Episode Transcript
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0:00
Hello, I'm Hal Lublin. And I'm Mark Gagliardi.
0:03
Since the dawn of humanity, one issue
0:06
has gone unsettled. With the fate of
0:08
the world in the balance, we're here
0:10
to settle once and for all. Queen
0:14
Sleigh? That's
0:18
right, don't worry everyone. We
0:20
got this. Podcasts should have a theme song.
0:22
Podcasts should not have a theme song. Yes
0:24
they should, no they shouldn't, they sound good.
0:27
Yeah, but people are just going to skip
0:29
past it. You know
0:31
what? You're right. We
0:34
got this. Hal,
0:37
we can't have a holiday season without
0:39
a Queen Sleigh episode. And this year,
0:42
why not have two? Right? Why not?
0:44
Let's do it. This is exciting. How
0:47
are you, my friend? I'm doing
0:49
great. I'm in the holiday spirit. That's right,
0:51
I love it. I can see from the- We visit
0:53
the ghosts every night. Really? Are
0:55
they the ghosts of Christmas past, present, and
0:57
future, or just random ghosts? All I know
0:59
is that I'm terrified to sleep and I
1:02
can't find my keys. Hey, you
1:04
know what? There's a ghost out there driving
1:06
your car right now, my friend. Ghostie, you
1:08
can drive my car. Ridiculous.
1:11
Why don't we just jump right in? Yeah. These
1:14
are a bunch of mini topics submitted by you.
1:16
We did, of course, an episode with Paget, which
1:18
we put out around the Thanksgiving holidays, a special
1:20
early present for y'all. Now, you
1:22
gave so many great topics that we
1:24
couldn't possibly fit them all into one
1:26
episode. Here comes more of
1:28
them. That's right. This is your
1:30
fault, people of the world. All right.
1:33
Oh, you read this one because I have questions. Okay.
1:36
This was suggested by Bethany Wells. Thank
1:38
you, Bethany, for the question. Listen, we're
1:41
going to give some advice to the
1:43
big man right now of Christmas, Santa
1:45
Claus. He can take this advice or
1:47
leave it. I don't know why he
1:49
does it differently at different homes, but
1:52
I suppose that some kids like
1:54
to offer up their choices as to what
1:57
they would prefer Santa Claus to do. accommodates
2:00
accordingly. So should
2:03
Santa wrap Christmas
2:06
presents or leave them
2:08
unwrapped and out when he
2:10
arrives, drops off the presents
2:12
and leaves? What do you think? Wrap
2:14
them up? Yeah. I like wrap.
2:16
I mean, it's fun to have that moment
2:19
on Christmas morning of coming downstairs and seeing
2:21
the pile of goodies that Santa has left
2:23
for you. But why not have
2:25
an extra surprise? Right? Yeah.
2:27
If you're going to have one surprise. It's a surprise.
2:29
Tearing it open, you don't quite know what's in there
2:31
but you think you know because you know what you
2:34
asked for. This is the moment of truth where you
2:36
find out if you got it. And it's just like
2:38
fun to rip into wrapping paper. Even at my advanced
2:40
age, I still enjoy it. Yeah.
2:42
Sometimes he'll wrap them inside the
2:44
stocking too. It's a nice mix of
2:46
wrapped and unwrapped. That I don't do. You
2:48
don't like to see the... Santa's going to bring me some
2:50
stuff and put it in the... That's the stocking, it's the
2:52
wrapping for that because I can't see what it is. Then
2:54
I can like sort of reach in and feel
2:56
like, oh, what if this feels like peanut M&M's?
2:59
Oh, Santa knows me so well. But
3:01
if it's under the tree, wrap it
3:03
up. I'd like to
3:05
see Santa wrap things that are so...
3:07
It's so obvious what they are. Like
3:10
a bicycle... A Christmas... Yeah.
3:12
Guitar, bicycle, skis, a bowling ball
3:15
which is just wrapped around with
3:17
three holes poked in it. I
3:20
don't know why you have to poke the three
3:22
holes. That kind of just gives it away. But
3:24
yeah, for this one Bethany, I hope that when
3:26
Santa comes and drops off presents at your home
3:28
this holiday season, those presents are wrapped so you
3:30
get the double dose of surprise and joy. That's
3:33
right. Asked and answered.
3:36
Asked and answered. Chris Rooney asks,
3:38
wood fireplace, gas fireplace, or you'll
3:41
log on TV. Can I tell
3:43
you Mark, in our home, we
3:45
have a gas fireplace. Yeah. We
3:47
had the gas company out within the first six
3:50
months we were here. Like 4th of July, a bunch
3:52
of fireworks went off and it sets... You
3:54
know that like gas lines, there's a little trip box,
3:56
a little plastic cube with a marble in
3:58
it. Marble goes in the hole. if it gets
4:00
shaken and it shuts off the gas. So
4:03
they had to reset those and
4:05
the guy was checking stuff inside. He's like,
4:07
do you use the Spyroquist? He said, no, we never have. He
4:10
said, if you want us to turn it on, we'll come service
4:12
it for you. It's something we do. And
4:14
then you can use it whenever you want. We've never
4:16
one time used it. Never used it ever. Well,
4:20
you should use it. First of all, did you say
4:22
yes to that question? I said, thank you for letting
4:24
me know. Oh, you did. So they didn't actually set
4:26
it up for you. No, it would have to be
4:28
like a whole separate thing, but we have. Oh, I
4:30
see. That's the whole thing. We've not done that, but
4:32
I love a fireplace fireplace. Yeah. I
4:34
love, love, love a wood fireplace because
4:37
there's so much at the way it
4:39
smells is great. The, I feel like
4:41
the trade-off between a wood fireplace and
4:43
a gas fireplace is that the gas
4:45
is easier. You just turn it on
4:47
and your fire comes on and cleaner,
4:49
easier and cleaner. Yeah. Easy. Oh, I
4:51
meant easier for both you, the worker
4:53
of the fire, the fire stoker, and
4:55
also easier on the environment. Sure. Potentially.
