0:34

Welcome in everyone and thank you

0:36

for joining me in a very , very

0:39

special episode of

0:41

Women in the Arena . It

0:43

is my third anniversary

0:46

of this show . I

0:48

started this show on my 49th

0:50

birthday in 2020 , not

0:53

knowing what to expect , and

0:55

I was just simply taking it one

0:58

show at a time , one week at a time

1:01

, to see what would happen . Turns

1:03

out , a lot can happen , and

1:05

that was three years ago , and today

1:08

is a celebration And

1:10

, like the previous two years , this

1:13

episode is very special because

1:15

I am in the hot seat

1:17

. It's the only time of the year that

1:19

I have the microphone turned on me and

1:22

I invite a host to

1:24

grill me with questions . And

1:26

, boy , are you in for it today

1:28

? Maybe I'm the one that's in for it today

1:31

because I have invited my friend

1:33

, lawanna Bradford , because I knew she

1:35

wouldn't let me off the hook , and

1:37

you have met her before . She

1:39

has been on the show two previous

1:41

times , but in the event that

1:43

you haven't been properly introduced

1:46

to her , let me introduce you . Lawanna

1:49

is a force . She

1:52

is a serial entrepreneur , she

1:54

is a visionary leader . She

1:56

is the co-founder of Celebrate You

1:59

, and that is a women's organization

2:01

. She has her own

2:03

TV shows , which she actually has

2:05

three of them where she produces

2:08

, directs and hosts Power

2:10

of the Pen , choose to Challenge and Business

2:14

and Raw Talk , and she

2:16

also is a five-time

2:18

best-selling author

2:21

. Are you guys impressed yet ? Are

2:23

you guys nervous for me ? Because she is

2:25

going ? she is definitely not going

2:27

to let me off the hook , so

2:30

I'm going to bring her on and

2:32

then the show is hers . It

2:34

is my pleasure and my honor

2:36

to introduce to you LaWanna

2:39

Bradford LaWanna , thank

2:42

you so much for being here and welcome

2:44

to the show . I'm a little nervous

2:46

. I'm a little nervous , but it's . The

2:50

mic is yours .

2:52

Well , thank you so very much for

2:55

asking me to host this

2:57

special episode and congratulations

2:59

on your three-year anniversary . That

3:01

is so exciting . And

3:03

, yeah , you're right , i'm putting you in the hot seat

3:06

. Let's

3:08

crank up that furnace a little bit .

3:10

Yep , yep , like I

3:12

said , i knew . I knew I was in for something

3:14

. I have no idea what . Literally

3:17

everyone hold on that . This is

3:19

live . I know zero

3:22

, zero what's coming at me , so it'll

3:24

be fun to listen to me squirm .

3:27

Well , i'll use you into it . Okay

3:31

, so the first question , and for

3:33

I'm certain you have your , your

3:36

past audience , that's listening , your

3:38

followers . But then there's there's new individuals

3:40

that are listening to this episode for the very first time

3:42

, and what I would like to

3:45

know is we

3:47

hear the phrase women in the arena

3:49

, and I'm often very curious

3:52

as to how individuals

3:54

come up with a particular name for

3:56

their business , for their podcast , and this

3:58

is , in fact , is your new

4:01

business . So , when you think about

4:03

women in the arena , two part question

4:05

how did you come up with the name and

4:07

why is it so relevant at this

4:10

point in time ?

4:11

Coming up . The name was really interesting and

4:13

it was and it was accidental . I

4:16

was before , long before

4:18

I even thought about

4:20

having a podcast . I

4:23

was watching a Brene Brown episode

4:25

on show on Netflix

4:28

and she raised

4:30

the quote of man in the arena And

4:32

I went and I looked it up to see what it was

4:34

And of course it is the famous

4:37

Teddy Roosevelt quote . And

4:39

I looked at it and I thought the

4:41

pronouns are wrong . And I had

4:44

a friend . I have a friend who's

4:46

an incredible artist . I sent

4:48

her the quote and I said

4:50

I need you to make me a giant

4:52

plaque because I want to hang it in my

4:54

office , but I need you to fix the pronouns

4:57

because this isn't completely

4:59

correct . So she did that And

5:02

we hung it in my office and it hung

5:04

in my office for probably two years . Like

5:06

I said , long , long before

5:09

I even thought about having a podcast . Then

5:12

, when I decided that

5:14

I was going to do this , i kicked around

5:16

a bunch of names , didn't have any

5:18

idea what I was going to call this , And

5:21

I was pacing back and forth here in my office And

5:24

I was standing there staring into

5:26

space , arms crossed , thinking

5:28

what am I going to do ? And

5:30

my eyes focused and

5:32

saw the plaque hanging on my wall and

5:35

realized I had named it two

5:37

years before I even thought about putting

5:40

together the show And I thought that's

5:42

obvious . That is obvious . So

5:44

that's where it came from . That's where I got the inspiration

5:47

. I got the inspiration before I even

5:49

knew I was going to do this . So

5:51

let me answer the second part . The second

5:54

part is the

5:57

arena of life . We

5:59

are all in this arena of life

6:02

And it

6:04

could be both isolating , but

6:06

it can also be empowering

6:08

, because when you look

6:11

around and you realize

6:13

that you are not alone in this

6:15

arena and

6:17

that you have friends , family

6:20

and individuals that just

6:22

want to see you win and maybe help

6:24

each other win along the way , that

6:27

is what I've visualized for an

6:29

arena , and I do see us all

6:31

as warriors , but warriors

6:34

doing it together .

