0:10

In this empowering and insightful

0:12

episode, self-made entrepreneur Jamie Kern

0:14

Lima shares her inspiring personal

0:16

journey from Denny's Waitress with

0:18

big dreams to launching It

0:20

Cosmetics, a billion dollar company.

0:23

Jamie will show you why self-doubt has such

0:25

a profound impact on your aspirations and why

0:27

it's so important to believe in your own

0:30

worthiness. Finally, she'll guide

0:32

you through a powerful four-step process

0:34

to redefine your relationship with rejection.

0:37

Get ready for a shift that will instill resilience,

0:40

fearlessness, and unshakeable self-worth, ultimately

0:42

transforming your life. If

0:45

you enjoy today's episode, we think you'll love

0:47

Jamie's brand new book, Worthy, How to Believe

0:49

You Are Enough and Transform Your Life. Get

0:52

your copy at heyhouse.com/worthy or wherever

0:54

you buy your books. Hello,

0:59

Hey House family. I am Jamie

1:01

Kern Lima, author of

1:04

the new book, Worthy, How

1:06

to Believe You Are Enough and

1:08

Transform Your Entire Life. And

1:11

I am so excited to share these

1:13

next few minutes together that I hope

1:15

do transform your entire life. So, you

1:17

know, most people know me, if

1:19

they know me, they've Googled my story and

1:22

realize, oh, wow, you know, they see that

1:24

I went from being a Denny's waitress with

1:26

lots of dreams on my heart and to,

1:28

to, to launching a company called It Cosmetics

1:30

in my living room, dealing with

1:32

years and years and years of rejection and

1:34

failure and learning how to power through and

1:37

how to believe in myself, even when other

1:39

people didn't. And eventually I built

1:41

that business into a billion dollar company.

1:44

But really every single

1:46

one of us, there's a common thread in every

1:48

one of us that

1:51

knows, right, that knows who

1:53

we are, as we are, is

1:56

more than enough. But then what

1:58

happens in our lifetime, whether we hope

2:00

for beautiful, healthy, amazing relationships,

2:02

or we want to manifest

2:05

beautiful things in our relationships,

2:07

or our businesses, or

2:09

our goals, or our dreams, right? What

2:11

starts to happen is we start learning

2:14

all these lies that lead to

2:16

self-doubt. And self-doubt

2:19

can kill more dreams than almost

2:21

anything else. And for so

2:23

many of us, if we are not careful, we

2:26

actually learn to doubt ourselves out

2:29

of our own destiny. But

2:31

here's the deal. There are truths that

2:34

wake up worthiness. And

2:37

believing you are worthy is

2:39

the one thing that really, truly

2:41

changes every single area of your

2:43

life instantly. Because in life, we

2:45

don't become what we want. We

2:48

become what we believe we're worthy of. And

2:51

let me just go a step further. Because we are a Hay House

2:53

family here. We don't

2:55

manifest or pray for

2:57

and get what we want. We

2:59

still, we can do all that. We can even

3:01

work so, so, so hard for it. But

3:04

if we deep down do not believe we are

3:06

worthy of it, it will not come. So

3:09

the real work is

3:12

to do the deep internal work of believing you

3:14

are worthy. It is why I wrote the book

3:16

Worthy, because so much

3:18

of my life I did not

3:20

believe I was. And when you

3:22

don't believe you are worthy, you stay

3:24

stuck. You don't know why you feel stuck.