4:58
Depends on how much gas you're using. If
5:00
you're just going bonfire style. Yeah. You're running
5:03
it just for three months straight during the
5:05
winter. That's bad. Don't do that. But
5:07
between the two fireplaces, yeah, there's something sort
5:09
of magical. Not sort of magical. There's
5:12
something really magical about a wood fireplace. It's what
5:14
I grew up on during the holidays. I know
5:16
I've told this before. We frequently would go up
5:18
to Gatlinburg and rent a cabin for a couple
5:20
of days up there. And, uh, when we would
5:23
go up, we would always have a fireplace going.
5:25
It was always one of the kids job to
5:27
keep the fire going, which
5:29
is, I guess, an odd job for a kid
5:31
to have. Hey kid, make sure you keep this
5:33
fire going the whole time. I don't care if
5:35
that log is too big to carry. Just roll
5:37
it in. Get your hand in there.
5:39
Get it up there. Put it in. No, no, no.
5:42
It's not going to hurt you. It's not going to
5:44
hurt you, you big baby. Take that fire stoker. Yeah.
5:46
That big pointy stick. You're sick. You can handle it.
5:48
Now poke around in this fire. What did the hypnotherapist
5:50
say when they heard that? What's that?
5:53
What did the hypnotherapist say when they heard you say that?
5:56
Uh, you know, I've been
5:59
going to a regular. therapist. I haven't been
6:01
going to a hypnotherapist, Hal. They
6:03
should. But maybe I should start going to a
6:05
hypnotherapist. The thing is, I tried it, but looking
6:08
at that watch I kept getting very sleepy and
6:10
then not remembering anything that I did for an
6:12
hour. Mmm, that's
6:14
right. Are you a fan of the
6:16
Yule Log on TV? Yeah,
6:19
they're fun. I don't have a fireplace.
6:22
So that I frequently will just turn
6:24
on and have that be my televised
6:26
fireplace. But you and I both have
6:28
televisions high up on the wall. Yeah. Like,
6:31
you have yours a nice height, mine's higher, a little higher on
6:33
the wall than yours. Yeah. It is weird
6:35
to have like a suspended fireplace above your head.
6:37
I'll tell you what I did. I took a
6:39
little TV, like a little monitor last year and
6:42
I had it on the floor in front of
6:44
there. So I had the TV, but also on
6:46
the floor I had a little TV monitor. I
6:48
only used it as a fireplace. Perfect.
6:51
Which is ridiculous. You've also no doubt seen,
6:54
and I hope that everyone out there has
6:56
seen the Darth Vader Yule Log. Yeah.
6:58
You're familiar with this? I've done it before.
7:00
Yeah. It's a great, it's like a four
7:03
hour loop. You can find it on YouTube.
7:05
It's just a loop of that shot of
7:07
Darth Vader in his funeral pyre. Yeah. Which
7:10
makes a wonderful Yule Log. But
7:12
the winner of this from Chris Rooney, Wood
7:15
fireplace, gas fireplace or Yule Log
7:17
on TV, without a doubt, Wood
7:20
fireplace. Asked and answered.
7:22
Thank you. Okay. Timothy Bailey asks,
7:24
what's up Timothy? Star Trek ornaments
7:26
or Star Wars ornaments? I mean,
7:28
this is just a, which of
7:30
these franchises are you a bigger
7:32
fan of? Right? I
7:34
mean, there are some really good animated
7:37
ornaments. Ken shared one with me
7:39
that I did not buy. That's
7:42
like $70. And it's the carbonite
7:44
freezing chamber on Bespin
7:46
from Empire Strikes Back. And
7:48
it's got everybody there and Han
7:50
is in, he's in his restraints. So
7:53
you press a button and it lights up and
7:55
it plays the entire scene. Chewy,
8:00
Chewy, you got to take care
8:02
of her now. I'll be alright. All
8:05
the way through, I love you, I know that too,
8:07
he's worth a lot, you know, are you sure he's
8:09
gonna survive? He's worth a lot to me. You'll be
8:11
compensated. And then, you know,
8:13
the music plays and you hear the sound,
8:16
all the sound effects and the
8:18
Han lowers into the middle of
8:20
the ornament and
8:23
then the lights change when you hear the switch of
8:26
the carbonite process and then up comes
8:30
on soloing carbonite and it
8:32
goes all the way to... Can
8:37
I ask you a question Hal? Unreal.
8:41
What does this thing remotely have to
8:43
do with Christmas? What
8:46
does the Darth Vader wrap on my tree have to do with Christmas?