6:36

I love that . And it's interesting

6:38

, audra , that often , as

6:41

we journey through life , there

6:43

are seeds being sprinkled

6:46

along the way and we don't

6:48

realize their relevance until

6:51

it's the time for them to

6:53

not only germinate but

6:55

to mature , to grow , and

6:58

your harvest , if you will , is

7:01

cultivating the voices

7:03

of women from around the world

7:05

. You said something in your response

7:07

and you used two words that I found quite interesting . You

7:10

said isolating and empowering

7:12

. Tell us

7:14

about a time I'm

7:17

turning up the heat a little bit When

7:21

you were part of a community and

7:25

you come in , you're alpha female

7:27

. You know who you are , you know what you're going

7:29

, you know what you're doing and your value

7:31

. But you shared with me in

7:33

one time that you realize

7:36

that there were some pieces that

7:39

were missing , that you didn't realize

7:41

were missing , and that this

7:44

community helped

7:46

to gird you up in a time

7:48

where you didn't feel isolated

7:50

And through their strength , you

7:52

felt even more empowered . Tell

7:55

us a little bit about that .

7:57

Well , you invited me to your

7:59

community Celebrate You , and

8:01

I had zero idea of

8:04

, first of all , what I was doing there

8:06

, because these women are so

8:08

accomplished in this organization that I was

8:10

like I don't know what you want me there for . But

8:13

okay , i'll go . But

8:15

then I started to realize that these

8:18

women were just like me , even

8:20

though we had different backgrounds and

8:23

we had different accomplishments . They were just

8:25

like me And

8:27

I was having a moment of weakness

8:30

because I , over the past

8:32

year , I have become an empty nester

8:34

And that was a very strange

8:37

transition for me , because

8:39

you are , you're

8:42

pouring yourself into these humans

8:44

for a quarter

8:46

of a century , because my oldest

8:48

is 26 . And suddenly they

8:50

weren't there And I didn't

8:52

know how to feel about

8:54

that And I suddenly felt very alone

8:57

and very sad And

9:00

I came to the , the

9:02

organization , and said I need

9:04

, i need , some words of encouragement

9:07

, because this just feels lonely , this

9:09

feels weird And I don't know

9:11

how to work through this

9:13

. And all these women , many

9:17

of them I have never met in person , many

9:20

of them that I haven't had the pleasure of having

9:22

a conversation with them , and

9:24

this was all through a Facebook conversation

9:27

All came to me and

9:30

surrounded me And

9:32

I do mean surround me , meaning surrounded

9:34

me as in to embrace me and

9:37

lifted me up and said you're not alone

9:39

, what you're feeling is normal

9:41

, and whatever

9:44

you need , we're here . And

9:47

it was at that point that I recognized

9:50

that what

9:53

I thought was a loneliness really

9:55

wasn't It was

9:57

this giant community that

10:00

all I had to do was unlock

10:02

the door and they would walk

10:04

in .

10:06

When you described it that way . It makes

10:09

me think of what we just went

10:11

through last month , which was mental health

10:13

awareness month , and often

10:15

we have misconceptions of what

10:18

is . What is mental health , what is mental

10:20

well-being , or what are things that can put

10:22

us in a state of concern

10:24

, and it could be anxiety

10:27

, right Fear of the unknown and

10:30

just not knowing how to get out of that

10:32

loop of you

10:35

know you're just spiraling , wondering okay

10:37

, what do I do ? This is my new

10:39

normal . How do I show up

10:41

? You know it doesn't feel right

10:44

And I love

10:46

that you shared that experience , because

10:48

women in the arena is

10:51

doing just that . You are showcasing

10:54

in a very protective

10:56

and loving way , the

10:58

voices of women , their lived experiences

11:01

, which , in turn , will

11:03

give people hope and inspiration

11:05

When you think

11:08

about what you're doing . That's

11:10

a pretty weighty call . Why

11:14

are you and I know you're confident

11:16

why are you confident that you're the one

11:18

to make this happen on a global scale ?

11:21

Because I really feel like I was called to

11:23

do it . And I

11:25

had this . I

11:28

had a moment , i had a

11:30

moment where I got

11:32

angry and it was

11:34

. It wasn't

11:36

. There wasn't some big dramatic

11:39

thing that happened . I am a

11:41

female in a male-dominated

11:44

field and you know

11:46

, you've heard all the stories . I don't need

11:48

to go into the details of what it's like

11:50

to be a woman in a male dominated

11:53

field , especially in corporate America , and

11:56

I just finally

11:58

got to the end of what

12:01

I was willing to tolerate And

12:05

I didn't want

12:07

any of the women around me

12:09

to have to feel like they had to tolerate

12:11

it as well . I

12:14

was like I'm done . I'm done putting

12:17

up with this And

12:20

I thought what am I going to do with this anger ? I

12:23

it's , and what I thought

12:25

in a moment of clarity is that anger

12:27

is energy and

12:31

it's not the emotion that

12:34

is important , it's what you do

12:36

with it . And I decided

12:38

to use it as fuel for change

12:41

, and I did it in

12:43

the only way I knew

12:46

how , which is to

12:48

talk . I have no problem

12:50

talking . I have no problem speaking to

12:52

strangers , and I thought , well , i'm

12:55

gonna do that . I am genuinely

12:57

curious about the women on this planet

13:00

and what they are doing , and that

13:02

there is there's no one

13:04

highlighting them , so I think I'll

13:06

go do it , because I

13:08

can't find anybody else who is

13:10

So if not me

13:12

, then who ? So

13:15

I'm ? I'm doing it because

13:17

the call was put out and

13:19

I answered it .

13:21

I love that And you are so

13:23

journeying along your way , one

13:27

story at a time , one

13:29

moment of inspiration at a time

13:32

. But I want to take it a little bit deeper

13:34

, and I know you just mentioned

13:36

to the audience that the seeing

13:39

what was happening in the workplace was a point

13:41

of frustration , but

13:44

I think that's kind of like

13:46

the icing on the cake . I want to get to the

13:48

cake . What

13:50

has happened in your past

13:53

that even created a level of sensitivity

13:56

in you that would

13:58

spark an anger as to how other

14:01

women were not being recognized

14:03

? Was there any point in your

14:05

life outside of work where you

14:07

felt that perhaps my voice isn't being

14:09

heard or where I'm not being recognized

14:12

or I'm not being seen ?

