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Here's another show we know you'll love.

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I got this really strange email last

0:32

night. I need to see what's

0:34

going on with this mystery file. Hey,

0:36

it's a map of a town called Ocean

0:39

Bay. Someone sent these

0:41

images to you for a reason. I'm

0:44

so lost right now. When

0:46

was the last time you chose a direction and

0:49

followed it? I'm going

0:51

to Ocean Bay. We

0:55

don't get many tourists this time of year. Ocean

0:58

Bay is a friendly town, but we're not

1:00

that friendly. I never sent

1:02

you an email. I don't even know

1:04

you. And why exactly

1:06

are you here? The map

1:08

is the reason we're here. Maps

1:11

help when you're lost. Do

1:13

you know what a trap street is? Trap

1:16

streets aren't real. They don't exist.

1:19

Don't trust anyone unless they give you a

1:21

reason to trust them. I

1:23

think he's dead. How could so

1:26

much damage happen to a human body in such a

1:28

short period of time? What the hell

1:30

is going on here? From

1:32

the creators of Strange Air, this

1:35

is Trap Street. So maps can

1:37

have secrets. Yes,

1:40

maps can have secrets. Follow

1:43

and hear new episodes of Trap Street

1:45

anywhere you listen to podcasts. The

1:50

Crit Show contains elements of horror, fantasy

1:53

violence, and adult language. Parent

1:55

warnings can be found in the episode description. I

2:15

got an email the other day

2:18

from Google to my Gmail that

2:20

said the email

2:23

address [email protected]

2:26

is going to be shut down if you

2:29

don't log into it by this particular date.

2:31

This is the recovery email for Questlife Adventures

2:33

so you're being notified. And I was like,

2:35

what the fuck is Questlife Adventures? So

2:39

I Google it and I

2:42

found something called a website called

2:44

Questlife. Questlife Trial of

2:46

the Sword, which sounds fucking radical. Does

2:48

anybody want to take a guess at

2:50

what Questlife Trial of the Sword is?

2:53

Uh, it's a mercenary site where you

2:55

hire real assassins. Is

2:59

it like a larp? One

3:01

more? I was going to go the opposite

3:03

way. Is it like things to make your

3:05

daily chores seem like exciting? Oh yeah. Kind

3:07

of like level up your life. I

3:09

wish all of that were true. I wish

3:11

any of those were true. It's a Jesus thing. That

3:16

was my second guess. It's like for people

3:18

who are like, I don't remember what

3:20

the blurb was, but it's like, every man

3:22

knows that within him is the potential

3:24

for greatness or something like that. And

3:26

it's like a realizing your potential through

3:29

God type thing, which clearly I didn't

3:31

make. Sure. Inside

3:35

every man there are two swords. Go

3:39

to the hospital. So

3:42

I opened a new Gmail tab and I typed

3:44

in that email address and I just typed in

3:47

like, for a long time I just had a

3:49

password that I used for everything. I don't do

3:51

that anymore. Almost nothing uses that old password anymore.

