0:05

Hi there, we know that

0:05

what is personal is universal. I

0:08

am Amanda Loveland. And I am

0:08

Jessica devenish. Welcome to the

0:12

conversation. Here we are, what is the final

0:19

episode of season one? I think

0:24

it's Episode 2324 is Episode 24.

0:24

I think I maybe.

0:32

I don't know. But either way,

0:32

it's the final episode of season

0:35

one. kind of crazy. I know. kind

0:35

of crazy and super cool, right?

0:40

But yeah, I gotta find out I

0:40

have to find. So when we started

0:45

we Oh, this will be Episode 23.

0:45

I was wrong. Oh, very nice.

0:50

Awesome. For some reason, I kind

0:50

of had 25 in mind. I don't know

0:54

why. I don't know why we just

0:54

knew it would kind of like,

0:57

yeah, show up, however. So

0:57

Amanda will be heading up her

1:03

other podcast full time now. And

1:03

then I will take over this one,

1:09

I presume I will keep it the

1:09

same name. Maybe just you came

1:12

up with the title. So it makes

1:12

sense for you to keep that and

1:15

it's a good name. I'll rebrand

1:15

it probably a little bit and

1:19

restart recording season two.

1:19

And I don't know what

1:23

I was doing soon at the

1:23

beginning of the year, maybe

1:26

December? I don't know. Yeah.

1:26

take a little break. And I'm

1:29

excited. And thank you for inviting me to do this podcast.

1:31

Well, it's fun when we

1:34

collaborate and get together and

1:34

then have these fun

1:37

conversations and run into

1:37

people that don't know us, but

1:41

then are like, Hey, I listened

1:41

to you on your podcast. Right?

1:44

Yeah. That's so fun. Yeah,

1:44

podcast, I found to be

1:48

interesting, because if you post

1:48

something on social media, they

1:51

like it, or they reply to it. So

1:51

you're well aware of who is

1:57

participating. Right. But on

1:57

podcast, you have no idea. who's

2:00

listening. I mean, you can see

2:00

the number of downloads, but you

2:02

don't know anything. Right? So

2:02

it's interesting when somebody

2:06

will say something about my

2:06

podcast, and I'm having Oh, wow,

2:10

you listen, you're like,

2:10

surprised.

2:13

So I think that's, that's

2:13

interesting about podcasts.

2:17

Yeah, it is. super interesting.

2:21

And like, I'm, I'm worried that

2:21

Mike's a little too far away for

2:24

your face. Is that better? Yeah. So today, you want to talk about

2:27

gratitude? I do. Yeah, I do.

2:30

It's interesting. We've never

2:30

talked about gratitude. Since

2:33

it's such a foundation of like,

2:33

my life. And and where I coach

2:37

and how I teach and how I live.

2:37

When did it become a foundation

2:42

of your life? It's probably been

2:42

four years.

2:47

16? I would think, yeah. And

2:47

then gradually just kind of

2:52

grown. How did it come to me?

2:52

You did it just come in? Or did?

2:56

Did you have a coach or

2:56

something that? Well, I started

2:59

Angie smart. I was already kind

2:59

of practicing gratitude. And

3:04

then when I started working with

3:04

Angie smart, that was why I was

3:07

drawn to her is because their

3:07

first 30 days of coaching, when

3:11

she was with her previous

3:11

company was gratitude. So that

3:15

kind of drew me to her. Yeah.

3:15

And then of course, she just

3:19

taught me so many other things

3:19

since then. But gratitude, I

3:22

feel like it's just it's one of those staple

3:25

foundational pieces for any type

3:28

of healing and happy life. And

3:28

yeah, and I think this morning,

3:32

I was feeling into it. It's like

3:32

for me when I gratitude puts us

3:36

in the heart, right. And when

3:36

they if you've ever heard

3:39

there's these cameras, I don't even know what they're called. But they will take pictures of

3:41

your aura, which is your

3:44

energetic field that we all

3:44

admit. And these cameras that

3:48

capture that when they're,

3:48

they'll put someone through

3:51

different emotions and their

3:51

aura will change how far out it

3:54

goes from the body. Well, when

3:54

the heart goes into lover to

3:57

gratitude, it goes out beyond

3:57

the room, it gets massive. So

4:01

it's always been fascinating to

4:01

me how especially in the heart

4:04

space and those different

4:04

emotions or those different

4:07

thoughts that will put us into

4:07

the heart space are such a man

4:11

like it's such a magnifying

4:11

emotion and feeling that happens

4:15

and the ripple effect that

4:15

happens from there is is quite

4:18

fascinating. Well, I totally

4:18

agree. I think we talked about

4:21

this once before those little

4:21

copper rods Oh yeah, the

4:24

divining rods Yeah, yeah, so I

4:24

mean, we've done exercises where

4:27

there's a group of people in a

4:27

room and when the when Amanda

4:30

walks in, everyone says he says

4:30

don't look at her, just like

4:32

she's not in the room and just

4:32

ignore her right? And it's

4:35

interesting when you're holding

4:35

those rods like they just stay

4:37

close. But when you do the

4:37

opposite, like if everyone is

4:39

going to show Amanda love and

4:39

gratitude that she's here, when

4:43

Amanda walks in the room, those

4:43

rods go wide open. So there is

4:47

an energetic Oh yeah. emotional

4:47

experience that happens when you

4:51

live from gratitude. Just

4:51

generally, and gratitude. I

4:55

mean, it can be really simple. I

4:55

think when I first started it

4:57

before I started up with energy

4:57

smart. It was more like

5:00

Hey, I'm acting from a place of

5:00

gratitude more often just

5:03

literally being in awareness of

5:03

how often I may be getting

5:08

frustrated, as opposed to being

5:08

grateful if something frustrates

5:12

me, right, so how do you find a

5:12

gratitude in something that's

5:15

frustrating? Well, it's a learned habit.

5:17

Gratitude is more affirming.

5:21

Now, it's like a, it's like a

5:21

state of being more than just a

5:25

an emotion, wouldn't you say?

5:25

Yeah. So before you're like,

5:29

wow, that really hurts. I'm

5:29

really frustrated about that.

5:32

And big breath. The pause

5:32

relieves the pause for me the

5:38

pause of Okay, wow, how is a

5:38

crappy thing to say? And

5:43

they just kind of like, like we

5:43

talked about before, where the

5:46

clouds just kind of come in and

5:46

go now just kind of goes in and

5:49

you does, you don't take it on,

5:49

you don't absorb it. Because

5:53

really, who knows what the other

5:53

person is even going through

5:55

their comment may or may not

5:55

have anything to do with you.

6:00

Yeah, so being in gratitude,

6:00

really, I think there's

6:04

awareness, then there's just

6:04

empathy. Like, of meeting the

6:08

other person, wherever they are,

6:08

yeah, like what's going on? My

6:12

mind? Are you okay? Today, like,

6:12

you know, kind of checking in

6:15

with the other person, or maybe

6:15

just letting it roll off and not

6:19

taking it. I mean, it's taken me

6:19

30 years with some people, I'm

6:22

not gonna say names. This is some people that this

6:26

incessant incessant experience

6:30

with this person that I'm,

6:30

they're never going to make me

6:33

smile, I'm never gonna make them

6:33

smile. There's just something

6:36

about this person that we don't bring out the best in each other. And finally, accepting

6:38

the fact that that really has

6:41

nothing to do with me. Well,

6:41

then there's the gratitude that

6:45

you can find in any circumstance

6:45

for what's the learning? What do

6:49

I get to lean into with each

6:49

experience? Or what is it that

6:52

it's showing me so if there's

6:52

someone that's showing up and

6:54

being a total asshole, hey, I'm

6:54

actually really grateful that

6:58

they're showing me who they

6:58

really are. Because I would

7:00

rather not have a relationship

7:00

with that person. You know, so

7:03

there's always I feel like

7:03

something to find gratitude in.

7:07

And in fact, this reminds me of

7:07

a quote, I was listening, I

7:10

don't remember where I heard it,

7:10

but I had to write it down

7:12

really quick, oh, it was the

7:12

truth will set you free. But

7:14

first, it will piss you off. And

7:14

I'm like, Oh, my gosh, is that

7:18

not perfect for anything, you

7:18

get triggered, you know, and you

7:21

get to look at whatever's going

7:21

on inside or even these moments.

7:24

And there's gratitude in that.

7:24

Because every time if we lean

7:27

into it, there's growth that can

7:27

happen. And in that, you know,

7:31

I'm always grateful for, even

7:31

though there's some really

7:33

painful, painful experiences,

7:33

right? You know, right, I agree

7:38

with you, too. And when you say

7:38

that about friends, I've had

7:40

lots of friends over the years

7:40

where maybe I didn't react the

7:43

way I do now, if they do

7:43

something that is hurtful, I'm

7:46

really grateful. Now, I can say,

7:46

stand in my power, and say thank

7:50

you for showing me who you truly

7:50

are. Now, I said, Thank you for

7:53

showing up as your authentic

7:53

self, because I know and

7:56

recognize that maybe my

7:56

relationship with you is going

7:59

to be a little more distant or a

7:59

little more different, or I'm

8:02

going to choose differently with

8:02

you. And I'm grateful that they

8:04

showed me that right earlier on,

8:04

then maybe later. So I think

8:09

just inherently my response, my

8:09

reaction, my perspective, my

8:13

awareness, my empathy for where

8:13

they are, has shifted immensely,

8:17

because I live from a place of

8:17

gratitude. When I think too,

8:22

that puts us in an A, when we

8:22

start looking at things from a

8:26

unawareness of work. And I find

8:26

gratitude in this moment, we

8:29

start popping out a little bit

8:29

more of the everything is so

8:33

personal, everything is so

8:33

personal. And it isn't to what

8:36

you're saying. And maybe it has nothing to do with you. And they're showing up in how, how

8:38

they are wanting to show up. And

8:42

I think when we start pulling

8:42

out of the attachment to how

8:46

things should be, and letting

8:46

people just be themselves. I

8:50

know for me, I had a really

8:50

challenging experience with

8:53

someone that I had known for

8:53

years and years and years. And

8:57

we had talked about doing a

8:57

business together. And as we

9:00

were kind of starting to

9:00

navigate some of these pieces,

9:03

you could already tell there was

9:03

some like, okay, maybe just

9:06

harmony in how we both operate.