14:14

Even in my own family Being

14:17

I am the oldest of four children and

14:20

I wasn't being heard . Don't

14:23

have any idea why , and

14:26

I'm pretty loud . I don't

14:29

have any problem in expressing myself , but I just

14:31

didn't feel as if I was being heard . So

14:34

not , and it's not just in my family . Out

14:37

in public You

14:39

get pushed aside And

14:42

I realize that I'm not . I don't

14:44

take up a lot of space physically because

14:46

I'm not a big person , but

14:48

people walk by you like they don't even

14:50

know you , that they don't even see you

14:52

, and I thought I

14:55

don't want to be irrelevant

14:57

. I don't want to be erased

14:59

from history , and

15:01

I don't want other women

15:03

to be erased either , because

15:06

they are contributing so

15:08

much every day

15:11

to every , every

15:14

aspect of their lives that they show up

15:16

in . They're contributing something

15:18

. I don't want them to be erased

15:20

Because what

15:22

we're doing is world-changing

15:25

. People need to know about it .

15:27

To the listening audience . We are here

15:29

with the amazing Audra Egan

15:32

, who is the founder of Women , in the Arena . She

15:34

just said something very profound . If you

15:37

are a woman out there that feel like you're

15:39

being marginalized perhaps

15:41

you're even sitting on the sideline of your own

15:43

life and have

15:46

the fear of being erased , not

15:48

being significant I

15:50

want you to just really lean in because I know

15:52

Audra is going to give us some solutions

15:55

to help you overcome that

15:57

and to stand in your seat of power , to

15:59

stand in your divine genius

16:01

that I believe all of us have Now

16:04

. Audra , you mentioned that this is

16:07

and this is prior conversations

16:09

that we've had that this is just like a fire

16:11

in you , that you feel that this was

16:13

a calling At this point

16:15

in your life now

16:19

a woman over 50 , you are

16:21

really solidified in this

16:23

purpose . It's

16:26

a very heavy call . We

16:28

know at this time in the world , women's

16:30

voices are being amplified even

16:32

more , but

16:35

there's still those that are

16:37

afraid . They're afraid of how society

16:39

will receive them or reject them . Family

16:42

, we all want to be loved and accepted

16:45

. If you could give

16:47

three points of encouragement

16:49

to those women out there

16:51

that are saying gosh , audra , i

16:54

hear you , but I'm just not like you . What

16:57

would you say to them ?

16:59

First , i would say I'm afraid

17:01

every single day

17:03

. This is scary What I'm doing

17:06

, putting a microphone in front of my own

17:08

face and every

17:10

single week interviewing

17:12

somebody else . I'm completely

17:15

and 100% vulnerable every

17:17

single conversation I have , because it doesn't

17:19

work if I'm not . And

17:21

I'm afraid every single

17:24

day . Every time I post

17:26

something vulnerable , i'm afraid

17:28

, but I'm doing

17:30

it anyway . I'm

17:32

doing one scary thing every

17:35

single day because

17:38

I have learned

17:40

number one your comfort zone

17:42

is a cage . It's

17:44

a cage . The magic

17:47

exists just

17:49

on the other side of it . I

17:51

don't want to be imprisoned anymore . So

17:54

that's number one Understand

17:56

that what you think is comfortable

17:58

is holding you captive

18:00

. Second

18:03

thing is that do

18:06

you really not

18:08

want to live up to your full

18:10

potential ? I

18:13

have this visual of

18:15

when I die

18:17

and hopefully go to heaven

18:19

and I'm

18:21

sitting across the table from

18:24

that big giant higher power . I

18:27

have this vision that a

18:29

piece of paper is slid across the table

18:32

to me . I don't

18:34

want him to say or she

18:36

, whomever , or whatever that higher

18:38

power is . I

18:40

don't want that higher power to say

18:42

this is what I had in mind

18:45

for you , but you didn't do

18:47

it because you were too

18:49

busy being comfortable . So

18:52

I don't want to miss out on

18:54

what's planned for me just

18:57

because I've got a little

18:59

bit of fear . So

19:01

that's the second thing . Don't miss

19:04

out on what you're here for . And

19:08

number three stop

19:10

caring what everybody else thinks . They're

19:14

not you . They

19:16

don't live your life , they don't

19:18

pay your bills . They don't live in your

19:21

skin . Quit giving them

19:23

rent-free space in

19:25

your head . Stop

19:27

it . The moment that you

19:30

give up the

19:32

authority of opinions

19:34

of others on your life

19:36

, that is when you start

19:38

to take back freedom , and

19:41

in freedom in all aspects , you

19:44

start to march toward freedom And you

19:46

start to march toward who you really

19:48

are .

19:49

With that last statement , it made me think

19:51

of the song Freedom by George Michael

19:54

, and you're

19:56

absolutely correct And I love

19:58

those three points . It's feel the fear

20:01

and do it anyway . Be

20:03

willing to live

20:06

up to your full potential , explore

20:08

, find out what it is . And

20:10

then , third , is get

20:13

other people out of your head . Stop

20:15

bringing space to them , right ?

20:17

Yes , Your

20:20

brain is an amazing , wonderful and

20:23

sometimes complicated space . Quit

20:25

inviting other people in it . Quit

20:29

borrowing trouble from other people that don't belong to

20:31

you . You can do trouble all

20:33

on your own , You don't need any

20:35

help .

