0:01

Welcome to the 13th episode of

0:03

who needs school today. We're going to

0:05

take a little, little twist in our conversation

0:07

and talk about. The first

0:09

educators are parents and the role

0:11

of parenting in education. Our

0:14

guest today is Kerry Cahill

0:17

LaRosa. She has an advanced degree

0:19

in clinical social work is the founder

0:21

of LaRosa parent coach. But

0:23

before we get to our, my chat with her, I

0:26

tell a little story about my

0:28

first educators, my parents in particularly.

0:31

I'm the oldest of six kids and

0:34

we were growing up. Our birthday was a, was

0:36

a big deal and we'd get the one gift

0:38

from mom and dad. That was always

0:40

the big gift. And for my 18th birthday, as I was

0:43

may of my senior year of high school,

0:45

and I was going to head off to Santa Clara for college

0:48

and for my 18th birthday, my mom

0:50

gets me this, this package, they open

0:53

up and of course I'm thinking when I get a car

0:55

or something, And I

0:57

open it up and it's this green

0:59

apron and she's on

1:01

the opposite end of the table for me to

1:04

celebrate my birthday. And she

1:06

says, okay, stand up. I want you to hold it up. So I,

1:08

I hold up the screen apron and she

1:10

stands up and she's wearing her apron. She

1:12

comes around the table and she says, all right, hold

1:14

it up and hold it up in the strings

1:17

in the back of the apron are tiny. I'm thinking,

1:19

man, this is, I mean, come

1:21

on. This is what a weird gift

1:23

for an 18 year old had enough. And

1:26

she comes up and she grabs

1:28

the apron strings and

1:31

takes a pair of scissors out of the pocket of her

1:33

apron. And she cuts

1:36

my apron, spray apron Springs,

1:38

and says you're free to go.

1:42

And so for my 18th birthday, she

1:44

gave me my freedom in

1:46

some respects that made it very helpful to come back.

1:49

Alright, enjoy our conversations with Carrie

1:52

LaRosa. well,

1:54

a warm welcome to Carrie LaRosa

1:56

to who needs school carry. Uh, where does

1:58

this podcast find you?

2:00

Hi, Joe. Thanks so much for having me. I am

2:03

currently in Rockville, Maryland, just outside

2:05

of DC.

2:06

Awesome. Well, thank you so much for, uh, for doing

2:08

this. I really appreciate it. And I thought we'd just

2:10

dive right in and if you could. Talk

2:13

a little bit about what you're doing now and

2:15

your path, to get there and you know, what

2:17

were the experiences and why are you

2:19

doing.

2:21

All right. Well, currently

2:23

I am a parent coach.

2:26

I have a degree in social work and

2:29

what I do is I work with parents

2:31

to understand child development,

2:33

to strengthen their relationships with their

2:35

children and help them

2:38

to raise children who

2:40

are confident, independent,

2:42

and emotionally.

2:45

Hmm. And then, so how

2:47

did how'd you get there? What was your path

2:50

to starting this.

2:53

So I went to social

2:55

work school and there's some background to that,

2:57

which I can share in a moment. Uh,

2:59

and I studied clinical social work with

3:02

children and families. And,

3:04

then I was working with, um,

3:06

children. And, uh, providing

3:09

individual therapy for them. But of

3:11

course, you know, there's the work

3:13

with the parents, right? To, to

3:15

support the therapeutic work and

3:17

to help with the progress in between

3:19

the therapy sessions. And

3:21

what I discovered in

3:24

working with children and families is that there

3:26

was another way, uh, to help. Support

3:30

families. Um, and that was to

3:32

work directly with parents to

3:34

help equip them with the knowledge

3:36

and the skills to be able to

3:39

be the best parent that they could be for

3:41

their specific child. And

3:43

so I started my own business and gradually that

3:45

became, um, the work

3:47

that I have been continuing to

3:49

do for over 10 years.

3:52

And I bet there's no, no lack of work. I mean, we

3:54

always talk about parents as being the first teachers

3:57

and, um, there's certainly

3:59

a lot about parenting

4:01

and over-parenting, and probably a lot of

4:03

anxiety about what parents should do and love

4:06

for you to talk to talk to that in a minute.

