0:00

The Limit Does Not Exist is a production of

0:02

I Heart Radio. Hey,

0:12

I'm Christina Wallace and I'm Kate Scott

0:15

Campbell and you're listening to The Limit

0:17

does Not Exist, a podcast for

0:19

human then Diagrams, coming at you every

0:21

single week and hosted by us

0:27

Hi Friends, Hi Friends. It

0:30

is a strange and

0:33

uncertain time in the

0:35

world right now. Um,

0:37

we are in a pandemic. We are

0:39

isolated. For those of

0:42

us with kids, we are having to learn how

0:44

to work and take care of them

0:46

at the same time, and

0:50

everything fills up in the air with no

0:52

known endpoint. Yeah,

0:56

and while we all might be socially

0:59

distant, we

1:01

are grateful for the opportunity to connect

1:04

with you through our voices

1:06

and your ears. You

1:08

know. It's really something that we don't take lightly

1:11

ever, especially right now.

1:13

Absolutely, and it's why we

1:15

are recording this special episode

1:18

at eight am Pacific eleven

1:21

am Eastern on March

1:23

eighth. Is it Wednesday? I think it's

1:25

Wednesday. Yeah, it's Wednesday.

1:28

We we think that's important to mention

1:31

since the world might look a lot different when

1:33

we release this episode in a few days. That's

1:36

right, it might look a lot different in

1:38

an hour. Generally

1:40

we record episodes weeks in advance,

1:43

just letting you in on our process a little bit, so

1:45

this one will probably sound

1:47

different. Shout out to Maya for the quick

1:49

turnaround. Thanks Maya, Thank

1:51

you. What's important

1:53

to us is that you know that we're

1:56

here. So we're going to share some resources,

1:59

some ideas, our feelings,

2:03

a word of encouragement maybe that we

2:05

hope will help, and we may

2:07

not know what tomorrow we'll

2:09

bring, but we know we can get through it together.

2:12

That's right. You know, we don't know what

2:14

to do. I think no one really knows what to

2:16

do. But you know, if

2:18

anyone can roll with the punches and navigate

2:20

uncertainty, it's this community

2:23

of human ben diagrams. This

2:25

is usually where we'd say let's jump in, shall we?

2:28

And then our theme music would pop

2:30

back in. But that

2:33

even that feels kind of weird right now, Christina,

2:36

Let's just keep going, shall

2:39

we? Yeah, let's do that. Kate,

2:42

how are you? Oh?

2:46

I mean, how do I answer that question? You

2:48

know? Like, I'll give

2:50

an answer and probably in thirty

2:52

seconds I'll feel differently. Um.

2:55

Maybe an easier one is where am I

2:58

am on the floor right now of

3:04

of this house? That I've been renting for the last year,

3:06

and by myself. I do have

3:08

Rosie, which is wonderful.

3:12

Rosie is my seven pound

3:15

poodle, the cutest dog

3:17

ever. She's she's you know, she's

3:19

my little angel. I feel like she is carrying

3:21

more emotion than any

3:25

any animal of her size should

3:27

carry right now. And she's like She'll just start

3:30

sort of shaking at random times, and I'm

3:32

like, oh, same, right,

3:36

well, she is like this little mirror to me.

3:38

She's like this little sponge and I'm like, oh,

3:40

yeah, yeah, I'm not doing a good

3:42

job of faking it in front of you. Rosy, Am I

3:44

not that I need to? How

3:48

how are you? I

3:51

mean, ah, I'm

3:54

in six square feet with my

3:56

husband and my baby. How's

4:00

New York apartments were not designed

4:02

to spend a lot of time in.

4:05

Um, we don't have a yard. You

4:08

know, We've got Prospect Park

4:11

pretty close by, and I have been able to

4:13

get outside. I went for a

4:15

a two mile walk this morning with Art and went

4:18

down there's like a little wooded area in the

4:20

park and people are smart, they're keeping

4:22

their distance. But you know, normally

4:24

something like that would like fill my well

4:26

and I'd be great for you know, the rest

4:29

of the day, and I think my solitude

4:31

and happiness and then lasted like forty

4:34

two minutes and then I

4:36

came back and, um,

4:40

my husband has a phone voice. I

4:42

have a phone voice. They're they're very loud,

4:45

and um, and Arta

4:47

needed to go down for a nap, and

4:50

Chass is on the phone and his work

4:52

is so important. He's like on the emergency

4:54

management team for the city. Like he's doing such

4:57

important work right now. So I feel like I have no

4:59

right to ever interrupted.

5:03

And so because both things can be true.