3:27

You put in the hard work and manifest and pray and

3:29

do all the things that you don't know why things aren't

3:31

coming. Or you do get something big

3:33

that comes into your life, but you sabotage it

3:35

and you don't know why. We

3:38

do not soar to the level

3:40

of our goals and dreams. We stay stuck

3:42

at the level of our self-worth. In

3:45

life, in our businesses, in our relationships,

3:48

we don't rise to what we

3:50

believe is possible. We fall to

3:52

what we believe we're worthy of. So

3:55

it is why I wrote Worthy. There's over

3:57

20 tools in there on how to build

3:59

unshakable self-worth. We're going to dive

4:01

into one of them, just one of

4:03

them right now that has been so

4:05

impactful in my life and I'm so,

4:07

so, so excited to share it with

4:09

you. When you

4:11

change your relationship with rejection,

4:14

you change your entire

4:16

life. So many of us think, oh, if

4:19

I just manifest things or pray for things

4:21

or work really, really, really hard, then I'll

4:23

get unstuck and I'll get the things I

4:25

want in my life. And you

4:27

can do all those things and I do all

4:29

of those. I pray, I manifest, right? I work

4:31

really, really, really hard. But deep

4:34

down inside, you don't feel you're

4:36

worthy of the thing or you have this

4:39

fear or this association of

4:41

pain with the potential rejection,

4:43

you'll stay stuck, even

4:46

if you do all of those things. So

4:48

it is so important to change your

4:51

relationship with rejection and failure, change the meaning

4:53

you attach to it, so that

4:55

it's not something that keeps you stuck.

4:57

It's not something that holds you back. It's

4:59

no longer something you associate pain

5:01

with. It's something that you embrace.

5:04

You go full speed ahead on,

5:06

right? Because you can actually change

5:08

the meaning and change

5:10

your relationship with rejection and failure

5:12

to one where you like, you

5:15

know, you define it in a new way where you're fearless

5:17

about it. I've learned how to do this. It is

5:19

one of the most powerful things that you can

5:21

do in your life. It's

5:23

one of the most powerful things you can do

5:25

when it comes to going after your hopes and

5:27

your dreams and your goals and your

5:29

ambitions. It's literally the one

5:32

thing that can change everything.

5:35

And so here's the deal, in Worthy,

5:37

I go, there is an entire masterclass

5:39

on how to do this. It's the

5:42

longest, there's over 20 tools on building

5:44

unshakable self-worth in this book because in

5:46

life we do not become what

5:48

we want. We become what we

5:50

believe we're worthy of. There's over

5:52

20 tools in here on how to build unshakable

5:54

self-worth, but one of them is the

5:57

longest chapter in the book. It was almost,

5:59

it's entirely own book.

6:02

I just didn't want to wait longer

6:04

to get it into your hand. So

6:06

we literally put it in worthy as

6:09

one of the tools because it is so powerful.

6:12

But here's the deal. As

6:14

human beings, every single

6:16

one of us, we are wired

6:18

to avoid pain at

6:20

all costs, right? We're wired

6:22

to avoid pain. It's how we've stayed

6:25

alive forever. We're wired to avoid pain,

6:27

even if we know if we do

6:29

something. The potential outcome could be so

6:31

positive, so pleasurable, all of that. We

6:33

will still, if we associate pain with

6:35

the thing, we'll still avoid it, right?

6:37

So for a lot of us, it's

6:40

why we know if we worked out

6:42

every single day, we'd feel really

6:45

good. We may hit our

6:47

fitness goals. We may get all those things.

6:50

But when we associate pain with working out,

6:52

with going to the gym, with

6:54

moving our body, when we associate pain

6:56

with it, even though we know the

6:59

outcomes could be amazing, for

7:01

most people, we'll avoid it. We

7:04

won't do it because we want to avoid the pain

7:06

of what we associate

7:08

with working out. It's

7:10

not just similar from our goals, from our

7:12

dreams, from going after things. We know, oh,

7:15

you know what? If I golf

7:17

for it, I might make it. It

7:19

might happen. I might

7:22

bring it to life. But

7:24

then if we associate the

7:27

pain of potential rejection and

7:29

failure with going for the

7:31

thing, it's one of

7:33

the biggest reasons why we stay stuck. It's one

7:36

of the biggest reasons why we don't go for

7:38

things. It's one of the biggest reasons

7:40

why. And here's the thing, y'all. When

7:43

we have a lot

7:45

of past failures and past rejection, right?