4:08

But before that, I just want to peel back a little

4:10

bit. What, you know, what prompted

4:12

you to do this? What is this something you thought about

4:14

when you were growing up in school

4:17

or did something inspire

4:19

you to do.

4:21

So I've always been interested in

4:23

and helping people and, um,

4:25

kind of how the mind works. And, but

4:28

I went to say nations S I

4:31

as you know, and the

4:34

part of SSI, one of the reasons I love

4:36

it so much is that there's an aspect

4:38

of character development. It's not just academics.

4:41

It is about how do you support,

4:44

you know, the development of the. Person.

4:47

And part of that was our encouragement

4:50

to think empathically about other

4:52

people, people who are struggling, people

4:54

who are challenged and

4:56

you know, to be people,

4:59

it was for others and then was changed

5:01

to with others. So you're working together

5:04

to. Move forward

5:06

to make progress, to gain those skills that you need

5:08

to do to have to be successful.

5:11

And so that kind of started

5:14

the bug for me of

5:16

thinking about what careers

5:18

I could have, what I could do that

5:21

would, where I could be a professional

5:23

and still work with people

5:25

and advocate for them and support them.

5:28

And I went to the Jesuit volunteer

5:31

Corps which led me down a path

5:33

of doing, um, paralegal

5:35

work for nonprofits. And,

5:38

um, what I found through that work

5:40

was that people kept coming in with a sort

5:42

of saying. Underlying

5:45

issues that kept getting them trapped in the legal system.

5:47

And so I decided

5:49

that I was gonna go to social work

5:51

school to learn more about

5:53

the systems and

5:56

the issues that people face that,

5:58

um, continuing to sort of trap them

6:00

and create barriers to. Being

6:03

successful and making progress

6:05

and being independent. And, I've

6:08

always loved children and have a passion

6:10

for children and child development. And

6:13

so that's why I chose

6:15

to, to focus on clinical work

6:17

with children and families. So a long, long

6:19

road, but

6:21

yeah, but it sounds like you, you know, you really

6:23

paid attention to you know, to some societal

6:26

needs. And gifts that you

6:28

have that could help improve

6:31

the lives of the people that you're dealing with. Now,

6:34

I know that this is a kind of morphed

6:36

into really focusing on parents and

6:38

how they, you know, how they parent and,

6:40

um, we've all been parented, right?

6:43

Some, some fashion or another.

6:45

And certainly, I think a lot of us have opinions

6:47

about parenting. But it's no secret

6:50

that in today's world there's

6:52

a L there's a lot of, um, lack

6:55

of a better word over-parenting or whatnot. I think

6:57

I may have shared with

7:00

you before the story of my son

7:02

was going to be a freshman at Gonzaga university.

7:05

And they told a story about this girl

7:07

who wandered into the housing office and said, Hey, can

7:09

I change my room? And they're like, well, we know. And

7:12

she said, uh, well, my, my roommate's

7:15

mother has been living with us for six weeks

7:17

and sleeping on the floor and getting up every

7:20

morning and taking her to class as a college

7:22

freshman. So it just seemed,

7:24

you know, it's obviously a bit extreme and

7:26

yet there's something there's

7:28

some drive that parents have to

7:30

do that. Absolutely. What

7:33

do you, what do you see in your work with

7:35

parents? You know, what are some of the major. Um,

7:38

themes trends, uh,

7:40

concerns or opportunities.

7:44

Yeah. So I, that is

7:46

an extreme example, but you're right. It,

7:48

it happens. And the

7:50

question I would have is whose need is

7:52

that being filled there is that the parents

7:55

need is that the child's need, and it

7:57

might be a little bit of both, either way,

7:59

not a healthy situation. Right. And

8:01

the reality of it is, is that there are so many.

8:04

Societal stress and

8:06

perceived kind of fear

8:09

about these terrible things that are

8:11

going to come in the future and how terrible our

8:13

world is right now that

8:15

it creates so much fear and anxiety on the part

8:18

of parents and concern

8:21

that if we don't step in as parents,

8:23

if we don't sort of shift

8:25

and drive and shape how our

8:27

kids learn and

8:30

Do sports and extracurriculars.

