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Season 8, Cassette 10: Learn from Your Mistakes!

Season 8, Cassette 10: Learn from Your Mistakes!

Released Tuesday, 19th December 2023
Good episode? Give it some love!
Season 8, Cassette 10: Learn from Your Mistakes!

Season 8, Cassette 10: Learn from Your Mistakes!

Season 8, Cassette 10: Learn from Your Mistakes!

Season 8, Cassette 10: Learn from Your Mistakes!

Tuesday, 19th December 2023
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Episode Transcript

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0:04

Thank you for coming all this way to find the last

0:06

tape. I know it seems

0:08

like an unnecessary journey considering all the others were

0:11

delivered to your door, but there was a reason

0:13

for it. We'll get to that later.

0:16

Are you listening to this in the cabin? I

0:18

hope so. I left a cassette player for you so

0:20

that you could. It's not

0:23

strictly necessary that you listen to the tape there,

0:25

but it's better if you do. You'll

0:27

be more prepared, and preparation is the key

0:29

to success. Well,

0:42

let's start with the good news. First,

0:45

you have not been fired yet. I

0:48

think that's all the good news there is. Sorry. And

0:51

unfortunately, you will be fired soon. Your

0:54

office is cooperating fully with the IID to

0:56

get together all the information they need before

0:58

they can make an arrest. Your

1:01

husband is cooperating too. This

1:04

makes it sound like you have a window of

1:06

hope that they won't find enough to indict you,

1:08

that perhaps there's still a chance you can wriggle

1:10

your way out of what you've done. You

1:13

can't. All

1:15

those documents you stole, the ones

1:17

that you forged and replaced in Mark

1:20

Ramirez's desk, the IID found the

1:22

duplicates. They know

1:24

you brought them home and kept them in a

1:26

hidden place behind a movable piece of drywall in

1:28

your closet. You

1:30

might be thinking, no, there

1:33

are no forged documents in my

1:35

home. The only thing behind the

1:37

drywall is some hoarded cash and

1:39

nine cassette tapes about personal development.

1:41

Well, that might have been true last night,

1:44

Greg, but are you sure it's

1:46

true now? You

1:49

think your home is the safest place to be. But

1:52

safety is an illusion. You

1:55

might be thinking, you never forged any

1:57

documents, you only collected what you found,

1:59

but please... Greg. You can't

2:01

expect the IID to believe that now, can

2:04

you? After all, someone

2:06

forged them and the equipment the forger

2:08

used is carefully hidden in your closet.

2:12

When the IID brings their charges against

2:14

you, it's all but over. Treason

2:17

is a serious charge and they will wait

2:19

before making it until they have all the

2:21

evidence they need. You know that

2:23

already, of course. What

2:26

you don't know, not yet, is

2:28

what happens to you once they've got

2:31

you. What will happen when they get

2:33

you. You're a

2:35

ham in the oven. You think

2:37

you can tolerate the intense heat and maybe

2:39

you will for a few moments, that

2:42

the IID is relentless. They

2:44

are careful. They do not make

2:46

mistakes. And they like to

2:48

take their time. When

2:50

you're a ham in the oven, you do not have

2:53

time. You will wish

2:55

you had simply been deep fried. I'm

2:59

sorry, Greg. I forgot to mention we're in

3:01

the bad news portion of this tape now.

3:04

You tried to get a coworker arrested by

3:07

planting evidence of crimes he did not commit.

3:10

And the thing is, Greg, people don't

3:12

tend to frame others for nothing.

3:14

They tend to frame someone to cover

3:16

up what they themselves have been doing.

3:19

So the IID has been wondering what

3:21

you are trying to hide. Apart

3:24

from your identity, of course. They already know your

3:26

name isn't Brian. I

3:28

have to tell you, you're having lived under a

3:31

false name for the better part of two decades

3:33

is not going to make them ask fewer questions.

3:36

But we'll get to that. You

3:39

need to understand that they're going

3:41

to find incontrovertible proof. Like I

3:43

said, they're just getting it all

3:46

organized, put into color

3:48

coordinated files and carefully labeled boxes.

3:50

They're getting statements from your coworkers, your

3:53

husband, your neighbors, even

3:55

some other sources, anonymous

3:58

sources who have some

4:00

pretty damning information about you. Prison's

4:04

going to be hard for you, Greg. Trust

4:07

me when I tell you that I know this for

4:09

a fact, from experience. I

4:13

don't think you have a stomach for it.