7:49

Not only for a lot of SNA

7:51

painful, but the biggest risk

7:53

to this, if we don't change our

7:55

relationship with rejection, the biggest risk

7:57

to this is, you know, I have so many past

7:59

mistakes. and failures, right? A lot of people see my

8:01

story and they're like, oh, you built a billion dollar business from

8:03

your living room. Everything just happened

8:06

for you like a fairy tale, right? It

8:08

must've been easy. You must've got lucky. Let

8:11

me just tell you, I

8:13

went through hundreds and hundreds and

8:15

hundreds of rejections over years, teetering

8:18

on bankruptcy long before the company I

8:20

started in my living room at Cosmetics

8:22

became a household name and a billion

8:25

dollar company, right? But it was learning

8:27

how do I handle and manage and

8:30

give meaning to the

8:32

rejections as they are happening in my life

8:35

and learning to do this will change everything. So here's

8:37

the thing, why this can

8:39

be really dangerous, when you

8:41

have so much pain associated

8:44

with potential rejections or failures,

8:46

right? Or with past rejections

8:48

or failures, not only

8:50

are you likely to stay stuck because

8:53

you want to avoid that pain at all costs, not only

8:55

are you likely to not go for things or

8:58

to hesitate or to doubt yourself

9:00

out of them, but for

9:02

so many of us, this becomes a

9:04

self-worth issue because if you have

9:07

a lot of rejections and perceived failures in the

9:09

past, sometimes our

9:12

self-doubt starts to convince us we

9:15

are a failure. And

9:17

that's when it can take root at an identity level.

9:20

And number one, that is a lie. I

9:23

do not care how many

9:25

past mistakes, how many past failures

9:27

you've ever had. It

9:30

literally does not mean you're

9:32

a failure. Uh-uh, and

9:34

it does not mean you are unworthy

9:36

or somehow unqualified or incapable of accomplishing

9:38

your biggest dreams, your wildest dreams. It

9:41

does not mean, you know, if you've

9:43

had past setbacks in your business or

9:45

maybe things haven't gone as well or

9:47

you've gone out there in the dating

9:49

world and things just haven't gone your

9:51

way, your past

9:55

is not an indication of

9:57

your future. Your past does not have to do

9:59

with your future. term in your future unless you

10:01

choose to live this, right? So our

10:03

goal right now, and a huge

10:06

reason why I wrote Worthy and why

10:08

there is an entire masterclass in here

10:10

on rejection, because when we

10:12

change our relationship with it, we change everything. So

10:14

I'm going to take you through a framework right

10:16

now on how to do this in your life.

10:18

I go way deeper in the book, like deep,

10:20

deep, deep, deep, deep, deep in the book. But

10:22

let's do this right now, just

10:26

on a really cool, powerful level

10:28

together. Because when

10:31

you learn, right? So I kind of recap

10:33

how if you associate pain with

10:35

rejection and failure, then you're likely

10:37

going to just say, you're likely not

10:39

going to put yourself out there, or

10:41

you may not share your ideas at

10:44

work, just in case they're rejected. And you

10:46

don't want the pain of that. You

10:49

may not put your book out there

10:51

in the world or show up authentically

10:53

as who you truly are in social media.

10:56

I mean, this impacts every area of our

10:58

life. When we fear the potential

11:01

of rejection or failure, and we associate rejection

11:03

and failure as being negative or painful,

11:06

it will literally impact every area of your life. And

11:09

here's the deal, y'all. Everything

11:12

in life is the meaning we

11:14

attach to it. Everything,

11:17

right? So what if

11:19

I told you, you

11:21

can associate a powerful,

11:24

inspiring, empowering meaning with

11:27

rejection or failure? You

11:29

probably think like, I don't think

11:31

so, Jamie, but I'm telling you

11:33

right now, you can. You can't. And

11:37

I've learned to do it. And it's changed

11:39

everything. Literally changed everything. I

11:42

don't know. How did I not learn

11:44

to change my relationship with rejection and

11:46

failure and literally see it every time

11:49

it happens as something empowering

11:51

and inspiring? And I'll tell you how to

11:53

do it in a second. I could

11:55

have never endured the hundreds and hundreds and

11:57

hundreds of rejections that I went through for

11:59

you. years to

12:02

finally turning those no's into yeses, to

12:04

finally getting my products into stores, to

12:06

finally getting people to give me a

12:09

chance, to finally getting people to believe

12:11

in me. I

12:13

could have never kept going because it would have been too painful.