8:50
I know but that's... Look, I
8:52
feel like that particular ornament is
8:54
asking a lot. That is
8:56
like, hey, do you like looking at the
8:58
tree? How about looking at one ornament on
9:01
the tree that has nothing to do with
9:03
Christmas for the next four minutes straight? Think
9:06
of the number of ornaments that you have, including
9:08
our work-to-sim-prov ornament that we all have. Yeah, the
9:11
best. That has nothing to do with Christmas, it's
9:13
just a reminder of work-to-sim-prov and we can hang
9:15
it on the tree, it's in the shape of
9:17
an ornament. I think there are better reminders of
9:19
that entire scene. I have a
9:21
Wall-E in Eve where they're dancing, where he's
9:24
got the fire extinguisher so he can fly
9:26
with her. I do love
9:28
that. Look, I love motion picture moments
9:30
depicted in ornament form. I
9:32
think it's great. Yes, it's the time to enjoy
9:35
the things that you enjoy. That
9:37
ornament sounds hilariously over the
9:39
top and wonderful and way
9:41
zero percent Christmasy but you're right,
9:44
who cares? I do have one
9:46
Star Trek ornament from growing up
9:48
that would lend me toward thinking
9:50
that Star Trek would be
9:52
the winner of this specifically because at
9:54
least their ornament pays lip service to
9:56
the season. And if this is of
9:59
course the famous shuttlecraft ornament i
10:01
believe it was a hallmark ornament
10:03
when you press the button. Boxes
10:06
shuttlecraft enterprise shuttlecraft
10:08
enterprise spot here
10:10
happy holidays live long and
10:12
prosper that actually let me know your voice match
10:15
i don't know i might have been a voice match. Either
10:17
way the idea that leonard neem way
10:20
would send a message back to the
10:22
enterprise just cuz he forgot to wish
10:24
them happy holidays when he got in
10:26
the shuttlecraft is like i
10:29
forgot something. Hold on
10:31
shuttlecraft enterprise quick quick
10:33
thing we forgot this yes yes everything
10:35
okay yes it's totally fine just wanted
10:37
to say happy holidays. I love
10:40
that i was like the sentiment behind that
10:42
scene i would argue that
10:44
scene is more my
10:46
favorite holiday scene than on solo
10:48
getting frozen in carbonite in its
10:50
entirety leonard neem way forgetting to
10:52
say happy holidays to those still
10:54
aboard the enterprise. Listen i
10:56
love that i think it's great i don't
10:59
does anything to be when i tell you
11:01
mark that my job was on the ground.
11:04
Watching that it exists and like all
11:06
i can think was one
11:08
day i will get this and it will hang on my
11:10
tree like i have to get this point in my life
11:12
i will find it i will get it hang
11:14
on my tree i have yet to see any
11:16
star trek ornament that can top that. That
11:19
is why i would say movie scene. Wait
11:23
wait it's look i
11:25
don't understand all the movie you don't know
11:27
you haven't seen it so
11:29
we're basing this look this is the
11:31
question that can be mainly asked to
11:33
star trek ornaments or star wars ornaments
11:36
not one specific ornaments or maybe we
11:38
need to step away from it being
11:40
that one specific ornament okay i with
11:42
my sentimental version of that one famous
11:44
scene where spot says happy holidays to
11:47
those aboard the enterprise and
11:49
you with. The elaborate
11:51
full scene version of
11:53
the carbonite in
11:55
general. Star trek
11:58
comes from a universe. where
12:00
christmas exist but star wars comes from
12:02
universe where life day exists and actually
12:04
they have the special they had a
12:07
number of special now they have the
12:09
lego special which are cute but nothing
12:11
be that original nineteen seventy nine special
12:13
that's just pure garbage i'm gonna give
12:15
it to star wars i
12:17
just think it's there's more fun to be had
12:19
there. Yeah yeah i'm
12:22
down for giving it to star wars and it might
12:24
be pushed over by the fact that can just send
12:26
us a picture of the death
12:28
of spark immortalized in ornament form when
12:30
he calls kirk is best friend or
12:32
his friend i am and always shall
12:34
be your friend from ratha khan i
12:36
also would accept. From
12:39
star truck three click on bastard to kill my
12:41
son and him like
12:43
a full scene of him and scottie
12:45
putting in the self destruct sequence in
12:47
the original enterprise with dark moments getting
12:50
turned into can't we just have like
12:52
the throne room scene just everybody wearing
12:54
medals and smiling silver and gold man.
12:57
I need it all the way through him
12:59
saying the christopher loyds character like. We
13:01
just need one better to go i'll give two
13:04
minutes to you when you're valiant crew and then
13:06
he uses that to destroy the enterprise and switch
13:08
them aboard except that christopher loyds went up in
13:10
the service of the fight on the other one
13:13
will be any scene from star trek five. I
13:16
think with five box like we're trying to
13:19
merge with chakari. How
13:22
i cannot wait to come over and
13:24
see the cornucopia of your trees gonna
13:26
look like a comic con your whole
13:28
tree is just gonna be a comic
13:31
con. Yeah which i'm here for
13:33
i'm a hundred percent here for it but
13:35
yeah i think star wars life day pushes
13:37
star wars over the edge and
13:40
the death of spark ornament pushes star trek
13:42
into the abyss. Yeah
13:45
i think it's star wars ornaments
13:48
and answered what is next. EJ
13:51
salads are brian the turkey or not and
13:53
if brian should be a wet brian or
13:55
dry brian i can answer this. I
13:58
believe we have the first of all absolutely prime. a
14:00
turkey. A hundred percent brine the turkey. And
14:02
wet brine the turkey specifically. It's so juicy. It's
14:04
so juicy. Don't do what I did and not
14:06
make the brine beforehand and put it in the
14:08
bag. What I did was fill a bag with
14:10
water, put a turkey in it and then add
14:13
salt and peppercorns. What like you're a
14:15
like you're like you're
14:17
a witch that's cooking Bugs Bunny. Like
14:20
you're cutting up a carrot individually right
14:22
into the thing, directly over the top.
14:24
And then at the end, one last
14:26
little pinch from witch Hazel of something.
14:29
Yeah, yeah. EJ, this is an easy
14:31
one. First of all, hello, EJ. Hi,
14:33
EJ. Brine the turkey and
14:35
wet brine that turkey. Oh, it's so good.
