Perhaps you're already familiar with what social psychologists have had to say about the fundamental attribution error, but did you know that it has a secret role in magnifying your anxieties about your worth? If you're prone to worrying about

#84: The underappreciated value of waiting for success

27 days ago 20m 6s

Where did we all get this idea that if we want to succeed, we need to go faster? And that if we haven't succeeded yet, that must mean that we're probably not good enough? Sometimes, the reason we haven't succeeded isn't that we're not good enou

#83: How to be happy

Apr 5th, 2024 23m 25s

No, not like that. I'm not talking about how to achieve the ultimate happiness, eudaimonia, or enlightenment. I'm simply talking about how to enjoy your down-time without feeling like you're doing it wrong. If you've ever looked forward to a we

#82: Stop policing yourself

Mar 22nd, 2024 19m 45s

How well do you know yourself? Are there feelings that you have, or things that you care about, that you're in complete denial about? Trust me, there probably are - you just haven't noticed. And it's a problem, because until you can acknowledge

#81: Are you trying to live a final draft life?

Mar 8th, 2024 19m 1s

Are you hesitant to make certain changes in your life, like changing careers or ending a relationship, because you don't want the time and energy you've invested in your life so far to be wasted? If so, you're not alone - but you're wrong. Reco

#80: What are you so afraid of?

Feb 23rd, 2024 16m 3s

When you're procrastinating, reluctant to knuckle down and get on with your work, taking way too long to do what ought to be a straightforward task, do you respond with self-compassion and non-judgmental curiosity as you try to work out what th

#79: My imperfect but adequate working day

Feb 9th, 2024 28m 3s

I keep getting asked what my working day looks like. You know, as if I've cracked this whole productivity thing. I definitely haven't, but I have managed to make positive changes over the past few years as a result of making the sorts of change

#78: Fix your self-compassion with the metaphysics of personal identity (and an Aeropress)

Jan 26th, 2024 24m 53s

Your problem with self-compassion: the one that leads you to be kind and supportive to other people, but nasty and vindictive to yourself. One reason you struggle with the 'self' part of 'self-compassion' is that you view yourself as separate f

#77: Mediocrity is underrated!

Jan 12th, 2024 16m 40s

Here we are, a third of the way through January. Have you slipped up on your new year resolutions yet? Will you be kind to yourself if you do? Or will you tell yourself that you're a failure, you can't do anything right, you should just do ever

#76: This is what positive change feels like

Dec 8th, 2023 23m 22s

Are you a sucker for self-improvement advice that offers to overhaul your life for the better overnight, even though you know that (unfortunately) it's not that simple? Yeah, same. There's a reason you're attracted to advice like that, and ther

#75: Your progress tunnel vision

Nov 24th, 2023 18m 39s

Yeah, I know you're diligently working towards that big goal, and that you STILL haven't got there yet. But are you stopping to reflect on your progress along the way, and to celebrate small wins? If the answer is no, then you're sabotaging you

#74: When taking on more can energise you

Nov 10th, 2023 16m 47s

I know. Your life needs an overhaul, but where are you supposed to find the energy to fix it? You're struggling to keep your head above water as it is. The thing is, friend, not all demands on you are equal. The demands that are imposed on you

#73: How to practise being instead of doing

Oct 27th, 2023 18m

Look at you there, always striving, always becoming, always hustling. When do you ever get to pause and just ... be? Do you even know how? Plenty of us don't. We had no problem just chilling and enjoying the moment when we were kids, but somewh

#72: Bend so you don't break: a stress survival guide

Oct 13th, 2023 18m 33s

Just as trees aren't meant to remain stiff and unyielding in the face of a storm, you aren't meant to remain efficient and relaxed in the face of mounting demands. Bending isn't a weakness; it's what you need to do to survive. But it's only you

#71: The best time to write is the worst time to write

Sep 29th, 2023 20m 34s

Do you tell yourself that if only you had a day of uninterrupted time ahead of you (and, of course, the right stationery), you'd finally be able to get some writing done - only to procrastinate your precious writing time away when you do finall

#70: How to write

Sep 15th, 2023 29m

Writing is why we all do what we do - or at least, a big part of it. But it's also a source of intense anxiety, whether we're new to it or whether we've been at it for years. So, here's another start-of-the-new-academic-year imperfectionist spe

#69: How to read

Sep 1st, 2023 28m 33s

Do you ever try to read philosophy (or some other stodgy not-designed-for-entertainment text) and find yourself struggling to understand ... well, any of it? Do you finish reading a paragraph and find that you have absolutely no idea what it wa

#68: Plato (and Barbie) on perfection

Aug 18th, 2023 18m 27s

If you won't accept anything less than perfection from yourself, I have some disappointing news from Ancient Greece. Back in the 4th (ish) century BC, Plato was telling anyone who would listen that perfection doesn't even exist in the material

#67: You owe your success to your flaws

Aug 4th, 2023 18m 13s

I get it: you want to be less of a perfectionist, more confident and assertive, less of a procrastinator, and all the rest of it. These, after all, are things that hold us back - or so we often think. As it happens, though, things are more comp

#66: The only productivity hack you need

Jul 21st, 2023 21m 29s

We all love a bit of productivity porn. What could be wrong with learning about how to get better at getting things done? Well, quite a few things, as it happens. Seeking out the latest productivity tools and techniques can be a way to mask the

#65: Reflections on a recent failure

Jul 7th, 2023 19m 29s

We all hate failure. We're terrified of it. And so, when I chalked up a big fat failure a few days ago, I knew immediately that I needed to dissect it for you lot. The key lesson here? Our unwillingness to look failure square in the face is hol

#64: Reject work/life balance!

Jun 23rd, 2023 17m 24s

We're constantly encouraged to strive for work/life balance. But it's a horrible, victim-blaming, damaging metaphor, and it tricks us into thinking we should take on more than we're able to cope with. And, besides, who wants to spend their enti

#63: In defence of your comfort zone

Jun 9th, 2023 17m 9s

You know that remaining in your comfort zone is basically a psychic crime, right? Like, only losers do that. Successful people are out there pushing boundaries and loving life. Bummer that, by definition, they have to spend their entire time in

#62: Guilt! Guilt! Guilt!

May 26th, 2023 16m 26s

Whatever it is that you're doing and however it is that you're doing it, you're telling yourself that you're doing it wrong and anyway you ought to be doing something else instead. Right? You feel guilty even when you know you're doing the righ

#61: Your productivity standards are like a 1980s fad diet

May 12th, 2023 20m 58s

You know better than to vow, after chomping your way through your fifth slice of chocolate cake, that starting tomorrow you're only ever going to eat salad and you're going to run 10 miles before breakfast every single day, forever. After all,