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2:00

means. We

2:27

are in Seattle at Bumbershoot

2:29

and man oh man we have an amazing

2:32

movie today but first let's welcome my

2:34

two co-hosts. Please welcome Jason Van Zukas.

2:39

Alright. June

2:46

Diane Rayfield. And

2:51

our very special guest, the first

2:53

returning guest on how did this

2:55

get made, Doug Benson. Here

3:05

we go. What's up jerks? This

3:11

movie, wow. I haven't seen it

3:13

in a long time Roadhouse and

3:15

it is, it's amazing. This movie

3:17

is fucking fantastic. Yeah. It's

3:19

quite good. I think it's

3:22

probably the best, like the best

3:24

B movie there is and there's so

3:26

much insane stuff in it. Like it's

3:28

a mainstream movie but it's insane. Just

3:30

when the movie starts to slow down

3:32

I feel like shit happens that is

3:34

just like oh we're gonna drive a

3:36

monster truck through a car shop right

3:38

now? Alright cool. You

3:40

know a movie is good when in the

3:42

first three minutes a woman is being

3:44

kicked in the pussy. Yeah. Well

3:47

that's a crazy moment too because she calls in

3:50

one of the first things in the movie, she calls

3:52

a guy who she's with at a bar an asshole

3:55

and then he kicks

3:57

her off the stool. She stabs him first.

4:00

No, she didn't stab him. Yeah, he stabbed

4:02

the money. She stabbed the money. She

4:04

said she was more. Yeah, sorry, you're right. He gives her

4:06

100 bucks. This is also an era

4:09

where everybody's carrying $100 bills inexplicably

4:12

like, here's a $100 bill, she stabbed

4:14

it. He kicks her in the fucking

4:16

pussy. Every

4:19

single person in this movie carries a

4:21

knife. It's as if there is no

4:23

such thing as guns. Yes. It

4:25

really is like, well, I've got my knife that's strapped

4:27

to my leg or I've got my knife over here.

4:30

Everybody's got knives. And the knives are super

4:32

big, like almost comically, and the guns are

4:34

tiny. Yeah. That's true. The knives per capita

4:36

in this city, in this little outskirts of

4:39

Kansas City, where are they in again? I

4:41

forget the name of the town. Oh,

4:44

Jasper. Jasper, yeah. Good old Jasper.

4:46

Good old Jasper. But it starts,

4:48

that first fight with the $100 bill is

4:50

in New York, right? That's his first bar, isn't

4:52

it? No, he's not in New York anymore, right?

4:54

I thought his car is just New York plates.

4:56

Where's the first bar that he's at? The place

4:58

where what's his name finds him and is like,

5:00

I know who you are. I think it's undisclosed.

5:03

It's just in another. Somewhere else. It's the city,

5:05

though. Yeah. I do think the

5:07

movie starts off very boldly, because you start

5:09

off, you know, Patrick Swayze is

5:11

being watched as he's being a cooler, which

5:13

is not a bouncer. This is a guy

5:15

above the bouncers. Coolers. Well, Paul, you don't

5:17

have to explain it, because everybody knows what

5:19

a cooler is, right? Was

5:21

William H. Macy a cooler in that movie, The Cooler?

5:23

That's a different kind of cooler. Yeah.

5:26

Patrick Swayze doesn't go places and make

5:28

people's luck change while

5:30

playing cards. He's the

5:32

Uber bouncer. He's the Uber bouncer who

5:34

has three rules, but it's a bold

5:37

move to have a fight scene. And

5:39

the first time you reveal him full,

5:41

he's wearing like Z-Cavaricis. Like, I'm not

5:43

afraid of a bouncer in pleated pants.

5:46

Oh, yeah. And he is

5:48

later in the movie wearing what

5:50

appears to be like a blousy

5:52

jeans and a karate gi as

5:54

a shirt. Yeah. That karate gi

5:56

shirt is pretty amazing. He is

5:59

constantly wearing. I'm pretty sure

6:01

women's clothes. Hahaha Jonah

6:04

Ray called that karate casual. Hahaha

6:08

When we did a live interruption of the

6:10

movie one time. I

6:12

love that he also is unfazed

6:14

by being stabbed. He

6:17

gets stabbed in the first five minutes, doesn't

6:19

even blink. Doesn't even

6:21

question it like, oh, alright, here we go.

6:24

Come outside. It is a bad stab too.

6:26

Oh yeah. But he stitches it up himself

6:28

because he's a fucking bad ass.

6:31

He's like, he's like five foot

6:33

five, a hundred

6:35

pounds of pure power. He

6:38

must be standing on like an

6:40

apple box every scene. Kelly

6:43

Lynch's love interest literally is

6:45

a giant. He is

6:47

miniature. They hammer him with

6:49

the I thought you'd be bigger thing. Like

6:52

they really make a big point out of how small he is.

6:55

And also we're going to talk about like the

6:57

ridiculousness of Patrick Swayze being a bouncer. Then

7:00

Ben Gazzera is the bad guy. Even

7:02

in this Ben Gazzera is an old

7:04

man. Like he's like in his like

7:06

late forties, early fifties. Like he's no

7:08

match for the 20 year old Patrick

7:11

Swayze even in his blousy clothes.

7:14

And he has his sweatpants. And he has

7:16

that crazy scene where he's just driving in

7:18

his caddy singing along to. Love that. What's

7:21

he listening to? He's so like 80s Richie Rich Ex-Act. I'm

7:26

so rich I'm not. I

7:28

use the whole road. That's

7:30

how rich I am. That's the funny I have.

7:33

I put a dog on top of the car

7:35

and I use the whole road. The

7:37

way that they show that he's a bad guy in

7:39

the beginning is that he takes over the whole road.

