0:04

Countdown with Keith Olderman is a production

0:07

of I Heart Radio. The

0:26

senior Senator from Arizona

0:28

should resign if

0:30

her goal is to challenge Tulsei Gabbard

0:32

for the role of Tulsei Gabbard. Get

0:35

moving. In the event of a resignation,

0:37

the governor of Arizona is obligated to a point

0:39

somebody from the party of the ex senator in

0:41

question. So get moving, get

0:44

out, get a real Democrat

0:46

on the job, get a real senator on the job,

0:48

get a real American on the job, and

0:51

get that show on Fox News channel

0:53

you want, or news Max or Fascism.

0:55

Today, Kirsten

0:58

Cinema still lists herself as

1:00

a Democrat. I do not know

1:02

why Kirsten Cinemas

1:04

still claims to represent Arizona. Again. I

1:06

do not know why Kirsten

1:09

Cinema still insists she is dedicated

1:11

to bipartisan solutions. Again,

1:13

I do not know why she might as well be

1:16

a Republican now, Kirsten

1:18

Cinema still maintains she is a member

1:20

of an advocate for the lgbt

1:23

Q community. Again, I do not know

1:25

why she is standing aside as

1:27

Republicans move to erase lgbt

1:30

Q rights, her own rights. Kirsten

1:33

Cinema still maintains she respects

1:35

and protects the Senate, and again,

1:38

I do not know why she

1:40

is siding with those who would dismantle

1:43

democracy. The Senator

1:45

has not conducted a town hall in Ariansona

1:47

since being elected to the Senate, but now

1:49

she has managed to find the time to

1:52

speak at what amounts to a campaign event

1:54

for the upcoming midterms, a campaign

1:56

event for Mitch McConnell and the Republicans

1:59

and against the Democratic Party, at

2:01

which she predicted the Democrats will lose

2:03

the House, at which she trashed

2:05

the party that got her elected. And

2:08

she did this at the McConnell's

2:10

Center at the University of Louisville, named

2:13

for the most caliving and destructive

2:15

Republican in history who is not named

2:18

Donald Trump. Despite

2:20

our apparent differences, Senator

2:22

Cinema said, Senator McConnell and

2:25

I have forged a friendship, one

2:27

that is rooted in our commonalities,

2:29

including our respect for the Senate

2:32

as an institution. Kirsten,

2:35

you know god damned well that

2:37

six years ago it was McConnell who

2:39

made up out of thin air with utter

2:42

disrespect both for the Senate and the

2:44

concept of democracy, a rule that

2:46

somehow permitted him to filibuster

2:49

against even holding a hearing

2:51

for a potential Supreme Court justice

2:53

nominated by a democratic president.

2:56

And he followed up this extra legal,

2:58

extra constitutional perfidy

3:00

by quite literally stealing that Supreme

3:03

Court seat for his own political

3:05

party and his political party's only

3:07

goal, only aspiration, only

3:10

policy, only purpose power.

3:14

It was an utter, shameless, fatal

3:16

assassination of the Senate of

3:18

bi partisanship, of everything the

3:20

country is meant to be and everything

3:23

you give lip service to, and

3:25

its replacement by brute political

3:27

force. And Kirsten, you went to

3:30

Louisville and kissed this disgusting

3:33

scumbag McConnell's ass

3:35

and invalidating him. You

3:37

have become an accessory

3:39

after the fact to the elimination

3:41

of Roe v. Wade. So, not only

3:44

am I committed to the sixty vote threshold,

3:46

I have an incredibly unpopular view. I

3:49

actually think we should restore the sixty vote

3:51

threshold. For the areas in which it

3:53

has been eliminated already, we should

3:55

restore it. YEA. Not

3:58

everyone likes that the

4:00

sixty vote threshold to confirm

4:03

a nominee to the Supreme Court. Kirsten

4:05

was eliminated by Mitch

4:07

McConnell in two thousand seventeen.

4:10

McConnell has carefully and with excellent

4:12

precision eliminated all those instances

4:15

in which a sixty vote threshold would

4:17

thwart the political aims of the

4:19

party representing the minority in this country,

4:21

the Republicans, while preserving

4:24

the sixty vote threshold for use when

4:26

it would thwart the party representing the majority

4:28

in this country, the Democrats. And he has

4:30

done so with your help,

4:33

with your blind, arrogant,

4:36

condescending collaboration with

4:38

an enemy of this democracy.

4:41

Moreover, Mitch McConnell has

4:44

repeatedly vetoed the actions

4:46

of the Democratic House, and

4:48

you have the nerve to

4:51

applaud him. When Republicans

4:53

are in control, they passed a little bit of crazy legislation.

4:56

And when the Democrats are in control, they

4:58

pass a little bit of crazy legislation. And

5:00

the job of the Senate is

5:03

to cool that passion. Oh, everybody

5:05

in Washington is just so crazy.