3:53

Sure. But I typed that one in and I

3:55

got into the email account and I was like,

3:58

okay, this is mine. What is that? And

4:00

I immediately went to sent emails. There are

4:03

no sent emails, so I never used it

4:05

to like communicate out I

4:07

have some emails in from

4:09

Google and from Weebly

4:11

like the website maker website and

4:13

I was like what why we

4:15

believe so I follow one of

4:17

those Links in the inbox to

4:19

weebly and it's like well you gotta like you

4:21

you got to set up a square account because

4:24

that's how Weebly works now their login integration is

4:26

a square, so look okay, fuck it, so I

4:28

set up a square account I get into a

4:30

website I get into a

4:32

website that is like questlifeadventures.com

4:34

and I'm like what the

4:37

fuck is this and

4:39

there's it's not published. There's nothing on it There's

4:41

a home page That's a picture of like a

4:43

like a hiker with a backpack standing on top

4:45

of a mountain It says like welcome to the

4:48

quest life Something like three bullet

4:50

points about like what this is gonna accomplish and

4:52

you click the enter site button and it just

4:54

says there will Be stuff here, and I was

4:56

like okay Well that was I definitely made that

5:02

And I'm like this had to have been a school

5:04

project This had to have been something

5:06

I had to do for school that I didn't care

5:09

about and I've completely 100%

5:12

purged from my brain But looking at the

5:14

header image on this website on mine quest

5:16

life adventures It's the guy on the mountain

5:18

with the backpack in front of the Sun

5:20

and I go back to quest life trial

5:22

for the sword And it's an almost identical

5:24

image and mine says welcome to the quest

5:26

life and there says welcome to the quest

5:28

life And I was like I got my

5:30

fucking shit copped by this random Christian

5:33

association of self inspiration and I looked I

5:35

did like the web look up and I

5:38

was like okay I know I registered mine

5:40

in 2014. I've got the emails when they do theirs

5:42

2017. I fucking got them They

5:46

stole my shit. They ripped me off and

5:48

so anyway There's an active appending lawsuit, and

5:50

I've been urged by my lawyers not to

5:52

talk about it Well

5:57

that leads me into I was really

6:00

hoping you weren't going to find this until it was

6:02

completed, but you're on to me. So

6:04

we'll take this to court, man. I

6:09

love that they must have thought of the

6:11

name, found your website, and they were like,

6:13

oh, somebody else already has it. But look

6:15

at it, though. But

6:18

that image and that font size and

6:20

the subheading, let's just do all of

6:22

that. And look at how incomplete

6:24

and clearly forgotten it is. This will never

6:27

catch up to us. You

6:29

were wrong. When you were describing that

6:31

photo, I was 100% waiting

6:33

for you to come to the revelation that

6:35

it was a photo of Adam, because that sounds

6:38

like a poem that he would be found

6:40

in. It might

6:42

be. He's got his back to the camera,

6:44

so there's no way of knowing. Or possibly

6:46

TJ if he got lost. If that's true.

6:48

Yeah, I don't think the posture was sufficiently

6:50

bewildered. Oh, OK. Well,

6:53

listen, it's that time of the year

6:55

already. It's time for our

6:57

Crit Show Creations contest because we are

7:00

coming up on our six year anniversary.

7:02

This is my favorite contest that we

7:04

do. Same. Yeah.

7:07

So if you are or new or have not

7:09

taken part, the Crit Show Creations contest is literally

7:12

just an opportunity for you to show off whatever

7:14

skill set you've got, whether

7:16

you like to throw pots or

7:18

paint paintings or throw pots as

7:20

in like crafting them or throw

7:23

pots as like a link from the Legend of Zelda. We

7:28

just want to see your skill set and

7:31

we want to see how you relate

7:33

it to the show or any show

7:35

that we have made anything, any of

7:37

the content we have done. Whatever

7:39

is under the Crit Show umbrella. Yeah, exactly.

7:41

So you can. Including

7:43

Quest Life Adventures. If

7:48

you can complete that site. I

7:52

imagine that that must be the website

7:54

that Jake had set up to get

7:56

emails about like crimes going on around

7:58

the internet. So

8:04

whatever you make I know that some folks

8:06

like to physically send it to us you

8:09

can go to our website and get our

8:11

mailing address there and physically send it to

8:13

us or you can send us a photo

8:15

of it at thecastathecritshowpodcast.com or you can tag

8:18

us on Twitter at the Crit Show and

8:21

hit it with the hashtag critshowcreations and

8:23

the deadline for this is gonna be

8:25

Friday May the 24th. It's

8:28

my birthday! Give me

8:30

a good birthday present! Yeah like

8:33

I said this has been my favorite thing

8:35

that we've done over the years because we

8:37

get such different and super cool stuff. Yeah

8:39

we've had like things that have

8:41

been knitted or somebody made like

8:44

chocolates and somebody wrote

8:46

a TTRPG and somebody wrote a

8:48

script and somebody wrote a

8:50

script for a podcast that and I

8:52

actually guess I haven't talked about this

8:54

on this intro that's being turned into

8:56

an audio drama. In fact we're having

8:58

auditions for it right now if anyone

9:01

listening is interested. Yeah someone wrote a

9:03

podcast episode about

9:05

Anastasia and Lana back

9:07

in the 90s about like oh what was

9:10

it like when what was their story when they

9:12

met and I liked it so much and I

9:14

talked to the two writers and we are actually

9:16

turning it into a 10 episode audio drama that

9:18

we are casting right now. That's

9:20

the Crit Show podcast.com/auditions if you want

9:22

to look at the characters we're looking

9:24

for. Anyway yeah so a ton of

9:26

super cool stuff we hope that you

9:29

take part in it. Send us your

9:31

crafts. Show us your creativeness. What's everybody's

9:33

hope? What's everybody's desired product this year?

9:35

I don't think we've had like a

9:37

locally microbrewed soda or beer made for us

9:39

yet. I think one of those would be

9:41

cool. You lost me at microbrewed. You regained

9:43

me at soda. Lost me a beer. I

9:45

won't consume

9:47

it but I'm I want to

9:50

see it. I really hope we

9:52

don't get any homemade dice. I

9:54

think you get the impression that

9:56

the saloon is a honeypot but

9:58

that is based. trying to get

10:01

somebody to approach it because it will look

10:03

like the inhabited structure. Realizing this, I

10:05

want to try and reach out

10:08

telepathically and warn my friends. As

10:10

you are maintaining this mental chat

10:12

line, getting this information out to

10:15

your squad, I think you notice

10:17

the sound of a mechanical ch-ch-ch-ch-ch-ch-ch-ch-ch,

10:19

oop! until you look up and see a

10:22

large net flying at you from

10:24

one of the buildings on the

10:26

edge of town. My initial reaction

10:28

would be to like, put my

10:30

hands up to try and block

10:32

in between me and this net,

10:34

but because I'm using my mind to

10:36

speak to everyone, I think I do

10:38

the same thing but mentally. So I

10:41

want to go weird and try to

10:44

telekinesis this net

10:46

to stop before it hits me. I

10:48

want to channel some magic at the

10:50

net that Megan has suspended some force

10:52

magic to try to push it away.