14:37
How did you do your turkey for Thanksgiving
14:39
this year? We did a ham. Oh,
14:41
you did a ham. Did a ham. Yeah,
14:43
I got bubble guts on Monday from eating leftovers.
14:46
Did you get bubble guts from leftovers? No, I
14:48
didn't. I didn't have many leftovers because I traveled.
14:50
I traveled. So I came back. We did
14:52
Trader Joe's and it's already cooked and you heat
14:54
it up but it tells you what temperature it's
14:57
supposed to be because they're like just
14:59
a 275 for like two hours. This
15:02
is for four and a half pound ham. It's the smallest one
15:04
they sold. It did not
15:06
come to temperature. It took forever to get it
15:08
to come to temperature. I'm sitting there checking the
15:11
temperature religiously and then this packet of glaze that
15:13
comes with it, I make the glaze
15:15
and I'm smelling it. I'm like,
15:17
it smells terrible. And then I'm like, Jennifer, come smell
15:19
this and tell me if you think we should put
15:22
this on the ham. And she's like, no. So we
15:24
threw that crap out. So what'd you do? Just
15:26
maple syrup or something on top? No, just had some ham. Hey,
15:29
man. Nothing wrong with that. Just have a little ham.
15:32
Ham. Well, if you're having
15:34
a ham, enjoy your ham. If you're having
15:36
a turkey, wet brine it. What's our next
15:38
topic? Ken Plume. All right. Dina,
15:41
I hope I'm saying that
15:43
right. Dina McIntosh says, best month
15:45
to begin to drink eggnog.
15:48
I'm not going to lie, Dina, I have
15:51
already started drinking eggnog.
15:54
And we went to the grocery store the other day.
15:56
The eggnog wall. They have an eggnog wall.
15:58
The whole eggnog wall. Eggnog wall was
16:01
almost empty. Oh, wow. We
16:03
had to get lactaid eggnog. Lactaid,
16:05
Hal. That's,
16:07
we're only lactaid in this house. Oh,
16:09
that's fair. I like the almond milk eggnog.
16:11
We are currently, by the way, we are
16:14
currently in November. Recording this just
16:16
barely. It is the end of November.
16:19
I think I got my first eggnog
16:21
of the season. It might've been October.
16:23
Really? Yeah. I like eggnog a lot.
16:26
I got a carton of just a quart
16:28
carton of the Southern Comfort brand eggnog, no
16:30
booze in it. Just Southern Comfort
16:32
makes an eggnog because Southern Comfort goes well
16:34
with eggnog. It makes sense much
16:36
in the same way that Jose Cuervo makes a
16:38
margarita mix. That you just add
16:40
Cuervo. This is eggnog, just add SoCo,
16:43
but I like it by itself. You
16:45
know where eggnog is great? Pancakes. Oh
16:48
yeah. Use that instead of milk and
16:50
pancakes. Highly recommend. What about French toast? French
16:52
toast would be great for French toast. What
16:54
about a waffle? Sure. What
16:57
about scrambled eggs? Maybe not scrambled eggs. What
16:59
about crispy wheat and raisins? Crispy
17:01
wheat and raisins. Oh, wasn't that it? That
17:03
was a cereal that they used to have
17:05
in the eighties and they had a commercial. It
17:08
was like crispy wheat and
17:10
raisins. Yeah. That's what my grandma said. I
17:12
vaguely remember that. Oh my God. Come
17:14
on, mom. You can't spring for the raisin
17:16
brand. There's the sugar on it. I actually
17:19
like crispy, crispy wheat raisins. This is good.
17:21
I don't know why it went away. Probably
17:23
because it wasn't raisin bran. Yeah. It was
17:25
just a thing that was pretending to be
17:27
raisin bran. That's why it went away. Like
17:29
nice try. I know you're not raisin bran.
17:31
You can't fool me, crispy wheat and raisins.
17:33
Now, if you wanted to get me something
17:35
called crispy raisins, now I'm interested. I have
17:38
lots of questions, but I'm interested. What is
17:40
a crispy raisin? How do you crisp a
17:42
raisin up? Is it one of those singing
17:44
raisins that sang I heard it through the grapevine?
17:47
Is that what happened to them? That's what happened
17:49
to them. They all got turned into crispy raisins.
17:51
Hey, after this gig, I'm going to get crisped
17:54
up, but I just want to say it was
17:56
really fun gigging with y'all. Oh, yeah. I heard
17:58
the almond grape. No, no. Noooooo!
18:02
Ahhhhhh! I think the
18:04
best month to begin to drink eggnog is
18:06
November. Do it the day that Thanksgiving ends.
18:08
You're okay from there. You maximize
18:10
your eggnog drinking time. What do you think, Hal?
18:13
Seconded. I don't drink eggnog. I
18:15
was going to go with whatever you said. Surprise! Haha!
18:19
I like eggnog. Almond milk eggnog, a little bit lighter. Yeah.
18:22
Delightful. Alright. What
18:25
is next, Ken Plume? Next. Alright, this
18:27
is the last question. Before the break,
18:29
Chris Rooney asked, best toy from the
18:31
island of misfit toys. Isn't there
18:34
a weird Jack in the Box? Here's
18:36
the thing. I think there's definitely the
18:38
funniest one who has the job as
18:40
herald of the island. And
18:42
that is Charlie in the
18:44
Box. Charlie in the Box. He is
18:46
a Jack in the Box who is
18:48
named Charlie and that's what got him
18:50
sent to the island of misfit toys.
18:53
Maybe instead of going to the island
18:55
of misfit toys, he could have just
18:57
gone to the courthouse and changed his
19:00
name to Jack. Then
19:03
he would be just like all the other
19:05
Jacks in the Box. Oh.