4:17

You believe you deserve the best. I've

4:20

never understood why. You've never

4:22

done anything to earn it. You

4:24

believe you deserve a shortcut to glory when

4:26

everyone else is happy taking the long way.

4:30

You have never accepted defeat. You

4:33

have always taken, but never given. A

4:36

true leader, someone who has

4:38

honestly invested in themselves, recognizes

4:40

defeat as an educational moment.

4:43

Failure is no one's fault, because blame

4:45

is irrelevant to the future. To recover

4:48

from defeat is to understand how and

4:50

why it happened, and how it will

4:52

make you stronger. Perhaps

4:56

I'm wrong about you. Perhaps you

4:58

listened closely to all of my tapes, and

5:00

you understand completely what to expect from defeat.

5:03

Life is death is life,

5:06

Greg. But

5:09

as I said, I'm not

5:11

optimistic that you have a stomach for prison. I

5:13

mean that literally. In addition to

5:16

your lack of spiritual fortitude, you have

5:18

a lack of intestinal fortitude, too. You've

5:21

been very sick. You can't keep food

5:23

down. You can barely stand up most days.

5:27

You've been taking a vitamin supplement that is

5:29

supposed to increase your focus and energy. It

5:32

promises to enhance gut health as well. It's

5:35

a shame. It hasn't been working. Do

5:38

you know what's in those supplements? Are

5:41

you sure you've been taking the correct dosage? I'm

5:45

sure you know that it's often dosage that

5:47

matters most. There are so many things that

5:49

are beneficial to our health when taken in

5:51

small doses. But if you take

5:54

too much, well, there

5:56

are some real horror stories out there. It's

6:01

strange that there's nothing on the

6:03

label indicating where these supplements were

6:05

manufactured or bottled. There's

6:07

no identification for a distributor

6:10

either. That's dangerous, Greg. Taking

6:12

unlicensed supplements from an unknown

6:14

source? Who knows what

6:16

could have been in those pills? Weeks

6:19

of taking them daily seems to have

6:21

done some damage to your digestive system.

6:25

Probably your nerves and cardiovascular systems,

6:27

too. Do

6:30

you think you may have had an enemy somewhere?

6:32

A predator? A betrayer?

6:36

What did I say about opening up

6:39

your senses? Every

6:42

hunter is hunted, Greg. You

6:44

have to always think like both predator and

6:46

prey. It was too

6:48

easy for someone to get to you. Remarkably

6:52

easy. Disappointingly

6:54

easy if I'm honest. You

6:57

did every single thing I asked you.

7:00

You were so desperate to succeed in

7:03

your plans that you became gullible, almost

7:05

as if you stopped thinking for yourself

7:07

at all. Even when

7:09

you wrote to me, angry, scared, you

7:11

didn't stop doing what I told you to

7:13

do. Tony, everything

7:15

is going wrong. Your advice is only

7:17

hurting me. Who are you? What do

7:20

you want? And

7:22

yet you still ate up all my

7:24

instruction. I

7:27

wonder what it is about you,

7:29

Greg, that makes you so desperate

7:31

to come out on top. You

7:34

ignore someone's obvious lies. But

7:38

wait. Speaking of lying, I was wrong earlier.

7:40

There is one more bit of good news.

7:44

Your dog is fine. He's great, actually.

7:46

I have him here with me. He

7:48

was very hungry and so happy to get

7:50

love and attention. I'll

7:52

keep him for now, okay? You're not

7:54

in any shape to take care of a dog, even if

7:56

you weren't about to get arrested. me.

8:01

Say hi, Paris." I've

8:04

been calling him Paris. He seems to like that

8:06

name. He's a bit too sleepy

8:08

to say anything right now. Wow.

8:11

It's been ages since I had a dog. Decades.

8:15

Last one I had died. Quite suddenly.

8:18

Tragically. Unnecessarily, really.