9:06

And so it was kind of suggested,

9:10

Hey, why don't we try and do

9:10

these few events together. And

9:12

then let's see. And I was really

9:12

grateful that we did those

9:16

events, because what transpired

9:16

Next, I mean, I cannot tell you

9:20

the amount of pain and oddness

9:20

and weirdness that transpired

9:23

within the next several months I

9:23

mean, almost a year. And looking

9:27

back at it, it while it was so

9:27

painful, I was so grateful

9:30

because it's like I can't

9:30

imagine doing what I was going

9:34

to do with this this person in

9:34

my life versus where I'm at now.

9:37

And so I'm so grateful that the

9:37

universe showed up for me in

9:40

that way, you know, or Yeah,

9:40

gave you that experience before

9:43

you really took another step in

9:43

Yeah, yeah. Well, and it is, I

9:48

mean, some people might say it's

9:48

corny to say you know what's not

9:50

happening to you, it's happening

9:50

for you or through you, but 100%

9:54

that is like, so spot on. Like

9:54

those moments where you really

9:58

got your ass kicked or something Really bad happened. You're

10:00

like, Oh, so grateful that I

10:03

really got to know who they were

10:03

I got to experience that, I got

10:06

to know that I got to pivot, I

10:06

got to go a different direction,

10:10

because that's not in alignment

10:10

with now. And I think when we

10:14

get to that place where we're

10:14

more of observance, because we

10:16

are and we do have an awareness

10:16

that this is all happening for

10:19

me. So what is what is showing

10:19

up for me right now? is it's a

10:23

huge gift to be able to have

10:23

that perspective, because then

10:27

we're not so attached to things,

10:27

and it's not as painful. Well,

10:31

and what if the other person's

10:31

honestly doing the best they can

10:35

with what they know, or what

10:35

they have? Or what they're going

10:38

through? What if that person

10:38

showing up for you, in whatever

10:42

facet it is, even if it might be

10:42

a hurtful situation? That might

10:44

be the best they have to offer?

10:44

Right? Yep. And so showing

10:48

gratitude in that sometimes is

10:48

just as graceful as anything

10:51

else. You know, when I love I

10:51

think it was when we interviewed

10:56

and yeah, Angie was on our podcast, I'm like, but I loved her. She talked

11:00

about I think it was on that one

11:02

where she talked about gratitude

11:02

actually bounces right in the

11:04

left hemisphere in the brain.

11:04

What do you think is a really

11:07

powerful tool, you know, with

11:07

gratitude, having gratitude that

11:11

it balances both, it's like,

11:11

that's a really beautiful place

11:13

to move from in the world.

11:13

Because when we're, you know,

11:16

one side or the other, more, you

11:16

know, for more submissive and

11:19

more feminine and more docile,

11:19

we probably don't have very many

11:22

boundaries, or for more

11:22

masculine, we're trampling over

11:25

people. I mean, I'm using very

11:25

extreme examples. But yeah, I

11:29

think it's really beautiful,

11:29

especially if you're trying to

11:31

have more balance in the

11:31

feminine or in the masculine.

11:34

How cool is that? That maybe

11:34

even just practicing gratitude

11:37

every day could bring more of

11:37

that into balance. And that's a

11:41

really simple practice. It is a

11:41

simple practice. And I think

11:44

that's why some people get

11:44

tripped up. How can you be so

11:47

profound? If it's so simple?

11:47

Yeah, yeah, those are the most

11:51

profound things that I've ever

11:51

experienced are the simple ones.

11:54

Love, like you said, coming from

11:54

a place of love coming from

11:56

place of gratitude. But now how

11:56

can it be manda that's too

12:00

simple? Well, because that is

12:00

just the way that I think God

12:04

intended. All those simple

12:04

things are really the big

12:07

things. The profound ones, one,

12:07

why do we want to complicate

12:10

everything? Why does it have to

12:10

be so much more complicated than

12:13

just what is? Like we can have

12:13

simplicity in life? And yeah,

12:18

because we as humans come in,

12:18

and we're like, there has to be

12:21

weight. That was bad one time.

12:21

And so you naturally associate

12:25

that with something bad? Like,

12:25

what what it is, life is just as

12:28

simple as us just having

12:28

experience. That's it. That's

12:31

it. And what do you want to do with

12:33

it? Well, I was working with a

12:36

client last week, and she was

12:39

saying that she really wanted a

12:39

new job. She was upset with her

12:42

husband, she was frustrated with

12:42

her daughter, and she just, she

12:44

had already changed jobs twice

12:44

this year.

12:48

So I finally just said, because

12:48

I hadn't I've been working with

12:50

her for the whole year. But I

12:50

just said, What? What is it that

12:53

you're looking for? Because I

12:53

don't know that what you're

12:55

looking for is going to be found

12:55

in the jobs, right? Or your or

12:58

your husband? Or your daughter?

12:58

Does she even know what she's

13:01

looking for me? It's you, maybe

13:01

you need to start here, right?

13:04

Because you can find a different

13:04

job. Really, that's just

13:07

location. That's just geography,

13:07

that's just better, you can keep

13:10

changing jobs every month. If

13:10

nothing inside changes, right?

13:14

You're never gonna find whatever

13:14

it is. Yeah, let's define what

13:18

are you looking for? What is it

13:18

about job? Number one you didn't

13:20

like? job number two? Like what?

13:20

What is it? Yeah, what is it

13:24

that you're looking to maybe be

13:24

fulfilled? Right? Or is what

13:29

hole? Are you trying to fill by

13:29

things on the outside of you?

13:32

Because obviously, it's not

13:32

working? Well. And I think we

13:35

tend to sometimes, especially

13:35

with today's world, focus on

13:38

what's not working, instead of

13:38

what is working. So we kind of

13:42

stripped it down and said, Okay,

13:42

what is working with your

13:44

husband? What is working with

13:44

your daughter? Right? What is it

13:46

about job number one or job

13:46

number two that you liked? And

13:50

she really, I think she'd been

13:50

in such a place of disgust and

13:53

anger and frustration that

13:53

coming from a place of what it

13:57

is that I do? She needs because

13:57

she only knew what she didn't

13:59

want, right? Okay, you already

13:59

know what you don't want. What

14:02

do you want? Her eyes? were

14:02

like, I don't even know the

14:05

answer to your question. Because

14:05

she's, I haven't thought about

14:08

what I do want for so long. I

14:08

just know what I don't want. So

14:13

that is a really interesting

14:13

paradigm shift. If you can come

14:16

from that place, and that starts

14:16

with gratitude. What do you

14:20

want? And what are you grateful

14:20

for and what you already have?

14:24

Why this is a beautiful example

14:24

of So, so often in our lives,

14:29

and then we know that we need to

14:29

know these people. And maybe

14:31

you're one of these people that

14:31

you're so rundown with all the

14:37

woes of the world and all the

14:37

woes of your life that you

14:39

cannot see anything beyond that,

14:39

like it's just that's your

14:44

world, and that's what you've

14:44

created. And that's the thing is

14:47

is that is 100% what you've

14:47

created or what these people

14:50

have created. And the beautiful

14:50

thing is, it's just one thought,

14:53

one really beautiful, eloquent

14:53

thought or question of what do I

14:57

want? What does make me happy?

14:57

What does

15:00

Like me at what makes me feel

15:00

good and grateful. And, you

15:04

know, it's like making taking

15:04

time for that to shift that

15:07

paradigm of not everything has

15:07

to be shitty.

15:11

It's all about perspective.

15:11

Yeah. 100% every time, which

15:16

again, that seems too simple.

15:16

First, there's an awareness,

15:19

right? I always encourage people

15:19

to say, okay, just be aware of

15:24

words that are coming out of

15:24

your mouth, for the next week.

15:28

Like, just be aware of the

15:28

little the limiting, limiting

15:31

beliefs and the limitations that

15:31

you're expressing on a regular

15:35

daily basis that are coming out

15:35

of your mouth. And that

15:37

awareness in and of itself, I

15:37

think, to most people, it's a

15:40

little shocking when you agree.

15:40

They're like, wow, I do say,

15:44

Don't a lot, or I can't, or I

15:44

try, or I'm whatever, right,

15:48

right, that awareness of the

15:48

words coming out of your mouth.