19:07
But no, he was like, well, my
19:09
name's Charlie. There's literally nothing to do
19:11
to change your name or just go
19:13
by Jack. My name is Charlie,
19:16
but my friends call me Jack because I'm
19:18
in a box. So I get why they
19:20
call me that. It's
19:22
not difficult, but I want to bring up
19:25
what toys there are on that list. So
19:28
there are 14 toys
19:30
on the island of misfit toys. Hal,
19:32
tell me which one of these stands
19:34
out. One is a scooter. Nothing
19:37
weird about that. Airplane. Nothing out of
19:39
the ordinary. The dolly for Sue, who
19:41
is capable of saying, how do you
19:43
do? I don't know
19:45
what makes her a misfit because she looks
19:48
perfectly normal on the outside. But I think
19:50
that that might be the case
19:52
for a lot of misfits. There's a cowboy. Oh,
19:54
man. This is also a pretty good one. A
19:57
cowboy who rides an ostrich. The
19:59
cowboy who rides. an ostrich is pretty
20:01
funny. An elephant with spots, that's nothing.
20:04
No, he's wearing a cowboy hat. Looks like
20:06
a bowler to me. The train with square
20:08
wheels. That seems like you're a misfit, but
20:10
you're also you physically cannot function and do
20:13
your job. Like Charlie in the Box can
20:15
do his job. There's a Matryoshka
20:17
doll with a mouse inside it. A blue bear
20:19
with feathers, which actually sounds kind of cool. A
20:22
bird that swims instead of flying, which
20:25
seems awesome. Also sounds cool. I
20:28
would say that my vote either goes to Charlie
20:30
in the Box or the
20:32
cowboy who rides an ostrich. I think Charlie in
20:34
the Box because his greatest defense is having the
20:36
wrong name. That is
20:38
an easy fix, Charlie in the Box. That
20:41
is some bottom of the barrel stuff right
20:43
there. There you go.
20:45
Charlie in the Box asked and answered.
20:47
Let's take a quick break. You
20:50
and I had the same idea that Ken texted
20:52
us. Why don't we take a quick
20:54
break and when we come
20:56
back, we will continue to clean out
20:59
this sleigh. How this sleigh is a
21:01
mess. I'll get the hose. We'll
21:03
be right back. Hello,
21:06
sleepyheads. Sleeping with
21:08
Celebrities is your podcast pillow pal.
21:12
We talk to remarkable people about
21:14
unremarkable topics, all to help
21:16
you slow down your brain and drift off
21:18
to sleep. For instance, we have
21:20
the remarkable Neil Gaiman. I'd
21:23
always had a vague
21:25
interest in life, culture,
21:27
food preparation. Sleeping
21:30
with Celebrities, hosted by me, John
21:32
Moe, on maximumfun.org
21:35
or wherever you get your podcasts. Night,
21:38
night. Somewhere
21:42
in an alternate universe where
21:44
Hollywood is smarter. And
21:47
the Emmy nominees for Outstanding
21:49
Comedy Series are Jet
21:52
Pacula Airport
21:54
Marriott Ruppel Dear
21:57
America, We've Seen You Naked and
22:01
Allah in the family. All
22:25
right, we are back. What is
22:27
our next topic? Oh, this is
22:29
from Kate McManus. Hello, researcher
22:31
Kate McManus. Interesting. To
22:34
re-gift or not to re-gift?
22:36
Ooh, it depends on who gave it
22:38
to you. Yeah, I
22:40
think that's true. I think re-gifting. Yeah,
22:45
it's, there's a certain
22:47
cutoff point of relationship.
22:50
You know what I mean? And
22:52
if they're beyond that point
22:55
in relationship, keep the gift. If they're
22:57
before that point, I think it's okay
22:59
to re-gift as long as the person
23:01
you are re-gifting to is in no
23:03
way associated with the other person, as
23:05
long as the Venn diagrams don't overlap.
23:08
You know, you also
23:10
shouldn't hold on to something you're not going to
23:12
use just because you feel bad. I
23:14
think it's worth some open communication, but also you
23:16
could donate it. Donate, yeah.
23:19
Hang on to it for a little while. It's not that big, like
23:21
hold on to it for a little while and then you can get
23:23
rid of it. Yeah. I
23:25
think re-gifting is risky,
23:28
unless you're giving it to someone in a completely
23:30
different social circle. Yeah, that's the thing. If it
23:32
is an obligatory office secret
23:34
Santa gift and then a
23:37
white elephant party from a totally different
23:39
group of people that you know peripherally.
23:42
Yeah, you can give that away. You know what I mean?
23:44
That's a, if it's an
23:46
obligatory gift, I think a re-gifting is fine.
23:48
If it is meant to be a thoughtful
23:50
gift, then maybe don't. To
23:53
err on the safe side. That said,
23:56
we also don't know the financial situation
23:58
of everyone involved in this. whole process.
24:00
If re-gifting is going to save
24:02
critical bucks at the holiday season
24:05
for you, then yeah, it's a
24:07
time when people wind up spending a lot more money than
24:09
they want to maybe figure out a
24:11
way to make it a personal thing. And, you
24:13
know, if I receive a gift that I know
24:16
you are really going to love, but
24:18
I have no real need for, I
24:20
guess my thought becomes it's okay as
24:23
long as there is some thoughtfulness
24:25
to it. There's thoughtfulness as to
24:27
whether or not to re-gift. There's
24:29
thoughtfulness to how to re-gift. And
24:32
there's thoughtfulness about to whom the gifts
24:34
are going. But generally
24:37
speaking... Don't do it. Generally
24:39
speaking, I say, yeah, maybe donating is
24:41
better if it's not something that you're...
