You're a night watchmen at the Smithsonian. You spend your time in between rounds by watching season 2 of Togetherness. You dread finishing each episode as you know you are moving closer to the end. It's about time to make your rounds again. Ev

16: The One With All The Root Beer

May 21st, 2019 1h 18m

After a long hiatus, your heroes return to talk about all the things you love to hear us talk about, like the VitaCoco piss-in-a-bottle thing and the films of Stuart Gordon. We also rank 5 different root beers in a blind taste test. What is thi

The Bargain Bin 1: Duke Nukem Forever

Nov 26th, 2018 32m 9s

We interrupt your regularly scheduled podcast feed to bring you something new. Join hosts Andrew, PJ, and Aaron as they wade through video games forgotten to time to see if they deserve to be remembered. Welcome to The Bargain Bin: A Bad Videog

15: The REAL Halloween Special

Oct 31st, 2018 1h 30m

You're in a theatre. Looking in your hands you find a bucket of popcorn you don't remember paying for. No one around you seems to be missing their movie-going concessions. The trailers start and you see a woman. Her cell begins to ring. Face wh

14: Tony's Paranormal Construction

Oct 19th, 2018 1h 32m

In this extra long special episode, the boys play Who's on First, except with who played Elsa from Frozen, Aaron hosts the podcast by himself for a bit, and Andrew survived a haunted mansion and all he got was this lousy t-shirt. Due to technic

13: spiderman hot coffee mod how

Sep 20th, 2018 1h 11m

Aaron interrogates Andrew about his new pets, through which they discover the star studded cast of G-Force 2(?!). Andrew talks a lot about the new Spider-Man game.Things Discussed:Andrew's new children |G-Force (2009) (https://www.imdb.com/

12: All Feds are Cops

Sep 6th, 2018 57m 32s

Longing. Rusted. Poopaye. Dawn. Gooba. Nine. Bum bum. Homecoming. Banana. Good morning, Soldier. You are ready to comply. Your targets are the hosts of the podcast Across the Lake. Aaron was last seen at an IKEA, browsing the store and praising

11: Michael Chiclets

Aug 30th, 2018 53m 45s

11: Michael Chiclets by Aaron Hillsamer & Andrew Darling

10: Super Smash Bros. Dreams Collection

Aug 16th, 2018 1h 5m

After a long, impromptu break, Aaron wrestles with the realization that even our heroes die, Andrew wonders if Nintendo is deliberately holding your nostalgia hostage, and both boys can't get enough Queer Eye (who can?). //Things Discussed:T

9: Big Horse

Jun 28th, 2018 1h 14m

The guys took a week off and are back! It feels like that phrase appears a lot, but alas, here we are. A lot of time is spent talking about horses in Breath of the Wild, but somehow, even more time is spent talking about IKEA. Podcasts, huh? //

8: Pac-Sun

Jun 15th, 2018 59m 55s

This week the boys makes the yearly sacrifice: ignoring their loved ones and responsibilities, to consume the Electronic Entertainment Expo's offerings. Was it worth it? Is it ever? Tune in to find out. //Things Discussed:E3 |Jump Force: h

7: Bret Michaels: The Link Of Love

Jun 7th, 2018 54m 22s

We're back! A lot has changed in the last month. Andrew moved. Everything broke. But it's all good now. We can finally deliver that mediocre content you all crave. This week the fellas wonder what would a Legend of Zelda dating show look like?

An Auditory Nightmare of an Apology

May 17th, 2018 9m 11s

If you can't listen past the initial awfulness of this, here's the short of it: we have been having numerous technical problems with recording, and on top of that, Andrew is getting ready to make a big move in the coming weeks, so, unfortunatel

6: The Matrix Rap That Never Was

May 10th, 2018 53m 3s

Aaron had computer troubles this week, so instead of your regularly scheduled program, we go back in time. The Big Sick has just come out, Aaron is watching GLOW, apparently, and Andrew isn't sure if he's in the right universe. //Things Discu

5: Captain American Chopper

May 3rd, 2018 1h

It's a special sleepy episode. It could be ASMR if Andrew wasn't yelling the whole time. The boys stayed up way to late and try to talk about Nintendo's cardboard and Infinity War while maintaining coherent thought. Try. Listen to this one at 2

4: Good Dad, Quiet Dad

Apr 26th, 2018 1h 6m

Make sure to listen to this episode with headphones on, or the ear monsters will getcha! Aaron and Andrew discuss the recently released horror film A Quiet Place, which, naturally, devolves in to a discussion about the quality of the Tremors fi

3: Enough About Reggie's Lips

Apr 19th, 2018 1h 7m

This week, the boys do a little spooky radio theatre to kick things off. Then talk about their adventures in the post apocalyptic worlds of Breath of the Wild (where Aaron is chased by bees) and Mad Max (where Andrew is doing some chasing of hi

2: Anyway, Whatever, Fuck It

Apr 11th, 2018 56m 27s

It's a vacation recap episode of Across the Lake. In our second episode, we talk shit about the cities we visited over the last few weeks. Aaron's car is destroyed for the sake of knowledge and Andrew eats at a Very Good Taco Bell.---Requir

1: Dry Rub Shampoo

Apr 7th, 2018 1h 10m

Two friends. Separated by the second largest body of fresh water in North America. But not even that will stop them from asking stupid bullshit like: Did your mom write Black Sabbath's Iron Man? What is the dark connection between Buffalo Wild

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