15:51

Mm hmm. That in and of itself is

15:51

a perspective that you should

15:56

probably start with. While and

15:56

we keep talking about how you

15:59

know, it's simple, so it can't

15:59

be true, it's like actually, in

16:01

the simplicity, when we come to

16:01

the simple simplicity of any

16:05

situation, that's usually where

16:05

the piece is found. It's always

16:09

where the piece is found, at least for me. You know, I'm rewriting this

16:12

book that I published and then

16:15

took down and it's really

16:15

interesting going back through

16:18

and this books around all my

16:18

relationships, right. And in

16:23

some ways, it's challenging to

16:23

read through it, although

16:25

there's a different level of

16:25

where I'm at in my life now,

16:29

from where I wrote it before,

16:29

but you know, we all make these

16:33

choices in life. And then at the

16:33

end of the day, the only reason

16:36

why we're making these choices

16:36

and the only reason why these

16:38

things are happening to us is

16:38

for our learning and our growth

16:41

every single time. There is

16:41

something in there that's asking

16:44

for us to be broken through

16:44

unless we want to shut off

16:49

but going back to that gratitude

16:49

piece man, Travis and I think we

16:52

shared this on another episode.

16:52

But trav my husband, he was in a

16:56

really dark place. So yeah, we

16:56

and I did this I think when I

17:00

shared it before Trevor had a

17:00

challenging childhood and has

17:04

had a challenging life. And he

17:04

could be one of those people

17:08

that we're talking about that

17:08

everything just shitty, just

17:10

crappy blah blah, he went

17:10

hunting the other day. This is

17:14

my husband my husband loves to

17:14

hunt and he has had stories of

17:18

just crappy hunting and great

17:18

stories too. But here he goes,

17:22

he's off by himself his son

17:22

can't go because he got injured

17:25

in football he loves hunting

17:25

with his kids so again, it's

17:28

like this okay, but I'm still

17:28

gonna go cuz I really love to do

17:30

it. And he's going up the

17:30

mountain whatever He hears this

17:34

bugle that's just huge and

17:34

amazing and close and I'm not a

17:37

hunter so you can tell by the

17:37

way that I'm talking about this

17:40

You're doing great. So as he goes up, I'm going to shorten the story

17:43

he has three opportunities to

17:46

shoot this huge ball huge ball

17:46

and like not just he knows he

17:50

would get the shot. And every

17:50

time he goes in three different

17:54

spots By the way, every time he

17:54

goes to pull the trigger click

17:59

the bullet doesn't fire so he

17:59

takes it out puts another you

18:03

know cartridge and the bullet in

18:03

doesn't fire click, and he's

18:06

like, and he's hiking down the

18:06

mountain I need help. I'm like,

18:09

well, honey, three times, like

18:09

usually three, three is a

18:12

significant number when

18:12

something happens three times

18:15

that's a it's not just random,

18:15

like there's something here to

18:18

pay attention to. And I said so

18:18

maybe there's a message in this

18:22

for you maybe you should kind of

18:22

check into that. And he goes the

18:26

whole way down the mountain I'm like if Amanda tells me there's some learning in this I'm gonna

18:28

lose my shit. But that's kind of a side little

18:32

story. But he was in a really

18:35

dark place for a little while

18:35

and he was doing some different

18:39

things different working with

18:39

some different people. But he

18:43

started at night before you go

18:43

to bed go through everything he

18:46

was granted a grateful for

18:46

putting his hands on his heart

18:50

and going through everything he

18:50

was grateful for. And for him,

18:54

that was what shifted

18:54

everything. And shortly after

18:57

that, this thing that like a lot

18:57

of things started coming in for

19:01

him. So it's you know, while

19:01

it's simple, it the magnitude of

19:06

what can happen is powerful. I

19:06

agree. I love that he did that.

19:10

I think that's awesome. Yeah.

19:10

Well, and I always encouraged

19:13

gratitude journals, like we all

19:13

have, I love to journal a

19:16

gratitude journal, I think in

19:16

and of itself is powerful. Yeah.

19:19

gratitude. And if you don't know

19:19

what to journal about why people

19:22

say I don't even know where to

19:22

start. Well, are you thankful

19:25

for a person a place or a thing

19:25

that you can be grateful for a

19:27

thing in my car? You got a roof

19:27

over your head? Cold water, hot

19:32

water, running water? How about

19:32

fresh? I mean, there's millions

19:36

of people that will never

19:36

experience running water. I

19:38

mean, it could be it could be

19:38

that. Yeah, it could be. So I

19:42

just encourage people to first

19:42

start with awareness what's

19:45

coming out of your mouth, and

19:45

then do a gratitude journal,

19:48

person place or thing while we

19:48

don't know what else to see?

19:50

Yeah. And I felt like the more

19:50

you do this, the more you're for

19:55

me. I noticed the beauty of the

19:55

world shifts. Do you notice this

19:58

like all of a sudden he's just like, wow Like the sunsets are more

20:00

beautiful and the mountains are

20:02

more stunning, and there's just

20:02

more moments in your life that

20:06

just kind of take your breath

20:06

away. Well, it's kind of like,

20:10

somebody turned the color on,

20:10

like, everything's more vibrant.

20:13

Everything resonates like a

20:13

higher vibration. higher

20:16

frequency. Yeah. And it just

20:16

Phil's

20:20

just even being out in nature,

20:20

the green on the trees, or the

20:23

green on the grass or the

20:23

flowers. I mean, I was talking

20:26

about sunflowers earlier this

20:26

year. And I said to Kelly, I'm

20:29

like, my husband, I said, they're just

20:31

more sunflowers this year, or is

20:34

it just my awareness is

20:34

inherently different. And I

20:38

thought it was maybe my

20:38

awareness until I walked on my

20:40

walking trail that I've done for

20:40

years, and I'm like, aha, there

20:43

really is more sunflowers than

20:43

But again, it's probably both it

20:47

probably is. But it's

20:47

interesting that I'm, I think

20:50

that is a beautiful place to

20:50

come from gratitude. Are you

20:52

aware of it? Was it there

20:52

before? Are you just now seeing

20:56

things from a different like

20:56

perspective? different lens? And

21:00

do smart always talks about

21:00

lenses? Like just what what

21:03

color rose colored glasses? Are

21:03

you looking through? Or? Or is

21:06

everything black and white? Or

21:06

is everything dim? Yeah, like

21:09

where are you? What are you

21:09

seeing? What are you the lens?

21:12

What lenses are you seeing?

21:12

Yeah, for me, I had a huge

21:15

paradigm with going through

21:15

shamanism, that's where my, like

21:19

perspective was everything all

21:19

of a sudden, I know it was

21:23

actually going through the

21:23

triangle of disempowerment going

21:25

through the drama triangle, and

21:25

we did some actual somatic

21:28

experiences. And that was such a

21:28

huge paradigm shift where I

21:33

could see things from a totally

21:33

new perspective. And, man, that

21:37

changed my world. In a beautiful, beautiful,

21:39

beautiful way. So if you ever

21:42

come to any of our retreats, I

21:42

almost always do triangle work,

21:45

because it's powerful. How are

21:45

you playing out in the triangle?

21:48

Because we all do it well, and

21:48

what role Are you playing? If

21:50

there is a situation that you're

21:50

not happy with? What role Are

21:53

you playing? Yeah. Victim

21:53

perpetrator, rescuer if you're

21:55

not familiar with the drama

21:55

triangle? Yeah, it has two

21:59

names. Right, the drama triangle

21:59

and the triangle of

22:01

disempowerment. Okay. Yeah, I've

22:01

heard it as both. But I noticed

22:05

too, when I, when I am in more

22:05

of a place of gratitude, there's

22:09

more things in my world to be

22:09

grateful for. All of a sudden,

22:13

you're like, wow, this showed up

22:13

for me. And wow, this showed up

22:15

for me. And when I was leaving

22:15

religion, and I don't know why

22:20

this is popping in me, you know,

22:20

when you leave religion, it's,

22:23

it can be a challenging place.

22:23

But I was so centered and very

22:26

calm with this decision. And so

22:26

I was very heart centered in my

22:30

choice. And so I seem to be

22:30

moving through the world in that

22:32

way. But I would have moments to

22:32

where you feel really alone. And

22:38

I was kind of starting to dabble

22:38

more in the spiritual world. And

22:41

so I get my first tarot deck,

22:41

which, you know, that is a big

22:44

No, no, in Mormon land. So it's

22:44

like, Oh, here we go. And oh, my

22:48

gosh, then messages that I would

22:48

get, like, the little things

22:51

that I would start receiving was

22:51

such a, you're not alone, like,

22:54

to so many moments for me to be

22:54

grateful for my experience that

22:57

I was going through, that it

22:57

made it easier to move through,

23:02

you know, that goes back to

23:02

awareness, right? Being aware of

23:06

those things popping in. Now 100%? Well, I think, I mean,

23:08

we it's cliche, you know, where

23:14

your focus goes, grows. But I

23:14

think like, where they're going

23:17

weeds are, we're going flowers,

23:17

just like I teach people, if I'm

23:19

working with a business

23:19

executive about culture, you're

23:23

planting something something's

23:23

happening here, right? Which is

23:26

it? Because you get, you get to

23:26

decide. And you're either doing

23:29

it consciously or

23:29

subconsciously. So are you

23:32

fertilizing those things?

23:32

Because if a flower is not

23:34

growing, you're not saying

23:34

something's wrong with the

23:37

flower, you're saying

23:37

something's wrong with the soil,

23:40

something's wrong with the

23:40

environment around it. So I

23:42

think if we simplified life, if

23:42

something's not working, right,

23:46

the flower in and of ourselves

23:46

before the flower, and that was

23:49

Nothing's wrong with us, just

23:49

how can we change the soil? How

23:52

can rain fertilize something

23:52

differently? Maybe we need more

23:57

water, or maybe we need more

23:57

satellizer son or something in

24:01

the environment needs to change.

