Huge news: I'm now offering natal chart readings! You can book one HERE. Listen for more details, including how you can win a free reading, + a fascinating interview with data scientist Alex Boxer, author of A Scheme of Heaven: The History of A

Elixir ft. Zoe Wilkins

May 5th, 2020 24m 13s

More Taurus earthiness, immortality, Ashton Kutcher + Mila Kunis and their Quarantine Pinot Noir, and a discussion on wine with veteran sommelier Zoe Wilkins. ✑ EXPLORE THE DARK. Website / Instagram / Twitter Become an Inkblot Astrology contri

Moss ft. Blake

Apr 21st, 2020 28m 15s

Taurus season, societal shifts, Chris Crocker, We Are The Union, and a discussion on the recent rise of OnlyFans sex work with OnlyFans content creator Blake. ✑ EXPLORE THE DARK. Website / Instagram / Twitter Become an Inkblot Astrology contrib

Nemesis ft. Shahnaz Zarif

Apr 7th, 2020 28m 32s

Aries season, our personal and collective nemeses, Becky Lynch, Ratboys, and a discussion on the world of professional wrestling with wrestler, musician, and cohost of Grap Grrrlz podcast Shahnaz Zarif. ✑ EXPLORE THE DARK. Website / Instagram /

Quarantine

Mar 24th, 2020 11m 23s

All bets are off. Join me for some quarantine stress relief. ✑ EXPLORE THE DARK. Website / Instagram / Twitter Become an Inkblot Astrology contributions at Hooligan Magazine

Dew

Mar 10th, 2020 9m 43s

Saturn moving into Aquarius, a mini forecast, and Mulan. ✑ EXPLORE THE DARK. Website / Instagram / Twitter Become an Inkblot Astrology contributions at Hooligan Magazine

Delve ft. Helen Zaltzman

Feb 25th, 2020 27m 56s

Mercury Retrograde, Pisces season, a mini forecast, Kaina, and a discussion on the names of the planets with etymological investigation enthusiast Helen Zaltzman. ✑ EXPLORE THE DARK. Website / Instagram / Twitter Become an Inkblot Astrology co

Allure ft. Jenny Owen Youngs

Feb 11th, 2020 30m 21s

Valentine's Day, Cupid, J. Lo + Shakira's halftime show, the Grammy's, the Iowa Caucus, the Impeachment Trial, and a sign compatibility segment with Jenny Owen Youngs. ✑ EXPLORE THE DARK. Website / Instagram / Twitter Become an Inkblot Read Jes

Altruist ft. Ryan O'Donnell

Jan 28th, 2020 23m 18s

Uranus, the 2020 U.S. Primary election, Aquarius season, Slow Pulp, and an interview with Democratic strategist Ryan O'Donnell. Click here for the 2020 Primary election dates by state. ✑ EXPLORE THE DARK. Website / Instagram / Twitter Become an

Catalyst ft. @notallgeminis

Jan 14th, 2020 22m 24s

Mars, the New Year, astrology memes, Adam Sandler, Capricorn season, Big Thief, and an interview with Courtney Perkins of @notallgeminis. ✑ EXPLORE THE DARK. Website / Instagram / Twitter Become an Inkblot Read Jess' astrology contributions at

Astrology Apps

Dec 31st, 2019 1h 3m

Happy New Year! This week we bid Chris adieu in his final episode, discuss Astrology Apps: which to take into the New Year and which to leave in dusty 2019, plus an Astro Probe with music journalist Dan Ozzi. Stay tuned for an all new show in 2

Harry Potter Houses w/ Hrishi Hirway

Dec 24th, 2019 59m 57s

HAPPY HOLIDAYS! This week we celebrate with a special episode on the Harry Potter Houses. We sort the 4 elements, 12 signs, and ourselves, with guest host Hrishikesh Hirway of podcasts Song Exploder + West Wing Weekly and musical projects The O

The Aspects ft. Shamir

Dec 17th, 2019 53m 20s

This week we bore Chris with the Aspects, wind down the educational content of the pod, talk wrestling, money spending, Chris vows to stop talking about s*x, plus an Astro Probe with musician Shamir. This week's advice: 1. What advice would yo