8:22

I forgot how lovable they are. Truly,

8:25

man's best friend. It's

8:28

strange this feeling of disappointment I have in

8:30

you, Greg, because it's exactly what I thought

8:32

would happen to you, really. You've

8:35

lived down to my expectations, and part of

8:37

me wishes you hadn't. Part of

8:39

me wishes you had been just a bit smarter. How

8:43

can we be disappointed in something going

8:45

according to expectations? Something

8:48

to put down in my journal, I suppose. Maybe

8:51

what it is is that you never found me. You

8:54

never understood who I was. Even

8:57

if we stood face to face, you wouldn't recognize me. I

8:59

say this with full confidence, because we did stand

9:02

face to face a few times over the last

9:04

ten weeks. You

9:06

never once recognized me, and

9:10

we did more than stand face to

9:12

face. But

9:15

I suppose you could be forgiven. I don't

9:19

look the same as I did all those years

9:21

ago. I've changed a

9:23

lot in the last twenty years. Well,

9:28

time to feed Paris. More in a bit. I'm

9:54

not a fan of Paris. I'm not a fan of Paris. I'm not a fan

9:56

of Paris. I'm not only

10:00

has bi-monthly video chats with me,

10:02

Jeffrey Craner, and my co-writer, Janina

10:04

Mathewson, but also director's notes of

10:06

each new episode and behind the

10:08

scenes features in our off-season. Plus,

10:10

and this is the coolest thing,

10:12

a Patreon-only within the Wires series

10:14

called Black Box, with

10:16

four new episodes each year,

10:18

released on Solstices and Equinoxes.

10:21

Equinoxes? And you can get

10:23

every single episode ad-free, or if you like

10:25

the ads, we put those out separately for

10:27

you as well. And we're adding exclusive ads

10:29

every two months for products that may or

10:32

may not even exist. Support starts as low

10:34

as a dollar a month, so if you

10:36

like what we do on this show, please

10:38

consider helping out financially and get some of

10:41

that sweet, sweet bonus content. Ooh,

10:43

content. Mmm. Bonus

10:46

contemporary artistic collaborative audio

10:48

efforts. I don't know, bonus

10:51

episodes, whatever, we think you'll love it. If nothing

10:53

else, know that we love you. And

10:56

now back to the episode. So, Greg,

11:11

how is it hearing that name again?

11:13

I've been saying it a lot. Does

11:16

it feel like I'm talking to someone else? Or

11:18

is it like finally being recognized for

11:20

who you really are? Why

11:23

did you pick the name Brian, Greg? It's

11:26

such an unassuming name. You could have chosen any

11:28

name in the world, and this is the one

11:31

you picked. A quiet name

11:33

for a quiet man. Or

11:36

did you steal that too? I

11:40

think there was a Brian in advanced

11:42

biochemistry with us. Oh, I forgot. You

11:44

never made it to advanced anything, did you?

11:46

That wasn't your style. You'd

11:48

fumble your way through one semester on a

11:51

given topic and then decide it wasn't for

11:53

you, that your real calling was something else.

11:57

That's how you ended up with a

11:59

hodgepodge degree, where you'd technically earned enough

12:01

credits to graduate, but you hadn't actually

12:04

learned anything of substance. So

12:06

you didn't do advanced biochemistry with me

12:08

and Brian, but maybe you'd

12:11

met him somewhere else. Maybe he took linguistics

12:13

101 for a bit of fun on the

12:15

side. Well

12:18

you don't have to use your stolen name anymore, Greg.

12:21

You're Greg again. Greg

12:23

forever. What

12:26

a weird name if you say it over and over

12:28

again. Greg. Greg. Greg.

12:32

Greg. Greg. Greg.

12:38

Greg. Greg.

12:42

Greg. Like a sound

12:44

an ogre makes, or maybe the name for

12:46

the black goo that grows on rotten vegetables.