24:01

It could be as simple as saying

24:06

thank you, to your children for

24:06

emptying the dishwasher. Oh,

24:10

yeah, saying thank you for

24:10

picking up your shoes saying

24:13

thank you for making your bed.

24:13

Things that maybe frustrated you

24:17

before and now they're doing it?

24:17

Did you did you notice that they

24:20

did it? And did you say thank

24:20

you this time? Or are you only

24:23

noticing it when they don't do

24:23

it? And that can create a really

24:26

negative culture in your family

24:26

environment too. Because as

24:30

parents, we kind of set the

24:30

tone. Not kinda we do what isn't

24:36

what would piss me off and it's

24:36

not the case as much anymore.

24:38

But when my kids were young, if

24:38

I was having a bad day, my kids

24:41

were terrors. And it was like,

24:41

What in the hell? It's like, oh,

24:45

because they're feeding off

24:45

mom's energy. She's grumpy so

24:47

everybody's gonna be grumpy. And

24:47

it's like, no, I need you guys

24:50

all to be happy because I'm

24:50

grumpy and I mean, my moment it

24:54

was like what in the crap? I

24:54

always that frustrates me all

24:58

the time. When I was trying To be the best mom and I was

25:00

like, Who doesn't want to be

25:02

left alone today? You're gonna

25:02

get put yourself in timeout. Mom

25:06

timeout. Yeah, I've done that

25:06

before. But that I mean, even as

25:11

you're saying that it's like,

25:11

that's something where my

25:13

husband is very much, he leaves

25:13

me notes and things all the

25:15

time. And he loves to give. But

25:15

his thing is, is that

25:19

appreciation, he wants to know

25:19

that he's appreciated. And I'm

25:22

not always the the best at that.

25:22

But I think with any person, I

25:25

don't care who you are. And when

25:25

you're talking about your kids,

25:28

or your partner, or even your

25:28

employees that that simple act

25:32

of just Hey, thank you for

25:32

taking, you know, thank you for

25:34

doing that. Thanks for making

25:34

the bed. Thanks for whatever it

25:37

is, especially with our kids,

25:37

the more we do that and

25:40

acknowledge them, the more

25:40

they're actually willing and

25:43

wanting to do more of those

25:43

things. So Well, I think those

25:46

of us that are perfectionist

25:46

like they do it, but then it's

25:48

not quite the way you would have

25:48

done. So then you find yourself

25:51

Well, that's great. And or

25:51

that's great, but right, so then

25:54

they're like, well, I don't even do that anymore, because it's never right. What's the point

25:56

where you're creating that

25:59

culture, too? And like it starts

25:59

with us? Yeah. So I'm grateful

26:01

that you made your bed, and I wish you would have done a little better. Yeah, I mean,

26:03

what what are the words coming

26:06

out of your mouth? Yeah. I mean,

26:06

I've caught myself doing that.

26:09

Thank you for doing your

26:09

laundry. And did you really just

26:12

shove it into the basket? Yeah,

26:12

I should have just stopped.

26:15

Thank you for doing your

26:15

laundry. Right Period. End of

26:18

story. Yeah, he did it. He did

26:18

it his way. Am I not been mom's

26:22

way. But guess what, if he did

26:22

it, and I walked in the laundry

26:26

room, and there's clothes all

26:26

over, I just take a big deep

26:29

breath. He did laundry.

26:33

Yay. Yeah. adamant about me talking about

26:36

that I really, really, really, really, really want to say

26:38

something right now. It's so true. It's so true. But

26:41

I think it's just being aware.

26:45

And that perspective is pretty

26:45

critical. Yeah. I had, you know,

26:50

it's, it's, it's fascinating,

26:50

really how the act of gratitude

26:54

affects so many different facets

26:54

of our life, you know, from the

26:58

simple things every day of

26:58

everything that we're talking

27:00

about to even on the larger

27:00

scale of can we look back at our

27:04

life and recognize everything

27:04

was exactly as it should have

27:08

been. And I think that that is

27:08

one of the more challenging

27:11

things, especially if you've

27:11

been through traumatic,

27:14

challenging hardships in life.

27:14

And I had, I had done a video a

27:18

few days ago about how we're

27:18

always on our right path. I

27:22

think a lot of times and I know

27:22

I was in this place several

27:25

years ago of worrying and being

27:25

worried or afraid that I wasn't

27:28

on my right path, right of

27:28

making the right decisions. And

27:32

I had someone say to me, you're

27:32

always on your right path, why

27:35

would you ever question and it

27:35

hit me pretty hard. And I've had

27:40

a few people in my world right now that are going through something similar. And so I

27:42

shared this video and, you know,

27:45

I'm on Instagram and trying to

27:45

do you know, it's part of my

27:48

business. So it's like, I guess

27:48

I'm gonna do a real and I have

27:51

30 seconds to do a real so I

27:51

hurry up and blah, blah, blah,

27:53

blah, blah. And when a guy

27:53

posted, and said, Man, this is a

27:57

really broad statement, and I

27:57

don't agree with you. And

28:00

essentially, he shares that he

28:00

used to be a coke addict. And

28:03

had I listened to this video

28:03

when I was on coke. This would

28:06

have completely I can't remember

28:06

how he put it, but would not

28:09

have been good for him. And, and

28:09

it was an interesting, and I

28:13

thought about that for a minute.

28:13

It's like no, I still agree that

28:15

no matter where you are in your

28:15

life, you're on some level,

28:18

you've chosen that experience.

28:18

You know, and, and I think with

28:23

anything, even in that

28:23

experience of being a coke

28:25

addict, he's now three years

28:25

sober. I am certain there are

28:29

things that he learned in that

28:29

experience, he probably has more

28:31

empathy for people going through

28:31

challenging times. And I'm sure

28:35

he has a vast list of things

28:35

that he learned through going

28:38

through that, that only through

28:38

that experience would he have

28:41

gained. And in that there's

28:41

immense gratitude. Yeah, that

28:45

only comes from hindsight, though, right? I mean, in the moment in the thick of it. Oh,

28:46

yeah. In the fire. He's

28:49

certainly a forest for the

28:49

trees, he probably would have

28:51

saw your comment and just rolled

28:51

his eyes and just thought

28:55

ridiculous, right? He probably

28:55

wouldn't even been on I mean, if

28:57

he's a coke addict. Granted,

28:57

he's probably not going to find

29:00

my content. Yeah, right. True.

29:00

like attracts like. But yeah,

29:05

yeah. But I think a lot of

29:05

people probably say, well,

29:07

that's well, you only say that

29:07

now. Because things are great,

29:10

or whatever. Well, yeah. Because

29:10

of your perspective, in the

29:14

moment, now, you're in a place

29:14

now where you're seeking my

29:16

posts, you're seeking my

29:16

information. you're seeking my

29:19

content, right. But I think it's

29:19

probably it's fair to say a lot

29:23

of my most beautiful shifts in

29:23

my life came from really dark

29:27

time, right? some of our most pain. If we learn from those things,

29:30

right? If we're growing, and

29:33

let's be honest, like we're

29:33

being we're human beings, we're,

29:36

we're always evolving, right?

29:36

Always. That's what we're here

29:40

to do. And to crack the shell

29:40

and remove the layers. I mean,

29:44

I, I feel like the more I'm

29:44

learning, the more I'm

29:47

understanding that it is just

29:47

layers that we're removing, to

29:50

really get into the core of who

29:50

we are and what we're asked what

29:53

we're asking to experience in

29:53

this life. What our sole purpose

29:56

is just removing one layer after

29:56

another sometimes it feels a

29:59

little daunting. Yeah. And other times it's like,

30:02

the more I learn the more I want

30:05

to learn, right? Yeah, right.

30:05

It's like never ending. Yeah.

30:08

Give me more feed me more. Yeah.

30:08

Because there's like a whole

30:11

other world that opens up. And I'm not simplifying what

30:13

people have really crappy

30:17

situations, right? And I don't

30:17

think you are either. I think we

30:19

also just both gone through some

30:19

really painful things. So we're

30:22

not saying this from a place of,

30:22

yeah, we had the flu. And that

30:25

was our thing we've ever been

30:25

through in our lives. So and

30:28

yes, a lot of people have gone

30:28

through very, very difficult

30:31

things. And so have you and I, we're not minimizing it. We're

30:34

not now. I have had friends over

30:38

the years, we don't understand

30:38

why Harry, how do you even know

30:41

that? Yeah. Because I'm choosing

30:41

to come from a place of

30:44

gratitude and love anyway,

30:44

right? Like, that's a conscious

30:47

choice that I'm always we always

30:47

have a choice point, I choose to

30:51

come from a place of gratitude.

30:51

And if you choose to come from a

30:54

place of victimhood, or

30:54

whatever, then that's your

30:57

choice to maybe that's serving

30:57

you. For now. You know what,

31:01

sometimes in the darkest

31:01

moments, we want to be the

31:04

freaking victim because, and I

31:04

remember one of these moments

31:08

very, very vividly, I was in

31:08

tears. My world had just been

31:11

ripped out. I just found out

31:11

some information and I was in

31:14

shock. And one of my closest

31:14

friends was like, reaches across

31:18

the table as I'm in tears. Oh, I

31:18

am so happy for you. And I'm

31:22

like, are you kidding me right

31:22

now. And I was so mad at her.