7:42

He also has late night parties like swim

7:44

parties. Oh and he rides in a helicopter.

7:46

He rides in a helicopter and he commutes

7:49

in a helicopter. By

7:51

the way he commutes to where? To town? He

7:53

knows. Because his

7:56

business appears to be extorting money from

7:58

the town people. only

8:00

Jasper which is a tiny town

8:02

in Texas and he

8:04

appears to be a multi-millionaire by extorting

8:07

them for protection money. He is

8:09

like a one-man mafia for

8:12

a ghost town in Texas. They could seriously have...

8:15

But how much money could those places really be

8:17

bringing in? Because he's only taking 10% of

8:20

like... he only takes 10% of the auto shop.

8:22

Like that's like what? Like maybe 15, 20 bucks?

8:25

Maybe. Maybe six people a week

8:27

come in for wipers and oil.

8:31

Oh! I showed Jun

8:33

this. If you watch that scene... I didn't put it

8:35

here because it doesn't really fit for the podcast but

8:38

if you watch a scene where he's

8:40

getting wipers for Patrick Swayze's character you

8:42

can see a prop master handing the

8:44

wipers through. It's like literally handing it

8:46

through the corner of the screen. Go

8:49

back and watch that scene. My favorite Ben

8:51

Gazzara line that establishes... he's having... he has

8:53

like a whole speech to Patrick Swayze about

8:55

how powerful he is. And he goes, J.C.

8:57

Penney is coming here because of me. What?

9:04

That's your brag? We're getting a

9:06

Walgreens. That's how powerful I am.

9:09

You get the max for the minimum at TJ

9:11

Maxx because of me. KB

9:14

Toys is rumored to be developing

9:16

in our town square. Need

9:20

I bring up Build-A-Bear? We're

9:24

getting two of them. I'm talking to

9:26

the people at Orange Julius. They're not

9:28

ready to commit yet. The

9:33

other thing about this small town besides the

9:35

fact that he's extorting them as a rich

9:37

millionaire is the fact that there's

9:40

no cops. In this

9:42

movie there's no penalties for

9:45

furious crimes. Such as murder?

9:47

Yeah! Swayze

9:50

straight up murders a dude.

9:52

Nothing happened. Nothing!

9:55

He gives a hero. He gets flowers.

9:57

He rips a dude's throat out. Zero!

10:00

row happens. Let me just

10:02

give you an idea of what the bar

10:04

fights in this town look

10:06

like. Obviously Patrick Swayze has recruited to come

10:08

to this town because this guy has big

10:10

plans for his bar. Wait, can I just

10:12

for one second. That guy, wait, it's Kevin

10:14

Togg, right? His name? Okay. He's trying to

10:16

recruit Patrick Swayze and this is what he

10:18

says about his bar. It

10:20

used to be a pretty sweet deal. Now

10:22

it's the kind of place where they sweep

10:24

up eyeballs after closing. Sweep up the eyeballs,

10:27

man. Plural eyeballs. Oh, I

10:30

guess they, we locked

10:35

the doors, let's sweep up the eyeballs. Why

10:38

don't they just have the eyeball club

10:40

meet somewhere else? Guys,

10:43

stop bringing these eyeballs into the bar. Come on.

10:45

Your bottles break all

10:47

the time. JK, it's just

10:49

peeled grapes. They're

10:51

really good. It's scary for Halloween. All right. So this

10:54

is, this is a fight

10:56

that breaks out in the mid

10:58

after a man, a very rich

11:02

or a man that has a one with very

11:04

nice bosoms. He's like, Hey, you want to feel

11:06

my girlfriend's breath for $20? He says you can

11:08

kiss him for $20. Guy goes over group sir

11:13

for a little bit of time. And then he's like,

11:15

I don't have $20. And then all hell breaks out.

11:20

Before you play this ball, she seems

11:23

totally fine with what's happening. Oh, and

11:25

the guy, yeah, the guy that is

11:27

offering it is disgusting.

11:29

It's gross. It's sweat and

11:32

looks like a monster. Also,

11:35

there's a great line in here too. I'll, I'll play

11:37

this first. Here we go. This is a normal one.

12:00

Yeah! This

12:05

is a normal night. That

12:09

is a normal night for that bar. It's

12:12

the most insane fight scene ever. That makes

12:15

sense. Just because one man didn't have $20,

12:17

that broke out. One

12:19

person. Immediately. It escalates so quickly too. It

12:21

is like as if everybody is ready to

12:23

fight. And it's just that one guy pushes

12:25

the other guy and then it's like, Yeah,

12:29

we all have permission. Let's

12:31

go down to the double-dosing way for fighting. Also

12:45

on the stuff you don't let me explain did

12:47

you know with your Walmart plus membership you can

12:49

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12:53

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13:04

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13:06

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13:08

you eat all your snacks that you

13:11

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13:13

pantry for movie night. How dare they!

13:15

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13:17

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registration required. How did this

13:49

get made? We'll be going

13:51

to the UK in March and April, not

13:54

just the UK. We're also going to Ireland.

13:56

And you know what? I

13:58

am excited to go overseas.

14:00

but I realized that

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while I'm spending money over there, I could

14:04

actually be making some money

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on the side over here by hosting my

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didn't realize that their space could even be

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an Airbnb. I mean hosting can easily fit

14:27

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way to earn some extra money. So if

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you have a home but

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much at airbnb.com/host. Today's

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TV slash bonkers to get 50%

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off your first month. There's

15:50

two little great lines. Throughout this whole movie

15:52

there's a lot of ADR where they record

15:54

the lines after the movie's shot and won

15:56

during a fight scene. Guys like, God damn

15:58

it! You're ripping my best shirt. That's

16:01

like during I see where he's getting like pummeled on

16:03

the ground. Did anyone else

16:05

notice that the music the band's playing

16:07

is so low? Yes. In this movie

16:10

like while the band's playing you hear

16:12

people on the dance floor scream out,

16:14

yeah! Way louder than the music itself.