8:32

If we don't drive them down the right path, they're

8:34

never going to get there and they won't be

8:36

successful and they won't be

8:38

able to go to that top college and they won't

8:40

get that good job. Uh,

8:43

and that's a lot, that's

8:45

a lot of pressure on

8:47

a parent.

8:49

It's a lot of designing, right. You're really trying to

8:51

design the kid in

8:53

and know, create a pathway for their experience.

8:56

So how do you address.

8:59

Well, so let's, let's talk about

9:01

what happens when you parent

9:04

from a place of fear and anxiety.

9:06

What ends up happening is when we

9:08

are feeling anxious and stressed

9:11

or fearful, Are

9:13

Roger. Roger are logical

9:16

and rational. Part of our brain is not working very

9:18

well. It's not functioning. Uh, and

9:20

so when we parent from that

9:22

place of fear and anxiety, we

9:25

are not making good

9:27

parenting choices. We

9:29

also then create fearful

9:33

and anxious children. And

9:35

we really prevent

9:37

them from being able to develop the very

9:39

skills that they need to be successful, which

9:41

is to be self-driven

9:44

intrinsically motivated, emotionally

9:46

intelligent, resourceful, independent, and

9:49

have confidence. And

9:51

it's this tough situation and tough

9:53

balance of when do you support, when

9:56

do you step back? When do

9:58

you let them make a mistake? Learn

10:01

how to recover from that mistake. When

10:04

you know that back and forth, that constant

10:06

sort of tension around, when do you step

10:09

in, when do you support? When do you let them figure

10:11

it out on their own? And that's not easy and

10:13

it's going to be different at each developmental

10:15

stage of course, and a little different depending

10:17

on the child. But

10:19

I think being able to reflect as a parent, what

10:22

is driving my decision to

10:25

force my kid to. Do

10:28

the swim team or to

10:31

get this tutor, what

10:33

am, what is the intention behind

10:35

this? Is this something they really need? Or is this a need

10:38

that I have mine

10:41

or a need that I feel like they

10:43

shouldn't have?

10:45

How, and, and how do you find

10:47

the parents you work with to be receptive?

10:51

Or is there this kind of deep seated

10:53

resistance? You're like they hear you, but

10:55

don't really listen. You know,

10:57

how, how has that kind of message.

11:00

I think it's really hard to

11:03

buy into that idea. It's it's it

11:05

feels like a risk, right? If we

11:07

don't try to control what's happening,

11:10

we're leaving it up to chance. And

11:13

so being able to,

11:15

uh, Give parents

11:17

sort of the information and knowledge

11:19

about how things actually

11:22

turn out when you use these strategies or

11:24

parents from a place of fear and anxiety to

11:26

be able to, to give them opportunities to

11:29

learn from parents, who've gone through it, who

11:31

have let their kids gone down their own path

11:34

and how that worked out for them. And it's not always going

11:36

to work out. But,

11:39

you know, forcing them, pushing

11:41

them, designing

11:43

them, as you say, is not

11:45

necessarily going to work out the way we want anyway.

11:47

And the reality of it is, is that without

11:49

our own passions and, um, Motivation.

11:54

We won't be that successful. Anyway, if somebody

11:57

else is our external driving

11:59

force, well, what happens when that goes away?

12:02

Or what happens if it's

12:04

gets quiet or, uh, what

12:06

happens if you just don't want to listen to that external

12:08

motivation anymore? Right? You need to have

12:10

some of that come from within

12:13

we my wife and I raised three kids

12:15

and other adults, we always felt like our

12:17

job was to. Um,

12:20

get them out of the house so

12:22

that they could get, whether it's go away to college or go, you know,

12:25

go live on their own, but they could, they

12:27

could live on their own, you know, they can handle

12:30

life and be able to take care of themselves.

