0:00

You. Might know Ben make with

0:02

as the host on Turner Classic

0:05

Movies. Now you can hear been

0:07

an intimate conversations with some of

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the most influential filmmakers of our

0:11

time on the new podcast. Talking.

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Pictures from T, C, N

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N Max, our personal, an

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honest conversations with The Guess:

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Nancy Myers, Mel Brooks, Emerald,

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Fennel, and more all join

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bend. Talk about the movies

0:26

that made them. No cameras,

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no fuss, just sitting around

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talking pictures. But talking pictures

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isn't just about movies, it's

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about the powerful role movies

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play in our lives. It's

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about. Where. You were. Who.

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let's begin. Siri,

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2:17

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We

3:11

are

3:16

alive for the first

3:18

part of our

3:20

Valentine's trilogy, 50 Shades

3:23

of Grey, based on the

3:26

best-selling Twilight fanfic.

3:30

This movie is hot, or

3:34

it thinks it's hot. If

3:37

you don't know, if you've not seen the movie, let me

3:39

set it up for you. It involves a

3:42

recent college grad named Anastasia, who

3:44

falls in love with a

3:46

27-year-old billionaire, who

3:49

likes to do weird shit. Is

3:52

he a stalker? Is he a creep? Or

3:54

is he like, yes, is the answer. And

3:58

you're not wrong. People

4:02

in the BDSM community do

4:04

not like this movie! They

4:08

think they got it all wrong. And

4:11

maybe the reason why is because

4:13

the woman who wrote the fanfic

4:15

of Twilight, who was almost sued

4:18

by the producers of Twilight for

4:20

the similarities to the exact movie

4:22

and book, was on

4:24

set to make sure not a

4:27

word deviated from the fanfic. So

4:29

that gives you just a little idea of what we're in store for.

4:32

It's a movie where not much happens, but

4:34

yet it's two hours and eleven minutes.

4:38

Alright ladies and gentlemen, to break down

4:40

this film, I have some amazing co-op

4:42

and I have a very special guest.

4:44

Please welcome to the stage, Mr. Jason

4:46

Mance-Lukas! What's

4:55

up, church? Here

4:58

we go! Here we go, Argo! Holy shit!

5:03

Night one, Fifty Shades of Grey.

5:05

You know, Paul, when you told

5:07

me Fifty Shades of Grey was

5:09

what we were doing, I was

5:11

like, three nights, three movies, great

5:13

idea. Home run. Twenty minutes into

5:15

this movie today, I was

5:17

like, oh no, we're fucked. Oh

5:20

no! Oh no, no, no, no, no, no, no,

5:22

no, no. Oh no. When

5:24

I was zoning out of

5:27

texting, when

5:29

I was like, oh, there's boobs on

5:31

screen, I'll go make more coffee?

5:34

This is... these

5:37

are singular events for me. I've

5:39

never not paid attention to

5:41

tits on screen. Today,

5:43

I was like, I don't know. What?

5:46

It's a movie

5:49

about sex that feels

5:51

the least sexy of anything I've seen.

5:54

Wow! It's sincere,

5:56

it makes me feel awkward. There is

5:58

more sex? Tension

6:00

between Sylvester Stallone and Sandra

6:03

Bullock and Demolition Man. Ebay

6:06

Our father and daughter. Then

6:10

in the movie why is

6:13

straight non so I'm happy

6:15

I'm assume or other. Let

6:17

you thoughts Msm do more

6:19

is absolutely silly. You gotta

6:21

where does it go? I

6:23

will be no, I will

6:26

be dead by Friday. We

6:30

have so much to talk

6:32

about, but. Bring.

6:34

Out. My. Other post we've got to

6:36

visit to move to. Wealth

6:52

I'm good. How are you?

6:54

I'm okay. How are you

6:56

miserable? June. This

6:59

is a good idea. Oh,

7:01

I'm. So scared to say. I

7:03

think I liked to smooth. As

7:12

I'm so happy said that are

7:14

so have you. Didn't say any

7:17

of that back with this. Thread

7:20

Wax Arena to see. What

7:23

to say? I feel so. I suppose. I

7:25

feel like a typical it sounds and I

7:28

see like I'm. Afraid

7:30

now and I'm outta control and

7:32

I'm just press a lot. Of

7:36

the sunni kids. Movies

7:40

I buy it when. oh

7:42

how does this? any other

7:45

computer could Also said. He

7:47

said, here is no woman in her

7:49

twenties is a virgin. Fisher see

7:51

where letter with patterns yes and a.

7:55

Sweater culminated suited to me it was

7:57

wearing it's and the roommate was like

7:59

though during over here is. What

8:03

does it tell me It

8:06

on Hardware store. Every hardware

8:08

store of ever bitten are

8:10

just old men. male. I'll

8:12

happily I was sad thing let

8:14

her work there. Why would you

8:17

not handy at all I need

8:19

for serves her interests in hardware

8:21

in and her knowledge of knobs

8:23

and with some Israel says are

8:25

the is is get a beautifully

8:28

play area who the bird I

8:30

would see takes the real like

8:32

oh no you need this rope

8:34

think we're able to carry more

8:36

weight is known as you know

8:39

mean the one thing as movie

8:41

go wrong. With

8:43

only one. Says that.

8:46

In. The Bdsm community cable ties

8:48

have been put out and

8:50

that's the one thing. Oh

8:52

yeah, why's it? So. Young

8:54

minutes and here's to make the business. If you

8:56

were. Rebirth.

9:00

I do if I. Was

9:04

in a hardware store?

9:06

You absolutely no when

9:08

someone with is ordering

9:10

a beginner creep. You

9:16

told me. This summer Stories

9:18

I was it. Truly you say

9:20

it runs a very filmer treadmill.

9:22

I want to talk to you

9:25

about this movie so much but

9:27

we have introduced to Ethan Spinelli

9:30

mass mass produce are very for

9:32

suggest she not. Just.

9:34

How did this get made us are seeing is.

9:37

Ah, A hot it's get me

9:39

alternate she is one of the family. If

9:41

there was for how did this get made

9:43

people she would be The war there are

9:45

not now. Nor will

9:47

there ever be able to. See

9:53

her whole host. Of the

9:55

deep, die. From

9:59

suicide. Hello!

10:15

From say

10:17

welcome. I want. You

10:20

guys know that I did my

10:22

notes on my phone and it

10:24

started with mass. It was like

10:26

Beebe's math homework so it says.

10:29

Said. He multiplication threes.

10:32

And then it has. He. Notices

10:34

thing. That's

10:37

it also seeing what are

10:39

but plus I would like

10:41

of but next wednesday that

10:43

was on the pacific rim

10:45

where. Are you

10:47

so it has been away for edible I'd

10:49

say as as are those notes or did

10:51

you have like the voice is that it

10:53

had a new. Now

10:56

I want to say something about you know I

10:58

wanna. Say so you an email says sing. And. Bad

11:00

necessity. Or

11:03

one. it's a free

11:05

zone so. Okay,

11:07

submarine only thing anal sustainable.

11:09

Di Maggio for may be done in not.

11:11

When I nodded I knew I feel Hamas

11:14

no problem. Go

11:18

ahead. Really saw it. Neither.

11:21

Are the bucks? I didn't know. Anything about this new

11:23

the Mm. Read the books know I have read about

11:25

I have anywhere I haven't are ya city have any

11:27

of us read the books or her by your send

11:29

them of the book. Was.

11:33

That so much worth reading about

11:35

also to a nursing her back

11:37

soon. As

11:41

only feed some food in a

11:43

porno way. Know,

11:45

I know. I've been at least one from True

11:48

Detective A Season One. Or

11:52

did you do that weird thing where you're

11:54

like in a Barnes and Noble anjelica? were.

11:57

foreigners like flipping through I

12:00

just purchased the book because I like

12:02

literature and I like knowing

12:04

what's going on in pop culture. I had

12:07

the book on my shelf for quite some

12:09

time, the first one. And there was

12:11

a passage I remember that he was describing going down on

12:13

her like eating an oyster. And

12:22

he described it as a salty sweet

12:25

taste and that image of an oyster and

12:28

that. Like, ooh, I don't know if you

12:30

want to put shellfish and oral sex together

12:32

in a pack. I don't think that's

12:34

the best thing. Briny. Well,

12:38

if you're getting a taste of the sea,

12:41

you need to end that date. That

12:43

pH balance is off. You

12:47

are mine. You are

12:49

mine and brined. Ooh,

12:53

crack you open. Listen,

12:56

I haven't read it. I'm going to use a minuet

12:58

sauce before he went down on her in the

13:00

book. I'm so upset.