16:16

The other thing they have is they

16:18

clearly were like when you guys are

16:20

talking like the woman that's the waitress

16:22

what's her name? Baby Joan Cusack? Yes,

16:25

who plays Luke's sister on Gilmore Girls

16:27

who is like she's his pal. Ashley

16:29

Wilhoit. What's that? Nobody. She,

16:33

they were clearly in one scene they were like well

16:35

we're gonna have music and stuff so talk loud. So

16:38

she is literally screaming at Patrick Slazy

16:40

in one scene even though there is

16:42

barely no music in the scene at

16:44

all. She's like what's your name?

16:48

Oh, I heard about you!

16:50

I thought you'd be bigger!

16:53

And clearly that was the first. What did you

16:55

say? There's

16:58

so many great non like bad

17:00

insult lines. I wrote this down too.

17:02

It says a girl comes

17:04

over she says vodka rocks then

17:06

one of the guys on the

17:08

spectrum goes how about nipple to

17:10

nipple? And then I

17:12

wrote this line I wrote that line down too. And

17:15

then she replies I can do

17:17

that myself. What

17:20

are these? Nipples to nipple?

17:23

You can't do that. Nipple to nipple. I

17:26

would like to see that. You do see

17:28

her tits later but she definitely can't do

17:30

it. Will

17:33

you see her having sex with

17:35

the bartender who is on break?

17:37

That's a different girl. That's Ben

17:40

Gazzara's girl. Isn't it who

17:42

orders vodka rocks? That

17:44

seems crazy though when Patrick Slazy catches them

17:47

having sex in the inventory closet because

17:49

he opens the door they're in darkness

17:51

they are flooded with light. I mean

17:53

it's like a spotlight hit them. They

17:55

keep on fucking for a while. sexy

18:00

in that scene and the guy pulling

18:02

up his tighty whitey's. Oh yeah. Good

18:04

be gone it's so uncomfortable. But

18:07

when he's having sex with her he does say you're

18:09

gonna be my regular Saturday night

18:11

thing. That's

18:14

like a sexy thing to say. Girls

18:16

like being called a thing right? He

18:18

also says though I think to her earlier

18:21

in that scene when he's at a table

18:23

with her, man you're so well

18:25

put together. Yeah. He

18:27

goes I get

18:29

off it too and I'm gonna get you

18:32

off. That guy

18:34

has a million

18:36

great lines in

18:39

this movie. I gotta

18:41

say I think I do like Ben Gazera because

18:43

Ben Gazera to me you know he's rich in

18:45

this him but he kind of feels like Richie

18:47

Rich like because there is a scene like where

18:50

he like longing that he looks at like Patrick

18:53

Swayze and he's like riding an RV. You ever

18:55

remember that scene where he's just like riding an

18:57

RV on his own property? Oh you mean when

18:59

Patrick Swayze is shirtless and sweatpants doing Tai Chi?

19:01

Oh yeah. That happens for

19:04

a long time. A bunch. It

19:06

happens a bunch. Patrick

19:09

Swayze is a guy who will read philosophy,

19:11

do Tai Chi, smoke

19:14

cigarettes. That's

19:16

high-tech. They are bareback fuck Kelly Lynch

19:18

because it's the 80s so we don't

19:20

need condoms right? Wrong. AIDS

19:23

just happened. This

19:26

may be the reason why AIDS broke out

19:28

this town. Everybody's Jasper.

19:30

There is no AIDS monkey.

19:32

It was Jasper. This

19:35

movie is all raw dogging.

19:38

Everybody's raw dogging

19:40

everybody. It is filthy.

19:44

I'm assuming it's Texas. It

19:46

is like Chlamydia herpes capital

19:48

of the world. It

19:50

starts here, goes there, they're ground zero.

19:53

She's a doctor. Yeah. She's

19:55

a doctor. I don't think that's happening.

19:57

I don't think you're a I'm

20:00

sure you're safe, put it in me raw,

20:02

who cares? Well she

20:05

knows that he's safe because he carries his

20:07

own medical files with him. And when she

20:09

looks through it she's like, oh, you went

20:11

to NYU. Why would that be

20:13

in a medical file? He

20:18

went to NYU for philosophy. She's like, well great,

20:20

I'm going to go seduce you wearing my picnic

20:22

dress. Which is basically

20:24

like a tablecloth of a picnic.

20:27

A smock. No, no, in that one

20:29

it's a picnic dress. Later she shows

20:31

up at his house to fuck and

20:33

she is wearing a smock. She's wearing

20:35

such a lacy, weird smock that, and

20:37

no underwear. And no bra. And

20:39

no bra. Do you want to play the second?

20:41

It's called Easy Access for Raw Doggins. Yeah. And

20:45

Swayze, by the way, not wearing underwear.

20:48

And later you see Sam Elliott's, you

20:50

see Sam Elliott's pubes also not wearing

20:52

underwear. Nobody wears underwear in this

20:54

movie. They got to

20:57

be ready or raw dog at

20:59

any moment. Guys, they're raw dog. It's

21:01

commandogenic. It should have been

21:03

called Raw Dog House. Here

21:07

is the sex scene. There's no nudity,

21:09

so kids don't worry about it. This

21:11

is the sex scene. Here we go.

21:15

What's he doing with his shoulders? He

21:19

does so much shoulder work in this scene. She

21:23

goes for it. Look

21:26

at his shoulders. No

21:32

underwear. And

21:40

I'm in. Do

21:45

we have no conversation about same sex?