20:39

Exactly . You mentioned

20:41

being a part of Celebrate

20:43

You embracing her wellness , and

20:47

I know that you

20:49

were talking about recognition And I

20:51

think all of us we

20:54

want to be appreciated , we

20:57

want to be celebrated , but

20:59

I always challenge individuals . The

21:01

first thing is you have

21:03

to be able to celebrate yourself . If

21:05

you're not able to celebrate who

21:08

you are , why do you expect the

21:10

world to stand up and applaud you ? Tell

21:13

me about a time during this women

21:15

in the arena journey that

21:18

you were able to truly

21:20

look at Audra in the mirror and

21:22

celebrate the amazing

21:24

work that you're doing .

21:27

I told you , i'm scared every single day , and

21:30

that is one of the areas because

21:33

it's sort of uncomfortable . We're

21:35

not trained to

21:37

celebrate ourselves , as

21:40

a matter of fact . We are trained not to . We

21:42

are trained to diminish

21:45

our

21:47

accomplishments and no big

21:49

deal . What not ? And

21:52

so that's something that I'm still getting

21:54

comfortable with . I'm still getting comfortable

21:56

with celebrating , showing

21:59

up for other

22:01

women , and part

22:03

of the reason that there's this level of discomfort

22:05

is because I never started

22:07

this for

22:11

recognition for myself . I

22:13

literally started this because it was something I

22:16

needed . I went looking

22:18

for it and couldn't find it , so I thought , well

22:20

, if I need it , maybe somebody else does too , and

22:23

so that it's

22:25

a little bit uncomfortable , but

22:27

it's okay , because I know that

22:31

if it's uncomfortable , i'm

22:33

doing the right thing . So

22:36

I am working on the celebration . I will tell

22:38

you that when

22:41

I turned 50 and I

22:43

turned 52 in a week , and

22:46

at the time that this will be published

22:48

, my birthday will be three days away from it , so

22:51

my birthday is June 24th . The

22:53

year I turned 50 , i started to

22:55

throw myself a birthday party . So

22:58

I threw myself a birthday party for my 50th

23:00

birthday , i threw one for my 51st

23:03

birthday and I'm throwing

23:05

one for my 52nd birthday And

23:07

it's not because I'm like , hey , look at me , look at

23:09

me . It's because I want to celebrate And

23:12

I want to celebrate with all these amazing women

23:14

coming over to my house And

23:16

, as I like to say , we're letting our freak flags

23:19

fly And we're just going to have some

23:21

fun and have some giggles

23:23

and have some bubbles , without

23:25

any stress . And it's

23:27

not for the point of celebrating

23:30

my birthday . That's just the excuse . It's

23:32

to celebrate each other and

23:34

our community together . So

23:37

I know that's a long-winded answer

23:39

to your question , but it's

23:41

the truth .

23:44

And I love that . And when you think about

23:47

it celebration , laughter , joy

23:49

, peace it's all contagious energy

23:52

. When people

23:54

are around that , then they're like wow , i

23:56

want to do that too . How do I do that

23:59

? How do I show up ? Because when you're celebrating

24:01

, truly celebrating yourself , i believe

24:03

that's when you're showing up

24:06

in your authenticity , in

24:08

your genius , in your beauty . It's

24:11

just world . this is me and

24:14

I love me and I am

24:16

doing me . You're

24:19

allowing yourself , you've gotten to the point in

24:21

your life's journey that

24:24

you're giving yourself permission to

24:26

be Audra , not to be corporate

24:28

Audra , not to be mom

24:30

, not to be wife , but

24:32

to be Audra .

24:34

That is the day that I get to do it And

24:37

I tell the ladies come

24:40

as you want to . If you want to come in your

24:42

pajamas , come in your pajamas , i don't

24:44

care , come

24:46

and have fun and leave

24:49

all of your insecurities , all

24:52

your worries , all

24:54

of those thoughts that are plaguing

24:57

you and occupying space in your head . Leave them at the

24:59

door , because that is not what this day

25:01

is about . This day

25:03

is freedom . It is celebrating

25:05

freedom .

25:07

I would suspect in the last three

25:09

years of this journey

25:12

appeared , with

25:14

just life's transitions

25:16

, that you are a

25:18

far different person than

25:20

you were before , but

25:23

the essence of you is the same

25:25

. I think the freedom

25:27

of your expression is what has changed

25:30

, would you ?

25:31

agree , i would agree . I'm

25:34

not editing myself

25:36

anymore . I'm not saying

25:39

, oh well , i don't want to show them that part

25:41

of me because they may not like that

25:44

part of me , or I

25:46

don't want them to know this about me , because what

25:48

will they think ? Now

25:50

I'm like I don't care , i really

25:52

don't , i really don't

25:55

care . This is me , this is all of me

25:57

. And if you like me , great

25:59

. If you don't like me , that's

26:02

okay too , because it doesn't matter . And

26:05

I show up this way , even

26:07

professionally , even in my corporate

26:09

job . I make up words

26:11

regularly And it

26:14

doesn't matter who I speak to And

26:17

you know they laugh . I

26:19

mean , today I was looking for

26:21

a PowerPoint , couldn't find it . I

26:23

literally said out loud I'm becoming my grandmother

26:26

, i'm putting stuff away for safekeeping

26:28

, and then I can't find them , and

26:30

I really didn't care what

26:32

they thought of me , with me

26:34

saying that out loud . So

26:37

I'm not afraid to show

26:39

the world who I really , really

26:41

am And I'm

26:43

fun , i'm goofy , i'm serious

26:45

, i make up words , i'm

26:48

a Star Wars dork . I mean , i

26:50

am who I am .

26:52

One of the things that

26:55

we talked a little bit about is

26:57

change , and

26:59

With you Adding

27:03

to your platter of

27:05

things that you do , you have

27:07

women in the arena . You

27:09

and your husband made a decision

27:12

where he has a new career path

27:14

and Sometimes

27:16

, when individuals in in

27:18

a shared household take a different

27:20

path , that can cause friction . On

27:23

top of that , your children

27:25

have created their own paths that you're celebrating

27:28

. What would

27:30

you say to a woman who is struggling

27:32

with that , with letting go of

27:36

What was and

27:38

embracing the new and what

27:40

is ?