10:54

As you are pouring over the second

10:57

body that you dropped, you know, looking

10:59

for clues, trying to figure out if

11:01

there's anything weird about these figures, out

11:03

of the corner of your eye, you

11:05

see a little bit of movement and

11:07

you look over as the first body

11:09

sits back up with this fresh bullet

11:11

hole right through its head that you

11:13

know you just made and blinks over

11:15

those empty sockets and turns to

11:17

face you. Yes,

11:20

you are in the dust storm, face

11:22

to face with what sure seemed like

11:25

a corpse a moment ago that is

11:27

now sitting up and staring at you

11:29

with its mostly empty eye sockets. Oh,

11:32

that was a headshot! Are you supposed to shoot him

11:34

in the hell? God, what do I do with you?

11:37

I'm just gonna fan the hammer. Give

11:40

me a shoot roll. This is certainly

11:42

going to be opposed. Yeah. Take

11:45

a minus one. Okay. 11. You

11:48

just pump a bunch of rounds into

11:51

this thing, center mass, and it reels

11:53

with each one and it is trying

11:55

to reach out and get hands on

11:57

you. But stop it, stop it, stop

11:59

it! Bullet after bullet just

12:01

knocks it back more and more.

12:04

And it again falls seemingly

12:06

lifeless on its back in the dirt.

12:08

Well, I'm not relying on that. And

12:10

I get back up and work my

12:12

way through this dust storm towards where

12:14

I knew Megan was. Megan,

12:17

you hear shots from the general vicinity

12:19

that you knew tasks to be in

12:21

moments ago. And then you see

12:23

a silhouette headed your direction through the dust. I'll

12:26

grab my bow and arrow and knock one

12:28

of the arrows and just hold it and

12:30

wait until this big year becomes clear. I'm

12:32

reloading as I make my way through. And

12:35

if I see a silhouette, I'm just

12:37

I'm already shouting avocado, avocado. I'm

12:41

already shooting at it. Yeah,

12:44

you each see the

12:46

other resolve as

12:49

you get close enough in the dust storm to actually

12:51

make out details. I'll ride my horse up to

12:53

task and reach an arm out to

12:55

help him up on the back. Yep, I hop up.

12:57

Oh, I'm so glad you're okay. Same.

13:00

Where are the other three? I don't know. Kim

13:02

grabbed Red. He got caught in the net

13:04

that was going to hit me and her

13:07

and Jumbo dragged him off. I think that

13:09

direction. I don't know. I can't

13:11

tell about this fucking sand. Yeah, there's a bunch

13:13

of them out here, too. I heard a lot of footsteps.

13:16

Okay, she headed off towards a building

13:18

or around the corner of a building. So let's just

13:21

kind of move through here and try and find something

13:23

and maybe track them down. All

13:25

right, I'll watch her six and I'm just leveling

13:27

my guns off to both sides, just

13:30

trying to peer through the dust

13:32

storm for anyone coming up. I'll

13:35

just focus on leading my horse through

13:37

the storm. Okay, Tasu say you're watching

13:39

the six. Are you sitting backwards in the saddle, like

13:41

back to back? Well, now I am. Yeah. Okay.

13:45

Do a little spin move. All right. You

13:47

start to make your way further into

13:49

town and into the storm. Meanwhile, in

13:51

a dead end alley, Kim and Rev

13:53

and Jumbo, you are all

13:55

sitting on horseback. Rev's still pretty

13:57

much entangled here, but currently still.

14:00

safe. The dust storm is buffeting you

14:02

but you actually have some protection from

14:04

the buildings on either side and the

14:06

fence behind. So it can really only

14:08

get into you from one direction so

14:10

it's not quite as overwhelming in here.

14:12

What are you all doing? That's

14:14

good because I need to see. I'm

14:16

going to spend an equipment charge to pull

14:18

out a large hunting knife. Rev, I beg

14:20

you not to struggle. And I'm going to

14:22

try to free Rev and

14:25

his horse from this net. I don't think

14:27

that one will require any roll you

14:29

are currently kind of isolated from what's

14:31

going on. So it just takes a

14:34

moment for you to sever this net

14:36

and it falls loose on the ground

14:38

at Bojack's feet. Oh my god. Are

14:40

you okay? Yeah, I've just... whoa! That

14:43

was weird. I'm not good on a

14:45

horse let alone like tied to a

14:47

horse. What you were trying to do was

14:49

really cool. Thanks. Yeah. Where

14:52

did everyone else go? I am

14:54

not sure actually. I like looking

14:57

out the alley. Was it like that before?

14:59

Like that's really dusty. Yeah. I

15:02

imagine it's like we're peeking over

15:04

the ledge and it's like Rev's

15:06

head and then Bojack and then

15:09

mine and then Virgil and then

15:11

Jumbo. Yeah,

15:13

as you are discussing the conditions

15:15

outside of your alley, you can

15:17

see figures, silhouettes moving

15:19

around, not aimlessly. They clearly have

15:21

a purpose but they're kind of

15:24

crossing back and forth getting closer

15:26

and further like they are trying

15:28

to triangulate your position. Do we

15:30

call out? I'm gonna think

15:32

very loudly. Megan are you still there?