5:05

His work can be important and it can be very

5:07

very difficult to navigate around for you and

5:11

like, you know, we were getting ready for us

5:13

to record this episode. In the middle of this,

5:17

a person I like very much. Usually

5:19

the calls he's running

5:21

for Congress and he's asking for a donation, and

5:24

they like started, you know, getting

5:26

phone number area codes that look like the area

5:28

code you're in, because you know, people are more likely

5:30

to pick up. Because all the time just

5:34

like went off on him, and he

5:37

probably deserved maybe of

5:40

that frustration. Um,

5:43

but the rest of it was just it

5:45

was all me And I

5:47

hung up feeling terrible and

5:50

thinking like Wow. Okay, so that moment

5:52

of zen is gone already, and

5:55

you know it's eleven am and I have a full

5:57

day ahead. So um,

6:01

yeah, I'm trying to find

6:03

the gratitude. I'm

6:05

happy, I'm healthy, my family

6:08

is healthy and

6:10

you know, staying inside. We have food, we

6:12

have FaceTime to

6:14

see each other. Um,

6:16

I'm trying to find the gratitude and

6:19

then it like sometimes it takes me down dark places,

6:22

right Like I'm grateful that my

6:25

life insurance policy got approved a few weeks

6:27

ago. Yeah, Grateful

6:29

that Chad and I have a living will and

6:32

a directive for who's going to take care of our

6:34

baby if something happens to us. Like, I

6:37

am grateful for those things, and then I start thinking

6:39

about them and everything just feels really overwhelming.

6:43

And it's really hard to shake that off once

6:45

I go down that path, you know, I

6:48

do. I do. I Mean the

6:50

reason that I posted a

6:52

little video of like dancing in the kitchen

6:54

with Rosy last night is because I couldn't sleep

6:57

and I was like, what do I

6:59

do? Let put on music that usually

7:01

helps me, just some comforting

7:03

music you living alone? Yeah,

7:06

I mean that would be really hard. No,

7:08

it is, you know, I think

7:10

that times like this,

7:12

and I say that in quotes because this is we've

7:15

never experienced this before, but

7:18

challenging times. Maybe it's a better way to say

7:20

that, just have a way of shining

7:23

a spotlight on everything, you

7:25

know, especially things that you

7:28

maybe try to um

7:31

by you I can only speak for myself, but maybe

7:33

try to just like gloss over, you know.

7:35

And yeah,

7:37

it's how do I say

7:40

this. I'm both like a very

7:42

decided optimist and

7:45

I'm a very

7:48

very strong em path, and

7:50

so I've been having

7:52

to be really sort of careful with myself

7:55

and just like really graceful with myself because

7:58

I do UM, I

8:00

do want to sort of take everything on um

8:03

mentally and emotionally and for

8:06

myself. Yeah, living by myself

8:08

is something that I've been doing for the last year and a

8:10

half, and working

8:12

from home is something that I've been doing for quite some time.

8:14

But yeah,

8:18

it's it's definitely felt

8:20

very very lonely UM

8:23

at a lot of times, like it's it's very easy

8:25

to like notice that I, UM,

8:28

While I'm very grateful that I have my parents

8:31

and my brother and sister in law they're up in the Bay Area,

8:33

and that they have food, and they're okay. Like

8:36

in terms of my own family

8:39

that I have cultivated, that's rosie and

8:42

like that's so again,

8:45

I'm really working to be grateful

8:47

that, like I currently have

8:49

food. It's a really random

8:52

hodge bonch of things. I'm

8:55

kind of calling it my picnic spread because basically

8:57

what I could get at the stores like salami and cheese

8:59

and some roadus. But that's like that's great,

9:01

you know. Um

9:03

yeah, I'm grateful that my parents have food.

9:06

Um. You know, that was like a

9:08

whole morning where I was like, do I go

9:10

up there? Even though Shelter in Place

9:13

is happening up in the Bay Area, Like what

9:16

do I do? You know?

9:18

Um? So yeah, I

9:21

think it's like absolutely normal

9:23

and okay to feel absolutely

9:25

opposite emotions,

9:28

um, at the same time and

9:30

right next to each other. And I think

9:33

what I've been trying to do is just give myself

9:36

grace and kind

9:38

of try to mom myself in a really gentle

9:40

way and be like, you

9:43

know, it's okay for me, Like

9:45

it's both things can happen.

9:47

I can both work to find the

9:49

silver lining and help lift

9:52

other people up, and I can just like

9:55

really cry it out for

9:57

a while you know, and it's important

10:00

sheat mask and then mask.

10:03

Yeah, I emerge from this with the best

10:05

skin of my I

10:08

have a sheet mask so

10:10

and I've been like waiting to use it, but today

10:12

is the day. Yeah,

10:14

I think it might be. I'm also like digging

10:17

out all of my travel

10:19

size moisturizer and lotions

10:21

and I am not

10:24

going to have Ashley skin. At

10:27

the very least I can be hydrated

10:29

and moisturized. Oh my gosh, shopping

10:31

the medicine cabinet is such a great idea.

10:34

Like I've been shopping my refrigerator to like

10:36

I have created very creative meals

10:38

for myself. I mean I ate a salad

10:41

last night, Like if you know that salad

10:44

is not my top five favorite

10:46

foods, and I was like, this

10:49

arugula is going to go bad, and right now I

10:51

can't afford for food to spoil, So

10:53

no eating a salad, that's

10:57

right. I mean, I was shopping my freezer. I

10:59

have never squealed old so loudly is

11:01

to find seven frozen shrimp left

11:03

in there. I was like, oh my gosh,

11:06

this changes everything.