12:33

Um, and it, there, it was, it

12:35

was a very interesting experience because of

12:37

the external pressures, especially around

12:39

sports. Don't. San

12:42

Francisco bay area and the peninsula it's produced,

12:44

you know, some, the world's best baseball

12:46

players, you know, like Barry bonds

12:49

and whatnot. And there's, uh,

12:51

there's a great knowledge about, um,

12:53

an expertise about baseball and there was

12:55

just so much. Um,

12:58

opportunity and kind of fresher

13:01

for our boys to play on these club baseball

13:04

teams. And because you felt

13:06

your, you were like afraid that if you

13:08

didn't give them that opportunity, they may not

13:10

reach their fullest potential. Now,

13:13

um, for us, that blew up. I

13:15

remember vividly a Sunday night, November,

13:18

late November. My son was playing at a baseball

13:20

tournament down a local, uh, local

13:23

place. And they're in the championship on a Sunday night,

13:25

it was like eight 30. We

13:27

were freezing. And

13:30

I just sat there thinking this is,

13:33

I want to be home with my family, having dinner and

13:35

relaxing on a Sunday night and spent

13:37

all day at this baseball park. And I'm thinking, who

13:40

do you have to blame for that? That's your own

13:42

fault. And so after that, we

13:44

just put a kibosh on anything

13:46

that wasn't really in season. Yeah. Also,

13:49

I think part of it is the,

13:51

uh, uh, fame

13:54

and attraction of, uh, what pro athletes

13:56

might, you know, uh, offer.

13:58

And there's just such a lure.

14:01

And I, I, you know, kind of thought back

14:03

to that and I thought, do I

14:06

really wish that on my

14:07

kid.

14:09

You know, to have that kind of of fame

14:11

and attention. I don't know

14:13

if that's exactly what I'd want for my

14:15

kid. Anyway, I digress because

14:18

parenting is,

14:19

so I have to say

14:22

that I, my husband, I had been struggling

14:24

with. Recently as the kids

14:26

get older and people start moving into

14:28

these travel teams and what's best

14:30

for our kids and our family too,

14:33

you know, is this just because everybody

14:35

else is doing it? And again, this

14:37

fear parenting out of the fear that

14:40

if I don't sign my kid up for this, what's

14:42

going to happen to their soccer career. You know, my

14:44

nine-year-old soccer career what's going

14:46

to happen. If I, you know, do.

14:49

Sign her up for this, you know, $4,000

14:52

a year travel team. Well,

14:55

you know, I've decided that I'm

14:57

willing to take the chance. I want soccer

14:59

to be fun, and I

15:02

want baseball for my son to be fun.

15:04

And hopefully they'll find their own drive

15:06

and passion to. Work hard

15:08

at it or not. That's okay.

15:11

It's really, you know, it, it can impact

15:13

the family both financially and time-wise

15:16

when you push, if the

15:18

children aren't really driving

15:20

it. And it's

15:22

not always the best thing. And then there's burnout

15:25

sometimes as well.

15:27

I, I found out what to be one of the

15:29

fascinating lessons and perhaps

15:31

blessings of this, you know, COVID

15:34

experience that we. In the past

15:36

18 to 19 months, especially

15:38

when things really shut down. There

15:40

were some weekends where we had nothing

15:43

to do. And, um,

15:45

I can't remember that last time that happened.

15:48

And it was took a little getting

15:50

used to, but there, it was also

15:53

very refreshing. It was there. It was.

15:56

Recreational recreation, you know,

15:59

really got a chance to relax

16:01

it. And so we've been kind of conscious

16:03

of trying to build in time like

16:05

that. Almost schedule it so that you have,

16:08

you don't have it, overly planned

16:12

for children. Sorry,

16:14

but no, go ahead.

16:16

I think it's so good for children,

16:18

you know, both young and older

16:22

and adults too, quite frankly, to have that

16:24

downtime, they were uncomfortable

16:26

with it at first, but then, you

16:28

know, my kids ended up doing things that they

16:30

had never felt like they had time

16:32

for, or just didn't even think

16:35

about because their days were

16:37

so planned out and structured,

16:39

but they. We're building,

16:42

you know, forts in the woods and

16:44

going on bike rides and, you know, doing

16:47

things that they just don't normally get

16:49

too much of an opportunity to do. And thankfully, some

16:51

of that has continued. But

16:54

kids need to figure out what to

16:56

do when there's downtime. You know,

16:58

they need to rest. They need to. I have

17:00

some time to think for themselves and have

17:02

quiet thoughts, um,

17:04

and learn how to play right. And not

17:06

have that design for them. Right.