24:44
That's right. Don't re-gift. Don't
24:46
re-gift. Ask and answer.
24:48
Ask and answer. Or answer.
24:50
And also answer. All right.
24:52
Another person of the world,
24:54
spectacular Leslie Trautman asks, stay
24:57
up late or get up early? Is this just
24:59
in general or is this like on Christmas Eve?
25:02
I wish I could... It
25:04
is a clean slate. This is Christmas Eve. I wish by
25:07
pray that I could wake
25:09
up late, stay up
25:11
late. I don't have that capacity anymore. I get
25:14
tired at 8 p.m. and then
25:16
wake up at 5 a.m. and
25:18
I can't stop it. I'm caught in a cycle,
25:20
Mark, that I cannot stop. I don't need to
25:22
get up at 5 a.m. There's no need. I
25:24
could comfortably wake up at 8 a.m. because I
25:26
work at home and be at work at 8.30, which
25:29
is my preferred time to start work for the day. But
25:32
I don't know how. I
25:35
don't know what to do and I'm exhausted, man.
25:37
I'm exhausted getting even eight or nine hours of
25:40
sleep. I can't stay up. Well,
25:44
listen, I've got things that'll help. Oh,
25:47
do you? Yeah. I had a monster
25:49
energy drink just a couple hours ago.
25:52
Oh, too much touring.
25:57
Yeah, this is tough because I love
25:59
Christmas. Eve and I
26:01
love Christmas morning. But
26:03
I don't want to rush through Christmas Eve because I
26:06
love Christmas morning and I want to get to it
26:08
faster. I think a lot of it depends on whether
26:10
there are kids involved and you have kids in the
26:13
house. If there are kids involved, go
26:15
to bed early on Christmas Eve because they're going
26:17
to wake up crazy early on Christmas Day and
26:20
you want to have gotten a little sleep before that. I
26:23
love the anticipation of Christmas morning. Here's the
26:25
thing. I don't know how this is than
26:27
either or because for me
26:29
frequently I stay up late on Christmas
26:31
Eve watching a movie, having eggnog and
26:33
also I get up early on Christmas
26:35
morning. So the answer is yes. So
26:38
the answer to stay up late or get up
26:40
early is yes. Yes.
26:43
Ask an answer. Yeah. I
26:46
don't think you need that. It's Christmas. You're going
26:48
to nap in the afternoon anyway. You don't
26:50
need your full eight hours. Yeah. And
26:53
then I say Salazar's back asking, is
26:55
apple cider better warm or cold, spiced
26:57
or not spiced? I am as
26:59
you know, Mark, a world famous lover of the
27:01
apple juice. Love it. Love it so
27:03
much. Not a fan of the apple
27:05
cider. A little, a little, it tastes like
27:07
something's happened to the apple juice. But I
27:10
do love getting a bottle of
27:13
apple cider off the shelf at TJ's. Get
27:16
that, bring it home. And then I put
27:18
it in a pot with a bag of mulling
27:20
spices. And then TJ gets home
27:22
and is like where, I'm assuming you're talking about
27:24
TJ Fowler from my middle school. TJ gets home
27:26
and is like, hey, I had this bottle of
27:29
apple cider. What's happening? And
27:31
then I was like, it's my apple cider now. And then
27:33
I punch him in the throat. Wow. I
27:36
love the smell of it. It's just, there's
27:38
something very like just fall about it. Not
27:40
even holidays for me, but like, hey, it's
27:42
September, October. It's chilly somewhere, a
27:44
hundred degrees where I live, but it's chilly
27:46
somewhere. And it
27:48
just makes it feel, I think,
27:50
warm and spiced. That would be
27:52
me. Yeah. I look, I love
27:54
chilled apple cider. I've had apple
27:56
cider. We went to a pumpkin
27:58
apple picking harvest thing. in
28:00
Fairfax, Virginia and they had cold apple cider
28:02
there straight out of the tap and it
28:04
was great. That said, I
28:08
can get a bottle of apple
28:10
cider cold at the grocery store.
28:12
There's something that makes it special
28:14
when it's spiced with cinnamon, nutmeg,
28:16
and warmed up. Then it
28:18
becomes a communal thing. It becomes an
28:20
event. It becomes, or just for yourself,
28:22
a moment to sit down and have
28:24
something special. I think that's what makes
28:26
it special and I think the holiday season is special
28:28
and that's why I'm with you on that. I think
28:30
warm and spiced is the best way to have your
28:32
apple cider. Asks and answered. What
28:34
did you say, Hal? Sorry, I didn't mean to cut you
28:37
off. I said, yes, queen. Oh. What's
28:39
next? All right. Jason Gottsall.
28:42
Gottsall? What's up, Jason? Asks,
28:45
fruit pie, best served
28:47
warm or cold. Is a
28:49
pumpkin a fruit? Yeah, you
28:51
serve cold, you know, instead of that warm. Right?
28:55
I mean, I've had it warm because we had
28:57
it homemade. So it was like straight out
28:59
of the... Yeah, has it cooled off? I
29:01
mean, there's something kind of... It's interesting. This
29:04
doesn't necessarily... I don't necessarily have a
29:06
lot of fruit pies during
29:08
the holidays. You know what I mean? I
29:11
do. Apple pie at the beginning of
29:13
the fall, but the holidays to me and where
29:15
I grew up, it was more about pumpkin pie
29:17
and for us specifically, pecan pie. Pecan
29:19
pie was the big, big deal for us.
29:22
Always warm for us, pecan pie. If you're
29:24
having pie warm, any pie, you're not putting
29:26
ice cream on it, you're wasting my time,
29:29
Mark's time, everybody's listening
29:31
time, most importantly, your time. And if you
29:33
have trouble with dairy, there are options. Yeah.