31:26

This is my good friend Holly.

31:26

Not our Holly a different Holly.

31:31

And she goes I know But aren't

31:31

you so grateful. You know this

31:34

now? Because then you can make a

31:34

choice from right now I'm not

31:37

grateful. But later on, I'm

31:37

like, No, I want to be in this.

31:40

I'm hurting. This is painful. My

31:40

heart is ripping open right now.

31:45

And then later, she was having a

31:45

moment and I'm like, Holly, I am

31:48

so excited for you as she goes,

31:48

Oh, that's how that feels. I

31:51

said yeah. Well, let's talk about that. I I

31:54

think being in it is is an

31:58

important part of the process

31:58

too. We're not saying that if

32:01

some if I mean my world's been

32:01

ripped out from underneath the

32:04

underneath me before too. And yeah, I think when you come

32:07

from a place of gratitude, then

32:10

you're like, well, it's gonna be

32:10

okay. But in those moments is

32:12

not going to be okay. Nothing's

32:12

okay. Your entire world has just

32:15

shattered and broken down and fallen apart and you have no idea what to do. Right? You

32:17

don't know what to do next. You

32:19

don't know how you got here,

32:19

like you is there's an impending

32:22

doom filling. And I think being

32:22

in it, like literally being in

32:27

that moment and feeling your way

32:27

through it. And not stuffing it

32:30

down, is how you become a

32:30

grateful soul. It's how you live

32:35

from a place of grace and

32:35

gratitude and empathy. And love

32:38

is because you sit in your shit

32:38

literally. And you feel that

32:42

moment, it might last for an

32:42

hour, it might last for a day,

32:45

it might last for a week, might

32:45

last for a year it might and

32:49

just going through that. And

32:49

then recognizing that maybe you

32:53

are at a choice point now and

32:53

you don't want this anymore. You

32:56

want something deeper, or you

32:56

want to shift something you want

33:01

a new perspective, I often think

33:01

of a conversation I had with

33:04

Michelle or our amazing friend

33:04

about this because she's really

33:09

big and use it and your stuff

33:09

and you fill it and for me

33:14

especially this last program I

33:14

just did with her there is

33:16

immense power in that moreso

33:16

than I've ever experienced with

33:20

really sitting and allowing the

33:20

emotions to move through without

33:24

naturally we for me I turned to

33:24

food or I turned to zoning out

33:29

on TV or whatever it is so that

33:29

I don't have to feel whatever's

33:33

coming up or why this thing is

33:33

coming up. I mean I think that's

33:36

a natural human state we do

33:36

anything to avoid pain and yet

33:40

in those painful moments is war

33:40

some of our a it can go through

33:44

in five minutes or five seconds

33:44

if we just sit in it for a

33:47

minute. And and some of our

33:47

greatest learning goes through

33:51

that and we're also allowing our

33:51

bodies to deprogram because

33:55

there is a chemical and all the

33:55

systems that are going that have

33:59

been used to and conditioned to

33:59

a certain environment for a

34:02

certain amount of time and now

34:02

we're asking for something

34:04

different and when we ask for

34:04

something different then it's

34:08

going to feel uncomfortable so

34:08

can we sit in the discomfort and

34:11

her she said something to me

34:11

that was so profound and I to

34:14

this day it's like that was a

34:14

really big piece for me. If

34:18

you're a Christian and you

34:18

believe in Jesus the you know

34:20

the Garnham guess m&e, and where

34:20

he was in the darkest, the

34:23

lowest of his lows, and he says,

34:23

God, why has hast thou forsaken

34:27

me? He went through his dark

34:27

night of the soul. God

34:31

supposedly left and he didn't

34:31

leave a he. Jesus had to go

34:35

through that in order to do what

34:35

he was going to do next in order

34:37

to grow what he needed to grow.

34:37

And that because often I think

34:42

for anybody that is Christian

34:42

looks at that and goes, God left

34:46

grace in his lowest moments when

34:46

we think that we are supposed to

34:49

be there or God is supposed to

34:49

rescue us. We have this

34:53

environment of thinking people

34:53

are supposed to rescue us, or

34:56

Food Rescue rescues us or social

34:56

media or tea.

35:00

We are what I mean, look at all

35:00

the things that we have in our

35:03

world. Yeah, it is right

35:03

thinking that we have to be

35:06

rescued. And what are we trying

35:06

to rescue ourselves from

35:09

ourselves? Feeling what needs to

35:09

be felt so that we can move

35:12

through so that we can actually

35:12

have something else in our lives

35:15

that we're so desperately

35:15

seeking? Well, it makes me think

35:19

of what's popping for me because

35:19

I'm reading the Christ letters

35:21

right now. Oh, yeah. And they

35:21

talk about the kingdom of heaven

35:24

in the kingdom of God. And I

35:24

think that the more I

35:27

understand, like, exactly what

35:27

you're saying, like you, you're

35:30

looking for something, a place a

35:30

destination, to feel better.

35:34

What if the kingdom of God or

35:34

the kingdom of heaven is with us

35:37

at all the times like, and he

35:37

came back from the desert 40

35:40

days when he was trying to share

35:40

what he learned that's, that's

35:43

what I believe he had learned.

35:43

Now he wasn't Christ. And until

35:46

that happened, right, he was

35:46

Yahshua Ben Joseph, and then

35:49

goes in the desert and has this

35:49

big awakening, a huge awaken the

35:53

awakening was from within the

35:53

kingdom of heaven was from

35:55

within. Yeah. And that's where

35:55

I, the more I, I think you asked

36:00

me in the very beginning was on

36:00

my relationship with God

36:02

changed? I would say more so in

36:02

the last like year, maybe two

36:07

years than it ever has. Numerous

36:07

Oh, yeah. And it's that that

36:12

kingdom of heaven piece, that is

36:12

really what we believe, and you

36:17

can call it whatever you want, right? All the answers are within. There's nothing outside

36:19

of us. That's going to get us

36:23

right, what is going to come

36:23

from within Yeah, I mean, even

36:26

healers, or teachers, or

36:26

whoever, like they're all there

36:29

to assist us, they're guides,

36:29

their guides, and if we're

36:32

giving our power away, then

36:32

you're defeating the point. And

36:36

you know, on this topic, please,

36:36

please please, for the love of

36:39

God, find someone that has done

36:39

their work so they are not

36:42

healing and not teaching you

36:42

from a wounded place. That is

36:46

popping so much up in my world

36:46

lately that it's it's really

36:49

important because when you go

36:49

and seek out a healer or seek

36:53

out someone, if you're in a

36:53

really low place, or a very

36:57

vulnerable place, you are so

36:57

impressionable to anything this

37:01

person says. And so if you're

37:01

attracting someone and you know,

37:04

at the same time, everything's

37:04

perfect. But if you're just

37:07

going to someone to go to

37:07

someone, just be careful, just

37:10

be cautious and use. Just Just use your best

37:13

judgment. I guess. There are a

37:17

lot of healers, quote, unquote,

37:17

healers, I don't know coaches,

37:21

that are teaching and speaking

37:21

and healing from a wounded

37:24

state, meaning they have not

37:24

completely healed that thing

37:27

that they're teaching. Well, on

37:27

any healer that I've been to, in

37:32

my experience, the great ones,

37:32

they're not there to fix

37:34

anything for you. They're there

37:34

to hold space with what they

37:37

know, whatever that technique or

37:37

therapeutic process is. They're

37:43

holding space for you to go

37:43

within. Yeah, like any good

37:47

healer coach therapist, that's

37:47

what they're there to do, how

37:50

they're not there. I mean, even

37:50

my husband who does Reiki people

37:54

are like oh, you're a healer?

37:54

No. And I really struggled with

37:57

that or the healer. Your body

37:57

knows what it needs to do my job

38:01

is to hold space for you. I

38:01

mean, I'm a healer also not for

38:05

me not I'm not here to heal you

38:05

I'm not here to like and I also

38:09

believe like speaking of Christ,

38:09

like he may have laid his hands

38:13

on people and cured them but I

38:13

really believe I think they How

38:17

do I say they had to have faith

38:17

and actually they had faith they

38:21

believed they chose in that that

38:21

could be a place of healing

38:25

Yeah. And so they matched his

38:25

frequency they matched his

38:28

vibration so they have

38:28

themselves healed themselves he

38:32

held space for them to do that

38:32

and he was holding that higher

38:35

state exactly so that's what I

38:35

I'm watching the chosen I don't

38:39

know if you guys have watched I

38:39

started I really enjoy it and

38:43

there's some things you know, I

38:43

don't I wish they would play

38:45

Mary and Jesus a little bit more

38:45

but you know, in the scriptural

38:48

context and there were talks

38:48

about marine Jesus actually in a

38:50

relationship but it's a really beautiful thing

38:51

and that's one thing that I how

38:54

they portrayed all that and my

38:54

belief system is the same thing

38:57

like he held that knowing that

38:57

you could heal anything it's

39:00

alchemy really of the body that

39:00

we all have the power to think

39:04

you know, we've talked about

39:04

this before as he said, You

39:08

know, this can you do and then

39:08

some is like he was just here to

39:11

be a wayshower. And that's what

39:11

we all are doing. If we're out

39:14

there trying to do our the best

39:14

that we can for ourselves

39:17

because we're desiring to seek

39:17

more than we get to assist

39:20

others in that same path and be

39:20

a guide away shore,

39:24

being our Christ selves, be

39:24

Christ, like right now live from

39:27

a place of Christ consciousness,

39:27

and then you are the wayshower.