17:09

And that's the whole idea and

17:11

art of play is so important. Let's

17:14

circle back real quick on the sports thing that

17:16

you mentioned. Cause we've been through that. Right.

17:18

And, uh, you

17:21

may or may not know, but my, I had a son

17:23

that played college football and then he spent the last four

17:25

years. On and off, uh, practice

17:27

squads and the NFL he's, you know, he's a high level

17:30

athletes trying to play tight end.

17:33

And, um, he may, you

17:35

know, I, I always say that he's probably gonna curse

17:37

me on my grave when I died. Cause we, when

17:39

he was in high school and had

17:42

a desire to play in college,

17:44

we did nothing. Like we didn't hire

17:46

anybody, didn't do anything.

17:49

And all I said to him is if you're going to do

17:51

this, you got it. Because

17:53

to play something like

17:55

that in college or to higher level

17:58

takes tremendous intrinsic

18:01

desire. Um, and

18:03

he's gotten as far as he's gotten, um,

18:06

he's a good athlete, but he's incredibly focused

18:08

and he had a deep desire to be successful

18:11

and to try it, he wasn't trying to, he wasn't

18:13

doing it for me and I, that

18:15

I thought was important. You know, I could care less.

18:17

I just want him to find something

18:19

that he, um, where he really uses.

18:23

But I thought was that was, um, I think

18:25

helpful for him, you know, to getting

18:28

to where he got, you know,

18:31

and I wonder what would've happened if you

18:33

did try to design that. If instead

18:36

you saw you're really good at football. All right.

18:38

Let's figure out how. How we can

18:41

support you and make you the best player possible.

18:45

W we will never know, but I wonder

18:47

if he would have the same drive or passion,

18:51

my guess would be no,

18:53

because you have. It

18:55

would be you, you guys, as the parents

18:58

would take that over, you would take that

19:00

drive and that passion on, and he

19:02

wouldn't even have the space to develop

19:04

that for himself to think about it, whether

19:06

he wants to do it for himself or not. But

19:09

when you let the kids drive their

19:11

passion, when you let them sort

19:13

of take the lead on some of these

19:15

things, it's

19:17

an opportunity for growth in so many

19:19

different aspects. And also. Helps

19:23

to develop that intrinsic motivation. That is

19:25

really so key to committing

19:27

and to staying focused like your son is doing

19:30

without that. And he probably wouldn't be

19:32

doing what he's doing

19:33

right now. Right. And that we're

19:35

not sure where he is in the, if he's done or if he's going

19:37

to have another option. Um, but

19:39

he really doesn't know what he's going to do after

19:42

this football things over, because he's

19:44

been so focused on it, but I'm not worried about

19:46

because the, the same

19:48

gifts and skills that he applied

19:51

and the discipline and the focus and the effort

19:53

that he applied to doing this will translate

19:55

into whatever he tries to do next.

19:58

And so, and he'll be fine because he's developed

20:00

those kind of internal resilience

20:03

and toughness and skills to, you

20:05

know, to do that.

20:07

Absolutely. And I think that's so key.

20:10

Is that such a good point, Joe,

20:12

is that the, those other

20:14

skills, those social, emotional

20:16

skills, the independence, the drive, the

20:18

focus, they do really translate

20:21

to everything else. And, and we're often

20:23

very focused on sort of the

20:25

obvious skill sets of athleticism or

20:29

arts or academics when

20:31

there are these other social, emotional

20:34

skills that are so critical and. Every

20:36

you do in life, you know, at home, in the community

20:39

at work, um, that

20:41

those, you know, of

20:44

course, I mean, my background is in social

20:46

works. Of course, I'm going to think this way, but the research

20:48

is coming out strong that in fact,

20:51

these social, emotional skills and having emotional

20:53

intelligence is so key to,

20:55

you know, success, whatever that looks

20:58

like in the future.

20:59

Yeah, and those take time and it

21:01

takes time to develop those, those skills

21:03

years of development.