5:09

During your time in the Senate,

5:12

the Senate has confirmed three

5:14

Supreme Court justices who lied about

5:17

overturning Roe v. Wade to the Senate,

5:19

and then overturned Roe V. Wade. During

5:22

your time in the Senate, one

5:24

of its senior members has introduced legislation

5:27

to limit abortions nationally, and

5:29

others have pronounced their willingness to legislate

5:32

against same sex marriage and even

5:34

interracial marriage. During your

5:36

time in the Senate, it has twice acquitted

5:39

the most treacherous and anti democratic

5:41

leader in the history of democracy

5:44

in impeachment votes. During

5:46

your time in the Senate, many of

5:48

its members sided with an attempt

5:51

to overturn the presidential election

5:53

by subterfuge or violence

5:56

or both. During your time

5:59

in the Senate, an actual palace

6:01

coup was attempted against the United

6:04

States of a America for the first time

6:06

in its history. But go on, Kirsten,

6:08

tell me more about how the Democrats

6:11

pass a little bit of crazy legislation,

6:14

but you and the Senate are there

6:16

to cool that passion. So

6:18

why in recent years does

6:21

it seem like partisanship has gotten worse

6:23

and worse in Washington?

6:26

Our politics have become increasingly

6:28

radicalized, spiraling steadily

6:31

downward into bitter and tribal

6:33

extremism. Cable

6:35

news pundits, outside groups,

6:38

and some political leaders on both sides of the

6:40

aisle have led the loudest and

6:42

most extreme voices in each

6:45

party dominate the discourse

6:47

and set the agenda because it stokes

6:50

anger and it gets tweets, views,

6:53

clicks, but it doesn't

6:55

solve problems. The nerve

6:58

the goal who

7:01

radicalized our politics,

7:04

Kirsten, who lead

7:06

the spiral into tribal extremism

7:09

and an attempt to sack the US capital

7:12

and hang the Vice president the President

7:14

of the Senate. That you're a member of the

7:17

Democrats, you referred to as they

7:20

did they do that? Are you

7:22

going to try to both sides?

7:25

January six, Really,

7:27

the danger of elimiting the sixty vote threshold

7:29

is that the Senate becomes the House. And I

7:32

remind everyone I I left the House and ran for the

7:34

Senate for a reason. That

7:38

reason, Kirsten, as we

7:40

both know, was personal ambition.

7:43

Twenty years ago, you wrote a letter published by

7:45

the Arizona Republic quote, until

7:48

the average American realizes that capitalism

7:51

damages her livelihood while augmenting

7:53

the livelihoods of the wealthy, the

7:55

almighty dollar will continue to

7:57

rule. But last month,

8:00

as your price for voting for the Inflation

8:02

Reduction Act, you personally detected

8:05

a tax loophole that means millions

8:07

for private equity executives, law

8:10

firm partners, and hedge fund

8:12

managers, or as you might call them,

8:15

ordinary everyday Americans.

8:18

But the best thing you can do for your child is to not give

8:20

them everything they want, right and

8:22

that's important to the United States Senate as well.

8:25

We shouldn't get everything we want in

8:27

the moment, Kirsten, what

8:29

the hell does that mean? This

8:32

is the opportune moment for me to explain

8:35

what the hell I mean? Why I have been addressing

8:37

a senior senator from Arizona, not by

8:39

her title, but by her first name. I

8:41

believe I was the first broadcaster

8:44

to put Kirsten Cinema on national television

8:46

when she was in local politics in Arizona,

8:49

and from that grew a friendship that lasted

8:51

for nearly eight years. We even

8:53

dated briefly, not while she

8:56

was a guest on my shows, but long enough that

8:58

twice I took her to the Broadway show

9:00

Book of Mormon, and as a real life

9:03

X Mormon, she was delighted to go backstage

9:05

and meet the cast and complement one of the producers

9:08

on the exactitude of the recreation

9:10

of Mormons Sunday School stories,

9:13

and we stood in front of the theater late into

9:15

the night, talking politics with many of

9:17

the actors and stage staff. And in

9:19

that crowd, me and a bunch

9:21

of Broadway performers whose livelihoods

9:24

consisted of savaging a religion

9:26

every night. In that crowd, Kirsten

9:29

Cinema was hands down the

9:32

most liberal, the most

9:34

progressive, the

9:36

most to hell with them

9:38

of all of us, and the

9:41

most intelligent, not

9:44

even close. And in

9:46

that crowd she proudly proclaimed to

9:48

us not only what she had publicly revealed

9:51

previously about her personal life, but

9:53

also that she was utterly opposed to monogamous

9:55

relationships and thus, as she termed

9:57

it, breeding like members

10:00

of her family had. So you will excuse

10:02

me if in this sea of her disingenuo

10:04

was condescending phony piety.

10:07

That remark that jumps out at me as the

10:09

most disingenuously condescending

10:12

and the most phonally pious is

10:14

telling anybody what is the best thing they

10:16

can do for their child. I

10:20

am going to say something now, and I

10:22

do not expect it will be widely believed.

10:26

There is no personal animus

10:29

here. She and I did not

10:31

stop dating because of some discord.

10:34

We continued to go to events together as

10:36

late as a year after the last date.

10:39

Kirsten Cinema and I texted for

10:41

six years after our last date.

10:43

Half of the text were about politics and who was gonna

10:46

stop Trump. Half were her trying to set me

10:48

up with women she had dated, or her asking

10:50

if my latest girlfriend was hot. We

10:52

were close enough that in two thousand and ten it

10:54

had been Kirsten Cinema who asked me

10:56

to make late donations in literally the closing

10:59

days of the campaigns of Gabby

11:01

Gifford's and Raoul Grijalva and

11:03

Jack Conway, after my coverage

11:06

of them for MSNBC had ended

11:08

because each of them had been swamped with

11:10

death threats and they had to spend

11:12

double their planned budgets on security.

