0:01

Wind down with trailer and Michael

0:04

Colin and I'm her radio podcast.

0:06

We have two more

0:08

days until we're free. But

0:12

as you're saying earlier, well,

0:15

no, they don't know what I was saying earlier affair,

0:18

it's going quick offair, it

0:21

was like doom and gloom, and

0:23

I'm like, what do you mean we're doing

0:25

this? Once? We said the first three days

0:28

were really hard, and

0:30

then it was like we need to,

0:32

like because I was talking to my friend pamelin back home and

0:36

I said, once we set a schedule

0:38

for each day, like, it just helps everything.

0:40

I think it helps my anxiety too. I'm like, okay, I know from

0:43

ten to eleven we're outside, eleven to twelve is lunchs

0:46

goes down, you know. And I

0:48

feel like it's made the days go by

0:50

a lot faster. It has what I'm

0:52

realizing, or

0:55

my tape job on my headphones, it's coming off.

0:57

What is going on. What I'm

1:00

realizing is I'm like, why does this feel so different

1:02

because we've spent so much the last year like not leaving,

1:04

not doing anything. But I'm like, well,

1:06

last year we could still technically leave

1:08

the house, Like I still went to the grocery

1:11

store and you went to home

1:13

depot. I'm like, honey, is that essential going

1:15

down She's like building

1:17

this thing for the kids. Absolutely? Absolutely,

1:20

And but I'm like, now, these two

1:22

weeks, we weren't allowed to go anywhere.

1:25

I mean, it's not it's not a

1:28

recommended, it's a you're staying

1:30

or you'll go to jail for six

1:32

months. It's like, if we want to run

1:35

the risk I'm

1:37

dying. Do you drink some money? Oh

1:41

my consus Okay,

1:45

yeah, we run the risk of someone actually

1:47

coming to the house and doing like a house call and checking

1:50

if we're here. Yeah. Oh

1:52

which, sorry, that just scared me. I'm like, I think

1:54

they just showed up. That's your wardrobe

1:56

guy. Um

1:58

so yeah, it's it's been in that

2:01

part. That part it was what was giving me anxaetty.

2:03

But at the same time, there's people online that were

2:05

like stopped complaining, like we're all in a pandemic

2:08

right now, We're all can't we all can't leave. And I'm like,

2:10

that's technically now,

2:12

I mean in California you can't really, but you're

2:14

still go somewhere, right, No

2:16

one, here's the thing again, here's the difference. No

2:18

one's gonna possibly show up at your door to make

2:20

sure you're at home. You have the freedom to

2:23

leave. Yeah, in theory, we

2:25

could, but we run the risk of getting like a

2:27

set dollar fine

2:29

or possible imprisonment. I really don't

2:31

want to do that. No, and we've already

2:34

done it like we're used to. I think what I said

2:36

to someone, I was like, honestly, it's just about the

2:38

comfort of your own home. Yeah.

2:42

Um, I know we talked about that last week, but I

2:44

uh, yeah, I feel like wherever I

2:47

am with y'all is home. All.

2:49

We do a good job at making that happen for

2:51

ourselves and for the kids. And I'm sorry

2:53

to Pete that was where the heart is. But Wednesday,

2:56

we're going to the zoo. I got us lined

2:58

up to go to the vank Uber Zoo on

3:00

Wednesday, nice little tour.

3:04

I'm like, well, if you know, it's so

3:06

ironically sad about that. I

3:08

just thought of it. This is terrible. We're

3:11

free that day, but the

3:14

animals are not free, you

3:17

know. We're like,

3:20

we're basically the caged animals right now.

3:23

So what you're saying when we get to the zoo and we're casts

3:25

a lion we're free. No,

3:28

but I feel bad. No, but

3:30

I genuinely feel bad now Now I get

3:32

it, like I'm a we're zoo

3:34

goers. We are, we are, and

3:37

now I'm oh my god. They lived

3:39

that life every day. They can't roam free.

3:41

They can't. I feel terrible

3:44

all of a sudden become a non zoo goer. Peter,

3:47

Yeah, I feel terrible

3:49

now after we got to Banco, Yeah, after, because

3:51

I need to get out. Um.

3:53

So we celebrated Valentine's Day

3:56

and lockdown quarantine

3:59

and we made the most of it. Last

4:01

Valentine's Day, we were also well,

4:05

it was pretty much like well, we weren't locked down yet

4:07

because that was March. But we spend it at home.

4:10

Remember, we made homemade pasta and we

4:12

ended up having to so

4:15

last Valentine's Day, Mike

4:18

was really wanting wanting it to be special

4:20

because we just kind of went through a little thing

4:22

last January, and

4:24

and he was just he was putting so much pressure

4:27

to make homemade

4:31

and basically it ended up looking

4:33

like yogurt.

4:35

Well, no, I just I second

4:37

guest myself because I was going by this recipe in the resciper

4:40

was like, oh, basically you don't have

4:42

to boil the pasta before

4:44

you put it in the pot with the sauce. I was like, what

4:46

that doesn't make freaking sense. But all right,

4:48

like who am I to say otherwise? And

4:51

then it's just like Doughey limp noodles.

4:55

So it wasn't it was one big ball. Yeah,

4:58

it was like noodles. The noodles back

5:00

to their home, which became one big ball of dough over

5:02

those things that my grandma used to make dumplings,

5:05

dumplings. It looked like one big dumpling. Yeah.