13:04

This movie. I'm really upset. That's the book

13:06

though. That's not in the movie.

13:08

My notes are, I'm looking at

13:10

them completely insane. I

13:13

did write this. Look, we don't want to

13:15

kink shame. We don't want to yuck anybody's

13:17

yum. Not at all. But this is like

13:19

the same way when I saw Sylvester Stallone

13:21

eat pizza with a fork and knife. We

13:24

have to call out it's weird. I love pizza. That's

13:26

not the way we eat it. Here's the thing.

13:28

I did not. Well, I'm

13:30

going to reveal something. I'm

13:32

so surprised. I found,

13:36

I guess I don't know. I

13:38

thought there was going to be

13:40

more stuff. No,

13:43

I didn't. There

13:45

are two more movies. I

13:48

know there's two more movies, but in this one,

13:50

I was like, I saw that list of things

13:52

he wanted to do. And by the way, anal

13:54

fisting and vaginal fisting, I believe that

13:57

Christian Grey put on that list to

13:59

negotiate with. Right. I feel like

14:01

he's like... It's like when you put stuff in

14:03

a movie that you know the MTA is gonna

14:06

get flagged so you can pull it out. Exactly.

14:08

So you have somewhere to go. Right. He wants

14:10

to negotiate. That's really interesting.

14:12

I had an issue though. How did they read

14:14

that contract? It was so dark in that room.

14:16

It was so dark. Very dark. But

14:18

to me, I was like, all he really seems to

14:20

want to do is tie her hands up and go

14:23

down on her for hours. And that's great.

14:25

And that's great. What's wrong with that? And

14:28

she gets to sleep in her own room. Oh,

14:31

that's a dream. That's a

14:33

dream for both sleep and dreams

14:35

come true. If you would take a big day,

14:38

why can't we go to sleep together? I was like,

14:40

why? Why? Why

14:45

do you need it? But I'll be honest. This guy

14:47

is giving me big Patrick

14:49

Bateman. Yes. This

14:52

guy every... To me, like

14:55

it's as if Dakota Johnson lives in a

14:57

time or I'm so sorry, Anastasia

15:00

Steele. I want

15:02

to be very clear. As Paul said at the

15:04

beginning, this began as Twilight fan fiction. I believe

15:06

I would have preferred it. Shockingly,

15:09

I think I'm going to wind

15:11

up preferring the Twilight movies over

15:13

these movies. Twilight movies are great.

15:15

Yeah, they're great. Regardless. They're

15:17

hot. That's hot. Yes. They

15:19

have chemistry. Fucking you is hot. They

15:21

have chemistry. Stop

15:24

making useless eye contact

15:27

with me. That's what I

15:29

was like when we got married. Screaming

15:31

because they're hot because vampires

15:33

are hot at me. I

15:36

know. I'm agreeing. No

15:38

one could have seen a nice team vampire,

15:40

although some of us are team werewolves. But

15:43

in a world in which Anastasia

15:46

Steele, it's not 2015, it's in fact

15:48

later, would come

15:50

up in the world being obsessed with true

15:52

crime and true crime podcasts and murder podcasts

15:55

and murder worlds. Every red

15:57

flag in the world that God has given her.

16:00

different time william of the day

16:02

and i find it's not any

16:04

more that it when it

16:06

felt like out there i'll try it they

16:09

can't find i can't find a

16:11

picture of him on the internet

16:13

the benefit twenty seven-year-old billionaire the

16:15

four pictures on the internet are

16:17

seems from later in the movie

16:21

there's a lot of them in the

16:23

coffee shop i

16:25

want to get it that people are treated to the fact that

16:27

i had a good idea that they did there's

16:30

another thing that i think you're going to be

16:32

in the hardware store with google

16:34

getting the picture i

16:39

love square space i've built all my website

16:41

on square face because it is the all-in-one

16:44

platform that helps me but i prefer podcast

16:46

it helps grow the brand and what's so

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great about it is you don't have to

16:51

be a designer no no no you can

16:53

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16:55

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have member areas we can basically have a

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can have videos behind their whole

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summer you can maybe decide to share newsletter

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17:13

mean i would like to maybe have a

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a tour update maybe i would just send

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17:20

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19:40

I know, I know. Business.

19:42

Yeah. The media conglomerate. A

19:45

lot of important business

19:48

and telecommunications. They

19:51

definitely said telecommunications. But

19:54

then she was like, but it seems like you have

19:57

like a real sweet side or whatever. You do all

19:59

this. and he's like, not

20:01

really. He's

20:03

trying to be like Bruce Wayne,

20:05

but no Batman? Well, his Batcave

20:07

is very different. I guess that's

20:10

it. He does have fast and

20:12

weapons, just use, not for the

20:14

Joker. I still

20:16

have my question though about his specific

20:18

kinks. He has his kink,

20:20

which is lots of

20:22

slapping, which is fun, you know, that's fine.

20:25

And different textures and feathers.

20:28

Yeah, feathers, I love a

20:30

feather. Feathers, ducking her, he's fucking

20:32

her. I can't figure it out. No problem.

20:34

Dust, play with the feather all night

20:36

long. That's fine. I know,

20:39

but I did feel that there was, he

20:41

makes a big statement of like, I fuck, I don't make

20:43

love. I fuck hard. But then like,

20:46

I never saw you fuck hard. And

20:48

I had the close caption on it.

20:50

You used to fuck so slowly. It

20:52

was, I fuck period, hard. Period. He

20:55

just, the fucking did seem like making love. Am

20:59

I just, well, that's where his internal

21:01

conflict was. I know. But here's, okay,

21:03

but here's my question. She's changing.

21:06

Here's my question. She's changing. Here's my

21:08

question. I

21:12

understand, I think what his kink is in

21:14

the red room, in the playroom. But when

21:17

he takes it a belt and

21:22

quips her. Six

21:24

times. That was tough. Is that sexual

21:27

or is what, where are we? No. That's

21:30

reliving his own trauma. Punishing,

21:32

the punishment, it is like, doesn't she

21:34

say something to the effect of why don't you

21:36

show me the punishment? Yes. Because

21:39

he's saying, I'm not going to do what I

21:41

would do. And she's saying, why don't you show

21:43

me that? Yes. Because that was honestly,

21:45

that's the only problem I had with the

21:47

movie. Right there. That's it. Wait,

21:50

that's it. That's the only problem. Really?

21:53

That's the only thing that I

21:55

couldn't abide by. Wow. And I

21:58

want. But you have to. She

22:01

did ask for it

22:03

enthusiastically. Paul, careful. Mr.

22:05

and Mrs. Smith. Oh

22:08

boy. The

22:11

truth is if Paul had a playroom, first of

22:13

all, my first thought when I saw the movie...

22:16

I will say his organization was... Thank

22:18

you. I knew you were going to

22:20

go into that, Paul. This is the closet of

22:22

Paul's dreams. First of all, the first shot. I

22:25

did. I was like, oh, I

22:27

would love to push it in. But imagine

22:29

you cleaned that apartment. You

22:32

think he's putting all of those elements

22:34

in place? Come on. Well, I

22:36

did think about that. But if

22:38

it was Paul's, it would just be like

22:40

a bunch of different batteries. And

22:42

then it would be different ropes

22:44

for different things, different containers for

22:46

snacks. That's

22:51

what your playroom would be. Well, and everything would

22:53

be labeled. And everything would be labeled. Oh,

22:55

with a... And this is weird. All of a sudden I'm being

22:57

labeled. I also thought it was weird. Sure. I

23:00

get my cable ties. I get some masking

23:02

tape. I go meet young girls at the

23:04

hardware store. It's no big deal. I keep

23:06

an organized pantry. I thought it was strange

23:08

that there was no insert shot

23:10

of a Brother P touch that Christian

23:12

Gray was using to label everything. Typing

23:15

in fuck jeans. Putting

23:18

it on a hand. Flogger.

23:21

That was a terrible moment. That's a flogger.

23:23

I was like, cool. Here's

23:26

what I'll say where,

23:29

just to slightly disagree about the ending, I

23:33

felt like she could take that hit

23:35

because of the way that she fell on her

23:37

face the first time we see her. I'm

23:40

like, this girl's falling all the time.

23:42

The way she falls in that opening

23:44

scene. I don't even

23:46

understand the physics of it. It's

23:48

like a ghost puts her down. I

23:50

would love it if there was a ghost in

23:52

this movie. I think there was one. Please. Please

23:55

let there be a ghost. I did

23:57

rewind that moment, Paul, a few times. because

24:00

I was like, what did you trip over? There's

24:02

no air! There's a marble! There's

24:04

a marble floor! It's a heavy door? Yes. That

24:07

when she hits it, it's as if it's

24:09

nothing. And she's like, I thought it was

24:11

going to be heavy, and then instead like,

24:13

whaa! I thought his hot

24:15

assistant pushed her the last second.