27:41

I will say I totally understand

27:43

you , i completely empathize

27:46

with what you're feeling . As

27:48

Luana knows , and as

27:50

some of my listeners know , my

27:52

daughter got married this spring and

27:55

From the from the day

27:57

of her bridal shower until about

27:59

I don't know , probably three

28:01

weeks ago , i cried every

28:03

day . I cried every single

28:05

day because I knew

28:07

that I was mourning what

28:10

Was no longer

28:12

my role . I was

28:15

mourning And I'm

28:17

gonna say it's a loss , because it wasn't a

28:19

loss , it was a closure . It

28:21

was a closure of a chapter

28:23

that was ending

28:26

and I allowed

28:28

myself that . So I would say allow

28:30

yourself that , allow yourself to mourn

28:33

the ending of a chapter , but

28:36

don't stay there , because That's

28:39

not the end of

28:41

the story , that's

28:43

just the end of the chapter . You

28:46

have a whole lifetime to

28:48

Write and

28:50

it's and it's unknown . So

28:53

don't be , don't be stuck

28:55

in the morning that you miss the

28:57

celebration of the new . Take

29:00

the time you need Now . Let's don't

29:02

stay there , just visit , don't stay

29:04

, don't take up residence .

29:06

How ? how is that experience

29:08

, and even the lesson that you're sharing

29:11

, help to

29:13

make you a A

29:17

better interviewer , one

29:20

who is able to interview from a

29:22

place of empathy and

29:25

understanding ?

29:26

I think it's because I have

29:28

become intimately aware of

29:30

how similar

29:33

we are , regardless

29:35

of which country you're from , your

29:38

, your educational background , your

29:40

job , your , your

29:42

race , your religion , your sexual

29:44

orientation None of that

29:47

matters , that is

29:49

, that's just noise

29:51

. But what's

29:53

truly important

29:55

are the things that make us more

29:58

similar , which is our emotions

30:00

, and since I had

30:03

these bevy of emotions , which

30:05

were surprised to me , i

30:08

am not a crier . My husband

30:10

will tell you that the only time he has actually ever

30:12

really seen me cry is when I am mad

30:15

. So

30:17

feeling these emotions , being overwhelmed with

30:19

emotions , is not necessarily me

30:21

, but it allowed

30:23

me to understand Me

30:25

a little bit better and since I understood me

30:27

a little bit better , i would , i'm think

30:29

, i'm able to understand other

30:32

women a little bit better , and it's

30:35

given me strength and

30:37

starting to Recognize

30:40

and feel empathy , whereas

30:42

I don't think I fully

30:45

allowed myself that before I might

30:47

have been , i might have been a little afraid of it

30:49

. Honestly , feeling

30:51

empathy is a little

30:53

scary , but now

30:56

that I've gone through this experience , i realized

30:58

that it's really nothing to be afraid of

31:00

. You just Pick

31:02

up your feet and go with it , because on

31:04

the other side are rewards

31:06

, and that's how

31:08

I try to meet my guest

31:11

is Go on the journey

31:13

with them and let them know that I am truly

31:15

there with them and at the end

31:17

of it there are rewards .

31:20

I love that I draw

31:22

. When you look at yourself

31:24

now in the mirror . Who

31:27

is Audra ? minus , minus

31:30

outfit titles , all

31:32

the wonderful accolades , who

31:34

are you ?

31:36

Wow , okay

31:38

, wow

31:41

, i did not realize I was gonna get this . I

31:43

I pause for a moment because I I Got

31:47

this surge of emotion that I

31:49

was not expecting . So let

31:51

me take a deep breath and tell you Audra

31:55

is a woman that

31:57

is healing a little girl , and

32:00

that little girl is me . I

32:03

Was a very sad little girl . I

32:06

was a very lonely little girl . I

32:09

Thought that

32:11

the more I achieved , i

32:13

would finally be

32:15

worthy of love and

32:18

It . It was this , this

32:21

cycle that happened that I Just

32:24

wanted to be loved so badly and

32:27

get acknowledged and recognized

32:29

, and it never came . So

32:31

, rather than rebel , i was like

32:33

I'll just , or I'll , achieve more , then

32:36

I'll finally be worthy and I

32:38

would do this cycle , and it was . It's been

32:40

a lifetime cycle and

32:44

now I recognize that that cycle

32:46

Wasn't , it

32:48

was never mine . So

32:50

I am a woman healing from

32:53

that . I am a woman

32:55

that is embracing

32:57

the unknown . I Am

33:00

a woman that Wants

33:03

to go see the world . I Am

33:06

a woman that finally recognizes

33:09

and sees myself as

33:12

a fully formed

33:14

adult most of the time , and

33:21

I I realize that I am

33:24

just getting started , that

33:27

I yes , my , my

33:29

kid . I've lived . I've lived a lifetime

33:31

already . But

33:33

I realized that that was just the first

33:35

half . The women

33:37

in my , in my family live

33:40

a long , long time . They live well

33:42

into their 90s . So I realized

33:45

that , oh , i've , i've had

33:47

half a lifetime . I got another half to

33:49

go . What adventures do

33:51

I want to do ? and

33:53

I'm excited about

33:56

the possibilities and

33:58

I suddenly have realized

34:00

that Anything's

34:03

possible , literally anything's possible

34:05

. If you can dream it , you

34:07

can probably do it , and you Don't

34:10

have to know how to do it . So

34:13

I'm a woman that's curious and I'm

34:16

a woman that's can't wait to see

34:18

what's next .