21:47

Nope. Nothing. Nothing. This is the

21:49

real Dirty Dancing. Oh yeah. Now

21:53

look here at the perspective of their body sizes in

21:55

a minute. She's

21:58

dead giant. She's Penny. She's

22:01

giant and he's tight. And

22:03

that fireplace cannot feel good against her

22:05

back. No. The worst

22:07

place to have sex is up against a hard

22:09

brick. Uneven,

22:11

jagged brick. He

22:14

is barely as tall as her neck. Why

22:19

is she laughing? He

22:22

just told her a good one about her dick being

22:24

in her neck. Oh, he does so

22:26

much tongue work too. Oh yeah. She's

22:28

looking at her bigger body. Her torso

22:30

is as big as him from foot to head.

22:33

He's like, it's like a dance sequence. They

22:36

do dance, right? They do dance. All

22:39

of his fight moves are dance moves as

22:41

well. Well,

22:45

the big fight scene looks like

22:47

a choreographed ballet between two guys

22:49

who are not fighters. I mean,

22:51

Patrick Swayze is fighting a

22:54

guy who looks like a bizarro, like Patrick

22:56

Duffy. You know? And

22:59

they're just like, there's a lot of dancing. Somewhere

23:01

right now, Patrick Duffy's like, someone's talking about

23:03

me. I know it.

23:05

I can feel it. Someone is talking about me. Hooray.

23:09

All right. We talked

23:12

about the monster truck. Did we talk about his

23:14

mock turtleneck? Oh no. What mock

23:16

turtleneck? He's wearing like the black mock turtleneck.

23:19

He looks like Steve Jobs in one scene.

23:21

He's like, he's crazy. It's

23:23

when he's telling them the three rules be nice, blah, blah,

23:25

blah. He's wearing a Steve Jobs

23:27

mock turtleneck. I half expect them to be

23:30

like, but there's one more thing. That's

23:33

a Steve Jobs line, guys. He is RIT Steve

23:36

Jobs. Did

23:40

you notice that Keith David was in this movie? Keith

23:43

David has one line, which is

23:46

whiskey's running low. That's it. Main

23:48

build in the credits. Yep. Forest

23:51

builds person in this movie. Does

23:53

he ever even help out in a fight? Nope. He's

23:56

a huge guy. Nope. He's

23:58

just a bartender. Clearly his subplot. was

24:00

cut out because it would break the rule of

24:02

having a black person in this movie. They

24:05

did not, like there's only white people here

24:07

and yeah, but that's, I don't know what

24:09

happened. I want someone, I hope someone had

24:11

some Roadhouse trivia, what happened with Keith David's

24:14

great character? Keith David is here I think

24:16

and he's ready, I'm just kidding. Thank

24:20

you very much. There was an ADR

24:22

line in there as well during the

24:24

first kind of big fight where somebody

24:26

goes, that's Dalton, he's our new cooler.

24:28

As if

24:30

somebody is saying to someone else like, no

24:32

duh, obviously we've got a cooler and he's

24:34

the new one. But wait,

24:36

but wait, what about the whole fact

24:38

that the coolers have some sort of

24:40

network in which they communicate? At one

24:43

point Patrick Swayze calls up Sam

24:45

Elliott and goes, yep, I heard you're

24:47

working in Jasper. How? Are

24:50

they on like an internet message board?

24:52

Like they're getting on Prodigy posting like

24:54

I'll be here, what's going on here?