5:07

So we ended up ordering food.

5:10

No, we ended up making well yeah,

5:12

so yeah, we ended up making or do we

5:14

end up ordering from a place in Nashville. But this so this

5:16

Valentine's Day, I was like, bab let's just get

5:19

pre made noodles, let's

5:21

get some fasta sauce, and you're lucky

5:23

we're not at home. I'll totally try to redo it and

5:25

do it right this time. But it was great,

5:28

a little bath, a little It

5:32

was a good day. I wonder

5:35

though, because a lot of people don't like

5:37

to celebrate Valentin's Day because

5:39

they called like a hallmark holiday it is.

5:42

I mean, well,

5:44

then what's Mother's Day

5:46

to appreciate mother's Well, then what's Valentine's

5:49

Day? A day to appreciate your look for

5:51

making money for all these companies Christmas.

5:54

Remember we learned about Christmas what Christmas was

5:57

when we were watching the Scrooge

6:00

and we looked up when did Christmas actually start?

6:02

And was to make money for

6:05

the company's Remember

6:08

when we looked that up. So it's like the same thing. I mean,

6:10

it's all essentially the same. Well, no, we

6:12

our question was when did Christmas

6:14

become commercialized? Right? But it

6:16

became commercialized because of the money

6:19

and right, but there's still

6:22

you know, the wise men brought gifts. Why are

6:24

men so against Valentine's Day?

6:27

Like you're fighting valid? Because here's the deal. Here's

6:30

the deal. It's not really a if

6:32

you say here's the deal twice or like more serious,

6:35

No, if I say it three times and I'm really serious. So here's the

6:37

deal. It's

6:42

they don't put a name on it, and it's in terms

6:44

of Mother's Day or Father's Day where it's one specific

6:46

person. Right, But the

6:48

way society has been it puts

6:50

the pressure on the mail two

6:54

have a you know, give a great

6:57

gesture of love. And

6:59

the women just naturally or the receivers

7:01

of that. And it's like, wait

7:03

a second. You get your birthday, you get

7:06

Mother's Day if your mother, we get Christmas

7:08

anniversaries. You're telling me that

7:10

we have to take another day out of a month

7:12

and say, hey, honey, here's all this stuff

7:14

to show that I love you. People have to be money.

7:16

You could just write a nice handwritten card

7:19

and say I really value and love you and

7:21

you're my Valentine.

7:24

Yes, I've never asked for any gift

7:27

on Valentine's The only reason why you got me last year

7:29

because you ruined Christmas and got me a bid day

7:31

for Christmas. Right, some

7:34

cultures, that's a win. Mark.

7:37

Can you back me up on this? Do you feel more pressure that's

7:41

next for you? Do you feel

7:43

more pressure as a male for Valentine's

7:45

Day? I do. First of all, I'm very

7:47

much enjoying the show. I was muted, but I was laughing out

7:49

loud, So I just wanted you guys to know that. Um,

7:52

I think that they're all Hallmark holidays.

7:54

All holidays are made up, so I don't see

7:56

why one is more than the other. So I don't know that

7:58

I can go with you on that, Michael. No

8:01

one really knows when Jesus was born. They just

8:03

picked a day. But um,

8:07

yes, there's a lot of pressure. And I have an issue

8:09

because my wife's birthday is two weeks before Valentine's

8:11

Day and it's all right after Christmas. It was like three

8:13

bam bam bament. So I gotta plot it out. I gotta start

8:15

planning, and I gotta, like, you know, I have a list in my

8:17

notes section on my phone reckon, like organize

8:20

what goes to what birthday and what goes to Valentine's

8:22

Day and what goes to Christmas. Otherwise I'm gonna be out of luck.

8:25

Welcome to being a woman. We have that, I have like

8:27

the whole year planned out, like Father's

8:30

Day, this, that his birthday. I mean, that's just what

8:32

a woman does. And I'm proud of you that you even have

8:34

that because I have to be like Mike, write

8:37

it down. I would like it. The last

8:39

time I did that, I got her a day and she hated

8:41

it because I didn't ask for it. You kid,

8:43

Oh my god. I literally said, we're

8:46

going to go back to you, Mark, But I know joke. We

8:48

were at a friend's house, and I was like, oh, this warm

8:51

seat feels really nice, said

8:54

as my main gift for Christmas, you're

8:58

driving pick and cheese. It

9:00

was just the warmth of the sea. It wasn't that I

9:02

don't like. I don't even use the spritzer. I

9:05

don't use the spritzer. I just like a heated seat.

9:07

I like it. I like I like a good old

9:09

heated seat. But I didn't want it for Christmas.

9:12

And so the only a lot of money on that with

9:14

Mike, I don't know, because

9:16

then I ended up paying having to pay for it a

9:18

double down this last Christmas to it needed

9:20

to be spectacular and

9:23

I killed it. So it's okay. But

9:25

that's the thing. And this is what I told him, because we actually got

9:27

into a huge fight about it because he's like, I

9:29

was like, you, what you don't get and what you're missing

9:32

is that it doesn't matter how much

9:34

you spend. I mean, sure, diamonds are

9:36

great. Every woman loves diamonds. I was

9:38

like, it's the intention, the intent

9:40

and the intention behind the gift. He got me

9:42

this thing from probably

9:46

uncommon goods. It probably was like maybe

9:48

a hundred bucks, and it was

9:50

the most thoughtful gift

9:53

I've ever gotten from him. It was like it was a Chicago

9:55

map where we met. It was like a little heart pin

9:58

and it was just like, Wow, that's

10:00

so sweet, and I'm like, I love that

10:02

more than the diamond this

10:05

you gave to me that I wear once, you know. So

10:07

it's truly for women.