24:19

The offices, everybody's, the way they're dressed,

24:22

the way it's laid out, looks like

24:24

it's from a shitty music video or

24:26

something like that. The entire

24:28

world is foundationally unbelievable.

24:31

So much so that I again deeply

24:34

wish it was just Twilight. I

24:38

wish we understood what his world

24:40

was, what her world was. Immediately

24:43

we never get access to him, and she's like, no,

24:45

I left school, now I live here, but who knows

24:47

what I'm doing. I don't even

24:49

understand where she's moving to or from. I had

24:52

the same issue. She seems to be moving out

24:54

of an apartment to just move to

24:56

another apartment. She's like, is she far away from

24:58

him? Are they together? I never knew when we

25:00

were in Seattle, when we were outside of Seattle.

25:02

I think we're always in Seattle. No, because there

25:05

were times she's like, we're going to Seattle.

25:07

I thought you were there! We

25:09

need to get in a helicopter to go

25:11

there. We gotta get in the chopper to

25:13

go to Seattle. Guys, if I am going

25:16

on a first date with somebody and he's

25:18

just like, surprise, we're getting in a helicopter.

25:20

I'm just like, do you have a license?

25:22

Like, she's just like, yay! A thousand percent.

25:24

And then like, the whole time they're flying.

25:27

He's just staring into her eyes like a psycho. I'm

25:29

like, keep your eyes on the fucking

25:31

side, asshole! Forget that! I don't want

25:33

to go down! And this guy's love

25:36

language is flying. Yeah, why? Whenever he

25:38

makes the mistake, he's like, it's the

25:40

bigger the mistake, the weirder the airplane.

25:42

Here's the deal. He's too young. He's

25:45

too young to be a

25:47

good enough pilot for this

25:49

to work. This is in a way. No,

25:51

I don't want to go zero G with you,

25:53

asshole. I don't know who you are! They're

25:56

multiple. They also are in a glider in this game. What was that? engine

26:00

no I'm really worried that the

26:02

second movie is gonna have a

26:06

hot air balloon

26:13

if it does I'm gonna flip I love

26:16

it I'm

26:19

going in while we're going up here's

26:22

the deal no this even everything we're

26:34

saying none of this is sexy

26:37

no it's not none of

26:39

it is sexy anyway June is not a

26:41

good test on anything I will say June you're right

26:44

it's true you're

26:53

right in the sense that there is unquestionably

26:57

beautiful people photographed beautifully and in a

26:59

way that I was like oh these

27:01

are hot people absolutely there's

27:03

no spark or chemi it's as

27:05

if people were playing with dolls

27:07

I was gonna say yeah if

27:10

they are as hot as mannequins

27:12

and they I am as emotionally

27:14

connected to the mannequins yeah that's

27:16

the that's a body that's

27:18

a body I don't have bodies go together

27:20

like I like there's nothing

27:22

to me about Christian Grey that's

27:25

like whoa he's

27:27

like he has Patrick Bateman energy

27:29

it's like that opening scene is

27:31

like that scene where boom

27:33

the foe is interviewing Patrick Bateman in American

27:35

Psycho we're trying to find out if he

27:38

killed him I mean that's as much chemistry

27:40

as you're getting like he's not smooth he's

27:42

not charmin less charisma than Patrick

27:44

he's got no Riz he's got no

27:46

Riz got zero Riz

27:49

okay define Riz you've

27:55

got that Riz baby Try

28:00

again. You can't use the word we

28:02

want you to define. Try again. That's

28:06

some hot rizz, baby. Put that rizz on me,

28:08

baby. Who has

28:10

rizz? Who has rizz? I

28:13

want you to rizz all over my face,

28:15

baby. Do

28:18

you think rizz is related to jizz? Jess,

28:22

who has rizz? Who

28:24

has rizz? Don't say rizz, I'm editing. Who

28:28

has rizz? None of those people in that movie

28:30

have rizz. I'll tell

28:32

you who has rizz. Who? Dakota

28:35

Johnson's stepdad after

28:37

that gazpacho rant. I was like, all right, I

28:39

like this guy. I like this guy. I like

28:42

his energy. He's the only person that gave me

28:44

any bit of life. He's like, he's doing bits.

28:46

He's like, hey, man, I want to gazpacho with

28:48

like, you know, all the other stuff. I'm

28:50

like, oh, thank God, a human being. Yes,

28:53

someone. Her biological dad, too,

28:55

I like. She shows up at her graduation and

28:57

walks in with the students. Hey, kid, what do

28:59

you need? Bop, bop, bop. Lovely, lovely

29:01

man. Why are these people having such a

29:03

hard time getting to her graduation? It seems like a big

29:05

deal. Yes, the mom doesn't go because the dad broke his step

29:07

foot. The step, the

29:09

fourth step. Golfing. And

29:12

then the other guy is like so late that he's like

29:14

popping in. It looks like

29:17

he was in the procession with students. She's

29:19

like, oh, I saved you a seat. How? It's

29:23

so hard, though. There are certain things in

29:25

these movies, these big budget movies, where it's

29:27

like, it's so weird. The

29:29

excuses are so weird and the exposition

29:31

is so damn odd that I'm forced

29:34

to believe it. I'm like, I guess.

29:36

It has to be true. It has

29:38

to be true because it is so

29:41

wild that the stepdad can't come because

29:43

of a broken toe. That the mom wouldn't. I'm

29:45

sorry, that the mom can't be home. But that's

29:47

the whole thing. That's why she puts herself in

29:50

this. I feel when I'm speaking

29:52

about this movie in a normal way that

29:54

I'm like, I wrote this for my

29:56

senior women's studies thesis. Yeah, I know.

29:58

I know. It's the

30:01

women's territory. But this is why

30:03

she's in these relationships. She's

30:07

not being put first by anybody

30:09

and then Christian puts her first. What?

30:13

Can we agree that she was kidnapped? What do you

30:15

mean? Oh yeah, for sure. Out of

30:17

the bar, she pukes, and he's like, you're coming

30:19

with me. And then she's like, help

30:22

hostage in a room. I'm so sorry,

30:24

but also... And dressed up like this. Why is he

30:26

there? It's inappropriate. She calls

30:28

him to tell him off. He

30:30

shows up and abducts her. Yeah,

30:33

he tracks her. She's in a

30:35

blackout, wakes up in a... The

30:37

meat puke. It's

30:41

the best joke of the night right there. Holy

30:45

shit. But I mean, his arrival

30:47

as if this is like he's

30:49

a night

30:52

in shining armor who's coming to rescue

30:54

her from being drunk? From

30:57

Jose? Get the fuck out of here. Poor Jose. This

31:00

is a villain. Christian Grey is a

31:02

villain. Wow, wow,

31:04

wow. This is her fault. And

31:08

Taylor is his hatchet man. Taylor's doing some

31:10

shit. He's doing some

31:13

shadow work. Oh, big time.

31:17

What happened to those other 15 girls that

31:19

shared the Red Room or whatever? He's an existing

31:21

mercenary. There are

31:23

moments in this movie where they

31:27

land as comedy, but you know they're not

31:29

supposed to be. And I

31:32

laughed so hard when Dakota Johnson is in

31:34

that room and she says, how many women

31:36

have been in this room? How many women

31:39

have been in this room? Okay,

31:43

June, June, can we take it again? But

31:45

just less. And

31:48

then end with this. Okay. How

31:50

many women are in this room? And

31:52

he says so quickly, he

31:55

says 15. Yeah. I

31:57

cried laughing. So

32:00

it's like another moment I don't think

32:02

was supposed to be funny, but I laughed

32:04

was when he does start to open up

32:06

about his past trauma and what happened to

32:08

him and he's four and she looks over

32:11

and she's asleep. She

32:16

is sleepy, Tackney. Oh my

32:18

god. Sleepy, sleepy, sleepy. When she revealed

32:20

that she was a virgin, I laughed

32:22

so hard. I

32:26

was like, absolutely not. There's

32:29

no way, shape or form. It's so funny

32:31

though. It's not even being played that way.

32:33

I know and here's again my only

32:36

other critique. The only other is

32:38

like we actually we didn't need her to be

32:40

a virgin and that's where

32:43

I just felt

32:45

like E.L. like let her she can

32:47

still have a sexual past and be opened

32:49

up to whole new. It's strange

32:51

because she's older than Bella from

32:54

Twilight? Right, Bella's in

32:56

high school. Bella being

32:58

a virgin seems like okay she's

33:00

young like that to then map

33:02

this onto then I'm like well

33:04

what world is this and what

33:06

world are we in and I

33:09

don't understand it and I feel uncomfortable.