11:08

That is very exciting. Instead

11:11

of like the only shrimp that's left of the store is like

11:13

the forty dollar pack, which is why people are buying

11:15

it. You know, I have some

11:18

Reese's peanut butter cups in the freezer that

11:20

I'm trying to forget about until

11:22

the moment that is so desperate that I need

11:24

them. And then the kind of

11:26

self discipline that I am

11:30

I just need to give so much

11:32

respect to. This is such a

11:36

I don't want to say unfortunate time to

11:38

be a freelancer or some who

11:40

pieces together income from a lot of different

11:42

places, but but

11:44

it is certainly a challenging time for

11:47

that. UM. You know, if you are

11:49

suddenly finding yourself entirely

11:51

unemployed or I

11:54

think like me and probably like you, projects

11:56

that were slated to go ahead maybe around

11:59

pause, yeah,

12:01

the unforeseeable future.

12:03

UM. We wanted to

12:06

pull some some tools and resources

12:08

that we've seen so far. We'll link to these

12:10

in our show notes. UM,

12:12

and you know, if you guys come across

12:14

any other ones and want to tweet them at us, we

12:17

will be amplify and you know, continue adding

12:19

to the show notes as as things

12:21

come online. But yes, you found

12:23

this incredible list of resources

12:26

for the arts. UM.

12:29

What this is a

12:31

great exhaustive list and certainly

12:34

not exhaustive, but it's robust

12:36

from Creative Capital. I think they're based

12:38

in New York. But yeah,

12:41

I mean I think

12:43

everyone just heard me audibly sigh into

12:45

the microphone, because, like

12:48

you said, Christina, I do have

12:50

some work happening right now, but people very close

12:52

to me have no work for the foreseeable future,

12:55

and so there are resources

12:57

that people are calling to get

13:00

there. They may be band aids, but

13:03

you know, it's something. And so this

13:05

list, which uh

13:08

I shared on our Instagram stories as

13:10

well, and by the way, tag us

13:12

on Instagram too. We'll just keep

13:14

a highlight going of resources

13:17

UM up in our highlights as well as on

13:20

Twitter and our website. But this

13:22

lists a lot of great UM

13:24

relief funds and it's being

13:26

continually updated, so

13:29

everything from emergency grants

13:32

to you know, general types

13:35

of of resources like for

13:37

example, I sent my brother one last night

13:39

for musicians who are currently

13:41

out of work because tours

13:44

or events have gotten UM

13:46

shutdowns. So you know, I think it's

13:48

definitely worth clicking on the link, and then from

13:50

there there's many other things too click

13:53

on and see if you apply. Yeah,

13:55

but Christina, you found also something for

13:58

New York small businesses too. Yeah,

14:00

so New York City is offering uh

14:03

small businesses that have fewer than a hundred

14:05

employees zero interest

14:08

loans of up to seventy right

14:11

now, which is really

14:13

quite lovely. And for you know, micro

14:15

businesses, those with you know, five or fewer

14:18

employees. Um, they're offering grants

14:21

to cover of payroll

14:23

costs for the next two months

14:26

in order to um,

14:28

you know, keep you from having to layoff employees.

14:31

So um we will link to both of those

14:35

as well as um. You

14:37

know, there's a fund that we found, convert

14:40

Kit Creators Fund. They're giving micro

14:43

grants. I know their initial bulk

14:46

of money has all all been depleted,

14:48

but I think um people have

14:50

started to see that they're a great

14:52

kind of clearing house for these grants,

14:54

and more people are donating.

14:57

So I would, um, you

14:59

know, head that way, add your name to the list. You

15:01

might not get it right away, but as they fundraise

15:03

more, I think there's going to be more available.

15:06

UM. So check that out. That's

15:08

for childcare, groceries, medical

15:11

bills or five. Um

15:13

it's you know, below the taxable income

15:16

whatever, so um, so

15:18

they can just give it free and clear. So check

15:21

that out. That's great, you know, honestly,

15:23

just UM, file for unemployment.

15:25

That's kind of the number one UH.

15:28

If you're eligible, file for it. A lot

15:30

of states are waiving the UH

15:33

investigation period or the waiting period.

15:35

Usually it's like ten days or so after you file.

15:38

UM. A lot of states are waiving that, so you can start

15:40

getting unemployment checks right away. UM.

15:43

And you know, there's there's talk

15:46

of lots of different ways the government, either

15:48

state or federal might step

15:50

in. They've pushed back the tax

15:52

filing deadline by ninety days, so

15:55

you've got an extra three months on your taxes. I mean,

15:57

obviously this is a highly UH

15:59

you've evolving situation, right, but I

16:02

would say, UM, these are a couple of places

16:04

to start. And I am

16:07

optimistic that, um,

16:10

even though we don't have a strong social safety

16:12

net in this country, that individuals

16:15

are not going to let their neighbors go hungry

16:17

or get kicked out of their homes. And I

16:21

I hope and I believe that this is going

16:23

to bond us stronger because people

16:25

realize that we need everyone

16:28

in our community to have a

16:30

base level of safety and security and

16:32

health. If we want to have that for ourselves.