10:09

It's about the intention, and I think going back to Valentine's

10:11

Day, it's just about appreciation and

10:13

telling that person you appreciate them and that you love them.

10:15

That you don't have to do grand gestures.

10:18

But sure, I'm so sorry that we get

10:20

four things out of the year to show

10:22

that it should be every day day.

10:26

Of course, that's my point. Well, the defense

10:28

rest No, no, no, you're no no.

10:31

What I'm saying is like we should have we

10:33

should have every day. You should show us that you appreciate

10:35

and love us and write little sweet notes. But can

10:38

you at least do four out of sixty five

10:40

or however many days there are in a year. We don't

10:42

get actually better when we do more than that, Sure

10:45

you do, we're a lot softer

10:47

and nicer. What are you laughing at,

10:49

Mark? I'm

10:52

just enjoying this. This is I mean,

10:55

could you make really good points. You both make a

10:57

really good point, you know, Mark, I'm gonna put that to

10:59

the test in the year where

11:01

Valentine's or you already did Valentine's

11:03

and I had no choice but to be just sentimental

11:06

and cheap. But moving forward to Mother's

11:08

Day, birthday, anniversary

11:11

saying you have to be I'm just saying,

11:13

like there's I'm gonna go super

11:16

inexpensive and just sentimental. And

11:19

you guess what one of those days is gonna be a

11:21

lottery pick where she's going to get the grand slam

11:23

of no material gift. All

11:25

she's gonna get is eye contact, intentional

11:27

words. I'm saying, honey, I love appreciate

11:30

you so much, and that'll

11:33

be your gift. It's got to be written down, like

11:35

you sound kind of like you sound kind of arrogant

11:38

right now, Like you gotta at least like like I said, frame

11:40

it, you know, and I did that and it was amazing.

11:42

It was my favorite gift. And I still haven't.

11:44

You just said, you said, how do I sound arrogant?

11:46

Well, you just sound kind of like like we don't

11:48

deserve I'm gonna write something down

11:51

and make a card. I'm not saying that

11:53

that's part of it. I'm saying, if you really

11:56

think there's no material

11:58

isn't behind it For Valentine's

12:00

Day? No, I don't think so. For a birthday,

12:03

and for Christmas? Yeah, I think you know something

12:05

nice, you know, if that's what we agree on. If

12:07

not for like, hey let's just do the deck next year, then

12:10

we agree on it. But I'm not that

12:12

girl to say I want a deck for Christmas,

12:14

you know, like most couples say, like, that's our

12:16

couch. I don't want a couch for

12:19

Christmas, you know what I mean. I would

12:21

like a nice pair of shoes. I

12:23

don't want to be like, well, well we had we spent

12:25

a lot of money on the couch this year. When

12:29

you buy yourself ten guns, you

12:31

know. Anyways, my

12:34

I rest my case, and now

12:36

we're gonna get comments of how materialistic and

12:40

whatever we are. I

12:42

think you make a good point. I think it's a combination. It's

12:45

got to be sentimental, but gifts are

12:47

nice. Everyone loves getting gifts. Valentine's

12:50

Day, Birthday, Mother's Day, the four days a year, right,

12:52

he's got to come strong him, I agree, and I got it

12:54

to Guys have to step up. I think that's

12:56

the message. Yeah, and that's thing. I have no issue

12:59

with it. It's m I

13:02

don't it sounds like you have an issue, like you get four

13:04

days out of you. Where

13:06

I have the issue is when at

13:09

times women will say, oh,

13:12

it's not about this, it's not about that. I just want to know I'm

13:14

appreciated, no,

13:16

no matter what it is. And or

13:19

even we even said who is it? Your

13:21

brother? Your brother and his fiancee.

13:23

They even said, hey, don't get it. Don't She even

13:25

said, don't get me a gift and he said, okay.

13:28

In the day, come he didn't get her a gift, she said, And

13:30

she got him with she said, what the where's my gift?

13:32

He said, you told me not to get you a gift. Well, that's

13:34

different. I've never told you not to get me something.

13:37

I agree. I'm not saying you have I'm

13:39

just saying women in general, this,

13:42

Yeah, that is a thing out there where.

13:44

If men, if you and I agreed, hey, let's not get any

13:46

any you know, get each other anything for Christmas.

13:49

As a guy, I'll be like, okay, we're not getting each

13:51

other anything for Christmas. You knowing you, you'd

13:53

probably still get me something. Of course I would

13:55

because I appreciate you. That's

13:58

the thing. It's about appreciate and being like I

14:00

appreciate you. Whether it's five or

14:03

five bucks, I app's showing

14:05

appreciation. But what if we agreed

14:07

not to get I

14:10

still think you still get something small. I'm

14:13

sorry, I just think it's I think it's appreciated,

14:17

and it is totally. But a girl

14:19

wants to feel validated

14:21

and appreciated and loved. And

14:24

God, we do so much, like

14:26

we do, we do so much, and we

14:29

all we get our four days, so

14:33

I only get three yor not? A mom

14:36

you know, well two

14:39

weeks their own. I would like

14:41

to start throwing myself. Half birthday is now just approve,

14:43

just to prove my point of appreciation.