12:16

But I have literally learned to

12:18

attach positive meaning to rejection and

12:20

failure when they happen and it changed everything.

12:23

So here's how you do it. I'm going to go

12:25

through briefly the four R's in this framework. We

12:27

go deep into how to do this in Worthy.

12:31

And it's so powerful because

12:34

it literally will

12:36

change everything. So the four

12:38

R's are reveal,

12:42

redefine, revisit,

12:44

and revel. And let

12:46

me explain them to you. We're going to do them right

12:48

now together. Okay. I'll take you through just really, really high

12:50

level but we go really deep into how to do this

12:52

in all areas of your life in the book. So the

12:55

first is reveal. So, okay, I'm going to

12:57

ask you a super, super honest question and

13:00

I want you to be so honest with the answer.

13:02

And don't even think too much about it. Just the

13:04

first thing that comes to you. When

13:06

you imagine yourself getting rejected or

13:09

failing at something, what is the

13:11

first thought you have? What's

13:13

the very first thought? Very

13:17

first thought. It helps sometimes to imagine yourself

13:19

being rejected or put yourself in a situation

13:22

where something just fails that you really hoped

13:24

would work. What's the very first

13:26

thought you have? It

13:29

goes through your mind. Sometimes I don't even realizing it.

13:32

And I want you to write that down. Okay.

13:35

For so many of us, any time I ask

13:37

a group of people this and then they shout

13:39

out their answer, the things I hear

13:41

the most often are I'm not enough. I

13:45

should have even tried. I don't have what

13:47

it takes. I'm unqualified. Why did I even

13:49

think I could? I'm an idiot. I'm stupid.

13:51

I mean, some of the things people share,

13:53

I'm like, whoa. Right. For me, most of

13:56

my life, every time I got rejected or

13:58

failed at something, my first thought. Well

14:00

yeah, there's Prius. I'm not an

14:02

as. Yet. There's proof.

14:04

Again, I'm not enough. Over. And

14:06

over and over And that. Whatever.

14:09

Your first thought you just had led the

14:11

that you just sit down. Dot.

14:14

Is your courage

14:16

Definition. Of rejection and

14:18

failure at your current definition, rejection of

14:20

diet. And so I want

14:23

you to take note of. That's okay,

14:25

because here's the deal. Is

14:27

is that definition. Is painful.

14:30

And. There's a good chance that is. We.

14:33

Think it's subconsciously a don't even realize

14:35

that we want to avoid that pain

14:37

at all costs. And so if your

14:39

current definition. Projectionist L A or something

14:41

like I'm Not enough said that even

14:43

tried yeah I always say else you

14:45

know people like needle have good thing

14:47

happen to at with whatever that definition.

14:49

As if it's painful for now. It's

14:52

like with a big reason why you're

14:54

stinks, That and some areas of us.

14:57

So that is the reveal. It's It's your

14:59

current definition of what I learned to deal.

15:02

Many. Years without Early on in building my

15:04

company. Is ah, I learned

15:06

to actually read a fucking. And

15:10

meeting I gave to rejection of failure

15:12

and in a my life to limit

15:15

and stay. And in every

15:17

time a rejection failure with habit of

15:19

a catch my brain gun right to

15:21

old thought of i'm not enough know

15:23

intercept. It's a place that with this

15:25

new definition and I believed to be

15:27

true that's the key. The new one

15:30

has to be something empowering, inspiring but

15:32

that you believe to be true. And.

