I am possessed. How I became a slave to my new iPhone

A cry from the heart. A short while ago, I was a reasonably functioning human being, capable of independent thought and action... then I acquired my new iPhone. 
It replaced my ancient model, which was showing all the functions of a deteriorating piece of hardware. After great hesitation, I plunged into buying the Apple 15 phone, allegedly the much-improved version of my existing product.
The transfer was easy-peasy, or so, my fellow members of the Apple cult assured me. Unassured, I took their advice.
I will spare you details of the purchase and transfer of vital information from my old phone. I now realise I have fallen into a diabolical plot, which renders me helpless against forces that threaten to ruin my life.

• Stay up-to-date with all of Tudor's podcasts, blogs and current affairs commentary by signing up to our newsletter!
• Email [email protected] to sign up!

• Follow Tudor on Twitter @Tudortweet
• Follow Tudor's blogs:
• everydaycreativity.uk
• leaderswedeserve.wordpress.com