14:48

We're going to celebrate my half birthday. Bring

14:50

it. I'm ready, all right, Mike

14:53

intro, our amazing guest for today. All

14:55

right, speaking of doing too much, this is a lady that knows

14:57

how to do too much successfully, Miss

14:59

new Cole Walters. She was a former

15:02

employee for Fortune

15:05

company, decided to leave that company

15:07

and start, you know, her own business and became the

15:09

CEO and founder of her business, which

15:12

is called an Inherent Learning company, um,

15:14

you know, and that she specializes in uh

15:16

business development training, strategic coaching

15:19

for emerging entrepreneurs and established

15:21

business owners. So we're gonna have her on and

15:23

let her teach us all about that and pick her

15:25

brain. Yeah, they also have a show her

15:28

and her family. She's um called she's

15:30

the boss on USA right, and

15:33

the girls that she has they're actually

15:35

adopted. So I'm excited to hear about that story.

15:37

And then I also want to ask her to she

15:39

quit her job on like

15:42

online basically I mean in front of people, Yeah,

15:44

just in front of curious

15:47

to ask her that. So, um, we'll

15:50

take one more break and then we'll get her on. Hello.

16:05

Hi, I'm so sorry we made you wait Okay,

16:09

I apologize. I apologize,

16:11

I apologize, don't be,

16:13

don't even. I'm the person who's like, please don't

16:15

send me gifts because I'll never send you thank you notes. Just

16:19

let's just own who we are. It's a pandemic.

16:21

Collect it's fine, you know, it's

16:24

so funny about and

16:26

we can just let's just go right into it. But thank you

16:28

cards. I'm terrible with thank

16:30

you cards? Yes, I

16:32

like, can I just text you them?

16:35

Anymore. No, that's the thing like kid's birthday

16:37

parties. I'm like, I don't have the time. I feel thanks

16:40

for the unicorn for my daughter, right

16:42

right exactly. I'm always like, why are you even

16:44

putting me in this position? I need thank you cardless

16:47

friendships. I need you to understand I

16:49

don't want that pressure, you know, because

16:51

it's it's the layers to a thank you card. It's

16:53

I need stamps. I have to get to

16:55

a post office by stamps.

16:58

Like what is that? Well, and here's

17:00

the thing too with that is I'm like, when

17:02

I get a thank you card, it doesn't do anything

17:04

for me, you know. So I'm like, I

17:07

just I personally, I'm like, well, of course you're

17:10

thankful that I you know, like you don't need I'm like,

17:12

I'm always and I say to my friends, like, you don't need

17:14

to write a thank you card? Like do not write a thank you card?

17:16

Yes, it's pressure because I'm like and I'm

17:18

like, it's just wasteless and like I got time to I got

17:20

to open it up. I compare it to

17:23

ringing the doorbell, right. I always make the joke like if you

17:25

bring our doorbell, that means you don't belong here.

17:29

You walk in. You either know the code

17:31

or you just walk

17:32

so we're

17:34

not friends. You don't know what's exactly

17:36

right. It's like, honestly, whenever I get a card,

17:39

I kind of recondo it. I'm like, I

17:41

hold it to my heart and I'm like, Okay, sentiment

17:43

received, and then I throw it in the trash,

17:45

Like what am I supposed to do with this thing? You

17:47

know? I got it. I know

17:49

we're getting super off topic, but it's

17:51

kind of the same thing. Even like

17:54

I love doing the Christmas cards, but we don't

17:56

have anywhere to put them, so I just feel bad like

17:58

putting people in a drawer, do

18:00

you know what I mean? Like their whole family

18:02

in the drawer, every single piece of it. Yeah,

18:05

that's the one that even this past year, I was like,

18:07

Genna, we need like one of those little decorative

18:10

like trees to put on because that's the one. I do feel

18:12

bad because I know we go and actually take these

18:14

pictures and people put effort and paying money to

18:16

have them professionally done right, And so I'm like, I

18:19

don't want to be thrown in a drawer. We pay

18:21

money and take us about it, like I

18:23

have to buy furniture to display your photo at

18:25

this point, Like, I mean, if you don't put

18:27

me in that position, you know what I mean? This is supposed

18:29

to be a relationship of depth, like what are we

18:31

doing second? Virtually where I can

18:33

then add it to a nice little folder, you

18:35

know what I mean, posted on my page, let the

18:37

world know how cute, and then we move

18:40

on with our lives. It's what it

18:42

is. Um, I get it. You guys, get me to

18:44

listen. Thanks for coming on our show

18:47

already. Like you you're just

18:49

I mean, you're a total boss. Can we just

18:52

back up for a second though, because I mean we introd

18:54

you in the very beginning, but you

18:57

quit your job online.