15:34

Cats and I'd replace that with that

15:36

new definition. And

15:38

slowly but surely it help me Fear

15:41

is se les. A brief that

15:43

more it's become more resilient and keep going

15:45

for think so. Here's how this happened: My

15:47

wife Michelle the A so I was a

15:49

season of getting so much rejection not knowing.

15:52

How they visit to the going to go under it

15:54

was. Everyone. Around me were

15:56

saying i don't believe in you or I

15:59

don't think this is gonna wear or any

16:01

of these things Rape. And

16:03

one day I was so down

16:05

as good a crying into my

16:07

covers after another really painful rejection

16:09

from Ah Qvc was had always

16:11

dreamed of going on at my

16:13

whole life. And and then when

16:15

I launched. The Business as I called as

16:18

a Finity professor mr my part of the live

16:20

television for one hundred million. Homes. Improve a

16:22

work and I just knew what was

16:24

going to happen And I was manifesting

16:26

and playing. About it all the thing

16:28

and after sending them products for years and

16:31

always hearing know I finally got on a

16:33

call with the head of all Beauty

16:35

of Hobby to division. Marriage she said

16:37

no you're not the is fit

16:39

pressure for as as summers it's

16:41

unanimous our buyers. It's a know

16:44

it was too painful projection at

16:46

the time and I just was

16:48

crying in a member googling at

16:50

that moment. Every person I admired

16:52

most should change. The. World And he

16:54

thought leader. As a person should

16:57

have need of humanity forward to become a force

16:59

for. Good and West for love

17:01

in the world. Every business leaders,

17:03

adult iconic companies. And.

17:06

Ya every person I googled

17:08

I realized oh my gosh.

17:11

They've. Hi. Outlets rejections

17:13

and failures in their lives. Dentist.

17:16

The brave ones willing to keep going anywhere.

17:19

And. That day I rode out this

17:21

new definition. Reject.

17:24

Your failures not mean I'm not in a. Rejection.

17:27

Of failure news. I would have

17:29

the brave ones willing to go for it.

17:32

But. I'm not going to be a person sitting on

17:34

the sidelines the like living in. Regret that I'm

17:36

stuck. Can never go for it.

17:38

Every rejectionist two years. Ago.

17:43

Victory It mean we

17:45

should be. Paid

17:48

and. i believe that you be

17:50

true and that's the key i know

17:53

to be true so when i started

17:55

doing it each time another rejection another

17:57

it's nice fair and others said back

17:59

another you know critic another person

18:01

saying you know your business is never gonna

18:03

make it every time that would happen of

18:05

course Right my neuro pathways in

18:07

my brain their car deep for all of us It

18:10

would first want to go to that old thing

18:12

saying I'm not enough, but I would catch it

18:14

I'd intercept it and I would instantly go. Oh,

18:16

this is a manly. I just got rejected. You know why?