29:37
So I want to hear it. That said, I
29:39
feel like by and large at like a
29:41
Thanksgiving dinner around the holidays tends to
29:43
be cold. Yeah. Not
29:45
a hot pie that we're having generally. I will defer
29:47
more to you on this one because I'm not... Again,
29:49
I don't have a ton of fruit pie around the
29:51
holidays. I am warm pecan
29:53
pie all the way. We
29:55
did a pumpkin pie and a cherry pie. And...
30:00
I do love Cherry Pie. Yeah. You
30:02
to let it cool or of you will hurt
30:04
yourself and I take it for me. This
30:07
was injured himself. With that been going
30:09
to wait. Will. Also you
30:12
got it for a cherry pie. You gotta
30:14
wait so that for it's structural stability as
30:16
well. that's right. Yeah I mean if you've
30:18
made a cherry pie and you take a
30:20
ride my billie of and you're like oh
30:22
I'm going to eat as above I do.
30:24
How many this right now? Well guess what
30:26
you're about to have a fruit soup with
30:28
cinnamon dust. The. Or if it's a
30:30
good. If it's a good
30:32
fruit pie, I think cold. And
30:35
I'm and assume you're not serious of garbage as I
30:37
believe in you. Know. Of cold asked
30:40
and answered. Food and boxing aren't yeah?
30:42
Warm your apple cider? Cold pie? You
30:44
know when cold pie is really good.
30:47
Ah, For. accessed. Oh.
30:49
Yeah, there's a Christmas season I'm off from
30:51
school for a week. I'm a have a
30:53
slice of cherry pie for breakfast today. That.
30:56
If I enjoy all, I love
30:58
this one. Is a big
31:00
one. Everyone gets The Popcorn Factory
31:02
try Flavored thin yeah now Mccord.
31:05
It has center popcorn and it
31:07
as butter popcorn. Emily's asking
31:09
what is the best of the three popcorn tin flavors?
31:11
I know the one I would pick. What would you.
31:14
Okay of the three
31:16
Popcorn Tim flavors. Yeah
31:19
as. A person who lived in Chicago
31:21
for college. My favorite thing to do is
31:23
to mix the caramel and the cheddar cheese
31:25
popcorn, right? Yeah, the butter popcorn nobody likes.
31:28
Not nuggets. I guarantee you not going to
31:30
be the butter popcorn. That's butter. popcorn is
31:32
fine, but my point is better when it's
31:34
just been popped. Yeah, this is a two
31:37
way race of the three popcorn ten flavors.
31:39
Yeah. I've a special affinity for camel corn
31:41
because I hadn't a lot as a kid. And
31:44
like the Ocean City Boardwalk Atlantic City Boardwalk you
31:46
yeah Johnson's caramel corn thought they were. you get
31:48
oh interesting I don't think of of I'm have
31:50
a saw it recently made caramel corn. If we're
31:52
ever done the Jersey Shore together I will. Alumni
31:55
snacking tour. Who. the ocean
31:57
city boardwalk deal worth it i don't know
31:59
the church Part of me, the cheddar popcorn
32:01
is great. It's so good. It's
32:03
so good. And also, there's, I keep
32:06
coming back to the seasonality
32:09
of it. You know what I mean? Like,
32:12
I don't want it to be just, this
32:14
question Emily asked, best of the three popcorn
32:17
tin flavors. But I'm wondering
32:19
if we need to add into that and
32:21
include it within our best, the most
32:24
holiday centric of the
32:26
three, because I can get great caramel
32:28
corn year round. I don't see the
32:30
cheddar popcorn as often year round. You
32:32
know what I mean? Like, I'm not
32:34
going to, a cracker Jack's in the
32:37
summertime, the caramel popcorn is great with
32:39
baseball, you know? So there's lots
32:41
of different times of year that that
32:43
is out there. But I think that the
32:45
cheddar popcorn specifically makes me think of the
32:47
holiday. Now, does that necessarily make it the
32:49
best one? No. And
32:52
do you have that added edge of being
32:54
the Christmase-iest of them? Yeah, I'll go with
32:56
that. I'll go with the cheddar popcorn. Now
32:58
have you ever, not to cut
33:00
off the asked and answered of this, have
33:02
you ever gone full rogue and
33:04
just opened up that popcorn
33:06
tin and pulled that little
33:08
triceporation cardboard out? No,
33:12
but I mean, like I would, I just don't
33:14
want the butter popcorn. Yeah,
33:17
get out of your butter popcorn. In between, I would
33:19
pull that in a second, no problem. Yeah, in a
33:21
world where both of them, this is tough though, I'm
33:23
not going to throw another wrench in it. I
33:25
think that the, I love the cheddar popcorn and
33:27
it does make me think more of the holidays.
33:29
Yeah. But if my hand
33:31
is just reaching in, just purely just
33:34
reaching in for the snack, I
33:37
think maybe six out of 10 times
33:39
I'd reach for the caramel corn. Well,
33:42
then I think that's our answer. Ah,
33:44
it's caramel corn. It's not as Christmassy as the cheddar one.
33:47
That's an answer. Wait, wait, wait, hold on. I did. I
33:50
haven't answered both the cheddar and the caramel. It's a clean slate.
33:52
I didn't say I have to answer it on cheddar, did I?
33:55
No, you were about to and then I kept
33:57
going. Haha, that's because you wanted it to happen
33:59
on... Caramel Corn and it has. You're
34:01
welcome. Yeah, I think it's the caramel.
34:03
Also because caramel is a flavor of the holidays. There
34:07
you go. All right. One more.