39:31

And you get permission for

39:31

people to do the same. And tell

39:33

me how much gratitude is in that

39:33

space. Oh, immense. gratitude.

39:38

Now, comments?

39:42

Well, I don't think I ever thought you

39:46

and I would be talking about

39:48

Christ on this podcast. I was I

39:48

didn't even think I'd be talking

39:51

about leaving religion on

39:51

another podcast and all of that,

39:53

but I'm just sitting here going

39:53

is this interesting? Never say

39:57

you just never know. I think

39:57

that's one of the most beautiful

39:59

things About our life is allowing for

40:00

that unfolding. Because some of

40:04

the greatest moments in my life

40:04

were things I could have never

40:06

predicted ever, or planned on

40:06

or, you know, I agree, I agree.

40:13

Or if you had an expectation you

40:13

let go, and you surrendered and

40:17

guess what, usually it's better

40:17

when you could have ever

40:21

expected it to be when I've

40:21

often thought about that,

40:23

because if we're this whole

40:23

surrender piece, how do we you

40:26

know, if we're, we should have

40:26

goals, we should have something

40:29

that we're charting towards. And

40:29

the way that my mind has kind of

40:33

made sense of it is I can put a

40:33

goal out there, and it's this or

40:36

something better. And then I let

40:36

go, when I start working towards

40:39

that, I mean, I'm not going to

40:39

sit on my ass doing anything and

40:41

expect it to magically appear.

40:41

That's not going to happen.

40:45

Because again, we create a

40:45

realities, and we're co creating

40:48

with God. So then I get to

40:48

surrender and go, okay, and this

40:51

or something better, this or

40:51

something better.

40:56

So true. I love that co creating

40:56

with God peace, too. That's such

40:59

a profound because a lot of

40:59

people think, well, they can co

41:01

create with our relationships

41:01

and the only other humans in

41:04

their life. Yes. And if you're feeling like you don't

41:07

have a co creative relationship,

41:09

or marriage, or whatever that

41:09

is, you can always have a co

41:13

creative relationship with God.

41:13

Yeah, yep.

41:16

Yes. And if you struggle with

41:16

having a co creative

41:19

relationship with God, then it's

41:19

probably time to go look at what

41:22

that relationship is. You know,

41:22

what? What is the dynamic? Where

41:26

did I? Oh, Holly, she was

41:26

sharing on her podcast that we

41:30

did on the other. On my other

41:30

podcast. She was talking about

41:34

how the way that people view God

41:34

is the way they view love. And

41:39

they've never heard that it

41:39

makes so much sense. So if you

41:41

think God is conditional and

41:41

limiting in his in his how he

41:45

gives, well, that's actually how

41:45

you'll also view and receive

41:48

love. I totally believe that I

41:49

actually live that I've never

41:53

heard of explain that right? I'm

41:53

like family that's Yeah, well,

41:57

yeah, you should listen to her

41:57

at her episode was really

41:59

beautiful. But yeah, fascinating times

42:01

we're living in I, I kind of see

42:05

gratitude and love, like on the

42:05

same vibration like they live on

42:07

the same channel. Yeah. So maybe

42:07

people don't like the word

42:10

gratitude will then exchange it

42:10

for love. Yeah. Are you living

42:13

from a place of love, maybe

42:13

coming from a place of love, and

42:16

empathy. I had this.

42:19

This is hitting a few different

42:19

memories, but a friend of ours,

42:23

Mike and my spacing his name.

42:23

Anyway, he did a video not that

42:26

long ago that he said he had

42:26

received this guy, you know, a

42:30

spirit came to him. And he was

42:30

having a conversation. And he

42:33

said, What is the greatest thing

42:33

that all humans desire? And he

42:35

said, Well, it's love and the

42:35

spirit responded, no, it's

42:37

peace. And it's like, you know

42:37

what, that is true. I don't, I

42:41

would have responded. Same thing

42:41

with love, because love to my

42:44

belief, love is the foundation

42:44

of all things. And you can't

42:46

have gratitude without love or

42:46

love without gratitude. Like

42:49

they do go hand in hand. But

42:49

underneath all of that, it is

42:53

peace. That is what we're all

42:53

seeking for n in peace is

42:57

simplicity. Why? It's funny that you say

42:59

that, because that's actually a

43:01

question that I asked my kids if

43:01

they're really feeling stressed

43:04

about something, or even myself,

43:04

like, if you're in a situation,

43:06

I don't know what to do. You're

43:06

you're confronted with a choice.

43:10

I say, Well, what brings you

43:10

peace? Now? What brings you

43:14

peace? Not what would bring the

43:14

other person peace that you're

43:17

dealing with? Like what brings

43:17

you peace? And if we come from

43:19

within, and we bring peace to

43:19

ourselves, then that's who we're

43:23

responsible for? Yeah. Yes. And

43:23

I would ask in tandem with that,

43:28

because sometimes, what makes us

43:28

feel better or more at peace is

43:31

not doing something. And that's

43:31

not necessarily the answer. This

43:35

is something I've learned,

43:35

right? Cuz I'm I was really,

43:38

really good at not showing up

43:38

when I said I was going to do

43:41

something because I would start

43:41

feeling overwhelmed or anyway,

43:44

it would just trigger on my own

43:44

things. And then it was like,

43:46

Well, I'm just not supposed to

43:46

do this like that. This must be

43:48

the answer that I'm not supposed to do, because it feels a lot more peaceful to not do anything

43:50

else. Take this off my plate.

43:53

Yeah. And I've done that many

43:53

times. And I have since then

43:57

learned that usually it's those

43:57

places that are uncomfortable,

44:00

because it's asking us to grow

44:00

and stretch. And we get to lean

44:04

into that. And I love that

44:04

question. I mean, I think that's

44:08

still a very relevant question.

44:08

And I think a secondary question

44:10

to at what would be well, I feel peace on the other

44:13

side of this, if I, you know,

44:18

because that is something that

44:18

again, is human nature, we'd

44:21

rather just, no, I don't want to

44:21

do that. Well, I think a lot of

44:25

times people think about being

44:25

uncomfortable. We're all

44:28

vulnerable. They have to do it

44:28

publicly. That's not true,

44:30

either. being uncomfortable,

44:30

vulnerable, yes. If you want to

44:33

go to the next step, and you

44:33

want to act on something, then

44:36

yes, but not always. Sometimes

44:36

those uncomfortable moments are

44:39

vulnerable moments. They're

44:39

private, that you're, you're

44:44

recognizing something, an action

44:44

that

44:47

maybe something you've been doing with all your relationships, it's not serving

44:49

you and you're just seeing in

44:51

your own place. This is not

44:51

serving me anymore, right?

44:54

You're being vulnerable in and

44:54

of yourself to admit that I

44:57

gotta stop this habit. I got to

44:57

stop

45:00

This reaction I gotta stop this

45:00

fill in the blank that is not

45:04

something you have to share with

45:04

the world that is between you

45:07

and God are you and your higher

45:07

self whoever Yeah, I think

45:10

people incorporate being

45:10

vulnerable or uncomfortable as

45:14

making it public and I just

45:14

don't think that's always the

45:17

case i think that each their own

45:17

right some people are a little

45:20

different than others. But um

45:20

yeah, I think teach their own

45:31

awkward silence. I think we've covered all the things one

45:34

you're doing are you doing a

45:37

freebie or a course what are you

45:37

doing with gratitude? I have a

45:41

seven day freebie Oh awesome

45:41

that I'm just launching right

45:45

now take it's called the seven

45:45

day gratitude experience I love

45:48

and then if they love that they

45:48

can opt in to the 21 day

45:50

gratitude journey. And well

45:50

that's that's a paid piece. And

45:53

then they for 21 days. They do

45:53

we do reflective questions and

45:58

journal and and then what's

45:58

after that will either be

46:02

working with me one on one, or a

46:02

group? All those things are

46:06

still kind of coming to

46:06

fruition. And it's devenish

46:10

duo.com sevenish duo.com with

46:10

ease DeVonish with two Yes. No

46:16

show notes, I think Yeah, yeah.

46:16

And you your retreat. By the

46:20

time this podcast release,

46:20

you'll be retreat. Yeah, but

46:23

you're always doing a treat

46:23

twice a year, right. Actually,

46:26

by the time this podcast release

46:26

will be Monday and we'll be

46:29

retreating Wednesday night and

46:29

this this retreat for some odd

46:32

reason. We still have a few

46:32

spots open. So Wow. Usually a

46:37

minute call. Yeah, I don't like

46:37

I told you before. I don't think

46:40

we'll do October. Again. This is

46:40

like a very odd time of year.

46:44

But we'll be down in Springdale,

46:44

Utah, which is the heart of

46:47

mouth Zions, and this retreat is

46:47

very different. In fact, the

46:50

people that are coming are a lot

46:50

more beginner into all of this.