18:20

It's another reminder. I am one of

18:22

the brave ones willing to go for

18:24

it This is amazing and I

18:26

started actually associating. I'm not even

18:28

kidding associating positive

18:31

empowering inspiring meaning

18:33

to rejection another

18:36

one another definition

18:38

I wrote out was rejection of

18:40

God's protection and I

18:43

will read that to be true and for

18:45

you it may be rejections God's protection It

18:47

may be rejections the universe of protection, right

18:49

whatever speaks true to your soul and Every

18:52

time I would get a rejection that just didn't make sense Right

18:55

like somebody maybe just you know I

18:57

don't know betrayed my trust or just

18:59

didn't see my value or you know

19:01

or Whatever it might

19:03

be I put myself out there and you

19:06

know Weekly

19:10

coffee or whatever it might be right and and

19:12

we all get rejections like this all the time

19:14

and Every time

19:16

it started happening when that rejection didn't

19:18

make sense. I would always say rejections

19:20

God's protection and I would trust it

19:23

There was a really painful rejection I got once

19:25

with a potential investor who I thought was gonna

19:27

like sing of our company and He

19:29

had the very end after so many meetings

19:32

and presentations and the very end he

19:34

said It's a no we're

19:36

gonna pass on investing into cosmetics And

19:39

when I asked him why he was really quiet for

19:41

a long time and eventually said you want me to

19:43

be really honest with you And I said yes, please

19:46

and he said I just don't think women

19:48

will buy makeup from someone who looks like you

19:50

with your body And your weight and

19:53

for me in that moment and that

19:55

particular rejection I never

19:57

felt any anger toward him. I instantly felt a

19:59

lot lifelong, like

20:02

my body flooded with self-doubt,

20:04

body doubt, a lifetime of body doubt,

20:06

right? So I felt like my own

20:08

fear, like it looked like I was staring

20:10

my own fear straight in the eye when I was hearing this from

20:13

him. And I

20:15

went and cried in my car after, but

20:17

then I remember just making this decision that

20:19

this rejection does not mean my business isn't

20:21

going to make it. Rejection

20:23

is God's protection. So I don't

20:26

know why, but God's protecting

20:28

me from something right now. And

20:31

I believe that in my soul, right? That

20:34

was the moment that particular rejection I decided

20:36

to assign that meaning to it. Well,

20:39

fast forward six years later when, and by the

20:41

way, let me just say this. At the time,

20:43

I didn't know how my business is

20:45

going to make it. I was so desperate. I probably

20:47

would have given him the majority of the whole company

20:50

for like nothing, right? Just to try and

20:52

make sure our company stayed alive. Because

20:55

he did not believe in me, six years

20:58

later when my business had grown and

21:00

grown and grown and grown, we had over

21:02

a thousand employees and L'Oreal bought my

21:04

business for over a billion dollars cash. It

21:07

was the first time I heard from him, that

21:09

potential investor in over six years. He

21:11

said, congratulations on the L'Oreal deal. I

21:14

was wrong. And

21:18

it reminded me so much of that movie, Pretty Woman, when

21:20

they wouldn't help her in the store. Remember

21:22

that? And then she goes back in. And what

21:25

I wanted to say to him at the time was

21:27

big mistake. Huge,

21:29

huge. I can give

21:31

you a one point cute billion reason why it was a

21:33

huge mistake. But I didn't. I

21:35

kept it classy. But I remember y'all

21:37

in that moment. I

21:40

was like, oh my gosh, had

21:42

he believed in me then, I would have given him

21:44

the majority of the company for almost nothing to stay

21:46

alive. And all of a sudden, six

21:48

years later, when I sold the business,

21:51

I was still the largest shareholder. Paulo

21:54

and I were still the largest shareholders, my husband,

21:56

right? So I'm like, okay, protections,

21:59

God's protection. And sometimes we

22:01

don't see why it's happening. And

22:04

so I want to bring this up because when

22:07

you're in a moment of rejection, we have

22:09

choices. We can say to ourselves,

22:11

oh, this means I'm not enough. I'm never going

22:13

to make it. We can use those old painful

22:15

definitions. But when

22:17

we have new definitions that we replace

22:19

the old ones with every time it

22:22

happens, we start to build resiliency.

22:24

We start to actually be confused

22:26

toward rejection failure. And that's what happened for me.

22:28

And I just kept going and kept going and kept going

22:30

and kept going because I didn't fear it anymore. I didn't

22:32

fear rejection or failure anymore. And I

22:34

believe it is one of the keys on how I built

22:37

the business. Otherwise, so many of us are tempted to give

22:39

up after one rejection or 20 or 30. Right.

22:43

And so I think revealing your

22:45

current one, but then redefining

22:47

it is so huge. Right. So, so,

22:49

so huge. And it's so easy to

22:51

do. I mean, another one is I

22:54

was adopted. I was placed into adoption

22:56

the day I was born. And growing

22:59

up, I had the best parents

23:01

who loved me so much, but they worked

23:03

a lot. I was always alone. And I

23:06

went through as an adult, as

23:08

an adult finding out I was adopted and

23:10

then kind of just processing all of it.