33:11

Yeah, well because it's not that she

33:13

didn't sign any of that damn thing.

33:16

I did not consent to

33:18

the movie happening to me.

33:21

By the way, when she

33:23

signs that NDA in the beginning, he's like here's

33:25

an NDA. Love it. No

33:30

red flag there. That's

33:32

what she says. Are you gonna make love to me

33:34

now? This is a virgin.

33:36

By the way, are you gonna make love to me

33:39

now? She just worked an eight hour shift at the

33:41

hardware store. Got in

33:43

a helicopter. Blew for about another

33:45

40 minutes. Like let her take

33:47

a shower. She's like why don't you show

33:50

me your ball peen hammer? That's

33:52

a great joke. No, if you have

33:54

to explain it. It's a

33:56

great joke. By the way, I

33:58

will say that. She

34:01

reacts to sex

34:04

and things of sex in 2015, like

34:06

so scared. Like

34:08

when she looks at like what bondage is

34:10

to go, closes that laptop so

34:12

quickly. And I was like wow that's freaking you.

34:15

They were very tame images too. Also

34:18

her question was what is a butt

34:20

plug? She had time. She's taken four

34:22

weeks to look at that contract. She had time to Google

34:24

that. You're also like 20

34:26

something in 2015. You

34:29

know what a butt plug is. You don't know what a

34:31

butt plug is. You never heard butt plugs. The question is

34:33

why does he have to pick the pharmacist? He

34:35

doesn't have to pick the pharmacist, babe. He has to pick

34:37

the doctor. That's fucking creepy. I thought he had

34:39

to. That is so creepy. Oh

34:42

yeah. Now

34:44

I do that for June because I

34:46

just don't trust any man around her.

34:49

I mean she says to

34:51

him on their first meeting, so you're a

34:53

control, sorry. So you're a control freak. And

34:57

he says oh I exercise control

34:59

in all things Miss Steele. Fuck

35:03

you movie. Fuck

35:05

this is like porn character names

35:08

in a movie. Like

35:10

Cinemax movies are more sexual.

35:12

More satisfyingly. Red

35:14

Shoe Diaries gets it right. Phil Stockings

35:16

is better than this shit. Yes, where's

35:19

the company? Um

35:21

here's another red flag.

35:24

Here's the biggest red flag. If

35:26

you were on a date with somebody and they're

35:29

like want to see me play my grand piano,

35:32

that means you are about to get killed

35:35

or whipped with a peacock feather. Or

35:37

you're dating Billy Joel. That's

35:39

right. And that's a good scenario. But

35:44

where have you ever been like oh that's so sexy

35:46

that man's playing that grand piano. Now we've seen it

35:48

in Pretty Woman. I'm so sorry Tricky Peekin. You

35:50

don't listen to her. I

35:53

cheat you. It's

35:55

true. It's like not a guitar.

35:58

It's not the sexiest instrument. I

36:00

don't want listen. I don't want any man to play

36:02

music to me Play

36:07

that song son you're Cassio right

36:09

born if it's Gonna

36:11

be an instrument. Well. I would take

36:14

a guitar right cuz I was looking at him I'm like I don't

36:16

even think his style of dress is cool Like when they go out

36:18

to walk in the woods like I

36:20

don't like the way you that's banana Republic

36:22

Yeah, Mad Men collection from

36:24

1990 He's

36:27

not dressed like he's on succession.

36:29

Yeah Well,

36:31

he's a billionaire he's the youngest billionaire.

36:33

What was the headline? I can't remember

36:35

youngest billionaire in business She

36:41

majored in English lit and minored

36:43

in lip biting I

36:46

like when he becomes a sex terminator is

36:48

like your legs moving that means that you're

36:50

wet your eyes are going like this That

36:52

means that you've never been fucked at night.

36:54

Your ears are just I'm like How do

36:56

you know all of this Sherlock? Yeah, he's

36:59

like I he goes into his memory palace

37:01

and understands Fucking everything that's happening

37:03

by the way give me that version

37:05

of it, but he is done Hey

37:10

everybody just wanted to give you a

37:12

quick heads up here. There's something we

37:14

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37:16

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37:26

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37:29

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37:31

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39:08

terms of duty. How did he find her

39:10

at the bar? He tracked her phone? Who

39:13

knows? But that's like the thing we're led

39:15

to believe. Taylor. Taylor's probably following Taylor.

39:17

I also think it's some of

39:20

the telecommunications he's up

39:22

to. Tracker. Tracker phone. I will say that

39:24

this is a funny thing that I noticed

39:26

and was confirmed for me today that

39:29

when she hangs up there's a dial tone but

39:31

that's on cell phone. Nobody

39:36

caught it. Nobody

39:40

caught it. What about that weird dance she

39:42

does when they're in the middle of that

39:44

like Frank Sinatra moment? That's the other thing

39:46

I can't I can't go back and forth

39:48

between romance and then all that crazy.

39:50

I also can't here's another hallmark. I

39:52

realize there's another hallmark of a bad

39:54

movie of one of our bad movies

39:56

wherein all the needle drop songs inside

39:58

of it the. Frank Sinatra song accepted

40:01

are covers, are bad covers

40:04

of a song that they want to

40:06

use but are not. And I was

40:08

like, this movie is just drowning in

40:10

shitty covers of songs in a way

40:12

that are like... But low

40:14

covers too. Like they're not yet, they're

40:17

like... Plotting. Let's make that real slow.

40:19

Like now it's sexy. This movie is

40:21

trying so hard to be sexy. This

40:24

movie is Anastasia Steele, right?

40:26

It is like, that's

40:29

sexy. I'm a virgin. I

40:31

know what sexy sex is. That's

40:34

what it feels like. So if you're at

40:37

home, just pull that quote from Paul and

40:40

put a song in there. Make it a

40:42

second opinion. But I mean, don't you feel like that? Like,

40:45

cause I guess the whole thing is... I

40:48

don't even remember there, as Paul knows, there's a

40:50

lot of like cultural moments that I just dip

40:52

out of. Like I'm not a part of. And

40:55

this is one of them. Like I don't

40:57

remember. I have a vague recollection of one

40:59

of my sisters who I never saw read

41:01

a book and had no interest in books

41:04

or literature. Just like sitting

41:07

with 50 Shades of Grey. And

41:17

I was like, why is she

41:20

reading a book? Like it

41:22

was so crazy. Well

41:24

it was also such a cultural,

41:27

cultural like movement. This

41:29

book was massive.

41:31

These books. Yeah. And

41:34

so I guess they were just porn

41:37

for women. And

41:39

that's great. And that's wonderful. You know,

41:42

and listen, that's why I struggled with

41:44

the last scene because I love

41:47

that for women and I love that this

41:49

movie does that for... That's all wonderful. But

41:51

I just... The last scene when she's just

41:53

simply being abused is tough. It's a

41:55

tough one to swallow. It's tough to swallow. But

42:00

this movie also is doing something really interesting

42:02

because the movie really Like

42:05

if you were to arc it out if you're like,

42:07

what is this movie? Like what are the acts of

42:09

this movie? It's like there's nothing there. It's like they

42:12

meet he's like, hey, I'd like you to sign this

42:14

contract so I can beat you up And

42:16

she's like, I'll think about it She

42:19

never does he's like, well, I'll give you a sample

42:21

and she's like I'm out and that was it. That's

42:23

the movie Well, like it's like I think

42:25

so. I don't know cuz we haven't seen I guess

42:27

I'll find out tomorrow night Does

42:30

she ever say yellow does she ever

42:32

say red on the contract? But

42:34

she's gonna sign it right for sure. She

42:36

walked out. She's definitely So

42:41

many people at home so many listeners we've

42:43

read the books or watch these movies No

42:49

one wrecked this no one wrecked this because I think

42:51

in the second movie She

42:54

becomes the dominant and he

42:56

becomes the missive because that's not getting in

42:58

my head. I'm like Reigniting

43:11

that woman who raped him by the way, this

43:14

is the movie about a man who's been raped

43:16

and it's taking it He can't have normal sexual

43:18

relations. That's also underneath Right. I mean we can

43:20

all agree. Oh, no, and again, we don't need

43:22

that EL. We don't need that part So

43:25

we're talking about a May December storyline underneath

43:27

this movie. I'm like, wow. All right, cool

43:29

We just drop that in there. She was

43:31

older than me. Don't worry about it. I'm

43:33

fine He has more

43:36

chemistry with Marcia Gay Harden

43:39

Who plays in the doctor mother? Then

43:42

he does with Dakota Johnson Also

43:46

Yeah, when they do finally have

43:48

sex it is like

43:51

just and again She has been revealed to

43:53

be a virgin. He is just ramming

43:56

it in Straight away and

43:58

it is like the. Fantasy elements

44:00

of it. I was like. The. I

44:02

don't get such as he just

44:04

couldn't I couldn't There was no.