16:35

I think what's helpful for resource like this

16:38

creative capitalist is I

16:40

certainly know, having worked off

16:42

of ten and nine's for so long, filing

16:45

for unemployment is not necessarily

16:47

an option. If you don't have W two's, it

16:49

can be really difficult to um

16:52

even qualify for things like this,

16:54

So I think it's really worth clicking

16:57

through, looking through, asking

17:00

friends and colleagues. I think for

17:02

me, certainly, the freelance mentality has

17:04

been one of well, I don't

17:06

have a corporation backing

17:09

me up. You know, I don't have certain infrastructure,

17:11

and it can feel like when work goes away,

17:14

there are no options. Um.

17:17

But I'm very

17:19

happy to see that they're popping up now. Again,

17:22

they're not going to necessarily

17:24

match the income that's been coming

17:26

in, but um, I think

17:28

the message is that you're

17:30

not alone. If we can say anything, it's

17:33

that there's

17:54

other creative things being shared to like, for

17:56

example, we all know that south

17:58

By Southwest was unsold. Many

18:01

screenings theaters are closed.

18:03

Um. There's some resources on this creative

18:06

capitalist, like how to plan a virtual

18:08

event on video if you're screening got

18:10

canceled, how to host a watch party

18:13

on Facebook for schools

18:15

for um different companies

18:19

or brands or even individuals where you might have

18:21

planned something that needs multiple

18:23

people to look at it. We

18:26

all know that we can't outsmart

18:28

the market, and in this case, the

18:30

market being every sense of that word right

18:33

Like I can't get an acting job

18:35

right now because auditions aren't

18:37

happening and production is

18:39

shut down. I know that, So I'm

18:41

not going to try to outsmart the circumstances

18:44

there. That's not the message.

18:47

But I think we're starting to see ways that

18:49

people are finding to shift

18:52

and to approach problems from new angles.

18:55

You know, could you offer an online class for visibility?

18:58

Could you schedule FaceTime coffee chats

19:00

if you're currently seeking new

19:03

lines of work and no one wants

19:05

to have actual coffee with you? Can

19:07

you shine up your portfolio? Not

19:10

putting pressure on yourself to know

19:12

how to crack this, That's not what I'm saying,

19:15

but starting to kind of maybe

19:17

be open to ways of

19:20

navigating it for those of us with children.

19:23

Yes, I've been seeing some

19:27

delightfully well intentioned tweets

19:30

and Instagram post of people pointing

19:32

out that Shakespeare wrote King Lear during

19:35

a lockdown God, that

19:38

Isaac Newton had his miracle

19:40

year where he uh you

19:42

know, discovered calculus,

19:45

developed the theory of gravity, had this

19:47

incredibly productive year, and

19:49

um, I am grateful for the for

19:52

the responses to those well

19:54

intentioned tweets

19:57

pointing out that Shakespeare

20:00

abandoned his children and had

20:02

his wife raised them while he went off to write,

20:05

and Isaac Newton was celibate.

20:07

So I would like to bring the pressure

20:10

down from emerging from this with the

20:12

next because

20:14

I'm not going to know. Um,

20:18

I am going to emerge from this, hopefully

20:20

with most of my hair

20:24

and a fair amount

20:26

of of

20:28

my sanity and maybe

20:32

of the work product that I would

20:34

have gotten done in the same time period.

20:37

And I have it easy. I have a

20:39

four month old who doesn't

20:41

talk all day long, who can't move

20:44

on her own, yet she can roll on her side,

20:46

can't even roll all the way over. Uh,

20:48

and we only have one between two

20:50

parents. Like that's the ideal situation

20:54

with children. If you are outnumbered

20:57

by your children, or if they are

20:59

talking your off, or if

21:01

they need you know, constant

21:03

supervision or you know, need

21:05

help with school. Uh, homeschooling

21:08

is like a whole other thing. Um,

21:10

this is gonna be who

21:13

this is going to be a challenge, so I just want to bring

21:16

the pressure down. We don't expect every

21:18

single person to emerge from this. We don't expect

21:21

literally anyone to emerge from this with the

21:23

next King lear Okay, yeah, oh my god, absolutely

21:26

say that. And I think it's a really good time

21:28

to say, like, if we mentioned

21:30

something that that you find is like

21:33

a helpful point of view or rasturs

21:35

awesome, if we mentioned something that's

21:37

like not, that's also

21:40

awesome, Like that's also fine. The

21:43

thing is, everyone's circumstances are so

21:46

so different. So yes, yeah, we

21:49

don't say the effort on our show, but like

21:52

screw King lear M,

21:55

as they say on The Good Place

21:58

fork that for that.

22:01

Yeah, and I think you know, to your point,

22:03

Christina, to like on the topic of

22:06

working from home, any advice

22:08

that I could give is going to be like really

22:10

small, basic. Again, I want

22:12

to what do they say instead of the sah word on

22:14

a good play

22:18

short short, we're

22:22

just talking. I honestly find that

22:24

there is this like inverse proportion of like

22:26

when things are really hard, it's

22:28

sometimes the tiniest ship that

22:31

can help, right, Like

22:33

for example, uh,

22:36

Patty Kim who's this natural path who

22:38

I follow, who's based in l A. Like she had

22:40

this post that was like put socks on, and

22:42

I was like, oh. She's

22:44

like it's actually like from an Eastern medicine

22:47

standpoint, like it actually boost immunity.