19:00

I did live in front of ten thousand

19:02

people because were you Just like I'm

19:04

done, drop the mic, like what did you? Like? What

19:06

was your classy? Like I was raised right

19:08

just like I don't show people's houses unannounced,

19:11

you know, Like you know, I was like raised

19:13

right now. It was a situation where I

19:15

already had built a place for me to go, so like

19:17

I was going to hire myself, Like I knew that

19:19

I had a thing myself. Yeah,

19:22

I had a plan. So it was really just um,

19:24

I called my boss and I said, hey,

19:26

you know this is at an alignment. You know, I'm

19:29

it was actually people don't know this. It was right

19:31

before a performance review, so like my

19:33

annual performance review. And he was like, oh, I'm

19:35

so excited to talk to you about all the cool new things

19:37

for that coming year. And I was like, pump the brakes

19:40

on that because I'm not going to be here. And

19:43

that was that I might have been. I was in

19:45

your shoes out to wait for the performance review just

19:48

to get that validation right, because you know, you probably killed

19:50

you know, you probably killed it. Like Nicole,

19:53

you are amazing. We can't future

19:55

with you. Thank you so much. By the way,

19:57

I'm out right right right, it's

19:59

like, oh, well, really funny you say that because I'll be transitioning

20:01

all my loggins because yeah, I'm

20:03

not gonna be here, So what made you want

20:06

to do that in front of ten thousand people?

20:08

Like what was that? Wow? The

20:10

incentive? So I mean like, obviously you've

20:12

had the people who are like the flight attendants who like,

20:14

you know, dispatch the emergency

20:17

thing, and it wasn't one of those. Like what

20:19

it was was I've been detailing my journey

20:21

online already, so like people saw me building

20:23

the business and getting clients, and like

20:25

I was already sharing that. And so the truth

20:28

was I wasn't planning on sharing my quick day

20:30

ever, Like that was not a thing. But

20:32

I told everyone, Hey, I'm doing it today.

20:35

I'll be back later to let you know how it

20:37

goes. And everyone was like, no, no, no, no,

20:39

no else, keep us on the line. We've

20:41

been following the journey. We want to watch

20:43

it live. So that's what happened. They end up seeing the whole

20:45

thing. I love that. And

20:49

now you have a show. That's when

20:51

is it airing? It's on USA, right, Yeah, it's

20:53

on USA. It's airing on February

20:56

at ten thirty pm Eastern

20:58

on USA Network. And then you

21:00

have um three three

21:02

kids and they're adopted. We

21:04

read that right, So did you

21:07

did you try to have kids and you

21:09

didn't or was it just adoption? You always wanted

21:12

to do that and that was just your route so

21:14

neither. So, UM, we had pretty

21:16

much said to ourselves, we're not even going to try until

21:18

we're I'm like thirty two. You know, let's

21:20

hang out, let's be married, then you know, get stuff done

21:23

and then um, we actually got our kids

21:25

by We're driving in Baltimore City

21:28

and we met a woman on the side of the street and

21:30

she was panhand I'm so serious, like panhandling

21:34

with her with her three year old and so,

21:36

um we were talking to her and she mentioned she had

21:38

two more kids at home, so we were

21:40

like, well, maybe we can help mentor get

21:42

you guys some groceries. And long story short,

21:45

we found out she was going to jail a year after

21:47

that and are not a year I'm sorry

21:49

a month after that and we said, okay,

21:51

well what's the plan with the kids? And she said I

21:53

don't know, and we said, okay, well we'll take them.

21:56

So from the moment we were on the side

21:58

of the street, thirty days later, we had the

22:00

kids and um, we still have them,

22:02

and now my mom not mentor woe.

22:06

So how old were the three kids? Yeah,

22:09

so we had It was a three year old,

22:11

and eleven year old and a fourteen year old, all

22:13

girls sisters. Oh my goodness,

22:17

Oh no, I'm not. Absolutely I actively

22:19

try to keep them from licking outlet you know, I

22:22

like I criticized even

22:24

the fourteen year old. Right literally, kids are trying

22:26

to kill themselves constantly, and like you know,

22:29

I'm always criticizing their eyebrows because that's like a

22:31

family value. So I'm very

22:34

as a mom. I do the best thing I can. Don't

22:37

like to eat right and make sure your eyebrows are

22:40

you get it? So so you get it clearly?

22:43

Are you? Are you located in Baltimore? No,

22:46

so we moved from Baltimore to Atlanta, Georgia. So

22:48

I'm now like officially Southern. I use y'all

22:50

periodically, you know, are

22:54

you from the Baltimore area? I am

22:56

so like I was born and raised in d C. Went to

22:58

um Hopkins and like you know, my husband's

23:00

University of Maryland, that whole thing. But I'm a

23:02

Southern girl at heart, like entirely

23:05

like love country music, love,

23:07

like like I was the girl at the front

23:10

row of a Chris Young concert in

23:12

Richmond, right, black girl, cowboy hats,

23:14

singing every lyric and people are like, what are you talking about?

23:17

You know, and I'm like, you don't know me. This is my

23:19

life. So give

23:21

our listeners kind of like your elevator pitch

23:23

of of what you have, the business you started and

23:25

created is yeah. So when I quit

23:28

my job, I basically quit because

23:30

what I realized was my friends who were bloggers

23:32

and New York Times bestsellers and on

23:34

TV and all that they were doing a great job

23:36

doing their craft, which was writing books or

23:39

being on TV or writing their blog, but

23:41

they were trash at making money like

23:43

it just they had no corporate skills. They

23:45

and frankly they weren't supposed to be. And

23:47

a lot of people beat themselves up because they're like,

23:49

I don't know how to profit from my skills,

23:51

from my gifts. I just know how to do the thing I do well,

23:54

and I know that I need They're or they're all

23:56

smart enough. Most of us are smart enough to realize

23:58

I need more money coming from different places, but

24:00

we don't know how to do it. So that's what I do.