44:08

Infamous the scenes and I guess that's represented

44:10

on his part know antipathy inside of this.

44:13

but for her I was like. In

44:15

that way that she was like then alone As

44:17

a quip is no coddling the Xo bullets and. Now

44:19

season as not but the his he

44:21

gets the sleep alone in a bad

44:23

side of sorry that sounds. Great. Hi

44:26

I'm Eric. A

44:29

success. Have a whole bed,

44:31

see yourself away. A ball. Know

44:35

what we're seeing person Gray at

44:37

the most Intimate. He's. A I've

44:39

never. Slept. In a

44:41

bed with a woman? But that

44:43

does it over and over. Donald

44:45

Another slice. Don't you only making

44:48

his own rules? Because she's actually.

44:50

Sit. Down and Is and Me is

44:52

societies that are saying you that I

44:54

won the day. And. He's like well

44:56

i'll give you a date is a realist

44:58

Instead I mind trick them say oh. I

45:01

see linked lists and I do think

45:03

that that is of reading of the

45:05

movie that's absolutely available. A sees really

45:07

The damn. He's really the submissive. Of

45:10

I just think it's falls apart at the very. End.

45:12

Fortunately, With this. Like

45:14

The Hobbit. Mass.

45:18

I don't. Sway

45:21

know Armitage saw in

45:23

a high frame rates.

45:27

They knew they were done. is she did. They showed

45:29

all three at one not at once but is

45:31

the I do think the is I do think

45:33

there was some years be knew that they heard

45:35

you own of the books were coming out right?

45:38

Yes the books are coming up a new that

45:40

they were. We were signed on for three. Now

45:42

the big story was at Charlie Hum. We're.

45:44

Supposed to be Christian Grey and

45:46

then are like dropped out like

45:48

it's seemingly. right? Like I've

45:50

been like buffy might have you been to they

45:53

shoot some. I think he was on the plane

45:55

going to Vancouver. Okay those they don't see some

45:57

Id and than any other thing I believe in

45:59

transition. From his Sons of Anarchy character into this

46:01

very. Very sad

46:04

mm I think there is there is

46:06

also and somebody I'm sure it will

46:08

correct me if I'm wrong. Ah,

46:10

Dakota Johnson and Jamie Dornan

46:12

is despise each other. Oh.

46:14

Really? I mean, that's been debunked.

46:16

Oh without, right? Okay, The great.

46:19

I don't know. Okay. I

46:26

mean a truly men and eye

46:28

not trafficking in the gossip of

46:30

the moment. Another more it seems

46:32

that. That. Was just as.

46:34

Some sort of fabrication.abilities or are very

46:36

very close the day will I on

46:38

agence like settlers Also thinking about to

46:41

this is a movies. That. To.

46:43

Me is the kind of a

46:45

nightmare because it's like they are

46:47

flocking so much. That. It's like.

46:50

whom. That I don't syntax and.

46:52

Waiting to happen is it just feels.

46:54

Like apparently they put hidden cameras around all

46:57

the rooms so he could have like more

46:59

privacy. A rather names I think that that

47:01

seems amazing is it as the weekends no

47:03

effort and they also did city I pubic

47:06

hair aware of what. Why did they

47:08

put his views post? Is has

47:10

so our farms litter of

47:12

Cdr budget. really not a

47:14

certain set of American on

47:16

the day but why. Is

47:19

that was as a result I. Honestly

47:21

under threat. Or is this or

47:24

that for God's The guide is no doubt. no

47:26

tissue or first move where it is such. A

47:32

reason why we. Are

47:34

you originally each of their private

47:36

talks? With a

47:38

voice is it says. It

47:42

sucks because there's so many

47:44

sites. Where you can't see her periods

47:46

and it just looks like there is a

47:48

ball. Diesel engines? God bless America. But then.

47:52

Or national for. Us.

47:55

But said all of a sudden they are

47:57

there in one miles north of say. As

48:00

a guy who's that organized and that neat, I

48:02

don't think he'd be Rod Dogg in his pants

48:04

like that. I think he'd be wearing some underwear.

48:06

He feels, to me, like a guy who's like,

48:08

I only wear underwear once. Yeah! Like, he doesn't

48:10

feel like a guy who puts on, like, slacks

48:13

over dick and balls. Yeah, that's...

48:16

I understand that. That seems patently

48:18

insane. Also, isn't it funny

48:20

to think we live in a world right

48:22

now where there are multiple think pieces constantly

48:24

being put out there about how young people

48:26

think sex scenes shouldn't be in movies? What?

48:29

Really? That don't want sex scenes to be...

48:31

I read all of Jason's blog posts. Have

48:33

you read them? They're great think

48:35

pieces. There is a whole movie scene amongst

48:37

young people that sex scenes shouldn't be a

48:39

part of movies. They are not appropriate to

48:41

be in movies, etc., etc., etc., and

48:43

only nine years ago, this was...

48:46

it was nothing but sex nonsense

48:48

from top to bottom. Wow,

48:50

what's their problem with them? Um... Young

48:54

people? You tell me. Let's

48:56

go out to the audience. Let's find out from the young people. And

49:00

by young, we mean 35. 35 is what we're

49:02

looking for. All

49:05

right, your name and your question. Hi,

49:07

Danielle. And my question is,

49:10

why is his obsession with him having

49:12

sex and genes and just genes, right?

49:14

In, like, one scene, he's, like, in

49:17

a full suit. They're having, like, a

49:19

sexy combo. And then it

49:21

cuts. And he's, like, just in genes? Can

49:23

I ask, is there a fuck

49:25

gene? Like, he gets his, like... Yeah. Is that

49:27

part of the books? Is that, like,

49:29

a... It is. Is that this... Okay,

49:33

no, don't be... No, this is a safe space. If

49:35

you have expertise... Can you explain the fuck gene to us at

49:37

all? It's like

49:39

his costume for the Red Room.

49:41

Okay. Oh! Like,

49:44

it's... Thank you, thank you. This is the Lord's

49:47

work right here. We need this. You

49:49

help us. This is a best thing. Paul, can I ask...

49:51

She read the book today. Can I ask her a question?

49:53

Yeah, the whole book today. Hey, can I ask her a

49:55

question? What's your name?

49:57

Raya. Raya. Why is it called...

50:00

the Red Room in the books and the play room

50:02

in the movie. So that's

50:05

Anastasia's view of it, the Red Room of

50:07

Pain and his

50:09

playroom. Thank you. Thank

50:11

you. Wow okay. Remember when she does...

50:13

We're gonna come back to you because it's fresh in your

50:16

head if we have other questions. I was gonna say is

50:18

there anything else that we've been wondering about tonight or asked

50:20

about that you have answers to that you want to share

50:22

and no pressure if not? That's

50:25

fine. You read it too? Oh no no no. Somebody

50:29

had a detailed call over here. You have a

50:31

question? Okay we have this is the first. An

50:33

audience member has a question for

50:37

the person who read... This

50:39

is an audience member to

50:42

audience member question? Are

50:44

we allowed to read in or should

50:46

we leave the stage? Okay all

50:49

right your name? Rochelle.

50:51

And Rochelle what is your question for

50:53

our other audience member? Are

50:55

they correct about the CGI pubes? Well

50:58

she wouldn't know that from reading the book. She

51:01

didn't say she worked on the set. Do you

51:03

think that I'm correct? I

51:06

know it's right. Ask me yes. You

51:09

blew it Rochelle you blew it. All

51:11

right going back to the guys now.

51:13

In reading the book. I think the

51:16

question for Raya was is there explicit

51:18

mention of her pubes in the book?

51:21

Are they a character? Sorry to ask you this.

51:24

And are they in the book referred

51:26

to as computer generated? You

51:30

are saying an emphatic yes about the

51:33

pubes. Like what do you like why

51:35

emphatically? Every time it

51:37

is mentioned when he travels down there

51:39

it is a journey through the pubic

51:41

air. Wow

51:44

the hunt for pubes

51:46

calling the journey through

51:48

the pubes. This

51:51

is this is some

51:53

real nonsense. If

51:55

you have to fight your way through

51:57

a thicket like three big motherfucking

51:59

beauties. It is time you walk! That

52:03

is in the house! That's why it's in the

52:05

hardware store, trying to get a weed whacker or something like that.