23:12

I went through a long season of feeling

23:14

like abandonment, you

23:16

know, like, oh, my parents worked all growing up. I

23:19

was always alone. I was always abandoned or oh,

23:21

you know, I was placed into adoption. I was a bit. So

23:23

I kind of had this narrative.

23:26

And I decided one day, oh, I

23:29

use this tool in my own

23:31

personal life. I'm like, oh, I

23:33

wasn't abandoned. I was chosen. Like

23:36

I was chosen by my birth mom to carry

23:38

me. Her life probably would have been way easier

23:40

if she didn't. I was

23:43

chosen by God to come into this

23:45

world. I was chosen by my adoptive

23:47

parents to raise me. I was chosen.

23:51

And I made a decision to believe that. Changes

23:53

everything. Right. So the first R is

23:55

to reveal your current definition for me.

23:57

It's oh, yeah, I'm not an adult.

23:59

right? And then and then the second

24:02

R is to replace it with that

24:04

new empowering definition. So you can use

24:06

one, two, three, four, many

24:08

new redefined

24:10

empowering definitions. And then

24:13

the third step is to

24:15

revisit. Revisit. And

24:17

what this means is that there is

24:19

a painful rejection in your past or

24:22

failure, maybe many, and you've been

24:24

hanging on to them as if they

24:26

define who you are or are

24:28

some indication of your worth. You

24:31

can actually revisit past

24:33

rejection, realize what is

24:36

the meaning I've been assigned to those and

24:39

redefine the past rejection.

24:43

This is huge. And for a lot

24:45

of us, it is just liberating and

24:47

so, so powerful. So one of my

24:50

favorite ways to do this, my favorite

24:53

revisiting redefinition

24:56

is I often will think of,

24:59

and maybe this has happened to you even recently,

25:01

somebody who betrayed your trust or

25:03

didn't show up for you like you

25:05

wish they did or pulled the rug

25:08

out from underneath you, didn't see your

25:10

value, broke your heart, you know, any

25:12

of these things, the job you applied

25:14

for, you don't know why, but you

25:16

didn't get it. I

25:19

revisit these rejections and even now when

25:21

they happen to this day, my favorite

25:24

definition to give them is this. I

25:28

literally will imagine my creator. I

25:30

will imagine God saying to me, Oh, you

25:33

weren't rejected. I

25:36

hid your value from them

25:38

because they're not assigned to

25:40

your destiny. And I believe

25:42

it. Y'all I will believe it. So even

25:44

right now, if I have

25:46

a friend betray my trust or somebody just pulls

25:48

the rug out from underneath me or, you

25:51

know, or, or, or I

25:53

get rejected or I don't get the thing I'm

25:55

hoping for, or I'm not

25:57

invited to the party or, you

25:59

know, friend has a big event and doesn't

26:01

have me speak or whatever it might be. I

26:05

just think to myself or an in-law, I don't

26:08

know why, I don't know what I do, I

26:10

don't feel like they value me. Right? It

26:13

doesn't matter what example, we all have these examples

26:15

in our life every single day. Instead

26:17

of feeling rejected and

26:20

you know like

26:22

I don't belong and fit in, I

26:24

literally make the decision to believe

26:28

and imagine God saying to

26:31

me, oh no no, you weren't rejected. I

26:33

hid your value from them because

26:35

they're not assigned to your destiny. And

26:38

that helps me embrace any

26:40

time someone rejects me. Right?

26:42

It helps me look at Pastor Jepsen's

26:44

and just have this trust that

26:47

God was just hiding my value from them because they're

26:49

not assigned to my destiny. And no matter what you

26:51

believe, having that kind of faith

26:53

is huge because again it

26:56

helps you build resiliency, helps you

26:58

fear, you know, potential or

27:00

future rejections or setbacks or failures

27:02

and helps you get unstuck and go for that.