24:56

There's no, they're like, yeah, I heard

24:58

about you. Oh yeah, I heard about

25:00

that guy. That's a crazy scene too

25:02

though because after Swayze says I'm having

25:04

a really hard time, there's a lot

25:06

going on in this town, Sam Elliott just

25:08

says, gotta go. And hangs up

25:10

the phone. Swayze in that kind of macho

25:12

code is clearly calling to ask for help,

25:15

but can't say I need help. And Sam

25:17

Elliott doesn't take that, doesn't pick up on

25:19

it and just hangs up on it. Sam

25:21

Elliott is working at a bar that

25:24

is having not a wet t-shirt contest,

25:26

a wet G string content. Cause

25:29

the ladies are already toppled. So

25:31

they're just spraying down their vaginas. But

25:35

they did, everybody can get a yeast

25:37

infection. Oh,

25:40

too gross? Like a

25:42

really gross one, like with

25:44

discharge. Okay. But it's only

25:47

Alfredo guys. Oh, I'm

25:50

going to do this. We're going there. I

25:52

have a clip of some,

25:55

uh, right now. We have a bunch

25:57

of clips of yeast infections gonna

26:00

show this is a

26:03

protective ladies clean it

26:05

up I also this

26:07

is a small moment but the owner that

26:10

guy Kevin Tye the owner of the double

26:12

deuce at one point you know the

26:14

bar is in great disrepair before Patrick

26:16

Swayze shows up and he walks by the

26:18

phone and on the wall says for a

26:21

great fuck call and there's a number and

26:23

he's like oh boy takes out

26:25

a pen first he looks first he looks around to

26:27

be like is anybody looking at what I'm gonna do

26:29

by the way it's his bar you could do whatever

26:31

he wants and then he

26:33

looks around pulls out a pen there

26:35

baby yes there are a little baby

26:37

in this show this

26:40

baby is learning everything he needs to

26:42

do about life right now is

26:45

there a teeny tiny baby that I just said

26:47

vaginal discharge in front of we showed

26:51

that teeny tiny baby a sex scene and

26:53

we've talked about vaginal discharge how old

26:55

is the baby oh yeah

26:59

now you're keeping your secrets must be a pretty must

27:01

be a pretty young baby if he wanted a half

27:03

yes one and a half one and a half okay

27:05

that's too old if it was a baby I would

27:07

like to know how old it is if

27:10

you brought a tiny baby please bring it up here I would

27:12

like to hold it for the rest of the show because I'm

27:16

only gonna say more horrible things and it's

27:18

only gonna be funnier if I'm holding a

27:20

baby bring

27:25

us your baby Andrew

27:29

Dave Clay held a baby for the last six years of

27:31

his act is doing those nurse errands

27:33

so you see this thing for

27:35

a great fuck call looks around

27:37

and changes it to Buick like

27:40

he makes the F into a B adds

27:42

an I and then changes the K into

27:44

an H or no no yeah well I

27:46

don't know you fuck you no doesn't

27:49

say sorry guys sorry sorry

27:52

for a second no it doesn't change the K

27:55

Buick is right I

27:57

don't know why there isn't a

27:59

hilarious scene where one of those you know

28:01

dirt bags that works at the bar that probably

28:03

wrote that answers is a phone and goes for

28:05

the 40th time I don't have a Buick that

28:10

would be amazing it's

28:13

keep David's whole plot line that's

28:18

the excise story oh

28:21

man I have a I have a

28:23

couple clips I didn't know if just

28:26

you guys get a sense of the villain that Patrick

28:28

Swayze has to fight I

28:31

I want baby you like this

28:33

baby give me your baby you

28:38

brought it offer it as a

28:40

sacrifice this

28:43

is um this is how tough

28:46

Ben Gazera is beating up his gang all

28:48

right so here we go sorry

28:50

discuss me oh kinda you want to know why you

28:52

discuss me go why boss because

28:58

you're a bleeder you bleed too

29:00

much you

29:02

are a messy bleeder ah my

29:06

weakness in this movie you got no

29:08

endurance for paper your balls in the

29:10

back your neck bleed too much check

29:13

out that monster truck in the bay

29:15

you'll be fine good look at it

29:17

boo help

29:19

him up watch it you're

29:26

gonna be fine and you know

29:28

why because I like

29:30

you well

29:35

by the way they're casually driving that man

29:37

for that scene so they have pulled to the

29:39

house in a monster truck there is

29:41

a scene later in the movie where Patrick

29:43

Swayze finishes work for the night comes out

29:46

to the parking lot there's no cars there

29:48

but Kelly Lynch is standing there provocatively and

29:50

next to her Jeep and they

29:52

get in her Jeep and they drive away and

29:54

the two dudes have been spying

29:57

on them in the parking lot in

29:59

a monster truck. That's

30:02

correct. It is as if he like walks

30:04

out the door there is a Jeep and a

30:06

hot girl and there's a monster truck on there.

30:09

That giant monster truck. Which he ignores and it's

30:11

just like well here's my girl I guess I'm

30:13

gonna raw dog her for a little while. And

30:16

then the bad guys are like hey hey hey hey

30:18

we got you now. Like if you're gonna stake someone

30:21

out don't do it in like the piggy

30:23

in like a truck

30:25

that is a two story

30:27

truck. But that

30:29

monster truck is amazing. The monster truck comes into

30:32

play later on when Ben Gazzaris starts treating

30:34

the day. The town gets behind Dalton obviously because

30:36

Patrick Siles is the best. And then he's like

30:38

I gotta teach him a lesson. So he blows

30:40

up an auto parts store

30:43

and then he just lets a monster truck

30:45

drive through the showroom of a

30:47

car dealership and destroy everyone of the

30:49

car. There is no law. Yeah

30:51

but just in terms of his

30:53

business plan too like he wants

30:55

more money from these establishments. He's

30:57

destroying all of them. Like there's no. He wants

31:00

everybody to stay in line. He's like you gotta

31:02

you gotta pay me my money and you gotta

31:04

stay in line because he destroys the blows up

31:06

the auto parts. There

31:08

are explosions in the left and right

31:11

that are so big that they could

31:13

they literally are like it'll be like

31:16

like a little bit of an explosion. It'll

31:18

be like oh no everything's okay. Oh no

31:20

no reds auto shop is on fire. And

31:22

then the place will blow up like Hiroshima.

31:25

Like it will be an enormous

31:28

explosion. And normally these are just like wood

31:30

cabin kind of places that they're blowing up

31:32

that they would not have this much explain.

31:34

You wouldn't need that much to blow up

31:36

these places. Yeah but they are like they're

31:38

every place is a gas factory. Even

31:43

there's even at the end when

31:45

Patrick Swayze lets his Mercedes loose

31:47

that blows up like a crazy

31:49

thing too ignites on fire. Lonnie

31:52

Anderson's I call her like Bobo Lonnie

31:54

Anderson. Oh just Ben de Verez girlfriend.

31:57

Yeah. Oh she gets a classic

31:59

80s movie. in that she gets out of

32:01

line so she gets beat up a little. Just

32:04

a little. By the way, when Patrick

32:06

Swayze walks into his home and sees

32:08

her there and sees that like she's

32:10

his girl, she's doing a workout. Gazzara's

32:12

girl. Gazzara's girl. She's

32:14

doing like an 80s workout and has clearly

32:17

as a black eye but instead of turning

32:19

her face she continues to look at Patrick

32:21

Swayze and just covers one eye. Don't

32:24

see it. You don't see it now.