15:35

Hmm, I don't know if

15:37

that's still active. Megan what do you think? Do

15:39

you think that you've still got the mental chat

15:41

room up and running or do you think that would have fallen

15:43

away at any point? I would normally

15:45

say it's still up but I think since

15:47

I'm continuing this dust storm kind of in

15:50

the back of my mind, I only have

15:52

so many backburners. Yeah. You know what I

15:54

mean? I feel like that's probably what

15:56

is taking up the majority of my facilities

15:58

there. Okay. I don't hear

16:01

anything. can to hear anything it like

16:03

in my head yeah. Other than the

16:05

song, I can't get out of there. but now. Pay.

16:07

Like how do you call Megan or to see

16:10

only call you. Know we can usually

16:12

call her. It's just the kind of

16:14

like thinking the like. Directing.

16:16

It out. A do that to

16:18

it says is indistinguishable. To

16:21

the outside I from what I just did

16:23

before but I tried. Yeah, I don't think

16:25

you get any signal, I don't know, but

16:27

there are people. There are people out there

16:29

and they're trying to find us. but hopefully

16:31

Tas and Meghan art some of those people.

16:33

Boy yeah, I'm just gonna call out

16:35

from our position in the alley may.

16:38

Pass I'm gonna drop for the ground

16:40

and and put my hands on the

16:43

ground just waiting to see who comes

16:45

into the alley. Say ah yeah, You

16:47

see a few of those silhouettes, kind

16:49

of stop and it seems like they

16:51

turn in your direction and start moving

16:53

your way. Oh shit oh shit.

16:55

And as they get closer you see

16:57

the forms resolved through the dust. You

17:00

can make out the details. They're not

17:02

pass. Imagine it. it. Disable

17:04

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17:19

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Plus. Sign up today at

18:16

fableandfolly.com. I

18:20

want to channel some magic and do to them

18:22

what I did to the guy on the train.

18:24

Just blow him up into the air. Alright, on

18:27

the train that was Weird Level 3. That

18:29

was Single Target. Which,

18:31

you know, Weird Level 3 is a creature your own size. 4

18:34

is a creature double your size. 5 is a creature

18:37

the size of a horse. I think we can stick

18:39

with 4, even though there's 3 of these

18:41

individuals. I think we can... Yeah. We'll put you in the

18:43

middle. Less than a horse between the 3 of them.

18:45

Yeah. So yeah, go ahead and go Weird at Level 4. Okay.

18:48

7. Alright. You

18:50

blast some force up out

18:52

of the ground and rocket

18:54

these 3 individuals skyward.

18:57

They yelp and scream.

18:59

2 of them come down. One

19:01

on the roof on either side of this alley. And

19:04

hit and just slide back down

19:06

onto the ground. The

19:08

third one just comes back down in the

19:11

dirt right where he was standing. And he

19:13

lets out a big oof. But then he

19:15

starts yelling. We got 3! We got 3

19:17

over here in the alley! And you hear

19:20

various shouts across the

19:22

road as people are trying to coordinate

19:24

and head in your direction. Can I

19:26

hear that hollering? Why don't you

19:29

give me just an awareness roll? Okay.

19:33

Yeah, it is faint, but you are

19:35

able to make out the call and

19:37

the direction from which it's coming. Do

19:39

I feel like the faintness of it

19:41

is because of the dust storm or

19:43

because of like, are there buildings between

19:45

us? Because of the

19:47

dust storm. You two are more or

19:50

less on the road right at like the

19:52

edge of, I would say the edge of town. Like

19:54

the edge of this main thoroughfare of buildings. So

19:56

it doesn't sound like there are structures between you. It sounds like they are...

20:00

slightly down the road from you, they're just muffled

20:02

by all of the noise and the material

20:04

in the air. Well, hell, if I have a

20:06

direction, I'd like to take a shot. Oh, okay.

20:08

Give me a shoot roll. I mean, even

20:10

though you can hear a direction, this is still

20:13

a blind shot. Yeah. It's gotta be negative

20:15

something, and I'm inclined to make it more than

20:17

negative one. Like, I'm leaning

20:19

towards a minus two on this. I

20:21

mean, I disagree because I like tire

20:23

numbers. That's

20:26

all I have, though, to combat that.

20:28

Okay, I'm gonna go with, yeah, with a

20:30

minus two then. Okay? You're

20:32

opposed by the dust itself. Minus

20:34

two? Yeah. Ten. Oh my god.

20:36

Get out of here! No, please

20:38

stay. Please stay. Nine

20:40

plus three minus two. All right.

20:43

Rev and Kim and Jumbo, you

20:45

all see this figure who's shouting,

20:48

blowing up your whole spot right now,

20:51

and then just gets struck by a

20:53

bullet and falls to the ground. Okay,

20:56

that was definitely Taz. Yeah. What

20:58

do you want to do? Uh, boy. Start.

21:01

Never thought I would say this phrase.