11:15

And those donations led to NBC's

11:17

unsuccessful attempt to suspend

11:19

me, even though my contract gave me the

11:21

right to make the donation's. Ultimately

11:23

it led to my decision to leave MSNBC

11:26

in January two thousand and eleven,

11:28

when I took countdown to Current TV. Kirsten

11:31

remained enough of a friend that she went with

11:33

me as a regular guest when

11:35

in private moments she speculated about

11:37

running for presidents someday. I encouraged

11:41

her. Her perspective,

11:43

her resume, her ardor for change

11:45

and for justice seemed to offer

11:48

hope in a century from which it has

11:50

rapidly drained. There

11:52

really is no personal

11:55

animus here, maybe

11:58

deep confused

12:01

disappointment. For

12:05

years I would not violate my own

12:07

vow of privacy about private

12:09

lives, mine

12:12

or hers. She asked

12:14

me to be her data at a Young Progressives event

12:16

in Washington in two thousand and ten, and

12:18

a day after I said yes, I

12:20

walked her through the ethical problems with it and the

12:22

publicity possibilities, so we skipped

12:25

it. I didn't even publicly acknowledge

12:27

that we were friends until two thousand seventeen

12:29

or two thousand eighteen. That's

12:31

when I felt my comments required some admission

12:34

of a personal relationship. And

12:36

as Kirsten Cinema's performance in the Senate,

12:39

her performance as a Democrat, her

12:41

performance as an American has gotten

12:44

more and more nightmarish, I have

12:46

felt that more and more information needed to be revealed,

12:48

and I have done so now, even if it meant some tweaking

12:51

on social media as a result, and

12:53

there are other things to say about my friendship

12:56

and my relationship with Kirsten Cinema. Try

12:58

as I might, and I have tried four months, and

13:00

I have tried four years, I have not convinced

13:03

myself that it is right to say any of them.

13:05

I just know that the Kirsten Cinema

13:07

act life as the most liberal

13:10

of liberals, a self proclaimed prodest

13:12

socialist, the trip from the Green Party

13:14

to the blue Dog Democrats is

13:17

only that an act.

13:20

It is two or three years now since I got

13:22

tired of the act of her condescension,

13:25

piety, and her performance art. That

13:28

I got tired of her fraudulence and her hypocrisy,

13:30

That I got tired of her fealty to the moneyed

13:33

interests. That I got tired of her portrayal

13:35

of the voiceless people she once spoke

13:38

for but has now insulted. That I

13:40

got tired of the fact that from genuine

13:42

liberality in the finest sense of

13:44

the word, and personal intelligence

13:46

that earned the description of brilliance,

13:48

she has deteriorated into

13:50

just another politician available

13:53

for sale to the highest bidder, and worst

13:55

of all, someone who has irretrievably

13:58

signed away her principles in

14:00

order to join the vast media

14:03

political complay the industry

14:05

that is government in which there is only

14:08

process, not policy, and

14:10

never people. I wrote it on

14:12

Twitter yesterday and I repeat it here.

14:15

This is the perfect solution, sadly,

14:18

for the nightmare that is Kirsten Cinema

14:20

in the US Senate, best friend

14:23

of Mitch freaking McConnell.

14:25

She should resign as the senior

14:27

Senator from Arizona and take

14:30

over as the host of

14:33

Meet the Press, still

14:45

ahead on countdown. You do not want to be Mark Meadows

14:47

right now, nor Liz trusts

14:49

about whom they are asking which British

14:52

prime minister had the shortest tenure, not

14:54

counting her judge,

14:57

not less she be judged. The home run

14:59

watch continues to paraphrase

15:01

the serious TV commercial for Brett Farves

15:03

radio show. It's Burst Brett's

15:06

Bubble time. They have shelved his program

15:08

because of that scandal. And in worse

15:11

persons, how could you become a U

15:13

S Senator and not know the correct answer

15:15

to the following question what

15:17

is the most common way? One refers

15:19

to the day that terrorists

15:21

attacked the Pentagon and the World Trade

15:24

Center, A sitting United

15:26

States Senator has

15:28

gotten it wrong. That's

15:31

next. This discountdown. This

15:38

is Countdown with Keith Olberman

15:45

still ahead on Countdown. Yes. In two thousand

15:47

nine, MSNBC almost went off

15:49

the air. They almost replaced all

15:51

of us with reruns of Lock

15:54

Up for Why, because

15:57

the chairman of the world's six largest

15:59

corporations said, so, that's why

16:01

things I promised not to tell. Coming up first.

16:04

In each edition Countdown, we feature a dog in need

16:06

whom you can help. Every dog has its day.

16:08

Patty Cake Refuge saves dogs

16:10

from the streets of the Bahamas and

16:13

often brings them here to the States. Used

16:15

as a breeding dog, Edda was gradually

16:18

starved and then dumped and left

16:20

to die. She has been discovered in the bushes

16:22

down to twenty three pounds. That's

16:24

not more than a third of what she should weigh.

16:27

Remarkably, she is still alive and fighting

16:29

and has the light of survival in her eyes. The

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Refuge could use your help to feed

16:33

her and overcome her infections and anemia.

