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Derek Schoonover
The Face/Off PodcastEpisodes
Derek Schoonover
The Face/Off Podcast
A weekly Comedy podcast
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Episodes of The Face/Off Podcast
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It's a sabbatical, mother-fucker! I'm taking some time off! Also in this episode: talking, and stuff!
*Disclaimer: The following episode description was written prior to recording the episode, thus the events described within the following, and aforementioned, episode description may vary wildly from the events portrayed within the actual episo
To continue in the vein of endless self-exploration, and unregulated self-experimentation: On December 1st 1997, Dan Schoonover - a self-described Spontaneous Internal Combustion Expert - died in a plane crash! Dan was my dad! We had a complica
A monumental step in the evolution of The Face/Off Podcast! In this episode we begin the process of peeling back the dead flesh of old, tired notions, and then start to apply the healing, medicated honey of intense emotional self-auditing! Epis
I was abducted by a 375th level general from the Tenth Order of the Elastic Sun Tribe and subjected to a right of passage too gruesome to retell! Let it be known that I rejected the titles offered to me after the ordeal, and let them know, in n
It's a god-damn firefight! A real blitzkrieg on the front line! Some other combination of vaguely military terms that I actually don't know the meaning of, much less the proper usage of! Sentences that end with prepositions! Some other combinat
Winter is in the air and Face/Off is still M.I.A. In the latest episode of The - now nearly ironically named - Face/Off Podcast! Everything is dying! Celebrate by reaching for the bottom, and only finding mud!Also in this episode: drunken sh
Dropping back into the fold after some indeterminate distance of time and space - time and space needed for contemplating the ceiling from the vantage point of carpet (the whole ordeal requiring an unheard of - and frankly obscene - amount of d
Welcome to The Face/Off Podcast! It's some sorta whack-ass, new-age, self-help, bro-spiritual, pseudo-intellectual, rambling, hippy idiot's fever dream of an apocalyptic hellscape paradise by way of endless dip-shittery, and bottomless buckets
On location in a parking lot across the street from Mascot Pizza in dreary, dreadful, drab Spokane Washington! Who is this man sitting in a nondescript automobile of some mercurial nature, speaking into a microphone? Why has he come to our litt
This one, right here, is a shit show. It's uneven in every way, with false starts, false endings, long stretches of silence, burps, sighs, non-canonical location shots, breaks, rampant non sequitur, mind numbing repetitiveness, ranting, mumblin
Straight off the map with this episode! The canonical returns and is immediately shunned and beaten about the neck and shoulders! Tune up the chainsaw and sharpen your scum sensor because it gets real fuckin' stupid, real fuckin' quick!Also:
Yeah! Throwing off the chains of oppression and biting the thumb of the system that feeds us! It's the first Non-Canonical Bonus Episode of The Face/Off Podcast! Constraints of the gorgon Face/Off are cast aside and the mind let loose to wander
Episode 15! Strap on your ear biscuits and get down to the old farmstead for a tall glass of fresh squeezed pod juice! This episode is a real twisty roller coaster of the mind! Look out for birds! They are deadly at this speed!Also: Nic Cage
It's Friday! A new day is upon us! Reading, thinking, and talking is hard! What a lesson! Some less than tantalizing Face/Off trivia today! Feeling pretty much base-line about the whole situation! Ignore these exclamation marks! They are meanin
It's all about racism! My racist dad! Your racist uncle! Lo-key racists! Fat racists! Is Steven Spielberg more racist than Micheal Bay?! Is it better to be a torch carrying, parade having, proud, out-loud racist than to hide racism behind a ve
After a one week and one day hiatus, or “sojourn into the desert”, The Face/ Podcast returns with a especially titillating episode! Recorded on location in the Hico-Mart laundromat parking lot, with real early morning energy, and at times reac
It's a big pile of this and that, this week! Good times galore! Get on the ol' Carolina Caboose and whittle a stick down at the drinkin' pond! It's a real nonsense hootenanny. My spellcheck knows how to spell hootenanny!Also: RIOT!, trauma,
Back on track and feeling real funky! This episode concerns itself with the great dilemmas of our time: Finding ones self surrounded by pod-people replacements from another dimension! Time to die earth-man!Also in this episode: pin-striped
Oh god damn it! Another real boner of a show. It sounds good but is not good. And I thrash for survival in the oceanic depths of irony that threaten crush the life-force from my meat... This was to be a monument to the defeat of the concepts
This week we are rebounding from an abysmal Episode 007! Did Episode 007 make you cry? Did it make you break down? Did it shatter your illusions of love? And is it over now? Do you know how to pick up the pieces and go home? The answer is, yes!
I think this episode probably sucks! I didn't have fun making it, and I was bored the whole time! Feeling adventurous? Need a break from your happy, fun, life? Like to listen to a fat, white dude ramble incoherently? This might be the episode
In episode six, suicide! Finally! The ultimate simple solution to a complicated problem! Get in there Face/Off, we can do it! Pull up your boots and grit your tits!Also in this episode: food and/or lack thereof, militia nut-jobs who get to
On the fifth episode of The Face/Off Podcast, do we even recognize the fresh-faced goobers that we once were, five whole weeks ago? Battle worn and weary, I get down and dirty and work to define the structure of the answer to the question: D
In this episode, the student becomes the master, and reality is torn asunder as perception splits leaving a gaping chasm of endless madness! Nothing will ever be the same!Depression, mustaches, dead kids and the deeper meaning of dead kids,
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