22:49

But it's also like, yeah, keep your

22:51

feet warm, you know. Yeah.

22:54

And while that seems so small, um,

22:57

those little things, Like my

23:00

mom used to say this thing to me when I was

23:02

spiraling down an anxiety spiral,

23:05

where she would go like, hey, Kate, just

23:08

like go outside and notice what

23:10

color is the sky? Like she would ask me. She'd be like, what

23:12

color is the sky? And I'd be like, oh, I don't.

23:14

I don't care, you know, like I don't know,

23:17

like my life is in shambles, you know. She's

23:19

like, just go out and notice, and I'd be like, well, it's it's

23:21

blue. She's like, wow, isn't that interesting?

23:25

Like that little

23:27

thing. I

23:29

can certainly speak to working from home as an individual,

23:33

realizing that it's not including working

23:35

from home with children. I mean, what's your Do

23:37

you have any insights on that from doing

23:39

it? So far? Yea, so so

23:42

far. It's just you're setting the

23:44

expectation with everyone in your life

23:46

that like, this is going to be messy.

23:48

So I was on a FaceTime or a

23:51

zoom work call yesterday with

23:53

a bunch of writers in l A And

23:55

in the middle of it, my baby had a meltdown,

23:57

and so I had to pick her up and

24:00

take her back and hold her with one

24:02

arm and keep her past fire in with

24:04

the other hand and rock her back and forth

24:07

while talking about cashlow

24:10

statements. Um, And

24:13

like, I think that probably would

24:15

have been mortifying in a previous life

24:17

would be like, oh my god, it feels so unprofessional.

24:20

Um. And now I don't care. Uh.

24:22

And you know, and I'm doing this while wearing

24:24

like a crop top and my pajama pants,

24:26

and I don't care. I know some people say,

24:29

like get up, put on real clothes, shower,

24:31

put on a bra. Like that's

24:33

not reality for me right now.

24:36

It might be in two weeks when

24:38

I can't tell morning from night, but

24:41

right now reality is like, uh,

24:44

is my hair pulled back? Do I have a shirt

24:47

on before I get on my zoom call? Because I'm

24:49

still breastfeeding and sometimes

24:51

I'm not wearing a shirt. Um, the

24:53

waist down really doesn't matter for the zoom call.

24:55

So you're good. There doesn't unless you're getting

24:57

up and moving during the call and

25:00

not it does. I did do that yesterday, so

25:02

that's it. And then I would say, as someone

25:04

who doesn't have a backyard, keep

25:06

your windows open. Get fresh air as much

25:08

as you can, even if it makes your apartment a

25:10

little chili right now, put on extra

25:12

layers, put on those socks. But get

25:15

fresh air. And then you know, in

25:17

the moments when you can sneak outside, go for

25:19

a walk, do what you need to. Try

25:21

to do it every little bit, I

25:23

think feels like it makes a difference. And the same

25:25

sort of physical activity, like I'm planking

25:28

in the middle of my living room and doing

25:31

wall sits and like trying to find ways

25:33

to stay some way active because

25:36

just sitting, like we were never designed to

25:38

sit six eighteen hours a day.

25:40

Yeah, no, it's it's

25:42

true. You know. We'll we'll link to a couple

25:44

of articles with different resources

25:46

and tips for working from home. What

25:49

I would say, you know, is for

25:52

me, trying to keep some

25:54

little tiny routine things

25:57

like even and that's very different from

25:59

like needing things to be orderly, Like

26:02

those are two different things, and I want to make that clearer, because

26:04

I think the most important message is just

26:07

taking the pressure off. You may

26:09

start to hear rosie makes sounds right

26:11

now because she's right here by me. Hold up,

26:14

um, but just like take pressure off for

26:16

it to look any certain way other than

26:18

what is manageable for you at

26:21

this point. But certainly like tiny

26:23

things like for me, if I know that

26:26

I can, like when I went to the store,

26:28

I was able to get coffee and I got

26:30

it because I know that for me, just making that

26:32

cup of coffee makes me

26:35

feel like, Okay, there's some routine

26:37

in my day. I have a friend

26:39

who is working from home and she's just

26:42

trying to close her laptop to eat lunch,

26:44

even if that's five minutes, uh,

26:47

if it can be longer, right,

26:49

yeah, Like do things like take a real lunch,

26:51

if you can take regular screen

26:53

breaks, even if you have to set an alarm on your phone

26:56

to go, okay just at

26:59

you know, fifty five on the hour. If

27:01

I can, I'm going to just take

27:04

a screen break setting something like

27:06

a bedtime alarm, which if you have kids,

27:08

that piece of advice may not be helpful whatsoever,

27:11

but um, you know, trying to just set yourself

27:14

up for success. Like I know, for me, even

27:16

before I go to bed. Now, some nights I'm just

27:18

like collapsing into bed whatever.