34:09
Okay, this is our final question from
34:13
Timothy Bailey. And the final question is, oh, this
34:15
is gonna be a doozy. Ken is really, uh,
34:17
oh, get out of here. This feels like a
34:19
joke. The Holly
34:21
or the Ivy? The Holly
34:24
or the Ivy. Okay.
34:26
Uh, first of all, the Ivy league is
34:29
a scam. It should be banned. All of
34:31
that. What is this? The Ivy
34:33
league schools are all one big scam.
34:35
They all have endowments that are bigger
34:37
than the budget of most nations, but
34:39
they won't allow any more people in
34:41
because the scarcity lets them stay expensive.
34:44
They could educate so many more people
34:46
with the endowments that they have, but
34:48
they really only want to save their
34:50
money so that they can outlast this
34:52
government if our government should ever fall.
34:54
And Holly is those delightful berries and
34:57
little sprig that you put in your
34:59
hat. This one's a no brainer. It's
35:01
the Holly. Did you
35:03
know that if you go early acceptance to
35:05
any Ivy league school and they offer it
35:07
to you, you have to take it. You
35:10
cannot. Of course you do. And if you turn it down,
35:12
if you turn it down and you've applied to any other
35:14
Ivy league schools, they will not accept you. It's
35:17
an agreement amongst those schools. This is true. Yeah.
35:20
And also the whole legacy thing. Get
35:22
rid of the legacy thing. The legacy
35:24
thing is stupid and it's a dumb
35:26
way to gatekeep middle-class people out of
35:29
your school. We're not decking the halls
35:31
with boughs of Ivy. Yeah. Yeah. The
35:33
Ivy is secondary. The Ivy is ancillary
35:35
and only exists for purposes of this
35:37
song to have a second thing to
35:39
talk about. So it's not just the
35:41
Holly, just the Holly when it was
35:43
just full grown. Yeah. And
35:46
listen, of all the trees that are in
35:48
the wood, the Holly bears the crown. Not
35:50
the Ivy, the Holly. There
35:53
you go. There it is. Asked and
35:55
answered. It's the Holly. Take that Ivy. Sorry
35:57
for going on another Ivy league school. They're
36:00
at the end. You're good. That took a
36:02
turn that I did not expect. Let's get one more. I
36:04
want one more. I
36:07
want a palate cleanser after that. One
36:09
more, a bonus one. With much love to
36:11
Timothy Bailey. Yeah, we're going to end it
36:13
on another one. It's coming. I
36:16
see the ticker tape. Chris Rooney, is Rudolph a
36:18
mutant? In like
36:20
the X-Men sense? I mean,
36:22
this is a genetic mutation that would cause
36:24
his nose to glow. Sure. Is
36:26
he a mutant in the sense? No, he's not a mutant. I'm
36:28
curious why, because most mutants, their powers
36:31
don't manifest until they reach puberty. He has a
36:33
glowing nose right away, long before he reaches any
36:35
kind of maturity. Asked and answered. Asked
36:38
and answered. Genetically a mutant, X-Men,
36:40
not a mutant. Unless the North Poles
36:42
are like Krakow or Krakow. That's what
36:45
it is, Krakow. That's the island. It's
36:47
like the mutant island in X-Men. Right? Isn't
36:49
that right, Kevin? Isn't that Krakow? I
36:52
don't know. Now I'm thinking of Krakow, and I'm
36:54
thinking of, listen, Rudolph is only a mutant if
36:56
he's Polish. This is happening right
36:58
now. Yeah. I've
37:00
lost this thread. All right. Well,
37:02
Hal, as always, this has been a delight. And
37:06
Ken, as always, this has been a delight.
37:08
Yes. These are always really
37:11
fun. I love doing Clean Slay episodes. I
37:13
wish we could do Clean Slay episodes all
37:15
year. Maybe that's what
37:17
Santa will put in my stocking unwrapped
37:19
because it's in the stocking. The
37:22
stocking is the wrapping. Hal,
37:25
you sound just like me. Yeah. Did
37:28
you think it was you talking for a second? You're like, oh, I got a weird echo. Yeah.
37:31
Like you're listening to a mirror. These
37:35
topics are closed, but there are many
37:37
more to discuss. So please reach out
37:39
to us via email at [email protected] or
37:42
you can join our Facebook group, the
37:44
greatest community on all the internet, facebook.com/group
37:46
slash wegotthispodcast. It's where all the suggestions
37:48
for this came from. That's where they
37:51
came from. Thank you
37:53
to producer Ken Plume. You can
37:55
support him at patreon.com/Ken Plume and just in
37:57
time for the holidays. Thank you also to.
38:00
for Kate McManus, graphic designer Uri Kelman,
38:02
and my PIC, our QA
38:04
engineer, Jen Alba. And thanks,
38:07
of course, to our musicians Jonathan
38:09
Dinerstein and Mike Furman for our
38:11
score and theme song, respectively. And
38:13
thanks to you, the people of the world, who this
38:15
is now our sixth holiday
38:18
season with? Seventh holiday season with?
38:21
Eighth. Eighth holiday season
38:23
with? Wow. This has become a holiday
38:25
tradition for us, and there's nothing I
38:27
love more than creating new holiday traditions
38:29
with my dear, dear friends and all
38:31
of the people of the world out
38:33
there who listen and give us an
38:35
opportunity to do this week after week.
38:37
So to all of you, I say
38:39
thank you, thank you, thank
38:42
you. For Howl Lublin, I'm Mark Gagliardi. For
38:44
Mark Gagliardi, I'm Hal Lublin. And don't worry,
38:46
everybody. We got this. We
38:49
got this. Maximum
38:51
Fun, a worker owned
38:53
network of artists owned shows
38:55
supported directly by you.
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