52:08

You shouldn't have to journey through those

52:10

pews ever. Alright,

52:12

your name. Hi, Simone. So

52:15

I think it's kind of one

52:18

of the worst cast movies of all

52:20

time, is universally recognized. Do

52:22

you have alternate suggestions for casting?

52:25

Ooh, great question, great question.

52:28

I mean, when it was filmed, I was probably 34,

52:30

so... And

52:32

I must have been 27. I could

52:35

have been playing 27 at that age, so

52:37

I don't know if it was available. Yes,

52:40

it's tough to be period-specific to 2015. It

52:44

could be from now we're told. Can it be? No!

52:56

Who's the Dom now? Who's the

52:58

sub, baby? She's

53:01

got ribs! Again,

53:03

I'm certain you don't know how to

53:06

use that word. She's got got ribs,

53:08

baby! I'll

53:11

think about it. Yeah, I mean, this is a good

53:13

question because it's like, you know, there's a part of

53:15

me that goes, you know, maybe

53:17

I could see... Well, it's like,

53:19

what do you want from Christian Grey? You want

53:21

like the sexy, confident guy...

53:24

Listen, I haven't read the book, so

53:26

I don't know, but for me, their

53:29

blankness... Worked.

53:33

Like, I didn't need more from them

53:35

than for them to be sub. Boy,

53:37

did I. I wouldn't... Yeah, I mean, that's

53:39

just like... So much more from both of

53:41

them. June, are you saying

53:44

that you like the traditional man-woman movie

53:46

like this? Boo!

53:50

Yes, yes. I also like

53:52

a man-woman movie. That's a reference to another

53:54

episode of How to the Skimmaid, yes. Did

53:58

you have a question? Okay. As an

54:00

um can we talk about her friend for a second?

54:05

valedictorian How

54:08

did you by the way how did she

54:10

become valedictorian when Dakota Johnson is out there

54:12

doing her work for her? How

54:15

did she become a valedictorian when one

54:17

of her questions are are

54:19

you gay? Just

54:23

Yeah, yep, real clever Graduating

54:25

with honors in that regard.

54:27

I love that Dakota Johnson approached that interview. She's

54:30

like I just gotta read it It's here on

54:32

this sheet of paper It's like she was being

54:34

like she was a wrong burgundy and anchorman if

54:36

it's in front of me I'm gonna say it.

54:39

I love Kate. I was upset that we didn't get

54:41

more of Kate I feel like Kate had some life

54:43

force and I think this is the problem with a

54:45

movie like this We had a brother were the most

54:47

interesting most compelling. Yes Yeah,

54:51

but Kate was a really bad friend she

54:55

Anybody could have seen she's getting it. You

54:57

know over her head all of the

55:00

press. Yeah I also here's another thing that was

55:02

different in 2015

55:04

no one was blinking and either like it's hot

55:06

to have a guy buy you a car You

55:08

know, it's hot to like you don't

55:10

have a laptop. I thought it should have been

55:12

a nicer car I didn't

55:15

like that car. I like it. Look like he got

55:17

her a minivan I thought I like any van because

55:19

I have children And

55:22

I would have taken that car and

55:24

really packed full of camping gears bike

55:26

whatever Yeah, I just

55:28

um You

55:31

know, I think

55:33

this thing with Kate is and

55:35

honestly with anesthesia too is it's

55:38

listen No

55:40

kink shaming. I would never shame you

55:42

think at all But they

55:45

go down a lot easier when the person with

55:47

a kink is so rich

55:52

That That it's like it's like

55:55

Morally reprehensible. That's how rich they

55:57

are and and that's That's

56:00

where I think we're able

56:02

to overlook a few things. Wait,

56:05

what? I can't tell what you're

56:07

saying. What

56:09

I'm saying is I

56:11

don't think that this scenario would

56:14

have taken place if Christian Gray

56:16

was in a studio apartment. Okay, so

56:18

what you're saying is that it's just... It

56:21

would be hard if you'd have to do

56:23

a divine spell. It would be hard if

56:25

there's not another door. You and Diane Rayfield

56:27

for Sugar Daddies is what you are pitching

56:29

out. She's crazy. I

56:32

wrote this in my thing that is like

56:34

in a post-dobs world, how insane is it

56:36

to watch a woman sign away her rights

56:39

to a rich white billionaire? Yeah, it's weird.

56:42

I was like, this is chilling. Yeah, it was.

56:45

This is billing. It was like a time capsule to a very

56:47

bad time. I was like, ooh, I don't like this. He

56:50

is not trustworthy. I

56:52

don't like that she's so easily giving

56:54

away everything. The NDA signing immediately. I

56:56

was like, gulp, ooh, boy. I

56:59

did also think that the way that the

57:01

dad reacted to her dating him

57:03

was odd. I

57:06

thought it was odd for him to pose

57:08

with her in a picture after complaining so

57:10

much that he didn't want a girlfriend. He's

57:13

giving a lot of submissive messages.

57:16

Also, very mixed messages. Yeah,

57:18

mixed messages. Because he's like, no

57:20

dates, no nothing, no movies, no nothing. And

57:22

then immediately he's like, what about one day a week a

57:25

date? Can you imagine

57:27

going bowling with Christian Grey?

57:30

Listen, I hear anything. That

57:32

was his other option. Here's the thing, and

57:34

I know very little about the community, but

57:36

here's the thing. I'll still speak on it.

57:38

Of course. Can you just

57:40

clarify what community? I'm

57:43

just saying in terms of submissive and domed, and

57:45

you said this before, Paul, I do think that

57:48

he spent so long as a submissive that that

57:50

is what he is playing out with her. That

57:53

he is falling back into that. That's what

57:55

I think, yeah. But why do

57:57

I wish this had werewolves and vampires?

58:00

So do I wish some part of this

58:02

was about werewolves and... Listen, where do you

58:04

love the last scene when she goes, stop!

58:06

And he stares and she goes, you know,

58:09

she's just Anastasia. Christian. Then

58:11

you cut back to him and do the Michael Jackson eyes from Thriller like... You

58:16

be continued. I

58:24

will say there's... The

58:27

movie takes place in the Pacific Northwest and

58:30

home of vampires. Not really. Paul does.

58:32

It gave me female ancestors later. Home

58:34

of vampires. Serial killers. Home

58:37

of vampires. Well, the

58:40

Pacific Northwest is where Twilight is set. Yeah.

58:43

Because of how dark it is there. An overcast. Yes!

58:46

Their skin is translucent. That's where they are. They can't

58:48

handle the sun. That's why the Cullens live

58:50

there, Paul. Paul. Duh! That's

58:53

why the Cullens live there. Sorry, I... You

58:55

guys were reading Twilight. Hello. I

58:57

was reading my Tess de Arboville first

59:00

edition, which looked like some weird

59:02

thing that I might get like at a Crate and Barrel.

59:06

But serial killers also live

59:08

in the Pacific Northwest. Everyone

59:10

knows that. Bigfoot

59:13

and Bigfoot. And

59:17

I was like, oh, I bet there is

59:19

a lot of weird sexual stuff. What's

59:23

going on? Oh, yeah. Oh,

59:25

yeah. Well, it's raining all the time. You have to

59:27

be inside. They never see the sun. They never see

59:29

the sun. They gotta come up with things. They gotta

59:31

do something. Obviously, we had opinions about this movie,

59:34

but there are people out there with a different opinion

59:36

and it is now time for Second Opinion. Hey,

59:41

my name is Doug. She

59:44

tripped into his office. Why, I do

59:46

not know. She

59:49

sells him cable ties, masking

59:51

tape and rope. Gives

59:53

her an NDA, but lets her

59:55

take it home. These are Fifty

59:58

Shades Second Opinion. Just give her

1:00:00

a spank, Hank. Bind

1:00:03

her with a tie, guy. Swat

1:00:06

her with a switch, Mitch. And

1:00:08

give it five stars. Bring

1:00:10

her up in the tub, Doug. Tell

1:00:13

me what the butt plug. Put the

1:00:15

bite on this, just. And

1:00:17

give it five stars. Thank you.

1:00:22

That was amazing. Give it up for Jeff. A

1:00:24

man. Great job. We're Jeff. Great

1:00:28

job, Jeff. Killing it. Wow.