16:36

They have started a fundraiser on giving

16:38

Grid, so you can go there search

16:41

Eda E D d A or just

16:43

go to my account for dogs in Need. Tom

16:45

Jumbo Grumbo on Twitter and look

16:47

for my tweet about Eda and

16:50

thank you very much. We're doing so coming

17:02

up Aaron Judge watch continues,

17:05

which would tell you what happened last night in the Yankee

17:08

game and the senator who doesn't

17:10

know it was called nine eleven.

17:13

First postscripts to the news, some headlines, some

17:15

commentary, some snark. Dateline

17:23

Washington. Former January sixth

17:25

Committee advisor Denver Riggleman

17:27

says the texts of former Trump Chief

17:29

of Staff Mark Meadows and the text

17:32

to Meadows are the crown jewels

17:34

of the investigation that Meadows received

17:37

texts from thirty nine different

17:39

House members and from five U. S.

17:41

Senators between November and

17:43

the inauguration of President Biden. CNN

17:46

reports Meadows also got one text

17:48

at least from Phil Waldron, one

17:50

of the voter fraud conspiracy nuts,

17:53

and NBC News says oathkeeper

17:55

and Oathkeeper Attorney Kelly Sorell

17:58

texted White House Legacy hire

18:00

Andrew Giuliani and also tried to

18:02

text the White House itself but

18:04

sent that text to the White House switchboard.

18:09

Another super genius

18:11

dateline London. The new fiscal policies

18:14

of the new UK Prime Minister Liz Trust

18:16

they're not exactly going over well with

18:18

the pound crashing and such. A new you

18:21

gov poll for the Times of London shows

18:23

the opposition Labor Party with a seventeen

18:26

point lead over the ruling

18:28

Conservatives. That's the biggest margin in the poll's

18:31

history, if you're wondering. The

18:33

shortest tenure ever for British Prime

18:35

Minister was of George Canning

18:38

hundred nineteen days on the job in eighteen

18:40

twenty seven, with a pretty good explanation he

18:43

died. Prime Minister Trust

18:45

has been in office for twenty three days. Ten

18:47

of those were essentially days off because

18:50

of mourning for Queen Elizabeth and Dateline

18:52

McKinney. Texas, in an AFFIDAVI

18:55

had filed late yesterday, a process server

18:57

informs the court that he went to the home

18:59

of Texas Attorney General Kent Paxton

19:01

to give him a subpoena for a federal court

19:03

hearing today in a lawsuit by

19:06

nonprofit groups who want the State of Texas

19:08

to pay for out of state abortions.

19:10

In the filing, server Anesto Martine

19:13

Herrera, reports that as he got to Paxton's

19:15

home, the Attorney General fled

19:19

in a truck with his wife

19:22

at the wheel. Everything is

19:24

bigger in Texas, especially

19:26

the Cowards. This

19:40

is Sports Center, Wait,

19:43

check that not anymore.

19:45

This is countdown

19:49

with Keith in Sports

19:52

to on two out, top of the tenth,

19:54

Aaron Judge do up, still at sixty home

19:56

runs for the season. Rookie Toronto manager

19:58

John Schneider still try to lock in a wild

20:01

card berth for his team. Orders

20:03

Judge intentionally walked and the home

20:05

crowd at Toronto's Rogers Center bowed.

20:08

The next batter grounded out, and then the Blue Jays

20:10

wanted at the bottom of the tenth three to two,

20:12

and Judges still at sixty home runs.

20:15

He has nine games to get sixty one

20:17

or sixty two or more if you are

20:19

wondering when he hit sixty one homers

20:21

in Roger Maris

20:23

of the Yankees was walked intentionally. Well,

20:26

he wasn't, not once all

20:29

year, largely because roughly

20:31

six hundred times that year the

20:33

man batting behind him was

20:35

Mickey Mantle. And I told you

20:37

that Brett Farve has not yet been charged,

20:39

but it may only be a matter of time. And a scandal

20:42

that saw him allegedly siphon off state

20:44

welfare money to build a

20:47

volleyball stadium for his daughter

20:49

at the University of Southern Mississippi.

20:52

Now Sirius XM Radio, which

20:54

not only has a weekly show starring Brett

20:56

Farve but features him in its TV commercials,

20:59

has put his participation in that show

21:01

quote on hold translation,

21:05

He's been suspended indefinitely. Stella

21:21

had. The message was direct. The chairman

21:23

of GE was ready to take MSNBC

21:25

off the air and fire everybody because

21:27

his mommy told him to. It

21:30

actually happened, and I'll tell you about it and things

21:32

I promised not to tell. First, the daily

21:35

roundup of the miscreants, morons and Dunning Kruger

21:37

effect specimens who constitute today's

21:40

wrist persons in the world. The

21:43

Bronze I missed one Sunday. Chuck Todd

21:46

still host of Meet the Press? Is

21:48

he? Is? He still a host of Can

21:50

we check? What's been five

21:53

minutes since we checked? Chuck

21:55

still is okay? Chuck Todd still

21:57

a host of Meet the Press permitted

21:59

Representative Nancy Mace of South Carolina

22:02

to talk about how the Republicans will take

22:04

the House and how they will then impeach

22:07

President Biden. Oddly enough, a

22:09

couple of viewers noticed that Chuck Todd

22:12

never asked a follow up question, like

22:14

just picking one out at random

22:17

for what impeaching for what? You

22:20

might very well think that the Republicans who are

22:22

willing to appear on meet the both sides press

22:24

get a deal that says no follow up questions.