The Nodes ft. Tommy Siegel

Dec 10th, 2019 47m 12s

This week we talk about the Lunar Nodes, the ecliptic, the Russian whale jail, several ninja turtles, + more, plus an Astro Probe with musician and cartoonist Tommy Siegel of bands Jukebox the Ghost and Narc Twain. This week's advice: 1. A lot

The Houses ft. Macseal

Dec 3rd, 2019 54m 47s

This week we talk about the 12 houses, Howard Sasportas, why the 13th sign is fake news, a barfing dog, dunk tanks, + more, plus an Astro Probe with Frankie of NY based band Macseal. This week's advice: 1. My crush shot me down and it hurts be

Thanksgiving at Hooters w/ Chris' Wife

Nov 26th, 2019 50m 39s

HaPpY ThAnKsGiViNg!!! In this ep we all go to Hooters for Friendsgiving with Chris' beautiful wife Cassie Farren, where we examine Chris and Cassie's charts using what we've learned so far. This week's advice: 1. How can I remedy my blunt Capr

Pluto ft. bbweems

Nov 19th, 2019 50m 25s

This week we discuss Pluto and why it's no longer a planet, Disney freaks, A Goofy Movie, RIP Walter Mercado, the first bands Chris and Jess were in, that Calvin Klein lesbian poster, + more, featuring an Astro Probe with bbweems, the new solo

Neptune ft. Kevin Devine

Nov 12th, 2019 52m 37s

This week we discuss Neptune, the current Mercury Retrograde, the unfortunate way in which bears hibernate, Chris' new 55" tv, + more, featuring an Astro Probe with Kevin Devine. This week's advice: 1. How can I make my partner more comfortabl

Live from Red Lobster

Nov 5th, 2019 47m 16s

Your astro hosts enjoy a candle lit dinner at the local Red Lobster. We review the 12 signs, compare them to Red Lobster menu items, and catch up w Chris on where he's at w astrology. This week's advice: 1. What are your craziest schemes on ho

The Scream Trilogy ft. Mike Kinsella

Oct 29th, 2019 57m 27s

ITS A HALLOWEEN EP. We watched all 3 Screams and talked about the characters as sign/planet archetypes, our Halloween costumes, Pixar depression, 90s lesbian fashion, Mojo Jojo, astrology apps, + more, featuring an Astro Probe with Mike Kinsell

Uranus ft. Bittersweet Media

Oct 22nd, 2019 52m 19s

In our sweet 16 ep we review Saturn, discuss the outer planets, get deep inside Uranus, Dwayne "the Rock" Johnson, The Parent Trap, Jeff Foxworthy, Ben Franklin, the Purge, + more, featuring an Astro Probe with Jaclyn O'Connell of Philly-based

Saturn ft. Into It. Over It.

Oct 15th, 2019 51m 2s

This week we talk about Saturn, Amanda Bynes' vagina, the college admissions scandal, Beauty & the Beast, 50 Shades of Chris, + more, featuring an Astro Probe with Evan Weiss of Chicago-based band Into It. Over It. This week's advice: 1. How d

The Elements ft. Hrishikesh Hirway

Oct 8th, 2019 53m 8s

CHRIS IS HOME FROM TOUR. This week we talk about the four Elements, pool jet orgasms, Rain-X, Jessica Rabbit, Chris' hypothetical murder podcast, + more, featuring an Astro Probe with Hrishikesh Hirway of podcasts Song Exploder + West Wing Week

Advice Marathon

Oct 1st, 2019 28m 35s

Another advice marathon 4 u. Regular episodes return NEXT WEEK. This week's advice: 1. I was born early, does this impact my sun sign? 2. I'm frustrated with my own emotions, how can I nurture my moon? 3. My bf just moved away, how can I make

Girls Night ft. Leah Wellbaum of Slothrust

Sep 24th, 2019 49m 57s

Chris is still away on tour so Jess and Producer Jenny have a slumber party-style Girls Night, complete with face masks/pajamas/snacks, astrology review, gossip about hot people, + Jenny's List, featuring an Astro Probe with Leah Wellbaum of LA