24:03

I opened up an online school called

24:05

one K One Day Academy, and

24:07

basically that's what I do is I walk people through

24:09

education courses much like college, but it's

24:11

like the stuff you actually need, where I show

24:14

you how to do everything from build an online

24:16

store to sourcing it with products to opening

24:18

up a business bank account, just like the real

24:20

skills you need to have. So that that way, if

24:22

you're an influencer, you're actually getting paid.

24:25

That's awesome. Thanks. It

24:27

makes a lot of sense, it does. It's

24:29

like you know the fact that you know

24:32

it's attainable to you

24:34

know totally. It's helping

24:36

people the steps

24:38

of what they need to do to you know, um,

24:41

forget a hat to get a hat from.

24:43

From a motivational standpoint, let

24:45

me ask this kind of asking for a friend here,

24:47

someone who who wants to start

24:50

you know, more of a passion project

24:52

business. And but

24:54

I find myself where my friend finds themselves,

24:57

Um, questioning, like having days

24:59

where it's like day you're more motivated than other days. You're

25:01

like, are people really going to get this? Do they? Is

25:03

this really something I want to do? You know?

25:06

What what do you tell? You know, your clients

25:08

with people you work with like, yes, believe, could

25:10

continue to believe and get it going. Yeah.

25:13

So I know that for a lot of people. The way my

25:15

brain works as it works corporate style, right, so it's

25:17

more tactical and less emotional.

25:19

But what's great is that translates

25:21

into action. So like odds are

25:23

for you or your friend, like

25:27

you know, it's a situation where I wonder

25:29

if our idea is good enough all The reality is all

25:32

ideas usually have a home. I mean,

25:34

if you think about it, Steve Jobs when

25:36

he held up the iPhone, he didn't invent something new

25:38

phones existed, He just took buttons off of it,

25:40

you know, like little tweaks can make a whole

25:42

new thing. So what I would tell that person is, instead

25:45

of comparing yourself to somebody with big brand

25:47

ideas who super accomplished

25:49

and has already hit a million dollars, just realize

25:52

you can start small, like you literally, just

25:54

launch it small, see how it goes, then

25:56

expand and make it bigger. Oftentimes

25:58

we just say to ourselves in our and it's not going to be successful

26:01

if it doesn't blow up right away. But the reality

26:03

is that's not how and of stuff

26:05

in business doesn't work out that way. Everything starts

26:07

small first. So so odds

26:10

are you can do it. If you think you can get what a

26:12

hundred sales, ten sales, you can probably

26:14

get a million of them. So start small. I

26:17

love it. What's so the

26:19

show that you're doing? What what can people expect

26:21

with that? I mean, especially like you're dynamic

26:24

with your husband and tell us all

26:26

about that. Well, so my husband's

26:28

not a cool kid, right, Like, he doesn't look like this in

26:30

a hat. He's a round Jewish lawyer, kind of shaped like

26:32

a bowling bin. But I'm into that. So it works,

26:34

you know, it's like it works out well, very

26:37

hot. I'm into his brain. So um. So

26:39

that said, our show is a

26:42

little bit of both sides. You know, I'm a working mom,

26:44

right so I'm spending time in the office.

26:46

Um, I'm on stage. I have these top

26:49

celebrity clients. I'm building

26:51

businesses, making a multimillions.

26:54

But then I go home and I can't

26:56

get my kids to shower regularly. You know, I

26:58

can't get them to get their i's together.

27:00

I can't get my you know, eighteen year old to

27:02

move out of my house. You know. I mean, these are all

27:05

the things that every mom deals with. And

27:07

it's hilarious to watch.

27:09

You know, someone who people think as a boss, you know,

27:12

not being charge of anything. So get home and

27:14

just get owned by everybody else totally.

27:17

Ot. I mean I go in and I was

27:19

just joking. Yesterday my nine

27:22

year old comes to me and she's like, so, I have to

27:24

write an article about a famous African

27:26

American for Black History Month.

27:29

And so I'm of course, coughing, like famous,

27:32

I'm black, you

27:36

know. She looks at me and she's like, yeah,

27:38

no, I know, Like I know you're an

27:40

African American, you're you know, but what

27:42

what are you even famous for? Like what would you even

27:45

be famous for? Like she was really

27:47

like in my face, and I was like, you know

27:49

what, it's fine, it's fine. What's famous? She was

27:51

like, well, you don't even have a billboard. Even the kid at the dentist

27:54

has a billboard. I was like, you know what, you

27:56

know what, that's fine. So this

27:58

is what my life is like. It's

28:00

like that, well I can't wait to watch it, just

28:02

to see my future because

28:07

the other day, Jolie just turned five and she's like, I'm

28:09

five, I can do whatever I want. And I'm like, oh god,

28:11

here we go. And that's

28:14

the reality of it. It's like a regular they

28:16

get into this I know, that phase where

28:18

it's like I know things because in their brain

28:21

they've been here forever at this point, like it's

28:23

not a baby is three, you know what I

28:25

mean? A baby is not five. But I'm like, I literally

28:27

was fishing your turns out of the bathtub like

28:29

five minutes ago to ask yesterday.