22:27

You might very well think that I

22:29

could not possibly comment silver

22:32

Kevin Roberts, president of the Fascist Heritage

22:34

Foundation, doing a victory dance

22:36

after the Italian election results, quoting

22:39

his tweet, Conservatives will come to

22:41

power in Italy just weeks after Conservatives

22:43

in Sweden. One. This can be a trend.

22:45

Conservatives everywhere need to define the choices.

22:48

What it is us versus them,

22:51

everyday people versus globalist

22:53

elites who have shown they hate

22:55

us unquote. Firstly,

22:57

Mr Roberts, if you're going to say

23:00

quote globalist elites, just

23:03

drop the euphemism, say Jews.

23:06

What's the point of being an anti Semite

23:08

if you use euphemisms.

23:11

But secondly, Kevin Roberts has a bachelor's

23:13

in history from the University of Louisiana at

23:15

Lafayette, got a masters in history

23:17

from Virginia Tech, and a history PhD

23:20

from the University of Texas. And he was a college

23:22

president. So if the fascists divide

23:24

the world into two groups and round up

23:26

all the elites, but let the ordinary

23:29

people go. Mr Roberts, I have bad, breaking

23:31

news for you. You're not getting

23:34

let go. But our

23:36

winner, Senator Roger Marshall

23:38

of Kansas. He is a doctor.

23:41

And George Carlin's line about

23:43

the fact that mathematically it's a proven

23:46

fact that somebody somewhere in the world

23:48

has to be the world's worst doctor.

23:51

This is an actual doctor we're talking about.

23:53

He went to Kansas State then the University

23:55

of Kansas Med School. So this

23:58

is senator doctor

24:00

or doctor Senator Roger Marshall

24:03

on Fox Business Snooze. Flashing

24:06

back to that day, many of us recall

24:08

vaguely of the al Quaeda

24:10

suicide attacks, which as I

24:13

remember it, that was called nine

24:17

eleven. You know, I know that

24:19

you're familiar with nine one. One was in your backyard.

24:21

But one we lost three

24:24

thousand Americans, and certainly

24:26

we hold that day in reverence. But now

24:28

in America we're losing three thousand

24:30

Americans about every two or three

24:32

weeks. And what we did in response

24:35

to nine one one is declare war on terrorism

24:38

and that's what we want to do with the cartail nine

24:41

one one. Sparky,

24:44

this knit wit not only thinks you go

24:46

digit by digit on all dates,

24:49

especially that one, but he's also

24:51

apparently never heard anybody else

24:54

say it allowed, never heard

24:56

anybody say nine eleven,

24:58

never heard it anywhere here in America.

25:03

Well, right, let's be fair. Maybe

25:05

he was just having a bad interview. Maybe

25:07

he was distracted by being on the

25:10

network that stars Maria Barbaromo's

25:12

sibilant s No,

25:15

not really. Here's Mr Senator Dr

25:17

Marshall moments later on News Max. I

25:19

want to take your listeners back to when

25:22

three thousand Americans died and

25:25

we declared war on those terrorists.

25:28

Nine one one. I mean, even for a Republican

25:31

from Kansas, this is idiotic.

25:33

Also, if it's nine one, should the number

25:35

of dead be three O

25:37

O? I mean they let

25:39

this man deliver babies. Okay,

25:43

ma'am, the b abby

25:45

is ready to be birthed.

25:48

Open your mouth wide. Mr

25:51

Senator Dr Roger, Never

25:54

remember nine one one, No way,

25:56

it was never never forget, never

25:59

remember never never something

26:02

one here in a may Ka

26:05

Marshal Today's

26:08

worst person, Hello

26:11

world, to

26:31

the number one story on the countdown on my favorite

26:33

topic me and this is not the

26:35

anniversary of this event, but I was reminded of

26:37

it over the weekend, So here goes. Often

26:40

it happens in television that there are

26:42

events so traumatic that the cliche

26:45

about your life flashing before your eyes

26:47

does not apply, but an equally

26:50

hackneyed one about your career flashing

26:52

before your eyes might. The

26:54

executive producer of our MSNBC

26:57

newscast Countdown, Isy Povich, and

26:59

I were on the grown up elevator to

27:01

the office of NBC President Jeff Zucker

27:04

on the the second floor of thirty Rock

27:06

in New York, Summoned there by some

27:08

garbled message from MSNBC president

27:10

Phil Griffin about MSNBC

27:13

being taken off the air, I

27:16

was mumbling to Izzy, Sundry imprecations

27:18

and reminiscences, eight freaking

27:21

months is we spent twelve freaking

27:23

months forcing them to create meadows showed

27:25

last eight months, all the crap

27:28

prompter practice, getting her over her fears,

27:30

Rockets passed CNN only eight months

27:33

of show, and now it's all gone. Izzy

27:36

reminded me it was not just Rachel's show that was

27:38

threatened, which was why poor Court

27:41

Harson from Hardball was already upstairs,

27:43

along with poor Ed Schultz and

27:46

Phil Griffin at Rachel's executive

27:48

producer Bill Wolf, and some clown from Morning

27:50

Joe, and a couple of other MSNBC executives

27:52

and us. I know, I

27:55

know, I did the line from the drunken

27:57

Irishman from Hitchcock's The Birds, complete

28:00

with the bad accent. It's the end of the

28:02

world, I

28:04

said, f Emil is going to take MSNBC

28:06

off the air. I didn't

28:08

need any of my overwrought visions from two

28:10

years earlier of the future of liberal news

28:13

commentary falling out the NBC

28:15

window to its death on the rink. This

28:17

was the real thing. The chairman

28:19

of General Electric was threatening

28:22

to open the window himself, throw

28:24

us out the window himself, and then

28:26

race down to the pavement to stomp

28:29

on our dying remains himself.