34:19

I , i love that

34:21

you are at the point where you

34:24

said that I'm a woman who's healing

34:26

and you're able

34:28

to look back at little Audra and

34:31

hold her and tell her it's okay , right

34:35

, because you're a sum of these

34:38

wonderful highs and lows

34:40

that life is taking you through . And

34:43

if you just imagine , would

34:46

you be such a force

34:48

on women in the arena

34:50

if you didn't have those experiences

34:52

?

34:54

Because I believe , that you're

34:56

as .

34:57

Women are hearing , you're tapping back here

34:59

, there's things in your journey It's like okay

35:01

, i may not have experienced that exact

35:03

thing , but I understand

35:05

the emotion , i understand the fear , i understand

35:08

the longing Right .

35:09

Oh , yeah , yeah , these , these

35:12

women that are sharing their stories with me

35:14

. It's , it's

35:16

remarkable how much their stories

35:19

have helped change and shape

35:21

my own , how how

35:23

much it has helped me heal

35:26

from hurts that I didn't even remember

35:28

that I had , that

35:30

I was carrying with me as

35:33

I don't know as as

35:35

heavy weights . But you carry

35:37

with them so long that you no longer feel it , until

35:40

another woman highlights something

35:43

in their lives and you go oh , oh

35:45

, yeah , i have that too . Oh

35:48

, and then you work through it and you let

35:50

it go . And

35:52

that's been an amazing gift

35:54

is letting it go Go , and

35:58

you have to do that because you

36:00

can't . The other , the

36:02

other part of feeling empathy

36:04

, is that you can't

36:06

absorb their

36:08

pain too , because

36:10

that's you can experience

36:13

it with them . But

36:15

you have to go through it , because

36:17

if you keep all of theirs inside

36:19

, there wouldn't be no way I could do this , because

36:22

it would crush me .

36:25

I totally agree . In

36:28

our life we have

36:31

often many individuals

36:33

that inspire us along the way . But

36:37

if you were to pick one person

36:39

who , whether

36:41

past or present , but you find yourself always

36:43

leaning in to that voice , who would that person be in your life ? Once

36:45

again , i'm getting emotional .

36:53

It was my grandmother . It was this amazing woman who only had an eighth

36:55

grade education . She never worked

36:58

, but she was so smart And

37:04

she poured all of the

37:06

wisdom that

37:09

she could into me And

37:12

she was so good at it . And

37:16

she I

37:18

refer to it as Graham's beauty

37:21

boot camp . What

37:24

she would do is she

37:26

would make me walk around her backyard with

37:28

a book on my head Because , she says

37:30

, she didn't want me to clump around like a horse , so

37:35

she had me walk around her backyard with a book

37:37

on my head So I would carry my carriage

37:40

. Properly is how she referred to it

37:42

, as She taught me how to sit

37:44

. She taught me how

37:46

to set a dinner

37:49

table , what all the forks were for

37:51

, and I kept asking

37:53

her why am I doing this ? And

37:55

she would say you're

37:59

going to need this one day . You're

38:01

going to be at some fancy dinner

38:04

parties , which I had no idea what she referred to

38:06

. I now know what is business dinners

38:08

But she says you're going to be at these

38:10

fancy dinner parties and you're going to

38:12

have absolutely exquisite

38:15

manners . And

38:17

I thought , ok , didn't

38:19

know what she was talking about , but

38:21

I did it . She taught

38:24

me how to play checkers And

38:26

wouldn't let me win . She

38:29

read to me every single day , and

38:32

she didn't read me just little

38:35

kids books , she read me

38:37

novels , like she read me little women

38:39

when I was very , very young . She

38:44

, she , she

38:46

was an immigrant , so

38:48

she did her best to

38:51

teach me Spanish as a little girl . She

38:55

made me watch those tele novellas so

38:57

it would sink in and I just couldn't . Sorry grams , sorry

38:59

grams , but it just couldn't

39:01

. But she

39:03

was such a force And

39:06

she did so much

39:09

, was so little , and

39:12

she poured all of

39:14

this into me . So

39:17

then maybe I could take the torch And

39:20

take it further than what was afforded

39:23

to her . So that is

39:25

what I think of all the time Is

39:28

the things that I'm doing , the things

39:30

that I , the opportunities that I get , the

39:32

awards that I that I achieve

39:35

. I take her with me And

39:38

I know that

39:41

there just as much hers as

39:43

they are mine , because I wouldn't

39:46

have been able to do any of it

39:48

without her pouring

39:51

into me the things that she poured

39:53

into me , not knowing what she

39:55

was doing . I mean , you'd think

39:57

you'd let a kid win checkers , not

40:00

her . Nope , she says you're going to beat

40:02

me fair and square , and it took me years

40:05

, but she that taught

40:07

me persistence , that

40:09

taught me strategy And

40:11

it taught me fair play And

40:14

those were really big lessons to learn

40:16

and take forward as we

40:18

go through this crazy life . So

40:20

it's her , it's always

40:23

been her . What did you

40:25

call your grandmother ?

40:26

Grams . Grams , one

40:31

of the things I will . You said a lot , and

40:33

I love when I hear people share about

40:35

their parents , especially their

40:37

, their grandparents . So so , grams

40:41

, as you mentioned , she taught you

40:43

the lessons of strategy

40:45

, presence , culture

40:48

, literature

40:50

, ethics

40:52

, etiquette right

40:55

, and that's

40:58

huge , because those are lifelong

41:01

lessons that you apply every

41:04

single day . And

41:06

, as you were talking , it made me think

41:08

of a song by Danny

41:11

Bell called Ordinary People , and

41:13

one part of the lyrics it says God uses

41:16

ordinary people who

41:18

are willing to do as He commands

41:20

, because little becomes

41:23

much when you place it in the master's

41:25

hands . And you

41:28

were that little child

41:31

that she was

41:33

given to safeguard

41:36

, to protect , to

41:38

nurture . Now

41:41

look at you , lodra , look

41:45

at the women who you're touching because of

41:47

Gramps .