28:32

Now, all of a sudden, you can do whatever you want. Like, all

28:34

of a sudden, you can do what everyone That's not how that

28:36

goes, Like are you kidding me? But

28:38

you know, it's the joy of parenting. Where

28:41

can our listeners find you? Because I want

28:43

to see more of you two, so you're

28:45

awesome. You can definitely find

28:47

out more at Nicole Walters

28:49

dot com. But I'm all over socialist

28:51

Nicole Walters, and you can listen to my podcast, the Nicole

28:54

Walter's Podcast. Oh my goodness, I

28:56

love you. I'm excited to watch your show. Thanks

28:58

for coming on and um

29:00

yeah, excited too, excited to

29:02

watch the show. It's gonna be awesome. You're the best

29:04

everyone can watch. Februarym

29:08

on USA Network. Thanks Nicole.

29:10

We appreciate a big times. Bye

29:12

bye, Hey

29:25

Mark. Do we have any emails? We

29:28

do. We have some nice emails here and this first one is from

29:30

I believe it's pronounced Janelle j

29:32

E n I L l A Janelle. Recently

29:35

this past summer, my sister opened up to me about

29:37

her marriage and the issues they were struggling with.

29:39

I thought they were making progress. Come

29:41

to find out, over the summer, my brother in law

29:43

said he could not stay in the marriage any longer and left

29:45

her and the two kids at home. He even

29:47

started speaking to another woman, but he didn't see

29:49

anything wrong with that because he was just trying to find himself.

29:52

Long story short, they've been working on

29:54

their marriage. They've began a couple of therapy, he

29:56

stopped speaking to other women, and he moved back

29:58

into the family home. My struggle

30:00

is, how do I move on from the pain

30:02

he caused my sister? How do I move

30:04

on and forgive him for leaving

30:06

his kids and his family and thinking he was

30:09

doing the right thing? Janna, how did

30:11

your family ever forgive Mike? Did

30:13

he ever have a conversation with your family after

30:15

everything that happened between you two. I'll

30:18

go ahead and start with this, Um.

30:22

Yes, I did have

30:24

many conversations with you know, Jane's

30:26

family, pretty much

30:28

everyone in her family at some point,

30:31

and it was very, very difficult.

30:35

Um. But here's the thing,

30:37

and this is what everyone

30:39

in Jana's family told me. When I

30:41

would talk to them about these things, they

30:44

say, look, we're not happy

30:46

about this right now. Obviously we don't improve of what you

30:48

did, Mike. But at the end

30:50

of the day, we love

30:53

Janna, and if Janna chooses

30:55

to love you, then

30:57

we'll choose to love you too.

30:59

Or world used to support her in loving you.

31:02

So they just watch Channa. They

31:04

just observe her. They feed off of her energy.

31:06

They and you know, as

31:08

the time goes and we have more and more moments

31:11

together around the family gets

31:13

more and more comfortable, people realize, hey,

31:16

you know we can do this. We are doing this. Um,

31:20

I don't have to be defined by my past actions,

31:23

and now my relationship with all of them is fantastic,

31:26

probably better than it's ever been, you

31:28

know, from a connected standpoint, Um,

31:30

for sure, with everybody. Um

31:34

So yeah, that's what I would have to say is just

31:37

look at your sister and feed

31:39

off of her energy. And it's

31:42

your job as your as her sister too. Yeah,

31:44

speak your truth, but also to love

31:46

and support her and her decisions.

31:48

And this is what she wants. Then you've

31:50

got to learn to deal with that. Now, if he hasn't

31:53

talked to you, you do have the right

31:55

to talk to him

31:57

about it and express your feelings. Yeah,

32:00

I think you have a right for that. And

32:03

also on the other side of it, he

32:08

didn't do anything directly,

32:10

like, yes, he hurts your sister and

32:12

that's wrong and that's bad,

32:16

but he is not your husband,

32:18

boyfriend, lover, like

32:20

he didn't hurt you. So sometimes

32:23

if you bring in that negative energy

32:26

to your sister, that's

32:31

going to affect

32:33

your sisters thought

32:36

process with things, and that's

32:38

not fair either. Is this making

32:40

sense? Like it it wasn't a personal

32:42

attack towards her, and so to not

32:45

don't take it on as a personal attack,

32:47

right, But it's almost I make up that it's

32:49

almost harder, right because if you're not directly

32:51

affected, you don't have that

32:55

that confusion of but I love

32:57

this person, but they hurt me type

32:59

of inflix like you you know, like maybe

33:01

you have or you've had in the past

33:03

with me where it's like she just sees

33:06

red or she just sees enemy because she wasn't

33:08

directly right, so you

33:11

know, but it's also not her place. It

33:13

doesn't mean she has to go you know, shooting

33:16

from the hip and causing ship.

33:18

But it's almost easier

33:20

to be anger. It's easier for it's

33:22

almost one thousand percent easier for her to be

33:24

angry. But I just want her to remember that,

33:27

you know, the best

33:29

thing you can do for your sister is just show support.