32:26

It's covered. I feel

32:28

like this is an era when it was like,

32:31

oh no, we gotta tell people it's not cool

32:33

to hit ladies. Because

32:35

up until then apparently it was. I feel like people

32:37

were just like punching ladies is cool. Well I mean

32:40

that's crazy. Patrick Swayze, he's gonna step up and be

32:42

like uh-uh. Well I'm not going to though. That's

32:44

why Kelly, what's her face as

32:46

a doctor in the movie because it's also like

32:48

late 80s, early 90s counterpoint

32:50

to all these weird like hoochies

32:53

running around. That baby

32:55

agrees. Your baby. I

32:57

want that baby. I'm

32:59

gonna get it too. You gotta pour this mic. Why don't

33:02

you just go stand near it. I'm gonna come, I'm gonna

33:04

find that baby you guys. But

33:06

the beat up girlfriend of Ben Gazzara also does

33:08

like a strip tease in the middle of the

33:10

movie to reveal the biggest

33:12

granny panties of all time. They're

33:15

so crazy. They're granny panty

33:17

songs which is the

33:19

wildest combination I ever did. The

33:21

wide back and then it gets real narrow at

33:24

the bottom right? Yeah. And

33:26

then the white cotton pant, it's unsettling

33:28

how especially, because you know songs exist

33:30

because we've seen it earlier at the

33:33

G-string contest. So she should, first of

33:35

all she's the only person in this

33:37

movie that I'm convinced wears underwear. She

33:40

is. Yeah. That is

33:42

for sure true. If you're gonna wear underwear make

33:44

it provocative. Her and the guy in tighty whiteys.

33:46

Yeah, I can see him pull those up. You

33:48

only can wear underwear if it's weird. Wait

33:51

a second. Maybe only the bad guys

33:53

in this movie wear underwear. That's

33:56

what the mini exam. Bad guys wear underwear.

33:58

Good guys. No, because

34:00

both her and the guy who pulls up his tidy

34:02

whiteies are wearing white underwear which would tell me they're

34:04

good guys. But that's the thing. You

34:07

don't have to be white because Patrick Swayze is kind

34:09

of, you know, he's got a dark side. But

34:12

when we see Patrick Swayze when, when, um,

34:14

what's her name comes to bring him breakfast,

34:16

he, we see his bare butt and she

34:18

basically comes when she sees it. Oh god.

34:21

He like gets out of bed and you see his butt

34:23

and she's like, ugh, ugh, ugh,

34:25

ugh, ugh, like,

34:27

she like full blown comes and

34:30

then he's like, here's some coffee. And

34:33

he puts jeans on no underwear. You

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36:01

home I

36:07

Was very excited that the final fight scene

36:09

where Patrick Swayze has to fight like the

36:12

main bad guys henchmen He was

36:14

fighting a denim on top denim on bottom bad

36:16

guy. Yeah, which is denim shirt denim pants He

36:23

I wanted to show this is just a classic

36:25

a classic scene everyone knows heard

36:28

about the throat rip But

36:30

there's a little moment before that that's worthy of

36:33

showing. Here we go. Take a look. This is the

36:35

big final fight What

36:46

What little gun baby

36:48

gun She's

37:02

checking out already dead is the throat

37:04

out. Yeah, the throat's out. This guy's

37:06

gone. It's gone already dead

37:14

The key road in the water so they would bleed

37:16

out in the water It would make him down to

37:18

be a guy it would take him minutes to die.

37:20

She could have saved him She's

37:22

a doctor. I've been my own rip that character is

37:24

a doctor. I Do

37:27

like that this throat rip is his signature

37:29

move Earlier in the movie

37:31

somebody's like I heard he killed a guy he ripped his

37:33

throat out Well, you knew that was coming later when they set

37:35

that up in the first five minutes We

37:37

got to see the throat rip, but that's a

37:39

crazy brutal move and then he almost rips gazara's

37:41

throat out He stares at his hands Should

37:49

we oh we are the house looks so good We

37:52

can open up the that says some questions if you

37:54

guys have any questions about things that we haven't talked

37:56

about we We still have to talk about the grizzly

37:58

bear Well,

38:00

you should ask the baby first baby

38:02

question Questions here in

38:04

your hand if you have a question. I Wanted

38:08

to know if you could talk about the

38:10

irony of Patrick Swayze always

38:13

You know talking about how important is to be

38:15

nice to everybody and just you know He

38:17

says that many times movie and then just

38:19

beats the shit out of everybody Yeah, that's

38:21

true never doesn't get into a fight the

38:23

three rules that he has is always

38:26

be nice Yeah, and well, that's one of

38:28

the threats the most important one and he

38:31

is he's the most violent dude in the

38:33

entire town He

38:35

has like he's capable of like

38:37

Wolverine level blind rage Yeah

38:42

Where's that baby? We've got it. We've got

38:44

baby Wolverine lights are on I'm gonna find

38:46

you, baby Don't

38:49

you worry baby? I'm looking for you Come

38:52

coming for your baby wherever you are Where

38:54

is that baby? Where is this baby? Where

39:01

baby is on the aisle give me a baby going over

39:03

I see you baby very cute

39:05

baby Ben

39:10

gazera when you get older Do

39:12

they ever explain how he got the skills to beat

39:14

the shit out of everybody? There's

39:17

no backstory. He's never not been a

39:20

cooler. He seems to be Sam Elliott's

39:22

protege Right, but there's a moment there

39:24

was a moment though where he was

39:27

studying philosophy at NYU and

39:29

then became the most badass guy in the

39:31

world Yeah I have a kind of like

39:33

backstory that involves like he was in the

39:35

military or he was well He really just

39:37

Sam Elliott the thing we haven't talked about

39:40

is Sam Elliott comes in like three quarters

39:42

of the way through the movie and as

39:44

far as I'm concerned the true love story

39:46

in this movie is lazy and

39:48

Sam Elliott, yeah, they Hug

39:51

and caress each other to a

39:53

degree that is shocking By

39:56

the way, you know when Sam Elliott's about to

39:58

throw down because he pulls his hair back in

40:00

a crunchy. Yeah. Yeah.