27:21

Right, I don't get this right every time, but

27:23

sometimes, like if I can clean

27:26

my workspace so that when I wake

27:28

up in the morning it's in some semblance

27:31

of order, Little things like that

27:33

can help me, you know, sort of segmenting

27:35

my day like for example, and I even did this

27:37

when I lived in a sixteen by nine apartment

27:40

in New York. Like even

27:42

just like changing locations was helpful

27:44

for me, even if it meant going from

27:47

the floor to the chair back

27:49

to the floor, right, Like, if that was

27:51

my option, that definitely helped

27:54

m sure my head space. My favorite

27:57

tip right now, if anyone has

28:00

Zoom, if they're doing call

28:02

specifically on a Zoom platform, you

28:04

can go into your settings and

28:07

there is a check box that

28:09

applies basically it's a beauty

28:12

filter. It's like an Instagram beauty filter, so

28:14

you can and then instead

28:17

of you having to put on makeup. I'm

28:20

not joking, I've done this. I

28:23

will do you putting on makeup. The technology

28:26

applies it for you. Hashtag

28:28

You're welcome. That is a hero A

28:30

modern day hero whoever, whoever

28:34

designed that. But yeah, I think you know, I think

28:36

that. Yeah, the point is do what works

28:38

for you. Like for me, I

28:41

realized that I did want to start putting

28:43

genes and a braw on just because it

28:45

was like helping my emotional

28:48

state to do that. So

28:51

but for you, you may be like, oh, I'm

28:53

going full like comfy.

28:56

There's no right here. I mean right now,

28:58

right now, that's where I am.

29:17

So as much as it's important to figure out how to work

29:19

from home, I also want to talk about

29:22

what to do when you're not working, because this is the

29:24

one you know, this is the hardest

29:26

thing for people who work from home period, is

29:28

like there are no boundaries

29:31

in your day or there it can feel

29:33

like there are no boundaries. And I think in the

29:35

middle of this right now, we're

29:37

even more prone to that because certainly, when I'm

29:39

working, I'm not thinking about this and

29:42

and so I don't want this to suddenly

29:44

become the thing that you're working all the time to

29:46

avoid scrolling Twitter. Um

29:49

So, my favorite thing to do in

29:51

the last few days is face

29:53

time at least one

29:56

person, and I've been doing lots of

29:58

people every single day. Need to talk to a

30:00

human who is not my husband or my daughter,

30:04

um, every day and

30:06

uh, in particular, doing like group

30:09

happy hour with some

30:12

of the women in my professional network where we

30:14

all just get on and we're drinking

30:16

our drink of choice, which could be water hydrate

30:19

all day and um and just

30:21

checking in, you know, with each other and and

30:23

keeping those social connections

30:25

strong even when we're having to keep our physical

30:28

connections quite distant. Yes,

30:30

yes, such an important point. You know,

30:33

connecting with others is just it's

30:35

so essential

30:37

for mental health and knowing that

30:39

even if you are isolated,

30:42

which so many of us are, you're

30:44

not alone. And you know,

30:47

it's not easy to reach out

30:49

for everybody, like it's not. On both sides

30:51

of that, it can be difficult to reach

30:54

out to offer help and know what to say that's

30:56

even going to be helpful, and it can be difficult

30:58

to ask for help. And what

31:01

sort of helped me with that is to just

31:03

take a pause and go like, what

31:06

would be helpful if

31:08

someone could offer it to me right now, or

31:11

what might bring me comfort? And how

31:13

can I kind of pass that on

31:15

to somebody else? And I think

31:18

I've just been so grateful for even

31:20

just a little quick emoji

31:22

text or a hello from people that I

31:24

haven't heard from for quite some

31:26

time. Um. And then other

31:29

friends have gotten more creative, like I

31:31

have set up FaceTime drink

31:33

dates, and a friend invited

31:35

me to a Skype book club. A

31:39

friend of mine last night just did her

31:41

own Instagram live of excuse

31:44

me. I just have like a

31:46

coffee throat um of

31:49

of reading out of her diary and like

31:51

just honestly being in my kitchen by

31:53

myself at ten

31:55

o'clock at night and listening to Annie

31:57

like read about her hopes and dreams in her twenty These

32:00

just gave me a lot of comfort. I really

32:02

did. I thought it was a really clever idea. I

32:04

love that I have a number of

32:06

friends who are amazing cooks

32:09

who are offering remote

32:12

not cooking lessons per se, but like

32:15

recipe consulting.