12:49

Gotta throw the lettuce out. It's got Greg

12:51

on the leaves. Do

12:55

you know who I am yet? Are

12:57

you cycling through people you knew at

12:59

university? Mentally cross-referencing them

13:01

with people you've met over the last

13:04

three months? I

13:07

don't look like I used to, Greg. I

13:10

don't sound like I used to either. When

13:12

we first met, I was tall, very

13:15

handsome. I had glowing green eyes

13:18

like a cat and broad flat shoulders

13:20

like a Roman statue. But

13:23

not anymore. I'm

13:25

broken now. I'm

13:28

smaller, more delicate. I

13:31

stoop a bit. I can't

13:33

keep myself upright for long periods. But

13:36

listen, beauty isn't how you

13:39

carry yourself, and I

13:41

carry myself confidently. I

13:43

arch my eyebrow. I give a

13:45

half smile. I summon people to me with

13:47

a small movement of my head. I

13:50

have them bring me things, thinking it's a

13:52

way to ingratiate themselves with me. Really, I

13:54

need things brought to me because sometimes I

13:56

lack the strength to stand and cross a

13:58

room on my own. I

14:01

have found a way to thrive with this body I

14:03

have, and had I come by it any other way, I

14:05

think I would be as happy and fulfilled as I

14:07

ever was. But this was done

14:09

to me. You

14:11

did this to me. So

14:14

I think I deserve some closure,

14:17

don't you? I

14:19

have a persistent cough. I

14:22

can suppress my visible weakness in public places

14:24

for a short time. It's

14:26

honestly not hard. People

14:29

are fascinated by someone who says little as

14:31

long as the little they say is impressive.

14:34

But honestly, recording all

14:37

these tapes for you has been a chore.

14:40

It's hard for me to speak 20 minutes or more at

14:42

a time. Editing is a blessing.

14:45

I can pause a recording to wheeze for a bit,

14:47

and then continue on. You never hear the difference.

14:51

I just paused for 15 minutes to go to the

14:53

toilet, and then make some tea, Greg. You

14:56

didn't even notice I was gone. It's like magic. Have

15:00

you figured it out yet? You

15:03

might not have. After all,

15:05

you never knew the consequences of what

15:07

you did to me. You

15:10

never bothered to find out. So

15:13

who am I? Why did I make all

15:15

these tapes? Why did I do all of this?

15:19

The better question is why did you? Was

15:23

it jealousy? You

15:25

know, I don't actually care. I

15:28

don't care why you ruined me. I

15:31

only care that you suffer the

15:33

consequences. Don't think of it as revenge.

15:36

Think of it as the glory you

15:38

deserve. Well,

15:43

here we are. We were

15:45

never friends, you and I. I assumed

15:47

at the time that we had friends in common,

15:49

but now I think you never had any friends

15:51

at all. That everyone accepted

15:54

your presence, assuming you were there

15:56

as someone else's close pal. I

15:59

barely even noticed you. until you turned up

16:01

wearing the exact same corduroy blazer as me.

16:04

It must have cost you some trouble to find. Mine

16:07

was thrifted. Sage Green

16:09

with a silk William Morris lining. Yours

16:12

was brand new, a close imitation.

16:16

You must have had it made. Pointed

16:18

to mine and asked somebody to copy it. Fascinating.

16:23

And then it kept going. The

16:25

black leather wingtips I wore, the vintage

16:27

cravats you'd figured out were shopping by

16:29

that point. You'd style your

16:31

hair like mine, bought the same cologne,

16:33

the courses I took you signed up

16:36

for. You

16:38

were never quite able to stick it out, but

16:40

you tried. The men and women

16:43

I expressed interest in, you would

16:45

take out on dates. Do

16:48

you remember the time you borrowed my dog? You

16:52

wanted a test run to see if you

16:54

could handle the responsibilities of ownership. You

16:57

took my beautiful Susie for

17:00

one week. You took

17:02

my Catahoula leopard dog and you never

17:04

brought her back. What

17:08

happened to her? You

17:11

said she got hit by a truck, but

17:13

you didn't even bring back her body? I

17:16

didn't get to bury her. I

17:21

guess I'm not going to get an answer to that. No

17:24

questionnaires now. Well,

17:28

I was so full of my own future

17:30

in those days, I talked about it all

17:32

the time. I wanted to live somewhere in

17:35

the southern states of the former US, where

17:37

the days are long and heady, where the

17:39

food is rich and varied. I

17:42

wanted to find a pre-reckoning farmhouse and

17:44

restore it, make it something

17:46

beautiful and mine. I

17:49

had a lot of specific ideas about my decor.

17:52

I talked about how I wanted to paint

17:54

my ceilings a dark color with the paint

17:56

extending down the walls for a foot or

17:58

so. I

18:01

wanted to marry someone well-read and

18:03

well-traveled and take long walks

18:06

in beautiful scenery. Susie

18:08

at my side. Do

18:11

you know, Greg, I don't

18:14

think you've ever had an original idea for

18:16

yourself in your life. Hell,

18:19

you didn't even give yourself a decent qualification

18:21

when you made your fake identity. Just

18:24

change the name on your useless degree. Christ,

18:26

Greg, if you're going to forge a

18:28

qualification, you may as well boost yourself

18:31

up a few intellectual rungs. I

18:35

don't think you've ever really known what you want.