40:04

Also, the most awkward scene is basically,

40:06

you know, so what Patrick

40:08

Swayze is kind of into this girl, they've

40:10

slept together, and then he introduces him to

40:13

Sam Elliott. And Sam Elliott kind of starts

40:15

trying to take her away from Patrick Swayze.

40:17

They have like a very sexy dance. And

40:19

it says something like, as she's walking

40:21

away, he says, a woman

40:24

shouldn't be that smart. No, no,

40:26

he says she's got too much brains to have

40:28

that good of an ass. Yes, but she's

40:30

wearing a very blousy, poofy

40:33

pleated skirt. There's no way he could

40:35

know that. She's wearing, she's a Dr. Saler.

40:37

She should get a much better outfit. And

40:40

she's been, by the way, she's been up all night and

40:42

is going in to start her shift. Yeah. Yeah.

40:46

She goes, I need to take a quick nap. I guess I

40:48

don't need on somebody who's about to perform surgery on me. Because

40:50

they've been raging all night with maniacs. All

40:53

right, what's your question? All right, what's the

40:55

better line? Polar bear fell on me or

40:57

pain don't hurt? Oh, this guy

41:00

is a fan. Or

41:03

he wrote the movie. I

41:05

will. I will have to play this

41:08

polar bear. I, my vote is the polar bear

41:10

because when else can you say a polar bear

41:12

fell on me? And by the way, it's also

41:14

an amazing button to a crazy scene. This

41:17

is the scene where do you have, what do you do? You have

41:19

the whole, I have, I just have the polar bear scene. But

41:23

you'll see what we're talking about. Dalton

41:25

is loose in the mansion and everybody's all

41:27

the bad guys are looking for him. And

41:29

here is what happened. This is the fattest,

41:32

dumbest one. I

41:34

hate this place. He

41:38

doesn't like scary

41:40

animals. I

41:46

feel like

41:48

my character would have tape on a couple of

41:50

his fingers. All right, cause maybe he got hurt

41:52

or something. Gazzara.

41:56

I may not have cued this up perfectly.

41:58

Here we go. I

42:01

think he did get his fingers smashed earlier.

42:08

I got it right here! Guys,

42:18

that is not the dumb Delaware you made

42:20

for each other. Patrick

42:22

Flayzer goes, you guys are made for

42:24

each other. Again, an insult

42:26

that doesn't really pay off. Does

42:30

anybody in fear make that noise? Has

42:35

anybody ever made that noise? Well

42:37

that's a crazy moment too because, okay,

42:39

so he says I hate this place,

42:41

acknowledging that there are a lot of

42:43

animals who are dead here and

42:45

stuffed. So in that moment

42:47

where he's shooting the polar bear, does he

42:50

genuinely thinks that polar bear is real? I'm

42:53

asking this genuinely you guys, this is not

42:55

a bit. Do you think he

42:57

thinks there's a polar bear coming

43:00

at me? I

43:02

do believe that because there is a polar bear coming

43:04

at me. Why couldn't he just do

43:06

this? That's what

43:08

I'm saying, why is he shooting him?

43:11

He has three options, stay completely still,

43:13

move to the right, move to the

43:15

left. He could have done either, but

43:18

still, and then fired. And

43:20

then there's a scene later on where he decides

43:22

to, because he does survive this, he's not killed

43:25

by the fake polar bear. Spoiler

43:27

alert. Huge spoiler alert. So

43:30

that he can have a spin off, we hope. Fingers

43:33

crossed. And then later on when he decides

43:35

to join the good guys, he looks

43:37

at the stuffed monkeys for a long time.

43:40

Well the stuffed monkeys are in the position

43:42

of see no evil, hear no evil. I

43:44

didn't realize that. I

43:46

didn't realize that. I'm off set. By

43:49

the way, the first time you see the

43:51

cops is after Ben Gazera is brutally murdered

43:53

in his own house. Probably

43:56

the only time not in public a person

43:58

is killed. It's

44:00

the end of the movie and Patrick Swayze,

44:03

Ben Gazara has Patrick Swayze dead to rights

44:06

with a gun. I can play it. Here

44:08

we go. It's over.

44:10

These are the

44:13

townsfolk whose business is he's

44:16

been ruining. Your guys still

44:18

stuck behind the pole. You'll

44:25

see him in a second. This

44:29

is our town and don't you

44:31

forget it. What?

44:41

So stuck. That was

44:44

it. And

44:50

then basically the cops come in. So then the cops come in

44:52

and say what happened here? And all the

44:54

townspeople are like, and it's intense right? Because I just murdered him

44:56

and called blood. And he says, I

44:58

didn't see anything. I didn't see anything. And

45:01

then trapped under polar bear goes, I

45:03

was trapped under a pale polar bear fell on me.

45:06

And everybody goes, ha ha ha ha. Everybody's

45:09

a dead man. They are murderers. They are

45:11

murderers. But did they call the cops? No.

45:16

Who called them? I don't know. But

45:20

this is also the first time the cops have shown

45:22

up to anything. And

45:25

they come in force. The sheriff of companies. The

45:27

fire department did show up when red auto shop

45:30

blew up. That was the only time you saw

45:32

any federal involvement in this town. Any

45:34

other questions? Yeah. Okay.

45:36

This question in here. So

45:40

one of the bouncers didn't look

45:42

like they were letting in underage pageends

45:44

in the bar. And wasn't that the

45:46

same guy that was like, cod, like, having sex?

45:48

That's the girl. He left in the girl with

45:51

a Sears card. He says, this is a Sears

45:53

card. And then he lets them in. And

45:56

then he plows her in the storage. Sure. Yeah. 18

46:00

she's only 16 years old. He is not wearing

46:03

a condom. Guys it doesn't matter when you're under

46:06

18 you can't get any diseases. That's true.