1:00:32

That's the way you do it. Take a

1:00:34

lesson from Jeff. Great, great job. Okay. Well,

1:00:37

obviously you know that there are a

1:00:39

lot of five star reviews on Amazon

1:00:42

about this movie. As a matter of

1:00:44

fact, there are 72,000 reviews of this

1:00:46

movie. Reviews

1:00:52

or five star reviews? No, there are

1:00:54

72,000 total reviews and 77% of them

1:00:56

are five stars. Wait,

1:01:02

are we on the wrong side? And

1:01:06

I will just tell you what I have to say here. Nikki,

1:01:09

titles of review, I have to say I definitely

1:01:12

like the movie more. As

1:01:15

someone who has read the book and now has

1:01:17

seen the movie, I have to say I definitely

1:01:19

like the movie more. I found

1:01:21

it to be way more romantic than the book. They

1:01:24

did a great job in making it to where the people would

1:01:26

enjoy it. The music in the

1:01:28

movie was incredible and the sex scenes were

1:01:31

done quite tactfully. As

1:01:33

long as you can understand that this isn't what true love is supposed

1:01:35

to be about. I think it

1:01:37

would be just fine for a mature 16 year old

1:01:39

to be able to watch with

1:01:42

parental supervision. I don't know about

1:01:44

that. I'm sorry. Just

1:01:46

a quick question. Can I go on Amazon

1:01:48

and tell people what age people should be

1:01:50

to watch certain movies? Well, this is baby.

1:01:53

This is what's happening here. Nikki

1:01:55

continues, I watched this film with my own

1:01:57

mother. What? Which

1:02:01

was great because they got to talk about

1:02:03

what was going on. Great

1:02:06

movie and I highly recommend it.

1:02:10

I had to explain anal fisting to my

1:02:13

mom. Now

1:02:15

Jay chimes in and writes, this

1:02:17

movie was very hot and steamy.

1:02:20

I am very happy with the purchase of this

1:02:22

movie. It was definitely worth the buy. It

1:02:24

made me all tingly inside. The

1:02:27

actors were quality actors. Anna

1:02:30

was a little annoying but I

1:02:33

would buy the movie again. I mean I would recommend

1:02:35

buying this movie for a little bit of romance in your

1:02:37

life. The movie was definitely hardcore and I

1:02:39

think I would buy the movie again. I

1:02:42

even bought the sequel to the book and I'm

1:02:44

super excited for Fifty Shades Darker to come out

1:02:46

in theaters. I have a whole year to wait

1:02:48

but I'm really excited for it to come out.

1:02:50

I love the movie so much that I can't

1:02:52

wait. I

1:02:55

went to bed and I

1:02:57

woke up and watched it again and started thinking

1:02:59

about it. Nope. You should totally buy

1:03:01

this movie and you should buy the book. It will

1:03:03

make you feel hot. You

1:03:05

will definitely need a napkin after watching this

1:03:08

movie. Christian

1:03:11

is an amazing actor and he is

1:03:13

so hot. Christian

1:03:17

is an amazing actor. I

1:03:21

would buy this movie 904 million more times. Purchase

1:03:25

this. This story is well written and

1:03:27

whenever I was watching this movie it put me in

1:03:30

an amazing mood. I was always

1:03:32

better after reading these novels and watching this

1:03:34

movie. I would say buy it and I would

1:03:36

say watch it alone. And

1:03:38

then read the book alone too. And then you

1:03:40

will be feeling like a million bucks in no

1:03:42

time. That guy died in an

1:03:44

ocean of his own gin. I

1:03:47

am a mom

1:03:50

and my kids drive me

1:03:52

crazy. They

1:03:56

yell all the time and whenever I get them

1:03:58

down for naps. pull out my Kindle

1:04:00

and I start reading this book or I

1:04:03

bring on my iPad and I watch it.

1:04:05

I forget about being a mom for a

1:04:07

few minutes and I can add some fantasize

1:04:09

about being the character. And then I snap

1:04:11

back into reality when they wake up and

1:04:13

I wait for them to sleep. I start

1:04:16

counting the minutes until they are sleeping so

1:04:18

I can read my book and watch my

1:04:20

movie. I even pull it out while the

1:04:22

kids are watching TV or my husband is

1:04:24

watching the game. I would recommend this movie

1:04:26

to all my girlfriends. It is a hot

1:04:28

read and definitely something I would watch again.

1:04:31

I already have. These

1:04:34

kind of movies are my favorite. I

1:04:36

love the dominance of the male character

1:04:38

and I'm very pleased with my purchase.

1:04:41

Buy this movie for a bit

1:04:43

of hot and heavy romance. You

1:04:45

will not be dissatisfied. Happy watching,

1:04:48

ladies and gentlemen. I

1:04:50

am very happy with the purchase of this movie's five-size. Wow.

1:04:53

Wow. Oh my God.

1:04:57

I feel like that is why these

1:04:59

books took off. Listen,

1:05:04

women have nothing else. We

1:05:06

don't have other books. We don't have other

1:05:09

movies. So we accept whatever you give us.

1:05:11

How to lose a guy in 10 days

1:05:13

in this. Yeah, what do we

1:05:16

have? If this is what you were

1:05:18

given and being like, this is what you want?

1:05:21

I'll take it. Maybe

1:05:23

you feel like Jonathan Daniel Bullock who

1:05:25

says, movie got me laid. I

1:05:28

can dig it. Five stars. And

1:05:32

I bet that's going to be repeated tonight. Someone

1:05:34

is here on a date. They're going to get

1:05:37

laid because of this movie. I can dig it.

1:05:40

Also, Melie Gore-Ero writes, I bought this

1:05:42

from my aunt. It

1:05:45

was well packaged and in great condition. Five

1:05:48

stars. Great gift. Great

1:05:50

gift. Your aunt? Your

1:05:53

elderly aunt? Ants love these books. Ants live

1:05:56

for this. These stories

1:05:58

are big ant energy. And

1:06:01

I will just go to one of the first opinions. This

1:06:05

is something that we got from Jason Crouch. Gives

1:06:08

it one star. He

1:06:10

says, this is the

1:06:12

stupidest movie I've ever watched. And

1:06:15

I never watched it because why

1:06:18

would I? My

1:06:20

wife convinced me to watch it

1:06:23

and I regretted it severely. I

1:06:26

wish I never wasted the money.

1:06:28

It's just porn for women.

1:06:31

And women think it's good because

1:06:33

they enjoy it. But

1:06:37

if you're a man, you

1:06:40

will not enjoy it. Oh,

1:06:43

great. Now my wife's all turned on.

1:06:47

Sucks to be me, guys.

1:06:50

One star got me laid.

1:06:54

My opinion, this movie shouldn't

1:06:57

exist because it should be

1:06:59

treated the same way porn is. One

1:07:02

star. It's just porn for women.

1:07:06

Jason Crouch. Full name. Wow.

1:07:09

I will say one thing

1:07:11

that was really interesting about

1:07:14

this thing was, obviously

1:07:16

there's a lot of parodies of

1:07:18

Fifty Shades of Grey. And

1:07:21

there was a porn parody of Fifty Shades

1:07:23

of Grey made, and Universal

1:07:25

sued them because of similarities. I

1:07:29

guess you really can't... They had

1:07:31

better dialogue, I bet. What's

1:07:33

so crazy about that is genuinely,

1:07:35

this is just Twilight fanfic. All

1:07:37

right, so just a quick

1:07:40

question because none of us has seen the second one.

1:07:42

I wanted to end each night by just bold

1:07:45

predictions. What happens in the next movie?

1:07:48

We don't know. Don't let us over right or wrong. That's

1:07:50

so fun. I do like your

1:07:53

idea that it

1:07:55

will flip. I think that's got to be

1:07:57

right, yeah. I have to... feel

1:08:00

like we're gonna I would love it if like

1:08:03

does it become like a murder mystery with

1:08:07

anywhere please now here's what

1:08:09

I would love I would love

1:08:11

to find out actually that his story

1:08:15

about being 15 and

1:08:17

this woman was a lie I don't

1:08:20

think that happens but like that's that's

1:08:22

sort of my sound and I thought

1:08:24

it was interesting too that it's then revealed

1:08:26

that he's been to dinner with that mrs.