46:55

And it definitely feels more of

46:55

like a really nourishing

46:59

space where some retreats in my

46:59

experience from ones I've

47:04

facilitated and gone to some

47:04

retreats are very challenging

47:07

because the whole time you're

47:07

looking at your shed and other

47:11

ones are a little bit more

47:11

gentle and this one feels this

47:15

one's a little bit more on the

47:15

gentle side and enjoying and

47:20

yeah, gentle just is the word

47:20

that keeps coming. So if you're

47:23

feeling a last minute call,

47:23

Amanda joy Loveland, calm. She's

47:28

come Holly and I love doing

47:28

retreats together. We're really

47:30

good at it. Actually, you guys

47:30

really are both you guys both

47:33

have your unique gifts that you

47:33

bring to the table. And then

47:36

together, it's like a whole

47:36

nother what's so experienced.

47:39

What's so funny about this is

47:39

like when you look at astrology,

47:42

and like numerology, and all of

47:42

that. So what Holly is, is what

47:46

my husband is and what her

47:46

husband is, is what I am. So

47:49

it's so funny that it's like,

47:49

well, of course, because her

47:52

health, her relationships

47:52

healthy, my relationship is

47:54

healthy. So it's make sense that

47:54

her and I would do well

47:57

together. But yeah, we're very

47:57

different. And then very

48:00

similar. Sounds kind of fun. I

48:00

love it. It's just fun. Well, I

48:04

love the one we went to in the

48:04

spring was beautiful.

48:08

And your favorite part was I loved all the meditations.

48:10

That was one of my favorite What

48:13

was your least favorite part? Oh, god, I'm asking this

48:15

question I do. I can't think of anything that

48:18

was a least favorite part.

48:22

Honestly, no hooks in the

48:22

bathroom that has been remedied.

48:25

Yes. I don't need to poke in the

48:25

bathroom for my towel. That's

48:29

been Dang it, I took care of

48:29

that, hey, well, then there you

48:31

go. Other things have been solved? I

48:33

really can't think of anything.

48:38

I think my own personal struggle

48:38

is just the

48:41

maybe Is it the implementation

48:41

or the what's the word how to

48:45

take the things and apply it in

48:45

your life? The implementation,

48:49

the just, yeah, just living from

48:49

that place, taking those aha

48:53

moments that you get at a

48:53

retreat, and then bringing them

48:56

into your everyday life. I for

48:56

me, as I've looked back, it's

48:59

like I can you have those aha is

48:59

that start stacking on each

49:02

other, you know what I mean?

49:02

It's like, wow, this led to this

49:05

that led to this that led to

49:05

this. And you can kind of see

49:08

how all the dots, dots

49:08

connected. And I think

49:11

ultimately, because all of us

49:11

are seeking for that place of

49:15

peace when you're in a space

49:15

like that when you're stepping

49:17

outside of your everyday norm

49:17

and you're allowing yourself

49:20

that time and space to be with

49:20

you for you for your own

49:24

personal growth and healing.

49:24

There's something that just it's

49:27

magical and it's powerful in in

49:27

the ripple effect that it has.

49:31

And that the opportunity to just

49:31

really sentence in in that space

49:35

and feel peace because I know I

49:35

don't know if you notice but

49:38

that location down there is just

49:38

the setting alone is just

49:42

spectacular. And healing and

49:42

energizing and both the House

49:48

and just being in Xi'an. Right

49:48

did the hike and all that, too.

49:51

Yeah. Right. So I mean, I think

49:51

absolutely, yeah, I think

49:55

there's just bringing it back

49:55

and and I think really we're all

49:59

masterpieces. All peacemakers, right? So

50:00

there's just dots and pieces of

50:03

the puzzle to our life that

50:03

we're connecting in the creating

50:06

this. And you know, we're

50:06

spending the edges sometimes and

50:09

making the puzzle that much

50:09

bigger. Even if we do feel

50:11

whole. Yeah, maybe we're adding

50:11

some exterior layers. Usually

50:15

when we add the exterior layers,

50:15

and we're expanding, that's when

50:18

all of our circuits were will

50:18

start glitching. Just you know,

50:21

if you don't know this, I'm

50:21

letting you know.

50:24

I've had lots of glitches, are

50:24

you kidding me? Oh, yeah. And I

50:27

wish we were coming. But I

50:27

anyone that goes or is even if

50:32

you're listening to this, and

50:32

you thought about it, you should

50:34

absolutely pull the trigger.

50:34

Yeah, cuz they are awesome. And

50:38

I'm surprised you even have some

50:38

spots. So I know we even have a

50:42

well, I know, right? so bizarre.

50:42

I don't know about you. But have

50:46

you been noticing time shifting?

50:46

Like I feel like things are

50:49

starting to flip, there's a

50:49

switch flipped? Have you felt

50:52

that? Absolutely, there is a

50:52

shift that has taken place, I

50:55

feel like we've hit the tipping

50:55

point. And now it started gonna

50:58

start going the other way. And I

50:58

can be totally wrong. As I'm

51:01

saying that it feels like

51:01

there's still a few pieces that

51:04

are gonna hit us a little harsh,

51:04

but especially like when we're I

51:08

mean, here, I'm going on a

51:08

tangent for a minute, but since

51:11

we're the pilots that are, oh,

51:11

they're starting to on strike.

51:15

And I was watching this video

51:15

about this woman that has our,

51:19

you know, she's at the airport

51:19

is crazy long, because there's

51:21

not very many employees there.

51:21

And I mean, there's so many more

51:25

people that are that are

51:25

standing up for their rights and

51:28

for our rights than we're

51:28

seeing. So I'm growing, you

51:31

know, what I'm seeing, you know,

51:31

that's what I'm really grateful

51:34

for that people are sharing that

51:34

they're at the airport and

51:36

waiting. And they're grateful

51:36

that they are showing these more

51:40

these videos are standing at the

51:40

airport, they've been on hold

51:42

with Southwest Airlines for five

51:42

hours and 53 minutes, this

51:45

woman, wow. And she's videoing

51:45

herself. And she's posting this

51:50

and she says, I'm in so much

51:50

gratitude, that people are

51:52

choosing their own sovereignty,

51:52

even though I want to be home.

51:55

And this is inconvenient for me.

51:55

And I'm frustrated, because I've

51:58

been a loyal airline. Through

51:58

Southwest my whole life, I'm

52:02

frustrated, this is happening.

52:02

And I see you, I hear you, I'm

52:07

grateful for you. And I can see

52:07

that you're standing in your

52:10

sovereignty. So that's, I think

52:10

that's where most gratitude

52:13

pieces, that's where the shift

52:13

is happening in the world. And

52:16

in just this consciousness of

52:16

gratitude of just Hey, this is

52:19

ugly and hard, and I don't love

52:19

it. And thank you. And that

52:23

again, that kind of I mean, we've touched on that this entire episode, but especially

52:25

with the world stage when you

52:28

can find gratitude and what is

52:28

transpiring? And what will come

52:31

out of this. That's where you're

52:31

not set. Yeah, like, it's not so

52:36

daunting. It's not so heavy, and

52:36

there's not that fear place,

52:38

because it's all it is 100% all

52:38

serving. It's serving. I agree.

52:44

I have people that we've talked

52:44

about a lot of this conspiracy

52:47

theory time, whatever is going

52:47

on in the world, hey, what do

52:49

you think of this? And they're

52:49

always like, I did not think you

52:52

were gonna say that you love it,

52:52

or that you're excited about it,

52:54

or whatever. I thought you're

52:54

gonna say, Oh, this is it. We're

52:57

screwed. The ship's going down.

52:57

I'm like, I don't I've never

53:00

seen it that way. Yeah. I really

53:00

believe that. And I believe this

53:04

just with life in general, but

53:04

all of the constructs so if we

53:06

want change all of the

53:06

constructs that we know have to

53:09

crumble, and how are you going

53:09

to have to be torn massive

53:12

constructs, that there isn't massive drama? You know, or some sort of event

53:15

that happens? Yeah, I mean, even

53:19

even in tarot cards, if you pull

53:19

like, Is it the tower card?

53:22

Yeah, yeah, that means like your

53:22

foundation, I think a lot of

53:25

people are like, even falling

53:25

off. There's fired, but I pulled

53:28

that card once and I'm like,

53:28

shit. It's like, no, this is

53:31

really good thing. Yeah, with

53:31

death comes rebirth. You know,

53:35

and if we have to, I was talking

53:35

to my son about this. And that's

53:38

a whole other story. But if we

53:38

have to sacrifice not traveling

53:42

right now for a year, two years,

53:42

so that, you know, our world is

53:45

overall a better place for our

53:45

children and our children's

53:47

children. It is so worth it in

53:47

my book. You know, absolutely. I

53:53

love the I love the message that

53:53

the pilots are sending and the

53:56

videos that I've seen that, hey,

53:56

you know, this is this is

53:59

affecting not us. Not only us,

53:59

but our children and our

54:03

children's children. When you're

54:03

having surgeons that are

54:05

refusing to operate on people

54:05

that do not have the vaccine.

54:09

This I mean, that is a huge

54:09

problem, a huge problem. And we

54:12

were taking away people's rights

54:12

and like that one video that

54:15

you're talking about, where it's

54:15

like when I have to choose

54:18

whether I'm going to be able to

54:18

put food on my table or do

54:21

something that I don't agree

54:21

with. It's like, what is America

54:24

freedom? Yeah, what is the

54:24

America that we're, this isn't

54:27

America, this is the New World

54:27

Order that's trying to come in.

54:29

That's what's happening in

54:29

Australia. And we're not going

54:32

to be Australia. It won't

54:32

happen.