46:08

That's right. Because the female body has a

46:10

way of shutting that down. That's true. That

46:12

is true. I mean it's been getting a

46:15

lot of attention lately. Right guys? It's right

46:17

there yeah. That's what I've heard. Yeah it's

46:19

totally cool. It's totally cool. It's called a

46:21

digital mating. You can't get pregnant. Let's see

46:24

I'm gonna go around. Yeah what's

46:26

your question? If this movie was

46:28

remade today who would replace Patrick Swasey? Oh

46:30

good question. Such a good question. Ah man.

46:32

Guys let's all fucking think about this for

46:34

a second. Who could replace Patrick Swasey?

46:37

I don't have to think about it for very long.

46:39

Statham is pretty good but a little

46:42

on the nose. Liam Neeson would be

46:44

the Sam Elliott character. Liam Neeson yeah

46:46

you're right with Liam Sam Elliott. He

46:48

could play Patrick Swasey's dad Liam Neeson.

46:52

Back Efron. Back

46:55

Efron. Really? Shame

46:59

on you. Shame on you.

47:01

Back Efron. Oh

47:03

I got it. I got it. I got it.

47:05

I got it. Not a Michael Parks novel. I

47:08

got it. I got it. Channing Tatum. Channing Tatum

47:10

yeah. Channing Tatum. Channing Tatum.

47:12

Liam Neeson. Let's do this.

47:14

Guys. Holy shit

47:16

that's a fucking home run movie. I would

47:18

see that movie in a heartbeat. Remake that.

47:21

Joe Carnahan to direct it. And

47:23

then who would be Ben Gazera?

47:25

The Grey. And there's a wolf.

47:27

Just cuz. There's a question here.

47:30

Oh wait. Clint Eastwood should be

47:32

Ben Gazera. Oh.

47:34

It always comes to this time where obviously we

47:37

had an opinion about this movie that it's awesome

47:39

and other people also agree.

47:42

These are reviews that

47:45

were culled from Amazon. It's time for

47:47

a second opinion. These

47:49

are second opinions from

47:51

top to bottom. Crazy movies

47:54

are fun. These are

47:56

great reviews. Five star reviews on Amazon about

47:58

Roadhouse. Here it goes. This

48:00

is the greatest movie I own. It

48:03

has everything you could ever want. Fighting,

48:06

boozing, strippers, blowed up

48:08

buildings and a monster

48:10

truck. Plus,

48:13

there's a character who gets his throat

48:15

ripped out by a sweaty Patrick Swayze.

48:19

Five star. That

48:22

criteria is never matched in any other

48:24

movie. If those are the only things

48:26

that he wants, not that,

48:28

not looking up. This one is a great one.

48:31

It sneaks up on you like an STD.

48:34

And you... And

48:36

you don't know you have it until

48:38

you really have it. From

48:42

Swayze's peacock mullet to his greased

48:44

up body doing slow mo tongue-fu

48:46

moves. This movie is

48:48

art for artists. I...

48:57

Then these are just like little ones

48:59

that I liked in here too. Make

49:01

no mistake about it. This is about

49:04

violence, not dancing or

49:06

romance. Some

49:08

scenes are, all caps, very

49:12

sexy. Especially

49:15

in the back of the bar

49:17

when they're on break. He

49:21

spells break B-R-A-K-E.

49:26

If you know what I mean. Okay.

49:29

Sharp Marble writes,

49:32

a classic guys movie that has parts

49:35

for gals too. June,

49:38

did it have parts for gals? It had a few

49:40

parts for gals. I also thought

49:43

it was really weird that Patrick Swayze falls

49:45

in love with Kelly Lynch's character whose name

49:47

is Elizabeth but only calls her Doc for

49:49

the whole movie. Yeah, so he's like, listen,

49:51

Doc, you gotta get out of here. Like,

49:53

what? Did anyone else notice too,

49:55

when we're first introduced to her, she has on

49:58

glasses and her hair's like pulled back and... a

50:00

French braid. When she goes out on

50:02

her first date with Swayze, she styles

50:04

her hair in like Swayze bangs. Did

50:07

you notice that? And never wears her glasses ever again. And

50:09

they were amazing. I thought that was

50:12

her best look. Oh, absolutely. She's got to wear

50:14

those glasses to show everybody at work that she's

50:16

really smart. Super smart. Yeah. I believe that. I

50:18

mean, look at that. She works on an x-ray

50:20

machine that I've never seen before too, like an

50:23

automated x-ray. She's like, she's in there doing x-rays.

50:25

I don't know what she's looking at,

50:28

but she's looking at a ton of x-rays. A ton of

50:30

x-rays at once. Yeah. It's almost like a

50:32

rotating thing of x-rays. Oh,

50:34

I got to examine all these people's x-rays

50:36

all together. All

50:39

right. So I think we covered everything. This

50:41

is the Mount Everest of bad movies.

50:43

It's not a bad movie. It's a great

50:45

movie executed amazingly. Oh, this

50:48

movie, we do movies that I

50:50

would never recommend people watch, The

50:52

Last Airbender. And

50:55

this is one everybody should leave

50:57

currently and watch immediately. This goes

50:59

up in the pantheon of like

51:01

Fast Five, Crank 2, and

51:04

Roadhouse. They are the must-owns of the How

51:06

Did This Get Made collection. They

51:08

are amazing. So that brings us to the

51:11

end of our first live episode from

51:13

Bumbershoot. And Jason Mandzukas

51:15

is still not on Twitter, but I

51:17

am at Paul Scheer. June is at

51:20

June Diane Rayfield. Make

51:22

a comment. Put it on our iTunes page. We love it.

51:24

And continue to send us cool shit. We

51:27

got a bunch of neat fan art. We

51:29

appreciate it all. All right. See you next week.

51:31

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