18:39

I don't think you know how to

18:41

know what you want. You

18:44

don't know how to be your own person, so you

18:46

take ideas from other people. You

18:48

took my gentle, beautiful life, and all

18:50

it took for you to be dissatisfied

18:53

with it was a tape saying you

18:55

should be more ambitious. How

18:58

pathetic is that? There

19:02

I was, twenty-one and sure of myself,

19:04

and this strange kid who never had

19:06

anything interesting to say was copying my

19:08

every move. But

19:10

if you weren't saying anything interesting, you must

19:12

have been doing something interesting. The

19:15

IID turned up on my doorway out

19:17

of nowhere. They questioned

19:20

me about extremist groups, anti-society

19:23

demonstrations, treason.

19:27

I didn't know how to answer. I guess it looked

19:29

to them like I was covering it all up, a

19:32

hostile witness. But

19:34

there must have been plenty of evidence. The

19:36

IID doesn't like to make mistakes. There

19:40

must have been just one small twist for you to

19:42

pull that made it look like I was the one

19:44

they wanted instead of you, and it worked.

19:48

You framed me and had me sent

19:50

to prison. Was

19:53

I just a patsy, someone nearby

19:55

to throw under the bus that was coming for

19:57

you, or was it deliberate? Did

20:00

you hate me? Want me out

20:02

of the way? You

20:04

had taken all you needed from me.

20:06

You had become everything about me you

20:08

wanted to become, and then you threw

20:10

me away. I

20:13

was arrested. I was convicted. Did

20:16

you check what the sentence was? Did

20:18

you assume it was life? Or just that

20:21

if I ever got out, I'd be content with

20:23

picking up the pieces and moving on, that I

20:25

wouldn't try to find you, that our paths would

20:27

never cross again. I

20:30

spent almost two decades

20:34

in a tiny dank room, rotting

20:38

away as I still lived,

20:41

and for all anyone cares, I'm still

20:43

there. Or maybe I'm

20:45

dead. I

20:48

got myself out into the real world, a world that

20:50

had moved on without me. No

20:52

friends, no lovers, no

20:54

home, no job. I

20:58

only had one thing to do. Find

21:01

out who put me in that hole and

21:03

return the favor, to

21:06

take from them everything they'd

21:08

taken from me, and I

21:10

became Tony Tallinger to do it. I

21:15

hope you were listening to this in the cabin. You

21:17

left the map to it on your dining room table

21:20

for the IID to find. Well

21:22

someone did. It

21:25

took you three hours to hike here, but

21:28

they won't be hiking. Can

21:31

you hear a helicopter? Well

21:38

this is goodbye. Like

21:40

I said, I don't think you have

21:42

the stomach for prison, but maybe you'll

21:44

surprise me. You've

21:47

surprised me before. As for me, I don't

21:53

think you get to know that, Greg. The

21:57

funniest thing about all this, you say.

21:59

I still wear my vintage cravats. Within

22:25

the Wires is written by Janina

22:27

Mathewson and me, Jeffrey Craner with

22:29

original music by Mary Epworth and

22:31

more of Mary's music at maryepworth.com.

22:34

This show is produced by me and

22:36

directed this season by Janina. The voice

22:38

of Tony Tallinger is Joey Rizzolo. Also

22:41

read our novel set in the Within

22:43

the Wires universe. It's called You Feel

22:45

It Just Below the Ribs. It's available

22:47

wherever you get your books. Support

22:50

us at patreon.com/Within the Wires. Within

22:52

the Wires as part of Night

22:54

Vale Presents, listen to other

22:56

amazing podcasts at nightvalepresents.com. Okay,

23:01

our time is done. It's you

23:03

time now. Time to

23:05

lead your company to success. Set

23:08

objectives for achieving omniscience.

23:11

Communicate a shared vision of an

23:13

identical Earth and reward success

23:16

with an empty smile. Alice

23:22

Isn't Dead is a horror thriller

23:24

road trip from the team behind

23:26

Welcome to Night Vale and starring

23:29

Jessica Nicole, a fringe Ann's Night

23:31

Vale. A truck driver searches the

23:33

country for the long lost wife

23:35

she thought was dead. But Alice

23:38

isn't dead. If you love American

23:40

Dawn, Sir Stephen King or Night

23:42

Vale, you'll love this show. The

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