21:03

Writing in the direction that that gunshot

21:05

came from. Yeah, I follow. Okay, you

21:07

all ride out of this alley onto

21:09

the main street into the ferocity of

21:11

the dust storm proper. Taz,

21:13

it's me, avocado. I hear

21:16

ya. Yeah, I think you all

21:18

reconvene in the street near the

21:20

end of town that Meghan was

21:22

approaching from, but all around

21:24

you still are the silhouettes and

21:26

sounds of people trying to find

21:29

you. And amidst all of this,

21:31

you still don't know what's going

21:33

on with whoever's in danger here.

21:35

Uh, I want to try to reach out

21:37

telepathically to everyone so I don't have to

21:40

shout out loud and the people in the

21:42

storm wouldn't hear me to come up

21:44

with a plan. Okay, go ahead and go

21:46

weird at level four again to re-establish the mental

21:48

link. Ten. Okay, you

21:50

open up the link. Are you all

21:52

okay? Yeah. Yeah, we're okay. All

21:54

right, let's get to the saloon. I

21:57

need to run into the trampus, but maybe it's this way

21:59

to pay attention. out a way through this we can

22:01

get there and get some answers. As we start

22:03

to head that way I want to use

22:05

one of my gear charges. Okay. I want

22:07

to pull out a string of firecrackers. Nice.

22:09

And light them and throw them the opposite

22:12

direction so it sounds like there's gunshots coming

22:14

from where we are not going. Nice.

22:16

Smart. Really smart. Use a dirty trick.

22:18

Wrong game. That's good.

22:21

I think I'll have you roll a bluff deceive

22:23

with a plus one. Ten.

22:25

All right. You light these firecrackers and

22:27

check them in the wrong direction and

22:29

they start popping off and you immediately

22:31

hear all that communication between

22:33

these silhouettes start driving all of them

22:36

in that direction. You can see them

22:38

passing you by in the dust heading

22:40

behind you towards the little explosions. As

22:43

we're riding to the saloon and

22:45

it comes into view can I try to

22:47

get a vision of the past?

22:50

You sure can. As always you've got

22:52

kind of three options for these visions.

22:55

They can be short but vague. They

22:57

can be short not vague or they

22:59

can be short and detailed. I'm

23:01

gonna say short but not vague. Okay so

23:03

that will be weird level five. Great. Again

23:06

my dice have not rolled anything

23:08

other than a six all day today but luckily

23:10

that's still an eight. Okay.

23:13

You get a vision and it

23:15

is again in the first person.

23:17

You are seeing through somebody's eyes

23:19

and they seem to be slipping

23:21

in and out of consciousness as

23:23

this vision goes on. You see

23:25

yourself tied up and across the

23:27

back of a horse being taken

23:30

somewhere by its rider and then

23:32

you're out of consciousness and then

23:34

you come back too and you

23:36

are being dragged somewhere and then

23:38

you slip out and you come

23:40

back too and you are sitting

23:42

inside of a saloon that you

23:44

don't recognize and there are figures

23:47

talking nearby and you look around

23:49

you and you can see to

23:51

your left another figure who is

23:53

dressed in the garb of the

23:56

iron striders who also appears to

23:58

be captured and in rough

24:00

shape. And you hear these figures talking

24:02

about holding the two of you for ransom, and

24:04

that they don't know if the

24:06

Iron Striders will come and they don't know if the

24:09

Iron Striders will pay, but if not, you'll at least

24:11

make good Eden. And then you come out of the

24:13

vision. Great. I will talk in the

24:15

mental change room. Okay, we have two

24:17

hostages, eight needs two. Possibly

24:19

both of them are Iron Striders. They're

24:21

being held for ransom, and if that

24:23

doesn't work, then they're gonna get eaten.

24:26

Okay, I don't feel as bad

24:29

about shooting a bunch of those

24:31

undead guys then. No, undead guys?

24:33

Oh yeah, shot one through the

24:35

head, and he sat right back

24:37

up. Cool. I thought we

24:39

were just dealing with werewolves. Is that

24:41

how you're supposed to deal with undead persons?

24:43

Just listen. I don't know how these empty

24:45

men work, but like, yeah, I put one

24:47

clean through his head. He sat

24:49

back up. I did fill him with holes again, and

24:52

he laid down long enough for me to

24:54

get out of there. So it's like a

24:56

zombie that doesn't die with you destroyed. But

24:59

also did die, because then

25:02

he sat and he uses zombies. But

25:04

also intelligent enough to be making

25:06

plans and holding people to ransom. I wonder

25:08

if they're all like that. I

25:10

didn't get a good enough look at the other one

25:13

while I was trying to see what it was. I

25:15

got attacked by the other one. What the hell does

25:17

a zombie want for ransom? It might be a smattering

25:19

of both. You said you saw some werewolf tracks,

25:21

right? I saw all sorts of tracks, so

25:23

we don't know who all is in here,

25:26

whether it's all empty men or like a

25:28

mixture. Yeah, well, either way, we gotta get

25:30

those people out. So let's move. Are there

25:32

empty wolf men? Oh, come on.