28:32

Poor Ed Schultz heard Jeff Zucker

28:34

say those words, and he had screwed

28:37

up his face and tilted his head like a

28:39

puppy hearing a car crash.

28:41

He had not believed at the first time. He

28:43

had not believed at the second time. Zucker

28:46

said it a third time. Immelt is going to

28:48

take MSNBC off the fffing air at,

28:51

Schultz groaned. After weeks

28:53

of Griffin's coaxing, he had finally just

28:56

moved from Nebraska to New York

28:58

the preceding weekend, yet

29:01

he was still, somehow only the second most strung

29:03

out person in the room. You, Zucker

29:06

shouted at me, You're the smartest one in the

29:08

room. What the f do we do

29:10

now? I'll confess

29:12

I was shaken by this because it appeared for once

29:15

that Zucker was not being sarcastic. I

29:17

had never before seen him flush nor

29:20

flustered. This was a guy who wore fleece

29:22

in July. Now he was

29:25

beat red and sweating. Sometimes

29:27

he knew what he was doing, and, as his opposition

29:30

to hiring Meadow had proved, sometimes

29:32

he didn't know what he was doing. But he always

29:34

acted as the most confident man in

29:36

the galaxy. But now he literally

29:39

had no clue what to do next. And he not

29:41

only could not ignore my advice, he

29:43

desperately needed it. This situation

29:46

and that color on his face were almost

29:48

worth watching the corporate fascists

29:51

knuke my network. I

29:53

asked Zucker to explain what happened? You, God,

29:56

Dad, well know what happened. Zucker

29:58

moved towards me, and I stood up and I told him I

30:00

would see myself out. He stopped,

30:03

remembering that he did indeed, at we need my help.

30:06

I'm sorry, I apologize. This isn't rational,

30:08

this is this is I melt Last

30:11

week sometime Bill O'Reilly snapped. He

30:13

told Murdach he wasn't gonna take any more of what you

30:15

were saying about him on the air. So he did a

30:17

piece last night accusing GE

30:19

of manufacturing the components

30:21

that been used in roadside bombs

30:24

that were built in a rand to kill Americans

30:26

in Iraq, which is which is true

30:28

legally, that's legally true. They found roadside

30:30

bombs that had like thirty year old

30:33

GE transistors or or TV

30:35

tubes from nineteen fifty four or is something

30:37

in them? Legally, g E did

30:39

manufacture components that were used in roadside

30:42

bombs that were built in a rand to kill Americans

30:44

in Iraq. So O'Reilly puts this on

30:46

his fffing show as a lead story, and

30:49

then Fox sent two camera crews

30:51

in this little crap producer from Oriley

30:53

show, Jesse Water Something, to

30:56

stake Immelt out and chase him around

30:58

the GE shareholders meeting in Charlotte.

31:02

Zucker finally came up for air, and I jumped

31:04

in, why didn't m L have six

31:07

camera crews to stake out the two Fox

31:09

crews and chase them around in Charlotte? I mean,

31:11

isn't that one of our news hubs Charlotte

31:14

doesn't m L own like twenty camera crews?

31:16

There? He bring a camera crew, you'll

31:18

bring two camera crews. Zucker

31:21

started to not like me again. Now

31:23

you suggest that where were you in? All right,

31:25

never mind, it doesn't matter. mL

31:27

says. If there's one more story on Bill O'Reilly

31:30

about GE manufacturing components

31:32

for roadside bombs inter rack, he's taking

31:34

MSNBC off the air immediately.

31:37

It'll just be twenty four hours of lock up. And

31:40

I'm fired and you're fired.

31:42

And then he pointed at Chris Matthews, producer and

31:44

Matthews is fired. And he pointed at

31:46

poor Ed Shelts and you're fired, and

31:49

Ed whimpered, So smart, ask what the

31:51

f do we do? I

31:53

feigned all the nonchalance I could feign.

31:56

If I could have lit a shroot by striking

31:58

a match on the soul of my boot,

32:01

I would have. It's

32:03

manageable, But Jeff,

32:05

why is mL so worked

32:07

up about what O'Reilly said about him? Only

32:09

O'Reilly's nutjob viewers actually believe

32:11

any of that crap. Nobody had GE, nobody

32:14

investing in GE could possibly believe

32:17

we're building components for roadside

32:19

bombs. Zucker inhaled

32:22

deeply. M

32:24

L's mother believes it. All

32:27

the heads in the room turned towards the president

32:29

of NBC. Mrs m

32:31

L back in Cincinnati, is a devoted

32:34

Bill O'Reilly viewer watches

32:36

him every night, sees this, calls

32:39

him, says, Sonny, why are you manufacturing

32:41

components that were used in roadside bombs built

32:44

in Iran to kill Americans in Iraq? I

32:48

had not expected that, I

32:50

said to Zooker. So so he'll really

32:53

burn what two hundred

32:55

million a year in profits just

32:57

between Rachel and me? Because he's

32:59

mom watches Bill O'Reilly.