54:36

And it's ugly as all of it's

54:36

been I'm so grateful that it's

54:38

happening. Because even from my

54:38

own perspective, where I started

54:41

in January 2020, the Jessica

54:41

that I was then and what I

54:44

thought I knew about the world

54:44

we live in it is inherently

54:48

different. We're even talking

54:48

about the god connection. You

54:51

cannot tell me that this hasn't

54:51

propelled most of us to really

54:55

reflect on what do we believe in

54:55

and what do we stand for, which

54:58

would then go into what are called Politics is like we to share it

55:00

on that other episode. What even

55:02

is socialism and Marxism and all

55:02

that? And what is my

55:05

relationship with God? Because

55:05

I'm not quite sure. Yeah. And

55:09

that in itself, that right there

55:09

in itself, oh my gosh, what do I

55:13

really believe? And how do I see

55:13

the world? And how do I make a

55:16

difference? Right? Even just one

55:16

little Jessica in the world? How

55:19

do I make a difference? Yeah,

55:19

it's that ripple effect. It's

55:21

that energetic feeling that we put out into the

55:24

world. And then that touches the

55:26

other person and the other

55:26

person and we just the power to

55:29

influence is just magnetic and

55:29

magnificent, and it's just

55:33

reaching. Well, if you look at

55:33

us, like I remember reading a

55:37

book years ago that was talking

55:37

about, you know, the end of the

55:39

world was supposed to happen in 2012, right, because that was all it was all the Mayan

55:41

calendars and all this thing. And it was predicted by a lot of

55:44

people and I remember reading a

55:46

book that was talking about how

55:46

if you were to look at us

55:49

humans, like a grid, and that a

55:49

grid system that's on the

55:53

planet, and what started

55:53

happening is people started

55:56

waking up so they'd be start

55:56

started becoming more heart

55:58

centered, which would be from a

55:58

place of gratitude, and they

56:01

would literally illuminate in

56:01

that grid. And so that's what

56:05

you're talking about when we

56:05

start moving into this God

56:07

centered, heart centered

56:07

gratitude type place of living,

56:10

we start lighting up the grid

56:10

and when we light up the grid it

56:14

goes out and then allows for

56:14

that same availability to happen

56:18

to other people that's partly

56:18

why Jesus came to go and be an

56:21

example but also to help light

56:21

up the grid Hey, you guys are

56:25

more more than just this life

56:25

and there's not at the time that

56:29

he came nobody believed in life

56:29

after death they didn't know

56:31

what they believed and now all

56:31

of a sudden opens up this whole

56:34

world that there's something

56:34

more you know and that's what we

56:38

get to do in our little

56:38

individual worlds of I just get

56:42

to keep doing the best that I

56:42

can do with my life and feeling

56:46

called to do whatever it is

56:46

yeah, and leaning in and being

56:49

vulnerable and authentic least

56:49

that's me for sure me too and

56:53

being the person that like

56:53

lights up a room like we all if

56:57

you if you think of somebody in

56:57

your life that every time you

56:59

see them they light up a room or

56:59

something in you ignites or they

57:03

change the energy of the space

57:03

we know who a person a name

57:06

comes to mind right? What if we

57:06

are that person what if that is

57:10

the best we can do is that we

57:10

shine up we show up as that

57:14

light we shine that light in the

57:14

every room that we're in whether

57:17

it's the grocery store whether

57:17

it's at the gas station, whether

57:19

it's at your business or your

57:19

home What if you just didn't

57:24

change anything at all? Except

57:24

that one thing that you you were

57:28

that person Yeah, you came from

57:28

a place of gratitude you shine

57:31

your light you were kind you

57:31

were empathetic you were

57:33

graceful. And you just showed up

57:33

as that light even if you don't

57:36

see that light anywhere in your

57:36

field. If you become the light

57:40

then that in and of itself is

57:40

how the world shifts and how the

57:42

world changes. Yeah, so I think

57:42

we are shifting because more

57:46

more people are standing up for

57:46

what they believe they know what

57:50

they believe even me. I know

57:50

what I believe more now than I

57:53

did Oh 100% a year almost. I

57:53

mean it's almost been two years

57:57

if that's so crazy. Yes. Yeah,

57:57

yeah, yeah, I mean, I i

58:01

understand more of my personal

58:01

sovereignty, and I thought I was

58:04

a very what's the word already

58:07

sovereign already? Yeah, I

58:09

already knew who I was. I

58:09

already knew what I was here to

58:12

do. Or maybe what my gifts were

58:12

my brilliance or what I wanted.

58:15

But now more than ever, I know

58:15

what my voice is and what it

58:19

needs to be. Doesn't it feel so

58:19

much? Um, it's, for me it's so

58:23

much more personal. I don't know

58:23

how it's like all of these

58:27

things that we're talking about

58:27

are so deeply entrenched within

58:30

my being it's not something

58:30

that's outside of me it is it is

58:33

who I am. And I think that's

58:33

what the shift is that you're

58:36

speaking to I don't know if

58:36

that's how you feel as well but

58:38

it sure and that's exactly why I

58:38

mean you would think this was

58:41

planned out that's exactly why

58:41

the name of this podcast is that

58:44

Yeah, what is personal is

58:44

universal because it is so

58:47

personal. Everything we're

58:47

experiencing is so personal

58:50

that's why people are so moved

58:50

no matter what side you're on.

58:55

It's a personal choice and

58:55

that's where people are so

58:57

standing in their power no

58:57

matter what side you're on,

58:59

because it is personal. It's

58:59

it's affected them in a personal

59:03

way. Yeah. So everyone's

59:03

standing in their own personal

59:06

sovereignty now so it is more

59:06

personal and it what is personal

59:10

is universal because we're all like my thoughts, right? Yeah, it just

59:13

magnifies that Yeah, I love

59:17

them. Anyway, it's powerful and

59:17

that's the thing even in these

59:20

things that we're talking about that are simple, they're so powerful. Be a light you know,

59:22

if you don't know how to be a

59:25

light, actually just Sundays be

59:25

in the sun every day and ask the

59:30

sun to help illuminate the light

59:30

that's within

59:33

let's start doing that and then

59:33

start smiling at people making

59:37

eye contact with people just

59:37

being kind

59:42

I know of that and of all of

59:42

this Alibaba beings I know it's

59:46

hard because I'm sitting here

59:46

I'm like, Oh, I'm gonna miss

59:48

this maybe I can be a guest

59:48

every once in a while your

59:50

podcast I would love that. So no one everyone's gonna if

59:53

they want to. If they want more

59:55

of Amanda they have to go to her

59:55

other podcast leaving religion.

59:58

You know what's fun about that. It's not as much the leaving

1:00:00

religion, it's more what they've

1:00:02

grown. And it's what we're

1:00:02

thinking about. Yeah. These

1:00:06

personal relationships with God

1:00:06

that I mean and their stories of

1:00:09

just what they went through.

1:00:09

That's probably my favorite

1:00:11

thing about your podcast and the

1:00:11

people you interview is everyone

1:00:14

has a story, whether it's

1:00:14

leaving a religion or whatever,

1:00:17

it's where they are now, what's

1:00:17

come from that loss, for lack of

1:00:21

a better word now, right through

1:00:21

through the loss or through the

1:00:24

sadness, or through whatever it

1:00:24

is that they have experienced,

1:00:27

that you've interviewed. It's

1:00:27

what they found now. Oh, that's

1:00:29

my favorite part. Yeah, I yeah,

1:00:29

like we talked about, you never

1:00:34

know. You never know. And this

1:00:34

is one of those things I didn't

1:00:36

know and where it's going. And

1:00:36

like I didn't, it's stunning to

1:00:40

sit here and be in the space

1:00:40

with these guests. And there is

1:00:44

I mean, it's beautiful. You never know who thought I was

1:00:46

gonna do a podcast by myself.

1:00:49

And that'll be next to I'm not

1:00:49

surprised. Hopefully, they stick

1:00:54

around. Oh, of course they will.

1:00:54

I think you're gonna you're

1:00:57

always doing something amazing.

1:00:57

So thank you. Thank you for

1:01:01

inviting me to be on the

1:01:01

podcast. And thanks for showing

1:01:03

up and being my, my person I get

1:01:03

to see every week. I know. I'm

1:01:07

like, You're gonna miss me.

1:01:07

You're gonna miss me too. I

1:01:10

don't have to try to you're not

1:01:10

gonna miss the hour drive. I

1:01:13

probably won't miss the hour drive? No, probably not. But I have

1:01:16

appreciated everything about

1:01:20

you. So thank you for your

1:01:20

friendship and your light. And

1:01:22

just everything that's not all

1:01:22

going. That's not going away

1:01:25

just this for a minute for

1:01:25

today. But there's that

1:01:27

intentional piece where we

1:01:27

choose to spend an hour a week

1:01:30

together. Yeah, that will

1:01:30

inherently change a little bit.

1:01:34

Maybe not much. I know. Yeah.

1:01:34

Thank you. Thank you. And thanks

1:01:39

to all of you all for supporting

1:01:39

us and continue to support

1:01:42

Jessica, because I know they

1:01:42

will. And so it is and so it is.

1:01:49

Thank you for joining the

1:01:49

conversation today. We hope that

1:01:52

something we said sparked your

1:01:52

curiosity to further your

1:01:54

growth. Only you know what is

1:01:54

meant for you. So let's continue

1:01:58

the conversation and follow us

1:01:58

on our Facebook page at what is

1:02:01

personal is universal. We'll see

1:02:01

you there.