25:34

Don't put that in the universe, Russ. All

25:36

right. I mean, the time it took

25:38

to have this conversation was more than the time

25:41

it took to get from the end of the

25:43

road to the saloon. Like, I imagine part of

25:45

this happened while you are dismounting and hitching the

25:47

horses. When you are standing

25:49

in front of this worn old

25:51

building, it has swinging

25:53

double doors that are being buffeted by the

25:55

storm. They are swinging back and forth a

25:58

bit from the outside. It looks. empty

26:00

and miserable. I'll hold up both

26:02

pistols at my side and give

26:05

them all a nod and very

26:09

slowly creak the door

26:11

and see what I can see.

26:13

Okay, you creak the door and

26:15

look inside of this dimly lit

26:17

building. So dimly lit that it's

26:19

hard to tell from outside, especially

26:22

considering the daylight, but you can

26:24

tell that there are faint light

26:26

sources somewhere inside of here. You

26:28

can see an assortment of tables

26:31

standing around this room. There

26:33

is a stairwell on

26:35

the back wall that you can barely make

26:37

out. The bar is on your left, and

26:40

you can just make out the silhouettes

26:42

of figures sitting at some

26:44

of those tables deeper inside, and you hear

26:47

a voice say, you here to pay a

26:49

ransom? I look over my shoulder

26:51

at the others. Yep,

26:53

why don't you come on in? Let's talk

26:55

about it. I want to look up and

26:57

around to see if there's like anybody on

26:59

a second floor or anything. Read

27:02

a situation. Nine.

27:04

Okay, well that'll get you one

27:06

question. What's my enemy's crew position?

27:09

As you poke your head in behind Tass and kind

27:11

of look up and around, you

27:13

can see that there is a second

27:15

floor, like balcony, that leads around the

27:18

perimeter of this building. It seems like,

27:20

you know, the rooms are up there,

27:22

and you can make out figures who seem

27:24

to be crouching in the

27:26

darkness, trying to stay out of sight.

27:29

Yeah, I think real hard. Tass,

27:33

there's people... I'm

27:36

way too loud, because I don't know how it works. There's

27:39

people in ambush on the balcony. Straight

27:41

up? Both sides. Straight

27:44

up? Yeah, man. Yeah,

27:46

man, I'm not lying to you. Can

27:49

you guys take care of the ones on the balcony while

27:51

I deal with who's in here? Yeah, no problem. Yes,

27:54

I think so. All

27:59

right, and I'm going... to holster

28:01

my guns and think back

28:03

to them, I'm not so good at convincing these

28:05

people if I have to get in here close,

28:07

Kim. Yeah, trust

28:09

me, I was not feeling confident about taking

28:12

out the ambush squad above us, so yeah,

28:14

I'll come with you. Cool. And

28:16

I will open the door and step in with her.

28:19

Okay. I suppose I'll give custody of Jumbo

28:21

to Megan and Rev. You

28:23

handed the leash off. Yes

28:26

and Kim, you walk into the saloon.

28:29

Rev, Megan, Jumbo, what are you doing?

28:32

Okay, go with me on this. I

28:34

want to get in through one of the windows in the

28:36

rooms upstairs. Oh, okay. Yeah,

28:38

so if

28:40

this is possible, I'd love to

28:42

try and get up on Jumbo's

28:45

shoulders on the horse to get

28:47

as much height as possible. Damn,

28:49

this is like some Flying Grayson shit. I

28:53

was a cheerleader in sixth grade. Was

28:55

the horse? Blueberry

28:57

Milk with a name like that? Of course.

29:00

He was a flyer. Were you doing many

29:02

flies in sixth grade? Yeah, I was the

29:05

smallest one, so I was the one that

29:07

got thrown up in the air. One, two,

29:09

down, up. Let's go. Back it off,

29:11

let's go. All right, Blueberry Milk

29:13

joins your chant. Me, me,

29:15

down, up. No!

29:18

I was like, yeah, he's back

29:20

to not talking. Okay,

29:25

this is going to merit a stealth role.

29:27

I think this can be a teamwork if

29:29

both of you are trying to accomplish the

29:31

same thing to sneak around and get up

29:33

in a window. Should you go

29:35

into one and all focus on the

29:37

other side, or are you thinking we can take

29:42

out both sides from up above? That's up to

29:45

you. I mean, if I can get up there, I

29:47

can lower a rope and make it easier for you

29:49

to get in, and we can tag team them from

29:51

the same side. If I Stay here, I

29:53

Can try to blast out the supports underneath the

29:55

balcony on one side if you want to take

29:57

care of the other side. Yeah, that works. That

29:59

works.. Yeah, okay so not a

30:01

teamwork, just a straight up stealth on Megan's

30:03

part. Yeah, I'm just gonna crouching down by

30:05

the battling doors like looking underneath. And yeah

30:08

to come to scan Need a discreet still

30:10

throw from each of you them and co.

30:13

Ten a right, Turn it around. In

30:17

a rough eight. Oh my gosh,

30:19

I'm so proud of you both! Am blueberry

30:21

melt pink so quiet. And Jumbo being

30:23

so quiet are at Meghan which side

30:26

of the building are you going to?

30:28

I think. I'm looking for a window

30:30

that has the curtains closed like one

30:32

of the room the where I could

30:34

get up to the window and then

30:37

get a peek in there before going

30:39

in. Just makes no one's in their I

30:41

think if you take a quick peek at like

30:43

both sides you'll find that all the curtains are

30:45

drawn great. All go right and I'll

30:47

pick the third. Linda. Okay,

30:49

lucky number three, You climb onto

30:51

Blueberry Milk and sneak this window

30:54

open and start to make your

30:56

way inside on the ground floor.