41:49

I hope I make her proud . I

41:51

really do . I hope

41:54

that I make her proud I

41:56

know she's smiling .

41:57

now You're near me crying .

41:58

I'm not going to edit that out because I need to hear . It's

42:03

her every single day

42:05

. I hope that I do

42:07

what she wanted me to do . Yeah

42:10

, beautiful beautiful story .

42:13

So we've talked about your inspiration with

42:17

women in the arena . We think about

42:19

the women

42:22

today who you are inspiring

42:24

and you're celebrating their

42:26

stories . How

42:28

do you hope this will help to influence

42:31

the next generation that's coming

42:33

behind ?

42:35

First of all , the next generation

42:37

that's coming behind inspires me all

42:40

the time . They

42:43

are fearless in a way that I was not

42:45

fearless at that age . They

42:47

are not afraid to take up space . They

42:50

are not afraid to communicate

42:54

what they think . They are

42:56

not afraid to leave

42:58

a situation that doesn't

43:01

serve them . They

43:03

inspire me all the time

43:05

. What I hope is

43:08

that the generation

43:11

that's just behind

43:13

us will do a better job

43:15

of recognizing

43:17

other women as our

43:20

sisters , as our

43:22

greatest assets on

43:24

this planet , rather

43:27

than our competition , because

43:29

my generation , for

43:32

whatever reason , grew

43:34

up with this falsehood that

43:36

other women are your competition , and maybe

43:38

it was because there were so few of us fighting

43:41

for space and we thought , well , i've

43:45

gotten here , i got to defend my territory because

43:47

there's only one little spot and I've got

43:49

it . That's wrong . That

43:52

is absolutely wrong . When

43:56

I get to a space where

43:59

I'm like , ok , i've made it , i'm

44:01

automatically making space for the next one

44:03

to come with me . Automatically

44:06

, i'm making room . That

44:09

was something I needed to learn , because

44:12

that was not ingrained in me , and

44:15

I'm hoping that the next generation does

44:18

a better job than we did . When

44:21

my daughter was a teenager , i

44:24

told her , i said to her . I

44:26

don't do mean girls . I

44:28

don't play mean girl games . I don't want to hear

44:30

mean girl stories . That

44:33

does not exist in this house . There's

44:35

no such thing as mean girls . They're

44:37

misunderstood girls , not

44:40

mean girls , and I

44:42

take that with me with all

44:45

of the women I meet . I may not get along with every

44:47

woman I meet , but they're

44:49

probably still my greatest

44:51

asset and not my competition

44:54

.

44:56

Yeah , and we don't have to get along with everyone

44:58

, but we do need to

45:00

respect everyone right .

45:03

Everybody's fighting a fight . Every

45:06

woman on this planet is in that arena

45:08

. Every single woman

45:10

is a warrior in some way , shape or form

45:12

. Respect that , respect

45:14

that they're fighting a fight too .

45:17

So you've created this amazing

45:19

table of conversation . One

45:21

of the things that Shirley Chisholm

45:23

said was if

45:25

they will not invite you

45:28

to the table , you bring your

45:30

chair to the table . But you've gone a step

45:32

beyond that and said I don't really

45:34

see a table like this . So

45:36

I'm creating this table that

45:39

is all over . It's popping

45:41

up all over the world . How many

45:43

nations are you in currently ?

45:47

As of this morning , 71

45:50

. Wow .

45:52

Congratulations Yeah .

45:54

Is that insane , or what ? 71

45:59

countries ? Here's my voice . I

46:04

try not to think about it too much because that will

46:06

just make my head explode , but

46:08

I just look at it and go , wow , i

46:12

wonder , i wonder

46:14

what those conversations

46:16

are doing in those lives . I

46:18

wonder what's happening in those

46:20

communities . I hope , i

46:23

hope it is having a positive

46:25

effect .

46:27

I believe it is . I mean , this is

46:29

catching on like wildfire And

46:32

one of the things sometimes

46:35

people think , well , there's not much I can do . I'm

46:37

in my own little community , but in

46:40

your sphere of influencing and you're a testament

46:42

to this that if we step out

46:44

and we show up and

46:47

we press all in , then

46:50

we become this wave maker

46:52

I don't like to say ripple

46:54

maker , it's wave maker . You're creating this tsunami

46:57

effect because only a tsunami is

46:59

going to cross and

47:01

hit other nations . A little ripple

47:03

and a pond isn't going to do that . So

47:06

you're creating these tsunami episodes

47:08

with every single conversation

47:10

. That is causing

47:13

women to stir up within themselves

47:15

a strength that may

47:17

not have been there or may

47:19

need or is maybe

47:22

it becomes even greater

47:24

. They feel

47:26

, as you said , united . There's

47:28

this sisterhood , not just in

47:31

name only , but a true sisterhood

47:33

, by uniting our stories and

47:36

making a change . And we often

47:38

hear Gandhi's statement be

47:40

the change you want to see in the world . And

47:43

I always flip that and say be the change

47:45

the world sees . So 70

47:47

nations , the world is

47:49

hearing , seeing

47:51

and hearing the impact of women

47:53

in the arena And that is phenomenal

47:56

. So kudos .

47:59

Thank you . You know what You

48:01

use , what you got You know . And growing

48:04

up my dad would say you know what You

48:07

talk so much You must have been vaccinated

48:09

with a phonograph needle . Well , close

48:11

, close , i

48:13

have a microphone and I'm using it

48:16

.

48:19

I want to go back to Grams And

48:22

I know she's giving you many

48:24

, many words of wisdom , but

48:27

if you could leave the audience with

48:29

one thing that they could

48:31

take hold , that

48:33

grammism , if you will , what

48:37

would that be ? What would you tell the audience ?