21:06

And they're obviously when they're know kids

21:08

of different ages for, you know, different,

21:10

uh, growth opportunities, um,

21:14

pivot just, uh, just a little bit as

21:17

in ask you as a, as a mom you

21:20

know, school aged kids, as you

21:22

anticipate, they're, um, you

21:25

know, they're going into secondary school

21:27

and, and, you know, hopefully, or probably

21:29

to college beyond that, what

21:31

are you, what are your hopes, you know,

21:34

for their experience in school?

21:36

Like, what do you really want their

21:38

experience to be like in

21:40

school? And basically knowing what you know,

21:43

and doing what you do. What should schools,

21:46

especially high schools, what should

21:48

we be doing?

21:50

Well, I think, you know, my

21:53

kids are very different. I'm sure you having

21:55

three kids that they were all different. They

21:57

learn differently. And I think

21:59

it's so important for.

22:03

Kids to feel like somebody

22:05

sees them for who they are at school.

22:07

Um, that relationship

22:10

in so many aspects of life is so

22:12

key. Um, and particularly

22:15

I think with school, um,

22:17

the relationship that staff

22:19

has with parents and

22:22

that teachers and administrators have

22:24

with students that they make positive

22:26

assumptions about the students and

22:29

that. They truly believe

22:32

that there aren't bad kids,

22:34

but maybe kids who

22:36

make some bad choices at times.

22:39

And, um, that

22:41

they also provide. They're

22:44

not expecting kids to

22:46

always to fit into a box. They allow

22:48

that there's some space. I hope my children

22:50

feel like there's some space for them to be themselves at

22:52

school. Um, that particularly

22:55

as they would move into high school,

22:58

that they feel like there are opportunities

23:00

for them to follow their passions. Whether,

23:02

you know, with the. Some

23:05

hands-on experience, uh,

23:07

some choice in classes,

23:10

um, and

23:12

you know, really being able to have opportunities

23:15

to develop those social,

23:17

emotional skills, being independent so

23:20

that, you know, they are

23:24

expected to,

23:26

they, there are high expectations of them they're

23:29

held accountable and

23:31

that they're also given. Opportunities

23:33

to develop those skills, to recover from mistakes,

23:36

to get the support when they need, uh,

23:38

to follow their passions, to you

23:41

know, advocate for themselves for what they

23:43

may need or want to do. So

23:45

really, you know, to sum that up

23:47

it's about them being able to be themselves

23:49

and have choices and gain,

23:52

you know, the, the social, emotional skills we've been talking

23:55

about and independent. And

23:57

confidence, you know what I mean? Not forget about

23:59

confidence.

24:00

Yeah. And that's, you know, perhaps

24:02

one of the things that was accident during

24:05

uh COVID, you know, we had a

24:07

lot of schools going to re remote learning, which

24:09

we did as well. And

24:11

as technology and the access

24:13

to information has changed over the last

24:15

couple of few decades, we

24:18

realized, I th I think that

24:20

you know, we, we used to see schools as a repository

24:23

of infant. This is where you're going to

24:25

learn and pick stuff up. And

24:28

it doesn't necessarily have

24:30

to do that. We could find that information

24:32

from anywhere and what

24:35

schools, some of the values that

24:37

schools offer is that they are

24:39

a place for socialization. And

24:41

that is so important to human development,

24:44

that they learn the those

24:46

interpersonal relationships and

24:49

social, emotional skills, you

24:51

know, But one of the things

24:53

perhaps highlighted during, uh, during COVID

24:56

any, any other, other thoughts,

24:59

kind of last thoughts on, you

25:01

know, this topic in the, you

25:03

know, the world you've immersed yourself in

25:05

as a parent coach. And as

25:08

it, especially as it pertains to school,

25:10

Yeah. I mean, think one last thing.

25:13

Just kind of piggybacking on what you were just saying,

25:15

that the other

25:17

aspect of wanting,

25:20

you know following the passion, having choice

25:22

and independence, is that

25:24

the reality of it is we can sit down and learn

25:26

something to spit back out on a

25:28

test. Right. But when

25:31

we are interested, when we're

25:33

focused, when we have a passion

25:35

for something. We are able

25:37

to truly learn and develop skills,

25:40

right? So that's why, you know, the two

25:42

year old is able to

25:44

come up with all these. Very

25:47

difficult words for what the

25:50

different dinosaurs are or construction

25:52

vehicles are because they're passionate

25:55

about it. So they want to learn and they immerse themselves

25:57

in it and they read the books and they talk about it.