1:08:28

Robinson one does that character show up and

1:08:31

who is that like you

1:08:34

know I'm trying to turn your trowel honey

1:08:38

I don't know I think

1:08:41

in one of them they get married

1:08:43

because I think I remember a trailer

1:08:45

oh okay I think they get

1:08:48

married I do

1:08:50

I really think you know the

1:08:52

two trailer that might have been

1:08:54

it well also I'm assuming and

1:08:56

and forgive me if I'm just grossly wrong

1:08:59

but if it follows the general arc

1:09:01

of Twilight they will get married they will

1:09:03

get pregnant and the baby will eat itself

1:09:07

the baby will eat its way out

1:09:09

of her belly is that what happened

1:09:11

yes and then it will it will

1:09:13

imprint on what is

1:09:15

real yes what are you talking about

1:09:17

okay I mean what am I talking

1:09:19

about out of her belly yeah it

1:09:21

puts the lotion in the basket it

1:09:25

really does do that though yeah she's

1:09:28

dead no how

1:09:30

can you survive a baby eating its way

1:09:32

out of you don't you wish

1:09:38

you were here on Friday to find out

1:09:40

I hope I hope that the gray industry

1:09:42

is craters

1:09:49

that's that's what I think I think

1:09:52

that I think that gray industries is

1:09:54

going downhill we know that business was

1:09:56

going poorly I think that it craters

1:09:58

he spirals she goes out for fucking a bunch

1:10:00

of people, she gets a lot of sexual experience.

1:10:02

And then like, that's what I think. That'd

1:10:05

be nice. Pull him up out of his depression

1:10:07

is what I think. But so he has

1:10:09

no money anymore? I don't want to, no, we don't want to

1:10:11

ever see that. You're

1:10:14

absolutely right. I would like to- There

1:10:16

has to be wealth to a

1:10:18

degree that is like, again, not

1:10:20

right. No one

1:10:22

person should have this amount. That's

1:10:24

what I'm looking for. I agree. Regis

1:10:26

that he sold her car. I

1:10:30

thought that, how- It's like

1:10:32

a giant garage. Keep it. If you

1:10:35

gift her a car, wonderful. Do

1:10:37

not sell her vintage bug. By

1:10:40

the way, she got Toriyemo CD in

1:10:42

there that she's, now what are you going to do with

1:10:44

that? That's what I

1:10:46

want. That's what's your water bottle. You are reading.

1:10:48

Okay, so I didn't- This

1:10:50

Cinderella story is rotten. I

1:10:53

didn't believe that he actually sold it. Oh,

1:10:55

you think it's going to be in the

1:10:57

sequel? It might be, that's my prediction. In

1:10:59

his Jay Leno's garage full of cars. It's

1:11:02

like a jitter about sequels. I would

1:11:04

love it if

1:11:06

Christian Grey was played by Jay Leno.

1:11:09

That's my recasting. Who

1:11:12

do I want? Jay Leno. Denim

1:11:15

on denim. And

1:11:18

here's my casting. Jay Leno

1:11:20

now and Dakota Johnson now.

1:11:23

Just age it up. Oh, God. What

1:11:27

if in the, here's the thing, what

1:11:29

if in the second movie the

1:11:32

actress who plays the Mrs. Robinson

1:11:34

is Melanie Griffith? Ew.

1:11:38

Ew. Ew. Ew. Somebody

1:11:41

lost their mind. Did

1:11:44

anybody when they were watching this

1:11:46

movie, I was in

1:11:48

a Whole Foods watching it. And you were

1:11:50

also in the green room watching it. Yeah, I was.

1:11:53

I really packed it in. But

1:11:55

that's what he said. But

1:11:59

my main. response over and

1:12:01

over again was out loud. Eww.

1:12:03

Eww. Did anyone else have that? Eww. Eww.

1:12:08

Like that. That was my main reaction

1:12:11

to this film. Eww. I wasn't even eww.

1:12:13

I was just kind of

1:12:15

like, alright. I wanted to be,

1:12:17

I wanted the unrated version. I

1:12:19

watched the unrated version. Wait a minute. What?

1:12:22

Where's that? Seven minutes

1:12:24

extra stuff. Seven minutes of heaven?

1:12:26

There's seven minutes of extra heaven?

1:12:29

It's all pubes. Just

1:12:31

pubes. More

1:12:33

pubes. No,

1:12:35

actually it's more awesome pubes. That's

1:12:39

the best part. Would

1:12:42

you recommend this movie, Jason? Fuck yeah.

1:12:45

June? Absolutely. Jess?

1:12:48

Eww. I would

1:12:50

say yes. I think that there's

1:12:52

more here on Rediscovery. I

1:12:56

like it. I'm excited to go

1:12:58

into next episode where we talk

1:13:00

about the sequel of this film.

1:13:02

Fifty Shades of Darker or

1:13:04

Deeper? I don't know. It's the second one. We're

1:13:07

going to watch that. And now, thank you everybody

1:13:09

for coming out here tonight. That's

1:13:14

our show. Thanks again to our honorary fourth

1:13:16

host, Jessica St. Clair, and the

1:13:19

amazing staff at Largo. Do not

1:13:21

worry. We will be releasing all

1:13:23

of our episodes from our Fifty Shades

1:13:26

of Grey series throughout the next couple

1:13:28

of months. So stay tuned for more

1:13:30

coverage on the least sexy sex movies

1:13:32

ever made. Now, if you want

1:13:34

to feel like you are a part of our Fifty Shades

1:13:36

of Grey live show, you can get the shirt that we

1:13:38

designed for the audience.

1:13:40

That's right. We designed a grey

1:13:43

corporation shirt. That's right. Christian Grey

1:13:45

has a nonsensical company that includes

1:13:47

business, telecommunications, independent publishing,

1:13:50

blow-dry bars, and charity. And

1:13:52

you can buy that

1:13:54

shirt at tpublic.com/stores slash hdtgm.

1:13:57

And if you've been dying to attend one of our live shows, well, you're

1:13:59

in luck. and luck. We still have some

1:14:01

tickets left for our tour in the

1:14:03

UK and Ireland. I think that the

1:14:06

most tickets are available in Belfast, but

1:14:08

we just sold out in Glasgow and

1:14:10

Dublin and we are moments away from

1:14:12

selling out in London. So get those

1:14:14

tickets and head to hdtgm.com to find

1:14:16

out what movies we're doing and to

1:14:18

purchase tickets and just let you know,

1:14:20

check out the movie Scramble. June appears

1:14:22

in this film. It's an independent film.

1:14:25

That's really funny about a 35 year

1:14:27

old woman who goes on a quest

1:14:30

to freeze her eggs and it's not as

1:14:33

easy as she thought it would be. The

1:14:35

movie is hilarious. June is great. I love

1:14:38

this movie. Check it out. Leah McKendrick wrote

1:14:40

and directed it. It's fantastic. And I know

1:14:42

I've mentioned this a few times, but my

1:14:44

book Joyful Recollections of Trauma is now available

1:14:47

to preorder and preordering is so important. It's

1:14:49

actually more important than buying it the week

1:14:51

it comes out. So preorder my book right

1:14:53

now. And if you do that, save your

1:14:56

receipt, head to my website and you can

1:14:58

sign up to get a personalized postcard from

1:15:00

me plus access to a part of my

1:15:02

website where I will have exclusive material

1:15:04

that no one has ever seen. I'm

1:15:07

talking about pictures and videos and it's

1:15:09

only for preordering people only. I appreciate

1:15:11

all the support I've already gotten from

1:15:13

our amazing How Does This Get Made

1:15:15

audience and preordering this book. And I

1:15:17

just want to let you know, I

1:15:19

really, really appreciate. So you're going to buy something. I'm

1:15:21

going to give you something and my

1:15:24

hand might fall off, but I can't wait to

1:15:26

sign something for you. And as always, if you

1:15:28

have a correction or a mission from this last

1:15:30

episode, we want to know about them. Go to

1:15:32

our discord at discord.gg slash hdtgm or leave

1:15:34

me a voicemail at six one nine. Paul

1:15:36

ask, then make sure you tune in next

1:15:38

week for our last looks follow up episode

1:15:40

to hear me respond to your messages. Plus

1:15:42

Jason will stop by for a chat. And

1:15:44

as always, we will announce our next movie.

1:15:46

Remember, you can find us everywhere online at

1:15:48

hdtgm. And if you love the show, please

1:15:50

tell your friends that's the way the word

1:15:53

spreads. And if you're listening on Apple podcast,

1:15:55

make sure you are following us. And last

1:15:57

but not least, I got to say thank

1:15:59

you to all of our listeners. who support

1:16:01

this show and our entire behind the scenes

1:16:03

staff who keeps this show running. I am

1:16:05

talking about our producers, Scott Sawney, Molly Reynolds,

1:16:07

our movie picking producer Avril Halley, our associate

1:16:09

producer Jess Cisneros and our engineers, Casey Holford

1:16:11

and Rich Garcia. That's all I got. Bye

1:16:14

for now. See you next week.

1:16:16

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a Big Mac or drive a car,

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you could stop for

1:16:28

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1:16:30

the car seats or use your McDonald's bag as

1:16:33

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