48:41

First of all , i wish that everybody could have met

48:43

my Grams , because she would have changed

48:45

your world too . And I'm going to give you

48:47

a visual , because for

48:50

me to be able to tell you what

48:52

she said to me , you need

48:54

the full visual . She

48:57

was a 5'1" , 100-pound

49:00

, soaking wet little Hispanic woman that

49:03

would cuss a blue streak

49:05

, but in Spanish . So it sounded pretty . But

49:10

she and I'm only 5'4"

49:12

, but I felt like a giant

49:14

compared to her . I didn't realize

49:16

I was short until I married my husband , because

49:18

he's 6'6" . That's when I realized , oh

49:20

, i'm short . But I didn't think , i didn't

49:22

know that at the time . My

49:25

Grams would look up at me and point

49:27

her finger at me and say don't

49:30

ever , ever

49:33

let anybody tell you

49:35

what you're not . You

49:38

know who you are . Don't let

49:40

anybody say that

49:42

you're something different than who you are

49:44

. That's what she would say

49:46

, and she would stand there and she would stick

49:48

her finger in your face And

49:51

you'd be terrified .

49:55

That's powerful . It's know

49:58

who you are , own it , and

50:01

do so unapologetically . And

50:05

so often as we , as women

50:07

, we journey through life and

50:10

we see all these impressions

50:12

, whether it's social media , magazine , TV , everything

50:14

telling us what we should be

50:17

, how we should look , how we should talk , how we

50:19

should dress , how we should be

50:21

, And the

50:23

world is groaning under

50:25

the weight of that . And

50:28

Grams got it right

50:30

. She's saying

50:32

just be , know who you

50:34

are , own it , draw

50:38

that line in the sand . It's

50:40

like this is me right

50:42

. And it's so

50:44

powerful Because when you

50:46

are you , then

50:49

your purpose shows up , Then

50:52

the visions come , Then the opportunities

50:55

unfold , And it's

50:58

for such a time as this is

51:00

women in the arena And you're

51:03

just scratching the surface . I

51:06

mean , I'm three years . I

51:08

remember when you were telling

51:10

me I'm thinking of doing this . Where

51:13

is it going to be three years from now ?

51:16

I didn't even know to dream that it would last three

51:18

years . I didn't even know

51:20

that . I didn't even know if anybody

51:22

would listen . And now it's in

51:24

70 plus countries What

51:27

in the world ? And it's

51:29

just because I took a chance

51:31

And I take

51:33

one step forward

51:36

every single day . It

51:38

literally is just that one step

51:41

forward , because here's

51:43

a secret , guys , i don't know what I'm doing

51:45

, i really don't . I'm learning

51:48

as I go along , but

51:50

I take one step forward

51:54

towards something every

51:57

single day , so far

51:59

that something hasn't stared me

52:01

wrong .

52:02

I have two last questions before we end

52:05

, and the first is

52:07

if a woman is interested

52:10

in being on your show , is there

52:13

a type of

52:15

woman or a type of story that you want

52:17

to feature ? And then

52:19

, secondly , what's

52:22

next ? What can we expect next

52:24

for women in the arena ?

52:26

Well , in order to get ahold of me , first

52:29

of all , there's no type of

52:31

woman , there's no particular story

52:33

of woman , because I think all

52:35

of our stories are amazing

52:38

and remarkable and are worth sharing

52:40

. The only caveat

52:43

is are you ready ? Are

52:45

you ready to tell your story ? Because this

52:47

is scary , especially when I

52:49

just told you that your voice will be heard around

52:51

the world . So , if you're ready

52:53

, let's tell your story , because

52:56

, as I said before , you have to be vulnerable

52:58

or else this doesn't work . If

53:01

you're interested , reach out to me . I

53:05

am on all of the

53:07

social platforms . You can email

53:09

me . I mean , reach out to me , talk

53:11

to me . I talk to every single

53:14

woman that reaches out to me , every single

53:16

one . Not all of them are ready

53:18

to tell their story , but I

53:21

am willing to listen to every

53:23

single woman that has been brave

53:25

enough to connect with me , every

53:28

single one . And then

53:30

, as far as what's next , i

53:32

have big dreams . I have huge dreams

53:34

. I have zero idea how

53:36

I'm going to get there , but I have

53:39

this dream of having

53:41

an in-person

53:44

experience . I don't

53:46

even want to use the word event , because event

53:48

just sounds so sterile . I

53:50

want it to be an experience . I

53:53

want this experience to be one

53:55

unlike any other that

53:57

you've ever had before , and

53:59

I want it to stay with you

54:02

. I want the experience to haunt you

54:04

so that you will come back

54:06

for more . So I have this big

54:09

, giant dream . I don't know how I'm going to get it done , but

54:12

I didn't know how I was going to do this either

54:15

. So who knows ? I

54:17

don't know . We'll see what happens in the next 12

54:19

months . You never know .

54:22

You never know And , as Bert Smith-Lynes

54:24

always says , trust and allow , don't

54:26

ask how . Audra Egan

54:28

, it has been an honor and a

54:30

privilege to be here on

54:33

your show as the host of Women

54:35

in the Arena interviewing you

54:37

and celebrating you for all the amazing

54:40

things that you're doing . Thank you so very

54:42

much for having me .

54:43

Thank you for being willing to

54:45

be my host today and

54:48

being willing

54:50

to put me in the hot seat , which I knew

54:52

you would . I knew you wouldn't let me

54:54

off the hook , and thank

54:56

you for your friendship

54:59

and your support that you have given

55:01

me over the last three years , and

55:04

I can't wait to see what

55:06

else we're going to do . So thank

55:09

you for being here , and

55:11

I want to thank each and every one

55:13

of you for being such an incredible

55:15

supportive audience . This

55:18

simply would not happen without you

55:20

. So thank you so much

55:22

for supporting me these three years

55:24

, and let's see what happens in the next

55:26

three years . So thank you all so

55:29

much for being here And I'll see you again

55:31

next time .