30:58

Pass and Kim. As you head

31:00

inside, your eyes adjust to the

31:02

darkness a little bit. You are

31:04

slightly more able to make out

31:06

the figure who address you and

31:08

the others who are sitting at

31:10

his table. He is fairly close

31:12

to the stairs at the back.

31:14

V One speaking looks like a

31:16

human. He is middle aged. He's

31:18

got almost. Black hair that's kind of

31:21

shoulder length and pushed behind his ears.

31:23

He's wearing a a smart black hat

31:25

on. He's got like hours a goat.

31:27

He overall he's dressed pretty well on

31:30

the you can see that it's in

31:32

a little bit a rough shape, but

31:34

he's got kind of that like Gambler

31:36

A going on. The figures sitting with

31:38

him aren't anywhere near as well composed.

31:40

Their clothes look like they're more or

31:43

less in tatters. They look a little

31:45

bit. why old, The kind of look

31:47

like if he weren't in between. Them

31:49

they just be fucking shit up. But. He

31:52

gestures for you to come sets

31:54

and he says you're not dressed

31:56

like Iron Striders. While know would be

31:58

a pretty obvious target if we were. He

32:00

gonna shrugs welcome, have a drink,

32:02

forgive. Me: I'm a bit business

32:05

minded. I trust that their allies and

32:07

in good condition, right? Course, the

32:09

I'm in a Ransom off corpses. forgive

32:11

me. But we would like to see for ourselves.

32:14

Yeah, like seems like there's an awful lot

32:16

of corpses walking around out here already, Which

32:18

one It makes her hours or good. He.

32:20

Laughs Sure things Jack go fetch

32:23

him or and me figure. Sitting

32:25

to his left, stands up and

32:27

turns and start heading up the

32:30

stairs. Ya picked a hell of a

32:32

place to set up as empty man outside,

32:34

Are they yours? Oh. No, I feel

32:36

about disclose and trade secrets to the

32:38

Iron Striders, but I will accept your

32:40

compliments. It is a hell of a

32:42

place. The henchmen heads up the stairs

32:44

and takes a right and then a

32:46

left. are moving down a little stretch

32:49

of hallway that leads to the back

32:51

wall of the building and you hear

32:53

a door open up there and the

32:55

gentleman sitting at the table says wasn't

32:57

sure you all would come to collect

32:59

a couple your rookies we look after

33:01

our own. I'm sure you can understand

33:03

that I'm just doing the same. Of

33:06

course Rev: While this conversation is going

33:08

on and you are watching from under

33:10

the door and looking for your opening,

33:12

what to give me Just a straight

33:14

investigate? Rule ten: You're keeping an eye

33:16

on those figures up on the balcony

33:18

and switching your attention back and forth

33:20

between them and this character talking and

33:22

I think you catch just like up

33:24

like a micro gesture from him that

33:26

is otherwise innocuous. You always gotta had

33:28

a glass of whiskey and his hand

33:31

and he just he swales it in

33:33

a particular way that kind of gets

33:35

your attention. and as he does

33:37

you notice those two figures up on

33:39

the balconies stand up out of the

33:41

shadows i died the guy just instinctively

33:43

let go of them force energy and

33:46

try to knock the supports out from

33:48

underneath that okay meghan you can hear

33:50

tas and kim talking with this person

33:52

downstairs as you creep into this dark

33:54

room through the curtains you pretty quickly

33:56

notice that there's actually a significant chunk

33:59

of the floor missing in here.

34:01

There's just a hole through to the

34:03

floor below, which is why their voices

34:05

are carrying so clearly because the door

34:07

is shut to this room. You don't

34:09

see anybody in here. What little light

34:11

is entering through the curtains is just

34:13

highlighting the dust floating in the air.

34:15

What do you want to do? There's

34:17

a big hole in the floor? There's a big hole in the floor.

34:20

Does it look intentional or does it look

34:22

like this place is in a great condition?

34:24

So some of the floor rotted away, something

34:26

fell through here. What seems to be the

34:28

purpose of this terrible infrastructure?

34:30

I think with your

34:32

engineering expertise, it just

34:34

looks like the building is old and in shitty condition and

34:36

part of it started to fall apart. I want

34:39

to stick to the walls and

34:41

try to avoid making this rotten

34:44

floorboard situation any worse and

34:46

get over to the doorway, see if I can't

34:49

get eyes on what's going on out there. Okay,

34:51

you creep around the room and creak

34:54

that door open enough to see.