32:17

They're basically like, show me what you have in your

32:20

in your cupboard, and I

32:22

will help you figure out what to make for dinner

32:24

that is not just like the bare

32:26

minimum, but it's actually nourishing

32:29

and you know, actually feeds

32:31

you. So I've really appreciate

32:33

it. I mean, lucky for me, Chaz cooks. So

32:36

this is not a thing I need, but I

32:39

appreciate that, like, this

32:41

could be very hard. I mean, I think about a lot

32:43

of New Yorkers, like, we don't cook for

32:46

the most part. Um, it's just

32:48

the thing that a lot of folks do. And

32:50

so suddenly relying on

32:52

yourself to make three meals a day

32:54

for a very long time from

32:57

raw ingredients is

33:00

is it can feel overwhelming and I

33:02

think you don't want to Like, I love pop

33:04

tarts, but you can't eat them three meals a day. So

33:07

um, I've really appreciated the

33:09

people offering kind of nourishment

33:11

and sustenance via

33:14

kind of cooking advice. Well, I

33:16

think I think that's great. My friend Rachel

33:18

has an Instagram account called Virtual Cooking

33:20

Club, and she's been doing this for a while where she'll

33:23

just cook a recipe on a Sunday night, but

33:25

she's been offering things like, um,

33:28

similarly recipes with limited

33:31

ingredients. Um. Also she's been

33:33

offering resources for if

33:35

you can't get like I know at my grocery

33:37

store, I can't get the kinds

33:39

of proteins or even pasta

33:42

or rice that I would normally get and

33:45

um. She shared the fact that a lot of

33:47

small local restaurants and businesses

33:49

are doing special care packages

33:52

and deliveries. There's a taco place in

33:54

l A that's doing this package

33:56

of just like some basic meats

33:58

and tortillas and a pack

34:00

of toilet paper, which is awesome.

34:03

So yeah, so I

34:05

think it's also about thinking like

34:08

what are what are things that I could share? I

34:10

know I'm just really leaning on my

34:13

online friends right now and really

34:16

love hearing just any input

34:18

people have. I think that's when I

34:20

find hope in social media instead

34:23

of and you know, I agree, And

34:25

I think a big part for me right now is

34:28

is going beyond the scrolling

34:31

and the liking and the commenting, but actually

34:33

getting to the talking again, whether

34:36

phone or video. I

34:39

think for a lot of

34:41

my relationships, especially post

34:44

baby, you have that kind of benefit of the asynchronicity.

34:49

Uh you know, I'm I'm scrolling

34:51

at three in the morning while I'm nursing and

34:53

they can see my comment whenever they wake up,

34:56

and there is some benefit to that. But I think right

34:58

now there's something really magical

35:00

about connecting in real time. Yeah,

35:03

So returning to the and it's not

35:05

like you don't know where they are, they're sitting

35:08

at home. Yeah, yeah, that's

35:11

right. Returning to like the phone call,

35:13

the meandering two hour long phone call

35:16

um for gen Z, that's where you pick up

35:18

the phone and you call someone. It

35:22

might feel really scary at first, by promise

35:24

you're going to be super used to it by the end of this there

35:26

is this free pass, and not

35:28

even a free pass, like a real need

35:31

to just reach out, you know. And

35:34

and I think it's really great to kind of just go through

35:36

your contact list and think, like, who

35:39

can I just say hi to, Who can I set up

35:41

something with? Who might be absolutely

35:43

by themselves right now? You know, I know every

35:45

time I hear from a friend it's

35:48

not just Rosie, and that means

35:50

so much to me, It really does. UM.

35:53

I think it's also really important to mention

35:55

that mental health can be absolutely

35:58

is affected by the US, right and so

36:01

reaching out in an even uh

36:04

more pointed way to things

36:07

like mental health hotlines or

36:10

a therapy even if it's just trying

36:12

out a therapy app, or an

36:14

app like grid Diary where you can just track

36:16

your mood and from day to day

36:19

and just sort of touch base

36:21

with how you are, because

36:23

there's just a lot to carry

36:25

right now. And if you find

36:27

yourself wandering around your house having

36:30

really dark thoughts, which I

36:32

know I have so been prone to,

36:35

and we all are in a way, I

36:37

think it's um, it's really

36:41

uh okay

36:42

and high Rosie.

36:45

Rosie's like, yeah, she has guys, she's

36:47

been wandering arout well.

36:49

So I also want to emphasize this is especially

36:52

true for anyone who's in recovery. So

36:55

if you are sober, if you

36:57

are UM in you know,

36:59

an eating disorder recovery,

37:01

isolation is a thing that

37:04

can can undo

37:07

so much of the work that you have put into

37:09

that recovery. So I've seen

37:11

so many resources pop up on my

37:14

feeds of friends who

37:16

are offering to be sponsors, to check in

37:18

with folks, to do distance

37:22

meetings. So UM, I

37:24

think, in particular, before you

37:26

feel like you're spiraling, if you know you're in

37:28

one of those categories, if you know you're vulnerable

37:30

to this, find a support,

37:33

reach out to a community now before

37:35

it gets um more challenging.

37:37

Yeah, I will share a link to

37:39

this resource. UM that

37:42

the National Alliance on Mental Illness

37:44

posted the table of contents

37:46

of their guide has things like I'm

37:48

having a lot of anxiety because of the coronavirus,

37:51

please help and they have insights

37:53

for that. Or I'm feeling lonely

37:55

and isolated even further, what can I do?

37:58

I don't have health insurance or very their doctor.

38:01

How can I get care? Will absolutely

38:03

share to that, And again I

38:06

think it's also it

38:08

makes connecting with others

38:10

reaching out more important than

38:12

than ever. So

38:16

also on the resource side, Uh,

38:19

there's a lot of sort of great

38:21

things popping up the people are providing, and

38:24

just to share a few of them and please continue

38:26

to share those kinds of things with us.

38:29

Like there's this yoga app that I really enjoy called

38:31

the down Dog App. They're offering completely

38:33

free yoga through the app until

38:35

at least April one. So if

38:37

you need some guidance doing you

38:40

know, a down dog or something

38:42

else, Um, that's great.