27:05

Because again, and I go deep into where they

27:07

had how to do this, but we can

27:09

manifest all day long and pray and do all

27:11

the things. But it's deep

27:13

down inside, we associate so

27:16

much pain with potentially failing at

27:18

him or we believe we're

27:20

a failure and deep down inside we don't believe

27:22

we're worthy of the thing. We

27:25

can manifest, pray, work hard, go after it, get

27:27

all the skills all day long. We still won't

27:29

go for it. We'll still stay stuck or we'll

27:31

still sabotage it. Learning

27:33

to believe you are worthy

27:36

and learning to redefine and

27:38

change your relationship with rejection and

27:40

failure changes everything. So the final

27:43

R is rebel, rebel

27:45

in the fact that you are fearless

27:47

when it comes to potential rejection and

27:49

failure. And I have to say that,

27:52

you know, I Did a lot of

27:55

things wrong, building a cosmetic, made so many mistakes

27:57

and then now in my life every single day.

28:00

The whole lot of things I'm working on

28:02

that I believe in the power. Being a

28:04

lifelong students I believe that this is a

28:06

lifelong thirty especially a building like why I

28:09

wrote worthy of. Because in life we don't

28:11

become what we want, we become what we

28:13

believe a worthy of and learn to build

28:15

that and she couple self worth inside which

28:18

is very different than so confident sub pop.

28:20

It can fluctuate based on everything going on

28:22

around us but self worth is deep, it's

28:24

internal and shake a boss and learning how

28:27

to raise that self worth it is a

28:29

life long journey. And so the fourth

28:31

are though is reveling in the fact that

28:33

you no longer fear of rejection of failure.

28:36

It at this point my life I am

28:38

growing. And a lot of areas working hard

28:40

improve in a lot of areas I will

28:42

say and pretty fearless. Become the

28:44

rejection of failure. Seven. Save

28:46

Me! I literally believe. All

28:49

the definitions I shared with you and many

28:51

more. sense it because the to. A

28:53

tool in your toolbox on how

28:55

to build software. How do you

28:57

know? Build Resilience on how to

28:59

get on that. And go

29:02

for the thing that you. Are. Put

29:04

on this earth a hard to

29:06

deal because here's the thing. Self

29:09

doubt shows more dream numbers anything else.

29:11

And there are so many moments in

29:13

my life where I came so close

29:16

to doubting myself out of my own

29:18

destiny. No. More no More

29:20

And this is one of it's full of.

29:22

I found it's just. Like.

29:25

Changing and so many areas. So help

29:28

you. Loved it! And again we go

29:30

deep into how to do that in

29:32

the forties and then there's often were

29:34

tool of on it at where the

29:36

book.com. As well. As

29:38

here's the deal with you, Believe you are in

29:40

this. You. Transform your entire life. And if

29:43

right now you're sitting there silhouettes and

29:45

still think I'm a nap and a

29:47

struggle with it. You're. Not alone, eighty

29:49

percent of women. That. We they're not

29:51

seventy three percent a man's feel that they're

29:54

in added fits. This is a real big

29:56

thing, but there are tools and how to

29:58

overcome it because it's. A lot. I

30:02

don't hear so many purposes. Or fillers

30:04

you had and a curse. You know

30:06

who you feel you've hurt and what

30:08

you're a great car and the labels

30:10

even putting on yourself and all of

30:13

that new right now I fully worthy

30:15

exactly as you are. Nothing you need

30:17

to do to earn it as not

30:19

no one can take it away from

30:21

you. but the biggest journey were on

30:23

his I'm learning those live at Leeds.

30:25

A soft. Out and then

30:27

waking up does truth

30:29

that build worthiness that.

30:31

That were these all about And

30:34

that is where that is completely

30:36

possible in your life no matter

30:38

what happened in the past. amount

30:40

of the situation here in my

30:42

mouth and love you feel. I

30:44

believe in heels and you. Are

30:46

worthy.