34:56

You can't quite spot the conversation

34:59

happening on the ground floor below

35:01

you, although you do hear retreating

35:03

footsteps of somebody on your side

35:06

moving away from you on the

35:08

upper floor towards the back wall and

35:10

entering a room. And then you can

35:12

see that figure crouched in the darkness

35:15

off to your left towards the front of

35:17

the building where Rev indicated. Okay,

35:19

well I can hear Kim and Tass

35:22

negotiating still, so I want to

35:24

try to silently take out the guy

35:26

to my left hiding in the shadow. I'm gonna

35:29

pull back to what I did

35:31

with the guy at the

35:34

church and try to mentally like

35:37

overwhelm his kind of psychic

35:40

mental state and kind of make him feel

35:43

Okay, right as you

35:45

start to do that you actually notice

35:47

both him and the one on the

35:49

other side starting to come to their

35:52

feet and then Rev bursts through the

35:54

saloon doors below you. So Rev, as

35:56

you blast force at the posts supporting

35:58

the balcony, I'll be right back. on

36:00

the left. Why don't you go

36:02

weird at just level two? You're just trying

36:04

to blast a broken rotting inanimate

36:06

object. And Megan, I'm gonna have you go weird

36:08

at level three because you are just trying to

36:11

functionally cause harm to a creature your own size. Ten.

36:15

Nice. Eight. Nice. All right.

36:17

Rev, you blast the column

36:19

directly underneath that shadowed figure

36:21

and it shatters and the

36:23

balcony falls and they hit

36:25

the ground on the first

36:27

floor with a pretty nasty

36:29

crunch sound. Megan, your target

36:31

grabs their head and starts

36:34

reeling and retching and

36:36

they just start kind of blindly rushing

36:39

in a direction that happens

36:41

to be yours, like following the

36:43

railing and the walls as

36:45

if trying to get to somewhere that they

36:48

will feel more sturdy. Tass and Kim, shit

36:50

pops off on either side of you. Oh,

36:52

it's sticking time. And

36:54

I'm gonna take a shot at a guy that

36:56

seems to be in charge here. Okay. Give me

36:58

a shoot roll. It's going to be opposed. You're

37:00

going to take a minus two. Okay. A

37:03

week for my shoot rolls today. That one is

37:05

just a flat ten. All

37:08

right. He draws quick, but you draw quicker.

37:10

You put a bullet in him and he

37:12

kind of rockets backwards into the chair that

37:14

he was trying to stand up and out

37:17

of and actually tips over backwards. But the

37:19

figure who was sitting to his right also

37:21

stands and draws a gun. Kim, what do

37:23

you want to do? Oh God,

37:25

I guess I'll try to shoot that guy.

37:27

Okay. Give me a shoot roll. Five.

37:30

Oh no. I know.

37:32

I know. I should have stayed in

37:34

my lane. Rev

37:38

just immediately started nodding. Megan

37:41

and I were there a couple episodes ago. I

37:44

should have just accepted that drink. The sad thing

37:47

is that my wealth level is at rich.

37:49

I was prepared. I was fully prepared to

37:51

just pay this ransom. You

37:56

know, I honestly hadn't

37:58

even considered that. as

38:01

a possible option. I was fully ready to

38:03

pay the ransom. Alright,

38:06

this other figure fires right

38:09

at your center mass. Go ahead and roll

38:11

the harm move. And this will

38:13

be for lethal harm. I really

38:16

hope you roll boxcars. Not just because I don't want

38:18

you to possibly die, but I think

38:20

it's just so funny every time we've taken like

38:22

an axe to the chest or something terrible. And

38:24

it's just like, yeah, you're fine. It was pretty

38:26

good. What's the modifier for this?

38:29

It is a revolver, so it'll be a

38:31

plus one. Okay, well, this is about as fair as it can

38:33

be. It's a flat roll for me. Nine.

38:37

Okay, so on a seven to nine, you take

38:39

a wound, describe it

38:41

and write it on your character sheet. You

38:43

cannot act for a moment and take minus

38:45

one ongoing to body rolls until you are

38:47

healed. Describe

38:49

it? Gunshot. Yeah, yeah.

38:53

Gunshot wound. Like where? And how does it

38:55

disable you here? You

38:57

know, it's not permanent, but like you can't act for

38:59

a moment. Why? What does this shot do

39:01

to you other than hurt real fucking bad? Just

39:03

a casual gunshot to the abdomen and I'm

39:06

knocked off my chair. Okay, so write that

39:08

on your character sheet. Note that you will take

39:10

minus one ongoing to all body rolls and

39:13

you will need to be attended to and you will

39:15

need some days to fully heal from this. Yeah, that

39:17

makes sense. Yeah, you

39:19

all see Kim take this shot

39:21

and fall backwards. And

39:24

you see on the opposite side of the table, this

39:27

man, the gambler, who tasks

39:29

blasted, rolling out of the

39:31

chair and onto all fours

39:33

and struggling. And you

39:35

see his body start to shift

39:37

and you hear him shout as

39:39

his voice starts to change mid-sentence.

39:42

Jack, release the dogs.

39:56

Thank you. The

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40:54

I'm climbing into the driver seat, I'm gonna say

40:56

to Sarah, sometimes you gotta make tough

41:23

decisions. I'm driving now. And

41:25

it peaks as the danger and excitement

41:28

hits the zenith, leading to

41:30

great failure or success. And this

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tension relaxes, a tragedy, but more often

41:49

humor that comes with great pals

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Discover sign on your favorite podcast

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The choices of the characters are theirs to make, but

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