33:02

Zucker got angry again. You bet your being

33:04

assy will now you said it was manageable,

33:07

How how the he do we manage it? Ulverman,

33:10

just a minute? How old is she

33:13

Zooker summoned all his annoyance? How

33:15

old is who m

33:18

ELTs mother? How old

33:20

is she Jeff Zucker was

33:22

really annoyed. How they f should? I know you're

33:24

missing the point. I had

33:27

him really worked up, nearly to the boiling

33:29

point. It was great, guess,

33:32

Zucker spluttered, I don't know. He's

33:34

in his mid fifties. She's got to be eighty

33:37

nineties something. I stifled

33:39

to fake yawn. Yeah, you're

33:41

right, probably closer to ninety now that I think

33:43

of it. So the problem is she

33:46

watches O'Reilly. She tells

33:49

him what's on Fox? What O'Reilly

33:51

saying about Ge? Well,

33:53

I think you have a simple solution. I'd say the first thing

33:55

you do is you send over a couple of big guys to

33:57

her house and you pull the freaking cable

34:00

out of the wall. Zoocker

34:02

actually gasped My producer,

34:04

or is he Povich unsuccessfully stifled a laugh,

34:07

and I saw Rachel crack a smile. Zucker

34:09

regained himself. This isn't funny, Alderman,

34:13

I crossed my legs. Oh, it's a little

34:15

funny. And anyway, it's not

34:17

essential. If the problem is Email

34:19

is threatening to take the network off the air because O'Reilly

34:21

is avenging himself against me by

34:24

attacking him and attacking

34:26

ge. The short term solution is easy,

34:28

and in fact it is manageable. The

34:30

long term solution that's not easy, and

34:33

that's not manageable. But the short term one that's

34:35

simple. Rest of this week, next week,

34:37

maybe the week after that. Even we just

34:39

don't mention Fox News on

34:41

MSNBC. Something

34:44

resembling a smile crossed

34:47

Zuker's face. It made him look a

34:49

little less like a lizard person and

34:51

more like a monkey with glasses. You

34:54

do that forever?

34:57

No, not forever. I would not do

34:59

that, I said to Bias time.

35:02

Yes, but remember who was it who

35:04

was in my office last winter telling me that I

35:06

should go on the air and and just to f

35:08

with Fox? I should ask why Rupert

35:11

Murdoch was still running a huge international

35:13

media company like News Corp, despite

35:15

all the reports that he's suffering

35:17

from dementia, even though there haven't been

35:19

any reports that he's suffering from dementia. For everybody's

35:22

sake, here, who was

35:24

that again who told me to do that? Zucker's

35:27

goodwill was gone? Again? Obviously

35:29

that was me. What's your point? My

35:31

point is, we built

35:34

this new brand of ours organically on a

35:36

couple of themes. A couple of statements

35:38

of principle, and one of them is to use

35:40

your words just to f with

35:42

Fox. If we don't f

35:45

with Fox for a couple of weeks at the start

35:47

of the summer, who's gonna care. Who's gonna

35:49

notice? But like after two

35:51

weeks, three weeks, our viewers are gonna

35:54

notice, and the TV writers are

35:56

gonna notice, and then the crap will hit

35:58

from every direction. You can think of temporary

36:01

freeze on mentioning Fox, then mentioning

36:03

O'Reilly and mentioning Murdoch. Fine, permanent

36:05

freeze. Might as well let him L

36:08

turn us off in the morning. After all, I

36:11

don't think Zucker actually heard the last part

36:13

about m L turning us off. After all,

36:16

the lack of color was returning to his

36:18

face. Okay, breathe, he

36:20

kept saying to himself. Breathe, breathe,

36:23

Okay, breathe. He looked

36:25

at me and nodded. He pointed at Izzy

36:27

and at Phil Griffin and me, you and you and

36:30

you and I will we will talk tomorrow,

36:32

maybe tonight, and we'll all meet again next

36:34

week. Until then, nothing about Fox,

36:37

anybody, are we clear? Nothing on the air

36:39

about Fox. Silence

36:41

in the room, then the assorted noises

36:44

of people rising, mixed with attempts to resuscitate

36:46

poor Ed Schultz. Somebody

36:49

Matthew's guy, Harson I think, was

36:51

almost at the door out of Zooker's

36:53

office, an office so big that it was to steal the

36:55

ring Lardner line, the size of the

36:57

Yale Bowl, but with lamps.

37:00

And then a voice spoke up, quietly

37:02

but firmly. Excuse use

37:04

me. It was Rachel Maddow.

37:07

Excuse me. I will not have

37:09

the content of my show dictated by any

37:12

corporations, including the one

37:14

I work for. Remember this

37:16

is June two nine. She still felt that way

37:18

then, and especially one I don't

37:20

work for. I will walk out first. I cannot

37:23

have the audience wondering what else I have not

37:25

told them. I don't do a lot about Fox

37:27

on my show. But if there is a story about Fox, I

37:29

will not honor this freeze. I will report

37:32

that story. And if I'm prevented from reporting that

37:34

story, I will leave. Whereupon

37:36

she left, Zucker barked

37:39

Phil all Ruman, is he stay? When

37:42

the rest of the room had cleared, Zucker

37:45

blew air out of his mouth as if it were

37:47

smoke. He gestured violently

37:49

at me with his right arm. I told you she was a mistake.