26:00

And I, you know, that, that doesn't

26:02

stop when we're passionate, what we're interested

26:04

in topic. We are going to absorb

26:07

that information so much better.

26:09

And particularly for feeling that we're

26:11

in a place that is. Safe

26:14

and we are respected and treated

26:16

with respect and, um,

26:18

and that it's a safe learning

26:21

environment where you can make mistakes

26:23

and have the support, or

26:25

at least yeah. Have the support to get back

26:27

up again and learn from them.

26:30

You know, you really touch upon one of the themes

26:32

that has emerged as I've talked to folks

26:34

in this podcast and that's

26:36

the gift and value of curiosity, and

26:39

it's not so much. Designing

26:42

what to learn. Um,

26:45

learning how to learn is important, but,

26:48

you know, somehow designing or inspiring

26:51

this curiosity, because you're

26:53

curious there's, you know, it

26:55

just that perspective of being

26:57

curious as opens up a whole world

27:00

of opportunity and you really I think you

27:02

really touched upon that.

27:04

Yes, absolutely.

27:07

Last bit love to ask if there's

27:09

anything that you'd recommend reading

27:11

wise or something

27:14

to watch, especially if we've got some young

27:16

parents out there that want to raise

27:18

healthy independence, a

27:20

responsible citizen.

27:23

Yes. So a couple things

27:25

check me out on social media

27:27

for online classes and webinars that

27:30

come up. Also some of the

27:32

books that I love permission to feel

27:34

by Marc Brackett. He is the director

27:36

of emotional, the Yale center

27:38

for emotional intelligence the

27:41

self-driven child by

27:43

Ned Johnson and William

27:45

sticks. Rude is excellent.

27:48

It really touches on some of the themes we were talking

27:50

about today about, you know, how do you

27:52

sort of let your child go and make some of those decisions,

27:55

even when it's scary. And then

27:58

if you want to look

28:00

at a really alternative, different perspective on education

28:02

and how children learn Based

28:05

in sort of how they learn naturally and,

28:07

uh, based in child development, anything

28:09

by Peter Gray is great.

28:12

He definitely thinks outside the box. He's

28:14

a little bit about unschooling, but there's a lot of

28:16

nuggets of great information that he

28:18

has about how children really learn.

28:21

And again, sort of tying to these themes of

28:24

developing these social, emotional Skills

28:27

and being becoming self-driven

28:29

and intrinsically motivated. So I would definitely

28:31

check some of his things.

28:34

That's awesome. Those are great recommendations and

28:36

folks can find you, um, it's LaRosa,

28:39

parent coach.com. Is that correct? Correct.

28:42

Yes. Great. And I, and I know you had

28:44

talked about doing some YouTube videos

28:46

and then making some of the work

28:49

that you do a little more. Correct?

28:52

Yes, absolutely. Um,

28:54

COVID has sort of helped me pivot into

28:56

a world of making some of this information

28:58

accessible and affordable, where you

29:00

can listen to, or watch it whenever

29:03

you want. So, you know, check out

29:05

my website, follow me on social media and you'll

29:07

get up to date information on the latest

29:09

and, um, of

29:11

courses. And if there's something that people want to

29:13

learn more about, I am open to it. So

29:16

just shoot me a message.

29:18

That's awesome. Well, I certainly, uh, commend

29:21

you on your, your good work there's perhaps

29:23

no more important thing we do. Uh,

29:25

if we have kids that being parents and

29:27

setting, you know, being the role model for

29:29

them and, uh, helping raise

29:31

them it's a, you know, a very

29:34

important responsibility. Well, Carrie,

29:36

I cannot thank you enough for joining

29:38

us. Just fascinating conversation

29:40

and, and great work. So thank you so much for,

29:43

for being a guest today.

29:44

Thank you so much for having me, Jay. I appreciate

29:46

it.

29:49

Thank you for joining this session of who

29:51

needs school. If you like, what you hear, please

29:53

like us follow us and recommend

29:56

it to your friends. Thank you.