33:32

And also if you have feelings

33:35

and he hasn't talked to you, then be like,

33:37

hey, is it cool if I have a conversation with him,

33:39

because it is a personal thing, it is your sister.

33:41

But I also like try to remember that

33:44

it's not your life. That yes,

33:47

it affected, it's something directly affected,

33:50

directly affected, but it's not you weren't directly

33:52

affected. I

33:54

feel like I'm being insensitive, but I hope you guys know

33:56

what I'm trying to know. It's just being directly versus

33:58

indirectly effective. And end of the day, it's

34:01

not Janelle's life. It's her sister's

34:03

life and decision. So she can

34:05

have her thoughts, she can have her feelings, Janelle

34:08

can she can you

34:10

know, express them in a healthy way. But

34:12

it is her sister's decision. It is her sister's

34:15

life, and you're going to have

34:17

to you know, you don't have to like it, but if

34:19

you want to be comfortable, you're going to have to. You know,

34:21

Like, I'm sure there's plenty of times where my

34:23

mom, you know, did not like Michael, but

34:26

she's still tried, you

34:28

know, when she's still put on the happy face

34:30

because she knew that I needed that of her.

34:33

So now if it continues to happen,

34:36

then of course you have to

34:38

have tough love. If you're like, I can't have

34:40

this in my life anymore, like I you know I have. We

34:42

have a a friend whose

34:44

sister keeps staying in an abusive relationship,

34:47

and she's like, I can't keep watching you go through

34:49

this. That's you know, when it continuously happens,

34:52

that is affecting your life more and you

34:55

sometimes you're like, I can't I can't

34:57

have this. I can't be in front

34:59

of him knowing this is happening. So Mark,

35:01

do you have a Yeah, I'm not even sure this guy

35:04

is that anything wrong at all? We know that they were

35:06

having problems, and we know they split up and

35:08

he moved out. We're not even sure he didn't seem

35:10

to cheat on his wife. Like I think,

35:12

you just got to be nice to him. You've got to follow your sister's

35:14

lead. If she seems good, you're gonna be nice

35:16

to him. You may not mean it, you may not want to, but time

35:19

is going to make it better. That's all you can do for

35:21

sure. Do you have anything else this is

35:23

from Danielle Janna. How

35:26

do you deal with your anxiety and ways

35:29

you cope since the pandemic, I've noticed

35:31

I've been getting more anxiety, and I've been trying

35:33

to find ways to deal with it better. I just

35:35

had my second baby, so I've been home a lot with

35:37

my family and my husband. But I'm longing for

35:39

the days to get back to normalcy, aren't

35:41

we all, Danielle. Yeah,

35:44

I hear you, Danielle. And it's been it's

35:46

been tough. I think what I have to There's

35:48

been a few things that I've done, even

35:50

here in Vancouver, when I started to get anxiety.

35:53

UM. I don't know if

35:55

you're religious, but a lot of times I asked

35:57

for God to take away my anxiety to

36:00

help me with it. I do grounding

36:02

exercises, so, UM,

36:05

I either count um

36:07

five, four, three to one, or I

36:10

literally count my fingers all the way to

36:12

ten. I'll go outside put my feet

36:14

in the grass. US. That's

36:16

a grounding exercise, UM,

36:18

and it just kind of brings your body back

36:20

to reality, back to here, back

36:22

to what's not in

36:25

your brain happening. UM. Also another

36:27

grounding exercises if you're in a room

36:29

listen to things like what's

36:33

something that you notice right now that

36:35

you can hear or that you can see or that you

36:37

can feel, and not again grounds who takes

36:39

you back. Meditation is

36:42

really helpful therapy if

36:44

you do E, M, D R. And it's really good for anxiety

36:47

UM to kind of bring up things that you're

36:51

UM needing to cope with. Maybe that's more trauma

36:53

underneath UM

36:56

and then you know, get

36:58

juju with it and get some oil and lavender

37:00

and yeah, just Danielle, honestly,

37:04

you know, go to Google. Tell someone too, by

37:06

the way, go to Google and just type in

37:09

UM search for like mindfulness exercises

37:12

and that's just a way to again

37:15

kind of like Jana saying, getting grounded, but it's a way

37:17

to take your mind and focus it on things

37:19

are in front of you right in that moment rather

37:22

than things that are outside of your control. And

37:24

just know that I

37:26

was I'm fine, I'm not dying, I

37:28

will be okay. And sometimes

37:31

the best thing that I've ever done for myself

37:33

is when I do have an anxiety attack, I

37:35

say, whoever I'm with right now, I'm having

37:37

an anxiety attack. And the second

37:39

someone comes in and helps me or Mike, and

37:41

he's like, okay, like what you are you? Okay? Like when

37:43

you need sit down? I feel better knowing

37:46

that I'm not alone, So I hope that helps. All

37:49

Right, Well, guys, I'm

37:53

really excited because when we talk

37:55

to them next week, we'll be free. Yeah,

37:57

me too, and the animals will still be stuck

37:59

at this, but we'll go a wave and say

38:01

hi, we'll free them all. Catch

38:04

us on the news. When we frege all the animals, we'll

38:06

be at the Greater Vancouver Zoo letting go of all the monkeys

38:08

and the tigers, and then in prison. So um,

38:11

see you guys next week later