37:52

You didn't listen to me. I told you. Now she's

37:54

your problem. All this is your problem. Get

37:56

her back on the reservation or else. Now

37:59

I had run out of goodwill and jokes.

38:02

Oh, I'll get her back on the reservation

38:04

and Jeff. But if you think this is my problem,

38:07

just think about what happens if he really does

38:09

take us off the air, or if it just gets

38:11

out that he threatened to take

38:13

us off the air because his

38:16

mother didn't like

38:19

what Fox said

38:21

about him. That's my

38:24

problem. Uh, that's your

38:26

problem. And it's the problem of

38:28

the CEO of the freaking sixth

38:30

largest corporation in the world, who

38:33

makes his business decisions involving

38:35

hundreds of millions of dollars of

38:37

profits based on what his

38:39

mother says. At

38:43

this point, Phil Griffin managed to pull Zooker

38:45

away and Izzy and I made for the door,

38:47

saying nothing until we were in the elevator.

38:51

Finally, she asked, what are

38:53

you going to do about Rachel? I

38:55

looked straight ahead. I have depth reception issues

38:57

while traveling forward, backwards, up

38:59

or down the If I know what I'm

39:01

gonna do, about her, but I got an idea. I

39:03

mean, the only person she was really talking to in

39:05

there was herself. This isn't a

39:08

brand new surprise success

39:10

for her anymore. This is successful.

39:12

This is what nine ten months

39:14

she's successful. She said she was

39:16

once a dancing cell phone outside

39:18

of cell phone store outside of Boston.

39:21

She ain't going back to that. I

39:23

went to talk to Rachel about an hour later and reassured

39:26

her. I mentioned that powerful as

39:28

Fox was, they were not going to be able

39:30

to re invade Iraq by themselves,

39:33

and unless she moved it way closer

39:35

than it had been, nobody would cross her censorship

39:37

line. And I said, just give me

39:40

as much time as the French government took

39:42

before fleeing during the Nazi advance

39:44

in n I said, give me, what

39:46

was it, thirty three days? Give me thirty three

39:49

days. If we aren't back where we were this

39:51

morning, we can both quit on the

39:53

air. I mean that would be fun, right.

39:56

Three nights later, well after midnight on a

39:58

Friday, my NBC issued BlackBerry

40:01

buzzed with a quick email from Rachel

40:03

Maddow. Hey, she wrote, don't

40:06

necessarily quote me because I'm really drunk,

40:09

but just make the best deal you can for us.

40:11

I trust you. We don't need to do Fox

40:13

all the time. I never do Fox stories anyway.

40:15

I just had to say that, and this is

40:17

the best platform we will ever have. Well

40:20

she was right, at least for the time being.

40:23

A couple of weeks later, I had to sneak in a script

40:25

that blasted Fox, and at ten thirty at

40:27

home that night, I got a call from a drunken

40:29

Phil Griffin shouting into the phone, I

40:32

have a family. Zucker

40:35

had to go meet with Roger Ales

40:37

secretly inside thirty

40:39

Rock, and I hope they remember

40:41

to clean the room afterwards. And m

40:43

l even had to meet with Murdoch. And

40:46

then, happily, some idiot Ge executive

40:48

decided to boast to the New York Times

40:50

about getting us little talent children

40:52

under control and a big deal with

40:55

the executives over at Fox and how they'd

40:57

settled everything, which blew up the whole deal

40:59

instantly, because the moment the deal

41:02

went public, NBC looked so

41:04

stud oupid, and even NBC News

41:06

was now risked. The

41:09

only point of the whole thing was to keep the Immates

41:11

and the Zookers and the Griffins and the Ales

41:14

is from throwing us and our little island

41:16

of liberal commentary out of

41:18

that window at thirty Rock. But

41:21

as Rachel Maddow and I would be constantly reminded

41:23

in the ensuing years, thirty

41:26

Rock has a lot of freaking

41:28

windows. I've

41:39

done all the damage I can do here. Help me out.

41:41

Give this thing a good review or rating,

41:43

or heart, or a smiley emoji

41:46

or whatever forwarded to somebody. Here

41:49

are the credits. The countdown theme from Beethoven's

41:51

Ninth The Range produced and performed by Countdown

41:53

musical directors Brian Ray and John Philip

41:55

Chanelle. Guitars, bass and drums

41:58

by Brian Ray, All orchestration

42:00

and keyboards by John Philip Chanelle. Produced

42:02

by t k O Brothers. Other baits

42:04

open selections have been arranged and performed

42:06

by No horns allowed our

42:08

sports music. The Alderman ESPN

42:10

two theme was written by Mitch Warren

42:13

Davis and it appears courtesy of ESPN, Inc.

42:15

Musical comments by Nancy Fauss. The

42:17

best baseball stadium organist ever, and

42:20

fittingly our announcer today was Tony Kornheiser.

42:23

Everything else was pretty much my fault. Let's

42:26

countdown for this The six day

42:28

since Donald Trump's first attempted coup against

42:30

the democratically elected government of the United States.

42:33

Arrest him now while we still

42:35

can. A new episode tomorrow.

42:37

Till then on Keith old Reman Good Morning, good afternoon,

42:39

goodnight, and good Luck. Countdown

42:52

with Keith Olderman is a production of

42:54

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42:56

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