you're shopping in-store, picking

11:01

up, or prefer delivery, we're committed

11:03

to bringing you the freshest produce possible.

11:05

Kroger, fresh for everyone.

11:08

Now

11:08

the next piece is the action. So

11:10

this is the actual behavior that you engage

11:12

in. And I break this up into two categories. You

11:14

have your conscious action and your semi-conscious

11:17

action. Now the conscious action is the one that

11:19

we all know. We all think about it. It's, hey, this happens,

11:21

so I'm going to behave in this way. The semi-conscious

11:24

is where it gets interesting. This is typically

11:27

where like habit lives. This is you

11:29

are responding in this way because you've been

11:31

conditioned to respond in this way, either

11:34

by choice or for other reasons. And

11:36

it's not that you're unconsciously

11:39

responding. Like you're still there.

11:41

You're just not engaging with the response

11:43

enough to be able to interrupt

11:46

it if you wanted to do so. Now

11:48

here's an example. Let's go back to my particular

11:51

goal and my issues with

11:53

snacking late at night. So that

11:56

response isn't an unconscious

11:58

behavior. not something that I'm

12:00

like completely tuned out of. I

12:03

know that I'm making the PB&J, I know

12:05

that I'm opening this bag of chips and

12:07

that I'm definitely going to finish the entire thing

12:09

right now. Like I know these things consciously,

12:12

but I'm not engaged enough

12:15

to recognize that I don't want to

12:17

be doing this. It's just happening

12:20

because I am used to doing

12:22

that. Because in this situation, in this

12:24

context, with this trigger, my

12:27

natural response that I've developed over

12:29

whatever period of time is to do this

12:32

thing. So that's what I call a semi-conscious

12:35

response or a semi-conscious behavior.

12:38

And then lastly, we have the consequence. So what

12:40

makes up the consequence? Well, it's not negative.

12:42

That's where I want to start with this. I think a lot of

12:44

people hear the word consequence and they think

12:47

that's a negative thing. That's like, I did

12:49

this thing so I'm facing these consequences.

12:52

But really, consequence is just what

12:54

happened as a result of this behavior.

12:56

What happened as a result of this thing happening?

12:58

That could be positive. You can have positive

13:01

consequences of you went for a run,

13:03

you felt great afterwards. That's a positive

13:06

consequence. You can have negative consequences.

13:08

In my case, sometimes I go for a run and then

13:10

I get a really bad migraine afterwards. Still

13:13

a positive behavior, but negative

13:16

consequence. And so I

13:18

think it's important that we start to decouple

13:21

what consequences are versus

13:23

the behaviors that led to the consequences.

13:26

Because one can be positive while the

13:28

other is negative. They're not necessarily

13:31

intertwined. So think of a consequence

13:34

in this case as just the result

13:36

of what happened. Neither in positive

13:38

nor negative inherently. We'll

13:41

sort of have to judge that on its face.

13:43

Now let's go back to what I shared in the beginning

13:45

about this. The idea that each of these

13:47

pieces, they're sequenced, they're interrelated.

13:50

Changing one affects things

13:53

further down the chain and that's why

13:55

it's valuable to understand how this works. But

13:58

as we've seen, we now understand how this works. how each

14:00

of these pieces work individually,

14:03

it's not as simple as to say, hey, change

14:06

the trigger or change your response to it and therefore

14:08

you'll change your action or your consequences.

14:11

That is technically true, but

14:13

it's significantly harder to deal

14:15

with or to actually follow through on

14:18

than it makes it sound. Your

14:20

triggers come from any number of factors,

14:22

many of which you do not understand. Many

14:24

of those factors come from the environment

14:27

that you live in and the culture that you grew up in

14:29

and the things that the people around you prioritize.

14:33

It's very difficult to change

14:35

your triggers and to avoid

14:37

negative triggers if you live in an area

14:40

that those things are constantly in front

14:42

of you. And so Meats is telling you, hey,

14:45

change your trigger, change your routine, do what

14:47

you need to do in order to avoid this. That's

14:49

not necessarily going to be helpful for

14:51

every person watching this video or

14:54

listening to this episode. And so

14:56

I want it to be clear, there

14:58

is a process here that can help us

15:00

to drive change. That is the purpose

15:03

of sharing this approach. If we can understand

15:05

it, we can figure out how to apply it to our situation

15:08

and we can aim to be great at it a

15:10

percentage of the time, knowing

15:12

full well that we're gonna fail probably

15:15

the far larger percentage

15:17

of that time. But we need to recognize

15:19

that there are other factors that go into it besides

15:22

just our own willpower

15:25

and our ability to follow through.

15:28

So what are some of those factors? Well, there are socio-cultural

15:31

issues, there are political issues, there are environmental

15:34

issues. I always give this example. It's

15:36

really hard for somebody who wants to

15:38

eat healthier and make healthier choices to do

15:41

so if they live in a food

15:43

desert where fresh fruits and vegetables

15:45

aren't really available. It's much easier

15:47

for them to run into triggers that lead

15:50

to them snacking poorly

15:52

or eating poorly or shopping poorly because

15:55

of the environment they live in. And that's not something

15:57

they necessarily

15:58

have control over You can say

16:00

you

16:01

should just get up and move then. But

16:03

is that really a practical response?

16:05

Is that something that most people will

16:08

be in a position to be able to do? Maybe

16:10

that's great advice if you are middle class,

16:12

upper middle class or higher, but if

16:14

you are anywhere below that on the

16:17

income scale or if you

16:19

make enough money but have such high expenses

16:22

through sometimes no fault of your

16:24

own. There's a consequence of debt

16:26

here. There's a consequence of being

16:28

a person of color and often having,

16:31

and I don't remember the exact study, but you

16:33

often have significantly more

16:36

requirements to support your aging

16:38

family than people

16:41

who aren't of color. And so you have all

16:43

of these factors that play into

16:45

are you able to just pack up and move because

16:48

this situation is not moving

16:50

you towards your goals. Oftentimes

16:52

you can't. For the majority of the United

16:54

States at least, you can't. And

16:57

so just telling you change your triggers

16:59

doesn't really work. That's one of the situations

17:02

and that happens far more often than I

17:04

think we're willing to admit where it can

17:06

be challenging to actually apply this. Similarly,

17:09

you might be in a perfectly great financial

17:11

situation. You may live in a wonderful area,

17:14

but have and be in a relationship

17:16

where one partner is

17:18

consistently pushing social

17:21

triggers onto you, triggers that

17:24

lead to you snacking in a certain

17:26

way or spending in a certain way or behaving

17:28

in a certain way simply because it's

17:31

more consistent. And so having

17:33

an unsupportive partner, having someone who

17:35

was not willing to work with

17:37

you and maybe not change their life, but

17:39

change how they interact with you based on

17:42

the goals that you've said you have, that

17:44

can also be a massively limiting

17:46

factor that makes it just almost

17:48

impossible sometimes to actually create

17:51

the type of change you're looking for. My

17:53

point here isn't to go down the Rolodex

17:55

of reasons why we can't change

17:58

our lives. I absolutely do not.

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