38:44

My friend Sarah has a dance studio and

38:46

I like called mob HQ and they're offering

38:49

free dance classes. I watched a hip hop class

38:51

last night. It was very very

38:54

life giving. I mean

38:56

there's even um like social

38:58

choirs pop up. I saw

39:01

one yesterday. I was too late to join, which made

39:03

me very sad. But you know, having

39:06

thirty forty sixty people all join

39:08

from their couch and doing singalongs,

39:11

which are super messy because of the latency,

39:13

the lag time in you know, video chat.

39:15

But it doesn't matter. That's not the point. You're

39:17

getting all these people singing you know, lean

39:20

on me together from their sofas.

39:22

Um. And uh,

39:24

you know, I think there are so many

39:26

resources like that. I know that the twenty four Hour Play

39:29

project has been posting some really great content,

39:32

and Opera is making their you

39:34

know, HD recordings free

39:37

their their site. There there's so

39:39

many, um, I think amazing

39:42

arts and other organizations kind of

39:45

making content available, making

39:47

resources available. So the

39:50

less time you spend scrolling Twitter

39:52

and reading the news quite frankly, and the

39:54

more time you do literally anything

39:56

else, um, the

39:59

better I think you're going to feel. And I say that out

40:01

loud as a reminder to myself. Yeah.

40:03

And I would also say, like on

40:06

the topic of like, do

40:08

not put any

40:10

pressure on yourself to write the next King

40:12

Lear or theory of gravity if

40:15

you are finding that you're spending

40:17

your extra downtime, if you have any at

40:19

all, but if you're spending time

40:21

worrying or scrolling or ruminating,

40:24

um, something that's been helpful for me that I just

40:27

started doing is like I've made a list of

40:29

activities that I could do instead,

40:31

because I think when I'm in a moment of

40:34

just like really ruminating about the state of the world,

40:36

it's hard for me to know think

40:38

of anything else to do, you know, So

40:41

even just like some of these resources that

40:43

we might share, like just putting on your list. Oh,

40:45

I could watch part of an opera. That's

40:47

something I could do. Or I could

40:50

clean the drunk the drunk

40:52

drawer. That's amazing, I could clean

40:54

the drunk drawer. Or

40:59

the more

41:03

my house is as clean as it's ever

41:05

been because I have

41:08

been like Q tipping the

41:10

crumbs out from the toaster.

41:14

Yeah, totally to like. So so maybe

41:17

like have a little running list of This

41:19

is not a to do list. This is just

41:21

an option list. If I find

41:23

myself and it can do room

41:26

in my head, it's a can do list. Yeah,

41:28

and that's not to like, it's

41:31

so easy for overwhelmed, which we

41:33

have talked about on our show episode

41:35

one oh six. Um, it's

41:37

so easy for that to like just

41:40

move itself to different things. So it

41:42

would be very easy to feel overwhelmed

41:44

by like wanting to take advantage of all these free resources

41:46

that are popping up right now. Right.

41:49

This is not that try one at

41:52

the most, like get a C minus

41:55

right now, like pass, but do

41:57

not try to get an A

42:00

anyway pass if you can,

42:02

and you can, we believe in you. I like it.

42:04

I like it. I mean the big

42:06

takeaway right now is to be kind

42:09

to yourself and to others.

42:11

Right everyone is processing this differently, and

42:15

we're all processing it differently

42:17

from one hour to the next. That's right, And

42:19

there's a lot, um there's

42:21

a lot that we don't know still, and that can

42:24

feel I can

42:26

feel really overwhelming. So

42:29

UM, I guess my advice to you is

42:31

drink water and wash your hands

42:33

for twenty seconds all

42:36

the birthday. Please reach out to us

42:39

at any time. We

42:41

we really love to know how

42:43

you're doing, and we'd love to know how you're coping,

42:45

what resources you're finding, helpful, emergency

42:48

funds you've heard about, or just

42:50

send us a quick hello from the social

42:52

distance. UM. As

42:54

always, you can reach us on Twitter or Instagram

42:57

at t l d n E Pod where you

42:59

can eat mel us at Hello at t

43:01

LDNY podcast dot com or if you

43:03

want to use that phone. You can leave us

43:05

a voicemail at eight three three Hi

43:08

t L d n E. That's eight three

43:10

three five three

43:13

six three, and then you'll dial

43:15

eight oh three to get us. YEP. We

43:17

would love to hear your voices, and as

43:19

we mentioned, will link to everything

43:21

that we talked about and ongoing

43:23

things certainly on both of our Instagram

43:26

and Twitter accounts as we move

43:28

forward. You can find all of the links

43:31

to this episode specifically at

43:33

t l DNY podcast dot com

43:35

slash one. Thanks

43:46

so much to our producer Maya Coole and

43:48

to you for tuning in. As always,

43:50

please subscribe, rate, and review on Apple

43:53

Podcasts if you like what you heard. It

43:55

really helps us get the word out to fellow

43:57

human ven diagrams. Until next time,

43:59

remember bur The Limit does

44:02

not exist.

44:08

The Limit does not Exist is a production

44:10

of I Heart Radio. For more podcasts

44:12

from my Heart Radio, visit the i heart Radio

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